Drabbles From Before

Drabbles:
1. NSYNC
Joey put his arms around Chris as he stirred the pan of hot milk. He was making hot chocolate. Joey knew it was a childhood ritual. Chris’s mother had always made him hot chocolate when he was upset.

Today had been a hard day. Joey’s harness had come loose during sound check. Chris had watched as Joey had fallen out of the harness. It had only been a couple of feet, but it had reminded him of Joey’s pain when his leg had been caught in the trap door. He needed the comfort of Joey’s arms and of hot chocolate.
2. BSB
Brian grabbed the ball out of Nick’s hands and dribbled toward the net. Nick chased after him, yelling. Brian kept going, laughing. When he made a basket, he threw up his arms and bowed to the crowd.

Nick threw him the ball. “Come on, doofus. Are you playing or not?”

With a grin, Brian threw it back to him. He came rushing up to Nick, trying to steal the ball again. This time Nick was ready and feinted in the other direction, turned and threw the basketball.

This time it was Nick who laughed and bowed to the imaginary crowd.
3. NSYNC/BSB
Nick was curled up in Lance’s arms. It was an uncomfortable position, especially since Nick hadn’t moved for hours. Lance had talked to him about his day in a quiet rumble, trying to soothe him to sleep. Unsuccessful, he’d softly sung a gospel song. He smoothed his free hand up Nick’s back, through his hair and back again while the other held Nick close. When he ran out of gospel songs, he sang old country standbys. Nick lay, unmoving, tears slowly slipping down his cheeks. Nick always needed Lance to comfort him when he returned from visiting AJ in rehab.
4. NSYNC
JC bent down to place the ice pack on Chris’s knee. Chris sighed in relief, stretching it out.

“What did your Mom say about her birthday present? She like it?”

“Yeah, she said thanks for sending it.”

JC handed Chris aspirin and a glass of water.

“I’m glad. She’s hard to shop for. You’ve provided them with everything they could possibly need. Or want.”

Chris shrugged. “Now that I can, I want to.”

JC knew the subject was closed. He reached down to massage Chris’s knee, stretching it a little more. Chris grunted with pain, but then sighed in relief.6
5. O-TOWN
Eric was panicking. He’d tried to find the most unthreatening girl for Ashley. He’d helped Ashley go through the tapes to find the finalist. He’d helped him choose the homeliest one. He didn’t like having pretty girls around his boyfriend. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust his angel; he knew that nobody else could be trusted to resist him. But choosing that particular girl had been a huge mistake. His angel was so sweet that he couldn’t find the words to say no when the girl wanted to marry him. Ashley had signed the paper and now he was married._
6. NSYNC
Chris watched as Lance danced with a girl on the dance floor. It didn't worry him, though it was more grinding than dancing. Watching his young lover dance made him hot. Lance knew it; he never failed to put on a good show for Chris's enjoyment.

Chris knew when they returned to their room that Lance would growl his name from deep in his throat, begging for his kisses. Lance would stretch against him, wordlessly asking for his touch. What happened now didn't matter because it wasn't real. Lance's only reality was Chris's body pushing into his. Now didn't matter._
7. NSYNC
"Why the hell do you always have to get in the middle when we fight? It's not any of your damn business! It's between us. Why the hell are you jumping on me? I'm not the one who was kissing a girl!"

"If you hadn't been cuddling Kelly in the corner, he wouldn't have been kissing her!"

"Fuck you, Chris. I wasn't cuddling her. She's the mother of my child. We were talking about Brianna!"

"Don't be stupid, Joey. That's exactly why Justin was so upset. She has a history with you! He doesn't feel he can compete with that!"
8. NSYNC
After Dani left, Lance watched Chris. He watched him ache with pain and loneliness. He watched how everyone tried to talk to him, tried to make him talk. He watched how Chris began to shy away, to curl into himself. Even when Chris was there, he really wasn’t there. He was lost to them.

Lance watched as Chris came closer and closer to him. He didn’t try to make him talk, didn’t try to fix him. He allowed Chris his silence. Provided a haven for Chris to be quiet. Allowed him the time to heal. He watched and he waited.
9. NSYNC
Justin took a drink from his glass, pouting because he and Lance had been unable to go clubbing with the rest of the guys. Though Chris had been nice enough to leave a bottle of vodka for them.

“What do you think the other guys are doing right now?”

“The same thing we’re doing.”

“Getting drunk.”

“And getting laid!”

“Justin, what makes you think that you’re getting laid?”

Justin just gave him a look.

Lance giggled and took a drink directly from the bottle.

“Well, ok, since you did ask so nicely.”

He put down the bottle and kissed Justin._
10. NSYNC
“Have you thought of doing that?”

Chris looked up surprised. “What?”

Justin worried at the hem of his shirt. “That song you’re listening to. Do you think like that yet? That you just want to get off the merry-go-round, to not play the game any more?”

“Sometimes. When I’m tired or late at night. Then I think about it and realize that no, not yet. Later, but not yet. I’m not ready to give this up. Give you up.”

“Even if you gave this up tomorrow, you wouldn’t give me up. I love you.”

Justin smiled at Chris’s shocked look.
11. NSYNC
Justin pressed his lips to Chris’s cheek in a quick kiss. “Thanks for listening to me talk about my brothers, man.”

“Hey, I just wanna keep up with what’s happening with the rugrats. They’re all right. For rugrats.”

“Well, thanks.”

“If you really want to thank me, you can give me a real kiss.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes, if you don’t feel like it’d be moving too fast.”

“Chris, you’re the one who hasn’t even kissed me yet. I’ve told you I’m ready for this.”

“Justin, you know why.”

“Well, I’m 18 today. So now I want my kiss. I’ve been waiting.”
12. O-TOWN/NSYNC
Ashley pressed deeper into JC’s arms with a long, tired sigh.

“I’m so tired of it all.”

“I know.”

“Everyone always wants something from me. Everyone’s always watching me.”

“I know.”

“I have no time for myself.”

“I know."

“I’m tired of being Ashley Angel, the pretty boy of O-Town.”

“I know.”

“I’m tired of no one knowing the real me."

“I know you.”

Ashley looked into his eyes, realized JC did know, and kissed JC’s smiling lips. Knowing that JC knew the real him, the man and not the sweet boy he pretended to be, made it all bearable._
13. NYSNC
Justin raised his face to the sun. He was sitting in a glade in the woods, having a picnic with his lover. After they’d eaten, JC had fallen asleep beside him on the blanket. All he could hear was the soughing of the wind through the branches above them and JC’s soft breathing.

He was happy to be back from a successful cross-country concert tour. Now he’d be able to spend more days like this with JC without worrying about prior commitments, without worrying about the other guys, and now without worrying about Britney.

He sighed happily in utter contentment._
14. NSYNC
Justin flipped through all the pictures they’d been given by management. He was supposed to be looking at pictures of himself. They wanted his decision on which pictures to include in the concert tour guide by the end of the day. But he couldn’t concentrate. He kept going through JC’s pictures. He’d always known that JC was a good-looking man, but he really hadn’t known.

“Damn, JC, when did you get so hot?”

“Did you say something, Justin?”

Startled, Justin looked up at JC. “No, I didn’t say anything.” Blushing, he looked down again.

Justin kept looking at the pictures.
15. NSYNC
“So when did you know?”

“Know what?”

Justin dug his chin into JC’s shoulder, but JC kept watching TV and didn’t pay any attention to him.

Justin sighed.

“You know what I mean!”

“No, I don’t. Tell me.”

“When did you know that you loved me?”

“I’ve always loved you.”

“JaayCeee!”

“Oh, you wanna know when I knew I was in love with you?”

Justin pouted.

JC glanced back at him.

“Remember the first concert we had in Paris? I looked at you and I knew then.”

Justin was shocked. “That long ago?!”

“I told you I’ve always loved you.”
16. NSYNC
''You know I can’t do this any more.”

Justin quickly turned around from the mirror. “Do what?”

“I can’t be with you in private while you’re with Britney in public.”

“JC, you know why that is.”

“Yeah, so no one will know about us. I don’t care. I can’t hide any more. I need someone who will love me no matter what.”

“You’ve found someone who can be with you in public?”

“I know someone who’s willing.”

Justin sucked in a swift breath in pain.

They were both quiet for a moment.

“Please don’t leave me. Please. I’m willing too.”
17. NSYNC
“Haven't you wondered what we could've been?”

JC didn’t look up from his songwriting. He cocked his head to indicate that he was listening. He continued writing in his notebook.

Justin kept flicking glances towards JC, but did not turn directly toward him. He looked out the window of the bus. He listened to the hum of the wheels on the road, to Chris’s soft murmur coming from the back of the bus.

“Do you wonder how different things would be if we hadn’t given up on loving each other?”

JC stopped writing and was still for a moment.

“Sometimes.”__
18. NSYNC
JC was running his hand over Justin’s head in a continuous motion. When Justin had returned from the barber, he’d been shocked to see his new buzz cut. He’d been loud in his complaints about Justin’s decision to cut it. He loved Justin’s curls. They had made a very good handhold when he needed it.

He could feel the prickle of short hairs against his palm, scraping at the sensitive pads of his fingertips. Memories of the same sensation running across his inner thighs from the last time Justin had buzzed his hair were running through his mind. JC smiled._
19. BSB
Brian was laughing at Nick’s antics. He was going around giving everyone a noogie. He laughed even harder at the look on Kevin’s face when Nick surprised him with one. Kevin scowled, but there was a twinkle in his eye that hadn’t been there before.

Brian started backing away when he saw Nick coming in his direction. Nick had already managed to give the other guys a noogie, but Brian was determined to escape. He took off running down the hall laughing loudly, with Nick on his heels, calling out “Brian, you can run, but you can’t hide,” giggling madly._
20. NSYNC
Every time I try to walk away
Somethin' makes me turn around and stay
And I can't tell you why

“I can tell you why.”

Chris turned around to face Joey with an inquiring look.

“What are you talking about?”

“That song that you’re singing. I can tell you why.”

“Why what?”

“Stop playing dumb, Chris. You stay because you’re in love with him. Otherwise, you wouldn’t.”

Chris sighed in defeat.

“I don’t want to be, especially on days like today, when he’s a prick.”

“Justin’s a kid. He’ll grow out of it. He won’t grow out of loving you.”_
21. NSYNC
Chris had been in a bad mood all day, so when the doorbell rang, he was tempted to ignore it. When the ringing wouldn’t stop he stalked across the foyer to yank it open.

“What the fu..”

Justin was standing there, holding a basketball.

“Will you come out and play with me, please?” Justin was trying so hard to look adorable that he looked like an idiot. Chris knew he was doing it on purpose to make him laugh.

Chris said no and tried to close the door.

Justin looked so crestfallen that Chris couldn’t resist laughing and saying yes._
22. NSYNC
JC watched Lance sitting across the conference room table, a look of concentration on his face. Lance was listening to Management give them updates on the status of their concert sales, so he was extremely focused.

JC was also extremely focused, but not on Management. He was focused on the finger that was tracing Lance’s lips. It would slowly run across the top and then back to the bottom. He was so focused on the finger that it took a moment to see the smirk on the soft lips. Hmm, Lance wasn’t as focused on the meeting as he thought._
23. BSB/NSYNC
“Damn! Justin, get up! It’s really late. The damn alarm didn’t go off. You have to go.”

Nick poked Justin in the side. Nick poked him again. Justin just mumbled and rolled over. Nick pulled off the covers. Justin burrowed deeper into the bed. There was more reaction after Nick smacked Justin’s ass, but he didn’t get up. Not even when he did it again.

“Justin, get the hell up. Unless you want to tell Kevin and the rest of the guys what you’re doing sleeping in my room.”

At that, Justin jumped out of the bed in a rush.
24.BSB
“What is this?”

“Some Spanish CD your brother sent me.”

“He still does that?”

“Yeah, he says he’s trying to educate me. He says I’m just too damn gringo.”

“Next time he says that, tell him that thing about glass houses.”

“Yeah, like that’ll happen. As it is, your brother barely tolerates me.”

“I like this. The singer has a good voice.”

“What’s he saying?”

Howie lifted his head from Nick’s chest to listen to the music.

After a minute, he laughed. “My brother sent you this?”

“Yeah. What’s so funny?”

“Your loves don’t matter. Your past doesn’t matter.”__
25. BSB
Brian tried not to laugh. He just couldn’t help it. It was funny. Going by the expression on his face, Nick didn’t think so.

Nick pouted.

Brian laughed.

Nick pouted even more.

Brian laughed harder.

After a minute, Nick started laughing. “Brian, shut up, dork. Go get them for me.” He pointed at the brightly colored swim trunks that had washed onto the shore.

“You want me to get them for you and you’re calling me names?”

Nick pouted again. “Come on. It’s not like I can go.”

“Why not?”

Nick looked around at the crowded beach.

“Fine, I’ll go.”_
26. NSYNC
Joey was chasing Brianna, who was giggling and trying to chase Lance. She wasn’t totally steady on her feet yet, so she kept listing to the side. She was chortling and yelling “Ance, Ance.”

Lance was laughing, backing away slowly from Brianna. He would wait and then move backwards.

Joey stopped to watch as Brianna finally ‘caught’ Lance. Lance reached down to pick her up. Brianna’s peal of laughter rang out as he threw her up in the air. Joey watched entranced as the sunshine haloed them in gold. He felt his heart swell with love as he watched them.
27. NSYNC
The first thing the guys noticed was JC’s cursing. He did it much more now then before. Then they noticed the frequent calls and how furtive he looked while talking and giggling. He would disappear for hours at a time without a word. They asked him about it, but he would not answer.
So they decided to find out on their own.

One night, they waited till late then snuck into his hotel room with a stolen key. They quietly tiptoed closer to the bed. They strained hard to see in the darkness.

“What is Eminem doing in JC’s bed?!”__
28. BSB/NSYNC
Howie ran his hands through his hair nervously before pressing the doorbell. He wasn’t sure if he was doing the right thing. He and Chris had been friends for so long.

He was tired of being alone. He was ready to be with someone who knew him and understood about the life he led. So he’d asked Chris out on a date.

But now he was having second thoughts. He was afraid of losing their friendship. Outside Backstreet, Chris was the best friend he’d ever had.

Howie was nervous until he saw Chris’s smiling face and remembered why he’d asked._
29. NSYNC
Lance and JC had been casual lovers for a long time. Lance wasn’t sure how things had changed so much. He thought it started when Britney had broken up with Justin. Maybe it had started before then. He didn’t know. All he did know was how things were now.

He and JC had spent so much time comforting Justin they didn’t notice when they had fallen in love. Justin was the one who clued them in. It had taken them longer to realize that they had also fallen in love with Justin. Even longer to realize he loved them too._
30. NSYNC
Lance was the calm center around which they all revolved. He was the one they all came to when they needed someone to understand them and hold them while they talked. He was the first to know of Kelly’s pregnancy, of Dani’s departure, and that Justin was leaving Britney because he and JC had fallen in love.

So when he was the one who needed, they all came to him. They would lay on the bed listening to him, petting him. Because he would wait until he was nearly drowning in his emotions, he needed them all to hold him. 31. NSYNC
Justin knew it was going to be hard, but he’d really had no idea. He thought he would be able to handle it. It had seemed like such a simple thing really. He and JC were going to be only friends again after so many years of being lovers.

JC had said that he couldn’t be with him any more, that he couldn’t handle the secrecy, so they’d both decided to go back to being just friends. Justin had fooled himself into believing it would be alright. He’d convinced himself that he didn’t need JC’s love.

He’d been so wrong.
32.NSYNC
“Justin, open the door.”

JC knocked loudly. “I know you’re in there. I saw you go in.”

“Open the door! If you don’t open this door, I swear I won’t talk to you for a month.”

The door swung open slowly.

Justin stood in the doorway without speaking, looking miserable.

“Baby, this isn’t easy for me either.”

Justin’s face was set in a mutinous expression.

“Justin, you know I still love you. I just couldn’t deal with the hiding.”

“You don’t love me enough to stay with me no matter what.”

“I couldn’t. Baby, I can’t. I was dying inside.”_
33. NSYNC
“Britney, you know I love you, right?”

“Yeah?”

“You know I’m not in love with you, right?”

“Duh! Justin, of course I know you don’t love me. You’re gay. Which pretty much means you don’t love me.”

“Sometimes I wonder. I’m not always sure that you don’t believe all the PR too.”

“Oh, honey, I know I have my Nick moments, but I’m not a natural blonde. I know you’re still in love with JC. Knowing you, you’ll probably always be. I know that you know I still love Nick, no matter what I say about him.”

“Yeah, I know.”
34. NSYNC
Justin talked with Lance, Joey, and Chris. He told them about drowning in the whirlpool that was his life. He told them about nights where he didn’t sleep at all, in so much pain that he couldn’t escape from it into sleep. He told them about days where he’d driven across the state-line determined that he was never going back. He told them about the times that he had been tempted to escape his life into the sweet oblivion of drugs. He told them of the agony of being without JC’s love. And they understood what he had to do.
35. NSYNC
“Johnny, I can’t hide it any more.”

“Justin, you don’t know what you’re talking about. You don’t know how this will effect everything.”

“I am not a child, so don’t treat me like one. I’m prepared for the consequences.”

“Are the others? Because you know it will impact them too.”

“I’ve already discussed it with them. They know why I want to do this and they agree with my reasons.”

“I don’t know why you want to announce you’re gay. Especially right now. You know everyone will say this is why you and Britney broke up.”

Justin was silent.

“Oh.”
36. NSYNC
“So Justin do you have a boyfriend?”

Justin turned to look toward the reporter, aware of all the cameras rolling.

He was quiet for a moment.

“I did, but”

JC interrupted him to say, “Yes, he does.”

Justin looked at him and then softly said, “Yeah, I do,” and flashed a brilliant smile to all the reporters and repeated, “Yes, I do.”

He felt JC grasp his hand underneath the table.

“Who is he?” came from all directions.

“Well, I don’t think that I should say right now.”

JC placed their joined hands on the table and said, “It’s me.”_
37. NSYNC
“You know we can’t do this. Especially not here.” JC emitted a long, lush moan as Justin bit the tendon in his neck.

“I know. But I have to touch you. It’s been sooo long.”

JC giggled as Justin licked his way up his neck and then gasped when he bit down on his earlobe. “It was just this morning.”

“I know. That was such a long time ago.” Justin nibbled his way back down JC’s neck and stopped to lave his collarbone.

There was a hard knock at the door. “5 minutes to air, guys.”

“Come on. Oprah’s waiting.”
38. NSYNC
“Today, we’re talking to Justin and JC from NSYNC. Can you tell me why you decided to announce your relationship now? I’ve heard that you’ve been together for a while.”

“I’ve been in love with JC for so many years. I wanted the world to know how much I loved him. We were both tired of hiding, always being afraid of being caught.”

JC interjected, “We have such wonderful fans. We felt that we weren’t showing faith in them by trying to hide from them.”

“And now I can do this,” with a grin, Justin scooped JC into a kiss._
39.NSYNC
Justin bit JC’s lower lip gently, then licked it better. He pressed light kisses down JC’s torso and scraped his teeth across a pebbled nipple. He rubbed his lips against the soft skin of his chest, moaning JC’s name. He was so hungry for the feel of JC’s skin against his own.

He groaned as he felt JC’s nails rake down his back. The sting just added to his thirst. He felt parched. He wanted to absorb JC into himself, though he knew it would never be enough. He couldn’t get close enough to quench the thirst raging through him._
40. NSYNC
After listening to a series of clicks and a low hum, Lance heard the line ringing. His Dad tried to make it better, but he needed to talk to the only person who really could.

He was exhausted. He’d spent long hours on a late flight directly after a concert. When he and his Dad arrived in Russia, they had gone directly to the doctors’ office. He’d been poked, prodded, and pricked by many different doctors, many speaking English with such a thick accent that he hadn’t understood what they were testing for.

He heard someone pick up. “Hello.”

“Chris.”_
41. NSYNC
Chris gave the lock on the door a vicious twist. He wanted to make sure that no one would be able to get in. He just wanted some time to himself. He needed it.

He wanted to not worry about the guys. Not worry about Johnny or his family. He wanted some time where no one was demanding anything from him.

He knew if he didn’t hide from everyone, he would eventually end up saying something he would regret. It wasn’t anyone’s fault he was feeling overwhelmed. He was feeling pulled into so many directions. He just needed to regroup.

