Wedding
Lost and Insecure!
"The florist has just cancelled on me" Clarke huffs throwing her phone on the couch beside her while cradling her head in her hands. Falling in love with Lexa woods was the best most easiest thing she had ever done, how could it not be? She thought marrying her would be just as easy, booking the venue, dozens upon dozens of flowers, a beautiful meal and a night no one would forget. She pictured it over and over again, every last detail from the cake, to Lexa's smile that she would wear all night. Honestly that smile had kept her going for the last month, because everything that could possibly go wrong, was. "Maybe we should just postpone i clearly can't do this on my own" Clarke says sadly before looking up to her dad.
"Don't even think about it" Jake warns softly looking at his daughter knowingly. "I've just brought a new suit for this" he says jokingly while kneeling down by his daughter with a sympathetic smile. "That and I've been waiting to give you away to Lexa for Years" he says proudly in such a way that has Clarke sitting there in silent with her chest filling with pride and her eyes beginning to water. "You don't need flowers for a wedding to be perfect" Jake breathes placing his hand on the blondes knee. "Lexa won't even notice when you're standing in front of her"
"I know" Clarke says softly. "But it's not just that it's everything, its not only going to have no flowers but we're all going to be drowned by rain and to top it off i still haven't found my perfect wedding dress" Clarke breathes exhausted. It was all so easy in her head.
"Honey" Jake hums softly wrapping his arms around her back. "Do you remember when you were five years old and i walked in on you marring Mr Cox?"
"Dad" Clarke whines shaking her head, this isn't the same.
"No listen" he laughs. "You had created your own wedding in your tree house. You had some awful princess dress on some plastic rings and necklaces" he grins remembering it like it was yesterday. "You even stole some of your mums make up and put it on where you thought it was suppose to go. You looked like a beautiful clown" He teases while Clarke nudges him barely remembering the story at all. "The point is back then, you was marrying a teddy and you used everything you had to do that, you didn't need flowers, hell you didn't even put make up on properly, but you thought you looked beautiful anyway, and as far as you was concerned it was the best day ever" He breathes. "You even had me walk you the two steps to your teddy" he laughs. "Nothing stopped you then" Jake says finally turning to face his daughter. "You're here Clarke" he says proudly. "You're marrying the woman you love, and the woman who worships the ground you walk on, and hangs on your every word" He says. "Don't let little things stop you walking down that aisle, because in the end the only thing that matters is the words 'I do'"
"Thank you" Clarke says after a moment while wrapping her arms around her dads neck.
"No, thank you" he says warmly with a grin in place. "Now i don't have to return my suit" he teases jumping up as Clarke goes to smack him. "I'm kidding, I'm proud of you, i know it's been hard with her being away for so long, and with you working planning the wedding and everything else"
"I just want to spoil her" Clarke confesses thinking about all her wedding plans that hadn't failed.
"You have done" He says making you smile. "Now lets find you a dress!"
Clarke's phone starts ringing just as she's about to object because right now she can't think of anything worse than shopping for wedding dresses, its possibly the most stressful thing she's ever done. It's weird because before she was planning her own wedding, she had saw hundred's of dresses hanging in windows that she thought were absolutely beautiful but somehow while she was getting engaged and beginning to plan, all the beautiful ones had vanished.
"Saved by the bell" Jake laughs as Clarke looks at her phone to see who it is. "Judging by that face it's Lexa" Jake teases. "Suddenly i need some air, it's hot in here isn't it?" he frowns standing up and heading for the back door while Clarke shakes her head and laughs at him, thankful none the less.
"Hey" Is the first thing Clarke says as she answers.
"Hi" Lexa says just as soft. Clarke's smiling already and they haven't even said anything, even when the phone line falls quiet while both just being content to be talking to one another. "I miss you" Lexa finally breathes setting a thousand butterflies of.
"I miss you more" Clarke breathes eyes flickering to there wedding plans splayed out across the table. "These two days are going the slowest" Clarke admits.
It had been five weeks since they had last seen once another, Lexa was finishing of her tour on the other side of the world, while Clarke had been left to continue planning the wedding and making sure everything would go smoothly, it wasn't but hey she tried. The best part was, when Lexa returned home, she's decided to take time of for their wedding and honeymoon which was the main reason Clarke agreed to finishing everything off before the wedding, although going six weeks without Lexa around had Clarke on the verge of telling her to come back home almost every night, but she didn't because she knew Lexa would without hesitation.
"I know" Lexa breathes sounding just as exhausted as the brunette. "Are you nervous?" Lexa finally questions.
"Petrified" Clarke breathes after a beat knowing Lexa's talking about getting married in less than ten days. "But i can't wait to call you mine"
"I'm already yours" Lexa says and Clarke can hear the harsh swallow Lexa does through the phone.
"I know, but you no what i mean" Clarke hums slouching back on the couch for the first time in twenty four hours feeling completely content. "Lex"
"Yeah?"
"I love you, you know that right?" Clarke questioned her eyes falling on a photo from years ago from Christmas at her parents house. Lexa had been snuggled in to Clarke before Jake encouraged Lexa to sing infront of all of them for the first time. They looked so young and different, yet still the same in its own way.
"i know" Lexa says and Clarke knows she's smiling and its enough. The stress, the appointments, everything that's going wrong, its all worth it because Lexa loves her and she loves Lexa. "What's wrong?" Lexa questions after a beat.
She always knows.
"I just really needed to hear your voice" Clarke breathes. "Stay on the phone a little while?"
