Chapter 3
“An, you know you don’t have to come” Lexa grumbles, pushing her cereal around her bowl in disinterest.
“You know I wouldn’t miss my baby sis playing her favourite sport for the world!” Anya replies, drawing a pout from Lexa.
“Baby? Hpmfffff” a folding of the arms in defiance causes Anya to laugh.
“You’ll always be my baby sis, no matter how old you are Lex” Anya gives unruly chestnut curls unkempt from sleep a ruffle playfully, only making Lexa’s lips draw out further.
“Be careful or that bluebird in the garden might fly through the kitchen window and perch on that bottom lip in a minute” Lexa can’t help the slight smile that is raised in response.
Lexa and Anya Woods have always been incredibly close siblings. I guess that’s what becomes of being the only family you have left. Their parents both died in a fatal car crash when Anya was barely over seven years old and Lexa one. Lexa can’t remember what her mother or father looked like, the only aid she has now is one remaining picture of the four of them together. When they were orphaned they went to live with a pleasant family who already had a son called Aden, they still keep in touch with him from time to time even now. Unfortunately due to a family dispute before the sisters were born (their mother Jessica’s family hadn’t been able to accept the fact that she got married at nineteen and had a baby not long after to a boy that none of them thought was good enough for their puritan family) this meant that all ties were cut and when the sisters attempted to reach out to their grandparents, their aunt and uncle, none of them wanted to know.
Anya knows that Lexa is more than capable of looking after herself, she’s always been fiercely independent and headstrong, but it doesn’t stop her from taking up the role of over-protective big sis. Having to change schools four times didn’t seem to faze Lexa, but it definitely fazed Anya. Not only had Lexa had to deal with growing up without parents but she had also had to cope with almost constant bullying.
It’s always the same. Kids see Lexa as this confident, beautiful girl who exudes charisma until they find out her secret, that’s when they change how they act around her rather drastically. You see Lexa is intersex.
If you asked Lexa about it she would shrug her shoulders and say it’s no big deal, because it isn’t. She’s always felt reasonably confident in her own skin, when she was tiny she didn’t think she was any different to any other girl but when she did start to learn about the differences between sexes it didn’t bother her. Anya would always look on in pride as Lexa would animatedly explain to anyone who would listen that this is who she is and just because she isn’t ‘the norm’ it didn’t mean that she had to look at herself in disgust for being unique. She liked who she was and if other people didn’t, well that’s their problem.
Kids can be cruel and the bullying took different forms. The reasoning behind jumping schools so often was more to give Lexa some peace than anything else. She tried not to let their words, their fists bother her, and most of the time she would fight back but more than anything else she was tired, tired of people and their closed mindedness. She just wanted to study hard, get good grades and really start her life.
This is especially why she had no time for people like Clarke Griffin.
People who are obsessed with the material things in life, people who are obsessed with popularity stakes. Things that aren’t at all important.
She had grown up surrounded by people like this and she wasn’t about to let yet another insufferable blonde drama queen drag her into her vain attempts at gaining attention.
*****
“Mom, don’t even think about it, I’m not even starting the game, I don’t want you there embarrassing me”
“Don’t be silly sweetie, I wouldn’t embarrass you, I just want to be there to support my princess” Abbie coos as she loads three blueberry pancakes onto a plate for Clarke.
Clarke rolls her eyes, “please, don’t”
The thought of her mum, the loud and garish over dramatic Abby making a scene in front of Lexa makes Clarke’s blood run cold at the thought.
She’s doing enough of a good job making a fool of herself in front of the brunette without anyone else’s help.
Clarke can’t exactly pinpoint what it is about Lexa that affects her so much. Her annoyingly good looks obviously affect her in that way, she’s powerless to prevent that, anyone with eyes is powerless to prevent that. But that’s not what bothers Clarke. It’s the fact that she just crumbles when around her.
When she first saw the brunette she saw a great opportunity to have some fun at the new girl’s expense, but that didn’t go to plan. Lexa hadn’t entered the fray like any usual new girl. She had entered with so much confidence and poise it had shocked Clarke and she hadn’t expected to be challenged in such a way and so soon.
In fact nobody dared to challenge Clarke. Even though it wasn’t set in stone there was your usual typical high school hierarchy at Polaris and Clarke was sitting pretty on her throne at the top. Everybody bowed down to her, everybody catered to her every need and whim, she could have the pick of anybody she liked, but that was beginning to change.
It seemed that Lexa didn’t care about the hierarchy, not one bit, and it was also evident that she didn’t care much for Clarke either.
This wasn’t supposed to happen, Lexa was supposed to fall at her feet like everyone else, she wasn’t supposed to stand up to Clarke or do something to take the limelight off her. If Clarke wants something, someone, she damn well gets it and she wasn’t about to let some brunette with a body that’s a work of art stand in her way. She will regain the limelight, she will regain her confidence and she will have Lexa Woods.
*****
Friday evening came and it was time for Polaris’ next match, this time against Trikru academy.
Clarke was cold, grumpy, and wet.
