Love and Loss
“Elsa!”
It was not the voice she wanted to hear in that moment, but it was distinctly familiar. However, she was too confused to process the person calling her name from behind. The ice queen’s heart ached and was lightheaded. If her ice abilities held possession capabilities, Elsa would not be surprised, because the world around her froze. Her eyes swelling up with tears, she could only try to fight it and hold it in. She physically felt sick, like she was about to throw up. Elsa went down on her knees, using the back of her hand to wipe a huge tear about to fall.
Seeing strawberry red braids fall on her shoulders, she recognized the familiar girl all too well; her sister. Anna stooped down and attacked her with a desperate hug from behind.
“Anna.” Reciprocating the hug, Elsa clung to Anna’s arms crossed around her own chest, if not tighter.
“What are you doing here Anna?” It was an honest question, and she genuinely wanted to know. Still in shock, Elsa bathed in the peaceful comfort Anna brought. That quiet was short-lived, as her sister had to explode with questions.
“What are you doing here? What are you doing by yourself? You don’t know how far I’ve come to find you! Not only me, but Sven and Olaf as well. Did you find Tanya? What even happened to you?” It was too many words for the blonde to process, but she answered Anna with the first one that stuck out.
“I ended up escorting Princess Tanya back to Aldyn. Well, I was.” The words came out weakly, and like she was about to cry.
Releasing the queen from her embrace, the princess moved around so she could face her sister. Anna cupped one of Elsa’s cheeks, and rested the other hand on her opposite shoulder. “That’s not your job to worry about Elsa! I thought you were bringing her back instead? And what do you mean by, ‘you were’?”
“She ran away, again. Right before you got here actually,”
“What in blazes happened anyway? Literally, blazes. I could see smoke from miles away!”
“That was her.”
“What? Are you okay?”
Elsa avoided the question. Thinking or talking about herself was the last thing she wanted to do. “Her parents sent her to me so I might train her… Strengthen her powers… I really don’t know what they were thinking. But apparently they never told her the real reason she was in Arendelle, or that their planned departure. So she wanted to confront her parents about it.”
“Don’t you think she could have just written a letter, instead of irrationally disappearing like that?”
The way in which Anna said that made Elsa sweat, almost. It was like her younger sister to be passive aggressive at times, and her comment certainly came out that way. “It would have been a much more reasonable decision, however that’s not what happened. I know it seems like I did the same thing when I left Arendelle. I thought I could be much efficient without Arendelle’s guards slowing me down, and my powers could protect me better than most swords. Plus, I thought it would be the less threatening approach to deal with the situation. But, something unexpected happened. We were kidnapped by slave traders. Pirates. Mercenaries for hire. Well whatever their occupation was, we only just managed to escape since they drugged us.”
“What?” Anna said angrily. “The nerve of them! I can’t, and will never understand why people like that even exist,” anger turned to contemplation. “I’m just glad you’re okay. This whole time, I knew you were. After all, you are my sister. Now I understand why you weren’t able to send a message right away. But… it was still so difficult to believe you were alive, without hearing a single word. There were times where I was almost convinced you were gone.”
“I’m sorry, Anna. For everything. Getting kidnapped never part of the plan, but it still happened, and because of it, you were so worried. I’m just thankful you still had faith in me.”
Even when I didn’t have faith in myself.
Elsa looked around Anna. She was the only person, human person, near her. “But you left Arendelle on this trek, without guards or even a messenger?”
“I have Sven and Olaf with me, and the little ice bird your magic created guided us here.”
“Why would you do that Anna? If I had actually died, that would make you the last heir to the throne! Who’s watching Arendelle right now?”
“Well, Kristoff’s back there, and I know that reliable people like Kai and Gerda are…” The redhead was looking down and counting with her fingers, but was cut off.
