May We Meet Again
APRIL 20, 2010
“No no no! Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit!”
The brunette girl looked frantic and wild as she ran for cover from the rain in the train station. Mumbling a slew of curses, she runs into a blonde. Literally runs into her. And their eyes meet. Blue and green.
“Shit”
Only this time Lexa isn’t cursing about missing her train. She’s cursing herself for running into a beautiful blonde while she surely looked like she was just a few minutes from a complete breakdown.
“Did you miss your train too or do you normally just mumble curses as you walk?”
“The latter. Do you know when the next train to the city is by any chance?”
“Not until morning I’m afraid.”
“Shit”
“I’m starting to think ‘shit’ is your favorite word.”
“After the day I’ve had maybe it is.”
“Sounds like there’s a story behind that.”
“There is. Just not one I’m comfortable sharing with a beautiful blonde stranger.”
Lexa’s eyes widen. It seems that everything she is thinking today is just flying out of her mouth. Just as she’s about to run away and cower in the corner for her uncharacteristic boldness, the blonde’s eyes soften and she chuckles.
“Well aren’t you forward. I’m Clarke. I’m 19 years old. An artist. I love to jog at night because it’s the only time I feel at peace when I’m not painting or sculpting. I’m allergic to kiwi. If you ever want to get in my good graces, buy me a pint of pistachio gelato. I could keep going but I don’t want to overload you with information.”
Lexa’s confused for obvious reasons. Why was this girl telling her a bunch of random facts about her? What was the point of all of this? Lexa knew she usually attracted crazies but something about this girl confirmed to Lexa that she wasn’t crazy. No, this girl gave Lexa butterflies. Lexa has NEVER felt butterflies before. Not even with Costia.
“Um okay but why are you tellin-”
“Now we aren’t strangers anymore.”
“What?”
“You just look like you need a friend or atleast someone to vent to. You said you didn’t feel comfortable talking to a stranger, so I made it easier for you. Also, it looks like we are the only two people in this train station for the night, so might as well enjoy eachother’s company.”
This girl can’t be serious. Can she? Lexa narrows her eyes scanning the girl for any sign of insincerity but all she sees is blue staring back. Blue is Lexa’s new favorite color. Lexa is closed off and guarded but something about this girl calms her. And the fact that after tonight they will most likely never see eachother again, is both comforting and sad to Lexa all at once.
“I’m Lexa.”
“Nice to meet you Lexa. Now tell me a few things about yourself.”
“I’m 21. I’m a writer. I have a black belt in martial arts. I’m not allergic to anything. And to get in my good graces it takes a hell of a lot more than a pint of ice cream.”
“Gelato.”
The brunette furrows her eyebrows in confusion at the blonde’s concise reply.
“What?”
“There is a distinct difference between ice cream and gelato.”
“Tomato tomahto”
And they went on like this. Arguing about the difference between gelato and ice cream. Exchanging playful banter. Discussing some of their deepest secrets in the late hours of the night on a cold hard bench in the middle of an empty train station listening to the pitter patter sounds rain drops made as they splattered on the massive windows surrounding them. Both of their eyes were alive for the first time in a long time. Both were enveloped by the warmth of one another's company. It was completely innocent but their was a tinge of longing intertwined with each accidental touch. By 4 a.m. both had fallen asleep. Clarke was nuzzled into Lexa’s neck as Lexa rested her head on top of Clarke’s. They both woke up to the final boarding call for the 7 a.m. train to NYC. They rushed on, not wanting to miss another train no matter how much they enjoyed one another’s company.
Clarke wanted to exchange numbers but Lexa thought it best if they didn’t. For Lexa, it would allow her to be too vulnerable - an emotion she shields herself from at all costs. And yet she just shared bits and pieces of herself with a complete stranger. Despite Clarke’s well intentions, that’s exactly what she was - a stranger. And Lexa thought it best to keep it that way. Anything more was too much for her to bear.
Secretly though, Lexa felt as if Clarke wasn’t a stranger. There was a familiarity about her surrounded by an air of comfort that soothed Lexa to no end. She knew that after last night, Clarke definitely was more than a stranger to her.
The brunette was running away from a bad breakup to go live with her sister in the city though. She couldn’t deal with a new relationship or even a friendship. Lexa didn’t want Clarke to be a rebound but that’s exactly what she would wind up being if they pursued something now. And Lexa couldn’t imagine just being friends with this enigma in front of her. So no way of contacting one another was the best option. They still had the train ride though. They made the most of the remainder of their time together talking and laughing, ending with one chaste but oh so electric kiss.
“Goodbye Lexa. May we meet again.”
“Goodbye Clarke. May we meet again.”
///
JULY 8, 2011
The next time Clarke and Lexa cross paths they don’t even realize it. Lexa was looking for a new painting to fill up some space in her new apartment. Lexa was fine with bare white walls, but Anya convinced her to go look at this gallery for a painting to spice up the place a bit.