42. NSYNC
Justin was used to getting what he wanted. He’d been able to get anything or anyone he’d wanted since he was 14.

But he’d been disappointed too many times when he’d found out that his lover wanted Justin Timberlake of NSYNC, not the boy who liked to play in the rain and watch old black-and-white movies. When he’d decided the heartbreak wasn’t worth it any more, he’d asked Britney to be his girlfriend. He’d known Britney was a safe choice.

Every once in a while, he would wonder if that someone was out there, if he’d given up too soon.
43. NSYNC
Joey would sit on the bus and plan. He’d think about Brianna’s graduation, her wedding, and what her kids would look like. He’d planned out her life in many different ways. Then he’d laugh at himself because he knew it was out of his hands. She was barely a year old and already very independent.

He'd planned ways to tell Kelly he loved her and wanted to get married, to tell her that he’d like to make a home with her, to have more children with her. He’d made so many plans and one day he’d do everything he planned._
44. NSYNC
JC woke up one day and made a decision. He wasn’t going to worry about what people thought about him any more. He’d spent too many years hiding behind a mask. He’d shown people only what they’d expected to see, a bland, boring façade with no depth.

He’d decided to stop hiding. He’d hidden his love of bright, shiny clothes. He’d always kept his hair short, even though longer hair fascinated him.

He wore anything he wanted, no matter how bright. He grew out his hair. He painted his nails. He did exactly what he wanted. And he was happy._
45. NSYNC
“Hey, babe, how’s it going?”

“Good, so far. I think. Hell, I don’t know. I can’t understand half the stuff anybody says. Even the translator.”

“How’s your Dad doing?”

“You know how he is; he loves to do new things. He’s having fun.”

“How about you, Lance? You sound beat.”

“I am so fucking tired. I can’t even keep my eyes open. I’ve been poked at all day. And I swear they took a gallon of blood. They did so many different tests. I’m going crazy. I just had to call. I needed to hear your voice.”

“Yeah, me too.”_
46. NSYNC
Joey knew they couldn’t resist. Every so often, they just had to tell the world about their love. Even if the world didn’t know it. He’d done it at the Houston concert. And Justin had done it at the Phoenix concert.

They took pictures of each other with a fan’s camera. Since it was a candid picture, they let their love show on their face. The fans got a picture they then posted on the net. They thought it was so funny that nobody actually saw what was so clear to them, the love in their eyes for the photographer.
47. NSYNC
“Don’t be afraid of this. I love you.” Justin pressed a tender kiss to JC’s temple.

“I know. But I am afraid.” JC felt Justin tense against him.

“Are you afraid of everyone’s reaction?”

“No! That doesn’t matter to me. I’m afraid of how much I want this. How much I want to be with you. If this goes wrong, it will devastate NSYNC, devastate us.”

“That won’t happen. You know I love you and I know you love me. You have to have faith. You have to trust in us. Just remember I love you and we’ll make it.”_
48. NSYNC
“Justin, you have to get up. It’s time to go.” Lance pounded on the door.

He threw a shoe at the door, “Lance, shut up already. I’m up!”

He heard a muffled groan beside him.

“JC, we have to get up.”

“It’s too damn early.”

“I agree. But we have to go. Soundcheck starts in an hour.”

“Justin, it’s your fault it’s so hard to get up this morning. I kept telling you we should go to sleep last night.”

“Yeah, but it was too much fun. Even if we only slept for an hour, loving you was worth it.”
49. NSYNC
JC was busy writing when suddenly he asked, “What are different shades of blue?”

Chris came up with midnight blue, indigo, azure, aqua, and navy.

Joey’s response was cerulean, periwinkle, turquoise, and teal.

Lance supplied robin’s egg, aquamarine, denim, cyan, and blizzard blue.

Justin contributed royal, sky, and steel blue, and laughing, Duke blue and Carolina blue.

“Cerise”

“Hey Joey, that’s not blue.”

“I know, but doesn’t it sound like it should be?”

“Why the sudden interest in the color blue, C?”

“I’m trying to find a word that best describes Justin’s eyes.”

Everyone groaned and threw pillows at him.
50. BSB
Brian knew he had no right to feel the way he did. He just couldn’t help it. Nick had always been Frack to his Frick. They’d passed so many years joined at the hip. After he’d met Leighanne, he hadn’t noticed the gradual separation. Now it was all he saw.

Nick wasn’t his best friend any more. He was Howie’s. Howie was the one who helped Nick plan and execute his practical jokes on the rest of them. Now, it was Nick&Howie, not Frick&Frack. Though he hadn’t known how close they were till he found them kissing on the bus._
51. BSB
“Why do you do that?”

Howie looked up confused. “Do what, Nick?”

“For 9 years, I’ve been wondering why you always do that.”

“You’ve wanted to know for 9 years and you haven’t asked me? I didn’t think there was anything you hadn’t asked me.”

“Shut up. Why won’t you sit at the corner of a table? You always move.”

After thinking for a minute, Howie started laughing. “When I was really little, Mama told me if I sat there, I’d never get married.”

Pulling Nick into his arms, “I might not. Not unless I can do it with you.”
52. BSB
Nick tried to swallow. He tried again. “Brian, I’m really happy for you. She’s going to love the ring. It’s pretty.”

“Pretty? Pretty? Man, I’ll have you know it took me a month to find it!”

“She’ll love it.”

Uncertainly, “You really think so?”

“I know so. Now go tell the other guys.”

Nick watched as Brian left his hotel room with a huge grin on his face.

With a heavy sigh, he sat down on his bed. He couldn’t let Brian know how much it hurt to see him with someone else. He’d always hoped Brian would love him._
53. BSB
Nick hesitated at the door to Kevin’s room. He could hear the guys laughing and congratulating Brian. He knew he had to join in to allay any suspicions. He took a deep breath, put on a bright smile, and stepped into the room.

“You know we have to paaartaay. Because once Brian’s married, the ball and chain won’t let him out!” Everyone laughed at AJ’s antics, including Nick. He knew all the other guys, except Brian, could tell his heart wasn’t in it. AJ was covering for him. Nick appreciated the effort.

Nick kept laughing, with tears in his eyes.
54. BSB
Nick had been sitting there for a while, remembering.

Scenes from the last six months had been cascading through his mind. He had noticed most of his memories involved Howie. After Brian announced his engagement, the guys had gathered around him, trying to help. They had known of his feelings for Brian.

He’d turned to Howie the most. He’d been the easiest to spend time with. Howie’d been able to help him cope with the pain.

Nick finally realized he missed Brian, but he didn’t hurt any more. Thanks to the man sitting next to him, quietly watching him think.
55. BSB
Nick started looking at Howie. And he noticed that Howie was looking back. Howie started flirting with him, giving him slow, sweet smiles, glancing up at him through his lashes.

By unspoken agreement, they’d decided to take things slow. They didn’t touch any more than they had before, though they’d started holding hands. They were spending all of their free time together. But they never really did anything.

Till tonight. Nick had pressed a kiss against Howie’s neck during a hug. He’d pulled back, pressed another to Howie’s cheek, then to his mouth.

Howie had smiled and kissed him back.
56. BSB
Howie was standing in the doorway, watching his lover dance. Nick had cranked up the stereo and was dancing all over the living-room. His movements were fluid and graceful. He was moving with such abandon, thinking himself alone.

Nick had really taken the criticisms about his appearance to heart, so Howie knew how rare it was to see Nick being so unselfconscious. Nick was carnal, beautiful, and sexy. Howie loved watching him be so free.

Howie noticed Nick watching him in the mirror. Nick gave him a smirk and a wink, curling a finger at him, inviting him to come closer._
57. BSB
AJ sat down next to Howie, reaching over to hold his hand. “Hey, viejo.”

He'd known when he’d walked in the door what Howie was doing. He had done it every March 31st for the last six years. He turned off the lights, lit a candle, and listened to Selena’s music. It made him feel better.

“Did I tell you I met her? Some friends and I went to one of her concerts. She was so real, so nice to everyone. She was so talented. Such a damn waste!”

AJ pulled Howie into his arms, “I know, viejo, I know.”_
58. NSYNC
Chris was feeling self-conscious about his braces again. JC could tell by the way he was hanging back during the photo shoot. He’d been a lot quieter than usual and hadn’t smiled once.

JC knew it was Lou’s fault. He’d been so critical of Chris’s teeth before and now of the braces that they’d become of paramount importance to Chris. He thought that they were extremely ugly, so he wouldn’t smile, wouldn’t even talk.

But JC also knew the thing to do to get him to forget the damned braces. He quietly snuck up behind Chris. And started tickling him._
59. NSYNC
Lance lay in the dark, listening to Justin breathe. He’d been trying to fall asleep for hours, but had been unsuccessful. All he could do was think about Justin and Britney breaking up.

He knew why they had. Wade had made her choose between pretending to be with Justin or being with him for real. She’d chosen Wade.

Lance didn’t blame either of them. Wade wanted to be with Britney without having to hide or having to watch her with Justin. He understood. It had been hard to watch.

He just worried about the scrutiny on Justin, about getting caught._
60. NSYNC
“I had a dream last night.”

“What about?”

When Chris didn’t answer, Joey looked up from his book. “What was it about?”

When Chris still didn’t answer, Joey put his book down and slid closer to him. “What did you dream about?” He pressed a kiss to Chris’s jaw. “Hmmm?”

“I dreamed about Kelly and Brianna.”

“What about them?”

“Kelly made you choose between…”

Joey pulled back and looked into Chris’s worried eyes.

“She would never make me choose between you and Brianna. She knows I love you both too much.”

Chris smiled as Joey pulled him into his arms._
61. NSYNC
“Is it time yet?”

Joey said no.

“Come on. It’s been months already. It has to be time already.”

Again, Joey said no.

“Joooeeeey. Puhleeeeeaaaase.”

“Nope. You made me practically shave my head right when we had all those interviews to do, Chris.”

“Yeah, but you made me wear that stupid hat. And you wouldn’t let me tell anyone I’d lost a bet. Everyone thought I was just being weird.”

“You mean more than usual?”

“Ha-bloody-ha!”

“You’ve been watching Spike again, haven’t you?”

“Let me cut off the damn horns. I lost that bet a loooong time ago. Enough already.”_
62. NSYNC
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say.”

“What the hell is there for you to say, Joey?”

Joey flinched. “I’m sorry, ok? I’m sorry, Chris.”

“Joey, it doesn’t matter how fucking sorry you are! It still doesn’t change that Kelly’s pregnant.”

Joey hung his head.

“I was gone for two fucking days, Joey. Two days. I come back and you don’t say anything. Now you do it because you have to.”

Joey was silent.

“Would you ever have said anything? If she wasn’t pregnant, would you have told me?”

Joey was still silent.

“I didn’t fucking think so.”
63. NSYNC
Chris watched as Brianna tried to walk towards him. She was giggling up at him. “Come on, baby. You can do it. Come to Poppa.”

Brianna stopped, pouted for a moment. When tears filled her big brown eyes, he wanted to go to her. “Come on, honey. You know you want this.” He shook a rattle at her.

Joey laughed at him. “You are such a pushover.”

It had taken a long time and a lot of work, but they’d made it. Chris knew it also had a lot to do with a beautiful baby girl who loved him too._
64. NSYNC
“I need to know what you feel.”

“Hmmm?”

“You’ve been spending a lot of time with Dani lately doing FuMan stuff and you’ve seemed a lot happier lately.”

“I have been happier. But it’s not because of Dani. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve enjoyed spending time with her lately. It’s good to be back on friendly terms with her and not just talking about work stuff. She’s a good friend. I’ve been happier because you have made me happier. I finally got what I have waited years for.”

“Years?”

“Joey, I’ve loved you for as long as I’ve known you.”
65. NSYNC
“I have decided who to ask.”

Chris didn’t answer. He looked like he was asleep on Joey’s chest, but Joey knew better.

“I’ve made my decision.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I know who Brianna’s godfather is going to be.”

“What’s there to decide? It’s going to be me.”

“You can’t do it.”

“Why not? I think I’d make a great godfather! Why can’t I be the godfather?!”

“Idiot. You really don’t know why you can’t be the godfather?” Joey softly bopped Chris upside the head, then kissed him.

“You can’t be the godfather if you’re going to be Poppa.”
66. NSYNC
Lance was supposed to be a sweet Southern boy who was good to his mother, always polite to everyone, and never swore. He was the good boy who never did anything wrong. No matter how much he wanted to.

He wanted to be the wild one. He wanted to be the one who said what he wanted to whoever he wanted, to wear what he wanted, who loved who he wanted.

He wasn’t supposed to want to go out without worrying what people saw when they looked at him. Though he did.

And he knew he never would stop worrying.
67. NSYNC
Lance hid a smile. He didn’t want anyone else to know what he was doing. Each time that JC came close, he rubbed up against him innocently. He’d subtly dabbed some of JC’s favorite cologne right at the base of his throat. When he spoke to JC, he whispered softly into his ear. He’d worn old torn jeans and JC’s favorite silk shirt that rubbed against his nipples.

He knew he was torturing his lover. But he also knew that when JC had had enough, he’d pull him into the bedroom and not let him out until the next day.
68. NSYNC
“So, Pop, can I go?”

“Honey girl, why are you asking me?”

“Because both Mom and Dad told me to ask you.”

Chris directed a soft “Wusses” to Joey, who nodded in agreement.

“I don’t know about this. You’re only 13.”

“Everyone else is doing it.”

Chris gave Brianna a look.

“Ok, ok. That’s not a good reason. Can I go?”

“We’ll have to meet him and his parents.”

“Aw, Pop. Come on, no way. We’re only going to a movie.”

“Yes, way. We’ll drop you off and pick you up.”

Brianna squealed and ran to the phone.

“Wuss.”

“Yep.”
69. NSYNC
Lance likes going home to Mississippi. He likes lying on the hammock in the backyard, feeling the cool breeze blow. He likes sitting on the porch, watching the sunset. He likes swimming in the pond on Mr. Johnson’s farm during the heat of the day and sneaking back in the middle of the night. He likes walking through the woods, marveling at nature’s beauty. He likes galloping across a meadow, with the wind rushing through his hair. He likes to lie quietly and trying to count the stars.

But Lance likes it best when Justin does it all with him.
70. NSYNC
I scrape my teeth across your nipple, then soothe it with a soft lick. I suck at the surrounding skin while rolling the other nipple between my thumb and finger. I hear you whimper when I run my hand down your side, caressing your warm skin. You moan so sweetly as I kiss my way down your torso. You lift your hips, begging for my touch. I lick till the sharp tang of your foreskin bursts upon my tongue. I suckle gently. I can hear your gasps of “Please,” and “Don’t stop,” when I nip gently down to the base.
71. NSYNC
Justin liked coming to Chris. He didn’t feel pressured to talk to him if he didn’t feel like it. He played videogames and didn’t ask why Justin came to his room at midnight. When Justin knocked, Chris would open the door and lead him to the playstation.

Everyone else kept bombarding him with questions about his breakup with Britney. Chris would talk to him about FuMan stuff and about the latest adventures of his sisters and their ‘idiot boyfriends’. Chris would be quiet when he needed him to be. So it was easy to talk when he was finally ready.
72. NSYNC
I enjoy watching your desperation, as I love you so slowly. You are a beautiful man, but when you beg for my touch, you are incandescent. Sweat blooms across your skin, your cheeks flush pink, your breath hitches, and you moan so sweetly.

You whimper, you groan, you gasp. You are so vocal in your desperation. Your cries make me desperate. I want to draw it out, to make it last, but when you call my name in a raspy voice that raises goose bumps upon my skin, I can no longer resist. I give you what you ask for.
73. NSYNC
Justin was having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. He’d woken up early and been unable to go back to sleep, no matter how much he tried. He couldn’t find his favorite shirt even though he’d looked everywhere. He’d called his Dad and had gotten into a stupid argument with him and ended up hanging up on him. Everywhere he’d gone, he’d been followed by the damn paparazzi, so he’d had to smile when it was last thing he wanted to do.

He wanted to crawl into JC’s arms and have him make it better. So he did.
74. NSYNC
JC was feeling blue. It didn’t happen often, but when it did he retreated from the world. Or he tried to. The other guys wouldn’t let him. Joey would share the chocolate chip cookies that Kelly sent him and make him listen to Brianna laughing and babbling on the phone. Lance would act out scenes horribly from different screenplays and laughingly ask for his ‘honest’ opinion. Chris would tickle him into playing video games with him. Justin would sing old songs and mangle the lyrics because he knew that JC couldn’t resist correcting him. JC usually wasn’t blue for long.
75. NSYNC
Lance ran his hands over his face, sighing in frustration. He was startled as he felt hands start rubbing his shoulders.

“You need to come to bed.”

“There’s just so much paperwork to do.”

“It’ll still be there in the morning. There’s nothing more that you can do now.”

“I just want this so bad. I want to do everything that I can to make sure this works.”

“It will. We’ve waited a long time. This will happen.”

Lance turned around into Chris’s arms.

“We’re going to the adoption agency tomorrow and we’ll bring home our beautiful baby. You’ll see.”
76. NSYNC
I’ve been feeling so restless lately, like I don't fit inside my skin any more. Lance is the reason that I’ve been going crazy.

I’ve always wanted to touch him, to drown in his beautiful green eyes, run my hands over every inch of his skin to see if it is as soft as it looks. But it’s too big a risk to run, if he isn't interested.

There are too many who would be interested in finding out my secret. I’ve never been so tempted to not care. But I can not risk losing everything, not even for him.
77. NSYNC
Lance doesn’t know how Chris always knows when he’s lying. No matter what he says or how he says it, Chris can tell when he’s lying. So Chris knows he’s lying when he says he doesn’t love JC any more.

Lance doesn’t realize that he momentarily holds his breath and can’t quite look Chris in the eye, always looks slightly to the right of him. This is how Chris can always tell when he’s lying and he’s not about to tell Lance. He wants to be able to tell when Lance isn’t lying any more. He’s patient. He can wait.
78. NSYNC
“Babe.”

“Please don’t, JC. We can’t do this.”

“What if I told you I’m sorry, that I still love you, that I need for us to be together?”

“It’s too late. We can’t go back. Too much time has passed. We both have someone else.”

“I know. But I don’t love her the way I loved you, Lance.”

“It doesn’t matter. I loved you then. I would have done anything to stay with you. You decided to let go.”

“It was a mistake. I got scared. I loved you too much.”

“I’m sorry. I love Chris now. It’s too late.”
79. NSYNC
Sometimes, the words overflow from me. The melody runs through my soul, the words through my heart. I have to sing. I have to let all of it out. Music springs from my lips. Otherwise, I’ll drown in the songs inside my head.

Sometimes, I have no words. The silence overwhelms me. This is when I come to you, to lay in your arms without saying a word. I feel the lack of music inside of me keenly. I need to feel you comforting me, replacing the silence with the beat of your heart, with the rhythm of your breathing.
80. NSYNC
“Big Daddy Rockstar? I can’t believe you wore that t-shirt!”

“Everyone thought it was funny. Even the teenies thought it was cute.”

“You really think so, huh?”

Chris pouted at him.

Lance quirked an eyebrow at him.

Chris pouted some more.

Lance smiled, then started chuckling. When Lance started losing his breath from laughing so hard, Chris stopped pouting. Chris looked at him for a moment, then grinned.

Lance pulled Chris into a kiss. “Thank you.”

“For what? For making you stop worrying so much about this space thing? You know you'll pass your tests. Everything will be all right.”
81. NSYNC
“Lance, I’m scared. I don’t know what the hell to do with my own life, let alone somebody else’s.”

“Stop worrying! It’s going to work out. You love Kelly; she loves you. You have a beautiful daughter with her. You’ve been together for years. This wedding is just formalizing a bond that you already have with each other. You’re lucky you can do this.”

“We are, aren’t we? I know how much you and Chris would like to do this. I’m being a jerk, aren’t I?”

“Yes, you are, but not because of that. Stop worrying. You’ll be happy together.”
82. NSYNC
“Did you tell him?”

Justin was silent.

“Damn, you wussed out again?! I thought that you had finally decided to just do it?”

“I was going to. But I couldn’t do it. I got too nervous.”

“I thought you wanted to be with him?”

“Chris, I really do. But what if he doesn’t want to be with me? What if it gets weird when he says no?”