“Kristoff cannot act as a substitute for you. While Kai and Gerda are responsible, they don’t hold the same authority the royal family has, unless granted. While I admit my decision to leave alone was rash, I did have initially… some reasoning behind it. You had no plan when leaving Arendelle behind, with only Sven and Olaf. Do you realize what impression that could have put on Kristoff? On the rest of the castle?
“Well I didn’t think you would be this far away from home! Every day that you were missing killed me Elsa! You’re my only family I have left. How do you think I was going to act?” She crossed her arms defensively. “And what is it with you trying to suck up to people anyway? Who cares what they think?”
“I care because I’m the queen!”
“Then act like it!”
There was no changing decisions made in the past, and Elsa knew their spontaneous argument was futile. It would only make the present worse. She resented herself for scolding Anna, especially knowing that the princess’ heart was in the right place. The queen knew she could not go back in time to change her sister’s actions, nor could she go back and prevent her and Tanya getting kidnapped. She had to accept the present state they were in now, and they needed to go after Tanya. On the way, they could write a letter to Arendelle castle, and send it back with the ice bird. Every moment they spent away from home, the kingdom would become increasingly vulnerable.
But currently in front of her was a worried redheaded girl. Not a princess of Arendelle, but a worried sister. Anna traversed such a large distance because of her love and concern for the queen. The princess was probably exhausted like her. And all Elsa had done in return was lash out at her. In that way, she and her younger sister were similar. They were quick, sometimes too quick, to argue with one another over pointless matters. It was a pattern they held to since childhood, and Elsa felt even more elementary. Within the last year of reconciling with Anna, Elsa purposefully went out of her way to change the dynamic. But sometimes, the heat of the moment would simply be too great for the two siblings.
It had been so long since she had seen her sister. Yet not so long where they looked like they aged. But something was different with Anna. She could feel the sadness in the younger girl’s eyes. Elsa stepped into Anna’s shoes. Her sister was probably very lonely, and even mourning over her, with the thought her older sister might be dead. If Elsa were in Anna’s place, she would have done the same thing, as rash as it was.
“I’m sorry… I just, don’t know what I would do without you,” tears trickled down her sun-kissed cheeks and covered her face.
Elsa brought in her younger sister for a hug, engulfing her, and started tearing up again. “I’m so sorry Anna. I did not plan for any of this to happen, or for you to suffer this way.”
Anna let every emotion out in Elsa’s arms. Olaf and Sven stood by a few feet off, giving the two sisters space, observing the interaction.
“We’re together again Anna, it’s going to be okay,” Elsa laughed at the scene. “Look at us now, this is ridiculous. Why were we even arguing in the first place?”
Anna sniffled, “It is pretty silly,” and then she chuckled to herself. “Look at us right now. I shouldn’t be crying, now that I know you’re alive!” Anna wiped her face with her sleeve one last time. She looked around and then back at Elsa. “Why?”
“Um, why what?”
“Why did Tanya run off?”
“There was miscommunication between us, and the king and queen of Aldyn. She refused to come back to Arendelle, and it was important enough that I didn’t try to force her. So I went along with her, if she was going to just keep running away anyway.”
“Yeah I know that, but why did she run away this time?
Elsa hesitated. She had no idea what to tell her younger sister. I can’t just tell her it was because I basically almost kissed her. Anna has no idea of my feelings for Tanya, or that I may or may not prefer women in general. But I can’t lie to my sister, not now, not again.
“You want to know the truth Anna?”
Before Anna could answer, Elsa continued. “I love Tanya.”
Anna paused, taking in those words her sister spoke. “And does she know that?” Anna spoke softly. It was not the response Elsa was expecting. But then again, she did not know what response she expected to receive from her sister.
“She does, now.”
“And that’s why she went off alone?”
“I don’t know… I don’t know what to think!” Just the thought made Elsa frustrated at herself. “She told me she couldn’t.” Her eyes were puffy and slightly watery now.
“So there was no definitive yes or no? It sounds like Tanya likely doesn’t know what to feel herself. Is that why you never were interested in any potential suitors? Because they weren’t women?”