Raindrops dripped off her raincoat, off her nose, off every available surface as she sat huddled under the tiny substitute’s shelter.
Despite the torrential downpour the game was going well, Polaris were 3-1 up, courtesy of two goals from Lexa, of course.
She seemed to have boundless energy, making runs backwards and forwards, intercepting the ball here, tackling with gusto there and making powerful shots at goal with her killer right foot.
As majestic as her skills were Clarke couldn’t help but allow her eyes to shamelessly roam the athletic figure whenever she jogged close enough.
She was absolutely covered in mud from top to toe, which strangely enough seemed to make her even hotter, there were even thin streaks of the stuff underneath her eyes. Impressive sized biceps and thighs rippled and pumped as she ran, Clarke even noticed a teasing glimpse of another tattoo peeking from underneath her right shirt sleeve.
Fuck, she’s gorgeous.
The warmth that floods her body, tingles her senses at the sight of the brunette is the only heat she manages to gather into her raw skin.
The shrill sound of a whistle startles Clarke from her Lexa fuelled reverie and she glances up to notice that the game has ended.
A steady frown begins to taint her features as she watches her team mates gather a laughing Lexa into their arms and carry her off the pitch with a chant of “Lexaaa, Lexaaa!”
Clarke bristles in annoyance before standing up, stretching her stiff muscles and making her way across the pitch and after the others.
*****
The ride home was less than thrilling.
“That Lexa is a good player isn’t she”
Clarke grunts in acknowledgement from under the safety of her jumper’s hood.
“You know I got talking to her sister when I went inside for a coffee, Anya her name is”
Clarke freezes, turning her head to the side to stare at her mum.
“And?” Clarke asks, a little too snappily.
“Lovely girl, she’s invited us round to hers tonight for something called a candle party, apparently you each take a candle and you can swap yours with someone else’s if you fancy theirs more. She also runs her own candle making company and is sure to have loads of stock on show, I told her how much we both love a good candle”.
“Sounds like a stupid idea” Clarke snaps. “Well you can go if you like but I’m not”. No way was she going to Anya’s house, where Lexa would more than likely be as well. She shivers at the thought.
“Honey don’t be like that, I already told Anya we both would go and Lexa being new around here and all it might be a nice opportunity to be able to bond with someone her age, that would be nice wouldn’t it? Making a new friend?”
Clarke doesn’t know whether to swear or to undo her seatbelt and jump out of the moving car in a desperate attempt to escape this madness.
Either way she WAS NOT going. No way.
*****
It’s amazing what the threat of having your tablet, cell phone, laptop and ipod taken away from you can do for persuasion.
As Clarke and Abby walk up the woods’ driveway Clarke finds an unpleasant nervous energy has resided in her stomach and she has to take a deep breath in an attempt to steady herself.
A smiley blonde woman opens the door. “Abby! And this must be Clarke! Welcome to my humble abode” the woman laughs and motions for them to make their way into the house.
Clicking the door behind her Clarke jumps when Anya suddenly shouts “Lexa! Come and take our guests’ coats please” why was she so jumpy all of a sudden? calm yourself Griffin.
A few seconds later that brunette saunters towards them from one of the side rooms. When she realises who has just entered her house she freezes, looking towards her sister accusingly as if she wants to say something before thinking better of it.
“This is Abby and this is of course Clarke who I’m sure you know already” Anya smiles.
Lexa clears her throat before reaching to take Abby’s hand in welcome. “Nice to meet you Ms Griffin”
Ms Griffin? Clarke rolls her eyes. Of course she’s also a perfect hostess. She can add that to her list of star qualities.
Taking her coat from a beaming Abby, Lexa then turns towards Clarke. Their eyes meet and Lexa’s gaze isn’t half as welcoming.
“Clarke” Lexa acknowledges, there’s a certain hardness to it and Clarke gulps.
“Lexa” Clarke almost squeaks, holding out her jacket for Lexa to take.
Abby and Anya look between the two in astonishment, as if they had both just greeted each other in Russian.
As Lexa makes her way upstairs with the garments Anya decides to break the suddenly tense atmosphere with a “right, what can I get you girls to drink? All of the other guests are here so we can get started in a minute”
Clarke doesn’t recognise most of the other guests. There’s another parent of one of the soccer team girls’ and a few siblings of people she knows from school but that’s it.
“Okay, lads and ladies this is how it’s going to work” Anya begins, commanding the attention from her guests as she stands at one end of the lounge.
“Seeing as there are ten of you you’ll each take a number from this bag. There are two sets of 1-5 numbers, if you pick out 1 for example you will be paired with the other corresponding person who picks out 1, you get to view each other’s candles and if you fancy a swap, feel free, but If you don’t well that’s where the fun bit comes in” she grins “every time you decline a swap you have to take a drink from this table here” everybody looks to where Anya is pointing where some interesting coloured liquid sits temptingly in shot glasses. “By the end of the night, in states of varying degrees you should all be going home with something different than you came here tonight with”
Clarke thinks the idea is slightly silly and as she goes to pull a face she stops herself as she notices a certain brunette gazing at her out the corner of her eye.
