Dinner Party
You found yourself growing every nervous about the dinner later today. What if you made a bad impression on Sans’ friends. Both of your first meetings with Sans and Papyrus were definitely unconventional, and you’re honestly surprised they still talk to you.
Luckily no one at work had noticed how nervous you were. You were very glad you weren't a shaky person.
After work, you had spent the next hour getting ready. Comfy was the way to go. No way we're you going to dress up in fancy clothes just to please some people you never met. Though your comfy was still a dress, and everyone considered them formal so you guess it didn't matter.
The skeleton brothers weren't going to pick you up for another twenty minutes at least, and you spent most of that time pacing around your little apartment. Scenarios of you messing everything up constantly played in your mind until you forced yourself to sit down and draw.
Your eyes were locked on one of the buds for what seemed like forever - that one line just wouldn't turn out right! - when a few very loud knocks attacked your door. With your heart in your throat and beating a hundred miles per hour, you opened the door slowly.
“HUMAN!” a loud voice that matched the knock came from the crack. You sighed in relief, no one was coming to kill you, and opened the door fully.
“H-hey Papyrus,” your voice made up for non-physical shakiness.
“ARE YOU READY TO GO?”
You nodded, grabbing your bag off the coffee table before following Papyrus outside, checking to see if you locked your door twice. Just to make sure. Your bag still only had your earbuds and charger (keys too!), you questioned if it was appropriate to bring and first before you reasoned the fact having both on you made you feel a whole lot more secure.
“Oh hey, Papyrus, you never messaged me back. Did you manage to lose my number?”
“NO, I WAS JUST A LITTLE WORRIED THAT YOU… DIDN’T WANT TO TALK AFTER THAT DAY.”
“Gosh no, I would have loved to talk to you!” you shook your head wildly.
Great, now even Papyrus was worried about you. Way to go, giving off such a pitiful vibe.
“I-I just wasn’t in the r-right mind. Th-that day I mean.”
The two of you reached his car and you slid into the backseat. Sans was also in the back with you, not in the passenger seat like you thought. You could feel the pressure build in your chest as you made eye contact.
“heya.”
“H-hi.”
“you’re not getting cold feet, are you?” he looked a little concerned, “‘cause it hasn't even snowed yet,” you gave him a betrayed look as Papyrus let out a groan at the same time.
“what? i’m just tryin’ to lighten the mood,” he smirked as he flicked on one of the lights in the back.
“Sans, stop!” you shoved him lightly while holding down laughter.
Jokes of the similar fashion, with giggles and groans mixed in too, filled the car the entire way to their friends. He was right though, by the time the you finally came to a stop, almost all your anxiety from earlier simply melted away. You exited the car with a big smile and a flushed face.
Papyrus bounced to the front door while you and Sans made your way at a normal speed. The door was opened by a goat woman, who gave an aura of kindness. You noticed the smell of cinnamon as you got closer.
“Welcome!” she smiled warmly at the three of you, “You must be _____, correct?” you shrunk into yourself a little bit as she gave her attention to you. You nod.
“Ah, good! Sans has told me a lot about you, I’m Toriel, please do come in!”
“Th-thank you,” stumbling over your words already. Just great. The brothers and you all enter the very cinnamony house, there is another scent mixed in, but you couldn’t place it.
“IT’S NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN TORIEL,” you were finally starting to get used to his voice, “IS UNDYNE HERE ALREADY? I WOULD LOVE TO CATCH UP WITH HER!”
“Yes, she and Alphys have already arrived, you three were the last to come.” Oh god you were late? “Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to finish up cooking. Make yourselves at home!” and with that, she walked away, to presumably the kitchen.
Sans tapped your shoulder before you could follow Papyrus to wherever he ran off to, “hey, you alright? you’re looking pretty bone white right now,” his smile was full of concern.
“Mostly,” you smiled weakly before entering the warm house.
Your fingernails found their way to your teeth as you began to gnaw on them. One of your bad habits.
Something tugged at your dress, you didn’t notice it at first. A small child was standing in front of you, smiling widely.
“H-hello,” you stumbled. As much as kids were cute, you honestly didn’t know how to deal with them.
They waved and moved their hands rapidly. You were pretty sure they were trying to say something, but you honestly have no idea.
“the kid says their name is Frisk, and they want to have you meet the others,” a familiar voice whispered in your ear. You had to fight back every instinct to hit the skeleton square in the face. It was a reflex over a habit, thankfully.
“O-oh, sure!” you smile down at them and they take your hand and lead you to the room everyone else is in. Frisk was a kid after all, so you fought back the need to pull your hand away immediately.
They led you to the living room you could only guess. There was a huge couch that could fit everyone in the room currently and then some. As well as a loveseat and two normal chairs.
