Goodbyes Never Felt So Heartbreaking Before

"Oh! That reminds me," came Clarke's sudden outburst.

Lexa hums a reply, waiting for what the blonde had to say.

"So, I went on a date yesterday with this girl I met and the most ridiculous thing happened!"

Lexa's fingers paused in mid-text to Anya as a cold chill ran down her spine.

The blonde was oblivious, of course.

"-and then, out of nowhere, this-"

Lexa knew better than to be hurt upon hearing Clarke dating. They weren't dating. But it did hurt. She also knew better to keep her mouth shut and not comment on it, allowing the blonde to continue the conversation as if her slip up was nothing big.

Lexa has never been the type to shut the fuck up at the right time either.

"You're seeing someone?"

The question was nothing but a whisper, the brunette doubting that the blonde even heard it. But judging by the way the silence replaced the excited chatter, hands frozen in mid animation of her story telling, the brunette chanced a glance at her friend.

Best friend, she reminded herself.

The blonde's face was devoid of color, mouth parted open in surprise, the realization dawning on her.

"Oh.. Shit.. Did I not-"

"-It's fine," Lexa said as calmly as she can but there was still a hint of bite into it, forcing her fingers to continue the text she was writing to Anya.

"Lexa, I-"

Lexa shook her head to silence the blonde's guilty words before they even escaped, knowing that if Lexa listened to them, it will just do more damage than good. After all, she had no right to feel betrayed. Clarke was never hers in the first. At least, not anymore..

"So," Lexa started while clearing her throat, putting her phone down to give her full attention to the blonde, trying to pass off a thin line as a small smile, "then what happened?"

The blonde didn't say anything, merely staring at the brunette now, studying her.

"I'm so-"

A knock on their shared apartment door stopped Clarke's word and Lexa took the opportunity to stand up, grab her keys, wallet, and coat on the way to the front door.

"I might be out late. Don't wait up," Lexa rushed out just as she opened the door to see her sister Anya looking like a bad ass in her tight jeans, favorite boots, band shirt, and leather jacket.

Lexa smiles at her sister and they briefly hug before stepping out of her apartment. She throws the blonde a look and a light shrug.

"You know how Anya gets when she wants some sisterly bonding time. Pizza and movie tomorrow, yeah? Goodbye Clarke."

Lexa was gone before Clarke can even register the brunette's words, the door closing silently behind her. This isn't the first time she's been left alone by herself. Far from it. Yet somehow, the blonde never felt more alone than she did now.

Goodbyes never felt so heartbreaking before.