No quarter was asked, and none was granted.
The battle raged on, testing the skill and craftiness of both participants.
Well-toned bodies strained and heaved, the war of attrition heating up with every successive swing. Competitiveness being a primary component of both Kiryuin Satsuki and Matoi Ryuko, it fueled their actions long after tired muscles and sore limbs begged them to cease further aggressions.
Cool, graceful calculating met wild, powerful unpredictability, matching each other to one stalemate after another. Just when Satsuki thought she had her opponent cornered, an explosive burst of unexpected ingenuity from Ryuko dashed her hopes of a swift end to the contest.
Ryuko found her efforts thwarted time and again, almost as if Satsuki could read her intentions before she even formulated them. Frustration powering her thrusts and swings, she started to emit angry shouts at random intervals, in the hopes that they would create an atmosphere of distraction and possibly provide her with the edge necessary to shut that superior face right the hell up.
“Rrgh! Whassa matter -ermf- Sats, hah? Gettin’…tired, eh?”
*whap-whap*
“Nonsense, I’m just getting -huff- started! All is according to -wheff- plan!”
*whap-whap*
“Gah! Bullshit, yer getting’ worn down…and I can tell -hyah- today’s the day I win!”
*whap-whap*
“Dream on, child! I shall -hah- be victorious!”
*whap-whap*
“You can’t hope to -neff- keep up with me! Ha-HAAA! Kill shot!”
The squash ball seared past Satsuki’s defenses, making the final score one point in Ryuko’s favor. The sweet taste of this hard-earned victory was undermined, however, by a glimpse of the actual reason for this slip-up: Satsuki had faltered mid-swing, pain momentarily contorting her face into an unmistakable grimace.
Ryuko tossed aside her racket, the clattering noise echoing loudly in the court. She reached out and grabbed a sweaty shoulder as Satsuki quickly turned towards a towel rack. “Hey. What was that, huh?”
Satsuki buried her face in a fresh towel, mumbling from beneath the cotton fabric “Well, that was the final point, obviously. I shall not dispute your skill. The match is in your favor, Ryuko. Well played.”
Ryuko’s finely tuned bullshit detector went off, noting the by-now-obvious skirting of the comment at hand. “Oi, I mean that last shot...were you hurt or somethin’? Yer face went all funny, like you pulled something important. What’s up, Sats? Are ya okay?”
The towel was lowered over a glistening, hair-plastered forehead, just enough for cobalt eyes to flash a message of brief annoyance. “You are mistaken. I’m fine.” She then busied herself with redoubling her efforts to purge her face of all traces of moisture, towel being worked vigorously towards this goal.
Ryuko stood there, feeling Satsuki’s tightly corded shoulder working overtime under her hand. She squeezed down gently, in an effort to coax her sister into halting this odd charade. Satsuki shrugged in a hasty attempt to dislodge this clingy impediment to her post-game activities.
“Do you mind, Matoi? I’m trying to clean up! Is this a new method of gloating you’ve conjured up just to irritate me?” The acid in her voice etched out the ghost of a hidden story into Ryuko’s mind...there was no way this was just about her latest victory.
“Put down that damned towel and look at me! I wanna talk to you, and I ain’t letting you get away with your usual porcupine huffiness! Tell me what’s going on, onee-san! I can tell yer hiding someth-”
Satsuki’s palm flashed up, a lightning-quick strike that smacked away the offending paw perched upon her deltoid. “It’s nothing! Drop it, Matoi!”
“Oh, so ‘it’ is a thing? ‘Cause people don’t usually refer to nothing as something!” Ryuko struggled mightily with the urge to open her container of generously-stocked ass kicking upon her unusually venomous sibling, staying her hand only because she knew this tactic wouldn’t serve to loosen Satsuki’s lips one bit.
Her lips did actually loosen just now, if only to peel back and reveal a sneer, aimed derisively at Ryuko. “Are you seriously attempting to pit your stubbornness against my own? Seek not to trifle with me at this point in time, Matoi. I am not in the mood for such foolishness!”
Index finger thrust out like a prison shiv, Ryuko ground her teeth at the dangerously leering Kiryuin youth. “Don’t you dare make this into a confrontation, when all I’m trying to do is care about you!”
Satsuki’s eyelids narrowed to glittering piano-wires of darkness. “Yet here you are, refusing to walk away when mercy is offered. Such behavior…it reeks of disrespect.”
Ryuko whispered now, volume lowered in inverse proportion to the urgency of the plaintive query. “Satsuki...haven’t we fought enough by now?”
A pregnant pause hovered over them both, the words ringing loudly in both of their minds as stubborn glares met. The young Kiryuin warlord hurled her towel to the ground, then swiftly turned without another word to walk towards the locker room. Ryuko blurted out anxiously “Oi! Don’t you turn away from me! I ain’t done with you! You need to tell me just wha-“
Ryuko’s outstretched arm was slapped away, a harsh action followed up by a harsher rebuke. “Enough, child. I will not warn you again! Nor will I be responsible for what follows if you do not cease your infernal interrogation.”
“Satsuki! It’s not some fuckin’…okay, look. I don’t know what just crawled up your ass and died, but I ain’t gonna accept anything less than a full explanation for this stupid-“
“LEAVE ME ALONE, DAMN YOU!” Satsuki screamed as she spun around and hurled a fist at Ryuko’s chin. Ryuko darted away, knuckles brushing past her jaw with a tremendous rush of pressurized air. Ryuko was wincing now: not from the pain of contact, but rather the sting of intention as she realized what that strike would have done, had it landed successfully.
Ryuko’s own fists automatically rose up, assuming the classic schoolyard boxer stance she was forced to perfect at an early age. “What the FUCK, Kiryuin? You wanna get into this with me? Now? Are you fucking serious?”
A series of flurried jabs answered her, blurred strikes darting at her seemingly from several angles at once. She deftly answered the blows, expertly deflecting them as well as her fiber-enhanced reflexes allowed. ‘Damn! She’s not kidding…these are meant to actually hurt! What the hell has gotten into her?’ Ryuko thought as she observed Satsuki’s lethally graceful form.
Though her hand-to-hand skills were easily on par with any top-tier martial arts practitioner, Satsuki’s stamina was reaching her physical limits, having burned through most of her energy in multiple sport-related bouts with Ryuko earlier. Seeking a swift end to this confrontation, she struck out with an extraordinarily fast De-ashi-barai foot sweep, designed to put Ryuko down for a quick follow-up floor pin and subsequent verbal excoriation.
Ryuko, however, had different plans. Executing a beautiful au sem mão de frente Capoeira spin, she nimbly avoided the sweep and followed up with an Esquiva lateral dodge. Satsuki’s eyes squinted as she recognized the form now being utilized against her.
“The martial art of slaves. You seek to throw me off with such a random form? How do you think I took on an army of COVERS, hands shackled with but a single toenail as a weapon? I mastered that long ago!”
Ryuko nonchalantly shrugged, warily sizing up her opponent’s stance as she danced just out of striking distance. “Saw it in a movie. Thought it was cool. Learned it last weekend.”
Satsuki’s eyes flew wide open, anger now filling her heart with unbridled rage. “You learned nothing! It takes more than just a few days of tumbling around to learn an entire art form, you sanctimonious brat!” Satsuki charged forward, her body suddenly leaving the ground to deliver a precisely-timed Kani-Basami flying scissor throw. Lithe legs caught Ryuko in the surprise pincer maneuver, one behind her knees and the other walloping her chest with amazing power as her back came crashing down to the ground with a sickening -thud- of finality marking the end of this combat.