"I'm right here"
---
"Little bit more" Anya pants. "That's it. Fuck that's heavy!" she groans dropping the cupboard to the floor with a whine and dramatic rub to her back which automatically has Lexa laughing.
"That was the last one" Lexa says much to Anya's relief. "Do you think she will like it?" Lexa questions looking around the new place her and Clarke will soon call home.
"Like it? No. Love it? Definitely" Anya says softly walking in to the middle of the room. "Not many people would do this, although she might kill you if she knew you have been home for a week" Anya points sitting on the new king size bed all set up and ready.
"I know" Lexa says nipping at her bottom lip nervously. "How is she doing really?"
"Stressed" Anya says simply. "But what do you expect? She's planning the best day of your life's while constantly being hit with headlines in the media"
"They're all rubbish"
"I know that, and so does she but still the media isn't something she's ever gotten use to"
"I know" Lexa says sadly remembering the constant headlines popping up on her phone about struggles in there relationship because Clarke's engagement ring was no where to be seen on countless occasions when she's left the hospital. Not to mention the made up stories about Lexa supposedly moving on with a brunette she was caught having lunch with, apparently the media have nothing better to do than to create theories and fake 'close resources.' They don't take in to consideration that Clarke's a surgeon and isn't aloud to wear jewellery, they don't take in to consideration that Clarke prefers to keep her diamond ring in a safe place instead of a small locker at work, they don't take in to consideration that Lexa actually has friends who aren't her girlfriend. "I spoke to her yesterday, has something else happened?"
"The florist has cancelled, something about wrong orders and short staffed. A load of bullshit excuses really" Anya waves of suddenly looking at Lexa in amusement. "Lexa"
"Hmm"
"You look like you're about to have an aneurysm with how hard you're thinking right now. Just go for god sake"
"Really?"
"Bolt kid. I'll make sure all the finishing touches are done here, now go and see your depressing hormonal wifey"
"She's not my wife yet" Lexa says turning around with a smile on her face. "Yet" she repeats with a huge grin while turning around and almost sprinting down the stairs.
"Such a nerd!" Anya shouts shaking her head.
-----
Lexa loved the feeling in the pit of her stomach when ever it had been longer than a day since she saw Clarke, it was like she became a nervous wreck from feeling so much excitement and for the life of her could not stop smiling. It was dorky and lame, but she really couldn't careless as she fiddled with the end of her jumper and took her first steps back into their home. The little things had her smiling more, the scent of their home, Clarke's shoes splayed by the door while there was a perfectly good shoe rack right beside them, the smell of Clarke's cooking. The urge to shout out she was home was killing her, but honestly she wanted to see Clarke's reaction to much to ruin it, so she padded through the house as quietly as possible until she was leaning against the door frame to the living room with a smile that ached.
"She's back tomorrow" Clarke says down the phone while Lexa stares at the back of her head. "Yeah, I'm picking her up around one. No you can't. Because i want to have her to myself for at least two minutes before everyone jumps on her"
Lexa padded forward as quietly as possible until she was bending down to her level right behind her while biting her bottom lip to stop her from shouting from the roof tops that she's home.
"Yeah" Clarke grins her fingers twirling around the loose thread on the cushion. "Mum" Clarke says slowly almost disbelieving. "I'm getting married in nine days" Clarke beams and Lexa can't help but smile too.
"Lexa Griffin does sound good" Lexa says quietly trying her best not to startle the blonde.
Clarke jumps anyway spinning her head around as quickly as possible till she's staring in to green eyes and standing up in shock, phone still clutched to her ear while her mouth drops open.
"Hey you" Lexa finally says her jaw about ready to drop of from aching so much.
"Is that Lexa?" Is all that can be heard through the phone. Clarke doesn't say a word her eyes are wide, her mouths still open and she's still not speaking. Lexa's broke her. "Clark-" Clarke suddenly hits the cancel call button her phone dropping from her hand to the couch as a smile is already growing, its impossible to stop it really.
"Lexa!" Clarke breathes already leaping over the couch and in to Lexa's arms causing the brunette to laugh while stumbling back. "When did you get here? How are you here? You're early. Are you really here?"
Clarke's ramble has Lexa giggling in to her neck placing a small kiss before pulling back to look in to blue eyes. "I finished up early, I wanted to surprise you" Lexa lies before her lips already tumble in to Clarke's soft ones. It's funny how she's felt them a thousand times over but each time it feels like the first.
"Well it worked! I'm officially surprised!" Clarke beams her eyes roaming Lexa's face in disbelief as she clings to her.
"Hey" Lexa whispers again her hand cupping Clarke's face. "You have no idea how much I never want to do that again" Lexa confesses bringing Clarke's lips to her own. God it's been way to long since they kissed, blowing kisses through the camera, or the sound of a 'mwah' down the phone line was never enough, but now having Clarke in her arms, she doesn't plan on letting go.
When Lexa pushes Clarke's hair away from her face, Clarke's already stuck staring at her lips, licking them in anticipation before curling her fingers around Lexa's neck and closing the remaining distance between them.
Six weeks is way to long.
They share a quiet moment that doesn't need words as they kiss a little slower and hold each other a little closer. Seconds quickly turn in to minutes and the furthest they have managed to move away from one another is by resting their foreheads together with lips tucked between teeth and eyes that can't seem to focus on one specific spot.
"I would have picked you up" Clarke whispers finally breaking the trance they had been lost in.