Apparently Anya was sleeping with a new girl this month. Ramone, was it? No. Maybe Rachel? No. Hmm. Raven! Yeah that was it. Anyways, Anya had been sleeping with Raven who just happened to have a best friend and kick ass artist who has a lot of her work featured in this small little art gallery downtown. So when Anya start complaining about how her little sister’s apartment was seriously lacking with furnishing, she first thought of that gallery downtown.
“Come on Lex. Just look around and if you see anything you like, buy the damn thing. Don’t be so difficult.”
“Okay fine. Let me go take a look around. You said you know the artist?”
“I mean she is Raven’s roommate, but since I’m usually holed up in Rae’s room screwing her brains out and blondie’s in her art studio painting, I’ve only met her once or twice.”
“God Anya too much info.”
“Relax sis you just need to get laid. It’s been a year since you and Cos-”
“Anya.”
Lexa glared in her direction. Anya took the hint. She knew mentioning Costia was a sore subject so she choose to drop it. Besides she had a new idea forming in her head.
“I’m sorry Lex. But hey I have a remedy to your dry spell. The artist! Yeah she’s hot. If it weren’t for me sleeping with her roommate I’d hit it.”
“Again Anya too much -”
“Info. Yeah yeah I got it. Soo what do you say to a double date, huh? It can be very relaxed, no pressure.”
“I don’t know An. It’s been awhile and I hate blind dates.”
“Okay how about this then, just hanging out. Me, you, Raven, and Pablo Picasso’s female equivalent at The Dropship this Friday.”
“Fine. But only because I think she’s really talented. This one especially draws me in. I can’t explain it but I feel a pull to it, like I’m experiencing deja-vu.”
The picture Lexa was pointing at was of course created by none other than Clarke Griffin, inspired by their accidental meeting. The painting was two girls sitting on a bench asleep in a train station. It immediately reminded Lexa of her and Clarke.
Clarke. Of course Lexa remembers Clarke. Lexa believes she is the one that got away. That one regret everyone has in their life. The romantic ‘what if’ story everyone has tucked away in the crevices of their mind. I mean it probably wouldn’t have worked out. Clarke would have got bored of her or Lexa would have found out something really horrible about the blonde and called it quits. After all, nobody could be as perfect as this Clarke person seemed. Nothing can stay as perfect as the one night they had together. So instead, Lexa romanticizes the idea that Clarke was the ‘one’ for her. It’s a good way to avoid putting herself out there again.
The painting evoked such strong emotions for her she bought it on the spot, well over asking price. Once she hung it in her house later that night, her house felt a little more like a home. And it was, unknowingly to both parties, all because of Clarke Griffin.
///
JULY 12, 2011
Friday night later that week…
Raven wraps her arms around Anya’s waist and places a kiss on corner the older girl’s mouth, startling her a tad.
“Hey beautiful.”
Anya smiles into the embrace and turns her body slightly to lean in for another, much longer kiss. They stay like that, mouths moving to the beat of the club music, until the girl who came in with Raven clears her throat several several times.
“God you two are like cats in heat.”
Raven blushes a bit at her best friend’s comment, whereas Anya just smirks.
“I like you blondie. You have sass. Maybe a smartass like you can knock some sense into my little hotsister. Did I mention she’s hot?”
Clarke chuckles again. “Yes Anya you may have mentioned it once or twice. Gotta say it’s a little weird you keep talking about how hot your sister is.”
“Hey! I’m just trying to be her wingwoman.”
“Well as good as a job you are doing, you can’t be a wingwoman without a women to help out.”
“Shit you’re right. She’s prob just running late from a meeting with her editor. Let me shoot her a text.”
To Lexa [9:37 P.M.]: Where are you?! The hot artist has arrived! I repeat the painter of your apartment’s most prized and new possession is here and excited to meet you!
From Lexa [9:39 P.M.]: Sorry An. I can’t make it. Tell Raven’s friend I’m sorry.
To Lexa [9:40 P.M]: You can’t keep doing this to yourself. You have to put yourself out there sometime. But okay. I Love you. Have a nice night sitting in watching that silly post apocalypse show you love so much.
From Lexa [9:45 P.M.]: ‘Loved’ as in past tense. Don’t even get me started on that show, they killed off bae. Have a fun night Anya. And tell your friends I’m really sorry.
Clarke is sitting on a bar stool with Raven chugging down a Irish car bomb. The two girls are laughing and just having an all around fun time. Sigh. How Anya wishes Lexa would just come out with them. If she’s not ready to date, fine. But Clarke and Raven are fun to be around and Lexa needs a little fun.
Raven’s eyes are already unfocused when she locks gaze with her ‘friends with benefits’ Anya.
“Babe! Where art thou sister? I don’t want to drink Clarkey over here under the table before she can make a good impression on her future wife.”
“Raven! There’s so many things wrong with what you just said. For starters, I AM the one who’s going to be drinking YOU under the table. Get it straight Reyes.”
“Ain’t nothing straight about me Grif.”
