Let it Rain, Mangle
“Don’t you ever disobey us again, you little shit! Remember who you belong to, next time I won’t let you off so easy!”
Mangle winced as the door to their bedroom slammed shut and the lock was turned outside, effectively locking them inside. Slowly, they sat up and climbed off of their bed. Their legs protested, the thin marks stinging as the skin around them stretched.
They could feel their blood beading along the thin cuts as they stumbled across their bedroom to their bookbag, quickly unzipping it and rooting around inside for their compact mirror. They breathed harshly as tears gathered in their eyes, but stubbornly they wiped them away.
I won’t give those fuckers the satisfaction.
Pulling out the old, battered compact, they sat down heavily on the floor and flipped it open, aiming the mirror towards the underside of their thighs.
The white fox breathed in sharply as they looked at the multiple thin cuts bleeding into their otherwise pristine fur, and already the stinging red from where the switch had hit was showing through.
Taking a deep breath in through their nose, Mangle lightly touched the reddening, sore area and winced. Looks like the bastard got me good this time...
It wasn’t like Mangle didn’t try to protest. It was just that protesting made him hit them harder.
“Oh father dear,” they muttered darkly, snapping their mirror shut and dropping it back into their bag, “how I would so like to claw your fucking eyes out...”
They didn’t get up; the first aid kit was in their bathroom, hidden in a hole behind the broken picture frame they kept hanging on the wall. There was nothing they could do yet, so instead they let themselves fall back onto the cold wooden floor to stare up at the chipped ceiling.
Outside, they could hear the wind whistling through the trees surrounding the house. Oh to be free like the wind... To be able to go wherever whenever I want... to take revenge when I could and let be where I should... to just fly away from all my troubles... to take others’ troubles away...
It was a fantasy, and desperately they latched onto it, closing their eyes and taking in a deep breath. The scent of blood faded away as they blocked out everything around them; the argument downstairs disappeared, the creaking of the house disappeared, the chill of the floor beneath their back disappeared... and all that they were left with was the whistling of the wind, the rustling of the trees, and an empty void of darkness, stretching on into nowhere and forever.
Deep in their mind, Mangle danced through that void, moving with the wind as a whole new world materialized around them; nearby, the lake flooded into existence, and all around them grass sprouted from the emptiness. The sun rose over the horizon, painting the sky all sorts of oranges and reds and blues... and, as they stopped spinning, the fox found themself looking up the hill towards a large oak tree, a picnic basket on a purple and pink blanket sitting underneath it.
From behind them, laughter rang out and a bright blue blur ran past them, followed closely by yellow and brown. A grin split across Mangle’s face and they laughed as the bear managed to tackle the blue rabbit, sending both Animals tumbling harmlessly across the grass. Chii danced around them, looking so carefree with her feathers wild and bouncing around as she laughed and cheered Alfred on.
“They sure are somethin’, huh?” another familiar voice asked from behind them, and Mangle turned around to face the golden rabbit. He was smiling so brightly, his green eyes lit up in a way Mangle hadn’t seen in years, and they had the urge to just throw themself at him and hug him and just cry.
“Sure are,” the fox agreed with a laugh, looking back towards the other three. “Despite everything, I’m the luckiest fox in the world.”
“Why d’you say that?” Spring questioned, suddenly standing next to Mangle and watching the playful wrestling match in front of them.
Mangle grinned over at him and lightly nudged his arm, prompting him to look over at them. With a dramatic gesture around the empty park- empty but for their friends- the fox answered with the most sincerity they had ever expressed.
“I’m the luckiest fox because I have the best family in the entire universe.”
Spring just smiled... because he understood.
After all, he had the same family.
Then he nudged Mangle and said, “Race ya to the food.”
With a grin, Mangle took off, laughing at the indignant “hey!” from behind them as they sprinted up the hill. They let out a triumphant whoop as they whirled around to look over the park, over their friends, over and into forever.
A forever made of joy and true family, true belonging, true happiness.
So caught up in the fantasy world they had created, Mangle didn’t notice their phone lighting up and vibrating where it sat on their bedside table, flashing a familiar, but unfamiliar, number.
They just smiled.
There was no voice message, so Mangle assumed that whatever it had been about wasn’t important. Maybe a wrong number. Maybe not, but the number wasn’t one they knew anyway.
They didn’t call back.
It didn’t matter, though; what mattered was the moment they were in.
Their thighs were stinging painfully as they sat next to Blu, leaning against the gymnasium and letting their gaze scan over their friends. None of them looked in very good shape, and Mangle understood without even asking just why all four of the others decided to skip gym- there hadn’t been a single discussion about it that morning.