“Someone told me that he wouldn’t say no.”

“Yeah, who?”

“A little birdie.”

“Named Lance?”

“I’m not saying. But you have to talk to JC! You’ve been in love with him for years.”
83. NSYNC
Chris could hear someone banging at the door. He tried to ignore them, but they wouldn’t stop. Pressing a last kiss to Lance’s mouth, he walked to the door and yanked it open. “What do you want, Timberlake? This had better be important. I was busy.”

Justin was standing in the doorway, so excited he was bouncing up and down. “Chris, I did it! He didn’t say no!”

“Then what are you doing here instead of with JC?!”

“Gotta go. See you later.” Justin ran back to JC, waiting in his room. Laughing, Chris returned to his own waiting lover.
84. NSYNC
“ JC, can I talk to you?”

“Sure, come in.” He stepped back and motioned Justin into the room.

JC watched silently as Justin sat down on the bed. After a moment, Justin jumped up and paced around the hotel room. He picked up JC’s notebook from the nightstand and placed it back down. He paced some more. He moved the dial on the radio to a different station then returned it to the original station.

“Justin, whatever it is, just say it. You’re starting to make me nervous too.”

“JC, I’m in love with you and have been for years.”
85. NSYNC
JC was stunned speechless at Justin’s pronouncement.

Justin looked relieved about finally saying what he’d waited years to say. “Aren’t you going to say anything?”

“I’m not sure what to say.” JC sat down on the bed, still looking confused.

Justin sat down next to him. “You could say you love me too.”

“I do. But am I in love with you? I don’t know.”

“Would you like to find out?”

“How would I…”

Justin pulled him into a soft kiss that lasted for several long moments.

JC tried to catch his breath. “I still don’t know. Do it again.”
86. NSYNC
“You can’t have him back.”

Tony stopped tuning his guitar and looked up at Justin.

“Why not? I think we could make it work. We were just too young last time. We’ve both grown up a lot. I know what I’m getting into this time. It’s going to take a lot of work, but it’s possible. It will be different. I’ve never stopped loving him. We’re still good friends and we can start over. He’s free; I’m free.”

“He’s not free.”

Tony looked confused for a minute then understanding dawned.

“I didn’t know.”

“Now you do.”

“Yes, now I do.
87. BSB
Kevin loved the other guys and wouldn’t do anything to hurt them, so he would never tell them that he felt sorry for them sometimes. They would never know the bone-deep certainty of knowing that you were loved for who you were, not for what you did.

He and Kristen had had a lot of ups and downs, but he knew she loved him as Kevin and not as Kevin Richardson, Backstreet Boy. He wished the others could have that, but knew they never would. They could never truly be sure of a lover. So he felt sorry for them.
88. BSB
Brian had made a promise. He was an honorable man and would never break it. He’d married Leighanne and was happy. Mostly. He wished he’d waited a little longer to do it. If he had, things might be different.

He hadn’t realized how different they were, how little they had to talk about. She seemed to like the other guys, so he was confused by her inability to bond with them. She didn’t like being alone so he spent less time with them to be with her. He was losing touch with them and with himself. They were now Brian&Leighanne.
89. BSB
Nick was feeling a little sad. He’d spent the day talking with Aaron about when the Backstreet Boys had toured Europe for the first time. He’d told him about traveling in an old beat-up bus, living in each other’s pocket, with no privacy. After a while, he’d looked forward to getting away from the constant togetherness. They all had.

Now everyone was so busy living their own lives, scattered across the country, they only saw each other occasionally. He was looking forward to being back in the studio so they could see each other daily. He’d really missed his brothers.
90. BSB
AJ was happy. It had been so long since he’d been happy that it had taken him a while to realize it. He had spent so many of the last few years living in a haze, trying to hide from the world. When he’d finally been able to look at himself and decide to stop hiding, his life had changed.

He’d asked for help. His brothers had helped. His mom had helped. The one who’d helped the most was Sarah. She’d stood by him as a friend, then later as a lover. Life was good and he was happy. Finally.
91. BSB
Howie was tired of being known as the sweet one. He was a nice guy, but he was not sweet. He had his moments of being an ass. Everyone did. But he was forever known as the sweet guy from Backstreet. This drove him crazy. He wanted be a jerk sometimes.

He wanted to be able to say no when someone asked for an autograph when he was eating. He wanted to say no when someone invited him to a fundraiser. He wanted to say no to anything without feeling guilty. But he couldn’t, because he was the sweet one.
92. NSYNC
“You’re doing it again.” Lance glanced at Chris without losing his focus on traffic.

“Doing what?” Chris appeared to be engrossed in the passing scenery.

“Stop pretending. I know you know what.” Lance stopped at a light and faced Chris.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, man.”

“Chris, how long have I known you? You really think you can hide anything from me? Babe, I can hear you freaking out from all the way over here. My family knows about us. They’ve known you for a long time and they really like you. It’s just dinner with my family.”
93. NSYNC
“ I’m not in love with him any more.” Lance looked up from the sink full of dishes.

Chris stopped drying a plate and turned to face Lance.

“What did you say?”

“I’m not in love with JC any more.”

Chris took a hard look at Lance, at the way Lance was looking at him straight in the eye and not holding his breath as he waited for Chris to respond.

Chris was pretty sure that Lance wasn’t lying, but he asked anyway.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I am.”

Chris let out a loud whoop and pulled Lance into a kiss.
94. NSYNC
Chris’s sharp gasp echoed in the bedroom. He’d just walked in and had been surprised by the sight of his lover, naked on the bed. Lance was moving his hand slowly down his torso, scraping a nail over a nipple, dipping a fingertip into the well of his navel, carding his fingers through soft kinky hair.

When Lance grasped his cock in a firm grip and pumped it, Chris gasped again. He moaned when Lance licked his lower lip then bit it as he continued pumping slowly then faster. He started panting when Lance motioned to him to come closer.
95. NSYNC
Justin dropped down unto the bed beside JC, stretching with a loud yawn. “I didn’t think it was ever going to end. I’m going to miss it, but I’m so glad that it’s over. We’re free. At least for eight months.”

After their last concert of the tour, they’d gone out clubbing with the other guys, but they’d been so tired, they’d come home early.

With a soft sigh, Justin settled into JC’s arms. He knew their hectic schedule would resume in a month, with their work on his album, but for now, they could relax and just be together.
96. NSYNC
Justin broke their kiss. “JC, I don’t know if I can do this again. Last time was really hard. If this isn’t going to go anywhere, let’s not start, ok? Hurts too much when you pull back.”

JC came closer and pressed his forehead to Justin’s. “It’s not going to be like that this time. I know this is what I want.”

“Are you sure? You’re not going to get scared and run back to Bobbie or something?”

“No, I won’t. No more Bobbie. And no more Britney?”

“No, no more Britney.” Justin leaned in and kissed JC’s smiling mouth.
97. NSYNC
“Can I trust the way I feel? Is it love?”

“Justin, you’re the only one who knows for sure. JC’s in love with you, so you have to be sure before you say anything.”

“How did you know you were in love with Lance?”

“I didn’t. Lance was the one who knew. He got tired of waiting for me to get a clue and finally told me.”

Justin laughed so hard at Chris’s admission he couldn’t breathe.

“Shut up, man. This isn’t about me anyway. Are you in love with JC?”

“I think I am. No, I know I am.”
98. BSB
“You know I love you, right?”

“Uh-oh, that doesn’t sound good.”

“Howie, I’m serious. You do, right?”

“Yeah, AJ, I know. Just like I love you.”

“You know I am always going to be in love with you, right?”

“This really doesn’t sound good. Babe, you’re scaring me.”

“I’ve made a decision. It’s going to hurt both of us, but I think it’s for the best. It’s something that I have to do.”

“Tell me already.”

“You know how Sarah has been there for me throughout this whole thing? She needs me. I’m going to ask her to marry me.”
99. POPSLASH
“Chrissy, it hurts so much!”

“Honey, I know.”

“I want to be mad at Justin for not trying harder, for deciding that he couldn’t deal with the pressure and us always being apart. But I can’t! I know he’s hurting too!”

“He is, Britney. Just because he didn’t know how to deal with being your boyfriend any more, it doesn’t mean he stopped loving you. You know he still does.”

“That’s what hurts so much. I love him; he loves me. Why can’t we be together?”

“Honey, you know why.”

“I just want it to be the way it was!”
100. BSB
“Alex, what’s the matter?” Denise pulled him into her arms.

“I screwed up so badly, Mamí!”

“Mijito, what did you do?”

“I asked Sarah to marry me.”

“Do you love her?”

“Yes.”

“Are you in love with her?”

After a pause, he said “No.”

“What about Howie?”

Surprised, “What?!”

“Did you really think I didn’t know? You’ve been in love with him for as long as you’ve known him.”

“I didn’t know you knew.”

“Would that have made a difference?”

His silence was answer enough.

“He loves you too. You can still fix this. Talk to her, then to him.”
101. NSYNC
“Are you sorry you did it?”

“I thought I might be, but I’m not.”

“Are you sure, Wade?”

“Yes, I am.”

“I was worried.”

“It turned out ok. You know that I had to do it. Lance, I couldn’t work for you and be with you too.”

“I know. But I don’t want you regretting it later. You’ll start resenting me, us.”

“Nope, never. It was worth it.”

“I wish we could spend more time together, but you’re still on Britney’s tour.”

“Now that you’ve finished yours, you’ll be able to come out. We can be together more often.”
102. “Feliz cumpleanos, niño.”

NSYNC/BSB
“Ooh, someone’s been hanging out with Howie again.”

“Shut up, little boy. I was calling to see if you were ready yet.”

“Almost. Y'all are done recording already?”

“I am. I told the others I had to jet. It’s not every day my baby turns 21.”

“AJ, you still haven’t told me where we’re going.”

“I ain’t gonna. Once we’re done with your official party, you and I will have our own. I know you love surprises. You’ll love this one, but you have to wait.”

“Will you make it worth the wait?”

“You know I will.”
103. NSYNC
Justin forgets sometimes. No, it’s not that he forgets; it’s that he doesn’t think about it. It has been such a part of his life for so long that it's no longer something that grabs his attention any more.

He’s in love with JC. He has loved him for so long, he doesn’t really remember a time when he didn’t. He knows there was such a time, but it’s been so long ago that it’s become a distant memory. His love for JC is just a fact about him. It’s become an irrefutable truth, like the color of his eyes.
104. NSYNC
JC felt completely disoriented. His whole world had just tilted off its axis. One minute he wasn’t in love, the next he was. The sense of free falling was very unsettling, but exhilarating. When Justin had touched his hand and smiled, he’d felt himself fall into Justin’s blue eyes. JC had gotten breathless, lost in the warmth of his gaze.

He’d realized that Justin had only ever smiled at him like that. Justin’s smile was tender and full of love. Love for him. And JC had felt it when he’d fallen in love with Justin. He returned Justin’s sweet smile.
105. NSYNC
Diane watched as her son’s lover got quieter and quieter. She’d been watching Chris as he paced back and forth. He had finally taken a seat, but had started fidgeting. That was normal for him, so she hadn’t worried. She started to worry when she realized that he hadn’t moved for over an hour.

“Chris, he’s going to be all right. This is a simple procedure and he’ll be out soon.”

“I know.”

“It brings back memories, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah. I can’t stop worrying because of it. I was so scared.”

Surprised, Diane said, “You loved him even back then?”
106. NSYNC
Chris traced random patterns into the palm of Lance’s hand, listening to the reassuring beep of the heart monitor. He was so intent on the sound that he didn’t notice when green eyes slowly blinked open, but Lance didn’t say anything until Chris pulled back from pressing a kiss into his palm.

Lance whispered, “You know if you asked me to stay, I would,” gently squeezing his hand.

Chris whispered back, “I know. That’s why I would never ask you to. You have wanted this for too long. But it’s good to know that you would do that for me.”
107. "You are such a dick, JC!"

NSYNC
"And you are a spoiled brat!"

"Bite me!"

Suddenly Justin found himself flying through the air. He landed on his back on the bed. Justin let out a loud oomph as JC landed on him. He stared up into JC's angry eyes.

"So, you want me to bite you, Justin? Are you sure you want me to do that?"

Justin continued to stare up at JC defiantly.

JC leaned down and whispered in Justin's ear. "Is that what this has been about? Do you really want me to bite you?"

Justin swiftly nodded yes.
108. NSYNC
"Come with me. You know you want to." Justin bit JC's earlobe then gave it a quick lick.

JC moaned, "Justin, you know I can't. I have to do that charity thing then. I already told them I'd be there."

Justin continued sucking at JC's neck as he whispered, "But I have to be in London then. I want you to come with me."

JC gasped as Justin bit him. "Okay."

JC knew that Justin could always get to him to do anything he wanted, but he was okay with being wrapped around Justin's finger. He knew it was mutual.
109. NSYNC
Lance bit the heel of his hand, trying to muffle his cries. He didn't want to be heard. He moaned quietly when Chris sucked at his hipbone.

Chris was always trying to get him to get loud when they were on the bus because Lance was always trying to not be heard. It had become a contest to see who would win.

It was always Chris. He drove Lance crazy with his mouth till he didn't care who heard them. He kept Lance right on the edge till he was frustrated enough to yell at him, "Just do it already!"
110. NSYNC
"What the hell is he singing?"

Startled, Chris looked up from the e-mail he was reading on his laptop. "Huh?"

"He's singing about kissing a guy and nobody said anything?"

"Lance, what are you talking about?"

"Listen to what he's singing." Lance reached over and started the CD again. "See, listen to this. Excuse me while I kiss this guy."

Chris looked at him at for a moment and then burst out laughing. He was laughing so hard that he couldn't catch his breath. "He's not talking about kissing a guy. He's singing excuse me while I kiss the sky."
111. NSYNC
"Chris, I swear if you call me again, I'm not answering!"

"But I'm bored! Come over and play with me. Or we can go riding."

"I can't. I'm supposed to have lunch with my boyfriend since I've been neglecting him lately."

"Come on, Justin. JC won't mind. Entertain me!"

"Yes, JC'll mind. He's already pissed at me for blowing him off yesterday because you wanted to go play golf. Call Lance."

"I can't. Do you know what time it is in Russia? He's probably asleep."

"Since you're being such a baby about Lance being gone, you can eat with us."
112. NSYNC
“I said I love you, but I lied. I didn’t know I was lying when I said it. I really didn’t. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you. I first told you that when I was 16. I just didn’t know any better then. It took a long time for me to realize that I was in love, but it wasn’t with you. You were always supposed to be the one that I was in love with, not JC. God, I’m so sorry. Please understand. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Britney’s tears slid down her cheeks without a sound.
113. NSYNC
Chris whispered, “You haven’t even left yet and I already ache with missing you. I know you have to go and I’m okay with it. Mostly. I am just not sure how to live life without you in it. You’ve been such an important part of everything for so many years. Even before we got together, you were always there. I’m so used to you. I guess I’ll have to learn to deal with it, huh?”

Synchronizing his breathing with Lance’s soft breaths, Chris eventually fell asleep. Lance opened his eyes and watched Chris as he lay sleeping beside him.
114. NSYNC
“Y’all have to promise that you’ll help him.”

Lance looked around at Justin, JC, and Joey. “He’s not dealing well with the thought of me leaving. I’m not sure how he’s going to deal when I really leave.”

“I know he’s really worried about it because he was talking to me when he thought I was asleep. You know he only does that when he’s really upset and doesn’t want me to know. I’m late. I gotta go.”

They watched him leave.

“Do you think that Lance will ever realize that Chris knows he’s awake when he talks to him?”
115. NSYNC
"I miss you."

"I miss you too. It's been fun running around with Chris, but it's not the same without you."

"JC, if you weren't such a globetrotter, you could be here with me."

"I know. But I had already committed to this trip with Chris before you and I got together. I couldn't get out of it. Aren't you really busy now anyway? Aren't you supposed to be recording with Brian today?"

"I did. It's good. It just isn't the same without you in the studio. I'm used to you being there, encouraging me."

"I'll be there soon, Justin."
116. NSYNC
Chris stretched, reveling in the heat of Lance's skin pressed against his own, a feeling of well being pervading his body. Lance's weight pressing him into the bed and his sigh of contentment making Chris smile.

"I've missed everything about being with you, but this is what I've missed the most: the warmth of your skin, the way it feels beneath my hands, the sounds you make when I stroke it, the way you flush pink all over when I lick it. I'm glad you were able to come visit."

Lance's quiet laugh rumbled against Chris's chest. "So am I."
117. NSYNC
Chris didn't want to go to sleep. His time with Lance was so short. Chris had to leave soon to attend a meeting he couldn't get out of and Lance was returning to Russia later that day. He wanted to spend as much time with Lance as he could, even if his boyfriend slept through some of it.

"Chris, go to sleep. You have to deal with that FuMan meeting later today. We'll have time together when I get back."

"You can't know that."

Lance gathered him close and kissed him. "I know that I'll always come home to you."
118. NSYNC
“JC, I am tired of this crap. How much longer do we have to do this?”

“You know that as long as we’re in the group, we have to.”

“I am so sick of this. We can’t even be friends? I wanted to go with you to the game last week and to the fight before that! We couldn’t because management is so damn paranoid they won’t let us go together. But it’s okay for you to go everywhere with Chris and me with Lance? I want to spend time with my boyfriend without hiding! I’m not ashamed of us!”
119. NSYNC
"It's not straight."

"Yes, it is."

"No, it isn't."

"I'm telling you it's straight."

"And I'm telling you it isn't."

"Justin, who's been doing this? Me, right? I did the wallpaper in the guest bedroom already, so I know what I'm doing. You've only just started helping."

"Yeah, but I've done it before. I helped my Dad do this."

"And how many years ago was that?"

"JC, it's crooked. You have to fix it before the glue dries or the whole room will be crooked. Come down here and look."

JC climbed down the ladder. "OK, maybe a little bit."
120. NSYNC
You have a best friend you've loved for years. Nothing happened, though you know he always loved you too. Now there's Justin. You want to be a trio. Justin and Lance do too, but they're afraid of their families' reactions. They couldn't deal with your families knowing about the three of you. You're not sure you could either. They're ok with you and Justin, but you don't how they'd react if they knew about Lance. You've talked about this. You even tried it for a while. It was hard, but it was wonderful. Sometimes you really wish it had worked.
121. BSB
AJ was desperate. He'd tried everything that he could think of to get Howie to talk to him. He'd stopped by his house, called him, sent him flowers, sent him e-mails, even called Howie's Mom to ask about him. After her cold reception, he'd realized how hard it was going to be to apologize. He'd never thought that Howie wouldn't speak to him.

He'd known he'd made a mistake with Sarah and had had to hurt her to fix it. Now he was the one hurting. He had to convince Howie he loved him. He couldn't be himself without Howie.
122. BSB
"Sarah, I'm sorry."

"For what, AJ?"

"Sarah, I can't marry you. I'm in love with someone else."

"With Howie."

"What?!"

"AJ, everybody knows that you're in love with Howie. When you asked me to marry you, I thought you had chosen me. I really thought you loved me because you had chosen me over Howie."

"Sarah, I am sorry."

"Leave, AJ. Go back to Howie."

"Sarah."

"Leave, AJ."

"Sarah."

"Leave! Damn you, AJ, don't you realize how much this hurts right now? Just leave."

"I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you."

"I know, but you did. Go now!"
123. BSB
"Ayudame, Mamí. Help me please. How can I convince him I love him if he won't even talk to me? He won't listen to me. I've tried everything. I'm afraid I've really lost him. I just want it to stop hurting. It hurts so much."

"All you can do is keep trying, Mijito. He will eventually talk to you. He loves you too much not to."

"I love him so much, Mamí. It's been so long since I've seen him. It hurts to not be with him."

"I know, bebe."

Denise held her son as he sobbed in her arms.
124. BSB
AJ walked towards the window and stared outside. He didn’t really notice the scenery. He was more aware of what was inside the house than outside. He stood by the window for over an hour trying to forget what he'd done. He'd been driving aimlessly when he'd stopped on an impulse. He'd sat in the parking lot of the liquor store for 20 minutes before finally going in. Now the bottle of tequila sat on his table. He’d paced back and forth, trying not to give in to the temptation.

