It's Okay, I Couldn't Sleep Anyway--Spanna
Spencer Hastings couldn't sleep. Every time she closed her eyes, her mind conjured up images of Hanna, hanging from the bell tower, dead. She'd offered to let the blonde stay with her, but she'd refused, and Spencer didn't press. She and Hanna had been tiptoeing around their mutual attraction for a month now, and it had all come to a head last night. Whether Hanna regretted it and was avoiding Spencer, or she just truly wanted to be alone, she didn't know. But now she was wishing she had insisted, not for Hanna's sake, but her own. Finally, she got out of bed and slipped on her coat and a pair of shoes. She needed to see Hanna.
---
Hanna sat on Lucas's couch, still in Spencer's sweats, swirling around a glass of wine. She was staring at the tv, but it wasn't on. Her thoughts were a whirlwind, cycling between the kiss she'd shared with Spencer in the motel room, to being pinned down and shocked in a shack, to being picked up in the middle of the road by Mary Drake. It was all too much to handle. She looked at her bare finger. It was crazy that only yesterday morning she'd been breaking off her engagement. She wished she had taken Spencer up on her offer of a place to stay. She'd wanted to prove to herself that she could be alone, but the dark had proven to be a formidable enemy. A knock on the door caused her to startle and spill the wine. She cursed under her breath.
"Just a minute!" she called, suddenly grateful that Lucas only had white wine. Red would have been impossible to clean up. Throwing a towel on the spill, she went to answer the door.
"Spencer," she breathed out, surprised to see her standing there in her pajamas. The brunette shifted awkwardly.
"Can I come in?" she asked. Hanna nodded and stepped to the side, letting her friend in. Spencer noticed that Hanna was still wearing the sweats she'd given her back at her house. She watched as Hanna closed the door and checked the lock three times.
"So, uh, what are you doing here?" Hanna asked, painfully aware of the awkwardness. She wasn't sure if it was being caused by their kiss or her kidnapping. Spencer bit her lip.
"Can we sit?" she asked. Hanna nodded again. Spencer moved to sit on the couch, then noticed the towel.
"Oh, right. Sorry. Spilled some wine. You want a glass?" she offered. Spencer nodded and followed Hanna into the kitchen. Hanna poured Spencer a glass and then refilled her own and joined her at the kitchen table.
"I'm sorry to come over so late. I hope I didn't wake you up," Spencer said. Hanna shook her head.
"It's okay. I couldn't sleep anyway," she admitted. Spencer's eyes flickered up at her in concern, then refocused on the table. Hanna sighed.
"I'm okay," she insisted. Spencer nodded, still not looking at her. Hanna downed her wine, waiting for Spencer to say something. She didn't.
"Spence, it's three in the morning. Not that I’m not happy to see you, but what are you doing here?" Hanna asked finally. Keeping her gaze on the table, Spencer began to speak.
"There's something we didn't tell you," she whispered. Hanna waited for her to elaborate, knowing that prodding her along wouldn't do any good.
"After... After we found out that you were missing, we came back to Rosewood. We got a text from AD, leading us to the bell tower. We walked in and... We found... They must have been planning this for some time because they had a doll... A human sized doll... It had..." Spencer trailed off, her voice thick with tears. She cleared her throat and continued.
"It had a blonde wig, and it was wearing the clothes we'd seen you in an hour ago. But the worst part was, it had a mask of your face. A good mask, not like those masks Ali made. It was latex and it looked... So real. For a few minutes, before we could get it down... I thought..." she stopped, too overcome with tears to continue. Hanna carefully walked around the table to hug her friend. Spencer clung to her, crying.
"It's okay, I'm okay. I’m alive," Hanna whispered. Spencer's next words were so quiet, Hanna had to strain to hear them.
"All those years ago, when I thought I found Toby's body... I thought that was the worst thing that could ever happen to me. I was wrong."
Hanna closed her eyes, hugging Spencer tighter. All of the pain and fear she'd felt in that shack paled in comparison to what Spencer must have felt. She couldn't even imagine... She would rather suffer one hundred shocks than see what she believed was Spencer's body.
"I just really needed to see you," Spencer finally said, pulling away and wiping her eyes.
"I know you said you wanted to be alone--"
"Stay," Hanna interrupted. She saw a spark of hope in Spencer's eyes.
"Are you sure?" she asked. Hanna nodded.
"There's a reason I was sitting in the living room with a glass of wine. I was stupid to think I'd be able to sleep alone tonight," she admitted, leading Spencer to the bedroom.
"Do... Do you want to talk about it? I mean, I dumped all of my stuff on you. It's only fair that I listen to you. If you want, of course," she stuttered, clearly flustered. Hanna smiled a genuine smile at seeing the normally composed Spencer struggle for words. She slipped under the blankets and gestured for Spencer to do the same. Deciding that the darkness would be bearable with Spencer next to her, she flicked off the lights. Then, she turned on her side to face the brunette, thankful that Spencer wouldn't be able to make out her face. She felt Spencer take the same position.
"I thought I was going to die in there. He soaked me with freezing cold water and then held me down to shock me with... With this thing. I don't even know what it was. He'd ask me who killed Charlotte, and when I said I didn't know, he'd shock me. My shoulders, my back, my hips, my stomach... Nowhere was safe. One time... He held it to my back for so long I could smell my own skin burning," Hanna whispered, squeezing her eyes tightly shut against the tears. Spencer cautiously inched closer and gently touched Hanna's hand. The blonde gripped Spencer's hand back. Once again, Spencer cursed their acceptance of Hanna's refusal to go to the hospital.
"I was so afraid. All I wanted was to go back to that stupid motel room and kiss you again."
Spencer scooted closer, close enough that she could feel Hanna's erratic breathing on her neck.
"I wish I'd never walked out of that room," Spencer whispered.
"It's not your fault. You're right, for AD to have had a mask like that, they had been planning this for a while," Hanna said before she even realized what she was saying. Both girls let the idea sink in. It was terrifying, the thought that AD had been preparing to--what?
"But why? What if I had confessed instead of you?" Spencer asked. Hanna shuddered. While she would rather endure the physical torture AD put her through than the emotional agony of thinking Spencer was dead, she couldn't stand the thought of Spencer undergoing that treatment.
"I don't know. Maybe they made masks of all of us," Hanna suggested. Maybe they always planned on targeting me, she didn't add. Spencer seemed to hear her unspoken thought, and raised her free hand to gently stroke Hanna's cheek.
"I'm not leaving you alone again. I promise," she said. Hanna smiled weakly.
"Good. You'd have to pry me off of you anyway," she joked. Spencer chuckled.
"Can I kiss you?" She asked quietly. Hanna nodded, then realized Spencer couldn't see it.
"Yeah," she said. Spencer leaned in and gently pressed her lips to Hanna's. The blonde deepened the kiss, moving her hands to tangle in Spencer's hair. It was only when they needed oxygen that they pulled apart, both breathing heavily.
"You should try to sleep," Spencer said, feeling her own eyelids getting heavy. Hanna nodded and laid her head on Spencer's chest. Spencer immediately put an arm around the blonde, their fingers automatically lacing together when they met.
"I'm really glad you couldn't sleep earlier," Hanna whispered. Spencer smiled and kissed Hanna's forehead.
"Me too."