It was Franky’s third day of freedom and Bridget had gone back to work. She had spent most of the day reading outside in the sun, barefoot as she lay on the grass and soaked up the wonder that was Bridget’s garden. It was still an assault on Franky’s senses to see the greenness of the grass, the intense pink colour of the creeping bougainvillea and to smell the freshness of the autumn air. Bridget was obviously a gardener, Franky thought as she marveled at the little oasis at the back of Bridget’s house, a stark contrast to the oppressive, constrained views of the four grey walls to which she had become accustomed of the exercise yard.
Franky, having demolished the book she had chosen, now wandered back inside, empty coffee cup in hand, to return the book to the study and to select a new one. She was in awe at the number of books that lined Bridget’s walls and smiled as she thought to herself that she would never need a library subscription.
As she sat at the study desk leaning back in Bridget’s chair, she imagined herself sitting at a desk of her own, maybe in a law firm one day. A glossy brochure, partly obscured by other papers on the desk caught her eye. Franky pulled it out saw the words “2016 Australian Forensic Psychology Conference, Perth WA” that were blazened across the top.
As Franky flicked through the brochure, she smiled to find that the entire back page was devoted to Bridget. Fascinated, Franky started to read her biography that was set to the right of Bridget’s photo.
“Recipient of the Dean’s Award of merit in her masters year of psychology at the University of Sydney, Westfall turned down many positions in private practice early in her career to embark upon what became a highly successful pioneer pilot programme addressing recidivism in young women. Working with fellow graduate Riley Allstrom, this groundbreaking programme became integrated into the New South Wales prison systems and is still considered the benchmark upon which many corrections facilities base their policies. Westfall’s impressive career spans significant experience in the area of corrections, recidivism and incarcerated women, having gained acclaim both nationwide and overseas. She is considered one of the most pre-eminent psychologists in her field of practice. Westfall currently works in both private practice and for the Department of Corrections, Victoria.”
“Shit” Franky thought. “Gidge doesn’t do things by halves does she”. She knew Bridget was smart and switched on, but she had no idea she was this revered professionally.
Franky then heard the front door and looked up at the clock in the study, which read just after 4.00pm. Bridget wasn’t due home for another hour and panic flashed through Franky. “What if it was someone else?” She presumed only Bridget had a key. “But what about Bridget’s family. Maybe it was one if them… Did Bridget even have any family?? Of Course She must…..I’m not even really meant to be here… What if the parole board finds out I’m here?” the thoughts raced through Franky’s mind at a million miles an hour as the rational side of her mind played ping pong with the irrational flight or flight side that was coming into full swing.
“Frraannnnnnky”, she heard Bridget half sing from what she guessed was the kitchen.
“Hiiiii Gidge, I’m in the study”, Franky called out, relieved.
Bridget appeared in the doorway smiling at Franky “Thank fuck it’s you” Franky blurted out.
“Well that’s not exactly the welcome I was expecting. Who did you think it was going to be?” Bridget said smiling, but a bit perplexed.
“Hmm I dunno”, Franky replied slightly embarrassed by her sudden moment of panic as Bridget walked over and bent down, planting a kiss on Franky’s lips.
“Finish up early?? Skiving off again?” Franky joked.
“Not exactly… Mondays I work in private practice so I can set my own hours really … my last client of the day cancelled so I thought I’d come home .. aaaaaand I thought it you were up to it, you might like to come to hot yoga with me?” Bridget asked expectantly, her eyes sparkling as she flashed a smile at Franky.
“Hot yoga.” Franky said, emphasis on the word hot. “I think I like the sound of that, she added as she winked at Bridget. “What is it exactly?” Franky then said, laughing
“Its yoga, done in the sweltering heat, its hot, its humid its sweaty.. and its additive but so so good” Bridget responded.
“Ohh yeah, sounds like something else” Franky said playfully, winking at Bridget as Bridget shook her head and smiled. “Yeah …I’m keen Gidge. I don’t have any yoga clothes though”.
“I’ve got heaps, you can wear something of mine, I’m a bit of a yoga fanatic”
“ohh are you now? That’s something I wouldn’t have picked about you” Franky responded playfully.
“I love it, nothing like practising at the end of a day to unpack and file everything away” Bridget remarked.
“What have you got there?” Bridget’s attention now turning to the brochure Franky had just put down.
“Oh I’m just reading up on you” Franky responded as she got up off the chair and walked over to Bridget.
“That was from a conference I spoke at last week in Perth” Bridget said casually as she kicked off her boots and placed them in the hallway.
“Yeah I saw” Franky said “and you didn’t just speak at it Gidge, you were the fucking keynote speaker”. Bridget smiled in response and raised her eyebrows playfully.
“Here, come with me and I’ll find you some yoga crops and a top”, Bridget said as she walked towards her bedroom, unbuttoning her shirt as she walked.
