The Idea

It had been three years since the pair had first met, and neither of them had thought that life would turn out this way.
Flashback to 2013 in Chicago, Illinois:

Ella was climbing the stairs juggling what seemed like a mountain of boxes, her roommates were moving in, and Ella being the nice person she was, had offered to help. Pre-season was about to start for the inaugural season of the NWSL. Ella knew Chicago well, having previously played there, and being an Illinois native. Ella, wearing her “savage” cut off, showing off her arms, was staggering, barely able to see over the boxes she was carrying, this was just another time that being only 5”5 really wasn’t helpful in life. Eventually, after a struggle, Ella made it to her new apartment carrying Lori’s boxes and dumped them in the middle of the room.

“Lori you owe me for this one” Ella said before looking up, “oh erm hey” stuttered Ella as she saw two new faces standing in front of her. She recognised both of the girls, but couldn’t quite place their names. “I am Ella, You must be the Canadians?” Ella knew that there were due to be some Canadians moving into the apartment directly behind the one she was due to live in with Taryn and Lori.

“Indeed, how did you guess?” replied the dark haired girl.

“The Canadian tuxedo was a giveaway” replied the American

“Erin, I told you not to wear that. Anyway, I’m Carmelina, but you can call me Carm, and that, that’s Erin. Nice to meet you” the curly haired girl said.

“Yes nice to meet you, and Carm there is nothing wrong with my fashion choices.” Erin said whilst trying to convert her attention from the American whom she had been staring at goofily since she walked in.

Little paws could be heard running across the wooden floor of the apartment, “and that’s Max” stated Erin, before the little Chihuahua started pawing at Ella’s leg.
“hello little man” Ella said leaning down to fuss the dog, who rolled onto his back, enjoying the new found attention he was receiving.

“What is happening?” asked Carm, “Max hates new people, it took him forever to even come near me, and I’m still not sure if he likes me yet.

‘It’s a sign’ Erin thought to herself silently. Carm was right, in the whole time Erin had had Max, he had never responded to someone so well on their first meet. He was just about okay with the national team players now, but it had taken him a while. In all honesty, she was really glad that Max had taken so well to Ella, and hoped that he would be something that the pair could bond over. Erin had never been one to believe in love at first sight, but she definitely felt a connection to the girl she had only met 5 minutes ago. ‘damn, she is beautiful, I mean the cut off would have to go, but she is stunning’ Erin was now looking the girl up and down. ‘how can someone look so beautiful in a cut off and soccer shorts?” Erin pondered.

“Erin are you coming?” asked Carm

“Hmm what?”

“Seriously dude, Ella has just offered to help move all of our things from the car. Were you not listening?”

“Oh erm sure thanks Ella” no, Erin hadn’t been listening, she took a step back. How long had she just been staring at the girl. Had Ella noticed her staring? She certainly hoped not.

“Be back in a min T” Ella shouted to her roommate who was unpacking in her room”

“Sure whatever” replied Taryn.

Whilst walking down the stairs, the three girls started to talk about the national team, and how well the Canadians had done at the Olympics. That’s when it hit her. ‘Erin Mcleod, she’s the goalkeeper who got the indirect free-kick given against her”

Ella had remembered watching the match. She remembered the game at Old Trafford, the theatre of dreams, and how unlucky the Canadians had been. Truthfully, she had wanted the USWNT to win, because she was a proud American, who knew a lot of the girls well, having played alongside them previously.

“I’ve never seen that decision given before, you guys were unlucky” Ella was referring to the decision for the indirect kick that was given against Erin with no warning, for apparent time wasting. And it was true, Ella hadn’t seen that decision without warning before or since the match.

“It was tough, but these girls helped me pull through” Erin nodded towards Carm, “they could have easily blamed me, but instead they lifted my head up, and we focused on the bronze medal match, and that’s the Power of Love” Erin was joking in reference to the song the Canadian team listened to and sang after every game in the locker room. On some occasions, videos had been posted of the team singing, and it was a well-known fact that ‘Power of Love’ was the Canadian Women’s National Teams favorite song.