“Do you see now, what pain does to you?” Satsuki snarled out, forcefully pressing her knee to Ryuko’s neck as her own lungs gasped and burned with the effort.
No response issued forth from the young girl’s prone form. Stillness crept in and created its own anxious wall as the Kiryuin warlord gingerly eased her leg off. She scoffed as she beheld the fallen foe now before her.
“Come now, Matoi. I’ve delivered far worse to you in the past. I know you are just stunned. Get up. Now!”
Still nothing. Eyebrow raised, she crept closer to assess the situation. “Matoi Ryuko, come on now. Silence ill befits you…your defeats are more boisterous and profanity-laden than this, surely…? …R-Ryuko? Imouto-san?”
Satsuki grasped both of Ryuko’s shoulders, peering over to look into her sibling’s eyes. Rolled-back whites were all that greeted her now, and her face drained to a ghostly white as the realization that something was dreadfully wrong finally hit home.
Her façade of carefully cultivated annoyance was hopelessly water-damaged by a sudden torrent of tears. “No…oh no! Ryuko! Please! Wake up! I-I-didn’t mean for this to happen! I just wanted you to back off! I-I meant to just…not like this! Please, be all right! RYUKO!”
Fingers of steel lashed out, clamping around Satsuki’s slim neck with frightening speed. Her reactionary gasp was caught mid-throat as her windpipe was closed for the time being. Ryuko’s eyes slowly rolled back to the front, glimmers of blue barely visible behind squeezed eyelids of defiance and terrible pain. A harsh hiss emanated forth from her grimacing lips as she inexorably brought Satsuki’s face to her own.
“C-can’t…feel my fucking legs, Kiryuin. That what you were goin’ for, here? You teachin’ me a lesson in humility, or lack of mobility today, Sensei-Touchy-Bitchy-San?” she spat, breath hitching painfully as she did.
“R-r-chk-Ry-uko-I-m-s-sorr-ktch!” was measured out in tiny, jerky spasms as the Kiryuin warrior pawed weakly at the adamantine grasp that now encircled her throat. Ryuko huffed an exasperated sigh and loosened her grip a bit, allowing Satsuki to access the wonders of oxygen and vision again.
Satsuki coughed and sputtered, yet made no move to extricate herself from her sister’s rough clutches. Looking down upon Ryuko’s pale, agony-contorted face, she wrestled with the dawning knowledge that she had royally screwed up her attempt at an impromptu lesson about privacy and deserved whatever was decided as retribution.
“Sats…if I were human, I would now most likely be dead. I can feel at least three, no, four broken ribs…I can’t feel below my waist...and I think you might have actually cracked my fucking pelvis. Didn’t think this was what might break my pelvis, ya know? I mean, the way you wield that strap-on was the way I thought it would go, if it was gonna happen at all…ya sweaty pile-driving maniac…”
Hair clinging to her sweat-slicked brow, Satsuki went limp and hung there in Ryuko’s steel claw, tears pattering down upon Ryuko’s polo shirt. She shrugged weakly and tried to explain her actions, but nothing came to mind. Eyes scrunched shut, she wept, caressing Ryuko’s bulging arm in an attempt to wordlessly communicate the bottomless sorrow of her shameful deeds.
“H-hurts…so…sorry, hurts so much, sorry…don’t know…why…” she managed to burble, and Ryuko shouted out “No shit, it hurts! Ya fuckin’ broke a couple of my bones, ya overzealous bitch!”, furious at the perceived condescension.
Satsuki’s head jerked back and forth, hands shakily pointing at herself. “S-sorry, n-no, Ryuko! I meant…me. I hurt. My…p-pain!” Ryuko’s anger-clenched face relaxed to a dumbfounded slack-jawed stare, refusing to believe what she was hearing from her tough-as-nails sibling. She reflexively released her grip, and Satsuki fell down onto her hands and knees, coughing wetly as she did.
“Wha-what’s goin’ on here, Satsuki? You gonna finally talk to me about this? Or do I have to lose a goddamned body part or something to get ya to actually-” Delicate, trembling fingers shushed her lips as Satsuki reached out to caress Ryuko’s puzzled face.
“I am so very, very sorry for my actions. I have no right to even speak to you, Matoi Ryuko. I have never been so ashamed of my terrible decisions in all my life…!” Satsuki bowed over, placing both her hands upon Ryuko’s heaving bosom, praying that she could somehow will her life force over to heal the damage she had caused.
“No, ah…-ow, damn-, n-no worries, nee-san! I’m gonna heal, o-okay? I can feel it happening right now! I have sensations in my feet now, so that’s good! Come on, I’m tougher than that, ya big bully! Jus’ gimme a few minutes and I’ll be good as new…gotta just…-ouch- lay here fer a bit and let the fibers work their good old ‘cheat code’ magic, right?” Ryuko forced a broad smile past her agony in the hopes that it would signal Satsuki to ease up a bit on the throttle of her enormously powerful guilt train.
“Ch-cheat code? What do you m-mean? How did you cheat, Ryuko? I don’t understand…are you all right, after all? Did I cause any…permanent damage? Please tell me I didn’t!” Satsuki sputtered, wincing at the very idea of her inability to properly cope with her own issues claiming yet another victim.
Ryuko rolled her eyes. “Aw, no I didn’t mean it like that! What I meant was that having these life fibers is like a cheat code for real life, ya know? Like I got a real ‘God Mode’ working here, right? Like in a video game? I mean, not that I’ve ever needed to use one, because my talent just allows me to kick ass in every way possible anyways! But, ya know. Hypothetically?”
Wiping errant traces of moisture away from her reddened cheeks, Satsuki shrugged and mumbled “I…guess? I assume you mean hacking a computer game or something? I am not entirely up on the nomenclature of such activities. I’ve never really played a video game, as such. I have observed Inumuta and Sanageyama yelling at the screen at various times while playing some game or other, and Jakazure is certainly proud of her ‘Violin Hero’ high score…but I-“
“Whoa, whoa…just hooold up a moment there, will ya? What do you mean, you’ve ‘never played a video game’? How the fuck is that even possible, Kiryuin?”
“Well, it means…er, exactly what it sounds like? I mean, do you really think that I had the time to pursue such juvenile activities? I had a mother to kill and a planet to save! The closest I came to ‘video games’ was studying computerized battle tactics and researching classic wartime scenarios! I didn’t have time to learn things like your silly ‘Battlefield’ game! I was out there, doing it for real, Matoi!”
“Okay, okay! I get it! Is that why you never join me when I play? Ya don’t even know how?”
“Well, yes…that is true, I suppose …and I have no real desire to immerse myself in violent combat anymore.”
“Oh -snort-…yeah, I can see that…from way down here, in the bottom of yet another crater you put me in, Kiryuin.”
“I…I am truly sorry, Ryuko! I didn’t mean to hurt you! I just…you wouldn’t leave me alone, and I wasn’t ready to discuss my current…condition, and I just lashed out! I know this does not excuse my actions! But please…find it in your heart to forgive me, someday?”
‘Yeah…fine, okay.”
“R-really? Just like that, you’ll accept my apology?”
“Pfft, oh hell no, woman! I’m gonna milk this guilt trip fer allll its worth! I imagine you’ll just have to suck it up and wait on me hand and foot, until I’m ready to bestow my precious forgiveness upon thee!”
