Chapter 7
“Reckless! Completely irresponsible and out of line! Did you even take into consideration how many protocols you broke? Do you even realise what could have happened? You ejected me from my own Jaeger!” Lexa was shaking with rage, with pure anger as she turned to face the young Ranger. Clarke had been silent for a long time, she'd stood like a silent vigil, still in her Drive Suit, the midnight blue helmet tucked under her arm while her golden hair was plastered to her forehead from sweat. Unlike the Marshall who'd been stripped from her drive suit as fast as Anya could once the escape pod had landed. She stood in what Lexa could only describe as scruffy wear, a grey tracksuits with the Ranger Corps logo emblazoned across the breast.
She felt uncomfortable, more so than she usually did in that stuff navy suit. She'd missed her Drive Suit, missed how it felt like a second skin, how it felt like home. And she'd fucked up the first time she'd been back there. Lexa had let off every ounce of anger and frustration at the Cadet, shouting till her throat hurt. But the frustration wasn't all at Clarke, no, it was mostly at herself.
It was not much over an hour after Clarke had ejected her from Heda, and Lexa knew deep, deep down, that she'd done it for good reason. But it had still broken protocol. The LOCCET could have shut down the Jaeger easily, but the newly promoted Ranger had gone off instinct. And Lexa knew exactly how that felt and worked. With a shuddering breath, Lexa finally met Clarke's eyes, those brilliantly blue eyes that seemed to look right into her soul,
“Do you have anything to say Ranger?”
“I acted on my instincts. You had the plasma cannon all ready to empty a full clip into the LOCCET without thinking twice! You're supposed to be the commanding officer, the damn Marshall, and you chased the rabbit! You chased the fucking rabbit Lexa!” Clarke snapped, her gloved hands gripping the edge of her helmet tightly. Lexa watched as the blonde's brow furrowed hard, her words staying strong, yet filled with anger. Clarke's chest was puffed forward, her chin high, like she was born to wear the suit. Lexa knew she was right, she was in charge, the Marshall of Polis Shatterdome. And she chased the Drift rabbit like a rookie at the Academy.
“You felt it, and I damn well did too. But you still chased,” Clarke continued, setting down her helmet on the desk that sat between the two of them. Lexa's shoulders stiffened then, she knew exactly what Clarke was referring to. Their drift, how strong it was, how easily their memories flowed into one. Lexa had felt like Jake Griffin was her father, like she'd been his daughter wanting to do right by him, make him proud. The Marshall had no doubt that Clarke too felt like Costia was her first love, that she'd felt the pain that Lexa had chased. It was an amazing feat that the rookie Ranger had pulled away from such a strong chase and managed to she down the Jaeger by herself. Even if the mech hadn't been in full combat mode, she'd pulled it together and shut down Heda by herself,
“So what? Am I dismissed? Discharged from action even though you and I both know I probably saved each and everyone of the personnel in this ‘dome?” Clarke practically spat the words, her frustration and anger seeping into each syllable she spoke. Lexa sighed, rubbing at her temples harshly. The Marshall knew that outside of the locked office just off the side of the LOCCET control every member of the Shatterdome was listening. She knew that Anya, Raven and most likely Chief Medic Abby all had their ears pressed to the door. Along with every Jaeger team and their crews too. She couldn't let Clarke walk out into that,
“No Ranger. No dismissal, no discharging. You did what any seasoned Ranger would do, acted on instinct not protocol. And I appreciate your quick thinking for my life and everyone in the ‘dome,” Clarke gave a curt nod then, seemingly happy with the Marshall's words. The Ranger grabbed for her helmet, but Lexa's long finger hand atop it stopped her, “I would appreciate your silent on what you saw and felt though, Ranger...Clarke, the news may have portrayed the loss of Ranger Green in a devastating manner, but it was far worse to me then it was to the world,”
Clarke rolled her eyes up to meet Lexa's once more, a look of pure understanding shining back at the Marshall. She nodded again, silently,
“I understand Marshall, completely. I've never felt anything like that before, like, ever. I can't imagine the love you shared with Ranger Green,” for the first time ever Lexa heard the softness, the sorrow in Clarke's tone. One that Lexa knew the Ranger truly felt. She'd seen it, been there in the memory of Jake's funeral, she'd never attended in real life, having been on duty, but their loss in life was a deep parallel,
“Hopefully you never will Clarke,” Lexa murmured, removing her hand from the Drift helmet, turning her back to the blonde as she gazed out of the office window to the now dormant form of Heda,
“You can't promise your immortality Lexa,” Clarke laughed shallowly. Lexa turned to shoot back a quick remark, but found Clarke leaving the office quickly, the many looming faces of the ‘dome staff staring in. Lexa sighed and rolled her eyes as Anya slipped inside with a snap of the door behind her.