When she turns her attention fully to Lexa who is perched on the arm of a chair not far away her gaze has been redirected to the clock on the wall, as if she’s waiting for something.
Lexa had definitely not been staring at Clarke’s chest, nope, never.
She didn’t at all like the girl but it didn’t mean that she wasn’t allowed to admire the impressive amount of cleavage that was on display tonight.
At school was different, at school you was covered up, but now Clarke was obviously taking advantage of the freedom by wearing a rather tight fitting blue top that barely kept everything in.
She understood the appeal of Clarke, she understood why the girl had so many people after her with those mesmerising deep blue eyes and that beautifully soft golden, slightly wavy hair and that smile, which Lexa would admit she had rarely seen, as for some reason Clarke tended to have a permanent scowl fixed on her face when around Lexa but from afar she had witnessed it, and it was a wonder to behold.
It’s just a shame that Clarke has so many faults that Lexa simply cannot overlook, otherwise she might have been found tasting Clarke’s lips instead of Niylah’s at that party last week.
As Anya goes on to explain how obviously the younger members of the party will have a much lighter alcopop version as a shot instead of the strong stuff there’s a knock at the door and Lexa gets up to go and answer it.
Clarke hears muffled voices from the hallway and a moment later Lexa reappears with a giggling Monroe in toe.
Her insides clench at the sight uncomfortably and she shifts where she sits.
As there’s now a lack of space available Lexa chooses to sit on the floor where Monroe sidles up as close as she can, gripping hold of the brunette’s arm almost possessively which has Clarke positively bristling with anger.
She has no right or reason to be angry but she is, and the feeling is suffocating.
By this point the game has started, Clarke goes through the motions without having the slightest interest in participating.
She just can’t keep her eyes off the pair snuggling to her left.
Monroe will whisper in Lexa’s ear from time to time, raising a laugh from the girl and at one point Lexa squeezes Monroe’s knee and although brief it puts Clarke on edge.
And then the inevitable happens. Clarke is paired with Lexa.
They approach each other stiffly, holding their candles out for inspection.
Clarke sniffs the candle non committedly, noticing on the label it reads ‘pine cone forest’ damn it, of COURSE Lexa would choose a scent that Clarke finds absolutely irresistible, but she is not about to admit it.
At this stage of the game Abby is more than tipsy and she chooses that exact moment to waltz over to the two awkward girls.
“Claaaaaarke” she drawls, “now what have we got here?” she snatches the candle from Clarke’s grasp, “pine cone forest? Oh that’s so you Clarke, this is the one!”
Clarke scowls, “no mom, actually I find the scent disgusting” Lexa raises her eyebrows and shifts uncomfortably at her side.
“But Claaaaaarke, you’ve always said that the smell of the forest feels like home, that it reminds you of the times you and your dad-“
“MOM!” Clarke is shouting now, she has no right to talk about her dad or the forest, or the time they spent together, not here, not now, not ever.
“I don’t want Lexa’s damn candle, just leave it! Leave me alone!”
She pushes past her astonished mother and makes her way over to Anya who looks concerned. After asking the blonde where she could find their bathroom she storms upstairs, slamming the door behind her.
Slumping against the wall and sliding down it with the grace of a giraffe on ice skates she comes to rest on the floor. Fisting her hair angrily, running her fingers through her waves she breathes in and out shakily, trying to calm her racing heart.
After a while she begins to calm down but she’s far too embarrassed to make a reappearance downstairs. She just made a fool of herself around the brunette, AGAIN.
“Fuck” she breathes harshly, banging a fist on the floor in frustration.
And that’s when she hears a noise, of hushed tones? Of giggling?
Getting slowly to her feet she tiptoes over to the door and opens it a tiny fraction.
It’s Lexa and Monroe. Hand in hand. Trying to be as quiet as possible as they move down the hallway.
Then Clarke feels her stomach drop as Monroe is pushed against the wall and Lexa is on her, attacking her neck, her lips, causing stifled moans to erupt from the pinned girl’s mouth.
Clarke swallows thickly, closing her eyes and taking a large breath of air.
Could her day possibly get any worse?
But it does get worse, sooner than Clarke anticipated.
“I’ve wanted you from the second I laid eyes on you” Lexa breathes against the girl’s neck and Clarke can feel herself begin to tremble, but from what? rage?... jealousy?
Why doesn’t she want me?
Clarke wants to scream, wants to barge out of this room and just break the two girls apart, demand to hear it from Lexa’s mouth, why don’t you want me?
As the figures retreat into Lexa’s room to do god knows what Clarke feels her flight instincts take hold so she runs, she runs down the stairs, out the front door and she runs all the way home.
*****
She lies on her bed staring at the ceiling, blinking back the emotions that threaten to spill over.
She’s never felt this way before. This powerless, this frustrated. She doesn’t want to admit it but she simply can’t ignore it. Lexa makes her weak.
Clarke thought she had everything figured out but then along comes Lexa.
Lexa Woods has gate crashed her simple life and is turning it on its head. Lexa Woods is changing everything.