“Very well. I shall do whatever you wish until you are ready to accept me back into your life. I have inflicted a terrible grievance upon you, and I owe it to you to fulfill this solemn vow of-“
“Oi, Satsuki, fer the love of…shut up, already! I was so very joking, okay? I’m not the type to have you all groveling before me like Gamagōri! Come on! Don’t even be that way, it creeps me out! It’s not like you at all!”
“I-I...oh. W-well, I still think I am honor bound to perform some form of-“
“Ah ah, don’t you say another word. All you owe me right now is full disclosure. If you really have some kind of health problem, you need to come clean with me about it. My worrying is hurting me way more than my ribs are right now…and I know the ribs will be all healed up soon. I’m not so sure about you, though…? So, just what is going on here, nee-san? Is it…is it really bad?”
“Ah, well…I should say not, I believe. It’s just…constant chronic pain. That’s all. I’m just having a hard time dealing with it at the same time as fulfilling my duty as REVOCS CEO…and fighting the constant liability lawsuits…and supervising the last of the clean-up efforts…and perhaps all this stress is keeping me from achieving my fullest potential.”
“Okay, Sats. I can see how something like that would make you a bit crabby. Well, crabbier than usual, anyways. But…pain from what, exactly? How were you injured? It isn’t some, um…weird alien disease, is it?”
“It’s…more a matter of how wasn’t I injured, Ryuko? When I first attempted to rid the world of my mother’s fevered ego nearly a year ago, I suffered the first truly horrific defeat I had ever known. She utterly outclassed me in physical combat, hurled me full-force against the stadium’s walls without Junketsu to absorb the kinetic energy of the blow, beat me nearly to death…and then hung me from shackles in that damned cage for nearly a month. I…I didn’t heal right, Ryuko. My bones…shattered! My tendons, muscles, nerves…oh, gods in heaven the pain! Ragyo didn’t exactly ease me down at night to rest properly! Sometimes I was dragged down to th-the baths on a whim, just to cleanse me of my blood and filth and gore…and then she would j-just…rape m-me again. I had to shut it all out, for fear of my sanity. I had to! I needed to rectify my tactical errors in judgment! The stakes were too damned high! A-and when I discovered that you actually were my long-lost sister…I used that sacred knowledge to find a spark of willpower inside me! To fan it into a flame of rebellion, once again! I just had to keep fighting! For you!”
Satsuki straightened up just then, poised upon her knees while she spread out her arms in a wide-open gesture. Her figure trembling slightly to keep desperate balance, she looked down upon her sister, searching for plaintive understanding regardless of her own fear and shame’s attempts to take control and force a tearful retreat.
“Now, my body is paying the price for my reckless hubris. I have bone spurs growing in my joints. My spine is now permanently crooked from improper healing. Sciatica, sacroiliitis…even carpal fucking tunnel syndrome. Apparently gripping Bakuzan with the force of a thousand suns wasn’t sustainable in the long term…HA! Who would have guessed? These are the effects from all the earth-shattering blows, the titanic struggles…plus, oh how the human nervous system suffers the wrath of long-term exposure to an evil kamui. Ironic, yes? The eventual rejection of my ‘purity’ leading to this…corruption. If only I had allowed Junketsu to fully possess me…it could have spared me from this rot? Kept me pure in body, if not in spirit? I’m falling apart, Matoi. Right before your very eyes.”
Ryuko snuffled, tears of concern succeeding where tears of agony had failed to disturb her proud cheeks. She struggled to sit up, ignoring the searing stabs of not-quite-knitted-together-yet ribs as they lanced her tender sides. An awkward sitting position was finally achieved, mostly by vast amounts of sheer willpower spiked with a fair amount of adrenaline.
“Satsuki. I’m so very proud of you. Everything you’ve accomplished is simply the stuff of legend…but if you’ve been hurting all this time, why didn’t you come to me so I can help you? You’ve done enough in your lifetime to earn some rest, a thousand times over! I can take care of you, nee-san…I can…do stuff for you! I can learn to-“
Satsuki pounded her bulging thighs, the harsh slapping sound echoing in the court chamber. “I don’t want your fucking pity, Ryuko! This is exactly what I did not want to hear! Dammit, Matoi! You don’t get to…to…I AM NOT WEAK! Don’t treat me like a worthless weakling! I will not suffer such indignance! Do you hear me? DO YOU?! I am Kiryuin goddamned Satsuki! I am not WEAK!”
Ryuko stared at her sister, the frantic outburst stinging her like hot ashes from a mansion fire. “Wh-buh-I-if yer not gonna let me care fer you…then what good am I? Huh? What good am I to you, Kiryuin goddamned Satsuki? If I can’t even care for the only person who…yer makin’ me feel worthless! Am I supposed to just stand by and watch you disintegrate? You stubborn…fucking…idiot! How can ya do that to me? I-I ain’t weak, either! Yeah, I get it, you think I’m stupid, and maybe compared to you I am…but I’m really good at caring! I’ve learned that much by now, at least! I know what really matters in life! I know what matters, dammit! You matter to me! Get it? Do youhear me? DO YOU?!”
They glared at each other, the air between them turned to emotionally charged electricity. Satsuki struck out first, words darting out in frustration before she had a chance to modulate their poisonous tone. “Matoi. I do not think you are stupid.”
A mirthless laugh barked out as Ryuko ran frustrated fingers through her ruddy-tinged mop of sweaty hair. “Oh yeah...right. Like I can’t sense how you feel, every damned time you chastise me fer not applying myself properly, like I’m supposed to be a fucking academic wizard or something! I’m so fuckin’ sorry I don’t have the mental fortitude or whatever you have to make myself into a career-minded woman like you! I ain’t made like you, Kiryuin!”
Satsuki frowned. “No, I should hope not, Ryuko. I was born of savage necessity and intense, unrelenting pressure. I would not want this for you...ever. I only wish for you to someday realize just how amazingly talented you are, if you would but try to apply yourself!”
Teeth gritted hard, Ryuko shook a diamond-crushing fist vigorously enough to shake her entire body. “Can’t ya just leave well enough alone, Kiryuin? Huh? Can’t ya just leave it to me? You just gotta butt in, always knowing better than me about how to live my own damned life?”
Satsuki closed her eyes, her facial expression blank as she uttered a quiet revelation. “Ah. Now do you perhaps understand how I feel…about my own life’s pain?”
Ryuko froze, a sudden rush of cold certainty flooding over her with a current of icy whorls and eddies. Her physical freezing turned into a mental block of ice as well, the struggle between her knowing she was absolutely in the right conflicting with her hunch that she was being obstinately wrong towards her sibling’s feelings.
Ryuko started stroking her own upper arms absentmindedly, desperately wishing it was another set of gentle hands providing the sensations instead. “O-okay. I guess I…need to try to understand your point of view…even though I can’t actually fit my head up my own ass? I swear I’m not ever gonna coddle you or anything, all right? But if there is ever anything I can do to help….will ya promise me that you’ll actually tell me? Please, nee-san?”
Satsuki’s hands came down to rest upon her tired thighs, patting repeatedly upon them in a nervous, unintentional reveal of her own chaotic mental status. Her eyes grew distant, warbling back and forth in a frantic effort to dig up a convincing front of omniscience and wisdom beyond her years. Unfortunately, her jumbled psyche could only conjure up spasmolytic grid-lock…so she continued to kneel in front of her sister, shrugging weakly as the desired authoritarian words proceeded to evade her tongue.
