Joining You
The accident causes the upcoming traffic to come at halt.
"Help".. weakly said by Hee-Yoon, Seulgi's stepmom, whom despite the searing pain from her fractured arm still manage to stay conscious, assessing her daughter's situation as she held back her cry.
"My daughter.. please.. please help her!" Said a litte louder this time.
"I.. I don't think she's breathing. Please.. please help her!" Her pleading echoing through the phone from the floor of the car.
"Jaeyi.." her dad trailed.
"She's just someone you met a couple of months ago. A distraction. A competition at best. I merely just get rid of her. She's been an eyesore anyway." Her father smiles at her but not reaching his eyes.
The panic of Jaeyi from witnessing how the whole situation unfolds, how the paramedic tends to Seulgi as they rolled her to the ambulance sparked a raging storm in her. Jaeyi is someone who's always calm and collected at the surface but deep down, she has always been at edge due to years of emotional neglect from her parents. From the leash her father put on her for control in the mere context of supervision. The last thread of her emotional attachment for her father snapped.
The scene of Seulgi bloodied and unconscious being rolled to the ambulance car kept repeating on her like a broken record, but the way Seulgi's arm fell lifelessly from the strecher devastated her beyond repair.
She's.. she's gone?
Jaeyi for the first time was overcome with her emotion. The sorrow and grief she's felt was new to her. She has never felt this before, not even when their own mother left them after divorce. Her silent sobs turns into a full blown cry. Her entire body trembles from all the emotions she's feeling at once. Shock, guilt, and fury made her head spin.
"Father – no.. Yoo Taejoon." Finally found her voice after swallowing the lump on her throat. Shooting daggers at her father.
"How could you?!" Her breaths are quick and shallow. Her heart hammering on her chest.
"How could you take everything.. from me?!" She muttered under her breath.
"Haa.. haaa.." Gasping for air as if she just ran a half marathon, she starts losing control as her vision blurried. She clawed her neck as if tearing it open to help the air flow.
"You're having a panic attack. It's normal after witnessing such accident. Listen to my voice. Try to focus on it. Inhale slowly through your nose and exhale on your mouth." Her father instructed while tapping his finger on the steering wheel in a rythmic pattern, taking everything lightly. As if its just another Tuesday, another one of his medical conference.
How could you stay calm? How many lives have you taken for you to be this unaffected?
She glared at him. Not caring if it will anger him. Not caring if she will get punished. Living under his roof is already hell. How much worse could it get? She often asks this to herself without knowing there's another pit of hell from losing Seulgi.
"You took.. the life out of me. I'm finally having color in my world. Seulgi.. my Seulgi." She said her name dearly.
"She taught me to find reason to breath. She tethers me to the ground. All my life, I've been floating aimlessly waiting to deflate.. but my Seulgi... haa.."
"My Seulgi.. pulled me back to earth. I can finally breath. The days with her are to look forward to."
"But you.. sick son of a bitch think he has control of everything put her in danger!" The furry within her sends shiver down to her spine. Making her think of something she can never back away. She is her father's daughter after all.
"Yoo Jaeyi! That's no way to talk to your father!" Gripping the steering wheel this time as he speeds up.
The scenery outside was a total opposite of what was going on within their ride. The calmness of the sea, the chirping birds. The light breeze just enough to float flower petals on the air from the fire tree of the side road. She could have enjoyed it with Seulgi once they have the semesteral break. Only if her father weren't a murderer. Only if her father wasn't here. Only if her father was out of the picture.
Without a second thought, Jaeyi grabs the steering wheel, not caring what would happen. Her father fought for control as he tries to push her daughter back but Jaeyi with conviction, never lets go. They swerved each time one of them pulls the steering wheel. For Jaeyi, without Seulgi there is no reason to stay. She's the only reason her plan to unalive herself was put on hold. Intentionally, she turns their car causing to jump off the seadside road, crashing through the water. Even if she's a good swimmer, Jaeyi didn't put an effort to save herself. Didn't take an effort to control her breath under water.
Woo Seulgi.. I'm joining you.