another summer
Jason goes to the same school Cordelia’s brother went to. A secular private school. Kyle had an academic scholarship, same as Jason does now. She feels nostalgic for her school days as she walks down to the school with Whizzer on a tuesday afternoon in spring. It’s her night to watch Jason, but Whizzer’s tagging, of course. He’s walking behind her, snapping pictures. She’s whistling. Suddenly he calls her name and she spins around to see what’s wrong, there’s a click of a shutter and then Whizzer emerges from behind the polaroid camera, grinning. She rolls her eyes at him and continues to walk. He walks beside her, shaking the film like a tambourine. Once it’s developed he holds it up to her like he’s five again and showing her one of his crayon drawings.
Admittedly, it’s a beautiful picture. Cordelia is suspended mid-turn, head facing the camera and body turned slightly, her hair like a stained glass halo around her face. He’s managed to catch a bush of yellow roses behind her. They offset her pink dress. Her expression is neutral, but there’s a slight glint in her eyes. She looks luminescent. He takes out a biro, scribbles ‘dee, going to pick up j // 6.4.81’ on the bottom of the film and passes it to her. She sticks it in her front pocket. There’s a moment of peace, then they hear the end of day bell go off at the end of the road and sprint to make sure they’re not late.
They get to the front gate of the school and stand aside so as not to be crushed by the onslaught of screeching eleven to thirteen year olds. Jason comes careering round the corner, greets them (‘hiya, doda ‘delia! Hey, Whizzer!’) and asks if they can go play chess in the park. Whizzer and Cordelia, as the soft step-father and godmother, say yes to that and yes to ice cream and yes to soda and yes to that new David Bowie tape and yes to those new headphones. Whizzer and Delia sit on the park bench, watching Jason get a checkmate in two moves against some poor kid and eating ice cream.
“Do you think we’re too soft on him?” She asks. He shrugs.
“Someone’s gotta be. He can’t spend all his time in the hothouse.”
“True.” She turns back. Jason is close to beating a scrawny ginger kid about five years older than him. He’s staring the kid down, moving his pawn without looking at it. The kid looks like he might piss himself. Cordelia feels a surge of pride. The kid makes a move, and suddenly his knight is close to Jason’s king. She’s on the edge of her seat, and realises that Whizzer is too. Jason frowns. Lifts his hand. Cordelia holds her breath. And then suddenly click-clack-click and Jason has the ginger kid’s king and Cordelia and Whizzer both yell out in triumph. Jason screeches with joy, throws the king in the air and runs for a victory lap of the park. Whizzer cheer him on. Cordelia shakes her head at both of them, then stands up, hugs Whizzer from behind and speaks:
“I used to think we’d have kids together.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“I thought it was just me.” He mumbles.
“Nope... I just assumed we’d be each other's beards forever.”
“Me too.”
“Do you think we’d ‘ve been happy?” He pauses once she says that, then takes a deep breath and speaks:
“...maybe. I’m not sure. You can’t miss what you’ve never had, I guess.”
“That’s true.”
“But… I’m glad that we’re where we are now, y’know?”
“Yeah, I know. Now is… Good.” Just as she says that Jason finishes his victory loop and runs over to hug her. She hugs him back softly, pinches his cheek and tells him it’s hometime.
They walk back to Charlotte and Delia’s in a line, Jason and Whizzer chatting about baseball cards and Cordelia fiddling with the s, looking polaroid through Whizzer’s pictures from today. One of her, one of the sky, one of Jason on his run, one of an abandoned chess set, one of the tape and headphones, one of Jason and Delia hugging and one of Jason’s sneakers in the sun. They’re perfect snapshots, she thinks. Pitch-perfect crystal-clear segments of the day. She’s in awe of them. She writes captions on all of them in Whizzer’s favourite ‘subject // date’ format, then carefully puts them away and joins in on the conversation.
She spends the rest of the evening watching tv with Jason and listening to Whizzer playing piano next door. Charlotte comes home at eight and is so great at dealing with Jason that it makes Delia’s heart soar. Maybe they’ll adopt when they’re older. She’d love kids. As she thinks that Whizzer swings into ‘love me do’. His voice is clearly audible through the red brick wall, strong and cheerful and beautiful. He splits it into a ragtime style and she can hear him laughing as he does. She hums along. She knows he knows she’s humming, even if the piano’s too loud for him to hear it. He finishes the song with a mad crescendo, all lows and highs and riffs, skids his fingers across all the keys and ends. She claps her hands and whoops until she can hear him laughing and thanking her through the wall.
Marvin picks Jason up at ten. Jason hugs Char and Cordelia goodbye and (after a pointed look from Marvin) thanks them for picking him up and for dinner. Marvin asks Delia if Whizzer’s home. She tells him yeah he’s in, playing piano. Marvin’s face lights up. He thanks them and swans off, Jason in tow. Once they’re gone Charlotte and Cordelia high-five as a celebration of being Really Great G-dmoms, kiss quickly and run into the den so as not to miss M*A*S*H. Charlotte falls asleep with her head on Cordelia’s shoulder. Cordelia is enamoured. She toasts herself and her family before drifting off to sleep with a smile on her face. All is well.