Ryuko frowned, failing thus far in her efforts to get Satsuki to trust her intentions. “Look, I…understand that you maybe have trust issues, yeah? Ha-ha, like I ain’t pretty much made up almost entirely of those myself, right? Maybe try to see it from my view though, huh? I want to ease yer pain, any way I can. I can’t stand the idea of you hurting any more, nee-san...you’ve done that enough, haven’t ya? Haven’t we both?”
Satsuki slowly blinked, then swallowed nervously, her diminutive Adam’s apple bobbing and lurching in an animated effort. A pearl of sweat streaked down her delicate, patrician neck, her nails absentmindedly scratching away at its annoying tickle as an unconscious afterthought. “It’s not…that I don’t trust you. I do, Ryuko, I promise you that this is true! I just…dammit, I don’t know, all right? There’s something inside of me, it just won’t let go! I’m…I…it makes me so frustrated, and so very angry! I was always able to channel my fury into something more useful in the past. I directed it into my enemies, my combat practice, my work. But now I don’t have to carefully measure and obfuscate my every thought, now that she is dead and gone. I…know that I should be more honest about my feelings, but old habits are so very hard to break, Ryuko. I can’t very well unleash my full anger in a board room full of incompetent executives these days, although that thought certainly pleases me!”
Shoulders hunched limply over her tired frame, Ryuko nodded a tiny confirmation of understanding. She poked and prodded her feet, quietly testing for any leftover tingling in her extremities as she mumbled in a subdued tone “If it would help, Sats, you can...um, get angry at me? I c’n take it. Better me than someone who might actually be killed in the process, I guess. Look, I’m mostly healed already, see?” Toes were wiggled playfully to accentuate this thought.
Satsuki gasped, her fingers rushing to cover lips contorted by shock. “Matoi Ryuko! No! Wh-what are you even saying? I cannot seek to harm you in order to gain some sort of twisted gratification! This is pure lunacy!”
Eyes of cold navy peered up at Satsuki, pleading with quiet conviction. “I…would do it for you, though. I’d do anything; suffer any ordeal to ease your suffering! I...I wouldn’t mind, even? It’s all good! I can thrive on any kind of attention, as long as ya don’t ever think of l-leaving me? Okay, Satsuki? I wanna help you in any way I possibly can...so, if ya really need to get that outta yer system, then you could just, you know…haul off and-”
Satsuki lurched forward, enveloping Ryuko’s tousled head with a gentle embrace. She hugged her close, smoothing out chaotic waves of hair as she whispered an urgent missive to the young girl’s obviously thick skull. “Oh my sweet, beautiful Ryuko-chan, my dearest love...I need you to understand something, okay? We must never allow violence to take hold of our hearts. I have committed a grievous sin against you by allowing rage to dictate my actions, and this has caused me to harm you terribly as a result. This is never to be an acceptable course of action between us, okay? We must strive to be better than...than her. Is this absolutely clear?”
Kiryuin Satsuki felt her heart fill with shards of glass as she glimpsed Ryuko’s eyes fill with hot tears. Lips trembled and pouted as she sniffed and choked on her mumbled answer. “B-but I don’t care what ya d-do to me...I jus’ need ya to stay with me, and never l-leave! Please! I’ll do anything ya want!”
Eyebrows of impressive structure formed an arch of equally impressive concern over her now-worried expression. Satsuki cradled Ryuko’s tear-stained cheeks in her hands, peering directly into the troubled teen’s face. “Ryuko…why are you so concerned about me ‘leaving’ you? Why do you even believe this to be within the realm of possibility? Haven’t I made my own intentions clear by now?”
Withering before the steady intensity of the famous Kiryuin gaze, Ryuko involuntarily shuddered and closed her eyes tightly, the stream of moisture cut off by steel gates. A tremulous whisper managed to escape its lip-locked prison, however. “B-because…everyone I love l-leaves me when I need them the most, that’s why! Dad l-left me. S-Senketsu left me. And I can’t bear the thought of you leaving me, too! M-my heart…it just can’t handle that kind of loss again!”
Eyes flashing open, she startled Satsuki by suddenly bear-hugging her in an iron embrace. “Every time they leave me, a piece of my heart is ripped away…I just can’t survive that again! Please don’t let that happen to me again, Satsuki! I’m begging ya, please, I love you so damned much, and I’m so sorry I’m not a better person and I’m sorry I don’t take yer advice, and I suck at being responsible and I’m dumb, and I just don’t wanna drive you away-Imsoscaredpleasedontleavemealone!”
“Ryuko. Please...look at me.” The quiet yet firm request hung there in the air, and it took Ryuko a few moments to register its presence as something that required action on her part. Gentle digits brushed away matted, tangled red and black foliage to reveal the crumbling monument of beauty that ruled Satsuki’s temple of the soul. Satsuki vowed at this point to take whatever steps necessary to drag this fragile creature back from the brink of irrational fear, no matter the cost.
“Matoi Ryuko. Everything I have ever accomplished in my life…it has been for you, in one way or another. When I didn’t know of you, when you were just an abstract idea? My ultimate focus to succeed, beyond even all my reasons for stopping Mother’s insanity and saving the planet…was to avenge your death. When I actually became aware of your stunningly beautiful presence, however? This is what kept me going, when my gambit had utterly failed and I was certain that I was to perish for my damnable mistakes. You, beautiful girl. You have been, and always will be my guiding light…the spark that drives the engine of my existence. To ‘leave’ you would be to remove my own heart! I could not live without you any more than I could without the heart that beats even now, within my chest!”
Ryuko absorbed this heartfelt speech, processing every last syllable and passing it through her trusty bullshit detector…and the results came back blessedly clear. She slowly allowed a toothy grin to creep over her face; hesitatingly at first, but growing with radiance as she hugged the glorious pillar of grumpy love that was her big, squishy Satsy-kins.
“I hope that never comes to pass, Satsuki. Um…Kiryuins have a nasty habit of having their hearts yanked right outta their damned chests, ya know?” Ryuko chuckled to herself, closed her eyes and nestled her ear over Satsuki’s heart, if only to verify that said heart was still hammering away like a big, stubborn pendulum.
Satsuki performed the fastest puzzled-squint-to-open-eyed-surprise transformation in Honnōji Academy’s history. “Oh, hell. You’re right. I need to choose my imagery more carefully, don’t I? I apologize, Ryuko. I didn’t mean to phrase that so…inappropriately…”
Ryuko’s shoulders shrugged awkwardly, not willing to move from her position above the heart of her love to better illustrate her current attitude. “Aw, fuck it. Our hearts are built to take it all, ain’t they? All the pain in the world ain’t gonna stop mine from beating faster when I think of how awesome you are, in case you wanted to know. You are supremely amazing, okay? I wish I was more like you, Sats…you always have a plan, and the ideas, and all the answers!”
Satsuki sighed, placing a gentle kiss upon Ryuko’s head. “Oh, if only that were so, dear love. All of this chaos could have been avoided altogether if I truly were this wise saint of a person you portray me to be.”
