Chapter 10
After ensuring Clarke had returned to resting, Lexa exited the tent despite wishing to remain and return to her position of sleeping with the blonde, and pretending their conversation with Titus had never happened. But it was not to be, because the Commander had duties whether she wanted to do them or not. All she had to do was make her rounds, avoid Titus as though he had caught the Skykru illness, and act like everything was fine. Then she could return to Clarke and the comfort she brought with her presence. Breathing deeply, she forcefully calmed herself. She could do this. If she knew how to do one thing, it was how to compartmentalize. Straightening, she strode through the camp, hoping to every spirit above that she looked as though nothing was wrong.
Making her way over to Nyco’s healing station, she waited for the man to finish with his current patient, a young Skykru girl, Harper, she recalled. One of the Skykru from the Mountain. Despite having never spoken, Lexa had made it her mission to know the name to every face that she had abandoned within the walls of Mount Weather, if only just to punish herself more for her betrayal of not only Clarke but the children she had betrayed as well. Feeling slightly self conscious, Lexa made sure to position herself behind the younger girl, so as not to be seen. She knew that if girl showed her anger to her now, in public, the brunette might not be able to keep her composure.
She waited until Nyco had smiled at Harper, packed up his kit, and sent the younger girl on her way before approaching. This would only take a few minutes hopefully.
“Nyco, how are the Skykru?”
The healer turned his head to her, acknowledging her presence before setting up his table to create medicine. Vials filled with water, and bowls of ground herbs and roots lay messily organized in groups on its surface.
“They are doing better, Heda. Other than the first few, unavoidable deaths, there have been no casualties, although some of the guards have come down with a milder version of the illness, but they are in no danger due to having been exposed during childhood.”
The news brightened Lexa’s spirits ever so slightly. The Skykru would be alright.
“Clarke will be glad to hear it.”
Nyco nodded, turning his attention away from the concoction he was making.
“How is the Sky Princess? No one has really been over to check on her.”
His concern was that of a healer, always worrying for his patients.
“She is better as well. She has take all the medicine that you gave me. Her fever is gone, and she has begun to walk around the tent. Although she does get tired quickly.”
The older healer nodded, returning to his work now that his worry was laid to rest.
“That is to be expected, another few days, maybe a week and she will be almost as healthy as if she had never been sick. However, it is best if she rests in that time. No strenuous activity of the physical or emotional sort. In the long run, it will help her recover faster.”
Lexa nodded her understanding. She would try her best to make Clarke rest, but the blonde was stubborn and had the tendency to get her way whether Lexa liked it or not.
“Thank you, Nyco. I will try to ensure she rests.”
Smiling after his Heda as she left, the large man returned to his work. Only a few minutes later, just after checking in with the leader of the guard shift, she ran nearly ran into Lincoln, literally. The man had large deer slung over his shoulder, blood dripping from a skillful arrow wound to its neck. She had nearly collided with him as she turned the corner leading to the hunter’s tent.
“Lincoln, I see you have been hard at work. Good kill.”
Lincoln bowed awkwardly under the weight of the corpse.
“Thank you, Heda, but the kill was not mine. It was Miller, one of the young Skykru.”
Yes, she knew of Miller. Another that she had abandoned at the Mountain. She was surprised that he was up and about, let alone helping already.
“Come, let me help you.”
She helped him remove the load from his shoulders, and they both carried the large animal over to the skinning station, conversing all the while.
“I am surprised that the Skykru are well enough to leave the camp. Should I be concerned?”
The dark skinned man shook his head.
“No, Heda. We are only allowing those that have been cleared by Nyco to come, and only if they are willing to help. A few, mostly the younger Skykru, wish to assist. Many of the elders are wary to leave the camp, however.”
Lexa nodded her head in approval. The mixing of the populations of Arkadia and her warriors in a cooperative setting was good. Hopefully it would lead to more cooperation in the future.
“Thank you, Lincoln. You have been very helpful with the recovery effort.”
And he had. Many hunters had reported the man helping around the camp, organizing the cooperation between the Coalition Warriors and the Skykru, as well as in general being one of the most helpful. Of course by going outside of the camp, he was disobeying the Kill Order, but considering the amount of work to be done, no one had overly cared so long as he remained useful. And with that thought, an idea came to Lexa.
“Once this is over, Lincoln, should you continue to be as helpful as you have been, I will lift your Kill Order.”
Lincoln paused as he set down his half of the deer. They had arrived at the skinning tent. There were several tables, some covered in animal remains yet to be cleaned, while others were barren, waiting for a new kill. On one of these tables, they set down the large corpse.
“Are you certain, Heda? I did commit treason after all.”
Lexa felt the urge to laugh bubble in her chest. He was trying to make sure she was not joking, but it sounded as though he were trying to make her keep the Kill Order on him.
“I am certain. You committed treason for the one you loved, and now you are trying to bring the Skykru and the Coalition closer together. Should you continue on this path, I believe you will have earned your life back, don’t you?”