“that sounded pretty intense!” Raven laughed as she slip up besides her adoptive sister. Clarke grunted in reply, her gloved hand trying to prize her arms free of the drive suit. Raven watched for a minute before sighing and rolling her eyes, “You're gonna break it, here, let me,” the mechanic quickly began to detach the suit from the impatient Ranger. Clarke was unnaturally silent, letting the elder girl work away, “So….are you dismissed?”
“No. The Marshall commended me on my quick thinking and instincts,” Clarke replied shortly. Raven hummed in reply, carefully detaching the spinal column and setting it aside. Next she worked free the little black box from the base of Clarke's neck. The rest of the suit came away easily then, the main attachment to Clarke's nervous system now gone. Raven didn't need to help much then as Clarke removed her breast plate and lower half, kicking the rest heavy suit away from her body till she could strip out of the circuit suit below. It didn't take long for Clarke to shed the skin tight lycra suit to stand before Raven in her underwear, skin glistening with sweat. Her skin glistened in the fluorescent lighting, but what stood out to Raven the most was the tiny red raw patch on Clarke's left hand shoulder. The mechanic knew that Mark, every drive suit tech and mechanic had been taught what that meant.
“Clarke...how badly did The Marshall chase the rabbit?” Raven asked sheepishly, inching towards her sister. The blonde shot Raven a look, she hadn't said a word about the Drift. She'd promised Lexa she wouldn't, how could the mechanic know? The Rangers mind swirled with questions, with confusion till she realised there was only one way she'd know. Gingerly Clarke reached to her shoulder, her left shoulder, remembering that she'd grabbed Lexa's controls when the Marshall had gone chasing. Clarke could feel the raised part of her skin, tracing the lines that had burnt there from the circuit suit.
It was only small, nothing to even brag about, but it was there. A lasting mark, a reminder of that dangers being a Ranger still had, even when not in full combat. Raven reached forward, then hesitated as she watched Clarke's face drop, knowing full well she was reminded of the same scars her father had carried before he died.
“Medal of honor, right? That's what Dad...That's what dad always said,” Clarke muttered low, retracting her hand from the fresh mark, “I'm going to hit the showers, before anything else fucks up,” the blonde grumbled, heading to the far side of the suit room. Raven watched with sad eyes as her sister disappeared from view, heading to the Ranger shower block. The mechanic set about collecting Clarke's discarded Drive Suit armour and circuit undersuit, carefully replacing them onto one of the manikins that lined the circular rooms walls. Raven couldn't help but admire the other suits within the room, from the Pauna Rangers grey and black camo armour, to the first green of Trikru. Then came the Natblinda armour, so similar to Marshall Woods’s own Range gear, that Raven wasn't sure at first. As black as the night, with stripes of red and white running down the sides and across the breast plates, the symbols of Natblinda was emulated largely on the front. A phoenix, painted in white.