AJ walked to the table and picked up the bottle.
125. BSB
{beep}

“Hey, Howie. I know you’ll delete this without listening to it. I know I’m the last person you want to talk to right now. I understand. I know how much I hurt you. Too bad I didn’t think of that before. But I just had to hear your voice. I scared myself today, babe. I bought a bottle of tequila. I came so close to drinking it. Too close. I couldn’t do it. I remembered how much I hurt you last time and I couldn’t do that to you again. I love you too much to do that."

“AJ?”
126. NSYNC
“Tell me you really don’t believe that! After all this time together? Tell me you don’t think that I settled for you because I couldn’t be with Dani any more!”

Lance’s silence was eloquent.

“Damn it, Lance! Dani and I had lots of problems. One of the problems we had was that I was in love with someone else and had settled for her. She couldn’t stand being second-best any more.”

Lance’s confusion was clear.

“I have been in love with the same person for the last seven years.”

“But you didn’t know Dani seven years ago.”

“I knew you.”
127. NSYNC
“Are you sure you really want to do this, Joey? This will change everything. How will Brianna and Kelly react to this? Your mom? The other guys?”

“Chris, we managed to make it through the end of NSYNC
and all the craziness that ensued. We can get through anything. Brianna will be OK. She’s old enough to understand. Kelly and my mom won’t be surprised. Neither will the guys.”

“What do you mean?”

“You were the only one who didn’t know how I felt about you. Everybody knows I love you. They’ve been after me for years to tell you.”
128. NSYNC
“Joey, I know.”

“Huh?”

“JC told me.”

“Told you what, Chris?”

“When he and I met last week, he told me that he had already heard me sing. He told me his friend Joey had a huge crush on me and made him come see me sing several times. When he was talking about his friend I didn’t know he meant you. He didn’t know we knew each other until last night at the club. Otherwise he never would have said anything.”

Joey was silent.

“Joey, why didn’t you say anything? I would have told you I liked you too.”
129. NSYNC
Justin pressed his body into the wall for support. He'd gone weak in the knees when Lance started whispering in his ear. The combination of Lance's voice, his hot breath on his skin, and the nip on his earlobe was too potent to resist.

Lance followed him, pressing his body into Justin's. He placed sharp little bites down Justin's neck to his shoulder. Justin whimpered when Lance sank his teeth into his shoulder, then licked his salty skin. Lance continued whispering into Justin's ear, driving him crazy with the spell he was weaving with his body and his deep voice.
130. NSYNC
You love Justin. You really do. Even though there are days when you wonder why. Days when he’s driving you nuts because he’s started believing his own press. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, you wonder why the hell you’re together.

On those days, you look at JC and wonder how different things would be. You’d been on the brink of something with him and you didn’t know why it hadn’t happened. You’d never managed to take that final step. And now there’s Justin. You love Justin. You really do. You just have to remind yourself some days.
131.BSB
AJ didn’t know what he was doing on the harbor. He hated the water because he always got seasick. The photographer had had the bright idea of taking their picture on the docked boat, which was definitely better than his original idea of having them go out on the ferry. He was sure that his loud complaints had affected the photographer’s decision.

The other guys had already finished and left. He was the only one still there. Or so he thought till he saw Howie walking up the beach.

“Hurry up, AJ. I found a great spot for a picnic.”
132. NSYNC
Justin was very vocal. He’d always been that way, for as long as JC had known him. He beat boxed constantly, harmonized with the songs on the radio, laughed at everything, and talked incessantly. JC had always assumed he’d be even more vocal during sex. But he wasn’t.

JC discovered that the opposite was true. At first, Justin would moan and sigh, but he’d get quieter and quieter. Justin would get so caught up in their passion that he would forget to make a sound. At the end, he’d stop breathing for a moment and then would moan so sweetly.
133. BSB
“Howie, you coming up to New York this weekend, right?” Howie was still half-asleep when he’d answered the phone, so he was confused for a minute.

“Nick?”

“Yeah. Are you still coming to New York?”

He paused for a minute to remember if it was this weekend he was going. “Yeah, I have a meeting Monday. I’m coming up on Saturday to do some sightseeing.”

“I need you to help me do something. Will you meet me at my hotel?”

“Will 10 work?”

“AM? Damn, Howie, that’s early.”

“I know, but it’s the time I’m coming in.”

“Yeah, yeah, okay.”
134. NSYNC
Justin and Lance decided that they can deal with their families’ reactions. Lance says that being away from all of you made him realize how much he loved you both and that he’d learn to deal with the fall-out. Not being able to see Lance taught Justin the same thing.

You’re the one who’s afraid now. You know you love them both and you want to be with them. But you keep thinking about your Dad. He was okay with Justin, but it took a while. You wonder how long it will take for him to be okay with this?
135. NSYNC
"I can't believe you actually thought that I wouldn't be here on opening night."

Joey smiled up at Chris sheepishly. "I should have known better."

"Just because I wasn't in the audience didn't mean I wasn't there. I was going to sit with your parents, but I got to stand in the wings instead. One of the perks of being the star's boyfriend."

"The only one?"

"Nope, definitely not the only one." Chris leaned down.

After being thoroughly kissed, Joey took a minute to respond. "I'm glad that you came. I needed you to be here for this."

"I know."
136. NSYNC
"I really, really want to."

"Lance, how long have you been wanting to do this?"

"My whole life."

"This is something that you've wanted to do for that long? What's holding you back?"

"Dunno."

"You afraid?"

"Maybe. What if I try and can't?"

"What if you can? You won't know unless you try."

"Maybe that's what I'm afraid of."

"The knowing?"

"Yeah."

"If you try and can't, you really won't lose anything. Only the dream. You'll find another. But if you can, you'll have been to space! Not many have."

"True. Thanks, Chris. I am going to go for it."
137. NSYNC
Lance tried to slip into the bed as quietly as he could, but JC murmured sleepily. "Hey."

"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you."

"And I didn't mean to go to sleep. I wanted to be awake when you got in."

Kissing JC softly, Lance whispered, "I'm glad you were asleep. I wanted to kiss you awake. It's been so long."

JC pressed himself closer to Lance. "It's been too long. I've missed you."

"Me too. The training was really hard, but it wasn't as hard as being without you."

"Come here. Let's make the most of this short time together."
138. BSB
Brian bumped AJ's shoulder lightly. "Hey. What's wrong? You're really quiet tonight."

"Just because I'm quiet doesn't mean something's wrong."

"How long have I known you?"

AJ gave him a look.

"Ok, maybe it's not been that long, but it's been long enough to know that if you're this quiet for this long, something's wrong."

"It's nothing."

Brian kept quiet.

So did AJ.

Softly, AJ said, "My Mom called. She got home okay and she'll be back next month. Everyone's all right. I just wish I could be there. I miss my family."

Brian drew AJ into a hug. "Me too."
139. NSYNC
"Mama, it's not JC's fault!"

"You're only 16!"

"But I've known I was gay since I was 12!"

"12?" Lynn sank down into the couch.

"Yeah." Justin moved closer to her. "I just didn't know how to tell you. I didn't know how you'd take it. See? You didn't take it well."

"Honey, it's just that I'm scared for you. I don't want anything to hurt you. And this will hurt you so much."

"No, it won't. Because he won't. He loves me."

"Enough to wait for you to grow up?"

"Yes."

Lynn sighed and pulled him close. "Okay, baby."
140. NSYNC/BSB
"Hey, I was calling to congratulate you on the album sales."

"Over 400,000 ain't so bad, huh?"

"Baby, it's great and you know it. You were worried for nothing. I told you it was good and that everyone was going to love it."

"Yeah, Lance, but you're my boyfriend. You're supposed to say stuff to make me feel better."

"And you know I do. But you know I also don't lie to you.

"Just everybody else?"

Laughing, Lance said, "You know me too well."

"Well, after 2 years, I'd better. I gotta go to an interview. Bye, babe."

"Bye, Nick."
141. NSYNC
“Mommy, Amanda has two mommies and everybody else has a mommy and a daddy or just a mommy. How come I have a mommy and 2 daddies?”

Kelly sat down and pulled Briahna into her lap.

“Honey, your Daddy and I have always been friends and we love each other. We just stopped being in love. Since we both wanted to be involved in your life, we bought a house together so you wouldn’t lose your family. When your Dad and Chris fell in love, he moved in too. So now you have a Mom, a Dad, and a Pop.”
142. NSYNC
“Pop, I asked Mom if I could borrow her car, but she needs it. Can I borrow yours?”

Chris looked at Briahna over his glasses.

“Where are you going? And with who?”

“Geez, Pop. I’m just going to the library. I have a project due on Friday. I’m going to work with my study group.”

“When will you be back?”

“In a couple of hours. Can I? Dad already said I could go.”

“Okay.”

Watching Briahna leave the kitchen, Joey laughed at Chris. “You are such a hard ass, man.”

“Someone has to be. You and Kelly are total pushovers.”
143. NSYNC
“She’s so beautiful! I can’t get over how big she is.”

“Joey, she’s 18. She’s been big for a while.”

“Shut up. You know what I mean. It doesn’t seem that long ago that she was just a baby. And now she’s going to the prom.”

“Yeah, with Christian.”

“He’s a nice kid. He didn’t turn out like his dad. Anyway, Sean’s mellowed out.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“It could always be worse.”

“How?”

“She could be going out with Jake.”

“Jake who?”

“Em’s son.”

“You shut up! Anyway, he’s a sophomore. You know she wouldn’t be going with someone younger.”
144. NSYNC
“What was that you said about Briahna not seeing someone younger?”

“You jinxed her, Joey!”

“What?! How?!”

“When you were talking about how it could worse, that she could be going out with Jake Mathers. Look what happened. She’s marrying him!”

“I did not jinx her.”

“They shouldn’t be getting married. He’s a kid!”

“He’s 23. He’s not a kid.”

“She’s only 25! She’s not old enough. She’s not ready.”

“I was 25 when we got together.”

“I’m not ready for her to get married.”

“Is that what this is about? I’m not ready either.”

“She’s really getting married.”

“Yep.”
145. NSYNC
“So will you do it?”

Chris was speechless and couldn’t answer.

“Pop? Pop?! Take a breath!”

Chris inhaled deeply, but still couldn’t speak.

“Come on, Pop. It can’t be that much of a surprise.”

Chris stuttered for a second then said, “It just never occurred to me.”

“I don’t know why not. You’re my Pop. Who else would I ask but you and Dad?”

“Bree, I don’t know what to say.”

“Just say you’ll make me the happiest girl in the world. Tell me you’ll walk me down the aisle with Dad.”

“Of course I will. You’re my honey girl.”
146. NSYNC
"So are you going to tell her?"

"What?! No."

"Why not? Britney's your friend, isn't she?"

"Justin. So are you, man."

"Sorry. Lance, I just don't know what the hell to do."

"You know that you have to tell her, don't you? It's not fair. What you and JC are doing to her is not fair."

"I know it's not. I don't know what to do. I don't want to hurt her. But I love him. I can't stop. I don't want to stop."

"It will hurt more if she found out about you two on her own."

"I know."
147. POPSLASH
{beep}

"It's Brit. Call me."

{beep}

"Me again. Call me."

{beep}

"Chrissy, why aren't you calling me?"

{beep}

"Ryan told you, didn't he? I told him not to! Jerk! It wasn't a big deal! He didn't have to tell!"

{beep}

"Come on, Chrissy. I'm sorry! Anyway, it was only one kiss! Justin kissed me! I didn't kiss him. Well, only a little. But I liked kissing you more!"

{beep}

"I got your message. Umm. You didn't tell me that you were going to the zoo with your Mom. Umm. That whole Justin thing? Can we just forget I said anything?"
148. POPSLASH
Britney wasn't sure if she liked Mandy's new hair. No, that wasn't right. She wasn't sure she liked the new Mandy that came with the new hair. She was more self-confident, more outgoing, more in control.

Mandy didn't ask for her opinion as often as she used to. She didn't show her the scripts that she'd read or the songs she'd written. She hadn't invited Britney to come to the studio to hear her record in over a month.

Mandy didn't need her any more and it scared her. She was afraid that Mandy had outgrown her and her love.
149. POPSLASH
Britney missed Christina with a bone-deep ache. She missed talking to her about everything and nothing. She missed holding her in the middle of the night. She even missed the jumble of cosmetics on the counter, the cause of many arguments. But what she missed most was knowing that someone loved her just as much as she loved them.

The hardest thing about not having her any more was not being able to tell anyone. No one knew they'd been together so no one knew they were apart. That's what hurt the most. It felt like Britney&Christina had never existed.
150. BSB
Brian knew he'd taken a risk by letting Nick go. He'd had no choice. He'd known that he was Nick’s first. His first everything. He had wanted to Nick to be sure that he was with Brian because he really wanted to be.

He'd hoped that Nick would come back to him, but had realized that he might not, that Nick would find someone new. He hadn't realized that he would be the one to meet someone new. He hadn't counted on LeighAnne. When he'd asked her out, he was looking for a friend and had found a wife instead.
151. BSB
You missed the taste of his kiss, the scent of his hair, the feel of his skin stroking against yours. You missed the rumble of his laughter against your back when you watched TV together. You missed the way he anchored you to the reality of your life.

You missed watching him talk to the others. That was when you saw a real expression on his face. Even though it hurt, you missed watching him when he was with Nick. He was the most real then. Since you'd chosen Sarah, you didn't see that expression directed at you any more.
152. BSB
You'd met him when he was so young. You knew he was the one you wanted so you decided to wait. You'd been waiting for so long, it had become an integral part of your life. You got so caught up in your grief for Caroline, trying to make her life matter more than her death, you didn't realize you were still waiting for him to grow up. You realized when you found him unconscious, trying to cope with his own grief about his grandmother.

You waited while he was in rehab. You didn't realize that Sarah was waiting too.
153. NSYNC
"Even the master plan of an evil genius has to fail sometimes."

"Don't make me laugh, JC. Can't you see I'm trying to wallow here?"

"Isn't your Momma always saying that it's good to not always get what you want? You need something to strive for."

"But why was this the one thing I couldn't get? It seems like I've been waiting to go to space for my entire life, dreaming since I was a kid."

"They didn't say you could never go. Just not this time. You will still get what you want. Like you always do, babe. "
154. BSB
"Howie, have you decided what you want for Christmas? Better yet, are you going to tell me what you want for Christmas?"

"Nick, you ask me this every year. You know that I'll love whatever you get for me."

"Yeah? Well, where are the seat covers I got you last year?"

"You mean the purple velvet ones?"

"Yeah."

"Well…"

"See? If you tell me what you want, you won't have to hide it under the blankets in the back of the closet."

"You know about that, huh? Nope. Still won't tell you."

"You just want to see me sweat."

"Yep."
155. NSYNC
"God, you are such an idiot." Lance arched up as Chris' weight pressed him down into the bed.

Chris gently bit the soft skin of his neck. "Hey."

Lance shivered and tilted his head to give Chris better access. "Well, you are. We could have been doing this for years. Years."

Chris licked at the skin, soothing the bite. "You know why we couldn't."

"You were being your usual anal self."

Lance gasped when Chris bit him again. "You know why."

"No, I don't."

"You were too young. If we'd done this then, we wouldn't still be doing this now."
156. NSYNC
Joey's laughing down at you and you have to get closer. You cup his face in your hands and lean in to place a kiss on his mouth. You can feel the tender skin of his cheeks on your fingertips and the prickle of his beard on your palms as you slide your mouth over his and gently bite his lower lip. He's still laughing as you pull away so you have to lean in again and taste his laughter.

He stops laughing and pulls you closer, moaning your name into your mouth. "Chris." It's never sounded sweeter to you.
157. NSYNC
Joey stumbled over the threshold. "JC, where are we going? Can I open my eyes now?"

JC guided him into the room. "No, not yet. In a minute. Ok, open them now."

Joey looked around at the recording studio, confused.

"You've been worried about Briahna missing you; I thought this would help."

"I don't understand."

"So you can record bedtime stories for her. Or songs. Or tell her stuff. Or anything else you want. Kelly can play the tapes for her when you can't call her to say good night."

Joey grinned and grabbed JC into a hug. "Thanks, man."
158. NSYNC
"Y'know she's only two years old, right?"

JC didn't look up from the clothing rack.

"JC? JC!"

JC jerked up from the rack. "Scare the hell out of me, why doncha? What!?"

"Briahna is only two years old."

JC, puzzled, stared at Joey. "Yeah. And?!"

"You're looking in the wrong place."

JC, still confused, continued staring.

"You're looking in the wrong section. This stuff is too big for her. It won't fit."

JC started laughing.

Joey was confused now. "Aren't we here to shop for Briahna?"

Giggling, JC held up his shopping bags. "We did. Now I'm looking for me."
159. NSYNC/BSB
"Y'know I don't like to cuddle, Nick." Chris rolled to sit on the edge of the bed.

Laughter rumbling in his chest, Nick tried to pull Chris down. "I'll pretend to believe that if you come back to bed."

With a put-upon sigh, Chris lay down beside him. “Alright, but only because you'll pout if I don't. Justin.”

Nick bit his shoulder. “Hey! No fair calling me names.”

Chris giggled. “I'll tell him you found that an insult.”

Nick nipped his ear. “You do and you'll be sleeping on the couch. No cuddling for you.”

Chris snuggled closer. “You win.”
160. NSYNC
Justin could feel the heat sinking into his skin, down into his bones. The cool whisper of breeze over his shoulders made him shiver. The nub of the towel felt slightly rough against his cheek. He stretched, digging his toes into the sand, completely relaxed for the first time in days.

The soft press of lips, rasp of bristles, and uneven tongue strokes against his nape made him tremble with pleasure. The cool drops of water falling from wet hair onto his back made him shudder with surprise. His protest turned into a moan at the scrape of teeth. "JC."
161. HARRY POTTER
“I was mad at him, y’know.” Placing a finger between the pages of her book before glancing up, Hermione looked at Ron.

“I was mad at Harry for being able to do something else that I couldn’t do,” Ron whispered.

“What are you talking about?”

“He could see them.” He could tell she was still confused. “But that was then. Before I knew that you had to see someone die before you could see them. The thestrals, I mean. I’m so sorry that I was mad at him for that. And so glad that I can’t see them.”

“Oh, Ron.”
162. BSB
Hot…wet…soft…These thoughts flutter through your mind as Nick kisses you. You love how his kisses make you feel. All your senses get caught up in him. Your breath catches when you see the hunger in his eyes as he gets closer. The soft licks across your palate, the taste of the coffee he’s had overlaying the flavor of his mouth, the soft whimper in the back of his throat when you gently bite his lip, the scent of his skin, combine to make you dizzy. The soft scrape of his cheek against yours makes you moan as he pulls away.
163. ANGEL: THE SERIES
He felt the soft whisk of the brush layering the woad upon his skin as Eve drew protective glyphs on his back. The incense burning in the room was making him dizzy. The dual sensations of silk sheets underneath him and cool air above him combined to make his skin tingle.

Eve grabbed a different brush to draw on his torso. He felt his sweat mixing with the dye, trickling down his chest. He worried that it would weaken the magic until he felt the power building around him as Eve began to chant the words to cast the spell.
164. NSYNC
{ring}

"Who is this?"

"Have you seen Superfly?"

"Joey, do you know what time… that stuffed butterfly that Chris gave Briahna?"

"Yeah. Have you seen it? Did we leave it when we were there?"

"I dunno. Maybe. Why?"

"Can you check?"

"Now?! It's three o'clock in the morning!"

"It's important!"

"Joey, it's the middle of the ni… Is that Briahna crying?"

"Yeah. She always goes to sleep with that damn thing and now she wants it. We can't get her to go to sleep again."

"I'll find it and bring it to you."

"Thanks, man."

"That's what godfathers are for."
165. NSYNC
“I know.”

Britney stopped brushing her hair and looked up from the mirror at Justin.

“I know. Wade told me.”

Britney blanched. She stuttered, “But he promised that he wouldn’t.”

Justin let out the breath that he had been holding and collapsed on the edge of the bed.

He stared at her for a minute, mute, a stricken look on his face.

His voice was a soft whisper. “He didn’t. It was a guess. I just thought…”

Britney threw the brush in her hand at Justin. “You tricked me, you jerk.”

Justin jumped up and yelled, “And you betrayed me!”
166. NSYNC
She'd fallen asleep in his arms. Joey could feel her slow breaths against his neck. He shifted her slightly, settling her weight more evenly on his chest. He stroked his hand down the back of her head, her silky hair trickling through his fingers.