“I have no idea.” Elsa was fairly positive she was interested in only women. But that possibility could wait until later. Even if she did, the only girl she had cared for in a romantic way was the Aldyn princess. “All I know is that I love her.”
Anna placed her hands on Elsa’s arms. “No matter what you do or who you love, you’ll always be my sister, and that will never change. I hope you know that.”
Elsa nodded.
“It doesn’t matter to me who you love, because whoever you choose I’m sure I will love them too. I know it’s not the most popular idea in the kingdom, for their queen to take on a female suitor. But I will always be here to support you. Maybe we can work around it.”
Elsa’s heart was lifted by Anna’s words, and was overcome by a wave of relief.
But it did not solve the current dilemma they were in. They did not exactly have all the time in the world to be absent from Arendelle. Their responsibility lay with their kingdom. Yet, Elsa could not just leave the princess of Aldyn behind. Not in good conscience anyway. The queen also made a promise to Tanya’s parents to look out for the princess, and she was determined to go through with her vow. But her sister Anna, and friends Olaf and Sven were here, standing in front of her. She had a responsibility to family and friends, as well as the people she cared about.
All the weight of her obligations was overwhelming. Yet Elsa needed to make another decision.
The ice queen called out to her ice bird with a quick whistle. From the clouds overhead, it soared down onto a tree branch next to her. With a flick of her fingers, a small, thin, slab of ice appeared. With her fingertip, she began to magically carve delicately into the smooth surface, forming words. It read:
To Castle Arendelle,
You have no need to be worried, I am alive and well. Princess Anna, along with the company who accompanied her, made it safely here. I am currently not in a place to be writing a proper letter, but will do so when I arrive at the nearest town. Fortunately, I have managed to find Tanya, Princess of Aldyn, and currently traversing mountains west of the Kingdom of Aldyn. We will be traveling by foot, so our arrival may extend a few days, along with the next letter. The princesses and I need no reinforcements nor supplies, as we are well equipped and stocked.
Please wait for the next letter to arrive, and for my word on how the castle should rightly act.
Elsa, Queen of Arendelle
Elsa signed off with her personal signature, while ice flakes flew off the slab.
“That should do,” the queen said satisfied, as she stretched her fingers. She had no fear of the ice slab melting, since it could not without her command. Handing the letter to the bird she said, “Take this letter to Arendelle Castle, and make sure that Kai, Gerda, and Kristoff see it.”
Responding with a light chirp, which sounded almost other worldly, its small claws grasped onto the letter. To Anna’s surprise, the bird’s claws appeared to melt and merge into the letter. It took off, high into the sky, out of seeing-eye range.
“We should be good for now, as brief as that letter may be.”
“Why did you say Tanya was still with us though?” Anna asked. “Isn’t that risky to lie about something like that? We don’t know where she is.”
“But I know that she and I share the same destination. If we don’t find her on the way, we will look for her in Aldyn. It would be risky to announce she was missing, especially when we are currently not back home. We don’t want to risk conjuring up rumors. Right now it’s our priority to inform Kai and Gerda that we are well, and for Arendelle to think we are still present; just preoccupied. I’m sure Kai has had to create many explanations to the public by now, to excuse our absence. ”
“Probably so, he’s pretty capable. And you’re the queen, so of course don’t doubt your judgment.”
Elsa could tell right away Anna was being sarcastic.
“So how are we going to find Tanya? It’s almost dusk.”
“Maybe we can just follow the charred trail Tanya left?” Elsa pointed to the ground. Sure enough she was correct, and Anna had overlooked the downright obvious detail. She must have been extremely upset and distressed to do that.
If Tanya was there right in front of her, the queen would be apologizing profusely. She would do anything to mend her relationship with the ash haired princess. But what if Tanya refused to forgive her? Did Tanya share the same mutual feelings, or was their relationship agape? And then there was the possibility Tanya just liked the attention, and not her. The queen knew she could not force Tanya to share the same romantic feelings against their will, but deep down she secretly wished there was a way.