"I know" Lexa breathes catching Clarke's lips in a lingering kiss. "I just wanted to surprise you here. So, tell me what have I missed?" Lexa beams while pecking Clarke's lips once more. She already knows this is what she's missed the most.
"Hm. Let's see, My parents have taken it upon themselves to ring me every day because they think I am incapable without you, I think they are slightly concerned that I might top myself" Clarke smirks while rolling her eyes.
"You are a little incapable without me though" Lexa laughs squeezing Clarke even tighter.
"Pft. Like I'm going to tell them that. They would be moving in by the end of the week" Clarke scoffs.
"They've been calling me too" Lexa laughs. Abby or Jake had rung at least once a day, but instead of finding it annoying, it had warmed her even more because this was the family she never expected to get, so she answered the same questions every day with a smile that spoke the happiness she felt since meeting the Griffins. "What about you?" Lexa questions more softly.
"I'm fine" Clarke lies. "I've missed you, but I've been ok"
"Clarke" Lexa soothes a soft understanding smile on her lips that lets Clarke know everything she needs.
"I hate and love that you can do that" Clarke sighs letting her weight sag against Lexa. "You was right, we should have hired a wedding planner because everything has gone wrong. We're getting married in nine days and the florist cancelled, it's forecast to rain on our wedding day, which by the way is exactly what we don't need unless we want our photos to mimic a drowned rat. Not to mention I don't even have a dress" Clarke's eyes automatically draw down because as much as she's been holding it in, she's didn't realize how much she wanted and needed to speak to Lexa about it.
"why didn't you tell me?" Lexa frowns bringing Clarke to look at her again.
"Because you were on the other side of the world, I didn't want to cause any more stress than needed" Clarke breathes biting at her bottom lip. "I Just wanted everything to be perfect and I thought I could do it but- I just made a big mess of things. I'm so sorry" Clarke shook her head suddenly feeling stupid for thinking she could handle her workload and a wedding on her own. Without really knowing it Clarke started getting upset.
"Clarke" Lexa breathes a sad smile pulling at her lips as her hands rest on Clarke's cheeks. "I don't care where we get married, I don't care what we wear or even who shows up" Lexa confesses because none of any of that has ever crossed her mind, the only thought that has crossed her mind in the last two months is how Clarke will be standing in front of her accepting her as her wife for the rest of her life, everything else was irrelevant. "I just want to marry you" Lexa smiles wiping at a single tear falling down Clarke's cheek. "I just wanted you to have everything you had dreamt about"
"I hate that you can do that too!" Clarke smiles shaking her head as her sad tears quickly become happy tears while the panic she felt disappears.
"I didn't do anything" Lexa hums bringing her forehead to rest against Clarke's once more.
"You did everything" Clarke confesses wrapping her arms around Lexa's neck to bring their lips together. "I do believe you have a lot of lost time to make up for" Clarke smirks closing every inch of space left between them while already pushing Lexa down on the couch.
"Clarke" Lexa objects unconvincingly. "What if someone walks in?"
"They won't" Clarke says with certainty.
Apparently that's all the convincing that was needed.
---
"What are you smiling about?" Costia questions stepping beside Lexa with her own glass of wine.
"Nothing" Lexa shrugs her gaze unmoving and her smile doesn't falter because this, this is what happiness looks like, she's sure of it. Clarke and Lexa hadn't even had half an hour together alone before everyone came crashing in through the front door with one questions after another. Clarke suspected her mum was to blame because she was the only one to hear Lexa's voice through the phone, while Lexa silently blamed Raven because of course Anya could never keep a secret from her girlfriend and Raven was the biggest blabba mouth of blabba mouths.
"Heard you were caught boning your fiancée on the couch" Costia teases.
"We were not boning" Lexa defends as a flush covers her cheeks and runs down her neck. "and please don't call it that" Lexa cringes making Costia roll her eyes and laugh a little louder before bringing her drink to her lips.
They had only got as far as removing one another tops.
"Making love then" Costia smirks just before taking a sip to calm her growing smile.
Clarke's laugh echoing through the kitchen from the garden has Lexa smiling and forgetting any conversation she's currently in while her gaze remains fixed on the people she calls family.
"What are you thinking?" Costia questions.
"How did i come to get here?" Lexa frowns with a tinted smile to her lips as she watches Jake shove Clarke in to a deck chair while Anya scoffs wine out through her nose. Feeling this way wasn't exactly unfamiliar to Lexa, especially when she would have little moment where she could watch from afar. Sometimes even after years of having them all around reassuring her that they loved her, that they cared, sometimes it still felt to overwhelming. How one minute she had no one, then suddenly all these beautiful people refused to ever leave her.
"Well for starters, you fell in love" Costia breathes her gaze drifting to the family teasing one another.
"Yeah" Lexa agrees her eyes landing on the one person she was sure she couldn't live without.
"To think i had a shot with you" Costia laughs going back to when she caught Lexa kissing Clarke in her bedroom. "I'm glad i didn't wait for you" She laughs causing Lexa to finally pull her gaze from the blonde to her best friend.
"Cos, i need a favour" Lexa breathes turning serious.
"Anything?"
---
"Lex- where are we going" Clarke whines shoving her sunglasses over her face to block out all possible sunlight.
"Trust me"
"I feel like my trust only stretches to far" Clarke huffs leaning her head against the door to fall asleep. "Drive carefully" she orders after a moment with constant bumping her head against the window.
