No Quick Fix

Dean arrived at the station with his mind still full of blue eyes and raven sex-hair. That was one seriously hot nurse that Charlie had introduced him to - no way with Dean's luck would the guy even be into guys, never mind Dean.

There was something about him that had struck Dean, though. A sort of warmth in his manner, that made it seem to the firefighter that this could be a man he could be friends with. There was a vulnerability there too, Dean noticed, although Cas hid it well. It wasn't just the vulnerability of being the new guy either - Cas had a story, that was for sure.

"Hey, Dean," a voice called to him. He looked up and saw Rufus, waving at him across the break room.

"Hey, Rufus."

"You alright there, buddy? You were away in a dream."

"Nah, 'm fine," Dean shrugged it off. "Just been to the hospital, is all." Not a word of a lie, but he knew fine well what his colleague would assume he was thinking about.

"Ah, right. How is the old man? Any change?" And there it was. Dean shook his head. Rufus clapped him on the shoulder, and quickly changed the subject. "Here's hoping for a quiet 24, eh?"

Dean grinned. "Oh I dunno, old man. Some of us younger guys still like a call out or two, breaks up the days."

A hand smacked him round the back of the head, but Dean just laughed. Rufus was retiring in a couple of weeks, and hadn't heard the end of it from anyone on the shift since he'd told them.

"Watch it, boy. I've still got some time to mess you up before I go."

"Yeah, yeah."

Dean grinned at him and wandered away, heading to his bunk to drop his bag. He called back over his shoulder. "New guy started at the hospital. Drinks at the roadhouse after shift tomorrow, you in?"

He heard Rufus grunt an affirmative, just as another voice addressed him from within the bunk room.

"Drinks, Deano?"

Yeah, Gabe," Dean answered, stashing his bag. "Roadhouse tomorrow. New nurse started in the ER."

"Sure. What's he like? Can I mess with him?"

Dean glared at Gabe. The man had a history of playing practical jokes on everyone, and messing with any new people they brought into the fold. It wasn't always funny.

"Leave him alone, Gabriel," Dean said, finger pointing at the trickster. "He seems like a good guy, but give him some time to get used to us all before you start. He just moved here."

"Where from?"

"Uh, no idea," Dean frowned, realising he hadn't even asked; not that the information had been offered at all. "Just leave Cas alone, alright?"

"Cas?" Gabriel asked, a strange look on his face.

"Yeah, Cas. Castell or something. Novak, I think he said," Dean shrugged, knowing fine well what the man's name was. He'd already done his over-protective bit in the last two minutes - no need to give Gabe any idea of what his thoughts about the guy really were. He'd never live it down. He looked at Gabriel when he realised the man had been unusually silent, and saw that the other firefighter had gone grey.

"Gabe? You alright?"

"What? Oh!" Gabe shook his head, as if to literally shake himself out of his funk, and grinned at Dean. It didn't quite reach his eyes, though. "Sure, Deano, why wouldn't I be? I just, uh, have to make a phonecall. Just remembered the, uh, the cat. I forgot to let it in when I left, you know I'll be back in a minute..."

Dean stared open-mouthed as Gabriel trailed off and almost ran from the room. What the hell had spooked him? Did he even have a cat? Weird.