The party followed the trail up the mountain. With the sun already down, it was rapidly becoming difficult to see. More than twice, she had to catch Anna’s hand to prevent her from slipping. Sven was there to support her whenever she did. Their feet were starting to give, and every part of her was exhausted. Yet Elsa stayed firm in her choice to keep going.
Finally after some time, they came to a descent, into the mountain canyon. They walked alongside the mountain, until the thick bushes and boulders turned into a small path. Elsa recognized their surroundings and realized the path was taking them to the secret passageway shown to her earlier. A big part of her still felt like she was trespassing into a royal family secret that was off limits. But she did not plan on using it against Aldyn. Only with the sole purpose to find the girl she loved.
The girl she loved…
It was an idea Elsa was still growing accustomed to, even though she accepted it.
The opening to the cave was pitch black. Olaf would have no problem, whereas Sven would have to squeeze through. Elsa and Anna looked at each other, as the trail led them to mossy opening.
“I guess it’s telling us to follow through here,” Anna said nervously.
“Are you alright with it?”
“Of course I am,” Anna attempted to puff out her chest toughly, though it looked goofy. Elsa knew however that Anna was one of the bravest people she had ever known. “But how are we to see inside?”
Elsa noticed a little waft of smoke still rising from the earth beneath her. Tanya was here recently. The queen knelt down and picked up a still smoking branch. Careful to not blow it out, she managed to save and create a small flame. “It’s kind of pathetic for a torch, but it will suffice. We should pick up and light a few more branches. Except you, Olaf.”
“Aw, darn.” The snowman said with a disappointed face. “I guess it’s alright, just looking at it is nice too!”
Sven grunted urging the group to keep moving.
“I’ll go first,” Elsa volunteered, “and you next Anna.” That way when Sven comes through, we can both help him from the inside.”
It was an awkward entrance, especially while holding a torch, but Elsa had managed to go through easily. She then caught her sister, who came right behind her. Once they successfully brought Sven’s head and front legs through, the other half came easily. Once everyone was inside, they carefully made their way down and under.
The beginning of the tunnel started off narrow, with roots everywhere. But the farther down they went, the more spacious the tunnel became. The roots disappeared, and the tunnel became a fully formed cave. The cave turned into an underground cavern, a whole other world they would have been totally oblivious to, if they had stayed above ground.
Huge stalactites hung from the ceiling, with many stalagmites below them. The walls of the cavern were smooth from being shaped by water for thousands of years. Hanging on the wall to the side of her, Elsa saw an unlit lantern, probably used by the people passing through before them. With the last of the dying ember on the branch which she carried, she lit the abandoned lantern. There was a spark, and Elsa realized that there was a line connected to it. The spark travelled and lit other lanterns along the wall of the cavern. Anna gasped. It wasn’t just a path they were walking along, it was an edge which went down to unknown depths. Olaf kicked a pebble over the edge out of curiosity. There was no sound of the stone hitting the bottom.
“Let’s be very careful…” Elsa held her arms out in a protective manner, mostly looking at Sven, who was the largest.
The reindeer only replied with a gulp, his eyes bulging and not averting his gaze from the abyss.
The further they followed the ignited path, Elsa sensed they were arriving to a large, room just ahead. No, it was not just large, it was gigantic. In the center was a giant cave pillar, as if it held up the ceiling, formed by stalactites and stalagmites merging together. Around the throne of a pillar, were smaller columns coming up from the darkness. The path grew much wider for the group to spread out. The queen hardly noticed the humidity in the place, due to being stricken with wonder.
“It’s amazing!” Anna said, her mouth smiling wide open in awe. Elsa could see the whites of her teeth.
The whole trail of fire circled the whole room, giving off a fiery glow. On the other side across from her, the main tunnel continued. There were other small tunnels, but not lit, and only appeared to go deeper down.