"You can't fall back to sleep" Lexa laughs her hand coming to rest on Clarke's thigh. "Please"
"What's going on?" Clarke asks softly lifting her sunglasses up to look at Lexa properly.
"You will know in like ten minutes" Lexa sighs. "Don't make me ruin it" Lexa pleads knowing she's absolutely terrible at keeping secrets and if Clarke asks her like that again, Lexa might just tell her because she hates Clarke looking concerned.
"Ok" Clarke agrees. "I trust you" she admits reaching for Lexa's hand to give a reassuring squeeze. "You're to cute, you know that"
This is one of the things Lexa loved the most about their relationship, Clarke would always know when something was wrong, and when not to prod any more. Lexa wasn't entirely sure how she knew the difference without knowing what was going on but somehow she was never wrong when to stop and when to press for more.
"Why does it look like You're taking me to a private jet?" Clarke frowns as Lexa's car drives beside a long runway to a waiting plane. Lexa chooses to smile in silence instead of answering the question, even when Clarke leans forward in her chair with a furrow to her brow in confusion. "Lexa" Clarke says cautiously turning to face her girlfriend before turning to face the plane again. "What's happening?" Lexa brings the car to a stop before finally trusting herself to look at her confused girlfriend.
"Come on" Lexa breathes a wide smile covering her face as she exits the car, while Clarke follows a few seconds after.
Clarke doesn't walk around the vehicle to join Lexa, which only amused Lexa that little bit more as she approached Clarke instead with her lip between her teeth.
"Hey" Lexa says softly in hope to bring Clarke back down to earth instead of where ever her minds going.
"What is this?" Clarke questions after a moment.
"Well, i have this fiancée" Lexa teases. "Who doesn't have a wedding dress yet" Green eyes connect with blue in a instant and in that very moment Clarke's heart starts pounding against her ribs as her eyes flicker to the plane in confusion. "This Jet has been booked to fly you to Paris" Lexa finally breathes as her hand grips Clarke's as her lips part.
"Lex-" Clarke says slowly in utter shock only to be quickly interrupted.
"I know you're about to come up with millions of reasons why you can't just fly to France" Lexa smirks. "I spoke to your mum, and your shifts are covered at work, and yes we can afford this, and yes i do realize how much this cost" Lexa laughs when she see's Clarke rolling her eyes having known every thought running through the blondes head. "but even if i didn't think of any of the consequences to you flying off, it wouldn't have stopped me." Lexa confesses. "Now get on that plane and go and find your dream dress that i know you'll look beautiful in"
"Lexa" Clarke says even more stunned than before. "I- What- what about my maid of honour. My mum will kill me if she's not there for the dress fittings"
"I guess it's a good job i thought about that too then huh?" Lexa smirks looking back up to the plane.
And just like that one face appears after another and then another, until Clarke can see Raven, Octavia, Anya and her mum looking through the windows.
"You've got to be kidding me" Clarke breathes out disbelievingly. She's not even aware tears are falling she's that overwhelmed.
"It's time for me to take some of the pressure off you" Lexa hums falling in love with Clarke awestruck look all over again. "Now get on that plane, and don't come back until you've got that dress you've been dreaming about" Lexa orders bringing their lips together in a searing kiss that take's Clarke's breath away.
"I can't believe you" Clarke breathes kissing Lexa's lips again for the millionth time. "I love you" Clarke confesses her eyes flickering between the Jet and Lexa again making Lexa laugh all over again, its a beauty in itself seeing Clarke this surprised. Mainly because she usually figures everything out.
"I love you too" Lexa laughs. "Now go!" she orders pushing her along.
Clarke kisses her one more time just because she can, and simply because she can't let go but with another roll of the eyes and shake of Lexa's head Clarke's running of up the stairs and Lexa can't help but laugh as she hears all the girls scream in excitement.
"I'm jealous im not going" Costia admits walking to stand beside Lexa.
"Thank you so much for sorting everything out for me so quickly"
"Hey, trust me, I hardly did anything, apparently your name is all that's needed" Costia laughs. "Now come on, I believe we have a flower order to arrange"
--
"I've never been on a private jet before!" Raven all most screams.
"Me neither" Clarke admits. She had travelled many places with Lexa but all them were just in first Class not a private one. Yet as Clarke's eyes skipped from one place to another admiring the spacious seats that faced one another, a flat screen TV hanging for everyone to see and Champagne in ice on every table, Clarke mouth falls open in disbelieve. "This has to be expensive" Clarke finally says but her smile hides any sign of caring.
"Please" Raven scoffs. "You're girlfriend is like a fricking millionaire!"
When all the girls laugh including her mum, Clarke can't help from shaking her head in disbelieve as they begin taking off. It wasn't like she didn't know how much money they had in their accounts, it's just they never choose to live the high life way, so this experience was very overwhelming.
She didn't know it was possible, but somehow Clarke fell in love with Lexa a little bit more as the wheels lifted from the ground.
Wedding dress, here we come!
---
"That was easier than expected" Costia frowns while bending down to smell a flower as Lexa smirks at her best friend while cradling her own flower.
"She's a friend"
"Defy friend" Costia teases before looking towards the door the florist had disappeared behind. "I'm assuming you don't have a granny fetish so im slightly hurt I've never heard of this 'Friend' of yours. Should i be worried about my position as maid of honour? oh no, don't tell me i have to tell Clarke you're cheating on her with a old lady, thats just cruel!"
"You spend way to much time with Anya and Raven" Lexa chooses to say instead of answering the question.