Raven knew all the Jaegers had their own symbols, Natblinda had the phoenix, Trikru was a biohazard symbol of orange and red and even Pauna, with her old Rangers, still had a hulking gorilla as it's mascot. Raven knee Heda used to be the flame sword in the night, painted red across the Jaegers chest plate, they called it The Commanders sigil, and everyone knew they were safe when they saw that come onto their holo-screens. When the KEAS played everyone knew Heda was there. It was all part of their rock star lives, and the council's original plan to get the public behind the Jaeger programme. Have a mascot, have the public cheer for something, to worship false metal gods as they protected you from the sea monsters. Raven couldn't help but smirk, it was so silly, treating these people, these Rangers, who were just as broken as anyone else in the world, like they were superstars. Crazy even.
But as the young mechanic hung Clarke's Drive Suit besides the Marshall’s, she couldn't help but wonder, what mascot would Heda have now?
The hot water was like a scorching cleanse against Clarke's skin. It was a God send, the hot shower closed off away from the rest of the ‘dome. It may have been a communal shower room, but she was alone. And Clarke was revealing in it. Alone in a room with a hot shower and so much space to breath.
She'd never imagined how difficult it would be to breath in that damn suit. She'd waited so long to put it on, to feel what her father had done, to slip into a strong drift, that Clarke hadn't even thought about how tight and constricted it would be. She'd felt like she could breath, like she was suffocating until the Marshall had begun to run. Then it all came like second nature. She had to pull the Marshall out of the rabbit hole and make sure the Canon didn't go off. She hadn't even considered the aftermath, of what could have happened to her position, she just thought about saving everyone in the ‘dome.
Bracing her hands against the tiled walls, Clarke dipped her head flush under the hot water, letting herself be lost in the constant sound of the water flow. Everything became an echo in her mind as the water flowed around her, her mind flashing through the memories from the Drift. Of her own life experiences and what she'd felt from the Marshall. The deepest most hidden memories the Marshall had buried within her. And Clarke had been privy to them all.
The blonde sucked in a breath as she remembered the pain and sorrow that had come before Lexa had fell down the hole, chasing after a Ranger who'd been dead for years.
Clarke's fists found the tiles harshly as she grunted in pain. She was angry, frustrated and confused. She was the one who was supposed to fuck up, she was the one who was meant to chase the rabbit. Not the stone cold Marshall, the damn Commander. She punched again, and again, and again roaring loudly as she did,
“Ranger?” Clarke's body stilled as the familiar voice floated into the shower room.
Lexa, fuck, she thought, pressing her forehead to the chilled tiles. Clenching her eyes shut, Clarke hoped her mind was still fogged from the Drift, that she was just imagining the Marshall's voice,
“Clarke, look, I'm sorry about the Drift. I..it was all my fault, I made a rookie move and tried to blame you, I'm...I'm…”
“You're sorry, okay, it's cool Marshall. Happens to the best of us. Clearly,” Clarke grumbled, she wasn't going to turn around, she wasn't going to face the Marshall. She just wanted to stand there, with what was left of the hot water and forget about the failed drift.
“can I get in here? Any hot water left?” Lexa was still there, still talking. Clarke could only muster a grunt in reply, the blonde decided she'd leave before the Marshall could get another word in. She'd pushed away from the wall, her hand going for the shower switch, when those fingers slid against her shoulder, against the Drive Suit burn. She flinched away, turning her body instinctively to put the injury away from Lexa's hand. Which only led her to face the Marshall, the very, very naked Marshall.
They stared at one another. The only sounds coming from the still going shower. Clarke was determined not to be the first to break the stare, she wouldn't look down at the Marshalls body first, she wouldn't, she...she did. The Ranger was drinking in the muscled, lithe form of her commanding officer with hungry eyes. From the curve of her perky breasts to the flat plains of her sculpted abs, the trimmed dark patch between her legs and then those legs, long and muscular, running all the way down. Clarke's bring at caught, goosebumps tickled her skin as she realised she wasn't the only one starring. Her cerulean eyes flicked back up to Lexa's face, her cheeks picked as watched Lexa bite her bottom lip,
“Fuck.”