“How are we supposed to get across to where the tunnel continues?” The snowman pointed out.
Elsa realized, to her dismay, Olaf was correct. One way to scale across, was to jump from pillar to pillar, and by their luck, not fall down. She wondered if that’s how Tanya and the Aldyn royal family usually made it across. But another idea crossed her mind. The blonde did not need tools or a guide to go around. She had a natural advantage.
“Watch this,” Elsa said confidently. With an icy, graceful movement from her hand, a solid bridge formed from both ends of the room. She used the pillars to further support the bridge, ensuring it wouldn’t snap and break under them. “And now we can cross,” the queen bowed to the group, presenting the ice bridge with a circular hand gesture. For some reason, she had major déjà vu recalling events earlier that day.
Sven was the last one to hesitantly step onto the slippery ice bridge. Elsa, Anna, and Olaf were used to walking on ice. But the task was much more difficult for the reindeer, and four hoofs.
“Don’t worry, I’ve got you Sven,” Anna huffed as she planted her feet and supported him at his side. “Elsa, Olaf, direct his other side.”
The reindeer was a bunch of nerves. Never before had Elsa seen him shaking like this. Sven was panting frantically. If Kristoff were here, he would know how to calm his friend down.
“It’s okay, just take a deep breath,” the princess tried saying assuring. Slowly his breathing grew slower, as they moved half way across the bridge. “That’s it, we’re almost half way there.”
“Just don’t look down the scary pit of darkness. You’re doing great!” Olaf said with an open grin, unintentionally not bettering the mood.
“Olaf, don’t tell him that! It’s okay Sven, just imagine we’re walking across a grassy field. And there’s no dark pit at all. Why, there’s even a basketful of giant carrots on the other side, just for you,”
Anna patted his back.
Just as they were almost across and Sven was now totally relaxed at the thought of carrots, Elsa heard a loud crack.
The bridge!? No…
It came from around them. There was a great trembling and a new sound grew louder and closer. It must have been an earthquake, by the feel of it. Everyone froze in fear, but just for a second before the reindeer snapped out of his trance, and sprinted for solid ground. Boulders fell down from the ceiling, and impacted the ice bridge from behind them.
“Move, now!” Elsa yelled, physically pushing them forward. If there was more time to act, she would have used her powers to save them. But they were only a few feet from the other side. The bridge snapped in half and started shattering from the center. Sven made a giant leap, with Olaf on his back, and was the first to the other side. Anna took a couple steps before jumping, and grabbing on to Sven who caught her. Elsa realized the bridge was tipping, and the edge to where her sister was, was not a close enough distance. But she had to try to make it. Jumping and taking that chance, Elsa used her ice magic to propel farther forward. It seemed to do the trick, making her jump farther than usual, but she was still not going to make it across. As she fell down, she successfully grabbed ahold of an edge, just right beneath the rest of the group. With as much strength as she could muster, the queen did her best to pull herself up. There was nowhere else to set her feet. She wished she had trained to gain more upper body strength.
“Elsa, take my hand!” The queen, holding on for dear life, looked up at her sister offering her arm. “Sven, Olaf, make sure I don’t fall!” The freckled girl ordered.
The duo grabbed onto her dress securely.
She had to act fast. Elsa, from the little support she could muster, hoisted herself up to grab her sister’s hand. Just barely, she caught onto Anna, was raised up, and collapsed face down on the ground, panting.
Sitting herself up, she noticed a few scratches here and there and some potentially large bruises, but nothing was broken.
“Are you okay?” Anna reached out her hand and placed it on Elsa’s shoulder.
“Yeah, I am,” the queen looked down the dark, endless crevice. “You saved me, thank you.”
“Oh there’s no need to thank me Elsa, that’s what sisters are for. Plus I owed it to you anyway for saving my life, when you thawed my heart.”
“But I was the one who sent an ice blast through your heart in the first place.”
