[Moriarty x Reader] WAKE UP!
You were deep in sleep. Peacefully dreaming, but something was slowly pulling you back into reality. A little feeling was in your mind. You couldn’t place exactly what was putting off your sweet slumber. You knew it was a sound, but which one? Alarm? Car alarm? Voice? Voice. But who’s? This was your house. No one else’s. So why was there a voice…?
Oh.
It was his voice.
That damn bastard who wouldn't leave you alone.
You sighed and grumbled out a sleepy “Go away.” In return, you got a poke to the side, probably from some sort of sharp object. You rolled over and glared at the man standing over you from the side of your bed. “Shoo.” You said, glaring slightly through your half-lidded eyes. Moriarty, or Jim, just smirked, knowing he was getting on your nerves already.
“How the hell did you get in here anyways?”
“You’re really going to ask that?”
“Whatever. Just get out.”
“That’s not going to happen, sweetie.”
You growled. Of course he knew about your obsession with Doctor Who. “Shut up, Consulting Asshole.”
“I think you’re thinking of the other consulting asshole...”
You pursed your lips. “Noo, I’m pretty sure that’s you.” You felt him lean over the bed till his lips were near your ear. “You know it’s not.” He whispered. “Fuck off.” Was all you could say. You pulled the blankets over your head, accidently punching Moriarty in the chin, and turned onto your side, facing away from him.
“I am TALKING!”
You growled, he did not just say that. “Don’t fucking yell, kiwi-shit.”
“Get the hell up, KIWI-SHIT!”
“Go away, SHITLOCK!”
“GET UP!”
“NO, ASSBUTT!”
“Assbutt?”
“Shut up.”
“Can you get up NOW?”
“Fine…” You rolled onto your back and laid there for a second before kicking Moriarty in the stomach to get out of bed. He stumbled backwards almost hitting the bedroom wall. He finally got the hint to leave.
You wrapped your blanket around yourself, wandering over to the dresser. You pulled out a simple blue shirt, and pants. You quickly got dressed and headed towards the living room. Too no surprise, Moriarty was watching TV, with his feet on your coffee table.
“You should wear Westwood.” He suggested.
“Haha, NO. Pants and a tee are good for me,” You rolled your eyes, “Anyways, I’m gonna make some eggs ‘n’ bacon, soo…”
“I don’t want any.”
“Wasn't gonna give you any.”
He snickered to himself as you walked away. You pulled out two pans, one for the bacon, and one for eggs. You placed the bacon in the pan, and turned your attention towards the eggs. A few minutes later, you almost turned around… but saw out the corner of your eye. Moriarty was leaning against the counter, with a piece of bacon hanging out of his mouth. How the fuck did he even get that…? You thought.
You glared at him before turning back, angling the pan in your hands before flicking your wrist and sending the eggs to go flying onto the consulting criminal’s face. He jumped in surprise and peeled the eggs off, not expecting you to be standing right in front of him. You smacked him on the forehead with the pan in your hands.
“Funny… John did the same thing.”
“Okay, now I’m curious, how do you break into Baker Street?”
“‘It’s called “Shitlock’s” too bloody damn lazy to lock the door.’”
“Mmmmm, not surprising. I just don’t think he cares.”
“Now… maybe make more eggs?” He said as he wiped the yoke off his face. You leaned on the counter with your elbows. “Hmmm, should I?”
“Should you?”
“Nope.”
“Not hungry anymore?”
“Never was hungry in the first place. I just didn’t want to have to look or talk to you.”
“Too bad I can’t make myself disappear.”
“I wish you could. No, wait, you’d sneak up on me, never mind.”
“That, I would.”
“Just disappear already.”
“Already did.”
“Bye~,” you waved in a strangely sarcastic manner.
Moriarty dismissively waved his hand before he closed the front door behind him.
You groaned and slammed your head on the counter. “Yeah, he’s definitely the consulting asshole.”