The cabin
“Prove it.”
They were inside the miniscule hall of the cabin. Her back against the wall of the small, closet like space, Carol roughly reached for Therese, making her stand in front of her. Searching the crystal blue gaze, Therese saw a searing anger in Carol’s eyes, turning them into a darker shade. Feigning innocence, Therese raised her eyebrows.
“Prove what?”
Carol tightened her grip of the frail young woman, bringing her mouth close to her left ear. Her voice was hoarse.
“Prove that you only want me …”
Carol’s tangible jealousy sent a strong rush of adrenalin through Therese’s body. This was a side of her lover she did not yet know, but instantly excited her. She brought her hands up to Carol’s face, grabbed the blond hair and forced Carol’s head backwards. Looking into Carol’s eyes she smiled, a taunting smile.
“So, what do you want me to do, Mrs. Aird.”
Her eyes not leaving Therese’s, Carol moved her hands to the waistband of the younger woman’s jeans.
“Now that, Miss Belivet, is up to you to find out.”
With a groan, Therese pulled Carol’s head towards her. Her kiss was aggressive, full of want. At first Carol did not react, but soon she capitulated, giving in to the powerful yearning that had seized her the moment Therese had admitted she had kissed another woman. Never before had her need for her lover collided with this fiery anger. It was an explosive mix, that set her on fire. Yes, she would fight Therese, but devour her at the same time.
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“I kissed her …”
Carol tensed, feeling Therese hesitate even before she could see it.
“But then I realized that I only want you.”
The revelation shocked Carol to the core. Looking into Therese’s eyes, she saw remorse and a plea for … for what? She fought the urge to pull back her hand that had been enfolded by Therese’s, knowing this would upset the young woman. She shrugged, then whispered,
“What can I say …?”
“I love you, Carol.”
Therese’s voice quivered and Carol saw how tears filled her eyes.
“Two usuals for the ladies!”
Eileen’s cheery voice startled them both. Their intense conversation had made them oblivious of their surroundings. Unaware of the tension between her two customers, the beaming waitress put two well-filled plates of fish & chips on the table. Carol managed a smile to thank her.
“This looks great, Eileen.”
Eileen patted her shoulder, then noticed a new customer entering the diner.
“Enjoy.”
In silence they watched Eileen walk up to the new customer, a man in denim sporting a large cowboy hat. Carol took up her cutlery that was folded in a green napkin.
“Let’s eat.”
Therese followed Carol’s gestures. Without saying a word they instinctively agreed not to continue their emotional conversation, knowing that the diner did not offer the privacy and safety to master this new development in their relationship. They ate in silence. Unable to digest much, Therese somehow managed to finish half of her plate before excusing herself to go to the bathroom, giving Carol time to settle the bill and say goodbye to Eileen.
Carol waited for her at the car, her face unreadable, her eyes hidden behind her sunglasses.
“Ready?”
Therese nodded, then opened the door of her side of the Volvo.
It took them two more hours to reach the small cabin that Carol had inherited from her parents. Set back in the woods, it could only be reached by a winding dirt road that had made the old car creak. Not wanting the continuing silence between them become oppressive, Carol had talked about her parents and the worriless holidays she had spent with them near Salina. Grateful, Therese had listened, sometimes putting in a question or two. Slowly, the tension between them had subsided, although they both remained acutely aware of the turmoil in their head.
At last the dense wood made way for a clearing. The cabin was old, but well looked after. Bathing in the golden late afternoon sun, it leisurely beckoned the two now reluctant women. Carol switched off the car, then sat motionless for a few moments before opening her door. Without looking at Therese, she waved her hand to the cottage.
“Let me show you around.”
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Therese woke up to the sound of rain ticking on the wooden roof of the cabin. While her eyes adjusted to the darkness around her, she became aware of the arm that was firmly twisted around her waist. Turning carefully, she came face to face with Carol. She was still asleep. Therese moved her hand to stroke the fine lines around Carol’s eyes. For the first time she noticed some grey hairs hiding in the blond curls. She smiled: they only added to Carol’s beauty. She turned again to lie on her back, revelling in the tenderness that filled her, a tenderness so contrary to the desperate, almost aggressive need that had consumed her earlier.
Feeling somewhat uncomfortable, she acknowledged that she had been rough with Carol, turned on by her lover’s equally challenging reaction to her own taunting question what is was that Carol wanted from her. Their wild kiss in the hall had left them both breathless and Carol had pushed an uncooperative Therese to the small living room, where, both unwilling to capitulate, they somehow ended up wrestling for the upper hand on the rug in front of the stone fireplace. Eventually, surprising herself, Therese had managed to roll Carol over on to her stomach. Straddling her legs, she had pressed her upper body against Carol’s back, her left hand covering Carol’s mouth. With her right hand she reached under Carol’s body, finding the buttons that closed her jeans. Panting, she managed to unbutton them, sliding her hand into Carol’s briefs. Suddenly she hesitated.
“My God, Carol …”
Moaning, Carol pressed her back into Therese’s body lying on top of her, while Therese’s fingers slowly entered her, savouring the wetness that enveloped them. They moved in unison, until Carol, her teeth digging into Therese’s hand, reached her climax. Afterwards, Therese had tenderly turned Carol around, wrapping her arms around her, kissing her face, still covered with sweat and tears. They had lain like that until it got too cold and they had fled to the comfort of the big, warm duvet on the bed in the master bedroom. Still holding each other’s now naked bodies, they soon fell asleep.
Therese shifted, careful not to wake Carol. What had happened between them this afternoon astounded her. She had been assertive before with Carol, the day they had finally been together again after their four week separation. But today was different. They had literally fought for dominance and she had forced herself on Carol, who had let her …
With a shock Therese realized what Carol had done. She had blindly given her her trust. When she was at her most vulnerable, lying underneath her, Carol had trusted Therese with her body, certain that she would not harm her. And she had been right. Therese closed her eyes, only now fully understanding Carol’s offering. And then she knew that there was only one possible answer to Carol’s silent question: for the first time in her life she would give her trust to somebody… unconditionally.