“That’s beside the point. You were the one, the only one who could fix it. I’m just glad I was able to save your life as well.”
“So, where do we go from here?” Interrupted Olaf.
Anna replied, “Well, we just keep following the lit path I guess,” but as she looked around, she realized the last few lanterns ended where they were. The lantern at the end of the line ended, going up a tunnel. It was highly probable they were supposed to go that way.
As much as Elsa was done with surprises, a loud screech came from the deep, which turned into several screeches. Heard a faint fluttering around them, something flew up from the ground, and zoomed past Anna.
“Duck!”
Everyone covered their heads and faces. Even Olaf tried to cover his eyes, though his twig hands did not really cover his eyes. A dark cloud of bats swarmed the air, making high pitched chirping noises. They ignored the four of them, like the first bat leading the way, flew past them. The fall of the ice bridge must have disturbed the bats from their slumber. Upset and frightened, they sought to escape the danger, and find a new temporary home. The colony followed a tunnel behind the intruders, the one Elsa had eyed, which she assumed would lead to the outside sky.
“Let’s follow the colony,” Elsa said as she got up and started to track their sound. The others followed after her hurriedly.
“Wait why are we following them?” Anna asked in confusion, though obeying.
“Because they will be our guide out.”
Very soon, Elsa would find she was correct. When they finally inhaled the crisp fresh air outside, they could see the sun rise between the trees, over the valley. Down below stood a kingdom, with a tall brick wall, and a castle in the center surrounded by a sea of buildings. From that view and without anything to magnify it, it was difficult to make out any more details of the architecture.
Elsa was just a little closer in reuniting with Tanya. And then what would she do? Apologize, and ask for the princess’ forgiveness? Explain to the king and queen why their daughter had run off?
The queen would figure out the details later. All she knew, watching the pinks, reds, and oranges of the sunrise, was that she needed to be by her side.
----------------------
Just a little closer, and she would be back home.
Tanya was able to remember the way through the underground tunnels, even though it was only the second time she traveled through them. The first time was on her way to Arendelle.
She planned it all out in her head. Naturally she would need one, as her parents would be surprised by her spontaneous homecoming. Notifying one of the guards who worked inside the castle was the better option, not one of the ones posted outside, or at the front gate. Rather, she enter from the back wall to avoid detection by any citizens. Avoiding as much attention to herself as possible, was probably the best option. After informing the guard, preferably the captain, of her return, she would speak with her mother first. At least she would be more understanding and willing to talk than her father. Even though it was obvious her parents did not want her by, she needed answers why. She craved the truth, and they at least owed her an explanation.
Avoiding the main roads next to the city, the princess travelled through the narrow alleyways. It reminded her of back at the port town, when she and Elsa fled from the pirates. She did not want to think about anything remotely relating to the blonde queen. Just the thought riled her up. It was easier to distract herself by recounting memories of her childhood.
If she was honest, her earliest memories of her parents were hazy. Even as a young child, they were not around not around often. It was the rather plump nursemaid, who raised her and Anton. But even she was not the best at parenting per se. There was no parental relationship, or connection generally speaking, between the nanny and the two children. However, she and her older brother Anton were close and shared everything together. Oftentimes they would read or draw pictures. In the castle courtyard, they would go and play games in the garden. Or they would spy on the castle workers, which to them was all very exciting. But when she turned ten years old and Anton turned twelve, their relationship took a turn. It did not happen abruptly, but gradually. Anton started to forget about her, as he focused on his training as future king and heir to the throne. He was deeply interested in Aldyn’s history, and political affairs. She would reach out several times, but he never seemed to have time. Long, deep conversations turned into short sentences or just single words. Her brother began looking at her like she was an annoyance, which she quickly detected. Withdrawing all attempts at reach out, she retreated to herself, yet still holding on to the memories of the childhood they enjoyed together. He was the only friend she actually had, and now that was lost. Going into her teenage years, she remained to herself most days. Of course, there were the interactions between the castle workers. But there would be a gap of several years until her next meaningful conversation.