Joey felt such a rush of love for her that he was overwhelmed by it. He hadn't expected to love her as much as he did. He'd known love all his life, but never like this. His love for her had changed his plans for his future. There was nothing more important to him than Briahna.
167. HARRY POTTER
Hermione put her things down on the table in the corner of the Astronomy Tower. She pulled out a quill, ink, and a blank scroll from her bag. She walked across to the windowsill.

She spent an hour studying the position of the stars to draw up a star chart for arithmancy class. Another hour went by as she drew up a rough draft. When she finished, Hermione continued to stare up at the night sky.

She watched as a star fell. She wasn't sure that it would work, but just in case, she made a wish.

She whispered, "Ron."
168. SG-1
{knock, knock}

"Danny. Come on. Let me in. I'm not going to go away, so you might as well let me in."

{knock, knock}

"You know I have a key. I could just let myself in."

When Jack didn't hear anything from inside the apartment, he decided to try the key. Daniel was already mad at him.

After several fruitless attempts at unlocking the door, he stared at it in disbelief. Daniel had changed the locks. Jack realized that Daniel was truly angry at him for lying.

"Y'know I was under orders."

Silence.

"Daniel, please."

The door slowly came open.
169. HIGHLANDER
"Brother, did you really think that it would be that easy to get rid of me?" whispered through the room.

Methos spun around from his desk, looking for Kronos.

"Brother, I am disappointed that you would think so little of me. After a thousand years together, did you not know me at all? Did you really think that I would stay with MacLeod?"

Methos desperately searched the dark corners of the room for the voice from his nightmares.

"Brother, I am always with you now. We will always be together, Methos."

Loud laughter echoed as Methos sank to his knees.
170. LORD OF THE RINGS
Eowyn had known that Aragorn's heart belonged to another, but she hadn't been able to stop hoping. Her uncle had always told her if she wanted something badly enough, she could get anything she wanted. Even after Aragorn had told her she loved a shadow, she had still hoped.

That hope died when she saw his face. She had seen that expression on his face before. She hadn't recognized it for what it was until she saw Aragorn look at Arwen the same way he looked at Legolas. If he already loved two, there was no room for a third.
171. THE SENTINEL
Sundays were his favorite days. After a long week of dealing with the buffoons at the academy, Blair needed the day he spent with Jim.

Simon did what he could to make sure that Jim had that day free, so they did what they could to enjoy it. They went camping, went to the gym, went to basketball games, or did nothing at all, just spent the day on the couch, talking. Those Sundays were his favorite.

It would be another three months before he graduated and was able to be Jim's partner again. Till then, he enjoyed their Sundays.
172. POPSLASH
"What the hell have you guys been doing? What were you thinking? Were you thinking at all?"

"But, Momma…"

"You know that you can not be Britney Spears and be married! Are you ready to give all this up? To give up the cars, the houses, everything that comes with this? Are you ready to throw it away? Are you ready to go back to Louisiana and be like all the other girls you grew up with?"

"But, Momma…"

"Don't but Momma me, Britney Jean. Are you ready?"

"No, Momma."

"We're going to annul this marriage today."

"Yes, Momma."
173. POPSLASH
She had known the moment that Jason had given in. His head bent down and his shoulders slumped. She'd been desperately hoping he could withstand the combined forces of her mother and her manager working in tandem.

They'd made so many plans. They had talked about going back to Louisiana, getting a house, having kids, and building a life together. He had made her believe it was possible. He'd convinced her they could make it if they stood together.

She whispered his name and he turned his face away from her.

Britney knew she shouldn't be disappointed. But she is.
174. CSI
Sara had been trying to figure out what to say to him. She had finally managed to get up the nerve to catch Grissom in the hall and stammer through the question.
She was astounded when she eventually realized that he had no idea what she was talking about. Grissom didn't know what she was talking about. Sara had never felt so uncomfortable in her life. She had to get away from him before he understood what she'd meant about it not interfering. She started to stutter an excuse, needing to get away from the dawning comprehension on his face.
175. THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT – ORIGINAL ENDING
You come to a standstill when you first see her. She is elegant, sophisticated, and so beautiful that you can't move. You're finally able to turn around and watch her as she walks away from you a second time.
You are so tempted to go to her, to see her engaging smile again, to touch her soft skin one more time. But you can't. You're on your way to meet your mom and Lenny for dinner. You're supposed to tell her about the two of you, though you think she probably knows by now. You turn around and keep walking.
176. WITHOUT A TRACE
Danny still wasn’t sure if he liked Martin’s new haircut. Martin’s hair had been one of the first things that had captured his attention. He had liked the silky feel of it sliding through his hands when he kissed Martin.

He did like how Martin was unable to try to hide behind it the way he used to, and how the strong line of his jaw and bright blue of his eyes were more noticeable now.

Danny decided he loved it when the gentle scrape of soft spikes across the pads of his fingers made him moan into Martin’s mouth.
177. KING ARTHUR
You hated the confidence in his voice when he told Arthur that you were going too, like there could not be a possibility that you wouldn’t follow. And you knew his certainty was that you would follow because of him and not Arthur.

He said it was because he believed that you would always be with him, that he could not imagine a time when you were not, so he didn’t. Sometimes you hated Gawain almost as much as you loved him.

You knew that you would always follow. Even when it meant that you would follow him into hell.
178. KING ARTHUR
When Arthur pulled her slender body to him for the kiss the priest requested, his arms still felt almost empty. After ten years of holding a much sturdier body in his embrace, it was a surprise to not feel a heavier weight against him, still a shock to see eyes a darker brown than he expected, to not feel the rasp of stubble against his lips.
The dark shadows in Guinevere’s eyes told him she knew this day would not have come if Lancelot was still at his side. He closed his eyes as he pressed his mouth to hers.
179. SG-1
Jack knew he was being petty when he ignored Daniel’s greeting to go to Skaara, knew but did it anyway. A part of him wanted to show Daniel how it felt to be ignored.

He’d known that something had been on the brink of starting between them on his first trip to Abydos. He was still a little miffed with Daniel for staying behind and not allowing them a chance to see where it would lead.

He’d had a year to think about it. He was over it. Mostly. But that didn’t mean he had to let Daniel know.

“Daniel.”
180. NSYNC
“Did someone call?”

“No, Briahna, just some jerk.”

“Dad, that was my boyfriend you hung up on!”

“You have a boyfriend? What do you mean? A boyfriend? You’re only 13!”

“I’m almost 14. You had a boyfriend when you were my age!”

“Yeah, but that was diff…”

“Joey, you’d better not say…”

“Chris, it is different. Tell her it’s different.”

“No way, leave me out of it.”

“Briahna, you’re too young to have a boyfriend.”

“Both you and Chris already had one when you were 13, even Mom had one!”

The loud slam of a door echoed through the house.
181. NSYNC/BSB
{ring}

{ring}

{ring}

“What?!”

“Hey.”

Nick cursed himself for not having looked at the caller id before answering.

“What do you want?”

“I just heard.”

“And?”

“I just wanted check to see how you were doing, to see if you were okay.”

“My girlfriend is running around talking trash about me to the whole world; how the hell you think…”

“Ex…”

“What?”

“Ex-girlfriend.”

Heavy sigh. “Yeah, ex.”

“Look, if you want to talk, I can come over…?”

“Yeah, because what I really want to do is talk about my ex-girlfriend with my ex-boyfriend.”

“Nick.”

“Lance.”

Silence.

“Yeah, okay, come over.”
182. NSYNC
Gasping with breathless giggles, Justin fell back onto the bed. “God, but I’ve missed this. Missed you.” Pressed a kiss against JC’s temple, slung an arm over Lance’s back and a leg over Joey’s thighs.

He glanced at Chris, standing by the bed. “Come on, man.”

Chris had an evil gleam in his eye.

“Uh-oh, watch…”

Before Justin finished speaking, Chris gave a whoop and landed on the pile of bodies on the bed.

Several breathless groans later…”Jerk, get off, you’re heavy.”

“You were just saying how much you missed this.”

“I did.”

They lay on the bed, quietly breathing.
183. Descendants of Darkness
Tsuzuki didn’t want to admit to being disappointed when Muraki accepted Hisoka’s challenge. Muraki had pressed him against the door, holding Tsuzuki captive with the heat of his body, he’d shivered, half in anticipation, half in terror. Muraki had tempted Tsuzuki for as long as he’d known him and now Tsuzuki finally had an excuse to not say no.

Tsuzuki definitely didn’t want to admit that he was hoping that Muraki would win, that he’d stared in disbelief when Hisoka placed his winning hand on the table. Disappointed, Tsuzuki had watched as Muraki conceded defeat without once looking at him.
184. NCIS
“Maybe it’s like falling in love. It can happen like that.” After a quick snap of his fingers, Tony walked back to his desk.

Speechless, Kate stared at him in annoyance. She knew she had not fallen in love with that terrorist, though he had been oddly fascinating.

She murmured, “Is that how it happened with Gibbs?”

Except for a slight tensing of his shoulders, Tony didn’t react, looking down at his paperwork.

Finally, he answered, “I don’t know what you mean, Kate.”

“Tony. Yes, you do.”

No response.

A more demanding “Tony.”

With a sigh, “Yeah. That’s how it happened.”
185. WITHOUT A TRACE Danny watched as Martin flinched when the loud thud of the door swinging shut reverberated through the ambulance. He heard as Martin bit back a soft groan, pressing a hand to his forehead, as if trying to keep his head from falling off his shoulders.

“You know you’re not supposed to go after a perp by yourself.”

Martin didn’t respond, closing his eyes against Danny’s sharp gaze.

“The most basic rule that all rookies know not to break and you did it anyway.”

No response.

“You’re an idiot.”

Silence.

“A cute idiot, but still an idiot.”

Martin’s eyes flew open.
186. SG-1
Jack doesn’t know how to connect with Daniel any more. He doesn’t know how he connected with him in the first place. All he knows is that he responded to Daniel’s unspoken need after his wife was taken. Jack had needed something to help him get through each day without thinking about Charlie, about Sara, about the way his life should be, and not the way it was. Helping Daniel deal with his loss had helped him deal with his own. Now that Daniel doesn’t remember anything about Jack, not even his name, let alone need him, he is lost.
187. NCIS
Gibbs knew he shouldn’t laugh, it would give the game away, but he couldn’t help it. The expression of disbelief on Kate’s face when he’d told her about Tony looking at her PDA had been priceless, only surpassed by the guilty expression on Tony’s face when he’d seen her wrathful look promising retribution.
Gibbs had known his lover would be in hot water as soon as he’d begun to speak, but decided that Tony needed to be reminded that Kate was only a friend, not anything more. Though only teasing, Tony had become too comfortable with Kate for his comfort.
188. SG-1
Jack knows Sam and Daniel don’t mean to exclude him from their conversation. They are so caught up in discussing the atmospheric conditions on PX3-659 they haven’t seen he’s edged farther away from the laptop on the desk.

He doesn’t think they’ve realized how often he’s pulled away from them lately. He’s been doing it since he recognized how close they’d become. He thought he’d been jealous of Daniel, because of Sam, until he’d finally noticed it wasn’t Sam he watched when they were together. When he realized Sam was the one he was jealous of, he’d pulled further away.
189. SG-1
“You dating the Colonel now?”

Daniel choked on his sip of coffee.

Janet reached to pound on his back as he coughed.

“Daniel. Breathe.”

Trying to escape from her, he waved her away, “I’m trying.”

Janet settled back with a smile, “Well?”

Daniel only fidgeted with his cup.

“I’m not asking. You’re not telling.”

Daniel took a slow sip of coffee.

“Would it help if I said I already know?”

Daniel choked on his coffee again, leaning away from Janet’s helpful thumps.

“Daniel, I’m your physician. I’m his too.”

When he realized what she was saying, he blushed bright red.
190. NCIS
Kate prided herself on being observant. She knew she was a good profiler. There wasn’t much that got by her. She sometimes made snap judgments so people managed to surprise her occasionally.

She’d already made up her mind about DiNozzo. He was a two-year-old masquerading as an adult, though he was a good NCIS agent. She’d assumed he was a new employee because she didn’t see how Gibbs could have tolerated him for long. She was surprised to learn they’d been working together for over two years. She was really surprised the day she realized they were more than that.
191. SMALLVILLE
Chloe misses hearing Lana talk on the phone, hearing that low, sultry laugh when Clark teased her. Lana had always sounded different when she talked on the phone with him late at night, like she hadn’t had to pretend because she was lying in her bed, talking in the dark, without anyone to hear her. Except Chloe.
But what she misses most of all is sharing a bathroom. Each time she thinks this, Chloe laughs at herself because she knows it’s true. Chloe misses walking into the bathroom with the scent of Lana’s bath oil lingering faintly in the steam.
192. NCIS
“Do you think they know?”

Abby stopped sifting Kate’s silky hair through her fingers.

When Kate noticed her lover’s stillness, she glanced over her shoulder.

Puzzled, Kate repeated her question.

Abby replied, “Does it matter if they do?”

Still confused, Kate responded, “Well, not really. I'm just wondering.”

Abby shifted away from Kate on the couch.

Without thought, Kate followed. She frowned when Abby shifted away again.

Finally realizing what Abby thought, she said, “I don’t mean about us. I already told Gibbs about us. I meant how they feel about each other.”

Abby’s incandescent smile was her only answer.
193. NCIS
Some days, Gibbs hides away in the basement, working on that "damn boat he’ll never finish, especially not in a land-locked basement." Bitter words spoken in anger by his ex only showed how much she didn’t understand. He uses the rhythmic movements, strain of his muscles, and susurration of sanding to drown out his thoughts on days that batter at the heart he pretends not to have.
He gets lost in the motion, thinking of nothing but the next action of his body. Until the rich scent of coffee drifts down the steps. He smiles and puts down the sandpaper.
194. NCIS
Kate fidgeted with her bouquet, watching as Abby walked towards her.

Abby had compromised between her family’s ideas and her own sense of style. She wore a beautifully-simple gown made of white satin, cut to flow smoothly over her body, without further ornamentation. It wasn’t needed. Her joyous expression made her breathtakingly lovely.

Kate felt a pang of regret. She knew she’d lost her chance. Abby had made it clear she liked Kate, but she’d never had the courage to reciprocate.

Abby smiled at her as she stopped at McGee’s side.

"We are gathered here to join this man and…"
195. NCIS
Tony feels the blood pumping through his veins, the shock of each foot hitting the asphalt travel through his body, the heat of the afternoon sun beating down on his shoulders. He feels the cool breeze blowing, trying to cool the sweat on his skin. He doesn’t hear anything other than his heartbeat thrumming in his ears.

He runs until any thought of guns, of knives, of blood-spattered car windows disappear from his mind. He doesn’t think about anything at all. Until he gets a sudden craving for coffee. He smiles as he thinks about where he can find some.
196. NCIS
She'd laughed when her sister teased her about him making a great first husband. She is not laughing now.

She stops herself nervously tapping her fingers on the smooth wood of the mahogany table. She angles her head forward to hide behind the fall of her auburn hair. The soft weight brushing her cheek brings back memories of her teasing him about loving her only for her hair. Looking across the vast distance between them now, she sees no trace of that man on his carefully blank face.

She scrawls her name across the document ending her marriage to Jethro.
197. NCIS/X-FILES
Tony was reaching for the light switch when an indefinable something caused the hair on the nape of his neck to prickle. Knowing he made an easy target, brightly lit by the hallway light behind him, he quickly stepped to his left, drawing his gun as he did.

“Who’s there?”

No sound broke the darkness. A darkness that was too complete. His living-room drapes had been closed. Only one person ever did that.

“Alex.”

A quiet rustling in the corner, then a raspy chuckle. A dark figure stepped into the block of light from the front door.

“Hello, little brother.”
198. NCIS
Abby knew Ducky was aware she wasn’t listening to his story, only enjoying the rumble of his chest vibrating against her cheek. She arched into the stroking hand smoothing down her back, slowly stretching. She settled against his side, placing her head on his shoulder again.

She loved the time they spent being quiet together. Abby smiled faintly, knowing she was the one being quiet. She loved listening to the cadence of his words, the softly accented lilt in his voice, the underlying tenderness of it. He talked so she could pretend to listen and take pleasure in simply being.
199. NSYNC
Justin feels his edges blurring, his sense of self becoming indistinct. The mask he hides behind is becoming more real the longer he wears it. Before, he’s been able to be himself, with his family, the guys, with JC.

He’s desperately trying to keep himself grounded in his version of reality, but now he’s feeling tetherless. He’s in a different country, surrounded by people don’t know him, can’t see him slipping farther away. They only see what he wants them to.

He urgently needs to reconnect with someone who can remind him he’s also a man, not just a celebrity.
200. BSB
AJ takes pleasure in the slow glide of the smooth bourbon over his tongue, relishing the taste of it, enjoying the harsh bite of the alcohol at the back of his throat. He licks his bottom lip, savoring the last drops. The tinkle of the ice as he places the glass of cola on the table top brings him back to himself.

The sensations from the imagined glass of alcohol are so vivid, he swears the taste of it still coats his mouth.

He panics and jumps up from his chair. He frantically paces around the house, trying to forget.
201. NCIS/X-FILES
Tony is in shock. He hasn’t seen nor heard from his brother in over two years. He’s started to wonder if he ever would again. He stands frozen by the front door for a moment before he rushes towards Alex. He’s in such a hurry he leaves the door open behind him.

The as yet unfamiliar hard press of plastic on the small of his back still disconcerts him when his brother pulls him into an embrace.

"Robin." The childhood nickname whispered against his neck makes him smile.

He says "Don’t call me that," and pulls his brother closer. "Batman."
202. NCIS/X-FILES
Gibbs was cursing the lack of available parking and the broken-down elevator when he noticed the front door was ajar to DiNozzo’s apartment. He pulled out his gun at the unusual sight. He walked stealthily to the open door and slowly peered into the apartment.

Gibbs was surprised when he found Dinozzo in an embrace with another man. Gibbs gasped in shock when he saw the look of contentment on his face. The expression on Tony’s face as he caressed the man’s cheek was extremely tender and full of love.

The quiet sound drew Tony’s attention to the doorway. "Boss!"
203. NCIS/X-FILES
Tony felt Alex tense against him. Knowing his brother’s usual reactions to the unexpected, Tony tightened his hold on him. Feeling the lessening of tension in the tall frame in his arms, he dropped his arms, stepping back.

He glanced toward the silent figure in his doorway. "Come in, Gibbs. I want you to meet Alex…" The slight press of Alex’s hand on his back caused him to stutter to a stop, pulling his attention back to Alex. A subtle shake of the head changed what he was going to say. "Krycek. A friend."

"Alex, this is Gibbs, my boss."
204. WEISS KREUZ
Omi had known that it had started as a game for Yohji and a way for Aya to punish himself. He’s not quite sure when it changed. He doesn’t think that either of them realized yet that it had moved beyond that. For both of them.

Though after tonight, they might have a clue. After Yohji had gone missing, Aya had been frantic to find him. When they’d found him, Aya hadn’t been able to resist kissing him. He hadn’t even waited to untie him before desperately grabbing him into a fervent kiss to which Yohji responded just as frantically.
205. NCIS
Gibbs knew Tony would eventually realize he was being played. Tony pretended to be a goof-off, but he was a good agent and usually didn’t miss anything. Except that his friend was playing him.

Gibbs wasn’t entirely sure how it started. Because Tony had made a pop-culture allusion that he hadn’t understood, Tony decided to educate him. He’d shown up at Gibbs’ with beer and DVDs. He did it each time Gibbs didn’t understand a pop-culture reference. So now there were many things Tony thought he didn’t get. Gibbs enjoyed their time together too much to ever let him know.
206. WEISS KREUZ
Brad had the glassy look to his face that indicated a vision. Schuldig watched him slowly shake it off.

His breath caught in surprise when Brad pulled the cigarette from Schuldig’s mouth and put it to his own. The pale, drawn features drew his attention from the plume of smoke snaking from his mouth to Brad’s face.

He had to ask. "What did you see?"

Brad was quiet for a moment, then said, "Success."

Schuldig was confused. Crawford was too upset. There had to be more to it than that.

A soft whisper, "Death."

An equally quiet response, "Whose?"