Lincoln stuttered, too overwhelmed to reply. She could see that he was happy with the prospect of being able to return to his people. Adjusting the deer so it would not fall off the table, she turned her focus to the initial reason why she had come to find one of the hunters.
“How is the hunting going? Is enough being gathered to feed everyone?”
Lincoln straightened and shook himself out of his stupor. Her change in tone signaled her desire for an official report of the food gathering activities.
“Thus far, yes, but as people recover and can stomach more food we may have some small problems in the transition period where the majority is strong enough to eat, but not strong enough to help. There is also the concern of the coming Winter. They have food stored, but it is bland. To be honest it’s more like field rations if anything.”
Lexa fought the urge to shudder. While field rations were very healthy and easily kept and stored, they were only used on long missions where taking fresh food was not an option. They tasted gritty and dry, and were the bane of every warrior’s existence, bar the enemy, of course. When assigned to a mission, every warrior prayed to the spirits that they wouldn’t have to suffer through such a horrible meal.
“Were those the Skykru’s primary food supply in the sky?”
She hoped that it wasn’t. She dreaded eating such things for even one meal. She couldn’t even imagine eating it for her entire life. Even if they weren’t the staple food of the Skykru, Lexa silently vowed to make sure Clarke never had to touch the rancid things ever again, even if she had to hunt for the blonde herself.
“According to Octavia, it was. Now that they have tasted our food however, many do not wish to eat it.”
It was understandable. Rations truly were disgusting. It seemed they would have to help the Skykru further. Lexa paused. The leaders within the Coalition would not take kindly to simply giving resource to the Skykru. She swallowed harshly. Another problem to add to the ever growing pile. The web of politics that stretched out before her was tangled and never ending. Feelings of anxiety prickled at the back of her mind, an uncomfortable feeling that matched the situation. Bidding Lincoln fair well, she left with a frown tugging at her lips.
Lexa continued through the camp, the new information swirling in her mind as she checked in with every important tent. Just as she was finishing discussing the need of another shipment of spices with the cook tent, Lexa caught sight of Abby. The older woman was seated at a work table set up for healers. She was grinding herbs dutifully as she chatted with other healers. She seemed happy, or content at the very least. Walking over, gained the elder Griffins attention.
“Abby, I see you are well.”
She tried to remain as civil as possible, considering their last encounter. Abby turned to her, slight surprise painting her features, but she quickly schooled her expression to one of business.
“Commander. How is my daughter?”
Of course she would want to know about her daughter. Hopefully her face remained impassive as she responded.
“Clarke is well. She has started to move around the tent, and soon I expect that she will be able to wander around camp. If you would like, I can tell her that you wish to see her once she is up and about?”
She wanted Abby to see that she had no intention of keeping her from her daughter, and what better way than helping bring them together. If the new round of surprise on the older woman’s features was anything to go by, it seemed Lexa had succeeded in convincing her.
“Thank you, I would like that. Also, I have that list you wanted.”
Abby’s features softened then hardened again as she got down to business. Lexa moved closer as the healer lowered her voice. At least she understood the need for discretion.
“They are the ones that massacred your people.”
The former Chancellor handed over a rolled piece of parchment, making Lexa smile solemnly. If the names on this list were truly the perpetrators, then this could be the start of mutually beneficial alliance, although she would have Indra confirm that they were indeed the ones responsible.
“Thank you, Abby. With these, I hope to put SKykru in a position to become a supported member of the Coalition.”
Abby nodded, looking slightly uncertain. Obviously, the healer still had reservations about the Coalition, but had the sense not to argue.
“I just want my people to be safe, happy and fed, and it seems this is now our only option for that to happen. I hope we work well together, Commander.”
The older woman offered her arm to shake. Clasping her hand around the healer’s forearm, Lexa shook firmly, a small happy smile creeping onto her face. Even with the former Chancellors reservations, this was progress.
“Thank you again, Abby. I do truly want there to be peace between our people.”
Releasing the older woman’s arm, Lexa straightened.
“I will tell Clarke of you’re wish to meet with her as soon as I see her.”
Abby nodded her understanding and turned back to her work. Looking quickly up at the sun, Lexa noted it was much to early for the afternoon meal, leaving her plenty of time to just spend with Clarke and speak with her about the slowly declining situation. Despite the impending conversation, a slight buzz of happiness hummed in her chest. Just the thought of blonde leader always seemed to have that affect on the young Commander. With quick steps, she travelled towards their shared tent, hoping that nothing else would arise to distract her.
However, her small spark of hope was soon brought to a grisly end as Titus stepped out into the path in front of her. She could feel her face fall into its normally stoic expression, and the anger, disappointment and frustration came flooding back in a giant wave. Gritting her teeth, she continued forward. It would do no good to avoid him, and create a tense situation that didn’t need to happen if she did so obviously.
She continued down the path towards the tent, Titus falling in step beside her. Where normally his presence would bring a sense of calm and comfort, it now brought an irritation and tenseness she had no desire to have. She had hoped to stay away for as long as possible until her emotions had calmed down once again and she was ready to seek him out herself, but it seemed it was not to be. The least she could do now would be to remain civil.
