Petting Zoo
In Magical Animal Care and Basic Zoology, an elective that Morty had signed up for out of nostalgic reminicents of Ol' Hagrid, and, more importantly, because Blueblood positively refused to take any sort of class that might get his mane and pelt adversely messy.
The ponified immortal sat in a tasteful grove that straddled the Royal Gardens attending said class for the past few months now and was bored out of his fuzzy skull. At least Hagrid's classes had been exciting (well except that one flobbereorm class).
Currently, some of his brain power was dedicated to pondering the origins of the mystery not-meat of his upcoming lunch as he waited his turn in presenting his assignment, the purpose of which was to spend a semester rearing an animal of choice, and then present thier animal with a prepared speech at the end of the semester.
Beside him was a crate twice his size filled with ominous gurgling and the occasional plopping hiss. A bright fuchsia FRAGILE decorated the front, and it cast an ominous shadow over a box of begal puppies sitting beside the plum purple unicorn in front of him.
To his right was Shining Armour, and beside him was a perch which sat a particularly fat macaw that he had borrowed from his uncle out of desperation.
His previous projects, FinFin the Goldfish was lost to the eons of Equestrian plumbing and Fluffyboots the orangutan was a casualty of FinFin's I-Know-What-You-Did-Last-Summer style return and revenge.
This was not Shining Armour's particular calling.
Fortunately, Commander Poofy was a self sufficient bird at least, and spent most of his time perched well out of the way of Shinning Armour, and the grim air about his feathers of a survivor as he brushed the shrunken squirrel head talisman around his neck.
Harry's current project growled ominously from its crate, as impatient as Harry to get the snorefest over with.
"Er...Morty, how about we have you next?" Tailchaser, an elderly pink palimino unicorn stallion, said with a distinctly nervous air.
Morty shrugged, levitating his now shaking and smoking crate to the front.
His classmates grabbed respective pets, slower fellow students, and nearby valuables as they dove for cover behind desks. Tailchaser grimley levitated a hard hat with a protective face cover over his head.
"Alright, lets have it," The teacher said resignedly.
Morty shrugged and tipped the crate over.
Out hopped a fluffy russet colored bunny rabbit. It let out a tiny, mewly growl.
"This is Buckbeak the Second," Morty began, "called by the locals of Winnypeg the Fluffy-Destroyer-of-Villages, and is considered to be the most adorable species on the planet..."
"Awww! its so cute!" one Filly gushed.
"Look at its big eyes! awwww!" another Foal exclaimed.
"My, My Young foal, what a handsome species of rabbit, I don't think I've seen this variant before?" exclaimed Tailchaser, lifting the protective cover, "whereever did you find this creature?"
"An...aquantince of mine suggested it and I found this really shady minotaur in a pub who happened to have one. Was quite relieved too. Not that I can blame him of course, given its reputation. Now, the food schedule was the hard part, finding enough carrion was the tricky bit but..."
Morty sighed when immediatly there was a que to pat the adorable ball of fluff who cooed at the gathering ponies.
"Urm, you might want to give him some space folks, its giveing off its warning coo, similer to a rattlesnake, which it interestedly shares a common ancestor with the Fluffy-Destroyer-of-Villages..."
"Aww but look at it!" Candence exclaimed, reaching out a hoof, "its cooing and purring! I bet it would love a tiny little tummy rub..."
Candence's hoof was suddenly grabbed in an aura of dark tinged magic.
"Tummy rubs are instant death," Morty warned her blandly.
The cooing and puring suddenly hitched up in volume until it was a high pitched chittering hum that filled the room, hurting pony ears, shattering glass, and making animals screech and howl in terror as they frantically began to flee.
The tiny velveteen face suddenly split along the edges falling half away to reveal hundreads of needle sharp teeth dripping venom that pock marked the floor in tiny acid holes. The fluffy fur retracted into its swelling body to be replaced by razor sharp quills, and it had grown to 10 times its size, now twice as tall as an average pony.
"Now, as I was saying," Morty continued as his classmates began screaming and diving for cover or escape, "the Fluffy-Destroyer-of-Villages, while also the cutest animals on the planet, at least according to the locals in saddle Arabia, are also reputated to be the most destructive due in part to thier bad tempers when threatened or hungrey. Destroying large swaths of land in rageing infernos when particularly peaked..."
"Infernos?!" exclaimed Tailchaser in a near faint.
FWOOOSH!
"Yes indeed," Morty continued his rehearsed speech, "thier quills contain a chemical that catches on fire when released into oxygenated air."
Morty didn't get a chance to finish his rather informative speech as everyone ran out the door or dived out of windows in sheer terror.
Later that evening Princess Celestia paid Morty a visit and suggested that perhaps Buckbeak the second might be happier back in its natural environment. Morty had to admit that, while he was fond of his first attempt at a pet since his dearly departed Hedwig, Buckbeak was a bit of a challenge. He was at school all day while Buckbeak was stuck in his room, and while he was just a baby, he was going to get to big to his crate soon enough. He deserved open terrain to bound through.
When Buckbeak was safefly shipped off to his new home, an uninhabited valley outside Saddle Arabia, (Winnypeg having a kill on site law with the adorable puffs of doom), Morty was called into a meeting with several faculty heads.
He later informed His friend that he was transffered to a new elective, the faculty feeling that his...talents would benefit from a semester in Downhill skiing. A surrpisingly small class that he had not heard of before, weirdly enough, consisting of Princess Celestia as instructor, Blueblood, Cadence, and the ever loyal Shining Armor, who'd been informed through a similar summons. He'd never heard of the class before, nor had he expected a royal to be a gym teacher.
When he had pointed this out to the gathered heads of staff, they had all shared quick eyeflicks before the headmare grunted.
"Its just been created, a trial run to see how unicorn magic can be adapted into winter sports."
"I don't know," Morty had mused, "I mean, my current elective is almost over. Another month or two and I'll have the mark I need for this semester anyway..."
"We despratley need strong healthy canditates for the program," Carrot Top, the master of the Drama and Theatre department added hurriedly.
Tailchaser suddenly flung himself before the bemused young pony and exclaimed "Please, please, PLEASE say you will accept! I swear its an instant pass! high marks! For you and those whom were part of the classs and your friends who were part of the class! I beg you!"
'Wow,' Morty had thought, and later shared with Shinning Armour, who'd had a similer idea about their transfer, 'they must be really hard up for students to take this class. I suppose it wouldn't hurt, and Shining Armor could definitely use the mark the way things have been going.'
Morty had agreed, bemused by the tears in Prof. Tailchaser's eyes, the tearful embraces shared among the staff was perhaps a tad excessive for some random sports class in his opinion.