Spring’s eyes were dull- so different from my fantasy last night...- and he sat somewhat slouched, but concern was reflected there as he looked over all of them. Chii’s legs were tightly drawn together, Alfred was sitting very stiffly, and Blu was... well... Mangle didn’t know how to describe him in that moment; he looked ready to just collapse and he wasn’t even standing.
Closing their eyes, they leaned their head back against the gymnasium wall. They could hear the students inside filing out to go to the track, thankfully out of sight of their hideout between the gym’s back wall and the woods less than a football field away.
“What happened last night, Blu?” Spring finally dared. It was the first time any of them asked, all of them wary of the watching eyes. Mangle themself had only noticed because their friends would fall silent at the simplest hint that any of the Fazcrew was around, but they knew how serious of a problem they might have had.
“Mother barged into my room, yelled some, threw a wooden bowl at my head and then hit me,” Blu told them without hesitance, and Mangle opened their eyes to look at him. He looked utterly exhausted, and the bruise Mangle knew was out of sight only made it worse. “On the bright side, no blood last night. Just a horrible headache and I ache everywhere, but I’ll be fine when I get some sleep.”
Sitting up and ignoring the pain in their legs, Mangle asked, “When was the last time you slept?”
“Uh, yesterday at Spring’s house.” Mangle frowned and glanced at Spring, noticing his tight, worried expression.
That doesn’t count, Mangle thought to themself. “No, real sleep,” they clarified. “Like... a full night’s sleep. Dreams and all.” They had a feeling they would not like the answer.
“Ah, um,” Blu started, frowning in thought. “Saturday night I think?”
Fuck’s sake...
“You need sleep!” Chii gasped in horror. “That’s not good for you, you could pass out!”
Mangle leaned back as Blu said, “I’ll sleep tonight, even if I have to go to the old fort.”
The old fort. Mangle felt their blood run cold and they closed their eyes, remembering that old... thing that Spring’s real father had built, back when they were all five or six. It had been a request made by Spring, hardly a year before his father got remarried and...
Mangle didn’t want to think about it. They shivered almost violently at the memories that always came with the old fort, remembering that man whose name had been forced on Spring and Spring’s sister... that man who had somehow sired someone as adorable and sweet as Plushie...
And that wasn’t even mentioning what happened after Mangle’s father had found the fort. It was near his land, after all.
“-en there in nearly six years, Blu, it’s a death trap now...” Spring was saying as Mangle tuned back in. “Oh my god, please tell me you haven’t been running off there by yourself, Blu...”
Please, Mangle silently begged as well, opening their eyes and looking towards their friend again. Blu looked guilty and Spring looked utterly horrified- and Chii and Alfred didn’t look much better.
“It’s not often!” Blu tried to excuse, but Mangle couldn’t think of any real excuse. “J-just when I can’t stand staying home and, I just- I don’t want to bother you guys all of the time...”
“Blu, you know you can always come to my house,” Spring desperately tried to explain, sounding so distraught that it broke the fox’s heart. How they longed for the carefree days again, when Spring might have laughed and hugged Blu, assuring him that it was never a bother... “Anything could have happened at that old treehouse, Blu- you could have fallen through the floor and broken your neck and we wouldn’t have even thought to look there for you...!”
It was true, none of them would have considered the old fort as somewhere to look. Mangle hated walking along their father’s land, with the memories and vibes it carried...
“Spring,” Alfred interrupted, almost startling Mangle. “He’s fine.”
Mangle wanted to protest that too, but they chose to hold their tongue and just lean back against the wall, closing their eyes again. Why can’t things be simpler...
“But anything could have happened,” Spring protested weakly.
“But it didn’t,” Alfred countered, his voice soft but filled with finality. Spring didn’t try to argue more. “But it would... be... best to... not go there.” He was struggling, and that broke Mangle’s heart even further.
When Alfred felt forced to talk, that meant things were bad.
“Next time please come to me instead,” Spring said tiredly. Mangle didn’t open their eyes. They didn’t want to see his expression. “I don’t want anything to happen to you. I don’t care if it’s one in the morning, just don’t go there again.”
Please...
“How are all of you holding up?” Blu diverted, and though all of them knew he was diverting none of them called him out on it. Mangle almost wished they did.
Mangle looked away, even though their eyes were still closed, and settled their hands on their thighs. I really don’t wanna talk about it...
“I, uh, forgot to take my medicine this morning...” Spring answered after a few moments of silence, and immediately Mangle’s eyes snapped open and they turned to the golden-furred rabbit, shocked. Quickly, the rabbit added, “Plushie had the nightmare man dream again.”