There were four monsters that inhabited the room. A blue fish woman was standing chatting with Papyrus with a volume level that almost matched his. Based off the conversation Papyrus had with Toriel earlier, you assumed she was Undyne.
A yellow dinosaur or lizard like monster was resting on the loveseat, watching the conversation with Papyrus and maybe-Undyne. Though it seemed more like her eyes were trained on maybe-Undyne and she didn’t seem to be paying attention to the words.
Finally, the only one on the couch, was another goat monster even more large than Toriel. He was further away from the other three, and almost looked like he was guilty being there. Being the furthest away from the terrifyingly loud conversation, that may be turning into a brawl, you gravitated towards the goat man. You sat down on one of the single chairs nearby, shrinking into the massiveness of it. Frisk had joined the more, active side of the room.
“Nervous, little one?” he spoke in a very deep voice that gave a sense of loudness. Not as loud as Papyrus or maybe-Undyne.
You nodded in response.
“I see. Well, I am Asgore. _____, right?”
You nodded again, it seemed to be the best way to not mess up a response. His name seemed familiar to you. It took a while for it to register why. Of course you recognized his name! He was always on the news when the monsters first surfaced again. He was just everywhere in general. It was impossible to not know who he was. Oh god, you were sitting right next to The king of monsters. You found yourself covering half your face, trying to make yourself smaller. How could you act even remotely normal in the presence of such an important figure?
“You do not have to see me as a king, I would actually prefer you not to,” he smiled solemnly, noticing your reaction upon realization. You nodded once again, too worried to say anything else.
“Hey! So this is the punk that befriended you and Sans?” maybe-Undyne had turned from her previous conversation and looked at your tense position on the chair. Oh god, everyone was looking at you now. You glanced around for Sans, only to not find him in the room.
“Uh, y-yeah. Th-that would be me,” your voice sounded so small, but you at least took your hands away from your face.
“Great!” she laughed quite loudly. It took all your willpower to not flinch.
“Anyways, I’m Undyne!” Good, my intuition is still okay at least, “And this, is my girlfriend, Alphys!” she gestured over to the yellow monster on the loveseat, who waved at you when you made eye contact.
“H-hi,” she stuttered. Maybe you weren’t the only one nervous half to death here, it didn’t brighten up your mood at all.
“She’s so cool, and super smart! She used to be the royal scientist back in the underground!” Undyne boasted for her girlfriend.
“That’s amazing,” you smiled at both of them, a small pit growing in your stomach. Now you were around two people of significance. How many interesting people did Sans know?
“I know, right?!” she grinned widely, picking up Alphys and covering her in smooches. The scene eased the pressure in your chest a little bit. No one here was bad, just loud. Very loud.
“Not in front of Frisk, dear,” Toriel’s voice came from one of the doorways, “Dinner is done now!” she called after.
Everyone flocked to where the dining room was, you stalling a bit, wondering if you should leave your back at your seat or continue to bring it with you. What if it was rude to have it at the table? But it gave you a sense of security.
“you sure you’re fine? i can bring you home if you want,” Sans asked from behind you, which you jumped to his voice.
“oh shit, sorry. didn’t mean to frighten you,” he winced and reached towards you. Recoiling instantly, you tensed up even more when you saw the hurt in the lights of his eyes.
“I, I’m s-sorry,” you mumbled, giving up and setting your bag on the chair. You were beyond secure, and you doubted it would make you feel any better, “I’m just n-not good around people, you know that,” giving him a small smile. You ran to catch up to the others before he could say anything else.
Throughout the dinner, the pit in your stomach kept growing until it was hard to enjoy eating. You were able to hide it mostly with a smile and simple conversations. Sans kept giving you worried glances as you ate, and you pretended to not see them. You hated yourself for it, and forced yourself to think happy thoughts for the rest of the time.
However, during dinner you learned a few things. Asgore and Alphys weren’t the only ones to matter, Toriel was the former queen of monsters (she gave up that title long ago), Undyne apparently was captain of the Royal Guard. Even Frisk, they literally saved monster kind and freed them.
You felt like throwing up after hearing all of their great stories. Everyone in this room besides you was important. They mattered, they would be remembered in history forever, they’d probably get a day in celebration of them. And then, there was you. A pitiful human who hasn’t made a single achievement, and can barely handle being around people in general. You stood up from your spot.
“I, um,” you nervously giggle, “uh, wh-where’s your bathroom?”
“Oh! Why it’s right over in that hallway, three doors to the right, dear,” Toriel smiled at you. You nodded a small thanks and rushed over to the bathroom in the most normal way you could muster.
As you closed the door behind you, you had to fight back tears, staring at yourself in the mirror.
