"Mircalla von Karnstein,"
Just as Carmilla was ready to punch the upload button a voice from behind her startled her enough for her to flinch and stop any movement immediately. Wasn't usually Laura the one with all the twitching and flinching going on? If it was anyone else but the person this voice belonged to Carmilla would've murdered them for talking to her using this name.
"Don't you even dare thinking about putting this on," the voice spoke again, but not lacking any of its persistence. There was no need to explain what 'this' meant, Carmilla knew exactly what they were referring to. And damn, if the vampire couldn't but be surprised she didn't notice the human. And speaking of, how long was she standing there (and spying on her) anyway and since when can she be so damn sneaky? Carmilla huffs and lets go of the mouse, leaning back into the chair not moving any further inch otherwise.
Fine, have it your way, human!
Said human then, she could feel, came closer- step by step. Like a tiger stalking its prey, and why Carmilla suddenly felt like the prey, she has no idea. And honestly, she's ways to tired to even think about it.
Then suddenly, the nearing footsteps came to an halt. Carmilla still hadn't made an attempt to turn or stand up from t where she was sitting in her chair. No, she just remained rooted to the spot. If Laura wanted to give her a speech -and Carmilla knew her well enough by now to know how those started- listen to her rant was the least she could do for her after all that happened.
"I might still be a naive and provincial girl," Laura said. Purposefully Carmilla thinks, and shakes her head in amusement, clearly remembering that night all too well. Just the usually feeling of anger seemed to have almost subsided. And wow, that's another new. Not that she was still holding it against Laura, ok, she kind of did, but that is beside the point. The point is she also remembers the feeling she had when she was alone with Laura during those days, despite them being not the easiest for her with being tied up and denied her life elixir and all that.
"But I still know what I wanted, what I want. I am not stupid just because I am trying to be good or turn everything in the right direction, no matter how much you think I am. Well, to a certain extend at least, and don't you deny it," Carmilla flinched at the last remark. She never thought Laura was stupid, quite the contrary actually, but yes, she sometimes thinks she is just ways too naive. But also, she would be lying if this wasn't a thing that attracted her to Laura, that she had a kind of pureness to her she never witnessed before. Though this might be slightly arguable with Laura having killed Voldenberg; she's still an angel compared to her, the vampire thinks.
Laura took Camilla's lack of protest as confirmation and cue to continue.
"And you are right, Carmilla," now that was a surprise to the brunette, who still sat there motionless, but Laura knew she was listening to every word she had to say. The human shook her head, "God knows you are right, I am naive to think that in this world, in this place we could even stand a chance to change everything for the better. This thought was doomed to begin with. But really, does it make me stupid in any way?" Laura mused loudly running her fingers through her hair. Because no matter the situation she above all vallues Carmilla's opinion on her and things she does the most.
"Laura," her name left the vampire's lips in a whisper, yet still sounded so very loud in the otherwise quiet room.
"No, Carmilla, it's fine. It really is. I should've seen it coming, I really...,"
"But you tried anyway," Carmilla interrupted quickly her, "and that is...that is you, Laura, that is one thing I fucking admire about you, ok?" and really; Carmilla doesn't know why she isn't facing Laura by now, "you don't give a damn about odds or whatever, you just do it anyway. And yes, it is naive, but it'd be infinitely more tragic if you let it stop you from trying to make this world a better place despite what the chances are or aren't,"
Laura swallowed. She didn't know what to say, caught somewhat off guard by Carmilla's words.
"If you let it turn you into me," the raven haired girl added almost as an afterthought.
"Hey, hey, don't you even go there," Laura immediately protested. She was close to closing the remaining distance, and lay a comforting hand on Carmilla's shoulder or pull her up into her arms. Fully aware that this most likely would've pissed the other somewhat off she decided against it. Studying Carmilla's body language, she noticed that her shoulders appeared to have slumped forward.. A small thing, but it almost made the blonde's heart break.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You made it seem easy, like I wasn't scared."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I know, Laura, I know, I am a heroic vampire, the role model of the un-dead...,"
"Not why I said it," Laura hissed. She wished Carmilla would just turn around, quite frankly talking to her back was kind of more than impersonal at this rate. "I understand why you did what you did,"
"You mean not did...," Carmilla added, laughing cynically.
"Carmilla!" and was that a growl coming from Laura? Yes, Carmilla was almost positive it was. And under other circumstances it would've lead Carmilla to all but jump the petite blonde's bones, not now though.
"I think I owe you an apology. I have no right to demand to automatially lunch yourself in front of me just because you're my girlfriend," Laura stubbornly refused to use past tense, she just couldn't, it hurt her to much to acknowledge that truth, it is in fact a lot harder than acknowledging the truth that she killed a man despite her swearing to herself to never be a part of the bad side of this world. The moment still sends shivers down her spine, shivers of angst and fear and no matter how shocked she was about herself, there was not a single moment she ever regretted to have killed Voldenberg in order to save Carmilla.
"But isn't this what the perfect vampire girlfriend would've done? Like a shiny knight in armor? Save the human? Save her...love..." Laura sucks in a sharp breath. Did Carmilla just say love ? She honestly wasn't sure whether she should comment on it or not.
Well, Laura thought, two can play this game. "Yes, it might, that still doesn't give the human the right to demand her love to do that," this time it was Carmilla's turn to suck in a sharp breath. If it wasn't such a sad, almost tragic situation it would've been funny. They both know, it's the most possibly most stupid moment for a love profession but here they are. And yet again it just fits so perfectly to them.