Just the name sent an unpleasant shiver through Mangle, and they clenched their teeth as they watched Spring’s hand go to his chest. Still affecting them even when he’s gone. Fucking bastard...
It was Chii who broke the chilled silence. “Charlie came into my room again.” Mangle’s heart practically stopped at those words. Every time Chii had... problems with her step-father, Mangle was terrified that she’d say those words- those life-altering, life-destroying words... “Tried to... I... it doesn’t matter,” she finished, refusing to look at any of them, ashamed. However, Mangle felt some relief; tried to.That means he didn’t succeed. Thank god...
Mangle wished they could hug their friend and comfort them- they knew how she felt, after all. To have hands, unloving and unwelcome, on your body, ghosting across every part of you that was meant for only those you chose... to be sized up and treated like someone’s toy... to have all of your rights stripped from you in one single moment, to struggle to regain it- to wrestle with the feeling of it’s my fault, they only do it because I’m me, if I was better they wouldn’t...
They wanted so badly to reach out to her, to let her talk to them about it, let her cling to them and just let it all out, find comfort in the familiarity of a friend, the understanding of a fellow victim...
But they knew it wasn’t welcome. Not yet. Not until she couldn’t feel the ghost of his hands anymore.
The best thing I can do is speak up now, Mangle thought miserably, clenching their hands into fists. “My parents got mad when I tried to... refuse,” they answered next, staring at the ground beyond their legs. “Grabbed the switch and...” They don’t need details... “Well, I won’t be wearing shorts for a while,” they finished, finally looking up at their friends.
The silence that fell after their words was heavy and tense, and they hoped Alfred would find his voice soon. Partly because they were worried and partly because they felt like they were drowning in the air.
“Dad hit me with a bottle again,” Alfred started, his voice somewhat unsteady as he spoke. “In the back and shoulder.” Mangle watched, ears flat, as Alfred began rolling the left sleeve of his T-shirt up, revealing a very red bandage that was in desperate need of changing. Just the sight of it made Mangle sick with worry. “It... wasn’t close to empty,” Alfred finished.
Mangle cringed and bowed their head, feeling awful. Why, why, god why is it always like this?!
“Don’t think I got all the glass out,” Alfred added softly. Mangle didn’t dare open their eyes. “Won’t stop bleeding.”
“Jesus Christ, why is it always this way...” Blu muttered. Mangle didn’t look up and they didn’t answer him because they wanted to know the same exact thing.
There was no answer, though, and that alone broke their heart.
They were all suffering and simply put... there was absolutely no reason for it. They just were.
Welcome to hell, starring our lives...
Mangle concentrated on the window, pretending not to notice the red fox sitting next to them. The Fazcrew and the loud human girls were all silent, as though all of them could feel the heavy air hanging around the room.
Dr. Schmidt, however, didn’t seem to get the memo. Mangle didn’t mind, though. It was nice to see someone smiling still.
However, when he clapped his hands together right after the bell rang, it was not appreciated.
“Alright, class! Homework!”
Without much hesitance, Mangle turned to their bookbag and pulled their purple-and-pink binder out, pausing to glance at the printed out photograph slipped inside the plastic.
It was of them and their friends, just over a year before celebrating the fourth of July. They were in Spring’s bedroom- the painted-green walls and the four-poster bed large enough to accommodate all five of them plus Plushie, if they so desired, were unmistakable, and just barely Mangle could see the blue curtain to the ever-locked balcony doors in Spring’s room.
They smiled slightly at the photo; Spring was in the middle, his back against his bed, with a lapful of laughing bunnies- one blue and one gold- while Mangle had literally just jumped onto the bed behind him, their hands moments from landing on the bemused teen’s shoulders. Alfred had somehow ended up on his stomach with Chii sitting on his back, looking like the queen of England. The bear was laughing so freely that just the sight of the memory warmed Mangle’s heart.
Behind the camera, they remembered, was Spring’s sister, who had been laughing at the chaos happening in her brother’s bedroom that day.
That day, just a few months before everything started falling apart.
Their smile dropping into a frown, the fox quickly flipped the binder open and pulled the packet out. When they looked up, Chii was watching them with sad blue eyes. Wordlessly, Mangle handed the packet over to her.
Dr. Schmidt collected everything and Mangle turned back to the window, fidgeting as they stared at the sky. Raindrops hit the window, and somewhere in the distance lightning flashed.