"What can i say?" Costia pouts. "You abandoned us all for a month, desperate times and all that" Costia teases before jumping up to sit on the counter.
"I buy Clarke's flowers from here" Lexa shrugs looking around the place fondly. She remembers the first time she came in, it seemed like a life time ago. They were both in college in different towns and the distance wasn't getting any easier, so one evening when Clarke was stressing over her work load, Lexa hadn't hesitated in travelling to see her. It was a rainy day like most days, but as Lexa travelled through the darkened empty town that evening, it was then she noticed the florist on the corner of the street still lit from the inside. Before she knew it she parked up and was fighting through the rain till she reached the shop with a completely different look from when she left the car. Her hair quickly frizzed, her glasses streaked with raindrops, even her clothes felt soaked through, but that's not what she remembered most about this little shop. It was the little old lady that greeted her with a warm worried smile, like you were a granddaughter running in to your grandma's house. Lexa back then had no idea about flowers, so when she was eventually asked what she was looking for Lexa stuttered and returned to her nervous habit and fiddled with the end of her sleeves, eyes looking suddenly worried for an answer. She knew Monica noticed her sudden discomfort and instead of allowing Lexa to sit in it, Monica moved around the shop happily while explaining what flowers she enjoyed the most. Lexa's nerves disappeared before she could even noticed it herself and before she knew it she was telling Monica that she knew nothing about flowers but loved lilies the most anyway. Monica had laughed carefully before grabbing a bunch and taking them over to the counter telling Lexa that. 'They are a beautiful choice' After Monica's final offer of a hot beverage while wrapping the flowers beautifully, Lexa was heading out the door with a genuine smile on her lips. She had no doubt she would be back, and sure enough she returned once a week and picked up the same flowers each time, and every time Lexa accepted Monica's hot beverage. That was three years ago. "I've knew her for years" Lexa admits her smile growing as she remembers all the times they have both sat down talking about Clarke and Monica's husband.
"Here you go" Monica says announcing her return as she places to hot cups of coffee on the counter before putting her glasses back on. "Does this mean i finally get to meet Clarke?" She says excitedly as she writes the date time and address to where the flowers need to be.
"I guess it does" Lexa grins back not sure if she's more excited than Monica.
"It will be nice to put a face to her name" Monica teases.
"I've shown you pictures"
"a picture is nothing" Monica waves of like a typical grandma would. She already imagines Monica squeezing Clarke's cheek's muttering 'look at you' in awe. "Do you know what flowers you would like?" Monica questions. "What kind of designs"
"I'm not entirely sure what you can do or not-"
"Anything for you" She says seriously. "Have at it love"
"Well" Lexa says a little nervously as she pulls Clarke's sketch book out. She had drew almost everything she envisioned including the flowers, which was well a life saver because Lexa still knew nothing about flowers other than they look lovely and lilies were still her ultimate favourite. "Clarke drew these" Lexa explains as she flips the book open to reveal rose bouquet's, with pink, white and purple roses. They were barely there in colour but Lexa already knew it would be enough to compliment any wedding dress. Lexa watches Monica study the drawing before seeing a soft smile grace her lips.
"They are beautiful. She's quite the drawer" Monica compliments her eyes holding a new spark as she looks up to Lexa. "They should be no trouble" she breathes. "Would you like the flowers around the room to be similar?"
"If you wouldn't mind but can i make a request of my own"
"Lilies?" Monica says knowingly.
"Please. I would like a bunch of them either side as we walk down the aisle"
"I couldn't think of anything more fitting" Monica says proudly. For a moment the two just look at one another like they no longer need words to communicate, and Lexa supposes they don't.
"This coffee is amazing" Costia finally hums in delight causing both women to laugh.
"This is Costia my maid of honour"
"Ah, I've heard alot about you"
"All good i hope!"
"In between" Monica teases causing Costia's mouth to drop open while frowning at her best friend.
----
"Are you nervous?" Raven questions doting around Clarke to make sure her make-up stays immaculate.
"Petrified" Clarke confesses looking out the window to see all the people sitting and waiting for Lexa and Clarke. "Why are there so many people here" Clarke says even more nervously. "Who is that?" Clarke frowns pointing out the window. "Oh my god im getting married in front of a bunch of people i don't even know"
"Clarke, you're literally going to hyperventilate if you don't breathe"
"Raven im getting Married" Clarke says in disbelief. "I'm marrying Lexa"
"Sure as hell hope so or your guest are going to get a shock!"
"Not helping. Where's Anya?"
"I'm here. I'm here." Anya declares rushing in the room to hand over her bouquet of flowers. "I was just checking with Lexa"
"How is she? is she ok? How does she look? Is she nervous?"
"She's fine. She looks beautiful. It's Lexa when isn't she nervous?" Anya says quickly making sure Clarke is ready. "But i think it's time you find out how beautiful she looks yourself, what do you say?"
"It's time?" Clarke says heart pounding against her ribs more aggressively than ever. She takes a deep nervous breath and Anya nods while a smile shapes her lips. "God. We're actually getting married" Clarke says one last final time.
"You're actually getting married" Anya says proudly.
Tears started to form at the confirmation and everything suddenly felt real, today she was marring her best friend, her lover and her everything.
"No! No! No tears Clarke Abigail Griffin!"
"Where's Jake?" Anya questions suddenly realizing they can't really start without him.
---
"If you walk on that spot any more, im sure you will dig a hole to hell" Costia teases following her every movement while holding the back of her dress to make sure it doesn't get dirty before it even begins.