Following Bridget up to the bedroom, Franky, trying to sound casual asked “So who was this Riley chick that you set up the programme with?”
Bridget smiled and thought better of having any mileage with this one “Riley was male and he was a guy I went through psych with” she responded “ but we did date early on in uni… but not for long”, Bridget added, amused as Franky screwed up her face in response.
“Ahhh, so you haven’t always been into girls Gidge?” Franky probed.
“Well… I don’t know if I was ever into guys really. I mean I dated them but it never really felt right – I just thought that maybe I wasn’t really into those men, and did go through a time when I thought that maybe I just wasn’t really into sex full stop.” Bridget said as she rummaged through her drawer of yoga clothes.
“Well that would have been a fuckin’ tragic thought”, Franky said, as she kicked off her jeans, leaving them in a crumpled, inside out heap on the floor.
“But then I met someone and I just felt an attraction to her. She was the first woman I had a relationship with”, Bridget said as she tossed Franky some crops and a singlet and bent down to pick up Franky’s crumpled jeans off the floor, turning them the right way and placing them on the bed.
Looking Franky in the eye, Bridget added “So now you’ve got an answer to that question… that you asked many months ago”.
Franky remembered the question well. “Hmmmm. So now I do….. So how did you come out, who was the first person that you told?” Franky asked curiously, pulling the tight fitting singlet over her head, only thinking after the words had left her mouth that it might have been a bit forward to ask. She was still new at all of this relationship stuff, she thought.
But Bridget was unperturbed. “My sister Caroline – we were watching this show on TV, you were probably too young to remember it, called Pacific Drive I loved one of the main characters called Zoe. Anyway, it was ground breaking in its time and a pretty big thing…the first lesbian kiss on Aussie TV and it was quite the thing to talk about” Bridget said, as she struggled to pull on her crops, balancing on one leg. “ It wasn’t just the show, but I think my sister’s reaction to the kiss that made me come out – to her first at least”.
“And what did she say?” Franky asked.
“I will never forget the look on her face, she turned to me and said “Ummm yah Bridge… I called that about a year ago?”, Bridget said with a smile as Franky responded “I like this Caroline already”.
“So how were your folks with it all?” Franky asked, following Bridget to the kitchen.
“They didn’t know for a while. I mean… it didn’t tell them for a few years.. it was a bit different coming out 20 years ago Franky. They are pretty conservative, so they struggled with it for a while”, Bridget said as grabbed two bottles of frozen water from the fridge.
“We need frozen water??… how hot does it get?” Franky asked, crinkling up her forehead. Bridget smiled, pausing for effect before she responded “pretty fucking hot” and laughing at Franky’s wide eyed response.
“Anyway… my parents eventually came around. I’m sure they had always just dreamed of me getting married and having husband, kids, white picket fence and being doting grandparents”
“You didn’t want to have kids?” Franky asked.
“Yeah, I did… I guess I just never met the right person” Bridget responded, as she grabbed her leather bag duffel and packed into it some spare clothes, including Franky’s jeans that she hadn’t noticed Bridget had taken from the bed. “But it’s a bit late for my parents now – my father died a few years ago and my mother now has Alzheimer’s”.
“I’m sorry Gidge.. I didn’t realize” Franky said, suddenly worried she had said something wrong, reaching out to touch Bridget’s arm as she stepped closer towards her.
“No, no its fine Franky, my Dad was so sick, him dying was almost a relief for us. And my mum… well she has good days and bad, but I try to see her most Sundays” Bridget responded reassuringly. “And it’s not too late for me, and that’s the important thing”, she added smiling at Franky.
“What’s the clothes for?” Franky asked gesturing to the bag Bridget had just packed. “you’ll need a change of clothes… and that reminds me, I’ll grab some plastic bags on the way out to put our yoga stuff in when we are finished”.
“Are you for real??” Franky asked… “errmmmm…. maybe I’ll stay home” she added feigning fear.
“No, I’m sure you will love it. It will be .... a cleansing experience” Bridget said, recalling her first hot yoga class where for most of the class she felt like she was about to pass out.
“And… we can pick up take away from my favorite place on the way home – its Thai” Bridget said smiling “I know you like to have motivation… as long as you like Thai that is”, remembering one of their first encounters in the exercise yard.
As they walked out to the car, Bridget pondered. There were so many more things Bridget wanted to tell Franky, acutely aware that she knew such specific details about Franky which would normally stay guarded, shut away and cocooned from day to day life in the early months of a relationship. She wanted Franky to know about her life, her loves, what made her smile and what made her cry. She also wanted Franky to know about the things that had nearly broken her and the heartbreaking and life-changing abuse she had suffered as a child from someone in whom she and her family had an absolute trust. But the time would come to share those with Franky, along with the time to create memories of their own.