"Yours."
207. NCIS/X-FILES
Alex watched the man staring at him from the doorway, sizing him up, trying to read him. Alex returned the intent stare, curious about the man his brother worked for. Tony had just started with NCIS the last time he’d seen him and hadn’t had the opportunity to tell him much about it before Alex had had to leave.

The man’s direct gaze and erect posture bespoke an ex-military man. A good man, but tending to be inflexible, judgmental, reminding him of a certain AD.

His mouth curled into a sardonic grin. He would enjoy yanking this man’s chain too.
208. NCIS/X-FILES
Gibbs stiffened in response to the smirk on the stranger’s face. Tony noticed his tense posture and glanced over his shoulder to see what caused the reaction.

Tony probably thought he was being subtle when he stepped closer to his guest and jabbed his elbow into his torso. It did wipe the expression off the man’s face, which made Gibbs grin.

He stopped grinning when he saw the way the stranger looked at Tony. An open smile, full of warmth, lit up his face, making him seem younger, more approachable.

Gibbs frowned when Tony responded with an equally warm smile.
209. WITHOUT A TRACE
Martin can’t help the flinch of discomfort when Danny teases him about Sam. He hopes that Danny is too busy looking around for clues to notice it. His emotions are still too close to the surface to be teased by Danny, too many unresolved feelings for him to be able to handle the teasing the way Danny intends it.

He’d spent too many months watching the other man for any signs of reciprocated interest to be comfortable being teased by him about Sam. Though he’d finally given up on Danny, he doesn’t like being reminded of Danny’s lack of interest.
210. WITHOUT A TRACE Martin stared at Danny in exasperation, an expression of bewilderment and half-hearted anger clouding his features. Danny ignored him, too caught up in enjoying the sandwich he’d taken from Martin to notice. Martin shook his head in disbelief, then laughed; Danny’s look of confusion amusing him.

Danny’s total lack of awareness of Martin’s personal space always rekindled the flame of Martin’s hope whenever it flickered. He’d tried to convince himself Danny didn’t mean anything by it, to ignore it, but he couldn’t quite manage it.

Martin smiled in response to Danny’s grin as he felt the flicker gain life again.
211. SG-1
Daniel was two days away, recruiting in a neighboring village, when he heard about their capture. He rushed back, but was too late. He found them staked in the sand, an example of Ra’s might. Sam and Teal’c already dead, their bodies testament to their suffering.

Daniel dropped next to Jack’s still figure, desperately searching for signs of life. Whispering thanks as he discovered a faint pulse, he started to untie Jack.

Jack coughed weakly.

"Jack!"

"Leave."

"We will."

Still coughing, "Danny. I can’t."

Seeing the truth on Jack’s face, an agonized "No" was the only sound on the nightwind.
212. SG-1
It's been five years since they died and Daniel thinks of them every day. He sees Sam in the eager faces of the women he's teaching to read, Teal'c in the solemn gaze of the men planning the rebellion, and Jack in the frenetic motion of the children as they play.

He misses Sam and Teal'c constantly, but he aches with missing Jack. He still catches himself turning to share his thoughts with Jack.

The nights are hardest. With nothing distracting him, they're endless. He’s so lonely he can't sleep. He sits on the sand, staring at the stars, remembering.
213. SG-1
Daniel is bent over stoking the fire when he hears the achingly familiar voices. He almost falls into the flames in shock. He straightens and watches them walking by, his breath catching in his throat. Their appearance is so very different, but it is undeniably them: Jack, Sam, Teal’c.

Daniel’s knees give out on him and he sinks to the sand. He can not stop staring at them as they walk to the largest tent. He knows Katep is there and will be calling him soon.

Swiping at his stinging eyes, he quickly pulls up his hood and stands up.
214. SG-1
Daniel treats them the way he always has and is surprised when they don't react the way he expects them to. There is no sly glint of humor in Teal'c's eyes, no underlying self-assurance in Sam when she speaks to him, and worst of all, no real communication with Jack.

Sometimes, he forgets and says “Remember when…” or “You know…”, but he doesn't do it as often as he used to. It hurts too much to see the confusion on their faces or the brief flicker of discomfort at his knowledge of them.

He misses them more now than before.
215. WEISS KREUZ
Aya feels the snow melting on his skin, the cold press of metal from the mailbox against his temple, the hard concrete under his knees, the hot seep of blood between his fingers from his wound. He thinks he should get up, but he’s so tired.
He came to America to continue his solitary missions, to allow Aya-chan and Yohji to live their new lives. He has seen how happy they are with someone else.
It’s over now and he can finally rest. His limbs are getting heavy and his vision is getting dark.
Aya no longer feels the cold.
216. SG-1
Jack muttered "She knows," arching into the sting of teeth on his throat. When there was no response, he tried again, "Wier knows."

Nibbling down Jack’s chest, Daniel asked, "What does Elizabeth know?"

Jack sighed, "About us."

Daniel paused.

Jack continued, "I didn’t mean to tell her. I thought she was talking to me about you. I was distracted."

"You were distracted." Slow lick to a nipple, "You had just escaped death." A quick bite to the other, "Again."

Moving into Daniel’s mouth, Jack said, "And then I thought she asked me for you. She realized when I said no."
217. SGA
Mentally choosing his team from the people milling around him, Sheppard sipped champagne. Ford was his first choice. He was intelligent and had reacted well during the rescue. A little young and enthusiastic, but he would learn quickly.

Sheppard watched Teyla as she mingled. The respect on her people’s faces reinforced his decision to ask her.

He continued scanning the crowd, but didn’t immediately see anyone else he wanted to recruit. He needed someone smart and who wouldn’t panic under pressure.

Sheppard’s gaze kept returning to a blue Science uniform, wondering if Rodney’s intelligence was worth having to train him.
218. SGA
The cadence of his steps down the stairs matched the "Damn, damn," running through his mind as Sheppard raced towards McKay’s body. He hadn’t realized that his and Elizabeth’s teasing would push the scientist into doing something to prove his bravery.

Falling to his knees besides Rodney, he grabbed his wrist. The fluttering pulse reassured him as he watched Elizabeth remove the artifact from Rodney’s chest.

Calling for a medical team to the gate room, he sighed in relief as McKay started moving. Knowing that Rodney was going to be fine, he couldn’t resist teasing, "You must have passed out."
219. SGA
Pulling Stackhouse into an empty room, Markham said, "We have to talk."

Trying to step away from him, Stackhouse responded, "No, we don’t. There’s nothing to talk about!"

"Ever since the accident, you’ve been avoiding me!"

"Why would I do that? I don’t have a reason to hide from you!"

"You know things! You know me! Don’t you, Nick?"

Stopping his efforts to move back from Markham, he questioned, "Nick?"

"Tell me that ever since we spent that time in the wormhole together I haven’t been Adam!"

Stackhouse stopped resisting and allowed Markham to pull him close.

"Yes, alright? Yes!"
220. SGA
"Teyla. The time has come."

Hearing those words from Halling made her heart beat faster. She wasn’t ready. She’d known the time for her to journey away from her people to find her own way was coming for over a year, but she wasn’t ready for it now.

Indecisive, she stared at the resolve on Halling’s face.

Taking a deep breath, she stepped into an Athosian embrace with him. She took strength from her old lover.

"Go safely." She saw the faith in his eyes. And his love.

"And you."

Pulling away, she took the first step on her journey.
221. SUPERNATURAL
There are days when John only thinks of Mary a dozen times, the pain a low thrum in the back of his mind; others when her loss is a bone-deep ache, a primal scream caught in a knot of emotion in the back of his throat. Those days he’d give anything to hear her bright laughter, smell the scent of roses that clung to her, hold her in his arms as she dreamed, see her flutter her lashes and flash her dimples while she bent him as she wished, lose his breath in her kiss, anything just to touch her.
222. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Flipping through the pages in the chart, Burke said, "Mr. Duquette, I'm Doc..." stopping as he finally looked up. "John. But this says Duquette; this must not be your char..."

John interrupted, "Damn, I was hoping you wouldn't remember me."

Smiling wryly, Burke replied, "It has been over ten years, but it would be hard to forget the man who saved me from a succubus, wouldn't it?"

With a corresponding wry smile, John responded, "Yeah, I guess it would."

Burke stared at John appraisingly, trying to decide how to react.

"So you're having chest pains, Mr. Duquette?"

"Call me Denny."
223.SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Pressing a stethoscope to Denny's chest, Burke said, "Take a deep breath. I hate to tell you I told you so…"

Pulling away, Denny replied, "I know you did. And you know why I had to go."

"What I know is the trip to Kansas was hard on you, but this last trip to Chicago did you in. What I know is your boys don't know anything about this."

Denny turned away.

"Joh-Denny, they need to know, especially now. If you don't get a heart…"

"There's nothing they can do. So why call them? So they can say goodbye?"

"Yes."
224. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
"Denny, who’s Mary?"

After an almost imperceptible pause, he continued placing the tiles on the Scrabble board, barely glancing up after carefully counting his points. "Mary? I’m not sure I know what you mean."

"When you were coming out of surgery yesterday, you asked for her."

"Mary was my…" wife, no, not Denny’s, John’s, "someone I used to know a long time ago." A slight tightening of his eyes was his only visible reaction. "A really long time ago."

Izzy was puzzled at the distant look in Denny’s eyes, not understanding why, but knowing his reaction was to her question.
225. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Izzy admits that part of her attraction to Denny is his air of secrecy; the things that don’t add up about him pique her curiosity. He fascinates her because he seems open and honest, but deflects all her questions with a joke and a smile. She notices how aware of his surroundings Denny is at all times, constantly on alert, tensing at the slightest provocation, even under the influence of the narcotics managing his pain. She especially wants to know why sometimes he's slow to respond when she calls his name.

Izzy has never been able to resist a mystery.
226. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
A certain tilt of her head, the way her golden hair cascades down her back, how she flirts through her lashes when she smiles, the joy in her laughter, all of these things remind John of Mary, catching his breath in his throat, a pain in his heart that isn't physical.

Though Izzy is her own person. Her earthy sense of humor, the glimpses of temper that show in her green eyes, her common-sense attitude about life, (his Mary had been a dreamer), are uniquely hers.

His feelings for her remind him too much of Mary and this frightens him.
227. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Pressing his stethoscope to Denny's chest, Burke listened for a moment. "You going to tell her?"

Pretending to misunderstand, he said, "Who?"

Pulling away, Burke was silent.

"No, I'm not."

"John, you have to…"

"Denny. My name is Denny." Sighing, he continued, "What am I going to say? I've been lying to you. My name's not Denny, I'm ten years older than you think, I have two grown sons, my wife was killed by something I've been hunting for over 20 years, I think I could love you. I can't. I won't pull her out of her safe little world."
228. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Trying to draw in a much-needed breath, Denny stretched for the oxygen mask, hooked on the stand by his bed. He couldn't quite reach it. Gasping, he extended further, desperately trying to reach it, knowing he was running out of time.

Burke grabbed it, brusquely placing it over his face. "Joh-Denny, this is enough. You're turning blue. I'm calling your boys. They have to get here. Soon."

Inhaling deeply, Denny refused to respond.

"You're running out of time. Are you really going to deny them this? They're your sons. Let me call them."

A short nod was his only answer.
229. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Izzy stood in the doorway to Denny’s room, watching the two men stalking down the hall towards her. She’d heard the whispers about them; rumors spreading through the hospital like wildfire. They’d been holed up in Burke’s office earlier, involved in a shouting match with each other and with Burke. They’d slammed out of his office, nearly shattering the glass in the door.

No one knew anything about them, but knew enough to scurry out of their way. The strangers had an air of repressed anger, warning all to beware.

Izzy was surprised when they stopped in front of her.
230. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Izzy sees the visible effort the strangers make to camouflage themselves. They relax their body posture and smile at her, flashing their dimples. But she has seen them as they truly are, two very dangerous men.

She shivers as they seem to realize this, communicating with each other with a twist of a lip, a quirk of a brow, then turn back as one to face her. No longer smiling, they gaze at her silently.

Finally, the taller one says, "May we come in?"

Surprised, "You're here to see Denny?"

Something flickers on their faces before they both say, "Yes."
231. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Izzy hesitated momentarily, looking over her shoulder at Denny sleeping in his hospital bed, then stepped away from the door. The strangers walked into the room, the shorter one pulling the door closed behind them. They stood by Denny’s bedside, watching him sleep.

She saw Denny awaken with his usual speed, tensing when he saw the men before him. All three were frozen in a silent tableau until suddenly the taller man started yelling at Denny; the words too muffled through the door for her to understand. Izzy was reaching for the doorknob when Denny shook his head at her.
232. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Denny introduces the two men to Izzy as Sam and Dean, but doesn't explain exactly who they are. She is not able to ask Denny because he is never alone. Sam and Dean are a constant in his room, either one or both always there.

Dr. Burke makes sure to include them during Denny's exams. His tacit approval of them, as well as Denny's, assures their general acceptance by everyone. The other doctors and nurses become used to their continuous presence; no one questions it. No one but Izzy, her curiosity unsatisfied.

Their curiosity about her is just as unsatisfied.
233. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
They charm everyone in the hospital, Sam with his infectious grin, Dean with his bawdy sense of humor. No one seems to be aware of how watchful their eyes are above the smiles.

Izzy sees more than the smiles. She sees how conscious they are of their surroundings and everyone around them. She realizes they know she's watching and they're allowing her to see more, though, by no means, does she think she knows them.

Izzy's beginning to see that she also doesn't know Denny, that everything she thought she knew she assumed, that Denny had never actually told her.
234. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY Izzy notices they never call Denny by his first name, only an occasional "Sir." This makes her wonder if they served together, but that idea doesn't seem right. Both Sam and Dean appear too young, Sam more so than Dean.

Izzy notices they are always on alert, scrutinizing each visitor as they enter Denny's room, inspecting the window and bathroom unconsciously, ever vigilant. Sometimes she sees Dean reach for the small of his back and Sam shift to the balls of his feet when someone enters unexpectedly.

Izzy notices a lot of things, but is only more confused by them.
235. SPN RPF
When Jared holds him, Jensen can’t help falling into the position he falls asleep in each night, pressed to Jared’s side, his hand over Jared’s heart. Jensen’s agent has been after him to stop, but he can’t. He usually doesn’t realize he’s done it until photos show up on the internet and his agent calls, yelling at him. By then, it’s too late.

Rumors have already started which he laughs off. Jared thinks they’re funny so he won’t remind him to stop. Jared doesn’t mind the risk, thinks it’s time to stop hiding. Jensen’s afraid it will cost him Jared.
236. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Dean feels the penetrating stare through the plate of the glass as he bends down to place the oxygen mask over his father’s face. Tightening it slightly, he asks, "So who exactly is Izzy Stevens, Dad? And don’t tell me she’s just your doctor. No doctor is as dedicated as that. Nobody who watches you as much as she does is just anything. Check out the way she’s watching us right now."

They both glance up to look through the viewing window. Izzy realizes they’ve seen her, becomes flustered and pretends to look away, a dark rose staining her cheeks.
237. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
John’s reluctant to answer Dean’s question. Not because he’s embarrassed, but because he’s not sure what the answer is. He notices the set of Dean’s mouth and the determined glint in his eyes, realizing he won’t be able to not respond to his son. Dean has always been able to outstubborn his father.

Sam clears his throat softly, calling his father’s attention to him. John also sees the question on his face.

Taking a deep breath, "Sons..."

"Sons!" the exclamation from the open door preceded the crash of the chart falling out of Izzy’s hands, her face pale with shock.
238. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Izzy flew down the hall and into the stairs, everything a blur through the tears in her eyes. Gasping for breath, she dropped down on the step in the stairwell, her breathing bouncing off the walls. She curled down into her knees, pressing her face to the material of her scrubs, her tears soaking into the cloth.

She'd promised herself a long time ago that that no one would be able to hurt her the way her daughter's father had so many years before. But she'd really thought Denny had been different.

Muttering to herself, "Stupid, Izzy, you're so stupid."
239. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
John tried to climb out of the bed to follow Izzy; the devastation on her face hurting him more than he’d thought possible. Dean and Sam had to catch him as he lost his footing, too weak to stand. They gently helped him onto the hospital bed. He lay back, gasping for breath, as Sam adjusted the oxygen mask on his face.

The brothers exchanged a look across John’s bent head.

"Dad. Come on. Breathe. Calm down. We’ll find her. Sam will talk to her."

"I’ll talk to…?” Pausing for a minute to think, "Yeah, Dad, I’ll talk to her."
240. Izzy wasn't hard to find. Sam and Dean followed the startled reaction of the nurses down the hall and the muffled sobs into the stairwell. They saw her curled into an impossibly small figure on the first step of the landing.

They silently stepped closer, hearing her quietly muttering into her knees, "Stupid Izzy."

"You’re not."

Jumping up in surprise, Izzy lost her footing on the edge of the step. Only Dean's quick reaction kept her from tumbling down the stairs.

Letting go of her arm, stepping back, holding up his hands in a calming gesture, Dean said, "Sorry. Sorry."
241. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
With a quick swipe across a wet cheek and a deep breath, Izzy asked, "Not what?"

Sam stepped a little closer. "Izzy, you’re not stupid."

A quick scoff and another swipe at her cheek was her only answer.

With an earnest look, Sam responded, "Izzy, our Dad didn’t lie to you."

She wasn’t going to fall for any more lies. "So you’re Sam and Dean Duquette."

After a fleeting glance between the brothers, he said, "Well, maybe once or twice. Izzy, but only because he had to. There are some things that…"

"Quit calling me Izzy. You don’t know me."
242. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
Taking a quick step back, Sam said, "Dr. Stephens, I'm sorry. But, please, listen to me, this is important. Our dad may have told a lie - or two - , but only because he had to."

Izzy crossed her arms and didn't answer.

"There are reasons - good ones - we can't be as truthful as we would like to be. Please come back so you can talk to Dad. He'll tell you as much as he can."

"More lies?"

"Izz…Dr. Stephens, I'm not going to lie to you. Dad is probably not going to tell you everything. But no more lies."

243. SUPERNATURAL/GREY’S ANATOMY
All three heard the strident beep of the heart monitor as they stepped into the hallway. Izzy's gasped "Denny!" echoed behind them as they began to run towards the frenetic activity in Denny's room.

"Clear!"

She watched as Burke placed the paddles on Denny's chest and as his body arced up as the current flowed through him.

She started praying, fervently making promises that she would believe any explanation Denny gave her, as long as he was around to give her one.

She prayed even harder when the beep stuttered for a moment and then continued its shrill whine.

"Clear!"
244. NCIS
"Je-Director, I can't do this any more. She wants to buy a house. A house! That is just a little too real for me!"

Jen pulled off her glasses, carefully placing them on her desk.

"Tony, you knew what you were getting into when you took this assignment."

"Jen, I thought I did. I really did. But I like her. A lot. She's sweet, beautiful, she loves me, she's everything a man could want."

"She is also the daughter of the man responsible for supplying weapons to more armed terrorists than any other arms dealer in the last three decades."
245. NCIS
"Tony, I understand what you're going through. Believe me; I know how easy it is to get caught up in your assignment. But you have to understand how important this is. This is truly a matter of national security. I would not have asked this of you if it weren't. If I didn't think that you could do it."

Tony bent forward, dropping his head into his hands. Then, raking his fingers through his hair, he looked up.

"Jen, I don't know if I can keep doing this."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with Jethro? And a certain colonel?"
246. SPN RPF
Jared misses Sandy with a bone-deep ache. He misses the mischief in her smile, the feel of her hand in his, the joy in her laughter as he sweeps her off her feet, the scent of her soft skin, the glide of her hair over his body, the sting of her teeth on his hip, the slight weight of her as she lies on him, the tenderness in her eyes when she presses her mouth to his, her moans when he pushes into her. But, most of all, he misses the way she makes him feel when he’s with her.
247. SGA
John and Rodney don’t talk about it. They don’t because they both know. A slow drag of a thumb along a palm, a quick bump of shoulders, a slightly too long look across the conference table, a joke no one else understands.

But they also know nothing will come of it. Not right now. Atlantis is too important to them. They both want to stay too much to ever risk getting caught. So they take what they can get: movie nights, walks on the east pier, chess. And when they want more, they know they have to wait. For now.
248. SUPERNATURAL
Dean still misses Sam. He is always turning to talk over his shoulder to Sam, to make a joke about the guys playing pool in the corner, to point out the pretty waitress, to ask him to pass the ketchup. But Sam’s not there. He hasn’t been for almost two years.