"Sorry" Lexa says her fingers searching something to play with but finding nothing but the dress. Instead she starts chewing at her lip not wanting to crease her dress. "I just want to start" Lexa says full of nerves. Kissing Clarke for the first time was not half as scary as this, nor there first time admitting they loved one another. "What if she changes her mind?" Lexa says suddenly fear kicking in.
"Why on earth would she change her mind?"
"I don't know" Lexa mutters. "i need to speak to her" she says quicker. "What if-"
"Lexa!" Costia says calmly dropping the back of the dress completely to face her best friend. "Calm down" she orders. "Clarke loves you, and in approximately ten minutes you will officially be Mrs Griffin. Clarke's wife for the rest of your lives"
A gentle knock on the door pulls them away from Lexa's mini panic.
"There ready for you" Finn says poking his head through. "You look beautiful Lexa" Finn breathes shaking his head as his eyes rake in the dress.
"Thank you" Lexa breathes closing her eyes to clam her nerves, missing the very moment Jake slips past Finn and in to the room.
"Jake" Lexa says nervously the moment her eyes flicker open. "Is Clarke ok?" She couldn't help how she instantly thought the worst as Jake came in, she couldn't help but panic that maybe Clarke did infact change her mind and Jake was here to inform her, why else would Jake be here just as he is suppose to be walking his daughter down the aisle?
"She's fine" she smiles softly his hands already reaching out to take Lexa's. "Don't you look beautiful" She breathes his eyes taking in the dress and everything else that is Lexa. "I just wanted to see you before you made a honest woman of my daughter" he beams. It was difficult not to notice his smile radiating with every new word he spoke, it was even more difficult not to notice how very proud he was, Lexa suddenly wanted to cry before anything had even began.
She tried to stop it, she really did but there was something in the way he was looking her that spoke so many words, and the way his eyes begin to glisten them self, Lexa was utterly powerless as her vision too matches his.
"Your mom would be so proud of you right now" He finally says his voice cracked but still strong as he sniffles his suddenly runny nose.
"Jake-" Lexa starts but her voice is broke and weak but god she's smiling, she's smiling so wide.
"I know, i know" He says rolling his eyes at himself, "No tears, i wouldn't want to ruin your make up, but i just wanted to see you one last time before you walk down the aisle, because i'm so proud of you, im proud of what you have become, proud of who you are and im so proud as a dad" he breathes leaning forward to place a soft kiss on her forehead. "Don't be nervous" he says finally. "She couldn't survive without you" he grins.
And god she's crying and sniffling trying desperately not to let her mascara run.
She loves him more than ever and hates him to at this very moment.
"Thank you" She finally breathes lamely wiping just beneath her lashes.
"No, Thank you" he beams before turning and leaving the room.
The room falls silent briefly as Lexa remains staring at the door where her soon to be father in law exits. When she hears another sniffle in the room she turns to face Costia who also has a face full of tears while shooting daggers at the door.
"God he's such a douche" she whines wiping her at her eyes. "He's ruined my make up" she whines.
Lexa laughs through her tears with one thing on her mind.
"I'm ready"
She's readier than she's ever been.
----
It's worse. So much worse than Lexa expected. Tears were constantly threatening to fall from the moment she walked down the aisle. The garden Clarke had choose was beautiful and spacious. Even looking at the simple white chairs with pink bows tied around them had Lexa's heart hammering against her chest, because Clarke had done all this, she had planned all this on her own while she was off working. She felt like she was being married in a beautiful forest with trees that brought a beautiful twinkling spark with fairy lights wrapped around the trunks and along the branches. Her heart acked with pride because it was a beautiful picture. The first tear fell as she began walking down the aisle, she was greeted with two beautiful bouquets of lilies while hundreds of roses were perfectly dotted around. When she made it to the end of the aisle it only got worse as Abby stood waiting proudly with a kiss and cuddle. "Look at you" she beamed proudly as her bottom lip trembled while shaking her head. Lexa's tears fell heavily as she desperately tried blinking them away. Who would have thought the day you get married would make you cry more than you ever have? When Abby sat down wiping at her tears, that's when Lexa's heart really started to pound as she looked out to all her friends and family, even some people she had never met. She swallowed thickly as she faced the priest, reminding herself to breathe, it didn't help with her nerves though, especially now that she knew Clarke was next.
The music started and Lexa froze.
This was it.
This was the moment.
Inhaling deeply she turned around preparing for something that she could never possibly prepare herself for.
It was useless, it was always going to be useless.
Her eyes didn't even need to land on the target for her tears to be falling heavy because Clarke's smile spoke directly to her heart. She closed her eyes as Clarke raised a teasing brow at her, but even from afar Lexa could see Clarke's glistening eyes, she could never mistake those eyes. Each step felt like forever, yet not long enough, because as Clarke got closer Lexa ached to be holding her, yet never wanted to stop seeing her like this, happy, beautiful, free.
"you look.." Lexa whispers as soon as Jake lets Clarke go, she takes Clarke's hand in her own and finds herself completely speechless.
"Beautiful" Clarke breathes back her eyes trailing Lexa's dress with a vigour she's never seen before. "I'm speechless" she confesses while ignoring all the rules at a wedding. She kisses Lexa before Lexa can complain about traditions and bad luck because how can she not when she's standing there looking stunning.
Lexa doesn't complain at all, she kisses her back as their tears fall.