“Titus, have you brought news of Jaha?”
She continued looking forward, avoiding his gaze. She knew that if she looked at him, all her anger and rage from this morning would come rushing back. A shiver ran down her spin as she recalled his blatant disrespect and disobedience to the law. She resisted the urge to strike him for his insolence.
“I have not. I have come to speak with you about another matter which concerns me.”
Stopping between two Skykru buildings, she turned to look at him, eyes cold and muscles tense. She could hear the baying of horses from one of the buildings; enough noise that it would give them some privacy to speak as they pleased. Her eyes hovered somewhere over his shoulder, observing the fine twists and knots in the wood of the wall behind him.
“So speak, Titus.”
She could feel her anger boil, and apparently so could he, as he took a step back in the face of her rage.
“I wish to speak with you about Clarke. I have inquired with a few of the warriors and am concerned at how close you to are becoming. I fear that should you continue down this path, she will become another Costia.”
Lexa felt a sudden, cold calm. Her jaw tightened, but the rest of her muscles relaxed. Squaring her shoulders, she looked him right in the eye for the first time during their entire conversation. She could clearly see his face drop as his mind thought that he may have possibly over stepped. He had.
“Not only do you ignore my order to interrogate Jaha, you go around prying into my personal business.”
She paused, drawing in a deep breath in a futile attempt to calm herself.
“I am going to say this once, so you had better listen well, Flamekeeper. Clarke will not be another Costia, and do you know why? Because not only is Nia dead, so is the Mountain. Arkadia is under my protection because it is now under Coalition control, and another conflict happening so soon is unlikely due to having proven my strength as Commander in the duel with Roan. All of my immediate enemies are defeated, and there are none on the foreseeable horizon.”
She paused again to allow the older man to digest this information before plowing on.
“I have proven myself and sacrificed myself for the good of my people for so long, and now that true lasting peace is within my grasp, I believe I deserve to find my own happiness.”
She stopped, suddenly drained of the righteous fury that had been fueling her tirade that she hissed through her teeth. Worrying her lip, she glanced away feeling weak.
“Why can’t you see that Clarke is a part of that?”
Quickly, not wanting to hear his response, she left him where he stood, speechless. Knowing her normally iron grasp on her emotions was slowly cracking, she hurried to her tent, feeling the overwhelming desire for the comfort of the blonde within. Without any of her usual care or grace, she threw open the tent flaps, not caring if they fell back into place properly. She clawed at the leather ties of her boots, cursing the well tied knots as they refused to come undone. So engrossed with her task and blinded by her emotions, she didn’t notice the blonde that had entered the main room.
“Lexa? Are you alright?”
At the sound of Clarke’s voice, she stopped, balancing on one leg, mid-attempt to yank off her stubborn boot. She swallowed thickly before answering.
“I’m fine.”
Her voice cracked, betraying her inner turmoil. Clarke’s face softened at the obvious lie, padding across the tent, she helped the struggling brunette with her boots. They came off quickly with the help of a second calmer pair of hands. Her jacket was removed as well, draped across its usual chair for later use. Gentle hands guided Lexa to the sleeping area, leading and pulling until she was laying on top of Clarke, although this time her head lay delicately on the blonde’s shoulder, tucked into the curve of her neck. Soothing fingers brushed through brown locks, untangling knots and snarls as they went.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
The question is asked quietly, not filled with curiosity, but with concern. Lexa worked her jaw for a moment, unsure of what to say. With a sigh, she decided it was best to just tell her everything, from talking with Nyco, to the soon to be shortage of food, to her confrontation with Titus, and so she did. Relaying every detail and word that she could remember, along with the message that Abby wanted to give to her. Clarke stayed silent through it all, listening intently and never stopping the slow strokes of her fingers on Lexa’s scalp.
Once finished, the blonde remained silent, contemplating the new information. Finally, after a few solid minutes, she replied.
“I understand he cares for your wellbeing, but I hope he doesn’t do anything drastic, as it seems to be a trend with him.”
Lexa swallowed, her blood turning cold. Titus has had the tendency to do things that were “questionable” for her safety. Such as torture a Skykru thief without a trial or consultation. Subconsciously, she had wrapped her arms around the girl beneath her. She hugged tightly, fear seizing her muscles. She knew that should another person she loved be taken from her, she wouldn’t survive it. She had hoped Titus knew that as well, but now she wasn’t so sure. Feeling Lexa’s arms tighten, Clarke continued her ministrations, scratching lightly on the older girl’s scalp.
“For now, we should rest. We still have some time before any situations become severe, so we can wait a little while longer.”
The brunette hummed in agreement, eyes drooping from emotional exhaustion. Burrowing further into the blonde’s embrace, Lexa vowed to confront Titus about his actions. He had to understand that, should he harm her, he would never be forgiven. The Commander had to make him understand that, should Clarke die, it would destroy her, utterly and completely