Before her transition into womanhood, Tanya was keenly aware that she did not fit in. Although she looked the part and talked the talk, she felt trapped in a mold which was forced upon her, since the day she took her first breath.
Remembering her first ball, she was mandatory to wear a traditional Aldynic dress. Dresses were alright for the most part. But Tanya also liked the comfort of wearing pants and shirts, and was confused when her nanny said she should stop wearing those things. Watching the people dance was the most entertaining part of these events, as they moved so confidently to the music of their heritage. But Tanya was more interested watching the women than the men. They seemed magical and flawless, the way their hair and dresses swayed. Simply the notion of their male partners to so much as touch them seemed preposterous. None of this made sense. Not until her teenage years.
Her parents gave her an official talk, which she would be married off to a prince or duke as an arrangement when old enough. Secretly the idea made her feel sick. She did not understand why they had to force everything upon her, and decide to give her away to some man who would do the same.
After turning sixteen, her world changed. She found herself itching to get away from the castle more often. Early one morning, she decided to scale the garden wall, thanks to a vine and some bricks sticking out. That was the start of her many adventures into the city. She was never out for more than a couple hours, and no one would ever miss her, or notice her absence. Most times she would end up people watching in the market place, purchase a piece or two of fruit, and eat it at the usual bench before heading back. Tanya never went out more than twice a week. This simple routine act helped her keep sane while dealing with the pressures imposed on her in the castle. A few months later, she would regularly go near the outskirts of the city near the western wall. There was a secluded meadow there protected by trees and a creek. That was not her only discovery. There was a girl her own age who Tanya saw there consistently. At first she stayed hidden and gave some distance, watching the girl so peaceful and serene. Like dryad or nymph.
One particular day, the girl noticed the princess watching, and smiled. Tanya’s surprise presence did not shock her, and the mysterious girl walked towards her. Tanya did not dare move, when being within said she needed to stay camouflaged. But… she was tired of being alone. Revealing and introducing herself as a commoner, they ended up talking and became friends that day. From that point on whenever Tanya left the castle, she would go see the girl, rather than go to the marketplace. And every time, the girl kept her word and would be waiting for Tanya. Following many years of solitude, the ash haired princess finally had someone to talk to.
For the next year which passed, Tanya fell head over heels in love. These were feelings she was not able to describe before when she was a young girl, but now she finally understood, and everything made sense. Now certain, she did not view men romantically, but instead favored women. It was this love which kept her castle days bearable, thanks to thinking about her secret friend constantly. Tanya did not want to be married off to some duke, or prince on his high horse. She wanted to be with the girl she cared for. But Tanya was too afraid to tell her how she felt, let alone her parents, and she would never have that chance.
It was until one day, her friend did not show. Tanya pretended not think anything of it. But when a few weeks flew by and she still did not show, the princess became worried. She kept waiting in the meadow for several months more, until she realized the one she loved was not ever going to come. So, with a broken heart, she gave up. Too grief-stricken to leave the castle anymore, the princess stayed put and wore a happy mask around her home. It would not be for another year, until the next time Tanya mustered the energy to venture outside the castle walls.
Instead of going to her secluded meadow, she went to the crowded marketplace to purchase an exotic, red pomegranate. As she sat down and scooped a bite out of the fruit with a spoon she carried, she laid eyes on her friend. The girl she loved was laughing in the arms of a bearded muscular looking man. Reflecting the first time they met, they locked eyes. The girl stopped laughing and froze in shock, staring at the princess. Swiftly turning around, she grabbed her lover’s hand, and led them away. From then on, Tanya never forgot that moment, when the bite from the fruit she clutched in her hand tasted sickly and rotten. In disgust, she gave it away to a beggar while slowly pacing back to the castle.