A ticklish snort vibrated its way through Satsuki’s firm bosom, providing by far the strangest sensation she had experienced up to that point in her already-unusual day. “Saintly? Oh, I wouldn’t go that far. I mean…would a saint tie me up tonight and bang me senseless? Preferably bent over on the couch, while I was drunk…?” Ryuko waggled her butt back and forth like a puppy anticipating a stick that was to be thrown for her entertainment…and that actually wasn’t too far away from what was lurking in her mind’s devious eye, anyways.
“A saint might actually do just that, to a sinner like you. You are an unrepentant sex hound these days!”
“Ooh baby, woof-woof, I say…woof-woof!”
“Er…um…M-Matoi?”
“Yeah, Kiryuin?”
“Forgive me for asking…but, this isn’t a…a ‘thing’ of yours, is it?”
“Huh? Whaddaya mean, a ‘thing’?”
“The -ahem- barking references? It’s not a…you know…a fetish of sorts? Are you somehow asking for me to humor you by-”
“Holy-NO, IT IS NOT A FETISH. IT WAS A JOKE.”
“Okay! I’m sorry! I had to be certain! I wasn’t sure if, ah…”
“Doggy style, Satsuki! It’s a pun! I want you to pull my fucking hair and smack my fucking ass while you fuck my naughty pussy from behind on the fucking couch with your fucking strap-on! How the fuck did you even get any other meaning from…oi, you know what? I don’t even want to know. Okay?”
“I-I’m sorry! It’s just that…Inumuta Hōka has these friends, you see…apparently they like t-to dress up as animals? And they…um, they…uh…you know, indulge in various...ah, a-activities that-“
“Satsuki. What the hell. Just…what. The. Hell. Are you even remotely serious, or is this ‘jerk Ryuko’s fucking chain until she gags on it’ day?”
“Ah, well now…that actually sounds like something you would really appreciate, if your recent desires have been any indication?”
“F-fuck you, Kiryuin! That’s your fault for bein’ such a perfectly scary dictator!”
“You...you’re…right.”
“Yeah, well of course I am! Matoi ‘Always Right’ Ryuko...it has a big, shiny ring of glamorous truth to it, don’t ya think? Eh?”
“...yes...”
“Aw...hey? Why the spooky sad face, Sats? I was only kidding, right? I mean, sure...the actual ‘Ninety-Five Percent of the Time Right’ number doesn’t quite roll off the tongue, but...”
Dark clouds fell across the troubled face of the former student council president, her outstretched hands forming upturned claws of quiet frustration. “I fell into my old habit of trying to shut you up by force. A scary dictator’s tactics…again! Would it really have been so terrible to just...tell you how I felt instead? When will I ever learn to react as a normal person would, Ryuko? Why is it so...fucking...hard? I’ve taken great pride in mastering my own emotions...why does this elude me so?”
Ryuko smiled warmly, threading her fingers delicately between Satsuki’s anguished talons and magically transmuted them into warm digits of pliant surrender instead. “Well...maybe because the reign of Kiryuin ‘Perfect and Infallible in Her Lordly Ways’ Satsuki is over? Maybe now that she has finally fulfilled her penultimate duty, it’s time for her to realize this, retire and make way for the Kiryuin ‘Totally Awesome and Super Beautiful But Sometimes Makes Mistakes and That’s Okay’ Satsuki that I adore more than black raspberry ice cream and vanilla vodka combined?”
Satsuki eyes rolled around shyly, searching for the mysterious force that was triggering such burning in her reddening cheeks. “Ha, I don’t think you adore me that much, Ryuko...”
The tip of her tongue poking out in mischievous blips, Ryuko now went and unleashed the full brunt of her glorious ‘Pearly Smile Attack' ( 真珠の笑顔攻撃) that signaled her triumph over Satsuki’s leaden ennui. “I do. In fact, I think that Kiryuin Satsuki could realllly go for some tiramisu ice cream right about now? Huh? I’m buyin’ todaaaay...”
“She...she could possibly go for that, as a matter of fact. Dammit.” That Kiryuin Satsuki sighed in quiet resignation and bit her lip, confessing to a desire that she would normally never even acknowledge if it weren’t for the dossier of insider information that her crafty sister possessed regarding her own illicit (and tasty) cravings.
Matoi Ryuko (ruthless blackmailer of sweet-tooth-stricken siblings everywhere) giggled merrily. “Hey, I’ll even splurge and get you those shitty little stale cookie sticks you love, along with that crappy bitter coffee you drink afterwards!”
“That’s...biscotti, you culinary savage! It’s the perfect complement to a post-dessert cappuccino!” Satsuki blurted, always willing to heedlessly dash headlong to culture’s defense from the heathen masses.
Ryuko’s lips pursed into a stiff upper lip of faux-seriousness. “So, I’ll take it that’s a ‘yes’, madam? I shall fetch the car and proceed to transport milady to the most delightful Café Italiano for a most delightful afternoon dessert treat, hmm?”
The elder Kiryuin’s eyes dropped down briefly, and Ryuko had immediately assumed that more shyness reinforcements had arrived on scene to bully her into submission…but it was the subtle way Satsuki carefully smoothed her palms over her taut abdomen that betrayed the actual gravity of her thoughts to this uncannily observant sister.
“Oi! Don’t you dare be looking at yer tummy! Are you seriously considering bowing out of this because of the frickin’ calories? You better not do that now! We just burned, like, a thousand kilojoules or somethin’ while fighting each other! Your Olympic washboard can handle a small cup of sweetness!” Ryuko menacingly shook her index finger, scolding Satsuki into diet-defying compliance.
“It wouldn’t very well be ‘Olympic’ if I gave in to my every whim! This is the very core of willpower, child…to resist such things!” she chided back.
“Hey, ya know what the difference is between stubbornness and willpower, Sats?”
“Oh, go ahead. State your theory.”
“About three scoops. Get yer ass moving, Kiryuin.”
“All right, all right. After a quick, hot shower. I need the heat, my back is…I mean…I-dammit, I didn’t mean to say that out loud!”
“Hey, easy! Don’t move too fast, or you might make it worse!”
“I’m fine, Matoi! I can get up on my own!”
“Oh yes, I know…but maybe it’ll serve to make me feel better, okay? Now fuck off and let me help you to the goddamned locker room before I put ya in a full body cast!”
“-sigh- I…love you, too.”
“…aw.”
“Oh, and Matoi? I have one favor to ask of you, please?”
“Sure. Name it!”
“I really mean this. It is most important. I absolutely need your most solemn vow.”
“O-okay. I promise…what am I promising here, exactly?”
“Promise me no mercy. In whatever contests we engage in from here on out, no matter the circumstances…please do not go easy on me. I cannot stand the idea of pity, or that you might capitulate to me just to make me feel ‘better’. It would be far more harmful to me if I found that you were pulling your punches. Can you just do me this one favor…out of respect for me?”
“Ha! Oh, fuck! Imma destroy your ass! Like I’d ever lend youmercy…I ain’t got any to give ya! Sorry, I’m allll fresh out. In fact, I replaced it with ass kicking. Want a can of that instead?”
“I’ll take a raincheck on that, regrettably. I am quite spent in just about every way possible.”
“Awww, are ya sure? I think we have this joint rented out fer another…lessee here, about forty-five minutes or so? I could take ya in a quick game of…hell, I dunno…what are the other things listed here…badminton? Whatever the hell that is?”
“Bad-what? Let me see that chart...oh, yes. I see now. It’s an overseas variation on hanetsuki. It’s played with a shuttlecock.”
“A what? A cock? Are ya pulling my chain again?”