Sam is away at Stanford, trying to live a normal life. Dean’s not sure exactly what that means. All he understands is that Sam is in California and not with Dean. Sometimes he hopes Sam finds what he’s looking for. Other times, all he wants is his brother back.
249. SGA
“Turn off that TV and come to bed! It’s the middle of the night!”

“Sheppard, the election is tomorrow! How can you be so calm? If he wins, we have to tell McCain about the Stargate, about Atlantis. Have to tell him about the Ancients. Have to tell him about the Chair! Oh my God. There are so many things that can be used as a weapon.”

“Calm down, Rodney, he’s not going to win.”

“I know you’ve already voted for Obama. But there are so many other morons out there! How can you not be worried?”

“I have hope.”
250. SG-1
Daniel’s not sure about the new guy. He seems an okay kind of guy, a little impetuous, maybe even reckless, but overall, a good guy. Not Jack though. There is only one Jack. Sam is willing to give Cameron a chance. So is Teal’c.

There is just something about him; something that gets under Daniel’s skin. Every time Cameron speaks to him, every time he flashes a grin at him, every time he calls him “Jackson”, Daniel wants to… He’s not sure what exactly. All Daniel knows is he wants to do something. He wishes he knew what that was.
251. TERMINATOR: SARAH CONNOR CHRONICLES
Sarah looks at Charlie and doesn't see Kyle. That's what she loves about him. That she sees him clearly, without a shadow of Kyle standing behind him. It's why she has to leave when he asks her to marry him. She loves him too much to stay and put him in danger.

She didn’t expect to fall in love with him. Charlie was supposed to be someone John could hang out with, learn first-aid from, not be someone important to her. She simply needed human contact for a while, someone to hold her when she woke from her frequent nightmares.
252. SPN RPG
“Are you happy now he’s only yours?”

Jensen fumbled, trying to hold onto his newspaper. “Sandy? Hey. What are you talking about?”

“Don’t try to pretend. You wanted Jared for years. Are you happy now he’s only yours?”

“I don’t know what you think you know. But Jared and I… we’re not together. Not yet. We just started exploring the possibility.”

Confusion on her face, Sandy stuttered, “B-but I thought… You weren’t together before? But you live together!”

“Yeah, now. Then he was in love with you. Nothing would have happened. After you left him…”

Tears started filling her eyes.
253. ONE TREE HILL
Peyton loves being around Brooke; she’s her best friend. But there are days where she needs to be away from her, days when seeing how happy Brooke and Lucas are together is particularly painful and she has to get away.

She hops in her car, turns up the music, and just drives. The sun on her face, the wind in her hair, the music pounding in her ears help her forget; let her make believe there are no tears on her cheeks.

When her heart isn’t on the point of breaking any more is when she comes back to Brooke.
254. EUREKA
Jack sees Allison, talks with her, touches her every day, but it’s not the same. It’s excruciating to not put his arm around her, to feel her so close and not be able to pull her even closer. He remembers nights in bed smoothing lotion into the taut skin of her belly, feeling the baby kick, but she doesn’t. She is not his wife and, now, never has been. Nor will be.

He sees her falling in love with Nathan again, the tenderness in her eyes when she looks at the other man, the closeness of the three of them.
255. LOST
Jack said “I thought that you and Kate, once we got off the island, would end up together.”

Stirring his drink with a pinky, Sawyer laughed. “Nah, Freckles and me, we’re way too much alike. We’d drive each other crazy in a week. Last I heard, she was in Montana, trying out one of the dude ranches.”

A faint smile on his face, Jack took a sip of his bourbon.

“I thought that you would end up with Freckles, with the white picket fence, the whole nine yards.”

“No, we were too different. She’d drive me crazy in a week.”
256. NUMB3RS
Colby is so damn tired. He wants just one day without having to second-guess every word he says, without having to consider every thought, every action. A day without wondering what stories he’s told and who he told them to.

Those are the days he hides from everyone, but especially from David. Those days he wants to tell someone, wants to tell David, about all the lies he’s told, the lies he’s still telling. He wants to tell the truth, about his life, his family, his work. But they are not his secrets to tell. Not yet; maybe not ever.
257. SGA
Smoothing down his silk tie, Rodney turned to face John.

“Do you think this is too much?”

John stopped gargling mouthwash for a moment to raise an inquiring eyebrow.

“For my meeting today.”

Straightening up from the sink, John asked, “Rodney, what meeting is so important you’re wearing a monkey suit?”

Rodney was bouncing up and down on his toes in excitement. “I’m meeting with President-elect Obama today. He got his first security briefing a few days ago. Now he finds out about the Stargate. And about Atlantis. I get to tell him.”

“You need someone to help you, right?”
258. NCIS
“Why didn’t you want me to go?”

Gibbs heard the casual way Tony spoke and paused in the forward motion over the wooden rib of the boat.

Taking a measured breath, he turned around to put down the sandpaper in his hand.

“I’m sure Ziva and McGee told you about Jackson before you came down. They also told you how I act around him. Don’t get me wrong. I love my dad. But he drives me crazy. I get caught up in being his son, start behaving like a teenager again. I didn’t want you to see me like that.”
259. GHOST WHISPERER
The first time Melinda tells him about her gift, Jim is tempted to not believe her. The shadows in her eyes, the tension in her shoulders tell him that is what she is expecting. She’s telling him she sees ghosts, talks to ghosts. Doesn’t she understand how crazy that sounds? How can he believe her?

But he’s known her for four years, has been in love with her for over half that time, wants to spend the rest of his life with her.

Cradling her face in his hands, he presses a kiss to her soft lips. “I believe you.”
260. X-FILES
Scully's jealous. She’ll never acknowledge it to Mulder, but she will to herself. She’s been harboring a slight hope that maybe someday she and Mulder might have a romantic relationship.

She observes the way Mulder’s leaning into Krycek, completely focusing on the other man. There’s a slight pout on his mouth because Krycek hasn’t laughed at his witticisms. She notices Krycek deliberately not responding to Mulder’s awkward flirting, other than with a slow downward sweep of his lashes to mask the laughter in his eyes.

She sees that Krycek’s refusal to react to his jokes has Mulder trying even harder.
261. SPN RPF
The utter stillness of their surroundings makes Jensen think they lost power to last night’s snow storm. He’s glad of the fireplace in their bedroom, though he’s not getting up to light the fire. He’s content to sink back into the warm softness of flannel sheets and down comforters.

He snuggles back into the bare skin of Jared’s chest, willing to drift back into sleep. The leisurely drag of sharp teeth across his nape lets him know Jared is awake. Jensen tilts his head, allowing Jared more access.

Jensen reckons Jared has a better plan for their morning in bed.
262. SG-1
“He doesn’t get it.”

Cameron questioned, “Sir?”

“Daniel doesn’t understand exactly what’s going on. He likes to think he knows everything, but he doesn’t know this. He went from being a sheltered academic to a married man in an instant. He didn’t get the chance to figure out how to play the games.”

Choking on his beer, Cam stuttered, “Games?”

“No games.”

“Sir, I don’t know what…”

Jack interrupted, “No games, Mitchell.”

“General, I…”

“Jack.”

After a pause, “Jack, I’m not playing games. I like him. I think he likes me. I’d like to see where this goes. No games.”
263. DUE SOUTH
Kowalski loved going on stakeouts with Fraser. He could do without the long hours and the endless waiting, but the best part about the stakeouts was talking with Fraser. There were no distractions: no Lieutenant barking orders, no Frannie trying to get Fraser’s attention, no one trying to shoot them.

Just him and Fraser drinking the bitter tea Fraser always brought and eating the donuts Ray always brought. Talking about everything and about nothing. It was the only time that he could be as honest as he wanted. The darkness gave Ray the courage to speak freely. So he did.
264. STARSKY & HUTCH
Starsky bites into a fish taco with such relish that Hutch can’t help but laugh. The sun beating down on them and the cool breeze playing through their hair adds to his sense of absolute contentment.

For the last six months, Hutch has been so afraid Gunther would succeed in taking Starsky away, the infections and hard rehabilitation completing the job started by the bullets in his chest.

Seeing Starsky now, the laughter sparkling in his eyes and the smile on his face, is so much better than seeing him through a glass window, unable to breathe on his own.
265. STARSKY & HUTCH
Starsky shuts his textbook with a sharp snap. Running his fingers through his hair in frustration, he lays his head down on the table. After a few moments of wondering what the hell he was thinking when he decided to go back to school to become a physical therapist instead of trying to become a cop again, he opens up his book.

A soft squeeze of his shoulder brings his head up once more.

“Hey, babe.”

“Problems?”

“Some. I’m studying for a test tomorrow and I’m having trouble keeping the muscle groups straight.”

“Want some help studying?”

“Sure. Thanks, Blondie.”
266. STARSKY & HUTCH
After a hurried shuffle of the index cards in his hands, Hutch looked up and asked, “What do the brachialis and brachioradialis do?”

Scrubbing his hands across his face, Starsky sighed in exasperation. “I’m tired. Why don’t we go out to dinner or something?”

“Come on. You know the answer to this.”

“I’m hungry, Blintz.”

“When we’re done, we’ll go out to dinner. Then come home for dessert.”

With a smirk, Starksy laughingly asked, “Home for dessert, huh? Okay. Brachioradialis flexes the forearm at the elbow and brachialis is a muscle in the upper arm that flexes the elbow joint.”
267. NCIS
Kate is aware they can’t see her any more. Nevertheless, she likes to pop in every now and then to see how they are doing. She wants to make sure they’re still doing okay. They hadn’t handled her death well, especially Tony and Gibbs. They had been with her when she’d died, had blamed themselves for not saving her.

She likes to see how good Tony and Gibbs are doing now, smiling at each other, at the new girl. She likes Ziva, likes how she seems to fit in effortlessly, though she does wish they hadn’t forgotten her so completely.
268. NUMB3RS
“I am so pissed at you, man.”

David closed his eyes and sighed.

“Colby, I know you’re mad at me, but what else was I supposed to do? That little boy was going to die. So was Mr. Knight. I couldn’t just sit there and wait. I couldn’t.”

“Charlie’s robots…”

“There weren’t any left.”

“David, you have to be careful. You can’t…”

“The way that you’re careful? I’m not the only one who can’t wait. You were the one climbing down that bridge…”

“That’s different.”

“How is that different? Because it’s you?”

“I get it. How about we’re both careful?”
269. GHOST WHISPERER
She fascinates him and he does not understand why. Melinda told him that he was working for her before his accident, but Sam doesn’t understand why he feels like he knows her. He’s certain if he runs his fingers down her side that she’ll giggle until she loses her breath. Her laughter is familiar, making him want to laugh with her. The sparkle in her eyes invites him to share in her joy.
She says she never cheated on her husband so she has never been Sam’s lover. Since he’s never touched her, how can he know how she’ll react?
270. GHOST WHISPER
Melinda sometimes doubts that Sam is Jim. When she looks at him, all she sees is his blonde hair, a youthful face, and eyes a different shade of blue. He eats different foods and doesn’t like his coffee black.

But, other times, the way he moves, the way he holds his coffee cup, the jokes he tells her, how he runs his hands through his hair, all these things remind her so vividly, tears spring to her eyes.

When he asks her what’s wrong, she doesn’t know how to answer. He won’t believe her if she tells him the truth.
271. DUE SOUTH
Ray Vecchio wants to go home. He wants to see his mother. He even wants to see Frannie. He, above all, wants to see Benny. Benny knows most of his secrets and understands them all.

He wants to be able to talk to someone without having to pretend he’s a cold-blooded killer, afraid of nothing and no one. He wants to wash off the darkness staining his soul. Too many people depending on him to take down the Mob have pressured him into doing things he thought he would never do. He knows better now.

He wants to go home.
272. SPN RPF
Jensen has been freaking out for the last week. It’s the first Thanksgiving he and Jared will have at their new house. It’s also the first Thanksgiving that both his parents and Jared’s will be having at their house.

They’ve had both families over before, but this is the first occasion they’ll be together when everyone else knows he and Jared are a couple.

He’s spent the last two days with butterflies in his stomach, trying to get together the ingredients for the dinner he’s making. All Jared has been able to do is laugh at him the entire time.
273. THE CLOSER
He loves her even when she drives him crazy. Fritz has never met anyone quite like Brenda. He doesn’t think there is anyone quite like Brenda. She’s such a unique mixture of strong woman and insecure child. She is always full of surprises.

This last surprise has truly knocked him for a loop. He has dreamed of a little girl with pigtails, of a little boy with a gap-toothed grin. Having to choose between a longed-for child and the woman he loves isn’t something he thought he would have to do. He isn’t sure it is something he can do.
274. FRINGE
Charlie’s been watching her for years. He watched her go from an extremely focused agent, intent only on the job to a woman in love, easily distracted by her lover. Charlie had hoped to be the one who helped Olivia break out of her shell, to be the man she loved, but that hadn’t happened. John Scott had been the one who had succeeded.

Charlie had never liked him, thought him too slick and too self-involved to be a good match for her. Olivia had, though, so he’d given John the benefit of the doubt. Now he wishes he hadn’t.
275. FRINGE
Astrid thinks they are all crazy, not just Dr. Bishop. Dr. Bishop’s craziness is easily seen by everyone, while his son is more able to hide his as quirks. If someone pays attention the way she does, you can see in Peter’s eyes that his hold on his sanity is more tenuous on some days.

Agent Dunham walks a fine line. Astrid saw the havoc the death of her boyfriend caused in her life. She's obsessed with finding the answers as to why he betrayed her and their country. Even Charlie Francis seems to have issues, all revolving around Olivia.
276. SG-1
Picking up an envelope from the table, Daniel asked, “What’s this?”

Swallowing his coffee, Cam replied, “Airplane tickets.”

Daniel stopped tearing open the envelope. “Going somewhere?”

“There are two tickets.” Cam took another sip of coffee.

“Where we going?”

“DC.”

Daniel carefully set the envelope down on the table.

“Don’t want to go to DC. There’s no reason for us to go to DC.”

Fleeting look of pain on his face, Cam replied, “I won’t go then.”

“That’s not what I meant. I don’t want to go either.”

“You miss Jack. Go see him.”

“No. We will go see him.”
277. GENERATION KILL
Brad tilts Nate’s hand in his, cataloging the changes in the low light of the lamp: the softening of his fingertips, the broken open calluses on his palm, the no longer cracked skin between his long fingers, the smooth, even lines of his clean nails. He runs the tip of his finger across Nate’s palm, a barely there touch, slowly dragging his nail along the nearly invisible scar at the base of Nate’s thumb.

Seeing the changes so starkly in Nate’s hands, Brad can’t help but wonder what else has changed since Nate left the Corps, since Nate left him.
278. GENERATION KILL
“Are you still coming?"

"Nate…"

"Stop giving me bullshit excuses, Brad. This is the 3rd time you’ve canceled your trip out here. Man the fuck up. If you don’t want to come, fucking say so and stop pussyfooting around."

"Sir…"

"Do not even start that shit with me. I’m not your LT any more. If you don’t want to come, you don’t fucking have to. You only have to say it. Do you want to come see me this weekend, Brad?"

"Yes."

"Then what the hell?"

"Nate, I don’t want to be in the way."

"You’re an idiot."

"Yes, sir."
279. GENERATION KILL
"Can you really say you didn't know, that this is a total surprise?"

"No. I've known for a while. I just didn't expect to finally hear it from Casey Kasem instead of you."

"For that, I am sorry. I should have told you myself. I couldn't find the right words to actually say it, not to you."

"To me, sir?"

"It's Nate now."

"Nate."

"I didn't know how to say that I was quitting; I couldn't take it any more, that I just couldn't stand by and keep doing nothing."

"Si...Nate, you know there wasn't really anything you could do?"
280. GENERATION KILL
Wright doesn't believe the President's claims of Iraq's involvement with 9/11. He's not sure he believes that Iraq has WMDs. He's not even sure that Iraq is better off now the U. S. has supposedly come to free its people.

All he is sure of is that he trusts the Marines he travels with. Wright can honestly say he knows no other men like them. They come from all walks of life, from different parts of the country, with nothing really in common other than being a Marine. But that's everything. These men are brothers. And he believes in them.
281. GENERATION KILL
"Amor, how are you? La reyna?"

"Querido, everything's ok. Everyone esta bien. Your papa was diagnosed with la azucar. He's mad at your mama because she won't make him tortillas now and she hides the pan dulce. La reyna is still ruling everyone with an iron fist and a flutter of her lashes. Don't worry so much."

"I can't help it. I want to be there with you to help you with her, to help mis papas."

"Tony, me too, but we're doing ok. I can't wait to see you though. Do you know when you're coming home?"

"Not yet."
282. GENERATION KILL
Lilia was good at being a single mother. She lived with her daughter in Los Angeles, had a great job, and good friends. She missed her husband, but it had gotten easier.

When Tony first became a repo man and spent a lot of nights traveling, it had been difficult, particularly after the baby was born. When he'd joined the Marines and deployed overseas, it became harder.

She'd thought of going back to Texas to be with her parents, but stayed to be near Tony's family. And she'd wanted to be close to the base for when Tony came home.
283. GENERATION KILL
They all call her Mrs. Gunny, no matter how many times she’s asked them to call her Cara. They come to talk to Mike, these men with the young faces and old eyes. They sit on the porch, drinking beer with her husband.

She often hears low voices, loud laughter, with long stretches of silence. She’s even heard a couple of them sing. She invites them to supper and sometimes they’ll stay. They’re always charming, telling her tall tales of Mike on deployment, and laughing at her stories of Mike as a younger man. She likes it when they visit.
284. GK/SG-1
Sam came to talk to Fick and Colbert, but stayed to see Person in action. He seems to have a way with communication equipment that could be useful to the SGC.

Everyone treats her like an Air Force officer. It’s nothing she’s not gone through before. Part of it is that she’s a woman – a small part of it - but most of their attitude is because she’s Air Force. And an officer. She’s been around Marines long enough to know it’s not personal. All officers are POGs until they’re proven otherwise.

They’ll soon learn she’s not what they’re expecting.
285. GENERATION KILL
"Too bad that you couldn't see"

"Damn, could you sing something other than Avril Lavigne?"

"You're watching your back like you can't relax"

"Ray."

"I thought that you'd be here by now"

"Ray!"

"My loneliness is killing me"

"Not Britney either."

"Baby I remember the way you used to look at me and say"

"Not NSYNC."

"Every little thing I do never seems enough for you"

"Hey, that's still NSYNC!"

"I don't care who you are"

"And now Backstreet Boys?"

"Walt, how exactly do you know who they all are?"

"My little sister was a fan."

"Your little sister. Riiiight."
286. GENERATION KILL
"My toe hurts."

With a confused look on his face, Nate asked "Your toe hurts?"

"Yeah, the middle one on my right foot."

"You don't say anything when your ankle hurts."

"I broke it climbing."

"Your right knee."

"I wrenched it surfing."

"Your left shoulder."

"I dislocated it during Afghanistan."

"But you mention your big toe?"

"Well, it hurts."

After a moment of silence, he repeated, "your toe hurts."

Nate put down the newspaper he'd been reading and looked at Brad.

A slight smile curling his mouth, Nate said, "You're only thirty-five, Brad. You're not getting old. Not yet anyway."
287. GENERATION KILL
Jane was happy Brad Colbert was visiting them before shipping out on his next assignment. She’s overjoyed, though Niel told her to not get her hopes up, but she can’t help it. They finally get to meet the man Nate’s been talking about for almost a year. Every letter, every call, there’d always been something about Brad.

Nate’s been home over three months, wandering from Maureen’s couch, to Stephanie’s, to theirs and back again, adrift. The only time he’s fully engaged is when talking to or about Brad.

Jane wants to meet the man her son is in love with.
288. GENERATION KILL
Brad jerked himself awake, his choked off gasp echoing in the dark bedroom. He swung his legs over the side of the bed, sitting up. Letting out a slow breath, he scrubbed his hands across his face. When his heart had stopped racing, he walked to his bathroom to throw some water on his face. Brad stared into the mirror, water dripping down his pale cheeks.

