He knows.
They tuck little Ashley in together at night. Lucas kisses her forehead, then Riley. They tell her to have sweet dreams and retire to their bed. To Ashley, it's the picture perfect family. To Lucas?
It's a mirage.
Because he knows.
As she tosses and turns all night while he sleeps next to her, except he doesn't. He listens as she lays restlessly. She isn't happy like this, and she never truly will be.
And he knows.
The next day, when her eyes light up, because she got a call from Maya, and she wants to come visit her best friend, she's noticeably happier. She cleans the house even better than when his parents come to visit. He helps enthusiastically. He wants her to be happy. She spends an hour just picking out what shoes to wear, and he keeps telling her Maya won't care. But she freaks out, just like she does every time and he has to convince her not to go out and buy a new pair.
An hour getting dressed, you'd think she was getting ready for a date. She even sends Ashley next door to her friends house. She doesn't complain, of course. Five years old, she doesn't know what Maya and Riley mean to each other.
But he knows.
When Maya enters she's just radiating with happiness. And they hug as if they haven't seen each other in years, even though it's been a month at most. Riley starts to ramble on about every little thing that's been happeneing lately and Maya smiles as she listens. And when Maya mentions that she's starting to get recognition for her art work, Riley is glowing she's so proud. She bounces up and down and smiles and wraps her arms around her every ten seconds for no reason. She uses every excuse in the book, hell, the volume to get him out of the room so they can be alone, even if it's just for a minute.
He even pretends not to notice the awkward pause that occurs when he accidentally brings up the night she thought he had proposed.
But he knows.
No one told him, he figured it out.
Well, more like just after the reception, on the way to their honeymoon, he accidentally picked up Rileys phone instead of his own while she was in the bathroom and she'd received and email from Maya that simply said I'm sorry. It didn't take long to figure out what she was talking about, with about twelve seconds of searching. His entire marriage crashed a few hours after it happened. But when Riley returned he didn't mention it. Not the subtle hint of sadness in her eyes, not the faint glow of disappointment she gave off, and certainly not the email. He just let them start their lives together, the one that never should've happened.
And the entire time, he knew.
"Lucas? Can you get my phone for me?"
"Lucas? Get us something to eat, please?"
"Lucas? Run to the store? I think we're running low on milk."
He knows full well Riley just went shopping, and also that she literally could not care less about the amount of milk present in their home, but he doesn't call her out. He doesn't even check the fridge before he leaves. If he did, he would've seen the unopened container of milk inside. He just gets dressed, and leaves. Because he knows.
But what he doesn't know is what happens while he's gone.
It's immediate. As soon as they hear the door close they're connected. Rileys lips skips Mayas mouth altogether and latch on to her neck, reaching for the button on her pants simultaneously.
"What if he comes back?" Maya breathes out, reaching for the hem of Rileys shirt. She pulls it up over her head, and Riley answers in the time she has to be away from Mayas skin.
"Let him." She grumbles, and she's back on her neck. And Maya doesn't complain.
He takes his time. If he'd known what they were doing, maybe he wouldn't have, but he doesn't know, so he strolls casually through each aisle, picking up things he knows they need, and even treats himself to some ice cream before he heads home. He knows how Riley feels about Maya, and maybe she feels the same way, even after all this time, but he doesn't know this. He doesn't know Riley is capable of cheating. But love is funny like that. You'll do anything for it.
Rileys in the shower when he gets home. "I got the milk." He yells when he hears the water running. Everything feels off, like he's showed up at his own home, but in a different universe. He sets down the bags, mostly miscellaneous things, and starts to put them away.
And he doesn't get an answer.
Riley steps as quietly as she can into the bathroom and strips, stepping in the shower with Maya, who's very clearly confused.
"Lucas is home." She whispers. Maya simply nods. This isn't the first time they've almost been caught but they haven't been before, what could possibly change today? And when Maya smirks at her, she knows where this is going.
No, this time, he doesn't know. He doesn't know why Rileys voice is shaky when he finally gets a reply from her. He doesn't know why she's in the shower so long, and he just can't seem to figure out where to put this second carton of milk. There's no room in the fridge next to the first one.
"You have to stop if you don't want us to get caught." Riley begs weakly.
Maya simply pulls her closer.
"Riley, there's no room for the milk. Lucas yells, defeated. He puts it on the counter and goes to change clothes in their bedroom.
"I'll get it." She yells, before pressing her face into Mayas shoulder to quiet the next sound she makes. Maya is smirking all the while. Lucas can't do this to her, not the way she does.
He takes off his boots, jeans, shirt, all before he sees it. at the foot of the bed, almost underneath, he notices something. Something that definently doesnt belong to him, and doesnt belong to Riley.
When you live a married, domestic life, you never expect you significant other is cheating. But once you come across evidence that they are, well, it seems so obvious.
"You don't wanna leave a mark do you?" Riley gasps out. Maya releases her lips from her neck just long enough to say "Of course I do." Before she continues.
It stares at him. Mocks him.
What did you expect?
You've known for years
This is what happens when you turn your back.
He redresses immediately. He can't be in the same home as her until he clears his head.
Maya has to let Riley bite her shoulder to stop her final scream from becoming anything more than a whimper.
"Riley, I'm going for a walk." Lucas yells mindlessly.
She doesn't bother to reply.
***
When he returns, it's gone. Along with any other evidence it was ever there.
Except for the bad make up job over his wife's neck, but he doesn't mention it.
They continue on. Riley cooks dinner, they sit around the table to eat, watch a movie as a family, tuck Ashley in to bed together. A fairly normal day, except it isn't. Because he knew his wife didn't love him the way he loved her, but he never thought she was capable of cheating.
"So, what's going on with Maya? I didn't really get to talk to her myself." He asks casually. It's a question he has to ask every time. Riley never wants him around when Maya is.
He now knows why.
Maybe it's his fault. A good relationship is built on communication. Maybe he shouldve told her he saw the email. Maybe he shouldve mentioned how he noticed when Riley looked just past him throughout their wedding.
Maybe he should'nt have ignored the signs he noticed before they ever even got married.
He did this to himself. He knew. He always knew. He just never wanted to admit it. And now he's trapped himself in a loveless marriage. He's trapped her from being with the woman she loves, and he's trapped himself from finding whoever it is he's truly meant to be with.
He knew, he always knew. He just never said a word.
"Same old, same old." She waves off his question, and turns over in their shared bed. He never gets to know. Riley won't tell him, and he's never around when Maya is. It's like she doesn't want to share her with him. And he knows why.
"Goodnight." She mumbles behind her. He replies absentmindedly and turns over as well.
She sleeps fine tonight.
He doesn't sleep at all.