Only when they hear there audience laugh does Lexa pull her lips from Clarke with a blush to her cheeks. It's only then that Lexa realises how many of her friends and family are actually crying, even if Anya is rolling her eyes at the obvious.
"Shall we get married" Clarke grins through her own tears.
"Please" Lexa pecks her lips once more and suddenly Lexa knows why Clarke's been dreaming about this her whole life.
---
"You're smiling" Clarke comments squeezing her wives hand as she pulls her closer.
"So are you"
"Hard not to" Clarke confesses. "I just married my everything" The confession is soft and sweet that it makes Lexa want to cry for the millionth time in just one day. When Clarke leans forward and captures Lexa's lips in a slow sweet kiss she doesn't care much for the party ready to start around them, she just want's to take Clarke home and kiss her till the sun comes back up, because Clarke Griffin is her wife.
"Could everyone please welcome the married couple to the dance floor pleas- Clexa get your arse on the dance floor!"
Having Raven's voice interrupting the DJ has Lexa and Clarke pulling away instantly and focusing on the Latina.
"Raven give the man his mic back!" Clarke orders.
"I will when you get on stage, he's introduced you twice already and you haven't moved. Now move, rest of us want to dance and party to you know, now scoot!"
Twice? When did that happen.
Neither of them question it as they make their way to the centre of the stage, now it was Lexa's turn to be nervous.
"What song have you chosen?" Clarke questions cheekily with a raised brow.
It was Lexa's responsibility to choose their song for their first dance. She may be a little nervous. It had been a entirely different song all together for the last three weeks, but for some reason something didn't feel right and she changed it just last week, after she discovered the stress Clarke had been feeling.
"You'll see" Lexa beams bringing her wife closer to her without permission. "Are you ready Mrs Griffin"
"With you? I can't remember when i wasn't" Clarke quips tightening her grip as the lights dim out.
The moment the first bit of music plays through the speakers Clarke's laughing and all Lexa can do it laugh back.
'Your love, lifting me higher,
then I've ever. been lifted before,
So keep it up,
Quench my desire,
And i'll be at your side forever more,
"Jackie Wilson" Clarke beams "You know tradition has it, you're suppose to pick a slow song"
"Well seen as tradition involved you marrying a man, i suppose we're excluded" Lexa points out. "Now show me how to really dance" Lexa orders remembering the time she came home from work one evening and Clarke had this song booming from their speakers while dancing around the kitchen. Lexa of course watched for as long as possible without being noticed, which eventually ended up with her having sauce smeared across her cheek for being sneaky. She didn't mind it one bit, it was worth that and so much more just to be able to say she watched Clarke dance in the kitchen while shaking her entire body like a rattle while her head went wild, it was the most carefree moment Lexa had ever seen Clarke dance, that and Lexa didn't stop teasing her for a week about it.
Without another word Clarke's arms dropped from Lexa's neck with a devilish smirk.
"You asked for it" Clarke grins while still keeping hold of one of Lexa's hand as if ordering her to do the same.
Like many months ago, Clarke let go and let her body jump and shake around like a mad person, well as much as her dress would allow her to and of course, Lexa did the same. Hand in hand, they laughed and jumped around without a care while each time they built there selves up for the chorus and the moment it hit, their hands were in the air, or wrapped around one another singing from the top of their lungs.
'That's why your love, keeps lifting me higher!
Keep on lifting
Higher and higher!
I said your love'
" I love you so much" Clarke declares as people begins joining in towards the end of the song.
"I hope so" Lexa hums her arms wrapping around Clarke in an embrace that declares they will forever be together. "I love you"
"When can you take me home" Clarke says cheekily her eyes looking around the party that's unfolding. Looking for an escape route.
"We can't leave yet" Lexa laughs.
"You're no fun" Clarke pouts.
Lexa laughs but kisses Clarke anyway. There was no way they could leave yet, the speeches were yet to be spoken, Lexa could only imagine what it would be like when its time and the brides are no where to be found.
"Fine, i suppose i can wait a little bit longer" Clarke breathes as they begin slow dancing to some song neither girl can hear. "So tell me, did you pick a backless dress because you know how appealing i find it?"
"Maybe" Lexa beams. She would be lying if she didn't keep it in mind when deciding on the right dress. That and Costia's 'Holy fuck' made her decision easy. "Your dress is beautiful Clarke" Lexa admits her eyes trailing down the shoulder less dress that hugs her breast perfectly. Clarke definitely took Lexa's thoughts in consideration too.
"Well i have my wife to thank for that" Clarke breathes blue eyes sparkling at the new term of engagement that they can now use "Wife" She breathes once more in disbelief. "There's no getting rid of me now you know?"
"Thank god" Lexa hums cupping Clarke's cheek before trailing her bottom lip with her thumb.
"Al right love birds, break it up before you start creating magic babies on the dance floor" Anya smirks throwing her arms around the pair. "So tell me how does it feel to be Mrs & Mrs?"
"Better than i ever imagined" Clarke admits after a moment.
"Great. Lets burst that bubble with some speeches!" Anya winks.
