Bluebirds

“Yeah. It’s done. She canceled her flight. No, yeah I’m okay. Don’t come. Seriously its just a friendly. Alright good. Thanks for checking up on me. I love you too Al. I’m fine. Yes! I promise. Alright. Thank you! Goodbye.”

As soon as she hung up the phone, the smile on Kelley’s face faltered. She’d only forced it in an attempt to ebb Allison’s worrying, trying desperately to sound as unheartbroken as she could, but she was pretty sure that wouldn’t fool anyone, especially her best friend. And although she felt somewhat bad lying to her, because Allison really was her best friend, she was also her friend, Ann's. Over the past two years, those had became intricately singular; hers, Ann’s, theirs. But not anymore. It was all over. She had been positive she was going to marry that girl and since the breakup, everything reminded Kelley of what she had lost. It was getting to be too much. Especially with everyone asking if she was okay. And being forced to have the same conversation with every person who asked about her was like rubbing salt in a wound that could never heal. It was exhausting, emotionally and physically. Whatever, it was over, and it was time she started to move on. Sighing, Kelley stretched out on the hotel bed letting her thoughts wander as she finally enjoyed a moment to herself.

Earlier in the day, an especially tedious training had just ended. Her anxiousness to be alone caused teammates’ eyebrows to raise, many of them new to the idea of a less than extroverted Kelley. Rushing off the transport bus into the hotel, she almost had gotten a clean break to the sanctuary of her room before Christie called her over. Talking louder than necessary, Christie wrapped an arm around her shoulders and said, “Kelley, why don’t we go catch the first ice bath, just you and me?” She threw a quick glance over their shoulders to the rest of the girls still in the lobby, quirked an eyebrow, and the message was made clear. Not allowing less than subtle hints to go over her head, Kelley inwardly groaned. She was going to have to this talk eventually. Internally steeling herself, Kelley continued to force a smile. “Sure.” As soon as they started their recovery, Christie, her captain, quickly turned into Christie; her friend, her mentor, her team mom, eventually forcing Kelley to talk. The bond they had through Christie’s continued mentorship in club and country made her easier to open up to than most people, including some of Kelley’s best friends. In a matter of seconds, Christie had broken through her facade and Kelley was telling her everything, stopping only to breathe and hear Christie's encouragement. By the time the conversation had ended, more tears were shed than expected and a good portion of their ice bath had melted. When they dried off and exited the room, the few girls still standing in the hall were polite enough to look away, or at least not mention the puffiness of Kelley’s eyes. Kelley nodded at them as they walked by, forcing a chuckle and mumbling an apology about hogging the ice. Carli, one of the dedicated few still waiting, shrugged, caught Kelley's eye and said gently (or as gently as Carli Lloyd could), “You have to heal the way you need to heal. It’s okay Kel.” She nodded and was about to thank her for the patience and understanding, but was interrupted when her phone began to ring. Checking the screen to see who it was, Kelley sighed. True to recent events, Kelley had to once again have the talk she'd just finished. “Hey, I really have to take this, but thanks Christie.” Walking back to the elevator, she picked up the phone and began to talk, “Hey Al, just give me a sec to get back to my room.”

As she was drifting off to sleep, Kelley was stirred by the sound of struggling outside of her door, a small knock, and eventually a keycard swiping into her room. She had missed assignments because of her talk with Cap, so she wasn’t sure who she’d be sharing with this leg of the tour, and was halfway hoping to be alone. However, in an attempt to remain normal, Kelley jumped from her bed and ducked between the bed and wall, getting ready to scare whoever was about to enter.

A small bang that sounded like a kick to keep the door open followed by a muffled voice’s broken words filled the room, “’Elley, ‘o not ‘care me! My ‘ands are so full right now.” Hope Solo struggled into the room, key card in mouth, two suitcases being dragged behind her, and a training bag over a shoulder. When Hope reached her bed, she dropped her bags and took the card out her mouth, wiping it off and placing it on the nightstand. Glancing around the room, she began to tentatively look for Kelley. “Alright Kel, you know I’m not easily startled," Hope said, "so its not even worth it. Where are you?” As she walked past her bed, towards the bathroom to check out the shower, a hand shot out and grabbed her ankle. Screaming, Hope kicked out and jumped away, right as Kelley crawled out of the small space, laughing. “God dammit!" Hope yelled, clutching her chest. "Every time! Why do you do that?” she asked, shooting a lighthearted glare at Kelley and stifling a laugh.

Kelley, who was once again stretched out on her bed, shrugged. "It’s funny, I needed a laugh, plus, 'I'm not easily startled'" she said, mocking Hope in an exaggerated high pitched voice.

"Oh my god. Kelley I do not sound like that." Hope argued, laughing and throwing a pillow towards Kelley's turned head. Just as Kelley was turning to respond to Hope, the pillow hit her square in the face, and she joined the laughing. Hope caught Kelley's eyes, and smiled at a familiar warmth and sparkle returning to them. "How have you been Kel? It's been a while," Hope asked, once the laughter died down a little.

Upon hearing the question, the near permanent knot that had left Kelley's stomach for the few fleeting moments just prior returned. "Oh, well, I'm fi—"

A sharp triple tap at their door interrupted Kelley, who's eyes, Hope noted, had once again lost their warmth. "Uh yeah, the latch is in the door, come in," Hope called, still distracted and staring at Kelley, who had since gotten very interested by her fingernails.

A head peeked around the corner. "Hey Hope. Kel, Ali, Alex, me and a few others are getting our nails done and hitting the beach before dinner. I was told not to leave without you," Tobin grinned, and stepped towards her, "at whatever cost."

"I was just thinking about how chipped and gross this polish was. Give me like, two– no, five minutes in the bathroom," Kelley said as she crawled off her bed and shuffled to the bathroom.

Tobin gave her a thumbs up and walked over to plop on the edge of Kelley's bed. After a moment of silence, she leaned in and dropped her voice, whispering to Hope, "Hey, how's she doing?"

Hope looked up at Tobin quizzically from her book now in her lap, "Uh, she's fine, I think. Why?"

Tobin cast an eye over her shoulder towards the bathroom to see if Kelley was behind her before quickly saying, "I didn't know if she had said anything to you. Sorry, I'm just worried about her since Ann and everything."

Hope put her book down and sat up straighter. "What happened with Ann?"
"I'm not sure, she hasn't said anythi–"
"Alright, let's go. I'm ready for my mani!" Kelley called, exaggerating a southern accent from behind a large floppy hat and big sunglasses. She had heard their conversation. She didn't blame them because she knew they were worried, and she knew she'd been shutting nearly everyone out. But Kelley just wanted to talk about anything else, and recently, her and Ann's split was all anyone could come up with. Now she had yet another person that was going to tiptoe around her and have questions that would need answering. Great.