“-sigh- No, dear. It’s a…battledore? Usually made of plastic, with frills?”
“-snort- A plastic cock? Oh lord, woman! We came here to play games that neither of us had any experience with to even the playing field, remember? I ain’t goin’ up against you in a game that allows you to use a plastic cock! You’ll just wreck my pelvis with that, too!”
“…and yet you were begging me for this very thing just a little while ago? You will be struggling against a ‘plastic cock’ tonight, dear…and you will lose!”
“Ah…heh-heh-heh, okay, ya got me there. But I really think I’ll actually win in that scenario.”
“Yes, perhaps…if I actually allow you to orgasm!”
“Wha-aaat? Aw, come on!”
“Precisely. Only if you’re good.”
“Oi! In that case-sniff-I-I’ll miss ya, orgasms! It was nice knowing ya! Mean ol’ Lady Satsuki won’t let me have ya anymore!”
“Try being good for once, then?”
“Try being nice for once, then?”
“Oh, well. In that case, at least you had the chance to properly say goodbye.”
“…aw?!”
-
Matoi Ryuko was in pain.
Not from her earlier combat-inflicted injuries, but rather from her current ones.
The pain was one thing. She was used to that, so it didn’t really bother her quite so much. There were ways to mentally block out such things: her legendary stubbornness also went a long way towards achieving her goals, even while in sheer agony.
No, the problem here…was that she was afraid. Fear was always a tough thing to grapple with, icy tendrils burrowing their way through her very being and disturbing her nigh-unshakeable concentration. Her fear here was that she had created an unstoppable monster.
Ryuko panted, huffed, repeatedly blew her unruly hair out of her sweaty face, rocked back and forth ceaselessly, whined, cajoled, begged…absolutely nothing worked to diminish the torture. She was at the mercy of Satsuki’s whims, unsuccessfully defending herself in the midst of the most mercilessly crushing defeat she had ever experienced.
Searing bolts of pain racked her hands. Sizzling pulses of acidic electricity burned through her palms, her thumbs. One barked out yelp after another was emitted from her lungs as she seriously considered crying as a defensive technique, to see if that might possibly get this onslaught to cease…but she was quite certain this would only elicit more cruelty from Kiryuin Satsuki.
The couch shook and creaked with the fury of their activity, and it was only after Ryuko slipped and fell off the edge with a plop did Satsuki finally provide a brief respite from this one-sided slaughter.
The well-worn game controller fell from Ryuko’s grasp, clattering loudly as it skittered across the floor. The young woman stared down at her swollen hands, her heartbeat announcing its fast rhythm within each individual finger in a unified pulse of screams.
“Nee-san, I…I’ve n-never said these words, and I never even dreamed that I would, but…I surrender!” Ryuko’s head hung low, the words tasting unusually bitter and foul. This was not the kind of humiliation she could muster up the courage to swallow.
Satsuki looked away from the Tetris game long enough to dart her eyes over to her sister’s prostrate form, hunched over in front of the couch. She erupted into peals of gleeful laughter, echoing in the game room, the hallway and also Ryuko’s head. “Ha HAAA! You need to do better!”
“If I could, I would! Yer some creepy ass cyborg, some frickin’ Terminator sent from the future to organize goddamned boxes, aren’t ya?” Ryuko grimaced, unsure if her hands or her sibling’s gleeful taunting stung worse right now.
Kiryuin Satsuki beamed a glowing smile of sheer delight straight into the face of her soundly beaten opponent, the glaring intensity of which caused Ryuko to cringe before its maniacal enthusiasm.
“Oh, Matoi! This game is just…pure beauty! It’s brilliant in its sheer simplicity! It makes me happy in a way that I didn’t think was even possible, considering it’s just a silly little video game! Oh, I could play this for the entire day…I’m not even bored yet! I never thought I could find Zen in analyzing and categorizing simple shapes, but…here I am! Thank you so much for introducing me to this fascinating puzzle game!”
“…and to think…that I only wanted to show you to a simple, easy to understand video game…so I could then introduce ya to the concept of digital ass kicking, courtesy of good old ‘Arcade Superthumbs’ Matoi. I didn’t know ya were just a brutal Tetris killing machine! No fair, hiding super powers like that from me, nee-san!” The pouting in Ryuko’s voice was palpable...and Satsuki didn’t give the slightest damn. She was having entirely too much fun kicking her younger sibling’s posterior in her own realm.
“Quiet, please. Distracting me has never worked in the past, and it will not succeed now, either! I have levels to clear, dear.” Ryuko glanced at Satsuki, watching her sister work the controller with a hypnotic precision that denoted her vastly superior processing and prediction skills.
“Auuggghhh…like you even need faster twitch reflexes. What have I done? I’m so gonna regret this…you’re hard enough to deal with, without you literally beating me at my own frickin’ games! I’m gonna have to start referring to ya as my nemesister in real life!”
“Well, Ryuko…you may have to find another activity in the evening. I may just take over this game console for several months!”
“Why bother? It’s on yer damned smart phone, ya methodical maniac!”
“-gasp- It IS? Surely, you jest? Where is it located? Show me, Matoi!”
“-sigh- Calm yer britches…it’s right here, see? I’ll even be nice and merciful and make a shortcut for ya on the main screen. Remember that thing? Mercy? You should try it out sometime...”
“Oh, my. This is certainly interesting. All this time, this fascinating activity has been here, right at my fingertips…and I had no idea!”
Satsuki scrolled over to her text message history and excitingly tapped a quick group message out to her Devas.
‘Attention: I have discovered this game called ‘Tetris’. Has anyone else played this game? It is superb. I highly recommend it! Anyone wishing to challenge me at this game is welcome to do so at this time: I will make the arrangements.’
She turned, brushing off the accumulated sweat on the controller to dive back in to her game, still in progress. A ‘pling!’ sound (coin sound courtesy of ‘Super Mario Game Ringtones’: text alert sounds set up by professional annoyance Matoi Ryuko and obliviously missed by clueless victim Kiryuin Satsuki) came from her phone, signifying a response.
She opened her messages to first observe a text from Jakazure Nonon.
‘Oh shit, you finally discovered Tetris. The world will quake.’
This was followed quickly by Sanageyama Uzu’s reply:
‘NO WAY!I ACCEPT!!!I WILL FINALLY HAVE MY VICTORY!!!!IS TETRIS PLAYED WITH SWORDS???LET ME KNOW!!!’
Inumuta Hōka’s missive was brief.
‘You have never played Tetris? Interesting. I shall make a note of this.’
Iori Shirō’s response then lit up the phone, this one being via e-mail.
“Salutations, Lady Satsuki! The next available time slot in my schedule is two weeks from this Sunday. Let me know if this is a good time for you as well? ~ Sent from my iPhone
Gamagōri Ira’s text came in last.
‘My Lady, I must respectfully decline your invitation at this time. I am currently bound by prior commitments. However, I look forward to engaging you in conversation at a later date!’
This was immediately followed by another message, also from Gamagōri’s number.
“hiiiii satsuki-samaaaaa! this is mankanshoku mako!!!! i hope ira’s message made it to you!!!! i had to let him do the text to speech phone thingy i hope it worked ok???? he cant text now hes been very bad today so i tied him up!!! we miss you satsuki-samaaaaa!!!!! tell ryuko i love her and miss her too!!!!!!! be nice to ryuko!!!!!!!’