The next hour or two consisted of Ella helping the Canadians move all their things into their apartment. She appreciated how hard it was to move to a new city, let alone a new country. Luckily, the two girls new each other well, after playing together on the national team for so many years, and at college. They had roomed together for 3 years or so, and known each other for about 12, so it was like moving in with family.

“Anyways, ill let you two unpack, if you need anything you know where I am” Ella stated as she walked towards the door.

“Thanks” replied the two girls in unison. Carm waited until Ella had left before she began to talk to Erin. She could tell that Erin was attracted to the girl, she had seen that face before.

“Erin, think about it before you do anything…” Carm warned carmly.

“What are you on about?”

“Ella, I can tell that you like her. But please don’t do anything. You know how hard it is to date a teammate, and plus I heard she’s a staunch Christian, and thinks it’s a sin”. It was unknown really if Erin had ever dated a teammate before, but it was rumoured, and assumed that for a period of time in around 2012, Erin and Tanc had dated. Neither of them had confirmed anything, but it was clear by the way they looked at each other, kind of the same way Erin had been looking at Ella ever since they met.

“Carm, I got this, don’t you worry” Erin trailed off, as she went into her room to unpack all of her clothes.

~ella’s Apartment~
Ella had headed straight into her room when she had left the Canadian’s apartment. She had moved in the day before, so her room was kind of sorted, but there were a few things left to do, such as to put up a few shelves for her books. Ella had picked up her bible, and began to read.

It was true, the girl was a Christian, and she had been since she had met her ex-boyfriend in high school. Before she met her ex, Ella had never really thought about faith, her family wasn’t particularly religious, and they had been through a lot. If anything, Ella believed that Soccer was her religion. But, her ex had soon introduced her to faith, he was the son of the pastor, and it was only natural that faith was a big part of his life.

Ella had been 16 when she first picked up a bible. It brought her a lot of comfort, in a way that she had never felt before, nor had she expected. She learned about Jesus, and all that He did, how He died for other’s sins. From then, Ella had been baptised, and held religion strong in her heart.

Ella was flicking through her bible, trying to understand what had just happened. She had felt an instant attraction to the goalkeeper, in a way that she never had before. But, this was a girl, she had never fallen for a girl before, she wasn’t supposed to fall for a girl was she? It was a sin after all. Ella had followed the bible as strictly as she could for years, even writing blogs about how homosexual relationships were a sin, but now she was attracted to a member of the same sex.

Ella was fighting an internal battle in her heart, she couldn’t deny what she felt. She felt guilty, a weight had been placed on her shoulders. She didn’t want to go against God, she wanted to be a good servant to Him, she wanted to go to heaven, not to hell for sinning.

Ella lay on her bed staring at her bible, for what seemed like an eternity. In a way, she was hoping to find something that confirmed, that to love another woman would be sinning. She had read the bible before, hundreds of times. She knew where to look for comfort, and for some reason today, her hand flicked through the pages until she got to the verses she wanted to read.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 1 Corinthians 4-7

Ella took this as a sign, she knew in her heart that to love another woman, would be sinning, but she also knew that God was watching over her, and loving her. She knew that she had been put on this planet for a reason, and that God was guiding her through life. Ella read the verses 10 times over. She knew that this was just God’s way of telling her to go for it, to do all things through love, and that most importantly, God would not abandon her for loving someone- as long as she did it whole heartedly.

Ella knew that it was going to be a long road ahead, and she didn’t want to tell Erin how she felt, especially not before the season started. What would happen if Erin didn’t like her back? That would make for an awkward season. She knew that most importantly, she had to get to know the girl first. Yes, she appreciated the goal keeper’s looks, but she needed to get to know the person on the inside before making any rash decisions.

Ella knew that she wold probably feel guilty about what she felt for a long time, and she knew that she had to work through this guilt, and try and release the weight from her shoulders before she even told Erin how she felt.

Ella decided that she was going to keep it to herself for at least a few months. She wouldn’t tell anyone, especially not her best friend Em, because after all Emily was on the Canadian team too, and she knew that Em would tell Carm and Carm would tell Erin. No, she had to keep this to herself.