After that a heavy silence hung in the air. Neither of the two woman really knowing what to say.
"It doesn't mean I would've let anything happen to you," Carmilla's voice finally cuts off the quietness
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I know you didn't just do it for me."
"Don't be stupid, of course I did it for you."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I know," Laura whispers, she should've trusted Carmilla. She knows she never would've let anything happen to her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I won't let you hurt her."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Just as she didn't let anything happen to Carmilla when it was her who had the heroic 'save-your-love-moment'. Some things don't need to be said, it appears this is just one of those things.
Looking back, yes, they were both pretty much idiots and let the lack of communiciation come inbetween them. But that is a sign of how much they are just like so many other couples, where both are humans. Some things are just the same, no matter what. And really, it is kind of refreshing to know how normal they still were, despite being everything but that.
"Look," Laura begins again, "I know that everything won't automatically go back to normal by tomorrow, hell, I don't even know if it ever will, but what I do know is that...that I want this to eventually go back normal again. No matter how long it will take. And from the little speech you just gave," Laura's voice now layered with a hint of teasing, "you didn't sound exactly opposed to the idea of giving it another try," which also answered Carmilla's silent question about how long Laura stood in the room- she heard everything she just recorded in her short video she planned on putting online, in which apologiting to Laura played a huge part.
She heard Carmilla's apologies.
She heard Carmilla talking about regretting a lot of things.
She heard Carmilla say sorry probably more often than she's ever heard anyone say that word in such a short amount of time.
She heard Carmilla's voice break at the mention of the moment Carmilla quit it and stormed out of the room.
She heard Carmilla say that this was one of the, if not the biggest mistake of her life (dead or alive).
But most importantly, she heard the way Carmilla finished the video saying how much she loves and missed Laura and that she'd do anything to make things ok again.
"I do," Carmilla said eventually.
"Woah, slow down, isn't it a bit too quick for that just yet?" the human grins, trying to lighten the mood.
"Laura," Carmilla's voice every bit serious as she is, "I mean it. I want this, us to work again, but you know that this will be fucking hard with everything that went down and you know our clashing personalities and all th...,"
"Oooookaaaaay, you stop right there. I know we don't have the most matching personalities or opinions, but honestly, I think this is kind of why it just might work- why it worked quite well before. We both like being challenged and this might just the be the kind of challenge we need. Not that I am looking forward to arguments over silly things with you, and I know we will have those, but I'd rather take that than nothing at all," Laura's voice leaving no doubt about that she means every single word.
Carmilla swallowed, loud enough for Laura to register it, she has yet again rendered her speechless. And after some moments of lack of response Laura steps that bit closer, almost hovering over Carmilla now. She braced her hands against her knees and bend down, her head now close to making contact with the crock of Carmilla's right shoulder, close enough for the vampire to feel a puff of air being breathed against it. Carmilla shivers. Never was she not exceptionally receptive of Laura being so close to her, a triumphant smile crosses Laura's lips. She just loved having this effect on the vampire. Knowing it still worked only added to her excitement, though that was no exactly something she expected to have changed.
Laura is not sure if she is being too forward, of if she should say this at all, but she had reached a point where she for once doesn't care about such things. This is something she wants, her body wants and she cannot fight against it any longer. Not now that she knows there is still this door open for them to be again.
"What would you say...if we'd just run away," Laura's voice nothing but a whisper, Carmilla closed her eyes. "What if we just pretend nothing of this happened? Just for tonight; and whatever tomorrow will be, will be, but tonight it's just you and me...two people...,"
"In love..." Carmilla's voice cracks.
"Yes," the blonde nods, "let's go upstairs and pretend," Laura says, voice hope-filled, almost pleading. Again: not the thing she cares about this moment. "It's getting pretty cold without you, and if memory serves me correctly," Laura can actually hear Carmilla chuckle at her high-jacking her own words, "that despite you being one of the un-dead, your body was always very capable of warming me up quite nicely," Laura couldn't help but sneak her tongue out and let it softly touch the rim of Carmilla's ear, sending another shudder through Carmilla's body. Under other circumstances, with other people, Carmilla would see it as weak how easy this is influencing her, but not with Laura. Laura makes her feel safe, safe enough to not let this display of a part of herself bother her.
It took a moment for Carmilla to regain her composure. She thought for a few long moments, took a deep breath and shut the laptop off, automatically deleting the entire video she just had spent over an hour fimling and trying to find words for not all that long ago. That's when Carmilla finally -fucking finally- moved and rose from the chair, looking at Laura for the first time ever since she had entered the room. For a moment both woman just keep staring at each other, as if trying to find answers in each other's eyes, and some of them are there and for now that's good enough.
"So, what do you say?" Laura prompts cocking her head to the side, giving Carmilla that kind of look she just can't say no to. And she knows it.
"I think," Carmilla cracks a smile, "I think I'd like that very much," and yes, tonight seems to be a night of déjà-vu. "Lead the way," she adds boldly.
"Gladly milady," Laura smiles, more than happy that the flirting still comes so naturally to them, which wasn't a thing that was always a case, as Laura remembers, cringing inwardly. She then takes Carmilla by the hand and leads them to the bedroom.
They are not oblivious to the fact that they're most likely have to start from zero and that this will be a hug fucking amount of work to get it going again, but an pretended escape, even if just for one night, might just be the right thing to do before attempting to untangle the mess they have created.
Both thinking: when they were capable to make this mess together, there was nothing holding them back to fix it...together.