As the rest of this shift arrived, Dean let it go and caught up with them, inviting the usual suspects to their night out after their shift. Gabe had always been a little weird anyway.

~~~

There was no denying it; Cas was nervous. His palms were starting to sweat slightly as he changed into the jeans and shirt he had brought for their night at the Roadhouse. He was glad that he was the only one in the guys' locker room - everyone else had already headed home, with only Charlie, Meg and Anna coming from the hospital tonight. Apparently that was the norm, unless Garth came along, but he wasn't tonight.

Pulling on his blue shirt, he smoothed it down, wiping his hands at the same time. With one final check in the mirror (absolutely not a single point in trying to do anything with his hair), he headed out to wait for the girls. Charlie was already waiting.

"Ready, Cas? They shouldn't be long."

"Sure," he grinned. "Could do with a couple of beers after today."

Charlie's smile soured into a grimace. "I'm telling you Cas, the next time any idiot comes in here with something random stuck in a cavity it should never have been near, you and I are hiding and Meg can take that crap."

"Still not the strangest thing I've ever seen up a man's ass," Cas shrugged, trying not to blush when he realised how that might sound.

"Seriously? Weirder than a toy cab and police car?” Charlie’s eyes were wide as she regarded him, and they both held off a shudder at what their afternoon had been. “No way.”

“Absolutely,” Cas said firmly, folding his arms. He laughed as Charlie’s eyes widened even further; she was fun to tease, he’d discovered today, and she was waiting desperately for him to explain himself. It wasn’t often she held herself back as well as this.

“What’s going on?” Anna asked as she and Meg appeared next to them.

“Cas,” Charlie said accusingly, finger pointing in his face. “Claims to have dealt with a weirder case than ours before, and he’s not saying what it was.”

“I’m not not saying,” Cas grinned. Meg and Anna both looked a bit nauseated at the thought that he would tell them what he’d seen. He wasn’t surprised, considering how quickly the two of them had disappeared earlier.

Charlie threw herself at him, planting her hands on his shoulders and peering closely at him. At length, she spoke. “Nope. He’s lying.”

Cas shrugged. “Okay,” and walked away towards the doors, grinning at Charlie’s “hey!” as he went. Meg and Anna fell into step beside him, and he heard Charlie’s footsteps as she hurried to catch up.

“Tell me, Cas…” she whined.

“I was lying,” he said nonchalantly.

“No, you weren’t!”

Cas said nothing, but just grinned at her.

“Fine, but I will find out. Just wait – tequila works like veritaserum.”

“Like what?”

Cas realised as he held the door open for the girls to walk through, that Charlie had stopped moving. In fact, she seemed to be frozen to the spot, and was gaping at Cas like he was some sort of supernatural creature she had never seen before.

“Charlie?” he called out, gesturing towards the door.

“You don’t know what veritaserum is?” she replied, still gaping.

“Should I?” he shrugged.

“Oh, my, God,” Charlie raised a finger to point at him. “You, you muggle, Cas!”

Suddenly she was next to him, her arm linked through his and hauling him into the parking lot as if she had been waiting for him. He allowed himself to dragged along towards Meg’s car, listening as Charlie tried to make him swear he would let her take full control of his boy-wizard education, whatever the hell that meant. He just agreed as she pulled him into the back seat. Somehow, he thought this conversation might take a while, but at least the nerves at been put on the back burner.

The Roadhouse was, as expected, pretty busy. It was generally thought of as the best bar in the area, and Friday nights were popular. Cas realised quite quickly that the hospital staff were quite well known here, when the owner, Ellen, came over to their table at the back of the bar to ‘welcome the new blood’. Soon, he realised that he was actually quite comfortable here. The beers were flowing (tequila successfully avoided so far), Anna, Charlie and Meg were competing to tell Cas the most embarrassing story about each other, and he’d met a couple of off-duty doctors from the hospital that he hadn’t come across in his two days of shifts.

When Dean arrived, Cas was glad he’d had a few beers to calm himself. Somehow, the man looked even hotter today, despite just coming off a full 24-hour shift. Cas saw him arrive, a green Henley covered by a black leather jacket framing the shoulders that started pushing their way through the crowd until he was standing in front of their table, grinning at them all in that easy-going manner he seemed to carry with him like a gift.

“Evening ladies, Cas,” he said, nodding at the girls before his eyes landed on the man in question. “You doing alright there, buddy? Coping alright with this three?”

“Fine, Dean, thank you.” Cas answered, smiling.

“He doesn’t know Harry Potter, Dean!” Charlie called out, indignantly.

Dean whistled, then slid into the booth next to Cas. “Oh man, that’s dangerous territory, admitting something like that to Charlie.”

“Entirely accidental, I assure you,” Cas answered, fighting the urge to blush at the firefighter’s sudden proximity. What the hell was it about this guy?

“You alone, Dean?” Meg asked, looking around the room.

“Na, Rufus and Tommy are at the bar. Benny’s outside on the phone to Andrea, and Gabe will be here shortly. He went to home to change or whatever.”

“Oh, Tommy’s here?” Meg immediately started rummaging in her purse, emerging a few seconds later with lip gloss in hand.

Dean was just rolling his eyes at her.