---
Traditions were the maid of honour would write a speech and embarrass you a little because its clearly their fun duty of the night, while the father of the bride or in this case brides would declare how proud they are, how they wished them luck and maybe even cried a little as they handed their daughter to another declaring it's their problem now. Lexa had learnt all this from the movies she had watched over the years, she even took it upon herself to google the order of a wedding, what things she would need to say or write about and the things best to avoid, thankfully the speeches were rarely required from the married couple but would occasionally stand to thank everyone for coming and sharing their special day. The moment she read that she stopped worrying altogether and didn't write a speech at all, because she had no doubt if any of them stood up to thank their guest, Clarke would do it in a heart beat. The thing is despite the many years that had passed since meeting Clarke some things never changed. Lexa would still fiddle with her clothing around her family when she was nervous, she would still struggle to express her emotions vocally despite the huge improvement, she would still turn shy and quiet but the difference now was she knew everyone around her loved her, she knew they knew of her habits and they aren't easily broken after years of being a certain way. Instead Clarke would kiss her, hold her and make her talk without even being aware. Clarke always had a way with her and somehow the rest of the family learnt it too. Singing in front of thousands of people each night was completely different, they were strangers, people she would never see again yet still Clarke gave her that confidence from the very beginning to do that too. So when she found out it wasn't required to do a speech Lexa give up as quickly as she was willing to start. She never started on a speech yet she found herself standing up the moment Jake finished.
Her heart pounded just as quick as everyone surprised expressions turned to her.
And holy shit she didn't write a speech!
"Hi" Lexa said nervously filling the silence, she had no idea what she wanted to say or why she even stood up in the first place, she just knew after hearing everyone declaration of love and how proud they were she had something to say.
Clarke reached for her hand from beside her and gave it a gentle squeeze encouraging her like she always did, giving her strength.
She can hear everyone laugh at such a start and Lexa feels silly for ever standing up at all. Yet another squeeze of Clarke's hand has her looking in to blue eyes and without really knowing what she wanted to say to start with words were leaving her mouth.
"When i first met Clarke i didn't like her" Lexa confesses turning to face her wife who rolled her eyes. "She wanted me gone from her bedroom just as much as i wanted to leave, not to mention she was a little mean" Lexa smirked to which Clarke pouted. "However that changed within a week" Lexa confesses her smile dropping as she speaks from the heart. "She was patient, kind and she cared about everything i spoke about. She showed me what it's like to have friends as she shared hers with me, she showed me what it was like to be able to trust someone but more importantly she showed me what it was like to have a family" Lexa confesses her eyes tearing up. "I didn't know it then but i was slowly falling in love with my wife to be and i just want to take this moment to tell her how thankful i am every single day because without her i would have nothing" Before Lexa could finish Clarke was on her feet pressing her lips to Lexa's in a tender kiss.
"It's me who would be nothing" Clarke mumbles between kisses while everyone clinks their glasses and drinks their drinks.
Lexa couldn't help but curse her ability to talk for the thousandth time because she had so much more to say, so much more to express but not the way she wanted it.
She kisses Clarke and knows one day she will succeed in that task.
----
"I feel like i live in this blind fold" Clarke complains as she sits in the back of the car blind to the world. "This is a kink isn't it?"
"It's the last time i promise" Lexa laughs pulling the car to a stop. "I have one last surprise for you"
"Can't it wait till we've had sex first?" Clarke pouts. Lexa's glad she's blindfolded so she can't see the blush to her cheeks.
"It will take two minutes i promise" Lexa assures jumping out the car before rushing around to help Clarke out to. "You need to take two steps" Lexa instucts guiding her to the front door. Clarke does exactly as told with a cheeky smirk.
"Lucky i trust you huh? or i could be stepping of a cliff willingly, would it be suicide or murder?"
"Stop talking!" Lexa laughs. "Don't move"
"i can hear keys, have you just put these over my eyes to bring me home?"
Lexa says nothing as she guides Clarke pass the front door of the house and in to the hall.
"Our home" Lexa says softly as she stands behind Clarke and pulls the blind lose. "Yes"
It takes a second for Clarke to move as her eyes scan around the foreign place. Only as she turns around to ask questions Lexa answers them for her with a nervous smile.
"Welcome home" Lexa breathes nibbling on her bottom lip.
It's the third time fourth time Lexa's seen Clarke stunned in the last seven days. The first was when she got home early, the second was when she organised her to fly to Paris to find a wedding dress. The third was when Clarke was walking down the aisle towards Lexa and the forth, well that's right now.
"Our home" Clarke repeats walking in to the living room to see it all beautifully fully decorated with pictures framed of their friends and family.
"I thought we would need our own place" Lexa breathes as Clarke's smile begins to light up the room as she turns to face her wife.
"Lexa"
"We can change anything you don't li-"
"Lexa you better be kissing me already because im about to lose my mind" Clarke says in a rush and just like that Lexa's lips are on Clarke's hungry full and with meaning. It's a kiss Lexa's been waiting to do all day and if the way Clarke's lips are chasing hers are anything to go by, Clarke's been wanting nothing more all night too.
"I love you" Lexa mumbles between kisses.
Words have never been spoken more true.
They kiss. Bite. Suck. Moan
Everything is tingling.
---
Lexa ends up showing Clarke around the house the next morning half naked but with smiles that could just eat each other up. They christen every room twice because Clarke says its bad luck if they don't, the second time is just to guarantee it. Neither of them leave the house for three days and for two days neither of them wear any clothes at all. Texts go ignored, calls go unheard but neither of them care enough to stop.
"You got a house with a lot of rooms" Clarke acknowledges leaning against their kitchen cupboards as she cuddles up to Lexa's side while eating ice cream.
"Good hide and seek places for our future children" Lexa says smoothly brightening Clarke's smile even more. "Do you like it?"
"I love it" Clarke breathes before she's forgetting all about the ice cream and focusing on the warmth of Lexa's lips around hers.