Satsuki grinned slightly. “Ah…Mako says that she misses you, Ryuko.”
Ryuko groaned. “Aw. I’d love to text her back, but I think my thumbs are just plain ruined! Maybe next time, we can play something safe and gentle like…like…Monopoly?”
Satsuki chuckled. “Only if I perform the function of banking, Matoi. Considering your woeful management skills, that bank would be shut down by the time I landed on Free Parking!”
A glazed over expression of numbness was all that answered her barbed observation. Ryuko frowned, then glumly muttered to herself “Why am I not surprised that you would be familiar with Monopoly, too?”
Another wry laugh came from Satsuki’s lips. “Why, because I happened to study it in my Finance classes…and because the majority of the lawsuits REVOCS is fighting these days have it as a common theme? Really, Ryuko. How could I not be aware of it?”
Ryuko rolled her eyes and sighed. She mutely watched the screen as Satsuki methodically cleared level after level of Tetris as her own jumbled pile of blocks filled one side of the screen, taunting her with its blinking final score. She noted with a hint of chagrin that her console user name (*Arcade_Superthumbs*) was now quite low on the top ten scores list, her sister’s name (*Nemesister!*) now dominating the first eight slots. She sorely regretted setting that tongue-in-cheek name up for her sibling now; never once thinking Satsuki could ever actually pose a credible threat to her own superior video game wizardry.
“Ya know, fer someone suffering from carpal tunnel, you sure are kicking a huge amount of ass with those thumbs of yours.” Ryuko grumbled, and Satsuki shrugged as her lips pursed with deliberate concentration.
“It hurts, true. I have thus far been able to push past it…but I have been told that surgery will most likely be necessary to address it, since I categorically refuse to wear wrist braces. I am biding my time for the opportunity to…find the time to…” Her voice trailed off as her willingness to finish the uncomfortable thought puttered out.
“Admit it?” Ryuko said nonchalantly.
“I believe I already admitted it to you, Matoi. At the recreational center, remember?”
“I meant more to yourself.”
Satsuki paused her game and gave Ryuko a withering glare. She prepared a scathing retort, but reluctantly shelved it instead. Her ability to ignite another heated argument was doused by the earnest look of concern embedded in her young sibling’s face.
“I’m not entirely crippled, I’ll have you know. I do have a secret…look. In the interest of full disclosure, I suppose I can admit something to you. However, I believe that you may be surprised…and possibly a bit upset at what I have to tell you.”
Ryuko’s eyebrows were the ones to form a bow of surprise this time. “Wh-what are ya talking about now? What else is wrong with ya? Come on, Kiryuin! If this is your idea of a joke, I’ll-“
A raised palm of authoritarian grace silenced the youngster mid-splutter. “Relax. It’s not what you think, I assure you. But it may serve to ease your concerns somewhat over my well-being, all right?”
One jerky shrug of false nonchalance later, and Satsuki finally had the silence she desired. She unpaused her game and proceeded to watch the rain of bricks tumble down as she let loose with her rain of thoughts.
“I may be somewhat ‘superhuman’, after all. The life fibers that were implanted within me as a child did not fully activate to...Mother’s satisfaction, of course...but they never really went away, either. Apparently, they do still influence my physiology in a rather subtle manner. My resilience and stamina are, in Inumuta’s words, ‘legendary’. How else could I defeat over five hundred opponents as a mere youngster, yes?”
Ryuko nodded once, unable to utter any words to describe her current mental state. Her attention was fully devoted to Satsuki’s every word, and she wasn’t about to interrupt with a jackass-like comment now.
“So, while they do not grant me the unbelievable strength and godlike healing properties you possess, they do bolster my performance in other ways. For a human, my staying power is absolute. I can recover from savage hits with near-instantaneous responses. My pain tolerance is stratospheric. It should illustrate just how much damage I incurred when I failed to properly assassinate Ragyo, that fateful day during ‘The Great Culture and Sport Festival’: I should have died that day, Ryuko. She hurled me with the force of a meteor into those concrete stadium steps. My impact left me in a shattered crater, and this was without Junketsu to protect me!”
“Uh huh. I know…I was there…” Ryuko mumbled, wincing at the memories of that tumultuous day.
“Well…any other human would have been crushed into a broken jumble of bone paste by such an incredible impact. But I, Kiryuin Satsuki…was not. I was resilient enough to only suffer a few broken bones, a concussion, some internal bleeding…but I was very much alive. Conscious, even! Well…mostly. I will admit that it was rather touch-and-go during that particular time…I honestly thought I was hallucinating when I heard Mother announce to the world that you were my long-lost sister! It was only later…in that cage, when she used this knowledge to torture me…this was when it finally hit home.”
Ryuko frowned, a sad melancholy look settling over her impish features. “H-hey, Satsuki? Come on…we don’t have to talk about that time, all right? I don’t want it to upset ya!”
Satsuki cocked her head, smirking mysteriously as she did. “Upset? Oh, gods above, no! I play that moment over and over in my head quite frequently. It was the moment that vindicated my entire life, and ultimately sealed Ragyo’s fate in the process. I might have actually given up in that cage, if I hadn’t been provided with the precious knowledge that you were out there, somewhere…my dear sister was alive! If only she knew just how much that bit of intel cost her in the very end!”
Ryuko muttered ruefully “Yeah, these threads…are like having a cheat mode in real life…hey. Look. I...since we’re getting’ all honest and warm and fuzzy here, can I ask you a question?”
Satsuki paused the game, placed her controller down onto the end table and turned to give her sibling her full attention. “You can always come to me for whatever you need. What’s on your mind?”
Ryuko nervously bit her lip, and then stared intently across the room at the video screen, taking sudden interest in the paused Tetris game. It wasn’t staring at her with intensely beautiful blue eyes...and she could meet its LCD gaze right now without issue. “Well...okay. Please, please be honest here. Is part of the reason you resent me because I didn’t have to actually earn what I have? I mean...I have these powers and skills from the life fibers, and I can learn stuff with frightening speed...apparently also because of the life fibers? That, plus I uh...have money now that was basically just given to me...”
Satsuki’s eyes widened with incredulity. “How can you even think...no, of course not! First of all, I don’t resent you in any way! Oh, sure, you irritate me to no end...this I will concede to you, ‘O’ Matoi of Infinite Antagonism’! But I don’t believe for an instant that you haven’t earned all you have. You have suffered tremendously. You have lived through hell and survived! Plus, Father’s estate was rightfully yours, anyways...it wasn’t ‘free money’! Ryuko, you have earned it all...paid in full by copious amounts of blood, sweat, tears and pain!”
Satsuki reached out to Ryuko, gentle hand resting upon tense fist. “Look, I…I’m sorry if you think I’m too hard on you. I don’t know how else to show you…or anyone, for that matter…how much I care? I’m…still trying to find ways that actually work, and it is so very difficult! Please do not believe that I ‘resent’ you. I adore you more than you can possibly imagine, silly girl. You are truly…the very best person I know.”
“Um…I don’t think you know me very well, then. I’m not even smart enough to remember to close the car’s window when it rains half the time…” Ryuko stuttered, blushing now taking up approximately ninety-five percent of her blood supply to power.
“Oh yes, Matoi. That certainly is a metric I use to determine one’s intelligence quotient…I suppose you don’t know me very well either, when seen in that light. Here, wait just one minute. Can you pass me my briefcase? I just remembered a crucial document that I needed to show you. I should have brought it up before. You need to read this…it might bring serious consequences to our lives.”