They didn’t bother tuning in to hear what the teacher had to say. Instead, they stared out at the rain, remembering a time... not too long ago, actually, when the fox and Blu had run out into the back yard and just danced in the rain, laughing so carelessly... and from the porch Spring, Alfred, and Chii had watched them and, eventually, joined them.
It had felt so normal, grabbing the blue rabbit’s hands in their own and spinning around, letting the rain soak them through. It had felt so normal, laughing and collapsing into the wet grass with their friends, just looking at the grey skies above...
“Mangle!” they could hear as the image materialized before their eyes, the classroom fading away and leaving them with nothing but the rain. Blu and Chii ran out of the rain and over to them, each grabbing one of the fox’s hands. “Come dance with us!”
With a laugh, Mangle allowed their friends to drag them along, out into the pouring rain where Spring and Alfred were waiting, already soaking wet and smiling.
“Mangle!” they greeted in unison as Blu and Chii released their hands. “Glad you could make it!” Spring added, and Alfred just nodded in agreement, as quiet as ever. His smile, however, said everything Mangle needed to hear.
Smiling widely, Mangle laughed and grabbed the nearest pair of hands- they were Chii’s, the fox dimly noted- and began spinning around, pulling the laughing chicken with them. “Dance with me!” Mangle called out to their friends, and laughing, Blu and Spring joined in.
“I’ll pass,” Alfred chuckled. Mangle and Chii shared a look and then grinned. Without warning, both of them reached out and grabbed one of Alfred’s hands, pulling him closer to them.
“Dance with us!” Chii giggled, and this time Alfred didn’t say no, allowing the two to drag him along into the friendly dance, laughing. Nearby, they could hear Spring and Blu laughing as they danced, too, letting the cold, soothing water soak through their fur- and, in Chii’s case, her feathers. It was nice, it was fun, it was-
“Yes, Mr. Salvage?”
Gone.
Blinking, Mangle turned away from the window to look at the instructor, and then towards Spring, furrowing their brow. Spring’s hand was up in the air.
“May I step out for a moment?” the golden rabbit requested, his voice soft and shaky. It lacked the confidence that the Spring Mangle knew and loved had.
He was nervous, he was afraid, he was hurting.
“Of course,” Dr. Schmidt allowed, and Mangle watched as Spring leapt out of his seat and to the door, his phone up to his ear before he was even in the hallway.
Plushie... Frowning, they looked at Chii to find her turning around to face them. Golden eyes met blue, and they just watched one another.
Mangle understood. This is bad.
Yeah, no kidding- Spring doesn’t need this right now.
“Mr. Rodriguez, face the front please,” the instructor called, and Chii turned around as if the command had been meant for her instead. Mangle let their gaze fall to their desk, scowling.
This isn’t fair, they thought, desperately wishing they could draw their fantasy back forth. Why...
They felt powerless. Completely unable to do anything. Anxiously, they shifted in their seat and drew their left leg up, slipping it under them- usually a very comfortable position for them, but the switch marks had completely slipped their mind. As the extra pressure was applied, pain shot through their leg and they quickly dropped their leg again. Sorry, Mangle ol’ pal, can’t get comfortable today...
It wasn’t fair.
They continued staring at their desk, not really hearing their instructor speaking. At that point, the only sound they were seeking was the sound of the door opening.
And open it did.
The fox’s gaze snapped up to the golden rabbit entering, but... he wasn’t heading to his desk. He was heading towards the teacher, and when he spoke Mangle couldn’t hear. He was speaking quietly- whispering. Whatever it was, it clearly wasn’t good.
Plushie. Humming softly, Mangle fidgeted. Plushie needs to leave school. Damn...
That meant Spring wouldn’t be there for the rest of the day. Suddenly, skipping the rest of the day and just heading over to Spring’s house, waiting for him to come home with his brother, sounded like a grand idea.
They knew they couldn’t, however, as they watched Spring pack up and head out. The moment the door clicked shut, Mangle closed their eyes and turned back to the window.
Sometimes, they thought, sometimes I wish I was someone else... but then who would have taken my place? Would I have ever met them? My friends... my family... if I was anyone else, I wouldn’t have them. The very thought made their heart clench and their breath threatened to hitch with a sudden, unexpected stinging behind their eyes. I couldn’t live with that.
Their fingers inched towards their left arm, remembering the feeling of a blade sliding along it. It had given them peace, something to concentrate on, when their parents were too much to deal with... they could remember that feeling. It had been nice to feel in control of something, even if that something was their own pain.
Quickly they shoved the thought from their mind- they had promised their friends more than a year ago. If I could survive without it through November then I can survive without it now, the fox firmly told themself. Stop thinking about it.
