Wrapping
Erin and Holtz get back from the mall and drop their bags in Holtz’s living room. She calls out a greeting to the chinchillas while Erin kicks off her boots and removes her layers. She watches with a smile as her girlfriend skitters across the room and pokes her fingers through the massive hutch that houses the furry animals. She’s so adorable.
“You think they’re getting in the Christmas spirit?” Holtz asks from her place in front of the cages.
“The chinchillas?”
“Children.”
“Sorry.” Erin pauses. “I mean, it’s kind of hard to tell, isn’t it? They can’t talk, so…”
“But do they seem festive to you?”
“I don’t…know.”
Holtz tsks. “Okay, so do you want to start wrapping now, or take a recuperation break to watch a Christmas movie? Or do you want to put one on to watch while we wrap? So many choices.”
“I feel like if we don’t start now, we’ll lose any momentum we’ve built up while shopping. Basic physics. So, why don’t we put on a movie and start?”
“I like the way you think.” Holtz strides over and gathers up her bags.
Erin follows her into her bedroom, where she keeps the only TV in her apartment. Erin flops down onto the bed and stretches out while Holtz goes and pokes her head into the closet.
“I’ve got some wrapping paper in here somewhere,” Holtz says, her voice muffled.
“What movie do you want to watch?” Erin picks up the remote.
“I think I’ve got Rudolph on DVD.”
“And where…might that be?”
“Ah…right.”
Erin laughs. “Should I find whatever’s playing on TV?”
“Maybe.” Holtz pulls her head out of the closet, brandishing a few tubes of wrapping paper. “Ah hah!”
She throws them and they land on the bed. Erin picks one up. “Holtz.”
“Yeah?” Holtz moves her bags to the bed and then crawls over them and plops down next to Erin.
Erin holds up one of the tubes. “This is not Christmas paper.”
“I never said it was Christmas paper. I just said I had some stuff we could use!”
“I’m not using this! Rainbow polka dots are not festive!”
“I beg to differ. Come on, haven’t you heard of making the yuletide gay?”
Erin shoots her a look. “You can use this. I’ll just have to hazard the mall again to get some acceptable paper.”
Holtz sticks out her tongue and grabs one of the bags. She pulls out the gifts for Kevin and grabs one of the rolls of paper. “Find a movie yet?”
Erin is flicking through the channels. She lands on something that looks Christmassy and sets the remote down.
Beside her, Holtz pulls out a stretch of paper. A second later, she starts ripping it.
“Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!” Erin says, reaching a hand over. “What are you doing? Scissors, Holtz!”
“I’m down, but let’s clear the bed first.” Holtz waggles her eyebrows.
“That’s not even…” Erin shakes her head and sighs. “Seriously, though—”
“Seriously, though, don’t take this so seriously. It’s just wrapping presents! This should be fun!”
“I’m going to get you scissors,” Erin says, and pushes herself up off the bed. She ambles into the kitchen. While she’s there, she makes sure to hide her super-secret bag further under her purse so Holtz won’t go snooping. Even if she does poke around in there, it probably won’t give everything away…but Erin would still like to keep this particular present as much of a surprise as possible.
She returns with a pair of scissors and a roll of tape, because knowing Holtz, she would probably concoct some alternate adhesive strategy if left alone. She wordlessly passes the two to Holtz, who is sitting cross-legged on the bed with her head bent over the agenda for Kevin. She’s picking away at the price sticker on the back.
“What the hell do they attach these things with?” she asks without looking up. “I feel like I could save tons of time on soldering if I used this adhesive instead on my machines. Impossible to get off!”
“Would that be safe?”
“You are just being the ultimate fun police today, aren’t you?” Holtz says with a grin.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Erin says as she climbs onto the bed. “I just get stressed out at this time of year.”
“You’ve gotta embrace the mania of it all and have fun with it. Why don’t you help me out with these, and take a crack at the Holtzmann Method?”
Erin bites her lip for a moment. “Why don’t you show me the rest of the Holtzmann Method, and then I’ll decide?”
Holtz grins and resumes her tearing of the wrapping paper. “I’m just going to leave the sticker. What’s the likelihood that Kevin will even notice it’s there?”
“What’s the likelihood that Kevin will turn up before February?”
Holtz laughs. She sets the agenda down on the paper—face up, Erin notes—and pulls the paper around it. She tears off a huge string of tape and sticks it on haphazardly so it barely holds the pieces together. Next, she folds up the ends in a way that’s nowhere near the correct method, and adds another mess of tape all over it. For good measure, she takes the tape roll and wraps it around the entire present once, then twice. She tears the strip off and pats it down, then pushes it across the bed towards Erin.
Erin just stares down at it. “Well that’s…certainly something. Think you’ve got enough tape, there?” she teases.
“Your turn!” Holtz says brightly.
“You’re just trying to get me to do your wrapping for you.”
“Dr. Gilbert, I would never!”
Erin stares at her for a few seconds, then pulls the roll of paper towards her as well as the cheese kit that’s Kevin’s other present. She unrolls enough paper to cover the gift, then reaches for the scissors.
“Nuh uh! Tear it!”
Erin rolls her eyes and slowly starts tearing the paper. She knows she can fold the edge over, which she does anyway to correct the straightness.
“Rip it like you mean it!” Holtz says.
Erin obliges, and then before she realizes what’s happening, the paper has slipped and sliced her finger. She drops the roll in surprise. “Shoot!”
“What happened? OH! Paper cut?”
Erin nods and waves her stinging finger in the air.
Holtz crawls over, crinkling the paper on the bed between them, and grabs Erin’s hand. “Oh man, would you look at that? You got yourself good.”
“It’s a tiny paper cut.”
Holtz ignores her and holds Erin’s hand up in front of her face to inspect her finger. “It’s bleeding, Erin! WE’VE HAD A CHRISTMAS FATALITY!”
“Stop shouting. It’s a paper cut!”
“WE MIGHT HAVE TO AMPUTATE.”
“Holtz.”
“STAY WITH ME, ERIN. WE’RE LOSING YOU!”
“Holtz.”
“DO NOT DIE BEFORE CHRISTMAS.”
“Holtz. Are you done?”
“CLEEEAAAR.”
Holtz tugs Erin’s hand up and sticks the offending finger in her mouth. Erin immediately yanks it out. “Really? There’s so much bacteria in there!”
“Erin. Did I save your finger? This is very serious business.”
Erin shoves her with a smile. “You’re such a dork.” She climbs off the bed. “I’m going to go rinse your spit off my finger. Maybe you should take over the wrapping again, huh?”
Holtz points her finger. “Hey! Did you do that on purpose so you could get out of wrapping?”
Erin pauses at the door. “You know, maybe subconsciously.”
“Dedicated,” Holtz says with a grin, “I like it.”
Erin blows her a kiss and does an exaggerated curtsey. As she walks away, she hears Holtz start wrapping again.
By the time she gets back (with a tiny Bandaid on her cut, which Holtz makes fun of her for), Holtz has wrapped the cheese set in her typical fashion, using the crumpled paper that she crawled over. Erin slides back onto the bed and cuddles into Holtz’s side to watch her girlfriend wrap. She makes sure to get some ribbing in about Holtz’s style, and Holtz retaliates with some jabs about her ‘injury.’
All the stress of the season seems to melt away with each moment that passes, and for the millionth time, Erin finds herself so grateful that she has Holtz by her side this Christmas.