Chapter Nine
Summer sweeps its way through Bangkok bringing heat and rain. Sand starts staying over more and more at Top’s as Nick and Boston are going through their final run of being a couple before Boston leaves for New York- with Nick’s approval.
Sand had watched the Boston-Nick debacle for a whole year, trying to be gently cautious about his criticisms when the two are broken up, knowing he isn’t the poster boy for healthy relationships. But Nick is finally going to stick to the breakup, waking up to the fact that what he and Boston are doing isn’t going to end well if Boston stays.
So Sand lets Nick and Boston take up residence in the apartment while Sand cuddles up next to Top in Top’s luxurious apartment, such a hardship. They actually start cooking together, as both enjoy the activity.
“What do you want to do tomorrow?” Top asks. Tomorrow is Sunday, their lazy day together. Now that classes are out for the summer, Top has nothing to do with his days besides laze about or wait for Sand, busy with his non-stop job of selling booze or singing at Yo’s.
Sand’s hair is still damp from his post-bar shower, wearing a pair of soft cotton shorts and a tank top that shows off his arms and gives teasing glimpses of his chest. “I have to get some new guitar strings tomorrow so I’m thinking if you come with we can get lunch at that Japanese place nearby, the one we both like.”
Top watches with hooded eyes as Sand rounds the couch and straddles Top’s hips. “How do you always know what food I’m craving?”
“Just a mind reader, I guess.” Sand trails his hand down Top’s bare chest, as Top is only wearing a loose set of sweatpants, while Top lets his hands wander up and down Sand’s thighs. “But Nick is spending the night at Boston’s tomorrow, so I’m thinking we shack up at my place, just to remind those two that I live there too. We can have a movie marathon.”
Top looks up at Sand, hands warm on Sand’s hips, eyes trailing along the soft plains of Sand’s face, so beautiful and open. Half a year with Sand is both Top’s longest relationship to date and far too little time to be with Sand. He wants more. He always wants more where Sand is concerned. Wants to be with Sand, love Sand, protect Sand. Neither of them had seen Ray in the weeks since the blowout and Sand has admitted, even after the car incident, that sometimes he sees Ray out of the corner of his eye, always in public places. Sand had admitted that it made him feel crazy to see Ray like this, knowing it's unlikely that Ray is actually there. And Top had reassured him that Sand isn’t crazy and that Top will always be there for him.
“What if you didn’t live there?” Did Top really used to be so scared of commitment? So easily bored? The thought seems insane to him with Sand warm against him.
“Then I would be homeless. I don’t even have a car.” The words are teasing but Sand’s eyes search Top’s face.
“You don’t need a car. You can come live with me.” The words feel so right that Top feels a smile spread across his face.
“Are you asking me to move in with you?” Sand’s voice is soft and…unsure. Shit. Top didn’t want to make Sand feel bad.
“Only if you want to. I feel so happy when I’m with you and I hope I still make you happy.” Top says. “But if I don’t I totally understand. I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. You don’t have to move in with me. In fact, forget that I-
“I love you.” Sand says breathlessly.
Top feels his whole world freeze for one perfect moment. ‘I love you.’ He hears Sand’s voice say it over and over in his head. Never before had Top been so happy to hear those words. Never before had he felt like this. And to know that those feelings are returned by someone as amazing as Sand…fuck it’s the best thing in the world.
“I love you too.” Top’s hands come up to cup Sand’s face and his happiness is sidetracked when Sand starts to cry. “No, baby what’s wrong?”
“I love you and I’m so happy. Saying those words made me realize how long it’s been since I felt this way. I just got overwhelmed, that’s all.” Sand leans down and rests his forehead against Top’s. “Fuck, I’m so happy.”
Top laughs and kisses Sand. They kiss like it's the end and the beginning. Like it’s their first meeting and the end of the world. They devour each other, pulling off clothes during the brief intervals they have to part for air.
One second Sand is wearing clothes; the next he’s naked and on his hands and knees on the couch, the heat of Top’s body behind him. One of Top’s hands anchors itself against Sand’s hips while the other reaches for the lube and condoms stashed in the coffee table (Top really was prepared for anything).
“Relax baby.” Top says as a lube slicked finger glides inside.
Sand groans and lets the pleasure cascade over him as Top adds a second finger, stretching Sand open and hitting at Sand’s sweet spot with wild abandon. Sand is rock hard and his arms are shaking from holding him up as Top adds a third finger, absolutely merciless as he all but attacks Sand’s prostate. After a few minutes Sand’s arms give up and his chest collapses back into the expensive couch fabric while Top rams his fingers again and again inside Sand, causing him to moan loudly in the still air.
“Fuck I’m going to come.” Sand gasps out.
Top, in his usual fashion, stops all ministrations, pulls his fingers out and flips Sand so Sand is on his back with Top looming over him, also naked and hard. “Not yet baby.”
Sand chokes out a laugh at his boyfriend’s teasing as Top rolls on a condom. Top leans down and kisses Sand as he eases his aching member inside Sand’s tight heat, eliciting a moan from both of them as the kiss breaks off.
Top takes a moment, fully inside the boy that he loves, to look deep into sand’s eyes. “I love you.” He can’t stop saying it.
Sand wraps his arms around Top’s neck. “I love you too.”
Top pulls fully out before slowly pushing back inside, setting a slow but steady pace. Top watches every flash of pleasure that crosses Sand’s face as he angles for Sand’s prostate with every thrust, drinking in Sand’s moans. Top buries his face in Sand’s neck and starts to thrust harder, Sand clawing at Top’s back as he comes, Top fucking into Sand harder until he too comes, letting out a groan of satisfaction.
“Fuck.” Sand says after they catch their breath. “That’s one hell of a housewarming gift.”
“I aim to please.” Top says.
Ray watches Sand. At Yo’s bar, at Sand’s favorite shops, at the fucking grocery store. It’s physically painful to see Sand and not be able to touch him, to be with him. To see him parade around with that asshole Top, the both of them looking so fucking happy. It drives Ray insane. But he has to keep his head about him; Ray has a plan. Be the white knight when Sand needs him.
In between following Sand and catching a few hours of sleep Ray stalks Boston’s instagram account. It’s mostly used to show off his photography skills (which are impressive), thirst trap after-gym shirtless pics, disgustingly cute couple pictures with him and Nick, or derogatory comments about his closest friends.
And while he’s cooled off a little on his ragging against Top and Sand, Boston clearly hasn’t given up completely. A few months after Ray starts his little crusade, Boston posts a sneaky pic of Top and Sand together, making fun of the fact that known playboy douchebag Top not only broke his relationship record but has actually convinced Sand to move in with him.
“Fuck!” Ray screams and throws his phone at his bedroom wall, breaking another phone in a fit of rage. “Fuck!”
Ray was supposed to be the shining knight! Sand was supposed to realize his mistake and come back to Ray, the person who really loved him. Instead Sand is going to move in with that fucking asshole and forget all about Ray.
Ray is up and lurching out of bed. He needs a drink. He needs Sand. And only one thing is readily available to him. It takes close to an hour to search through the house before he finds his father’s emergency stash of tequila. Ray downs as much as he can, the burn like being reborn as the alcohol hits his system, allowing Ray to breath freely for the first time in over two years.
Next thing he does, a little unsteady on his feet and bottle in hand, is find a knife.