With a quiet breath, Mangle opened their eyes, staring out the window again. Now where was I... Oh, right...
It was nice, feeling the rain soaking through their fur and hearing the laughter of their friends. It was a familiar sound, but never had it sounded so carefree...
The storm was in full rage again, outside the safe four... or five, six, seven, eight, whatever walls surrounding them. It was dark in Spring’s house that night, most of the lights turned out. Their homework, already long completed, laid on the coffee table in the downstairs living room, and their bags were left carelessly by the wall, leaving the floor by the couches clear in case either sleeping rabbit were to wake up.
The fox sat in the bay window off of Spring’s dining room, the cushion beneath them soft, and they just stared at the rain pounding against the glass above and around them. From the kitchen they could hear a shifting of pots and pans as Chii and Spring cooked. Light barely filtered through the cracks in the door, but it wasn’t enough to disturb Mangle’s view of the darkened world beyond.
“You shouldn’t have silenced your phone.”
Alfred’s voice was sudden, and in any other moment Mangle would have felt shocked. However, they just didn’t have the energy to. “My parents are calling,” they stated simply. “I don’t want to hear what they have to say.”
“You’ll be in more trouble tomorrow.”
“Hello pot, I’m kettle.”
The bear snorted softly, prompting Mangle to turn around and look at him. He was wearing a different shirt- this one was a grey tank-top, Mangle dimly noted in the dark room- and what looked like blue pajama pants, which was funny to the fox because they knew for a fact that Alfred did not wear pajamas.
“What?” Mangle asked, raising a brow at their friend. A flash of lightning lit the room, briefly revealing Alfred’s soft, tired smile. Despite the bandage that Mangle could see tightly, clinically wrapped around his shoulder, he seemed more relaxed than he had all day.
“Technically my phone isn’t silenced,” Alfred explained, his voice beginning to fade. “I forgot it.”
Mangle frowned and glanced outside again. “So it’s on your bedside table?”
“Desk.”
“Ah...” Not that that was any better, of course. “But you’ll be in just as much trouble as me, y’know.”
“No,” Alfred countered, walking over to stand near the fox. Mangle could hear him approach, his feet padding softly on the gold and white tiles beneath. “My folks don’t care. Yours...”
“Don’t care in a different way,” Mangle finished with a sigh, leaning their forehead against the glass. “I don’t want to go back... but if I don’t they’ll call the cops and they’ll just drag me back anyway...”
Alfred didn’t answer this time. Mangle knew he didn’t know how to answer. Where the bear had to worry about beer bottles, drugs, and simple making ends meet to keep his money-wasting, pain-inducing, hateful parents off of the streets, Mangle had to worry about... about being their parents’ source of income in a much different way.
After all, Alfred earned money by producing a product. Mangle was their parents’ product... and sell it they did.
Their arms tightened around their knees, and desperately they shoved the thought aside. “Shall we check on the others?” Mangle suggested, glancing back at Alfred.
“Sure,” the bear agreed, his voice soft but unstrained. “Maybe they would like help,” he added, and Mangle almost smiled.
When Alfred was comfortable... when he felt safe... with the people who mattered most to him... it was so much easier for him to talk. Mangle loved how smooth and soothing his voice was, even just speaking. When he sang, though... well, Alfred had a gift with music, on par with his talent for writing.
Paired together, Alfred’s poetry- so easily converted into song- and his voice was amazing. It used to feel like a privilege to even so much as hear him speak, even moreso when he sang. After thirteen or so years of friendship, though, Mangle had heard his voice enough times to grow used to it.
Of course, puberty and maturity had done wonders for the lanky teen who really looked like he could use a burger or two.
It was then that Mangle realized that none of them had eaten lunch that day- and, if they knew their friends well enough, that meant they hadn’t eaten anything.
“Yeah, maybe,” they agreed, slipping out of the window seat and stretching, ignoring the sting in their legs. Mangle didn’t really feel hungry- they felt too heartsick, honestly- but they knew that it wouldn’t be good for any of them to go without food.
It was already bad enough that Blu was fast asleep, undoubtedly not having eaten anything since dinner the day before...
Alfred simply nodded and turned, heading towards the kitchen to join Spring and Chii. Mangle followed, pausing to cast one more glance outside into the pitch blackness.
A flash of lightning lit the room, followed closely by rumbling thunder.
The fox frowned, but they turned and walked towards the kitchen where Alfred was watching, waiting, outside the door.
Maybe they were being melodramatic, but in that moment, that lightning felt like an omen.
I wonder what tomorrow holds for us...