the howler
“Carm, your sleeve is going in your coffee,” Laura said, biting back a smile as she watched her still half asleep girlfriend reach over her coffee mug for the tray of rye toast.
Carmilla scowled and snatched her arm back, huffing when she found that the edge of her sleeve was soaked in coffee. Laura chuckled and turned back to her breakfast as Carmilla pulled her wand out to dry herself off.
The Great Hall was done up for the holidays, to the nines, as usual-- several tall Christmas trees covered in silver and gold ornaments stood around the Hall, and a great wreath hung on each fireplace. Two gleaming menorahs sat on each house table, and one on the staff table, in the center in front of Headmistress McGonagall’s seat, the appropriate number of candles in their places. Evergreen garlands were wrapped around the torch pillars, and the floating candles seemed to glow brighter than normal, despite the grey light that filtered in through the windows. The tables were stacked high for breakfast, the scent of pancakes and eggs, bacon, kubaneh, idli, and a dozen other dishes wafting through the air.
“Hey look, the mail’s here!” LaFontaine said cheerfully, setting down their fork as they scanned the owls, looking for the one headed for them.
Laura glanced up as well, but Carmilla continued to focus on her breakfast. It wasn’t often that she got mail unless it was Mattie who sent something so she never looked out for an owl headed her way.
Which meant that she was quite startled when a small red envelope landed in her plate.
And the color drained from her face when she realized what it was.
A hush fell over the group as Laura looked over to Carmilla, immediately concerned to find Carmilla staring blankly at the howler siting in her plate. “Carm?” She asked, her stomach twisting as she lay a hand on Carmilla’s forearm. There was only one person who would send Carmilla a howler, and a howler coming from Maman was far beyond bad news.
Carmilla didn’t answer, but as the howler began to shiver on top of her toast, she snatched it up, gripping it tightly, and bolted from the table. She hurried down the isle between the Hufflepuff and Slytherin tables, her heart in her throat as she willed the howler to remain quiet for another moment, just to give her time to get out of the Great Hall.
Startled, Laura glanced at the others who looked equally at a loss for words, and then shot up, hurrying after Carmilla. “Carm!” She called, her black and yellow robes fluttering behind her as she sprinted out of the Great Hall. She skidded to a stop at the entrance, whirling around to try and find where Carmilla had gone, and caught sight of a door swinging shut out of the corner of her eye. She whipped around and ran to the broom closet to the left of the great doors that served as the entrance to Hogwarts, her hands slamming against it. “Carm? Carm!”
Carmilla ignored Laura’s calls and let go of the howler, knowing it’d only get worse if she didn’t just get it over with. The howler unfolded itself, the paper mimicking Maman’s smirk disturbingly well. Like every other time, the howler zipped up to Carmilla’s ear and began speaking in that low, threatening tone Camilla knew so well and hated just as much.
Carmilla would have rathered she yell.
“Mircalla, I am disgusted. A mudblood, darling? I thought you had more respect for our family name, a willingness not to tarnish it more than you already have by allowing yourself to be sorted into anything but our beloved house. But fraternizing with this scum you call a girlfriend who is not only a disgrace to the name of Wizard but also a Hufflepuff, is crossing a line. I’m just pleased that William told me. Why can’t you be an obedient child like your brother? You are the only one who is truly my blood, the heir to our name and status and this is how you repay me? Break it off immediately, or you may not return to my home.”
The howler shook and sputtered, tearing itself up as it finished speaking, the bits of paper fluttering around Carmilla’s shoulder and catching in her hair.
Carmilla stood there silently for a moment, shell-shocked and her stomach twisting as the message sunk in. Maman knew about Laura. This was bad.
And she was going to kill Will.
She took a shuddering breath, and uncurled her hands, willing them to stop shaking as she reached for the doorknob to let Laura in, who hadn’t stopped calling for her through the whole thing. Honestly, it was the one thing that had kept Carmilla grounded for the last few minutes.
As soon as the door opened, Laura burst through, throwing her arms around Carmilla. “Carm what happened? What did she say, I didn’t hear yelling, are you okay?” She said, spitting out questions a mile a minute as she pulled back to take in Carmilla’s face. Carmilla looked frighteningly blank, her eyes wide, like a deer caught in headlights. “Carm?” Laura said again, her stomach twisting at the look on Carmilla’s face.
Carmilla took a breath, her cheeks growing pink in embarrassment at how she’d run from breakfast. She knew Laura was nothing but concerned but she still wasn’t used to someone coming after her. To someone seeing her like this that wasn’t Mattie. “I’m okay, cupcake,” she said quietly, her arms settling around Laura’s waist.
“You don’t look it,” Laura said honestly, and Carmilla winced. She couldn’t keep a secret from this girl. “What happened, Carm?”
“Will snitched,” Carmilla sighed, leaning into the hand Laura had placed against her cheek. “Maman knows about us and she’s angry,”
Laura’s eyes grew worried, her grip on Carmilla tightening ever so slightly. “because I’m not pureblood, right?”
Carmilla nodded, letting out a sigh. “Yeah,” She reached up and tucked a stray strand of honey hair behind Laura’s ear and let her thumb brush Laura’s cheek. “she wants me to break up with you, or else I’m not allowed back at the manor,”
Laura’s heart dropped to her feet, a lump forming in her throat. “Carm, I--” She began, but before she could continue, Carmilla laid a finger over her lips.
