Sorry
Meredith didn’t plan on hiding from Addison but that’s exactly what she was doing. She knew that the woman was coming. The chief said there was a tough case so they’d called in Dr Montgomery. She knew that she’d be seeing her. She wasn’t expecting to be hiding out in a supply closet. Meredith practically falls over when she hears the door open, when she realises it’s Cristina she immediately grabs the front of the woman's lab coat and drags her to the back of the supply closet and instantly starts to rant. Cristina tries to protest, insisting she has a patient but Meredith isn’t stopping so she listens. Meredith finally tells Cristina about her 8 month relationship with Addison Montgomery. About how they were in love and how Addison broke her heart by packing up and leaving for a new life in LA without so much as a goodbye. Cristina is stunned to silence for a moment, she had absolutely no idea. ‘Are you still in love with her?’ She asks. Meredith looks at her she sees that Cristina isn’t mocking her for once so she gives her a sincere nod. ‘Then don’t let her leave without talking to her. But make sure she knows she was a total ass.’ Cristina smiles sheepishly and turns to get the supplies she needs before leaving.
Meredith almost turned to leave, she could pretend she was never there in the first place. But instead she knocks on the door and waits. ‘It’s open.’ The woman on the other side of the door calls out. Meredith takes a deep breath before stepping into the room and closing the door. Addison doesn’t look up right away, she finishes typing something on her laptop before turning her attention to Meredith. She freezes when she sees her. ‘ Meredith.’ Addison breathes. Addison stands and moves around the desk to stand in front of Meredith. Meredith reaches up and kisses Addison. She didn’t plan this either but she wanted to kiss her and didn’t feel like waiting. Addison moans into Meredith’s mouth as her arms come up and around her back, whilst Meredith’s hands make their way into Addison’s hair. When they pull away from the kiss, their foreheads are pressed together. ‘I’m sorry.’ Addison sighs. Meredith pulls back instantly, moving out of Addison’s arms. Addison can tell by the look on Meredith’s face that she’s upset by what she said. ‘Sorry for what?’ Meredith yells. ‘For our relationship? For running off to LA? Without a goodbye? Or for breaking my heart? Really Addison what are you sorry for?’ Meredith is crying, she knows she is because she always cries when she’s angry. The room is silent for a few moments. Addison walks towards Meredith and tries to put her hand on her arm. Meredith shoots her a look that tells her not to. Addison takes a deep breath. ‘I’m sorry for hurting you..but I’m not sorry for leaving. I had to get away from everything that was Seattle. Everything here was just too much…I knew if I’d have talked to you about it I’d have felt too guilty and I wouldn’t be able to leave but I couldn’t stay either. I am so sorry that I hurt you. You were the only good thing about this place in the end, baby. I love you.’ Addison finishes with a sigh. Meredith doesn’t say anything for a few minutes, she just thinks about what Addison has said. Meredith walks towards the door and turns. ‘I get it. I know why you did it but it still hurts. I love you too, Addie. I just don’t know what to do.’ Meredith only makes it halfway down the hallway before she feels Addison’s hand on her arm. She turns to find Addison crying. Meredith pulls her into her arms, unable to fight the urge to comfort her. She rubs her back gently. ‘Shh, it’s okay Addie, I’m here. I’m here, babe.’ After a few moments of soothing words Addison moves her head so that she can see Meredith. ‘I walked away…Meredith..I walked away and I shouldn’t have…I know that. So I’m asking you not to walk away now. Please, can we figure something out? It’s been hell not being with you…I know that we live in different states but we can make it work, right? Please, Meredith. I’m begging you baby, let’s try.’ Addison is crying again and Meredith lifts her hands to her cheeks to rub the tears away. Meredith sighs. ‘We can’t.’ She whispers. She’s crying now too. ‘You know we can’t. We couldn’t deal with long distance Addie. We can’t live in the same state because you have your work in LA and I have to finish residency. I love you Addie but we can’t be together. I’m sorry but you know it’d never work for us.’ Meredith looks at Addison while she waits for a response. Addison nods. She knows Meredith is right. She straightens herself up and wipes the tears from her face. ‘Goodbye, Dr Grey.’ She holds her hand out for Meredith to shake. Most people would find this cold and heartless but Meredith knows it’s anything but. Addison is a person who feels too much, so this seemingly cold gesture is Addison’s way of making this hurt less. If only it were that easy. Meredith sighs. ‘Goodbye, Dr Montgomery.’ She shakes Addison’s hand before walking away.