Rufus and Tommy appeared a few minutes later, Benny falling into step behind them. Introductions were quickly made and everyone squeezed tightly into the booth. Neither Dean nor Cas found themselves complaining when their sides were pressed together, although they were both aware that the other might be feeling a little uncomfortable.

Dean took the situation in hand by striking up a conversation with Cas, realising that he really wanted to get to know him, and the sooner the better.

“So how long have you been here, Cas?”

“Just a couple of weeks. The beginning of the month, really.”

“How come you ended up in Lawrence?”

Cas began to pick at the label of his beer bottle. “I, uh, needed a new job, and this one came up. It was far enough away, too.”

Dean frowned at Cas’ obvious discomfort. “Sorry, man. I shouldn’t have pried.”

Cas looked up and smiled at him. “It’s not prying, Dean. A perfectly normal question, don’t worry.”

“Well, you don’t have to tell me anything.”

“Thank you,” Cas said softly. Dean realised a moment later that he was staring at Cas and abruptly turned to the rest of the table. “Hey, guys? I’m gonna order some onion rings and fries and shit. Who wants in?”

A chorus of affirmation sounded around the table and Dean slid out of the booth. He flashed a quick smile at Cas. “Wait till you try Ellen’s onion rings, Cas. Best in the damn country.” And he was gone.

Everyone else around the table went back to the conversations they were having before, but that just allowed Cas some time to have a good look around the place, and, okay, to watch Dean.

Cas watched Dean approach the bar and catch Ellen’s attention. The woman gave him a warm smile, rolling her eyes at him and slapping his hand. Cas smiled as he watched the two converse; they clearly knew each other well. As Ellen walked away, presumably towards the kitchen, the girl she had pointed out earlier as her daughter, Jo, moved over and continued the conversation. Clearly, Dean wouldn’t be back for a few minutes.

He turned his attention back to the table, where he realised that Charlie was staring at him. Fighting off the blush at having been caught, he instead plastered an innocent look on his face and stared back. She grinned at him, but said nothing about it.

“So, Cas, obviously you need to start with the books first. I can give you my lending set, no problem.”

“Your lending set?” Cas was confused.

“Sure. I have my first set, a good set that’s still sealed up, and my lending set. I bought them for when I met poor souls like you.”

Cas was starting to realise that Charlie was slightly mad, but in a way that he absolutely adored. He smiled at her.

“Sounds great. I promise I will read with interest.”

Charlie snorted. “You better, or you and me are done before we begin, Novak!”

Cas laughed, but the playful expression on Charlie’s face dropped away quickly, as she muttered a profanity under her breath.

“What’s wrong?” Cas frowned, but she didn’t answer. Instead, he turned to follow her line of sight, and saw Dean talking to a woman that hadn’t been there a minute before. He turned back to Charlie. “Who’s that?”

“That would be Lisa,” she said with a grimace. “Dean’s ex.”

“Oh.”

“Just don’t talk about it too loud, ok? Anna can’t stand her, and if she sees them she’ll be over there making it worse.”

“Why does she hate her?”

“’Cos she’s a vindictive lying cow, mostly, but the feeling’s kinda mutual, since Dean moved onto Anna for a while after they split up.”

“Ah.” Cas said quietly. His stomach drooped in a sudden aching emptiness. Straight, then. He gave himself a mental slap in the face; relationships were off limit, remember? It didn’t matter the tiniest bit whether Dean was straight, gay or neither. Cas wouldn’t be going there anyway, no matter what he ended up feeling towards the guy.

“Oh look, there’s Gabe,” Benny suddenly said from his seat across the table. Cas automatically turned to look at the doors, and very quickly wished that he hadn’t.

His chest swooped and he felt sick.

No, no, no. Not here, not here.

His head was fuzzy and he couldn’t hear anything through the muffled sound of his blood rushing in his ears.

Please, no.

He realised he wasn’t breathing properly and someone’s hand was clasping him by the shoulder. He shook it off; he needed to get out of here.

“I need some air, I’ll be back,” he gasped, throwing himself from the booth and pushing through the crowd, going the long way to avoid the path that this apparition would take to get towards his friends.

Reaching the doors at last, he pushed them open and staggered into the car park. He realised, dumbly, that he must look like he’d had far too much to drink, but he couldn’t care.

Why the hell was he here? How had Cas not known that he was here? His new start, his new life, and he still couldn’t escape the old one.

Cas threw himself forward as a wave of dizziness slammed through him, bracing himself with his hands on his knees and forcing himself to breathe properly. By the time his lungs settled into a working pattern, he realised that his cheeks were drenched in tears.

Standing straight, he noticed a wall at the end of the car park and staggered towards it, needing to sit down and calm down, gather his thoughts and work out what the hell he was going to do now.

He sank down onto the wall, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees and keep his steady breathing going. He was in the middle of praying that nobody would follow him when he heard footsteps crossing the tarmac behind him. His panicked mind couldn’t decide who was the worst option for this incoming company to be. He couldn’t explain this; couldn’t talk about it.

His whole body stiffened when a voice spoke softly behind him.

“Cas?”