You can’t cry now, it’ll be impossible to hide.
You sighed and buried your face in your hands, attempting to calm yourself. Breathing in and out slowly for a few minutes, you were able to keep the sensation of crying at bay. After the feeling goes away, you flush the toilet and wash your hands. Just in case anyone was listening. You noticed one of your fingers had indents from you absentmindedly biting it and quietly groaned. That would have to be hidden for the rest of the night.
The rest of the night was spent secluded from the rest. You still chatted and sat near them, but mentally, you were out of it. You don’t regret much, but you were definitely regretting going out like this today.
Your cheerful front was kept up in the car ride home. Sans stare bore into you as well. It felt, disappointed. Papyrus had dropped you off at your apartment first, since it was the easiest of course.
“Thanks for inviting me,” you said politely, with little emotion.
“i’ll walk you to your home.”
“You literally dropped me off right in front of my building, I’ll be okay.”
“i insist.”
He wasn’t letting down, you knew he wanted to talk about tonight. But you just wanted to go to bed, recharge, go to work the next day, be on autopilot.
You sighed and got out without a word, leaving Sans behind. He quickly caught up and grabbed your arm, trying to slow you down.
“_____, will you just tell me what’s wrong? i’m pretty sure i- we can help you through whatever it is you’re going through. that’s what friends are for.”
Jerking your hand away from the contact, you glared at him. “I don’t /need/ help!” you practically shouted.
“Like, I get it, you want to ‘fix’ me! Everyone does!” hot tears began to pool in your eyes, “I can’t /be/ fixed! You can’t fix my soul crushing anxiety around people, you can’t fix the fact I hate the idea of contact, you can’t ‘fix’ ANYTHING!” you shout. There goes any remaining happiness left over from that date. Tears flowed freely from your eyes, and your nails dug into your arms.
Sans watched in horror as you crumbled to the ground in a wet mess. You were so tired, tired of people, tired of feeling this way, tired of crying, you were even tired of Sans. You just wanted the sweet embrace of sleep to take over. Never waking up sounded like a nice idea too.
He knelt down in front of you, hands hovering over your shaking form. Afraid to touch you, because he knew you hated that, after all you had just expressed it. But also he worried you would shatter at even the slightest touch.
You were very glad you didn't collapse on concrete, the last time that happened your knees and hands got pretty scratched up. Instead, you pulled yourself into a sitting position, head hanging low. Your hands found your arms again and started to rub them, your nails scratching at the skin as well.
“I’m just so tired, Sans,” it was barely a whisper. “I’m so tired of being this way.”
“i know.”
You manage to stand up after a few minutes, still looking at the ground. How can you bare to even look him in the eyes now? This is the second time you’ve broken down right in front of him. God, you were so weak.
Negative thoughts brought fresh tears to your eyes, knees almost buckling again. You saved yourself from falling by grabbing the wall closest to you. Sans and you walked in silence for the rest of the small trip to your front door. Sobs and sniffles were the only thing breaking the silence.
It took you only a few seconds to grab your keys and unlock your door. You thanked God for not making you shaky.
“S-so uh, th-this bye then?” you asked weakly once you opened the door. He shrugged in response.
“maybe.”
“Please don't be cryptic.”
He gave you a smile and almost reached out to pat you on the head, before retracting his hand again, looking apologetic. Then, he turned and walked out of sight.
You slid down the door once closed, holding you head in your hands. Today had started out great, mostly. What happened?
A knock aroused you from your almost asleep state, how late was it? You checked your phone before standing up. 2:55 am. Who knocks at your door this late/early?
Apparently Sans does. He held up a Tupperware container of, spaghetti?
“get well soon spaghetti,” he gave you a sheepish grin.
“You know you could have waited until, not 3 am?” your voice was hoarse, blatantly showing signs that you were crying well after he had left.
“that defeats the purpose of staying the night”
“What?” was all you managed to say.
“from your reaction earlier, i knew it would be safe to leave you alone tonight.”
“Gee, thanks,” you tried to sound sarcastic, but you were too tired to put much emotion in your words.
He wordlessly placed the spaghetti on one of the kitchen counters before moving over to sit on the couch. Having not moved from your spot at the door, you watched him get comfortable.
“c’mon, don’t leave me tibia all alone here,” he patted at the seat next to him. Too tired to object, you fell down next to him.
“can i..?” he was practically twitching, trying to comfort you.
You nodded, leaning into his partially stretched out arms. At least he asked.
“you need anything?”
“I just want to sleep,” exhaustion finally setting in, you couldn't keep your eyes open anymore. He gave a silent chuckle before setting you in a comfortable position on his sternum, falling asleep soon after himself.
Today was truly an exhausting day.