Ryuko dutifully dragged the briefcase over to Satsuki’s side, which she proceeded to open with a loud -snap- and then rifled through the pockets with grim determination. Locating the folded newspaper, she proceeded to unceremoniously dump it onto Ryuko’s lap.
Examining the newspaper, the young girl cocked her head, then slowly looked at her sister in bewilderment. “It’s a…newspaper? In English? Where’s this even from, and why do you think there’s crap in here I’d even care about?”
Satsuki stiffened, drawing up her poise to full ‘incredibly-grandiose-and-therefore-impossible-to-ignore’ levels. “It was brought to my attention by Soroi. He discovered it during his recent journey to Great Britain. Well, dear…I certainly hope you remember at least a little bit of English from your studies…because the truth of what happened to us is in those pages.”
Ryuko blinked, her open gaping mouth unwittingly threatening to loose forth a spat of drool onto the paper. “Th-the what? The…truth? Like, the actual truth? Y-you cannot possibly be…serious…?”
An impressively manicured nail tapped upon the front page, calling Ryuko’s attention to the contents within. “Read. You will see. Page twenty-six.”
She whipped open the paper, searching frantically for the page numbering. “Uhh, Sats…?” she muttered, and it took Satsuki’s pointing to the numbering to indicate the proper way to open a foreign language periodical. “Oh, crap…I forgot about the backwards page reading thing! Sorry. Okay, lessee here…umm…here! Okay, I found the page! Where am I looking again?”
The nail once again tapped down upon the page in question: an article immediately drew Ryuko’s attention, with a terrible artistic representation of a COVERS soldier looming above the New York City skyline. The title of the article was ‘The Cover-Up Behind The Worldwide REVOCS Wardrobe Malfunctions: ALIENS! Masterminded By Japanese Lesbian Lovers!’.
Ryuko’s eyes bugged out as she slowly read the headline, growing wider and wider as she figured out every word. “Holy…shit. How the fuck did this story get out? A-are we the l-lesbians, Satsuki? Wh-whaaat the fuuuuck are we gonna do? We’ll be arrested! Lynched! Hunted down! Shitshitshit! I’ll be dissected in some secret laboratory!“
Stone faced, Satsuki evenly stated to her not-so-subtly-panicking sister “Please, read the article for the full story. It’s important, Ryuko. Our lives may depend on it!”
Ryuko, now scrunched into a feral ball of quivering nerves, read on as ordered. “Ah…okay…government reports, secret files just discovered…the alien fiber e-experiments…evil l-living fibers…masterminded by…REVOCS Head CEO Ragyo Kiryuin and Rei Hoomaroo? What the everliving hell? A-and they didn’t even spell Hōōmaru correctly? The two evil fabric industry leaders...disappeared together in the resulting chaos to live as lovers on the MOON?!”
Papers shredding nearly fast enough to ignite from friction alone, Ryuko gnashed her teeth and screamed out “What…the…hell is the meaning of this, Kiryuin Satsukiiii!” Her hyperventilating lungs sucked fire as she turned to her inhumanly calm sibling, who remained motionless upon the couch. Ryuko fixated a laser of burning conviction upon Satsuki’s alabaster visage, hoping to extract the truth from sheer attitude alone.
“It means, dear Ryuko…that my poker face has improved.” The slightest twitch of her delicate nostrils, flaring ever so slightly…this was enough to reveal the consummate practical joker’s sly gamble.
If lasers could, in fact, erupt from Ryuko’s enraged pupils right then, it would have unleashed a Tunguska-level event of pure fury, aimed at her sister’s immolated corpse. The only thing that short-circuited the cyclotron of boiling rage that was rapidly accelerating within her humiliated bosom was the utterly alien sight of Kiryuin Satsuki…exploding into torrents of cackling mirth.
“Aaaahhhhh! Ah ha ha ha ahhhhhaaaa! Oh, you s-should see your f-f-face right now, Ryuko-ho-ho-ho-hoooo!” Satsuki fell to the floor limply, rolling into a laughing ball of jiggling, snorting and tears.
Ryuko pouted the mightiest pout ever witnessed by human eyes. The angle of her jutting jaw, the curve of her fumbling lips, eyes sparkling with perfectly suckered shame…a master sculptor could not have crafted a better monument to abject silliness as was currently before Satsuki’s teary vision. Her deep chuckles had just started to settle down to a somewhat understandable rumble when Ryuko went ahead and sniffled with a mournful cry “That…that so wasn’t funny, nee-san!”
This triggered a secondary explosion of gleeful shrieking, Satsuki’s sides stabbing her in an effort to cease the trauma to their overworked ribs. Ryuko watched her sister jerk and spasm on the floor in paroxysms of delightful mirth…and a faint smirk slowly crept up and took control of her face when her steel-meltingly furious grimace wasn’t looking.
Satsuki coughed and gasped, with a random snicker occasionally rippling through her frame as she slowly crawled back up to a sitting position on the couch. She panted as she wiped trace moisture from the corners of her eyes. “S-sometimes a serious expression is actually h-hard to manage, even for me! I couldn’t resist, Matoi. When Soroi showed me that tabloid, I just…oh, the possibilities were endless!”
“H-hard to manage? So is eating through a straw, you infuriating bitch! So that paper is just…just a-“
“An American shūkanshi, nothing more. You need not worry, dear Ryuko. We are blessedly safe from the world’s wrath.”
“Oh, yeah? You might not be safe from mine!”
“I will accept any punishment you feel is necessary. I regret nothing. It was worth it…to s-see your f-f-f-face! Oh, ow! Oh, it h-hurts to l-laugh! Owww…ohhh…!””
“Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up. I’ll get you back, Kiryuin! I swear!”
“You are welcome to try, dear heart. I wish you the very best of luck! You’ll need it, to top that!”
“Well, whatever. Besides…I’m not a lesbian.”
“O-oh, really?”
“Nope! I like guys, too.”
“Oh…do you, now?”
“Well, yeah…a little bit…”
“I see. Am I keeping you away from all the eligible men, then? Shall I make arrangements for some marriage interviews, hmm?”
“Uhh…”
“Why, I know of some lovely miai services! I can call them up and ask for them to set you up with…what is your type of man, Ryuko? Hmm?“
“Okay, you can stop that now.”
“Oh, I know! A man who prefers his woman on the fiery, attitudinal side! Surely a man who is up to a real challenge!”
“Quit it, Sats.”
“Or possibly a wealthy businessman! You could just stay at home and be lazy…why, you wouldn’t even have to change much about your-“
“Satsuki! Shut the FUCK UP! The only man I could love is DEAD!”
“I…Ryuko. I’m…so sorry. I…”
“Yeah, whatever. Fuck this noise. I’m gone.”
“Ryuko, no! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up Senket-“
“Well, ya did. I gotta go. Like, now.”
“O-okay. I understand. Please…be careful!”
“-snort- Oh, like I’m ever that.”
“Ryuko, I lov-“
The door slammed, reverberating throughout the mansion’s structure. Satsuki was left alone to stare bleakly at her Tetris game…which she failed to notice had somehow become unpaused, a jumbled pile of chaos now filling up her side of the screen to mirror Ryuko’s. Her high score now flashed upon the peak of the top ten scores list, but she didn’t feel the slightest bit of triumph at this hollow victory.
-