“I don’t care what she says,” Carmilla continued, not wanting to give the glassiness in Laura’s eyes any time to grow worse. “I’m not going to let you go because of her dark age thinking,”
Laura gaped at her, her lips parted against Carmilla’s thumb. “But you need a place to live,” She said weakly, unable to hide the hitch in her throat.
Carmilla shook her head. “I have a room at Mattie’s, remember? I’m there most of the time anyways. I won’t let you go over this,” she said again, soft but firmly, suddenly feeling clearer than she had since before the howler dropped onto her plate, but something twinged in her chest. “unless you...want me to,”
Laura’s eyes widened, her grip on Carmilla’s robes tightening. “No!” She said, louder than she meant to. “No, never,” She said again, quieter this time. “I never don’t want you around...I just want you to be safe. Though you weren’t very safe with her to begin with,”
Carmilla shook her head, breathing out a sigh of relief at Laura’s words. “I’ll write to Mattie,” She said, bumping her forehead against Laura’s. “Ask her to move my things to my room at her flat, there’s not much at the manor. I got along well with Maman’s house elves, I’m sure they’ll pack it up for me. I’ll be fine. I’ll just stay here for Christmas as usual,”
“What if you came home with me for Christmas?” Laura asked suddenly, looking up at Carmilla, her eyes wide and hopeful.
Carmilla’s eyebrows shot up, surprise clearly written across her pale features. “I--” She started, and tilted her head a little, her brows furrowing. “You’d want me to?”
“Well, yeah,” Laura said, shrugging one shoulder. “I don’t want you to be lonely on Christmas because I know you are when you stay here alone, even though you say you aren’t. I know you like the quiet, but doesn’t the castle get too quiet sometimes? My house is cozy, and there’s a lot of little corners you could go to to read if you did want to be alone. And, well, we’re together, and I’d miss you really, really a lot for two weeks, I did last year, and my dad would be fine with it, I’ve told him about you and he seems to like you--” Laura cut herself off, her cheeks growing red as she realized what she was saying. Carmilla was still looking at her, confused, and a lump rose in her throat again as she started to backtrack. “Unless you don’t want to,” She said quickly. “if you think that’s moving too fast or, or you want the time alone--”
Laura’s words came to stop as Carmilla gently pressed her thumb to her lips again, a soft smile on her lips and wonder in her eyes. “You really want me to come home with you?” She asked, seemingly in awe of the little Hufflepuff in front of her, though not for the first time. She moved her thumb to Laura’s chin, gently swiping it back and forth.
“Yeah,” Laura said earnestly, nodding. Her neck warmed at the feeling of Carmilla caressing her chin.
Carmilla smiled, and ducked her head a little, before pressing a kiss to Laura’s lips. “Okay,” She said, the fluttering that’d suddenly taken up residence in her stomach a mixture of nerves and happiness, the howler feeling suddenly distant.
Laura’s eyes widened. “Okay?” She said excitedly, a smile breaking across her face.
Carmilla nodded, a small laugh escaping her lips. If anything was a cure for a howler from Maman, it was seeing Laura happy.
Laura squealed and pressed a firm kiss to Carmilla’s lips. “I’ll write to dad tonight.” She said, still grinning. Her face softened though after a moment, still seeing an edge in Carmilla’s soft eyes that hadn’t been there before the howler. She tucked a stray curl behind Carmilla’s ear, her thumb trailing along Carmilla’s ear. “You sure you’re okay?”
“I will be,” Carmilla said with a half smile.
“Want to go finish eating?” Laura asked, her hand falling to Carmilla’s, their fingers intertwining.
Carmilla looked past Laura and through the open door and to the Great Hall and swallowed. “I don’t think so, cutie,” She said. “I think I might go up to the seventh floor,”
Laura nodded, glad that she’d be somewhere comfortable. “Want me to come with you?”
Carmilla shook her head. “No, you go to class,” She said, “I know how much you love Transfiguration, and you have it today, right? I think I might just go to sleep for a bit, it won’t be very exciting. I’ve been able to summon up that room that you like a few times, maybe I can get it to do it again,” The corner of her mouth twitched upwards.
Laura breathed out a laugh. “Sounds good,” She said, wrapping her arms around Carmilla again. “if McGonagall asks, I’ll just say you’re not feeling well,” Laura hugged her tight and then kissed her softly, smiling against Carmilla’s lips as she felt the Ravenclaw relax against her just a little bit more. “See you at dinner? Or I could get you something from the kitchens,”
“Maybe something from the kitchens,” Carmilla said, “we could go to the library during dinner,”
Laura smiled. “Okay,” She nodded and pecked her cheek, turning to leave.
“Laura?” Carmilla said.
Laura paused and looked back to her. “Yeah?”
“I--Thank you,” She said, her thumb rubbing back and forth along the handle of her wand. “for everything,”
Laura beamed at her. “Of course,” She said with a shrug like it was the most natural thing in the world. She blew her a kiss and was suddenly gone in a flutter of yellow and black robes.
Carmilla was still wrapping her head around the fact that it was the most natural thing in the work for Laura. And she supposed it was for her too. She’d do anything for Laura.