The two girls exchange banter for a bit longer before Anya cuts in.
“Sorry guys my sister isn’t coming anymore. Let’s get our drink on!”
Clarke’s face falls a bit but only for a second. Why does she care about meeting this girl she doesn’t even know?
C’mon Griffin get a hold of yourself. You don’t even know this mystery girl.
The trio drinks together for a bit before Raven and Anya get up to go rub up against each other on the dance floor. Clarke is only left alone for a quick minute before an attractive guy with slightly too long of hair and a bright innocent smile makes his way over to her table.
“Hey. I’m Finn. Finn Collins.”
“Nice to meet you Collins. I’m Clarke.”
///
And that’s how it went for years. Lexa and Clarke just missing each other.
Raven and Anya stopped seeing each other a couple months later when Anya decided to accept a three year job with Doctor Without Borders across the world. They were starting to fall for eachother, starting to progress outside of their ‘fuck buddies’ mentality. But this was a chance of a lifetime, so Anya took it and Raven encouraged and supported her choice.
Lexa and Clarke ran the same trail at Central Park on Sundays, but they were both too busy in their own worlds to notice the girl they met on the train all those years ago. Lexa would occasionally buy a new painting at the gallery, but Clarke was never there when the brunette was. Clarke would visit her friend Octavia for lunch in her office every couple of weeks to catch up. Octavia worked at a private security firm on floor 10 of a major commercial building. The same major commercial building that happened to be where Lexa's book editor worked on floor 12.
Both Clarke and Lexa think about the other from time to time. They both can’t help but wonder what if? The two girls felt a spark. No, they felt much more than a spark. It wasn’t love. But it was an intense magnetism. They felt comfortable and safe. And that was as scary a feeling as any. There was potential for something great, hell maybe even love. But the timing wasn’t right. Would the timing ever be right though?
There were so many coincidences. So many opportunities for another chance meeting just like the time they first met on the train, but it never happened. It never happened until yet again the wrong timing.
///
AUGUST 2018
So after 8 years, where do these two finally meet? Well of course at the goddamn train station where it all began.
Lexa just got off a long train ride from Boston, where she finished up the last leg of her book tour. She was tired, starving, and not in the mood for anyone’s shit. So obviously life has to kick her in the ass when a woman runs right into her with a searing hot cup of tea.
“Fuck! Ow.”
“Oh my god. I’m so sorry. I didn’t even see you. I wasn’t paying attention. Here let me help you clean this-”
“Clarke?”
Clarke is cut off from her ramble by a slightly familiar voice. And that’s when blue eyes lock with green for the first time in 8 years. The electricity and tension between them is still there and oh so palpable even after all this time.
Lexa can’t believe her eyes! This is her ‘what if.” This is that girl that she couldn’t get out of her head for months. Lexa is a confident badass woman. And yet looking at this blue eyed blonde wearing a Polis U sweatshirt and yoga pants with her hair tucked away in a messy bun, is making her feel like a fumbling teenager. Apparently the sentiment is mutual, as they both stare at eachother with reddened blushes for much too long for strangers.
“Lexa?”
“Yeah.”
Lexa replies with a sheepish “yeah.” A one word answer as she stares into blue. Blue. Blue. She can’t think straight let alone form coherent sentences.
“Wow the years have been very kind to you Lex.”
The brunette forgot how forward the blonde was. I mean after all, they only spent one day together. It didn’t mean anything. Who are they kidding? It meant something. If they were being completely honest with themselves it meant much much more than something. It was the strongest connection they’ve felt with anyone ever and the fact that it came on so quick terrified them both to the core. But people react differently to being scared. Clarke was ready to charge in headfirst, while Lexa hesitated and ran away.
“As they have been for you too Clarke.”
The brunette just then realizes how wet and sticky she is. From the tea that is. And in desperate need to change her shirt. Clarke catches on to her uncomfort.
“You know I’m staying in the hotel right next door. You can borrow some clothes, even take a shower if you’d like and we can catch up. Is that weird? I know we only met that once but I-”
“Yes I’d love to catch up Clarke.”
“Yeah?”
“Definitely. Now lead the way.”
And the playful banter ensues all the way to Clarke’s room. Lexa undresses and decides for a quick shower in Clarke’s hotel bathroom. Lexa doesn’t even think about how strange it may seem to outside people that she just followed some girl to her hotel room after spending a day and night with her once nearly a decade ago. But what outside people don’t realize is how strong that bond between Clarke and Lexa grew in their limited time together. Lexa opened up to her and shared everything with her. She told Clarke things she never even mentioned to her own sister. And Clarke told Lexa of her biggest fears, her few regrets, and many dreams. There was no denying their connection.
The brunette began replaying their literal run in from thirty minutes ago in her head, play by play. It is only then while Lexa is in Clarke’s shower smiling like an idiot that she realizes at least one thing has changed for the blonde in the past eight years. And that’s the diamond ring and wedding band that sparkled so brightly on Clarke’s rough artist hands. Well fuck.