From that point on, Tanya would never allow herself to get close to anyone. But meeting Elsa changed turned her world upside down. Though the beautiful blonde was the last person the Aldyn princess wanted to think about, her imagination could not help herself. When she first laid eyes on Arendelle’s queen, her heart skipped a beat before a fear based in anger kicked in. She could not believe it when the queen actually approached her during the ball, sitting right beside her. Trying to talk to her. There was something charismatic about Elsa which attracted her. Out of an automatic response based in habit, Tanya was snarky and rude which she immediately regretted. But the topaz blue eyed woman was not phased.
She was entirely taken aback when her parents left her behind in Arendelle, or that she would feel so strongly for the queen. Not only was she astounded by the queen’s beauty, but it exceeded all rumors the princess overheard. Her thick blonde hair flowed as a loose braid, and glittered like starlight. Elsa’s skin was as luminous as the moon, and her eyes were an electrifying blue. And she had a shining personality to match. Queen Elsa, like herself, held great powers. Not the same, but similar in nature. She was one of the most, if not the most, incredible person Tanya had ever encountered.
When Elsa had confessed her love to her, all her dreams became reality. But Tanya knew it just could not be, as much as she wanted it to be. So if they did care for each other, then what would happen? Would they go back to their daily lives, or would they have to hide? At least with Aldyn culture, she knew if she took Elsa for a partner, it would be severely looked down upon. She had no clue how Arendelle would respond, or even if either kingdoms would find out. All she knew was that she would not hurt Elsa any further. She already dealt enough damage. And she would not have her heart broken again. This was why she ran off, away from Elsa.
But… was it already torn in two?
She arrived at the western castle entrance.
Now she could finally talk to the king and queen, and set things straight.
----------------------
Kristoff paid a close eye to every miniscule detail or interaction. He did not consider himself paranoid, just careful and suspicious. He would purposefully go out of his way to walk by the kitchen at irregular times. More than once, he caught the kitchen supervisor, the head chef, poison both his food and tea. Kristoff’s meal would be passed to a lower chef, and then to Gerda, and then placed in his room. After a few days of observing this process, he concluded Gerda was not in on the scheme. But where was the head chef getting the poison? To avoid starving, Kristoff would either sneak a loaf of bread or two with cheese and meat, or go hunting and cook his caught game in the woods. That way, he could regularly monitor his food and health.
Following the habits of the kitchen staff, the chefs would go out into the market early morning to purchase the produce. Kristoff decided to follow the head chef during his market errands. He kept out of sight, where the city was less active, and stalked him out into the courtyard. Disguising himself in different clothes and a makeshift wig, he kept a healthy distance behind. He felt like a creep, but it was for a good cause. Between the two men were a couple carriages and horses caravanning through in a line, which sufficed as a good temporary cover. In the marketplace away from the stands, he patiently waited and peered around brick building corners, which led to alleyways.
There was nothing out of the ordinary, and noted no strange purchases or trades. The head cook seemed to have a routine, going around to each stand, knowing the exact amount of food he needed from each place. Yet, none of this discouraged Kristoff. The blond man knew he needed to be getting the poison from somewhere.
The supervisor turned around and made a beeline for the castle with his produce. The ice harvester was confused. He witnessed no odd activities, and the cook never went into any apothecary. Kristoff would still follow him around, for the rest of the day need be. He would not give up until he found an answer. It was not too soon after returning to the courtyard again, when Kristoff watched the head chef hurry to one of the walls. Casually whistling next to a stand selling vegetables from Corona, Kristoff watched him pull a brick out of the stone wall. There was something small which he discreetly took, and stuffed in his coat pocket. Carefully putting back the brick in its exact previous position, he pretended like nothing had happened and strolled into the castle.
That’s where he’s probably getting it.
This still didn’t answer where the poison’s source was, or who was behind the scheme. But it was another step in the right direction. Kristoff’s new focus would be paying close attention to the wall, and note anyone who came by. No matter how long it took, he would figure everything out. For himself, for his friends, and even for Anna’s safety.