Maria (Lewis)
She meets the person before the last of the bruises he gave to her have healed. “Peggy” with the pronouns ze/zir. Maria had of course abided by the request. It was basic respect after all. Something she knew all about being denied.
It was hard, not to blame herself, even intellectually knowing that she was not at fault. Homeless at fourteen because she refused to abide by her stepfather’s tyrannical rules (and less than chaste affections). In what would be a years long abusive relationship by fifteen because she’d had nowhere else to go and James had been so sweet, offering her a drink and a ride to wherever she’d needed to go and a place to crash when she’d said she didn’t have one. Offering her a sympathetic ear and hugs followed by kisses and wandering hands and promises to be gentle and love her. Offering what Maria thought life was supposed to be like.
But once she was in too deep to just walk away, he started offering his raised voice, quickly followed by his raised hand, and if Maria thought she’d been good at makeup before it was nothing compared to the skills she picked up hiding the bruises he gave her. She’d thought they were in love at the time, that she needed to protect him. She’d realized only a month ago, after three years of braving his temper, that maybe this was not where she should stay. That him hurting her, leaving bruises inside and out, was not ok.
And when she asks Peggy, the clerk at the community women’s center, for help, she is still wearing the last set of bruises James gave to her, hiding them under carefully selected clothes and painstakingly applied makeup. Peggy doesn’t judge, smiles at her more genuinely than James ever did and directs her to the offices that aid battered women seeking safety and assistance with getting back on their feet. When Maria walks up to the door and pauses, unsure of whether or not she should enter, Peggy gently takes her by the hand and walks her inside, introduces her to the day’s receptionist (zir sister, Eliza) and makes sure Maria is as comfortable as possible before returning to the front desk.
It’s only a couple minutes before Eliza calls her to the window, explains what will go on once she goes through the door, gives Maria a couple papers to read and sign as well. Maria thinks of the way Peggy reassuringly squeezed her hand despite barely knowing her, thinks of the way Eliza had seemed pleased to see her slowly relax in the waiting room’s chair, and quickly signs the papers, takes her first step towards freedom.
What happens behind the door is all standard procedure for the center she’s told. She’s offered all sorts of medical tests and screenings, asked about her past, her present, and what she wants for the future. They ask about friends and family that don’t exist and about James and what he did to her and finally they offer her a place in a nearby shelter. She accepts it.
It is late when she gets to the shelter by way of courtesy van from the women’s center. They have a decent sized room full of donated clothes of all sizes. She gets to pick a week’s worth of outfits, two pairs of street shoes, pajamas, and a complete set of dress clothes for things such as job interviews. She can go with the supplies and shopping van tomorrow to pick out intimates and normal sized toiletries. Her room is small and she has no roommate yet, so it’s private too. Despite the unfamiliar surroundings Maria sleeps quite well.
At sunrise Maria wakes, uses the communal bathroom with her set of complimentary travel toiletries and gets dressed in her new favorite outfit, a red sundress with black flats. The shelter is still quiet so she works her way to the small book area she saw yesterday on the way in. She reads for roughly an hour, rising only when she smells the unmistakable scent of bacon and pancakes wafting from the dining area. Stomach grumbling, she closes her book and goes to breakfast. She only realizes that her bruises are showing when the woman next to her offers to let her borrow some cover up if she’s going out today. Maria smiles and accepts.
In the later morning, the shopping van gets ready to go. There’s a goliath of a man in the passenger seat but he seems friendly enough. The two women in the back with her greet him with elation. “Hercules! Where have you been,” they ask. And he launches into stories of all the clients he’s had the past two weeks at his tailoring business. He talks a little about someone named Lafayette, too. Says they might come by later in the week to visit. Maria stays so focused on the gentle giant Hercules that she doesn’t realize who is driving until they approach her after parking outside the Walmart.
“Hey again,” Peggy greets, smiling. “How ya holdin’ up?” Maria shrugs.
“Well enough. I suppose I should stick with you if I want underwear and stuff? Hercules seems nice and all but. . .” Maria trails off. Peggy gently takes her hand again, and Maria squeezes in assurance that the gesture is well received.
“If you’re comfortable coming with me than sure,” ze says. “So, what brands do you prefer?”
The group ends shops for the entire shelter and around noon ends up having lunch at a nearby Wendy’s. Hercules has been regaling the other two women with descriptions of his most recent dress designs while Maria and Peggy have been chatting amiably on the side when it happens.
“You whore!” the too familiar voice rings out. The restaurant goes silent. Maria instinctively makes herself smaller as James advances on their table. “The fuck have you been?” He reaches out to drag her up by her arm when a hand around his wrist stops him.
“You got a problem buddy,” Hercules growls as the other two women shift out of his way. “Because I’ll be happy to solve it for you.” He stands up, towering over James and looking truly intimidating for the first time all day. James switches tactics, knowing belligerence will only get his ass handed to him.
“Maria, please come home baby,” he pleads. “I miss you. I promise I can do better! Just give me one more chance.” Maria looks at Peggy who’s pinning James with a gaze of steel. And then ze turns to Maria, eyes still intense but not judgemental.
“No,” Maria mumbles, voice shaky but tone sure, gaze turned downward in hesitant defiance.
“What’d you say to me,” James asks, temper beginning to flare once more. Maria looks at Peggy again. Ze nods, takes Maria’s hand under the table, and squeezes lightly.
“I said no, Reynolds. Leave me alone,” Maria states, looking him in the eyes. James goes red, eyes wild and body ready to retaliate, but Hercules steps in between them.
“You heard the lady,” he says, slightly flexing the bands of muscle around his arms. “Move along.” James weighs his options, eyes Hercules’ large fists, eyes the employee behind the counter getting ready to call the cops, and beats a hasty retreat. Maria doesn’t realize she’s shaking and crying until Peggy begins to hand her napkins and the other women begin to fuss over her, patting her shoulders and petting her hair and telling her it’s going to be ok. Maria just nods in agreement through her tears.
It takes her half the van ride to calm down. Hercules is driving with the taller of the two women in the passenger seat and the smaller sits on Maria’s left while Peggy sits on her right. Maria lays her head on Peggy’s shoulder and doesn’t move the entire ride back because things don’t seem so scary there. But eventually they make it back to the shelter and the van has to get unloaded. Maria insists on helping because she needs something to do. Hercules heads home after the van is unloaded but Peggy stays for dinner, sits with an overly quiet Maria during and afterwards.
Around ten in the evening when Maria’s yawns have become extra contagious and Peggy is fighting valiantly not to catch them, ze shifts to reach for something on the coffee table, jostling Maria a bit, who stretches and sits up to look at Peggy. “I have to head home or my sisters will get worried,” ze explains, before quickly jotting down a phone number on the coffee table notepad and handing the note to Maria. “There’s my number. Call if you need anything.”
Without thinking, Maria throws her arms around Peggy. Peggy hugs back, letting Maria take comfort in the gentle human contact her life has been so lacking. Ze offers no platitudes or easy comfort. And Maria hangs on for almost a full minute before pulling away with a muttered apology. Peggy smiles gently.
“You don’t have to apologize,” ze says. “I want to help, to be a friend, and if you need a hug, I’ll be happy to give it.” Maria’s thank you is almost inaudible but Peggy manages to catch it and responds by taking Maria’s hands in zir’s and squeezing gently before placing them back on the couch. “I’ll be back tomorrow,” ze says, before dramatically dropping zir voice. “I’m on kitchen duty!” Maria can’t help but laugh in response and Peggy leaves with the sound still ringing in zir ears.