He hated that damn nightmare. It had been hard enough living through the reality, but the nightmare was much worse. Captain Morel’s red hair replaced by Nate’s brown, lifeless green eyes instead of blue.
289. GENERATION KILL
Nate’s entire life is compartmentalized. He shows a certain side to his family, the face of the brother and the son they still expect him to be, like he hasn’t changed in the years he’s been away, the war he’s fought not having affected him somehow.

To his professors and classmates, he’s the A student, organized and studious. His men – they will always be his men, no matter who they report to now – still see him as their LT.

Only Brad really sees him, sees all the different masks he hides behind. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t hide from Brad.
290. GENERATION KILL
Pappy loves the Corps. He’s been in for a long time and loves being a Marine. He loves his men, even when they act like whiskey-tango fuckups that don’t know their ass from a hole in the ground. The majority of his commanding officers were good men, although there've been a few he wouldn't have minded saluting on the battlefield.

There are days when he misses North Carolina something fierce. What he misses most are afternoons on the back-porch with his cousins, drinking beer, the taste of his Momma's tangy coleslaw and his Daddy’s smoky barbecue still in his mouth.
291. GENERATION KILL
Brad felt sharp pricks on his ankle and instinctively pulled his foot onto the couch. Looking down, he saw a scrap of black fur with big eyes staring up at him.

Reaching down, he picked up the tiny Chihuahua puppy, cradling it in his hands.

“I see you’ve met Harry.”

“Harry? You name him after someone? Anyone I know?”

A tinge of color on his cheeks, Nate smoothed a finger down a squiggly patch of white fur on its forehead.

“Not exactly.”

Brad studied Nate’s face and then the puppy’s.

Laughter in his voice, “You named him after Harry Potter?”
292. SG-1
Cameron hid himself away for a few years, trying to heal from wounds, both physical and emotional. He hadn’t just lost his team, lost Daniel, he’d lost his whole world.

Life in the 1920s was a major culture shock. Everything was different. It was like a foreign country with none of the amenities he was used to. It took a while to gain his feet. When he decided he had to actually live this life, he traveled the world to see as much of it as he could before he had to figure out how to get on that freighter.
293. SG-1
Cameron’s been debating for almost 10 years about writing this letter. He’s gone back and forth between yes and no. The Sam voice in his head keeps telling him it’s too risky, the possibilities for changing something important too high. He’s really afraid of that.

But he’s more afraid of the future not happening the way it’s supposed to. He’s lived a good life. He’s had a few relationships, though never anything permanent, too leery of accidentally giving something away. But it’s not the life he should have had. A life with Daniel.

He put pen to paper: Dear Daniel

294. SG-1/THE GOOD WIFE
“Are you Daniel Jackson?”

“Who’s asking?”

“My name is Will Gardner. I’m with Stern, Lockhart & Gardner in Chicago. I have some documents for you, sir.”

“What kind of documents?”

“I’m not really sure. My firm has had these documents since 1939. My grandfather handled the matter initially. All we know is we were supposed to deliver these to Daniel Jackson on May 1, 2008. My grandfather passed away some years ago so we can’t really ask him.”

“Who are they from?”

“A Mr. Cameron Mitchell.”

“Cam? And you’ve had them for that long?”

“Yes.”

“Then yes, I’m Daniel Jackson.”
295. SG-1
When Daniel slit open the envelope, several photos fell onto the table. He picked up a picture of Cameron standing next to Gandhi. Surprised, he picked up another, this one of Cam standing beside a 1930s airplane. Putting it down, he saw one with Cam with his arm around Amelia Earhart.

He spread all of the photos on the table. They were black-and-white images of Cam, dressed in old-fashioned clothes, gradually getting older. Sitting down in shock, Daniel picked up the documents.

Dear Daniel,
I hope the future hasn’t changed to the point that you don’t know who I am.
296. SG-1
Carefully placing the documents in the exact center of the desk, Major Davis straightened up. “Daniel, I got you what you asked for. Will you tell me now why you wanted me to get information regarding C. S. Mitchell from the British government? Why so interested in an American lost in the Battle of Britain during WWII?”

“Sorry, Paul, I don’t think I can. I had to verify what I already knew. I needed to have it as proof for when I tell someone else what I know.”

“Someone else?”

“Yeah, I'm sorry that I can’t tell you anything else.”
297. GENERATION KILL
Nate’s been coming to Arlington Cemetery every Veterans day that he can since he moved to Washington. Due to other commitments, he isn’t always able to come each year but he consistently makes the effort. He needs to come to pay his respects and to remember his dead.

He visits several graves; each time visiting Captain Morel’s resting place last. He brings flowers and, when Brad can’t come, a smooth rock to leave on the stone cross. He has to honor the man who gave his life to make sure his men came back, that Brad came home to him.
298. GENERATION KILL
Brad doesn’t like going to the cemetery on Veterans Day. He goes when he’s with Nate because he understands Nate finds comfort in the ritual. He prefers to mourn his dead and honor them in his own way.

He slowly unscrewed the computer case and popped it open.

Quietly chanting under his breath, “May He establish His kingdom”

With quick squirts of canned air into the computer, Brad continued, “May His great name be blessed”

Carefully, he pressed the video card into the slot. “from the Father who is in heaven and earth”

Pressing the case closed, “And say, Amen”
299. SG-1
Jackson’s been watching him. Everywhere Cameron goes, Jackson’s lurking nearby. He’s acting squirrelly, even more than usual. He always seems on the point of speaking, has started to once or twice, but never does. Cameron’s getting nervous. He’s afraid he might have given himself away somehow and Jackson is trying to let him down easy and isn’t quite sure how to do it.

Cameron starts making sure he’s never alone with Jackson so he doesn’t actually say something. He doesn’t want to hear Daniel reject him. It’s hard enough knowing Daniel doesn’t want him; he doesn’t need to hear it.
300. GENERATION KILL
“I got you something. You don’t have to accept it if you don’t want, but I thought you might like it.”

Brad hesitated a moment before reaching into a cardboard box at his feet.

He pulled out a blond Chihuahua puppy. It had a thin, black collar with a silver name tag that read Draco.

“I thought Harry might like some company.”

Nate took the tiny dog from Brad, nestling it into the crook of his elbow. A long stroke down his back had Draco wagging his tail and trying to lick Nate’s hand.

“Every Harry needs a Draco, Brad.”
301. GENERATION KILL
“Jackson, I get it. You don’t have to say anything. Please just stop. You’re driving me bananas.”

“Get what? I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Stop playing clueless. We both know you’re much smarter than that. ”

“I’m not playing. I really don’t know what you mean.”

“Jackson.”

“Cam, I mean it.”

“Then why have you been stalking me, if it’s not to tell me to…”

“Tell you to what?”

“You know what? Forget it. Forget I said anything.”

“You can’t accuse me of whatever it is you’re accusing me of and then just tell me to forget it.”
302. GENERATION KILL
“I cannot believe that you named your rats after pretend characters...fake kids in a book, a children’s book. I totally don’t get it.”

“You don’t have to get it. Nate named him Harry because of the white patch on his forehead. Every Harry needs a Draco, so I gave him one.”

Ray laughed so hard he started choking. “You’re fucking with me, right? You two are such saps. At least he can use the excuse that the puppy had a lightning bolt so he had to name him Harry. But you. There are no words for how sappy you are.
303. GLEE
She opened the drawer in her dresser and pulled out the money from under her clothes. She counted it to see if it was enough to pay the electric bill. Not quite yet.

She’s not sure but she suspects Puck does more than just clean pools to get the money he adds to the pile. She’s afraid of asking. If she knows for sure than she wouldn’t be able to accept his money. It makes her feel like a horrible parent, but being a single mother with a dead beat ex-husband, they can't make it on just what she earns.
304. SG-1
Daniel grabbed Cameron’s arm as he tried to hurry out of the room.

“Cameron, what did you think I was trying to tell you?”

“Forget I said anything, okay? It’s not important. I was obviously wrong.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t think so.”

“Please.”

Daniel slid his hand from Cameron’s wrist up to his shoulder. “I really don’t think I can.”

“Jackson. Daniel. What are you doing?”

“Something I’ve wanted to do for a long time.”

Slowly, Daniel pulled Cameron closer. “Tell me if you don’t want this, Cam.”

A soft gasp then a press of lips were his answer.
305. GLEE
Quinn’s body has become alien to her. Her breasts ache, heartburn makes her chest feel like it’s on fire, her stomach is always queasy, and every scent is astonishingly strong and usually horrible. She’s perpetually exhausted, barely staying awake in her classes. Her clothes no longer fit.

Quinn’s mom looks at her with suspicious eyes and her dad keeps asking her why she’s not a Cheerio any more. Quinn doesn’t intend to be mean to Finn all the time. She just can’t stop herself from taking out all her anger, frustration, and fear on him. He makes it too easy.
306. GLEE
“Why did you throw your audition?”

“What? I don’t know what you mean, Puck.”

“I know that you can sing that high note because I heard your practice.”

“It’s none of your business.”

“I don’t understand.”

“You don’t have to understand. Leave it alone.”

“Tell me or I’ll tell Rachel.”

“No, don’t.”

“Then tell me.”

“I couldn’t put my dad through that. It’s bad enough he has a gay son, but one who sings girl songs in front of the whole world? I couldn’t.”

“Hummel… Kurt, you know…”

“He loves me? That’s exactly why I couldn’t do that to him.”
307. GLEE
Quinn is so damn tired of worrying. Worrying about her parents finding out she’s pregnant, about paying the doctor bills, if Finn will find out Puck is the father, if she should put up the baby for adoption, if the Shuesters will be good parents, if she’s even going to graduate.

A quick flick of the razor along her inner thigh, a brilliant red line against white skin, a sense of release so sweet and pure she feels like she’s floating. She’s tired of feeling out of control. This bright spark of pain is the only way she can deal.
308. GLEE
Judy listens at the door as Quinn is throwing up for the third morning in a row. She can’t keep fooling herself any more. She can’t pretend she doesn’t know. The constant sleeping, the nausea, the bags under Quinn's eyes, the beginning of a varicose vein on the back of one leg, all are signs she’s been telling herself are not what she thinks they are. Quinn is pregnant.

Judy doesn’t know what to do. Her husband will never allow Quinn to stay once he knows. He won’t accept an unwed, pregnant daughter in his house.

She walks away silently.
309. GLEE
Picking up the photograph from his nightstand, Burt sat down on the bed.

“Sweetheart, I don’t know what to do with our son, what to do for him.”

Running a thumb along the smooth glass over his wife’s brown hair, he smiled. “You'd understand him. You’d know what to do to make things better. Kurt’s so different from me. He's so much like you. He has your voice. And your strength which is good because he needs it. This town’s so hard on him.”

Sighing, “Honey, I wish you were still here. Kurt needs his mother. And I need you.”
310. GLEE
When Brittany’d been the new girl, playing dumb had been a way to protect herself. Now she finds it easier to keep pretending because it’s what is expected of her. She enjoys saying things completely inane and seeing how people react.

She has had a crush on Quinn for as long as she can remember, for as long as Finn and Quinn have been together. She’s been okay with not getting what she wants because as long as Quinn is happy with him, she’s happy too. She is definitely not okay when she sees how Quinn has started watching Rachel.
311. SG-1
“Daniel, you’re still doing it.”

“What am I still doing?”

“You seem to be always on the point of saying something, but then never do.”

“That’s because I do have to say something, but I’m not really sure how to say it.”

“Is this something to do with us?”

“It is, kind of, but not really.”

“Well, that makes it clear. Clear as mud. Whatever it is, we’ll deal. As long as it’s not that you want there not to be an us.”

“No, that’s not it.”

“Then say it.”

“Remember last month when Ba’al was removed from his host?”
312. SG-1
Looking down at the picture of him with Gandhi, Cam said, “I have to admit whatever I thought you wanted to say, this was surely not it.”

“Totally out of left field, huh?”

Flipping to the photograph of him with his arm around Amelia Earhart, “A little bit, yeah.”

Looking longingly at the Spitfire in the next picture, “But I don’t get why all the angst. Why did it take you such a long time to tell me?”

“Wasn’t sure how you’d react.”

“Aaand?”

“I was afraid you’d think I was only with you because of the letter.”

“What letter?”
313. SG-1
Cam’s knuckles were white as he held onto the yellowed paper in his hands.

With a deep breath, he looked up at Daniel.

Daniel gasped at the anguish on his features.

Cam’s face became expressionless, but he couldn’t hide the pain in his eyes.

“Is this why? Because a me from the past told you we were once lovers, in some other life? You think you had to?”

“Damn it, Cam, no. It gave me courage to say something, but I’ve wanted to since long before I read that letter. I’ve been in love with you for a long time.”
314. GLEE
“You realize you have to tell him?”

“How do you… Mercedes told you.”

“You really think she wouldn’t?”

“Yeah, it was crazy to expect her to keep something I told her to herself.”

“You knew she would tell. That’s what you were hoping for.”

Puck stopped putting away his guitar in its case.

“You wanted her to say something so Finn would find out from someone else and you wouldn’t have to be the one to tell him.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Hummel.”

“You have to tell him, if you want to keep him as a friend.”
315. GLEE
“You want a wine cooler?”

“What kind you got?”

“Fuzzy navel and strawberry daiquiri.”

“Strawberry daiquiri.”

Puck handed her a cold bottle. “Here.”

“What are you doing here, Quinn? Where’s Finn? You know he wouldn’t like you being here right now.”

“I am not his property. Finn doesn’t get to tell me what to do.”

“Damn. You’re fighting again?”

Instead of answering, Quinn opened her drink and took a sip.

“Quinn, why are you even with him?”

“Shut up, Puck. You don’t know anything about us.”

“I know all you two do is fight.”

She sipped her drink without responding.
316. GLEE
Kurt saw the trust in her eyes and it gave him a pang of guilt. He hardened his resolve and started telling Rachel about the slutty kind of girls boys liked, including Finn.

He was doing it for Finn. He had to remember Rachel was the enemy. She wanted to take Finn away from him. Well, okay, from Quinn. But he wanted to take Finn from Quinn, so that made Rachel the enemy.

He had to remember that Rachel didn’t really love Finn, not the way he did. Finn would be better off with him instead of some girl anyway.
317. GLEE
After six months of dating, Puck has learned how to read Kurt’s moods. When he listens to Beyonce at full volume in his bedroom, Kurt’s had a run-in with some idiot at school and needs to lose himself in the music.

On really bad days, he finds Kurt lying beside his mother’s dresser with the drawers pulled open, the faint remnants of her scent perfuming the air. He doesn’t say anything – he knows there really isn’t anything he can say to make it better when Kurt is missing his mother – as he lies down beside his boyfriend, pulling Kurt closer.
318. WHITE COLLAR
Peter doesn’t miss much about the people around him. The agents he works with, the suspects he questions, the higher-ups at the FBI, Neal, and Elizabeth are all easily read. He doesn’t always understand everything he sees, but he does see.

The only one he doesn’t see as clearly is himself. He understands even less. Or maybe it’s that he chooses not to see, to not understand. He doesn’t want to see how he feels about Neal. He thinks of Neal as Caffrey, as nothing more than his CI, someone he works with. At least, that’s what he tells himself.
319. HAWAII FIVE 0
Danny can feel his heart-rate spiking, adrenaline running through his veins, and the dryness in his mouth from the rush of anger flooding through his body. He’s so angry, he’s momentarily speechless. But not for long.

“Do you actually listen to the words that come out of your mouth? No, you cannot go in there without backup. Chin will be here in a minute; Kono is right behind with all of HPD.”

“Danno, in the meantime, the bad guys are getting away. And taking all the evidence with them!”

“God damn it. McGarret, wait for me. I’m coming with you.”
320. HAWAII FIVE 0
“Do you think he gets it yet?”

Chin stopped tapping the computer screen and turned to face Kono.

“Cuz, I thought you said we weren’t going to talk about this anymore.”

“I can’t help it.” Tilting her head to the oblivious duo arguing over another screen. “Look at them.”

Chin turned to study Steve and Danny.

The smile on Steve’s face was in direct contrast to the scowl on Danny’s.

“No, not yet. Danny doesn’t get that Steve is flirting with him. Or trying to anyway.”

They watched as Danny walked away in frustration.

“He is pretty bad at it.”
321. HAWAII FIVE 0
“Good night, Gracie.”

“Good night, Danno.”

Pressing a kiss to her forehead, he tucked her into her bed.

“Are we going to the beach with Steve tomorrow?”

“Do you want to go?”

“Yes, Daddy. He said he’d teach me to surf.”

“He said that, did he?”

“Yes, he did.”

“We’ll go to the beach and we’ll have to see about the surfing.”

“But, Steve said!”

“We’ll see, Grace.”

“Daddy, please.”

“We’ll see, Grace.”

“Ok, Daddy. But Steve said.”

“I know, honey, I know Steve said, but we’ll see, ok?”

“Ok, Daddy. Good night. I love you.”

“Danno loves you too.”
322. SHELTER
Zach feels suffocated. He works, takes care of Cody, surfs, works, takes care of Cody, surfs. It’s an endless cycle of sameness he can’t see a way out of. Every time he allows himself to hope of getting away, he finds his sister drinking and smoking in the kitchen with a friend or getting groped beside the refrigerator by some guy that will be gone in the morning.

He knows he can’t leave Cody. His sister will foist Cody onto their dad who’s lost in a haze of painkillers, barely able to take care of himself. Zach has to stay.
323. SHELTER
Kiss me. Kiss me. Kiss me.

The sheer want clawing at his insides takes away Zach’s breath. It’s thrumming hotly through his blood. He knows he’s staring at Shawn, but he just can’t stop. The laughter on Shaun’s face is stunning.

The heat coming from Shaun’s body, along with the cool breeze blowing across his back, makes Zach move closer to Shaun.

The slight movement catches Shaun’s attention, shifts his focus to Zach.

They stare at each other intently.

Slowly, Shaun moves nearer to Zach, reaching tentatively to touch.

He leans closer to Zach, an agonizing inch at a time.
324. SHELTER
Zach had wanted Shaun to kiss him and he’d enjoyed the kisses. But he’d panicked in the morning and run away.

Now he’s about to burst out of his skin. He keeps replaying the kisses from Shaun over and over in his head. The kisses had left his body buzzing, wanting more kisses, wanting something he couldn’t name but wanted desperately.

He keeps pacing, unable to settle into his painting like he’d been unable to enjoy surfing earlier. He keeps remembering the kisses and the dismissive words he’s said to Shaun.

Finally, he can’t deny himself any longer and goes.
325. SHELTER
Momentarily frozen, Zach stares at the surprise on Shaun’s face. Reaching for Shaun, he steps into the foyer, pulling him into a frantic kiss. They stumble onto the staircase, still kissing.

When Shaun pulls away from him, his heart falls. His hands still on Shaun’s face, he watches as Shaun searches his expression, looking for something. Zach sees the look of resolution on Shaun’s face so he pulls him into another desperate kiss, the bite on his bottom lip dragging a moan from deep in his throat.

Zach reaches down to the hem of Shaun’s shirt and yanks it off.
326. SHELTER
Their first time is rushed and frenzied; Zach’s desperation feeding Shaun’s. He’s waited so long; he’s aching for it. They grapple with one another, each trying to get closer, low moans and loud gasps filling the bedroom.

Frantic kisses, Shaun’s teeth scraping across Zach’s nipples, stubble scratching along the sensitive skin of Zach’s inner thighs, the wet heat of Shaun’s mouth on his cock, the strong suction, all combine to drive him out of his mind with lust.

His head arches back, unable to bear watching as Shaun’s cheeks hollow. Seeing and feeling it are enough to push him over.
327. SHELTER
Shaun loves every minute he spends with Zach. Long days spent on the water, dinners with and without Cody, acting as lookout as Zach tags random walls, hanging out in bars, walking as Zach skateboards, horsing around on the beach, teaching Cody to surf, evenings on the balcony, and hushed conversations on the bluff.

His favorite is their time spent in bed, seeing the sun gild Zach in gold, his moles like bits of melted chocolate on his skin, smile clear in Zach’s eyes, languid kisses, the solid weight of Zach in his arms, and whispered confessions in Shaun’s ear.
328. SHELTER
Shaun couldn’t stand being a secret any more so he’d left Paul, left Los Angeles, to start over. He’d wanted a lover who wouldn’t hide their relationship from everyone, who wouldn’t try to pretend they were nothing more than friends.

He wasn’t expecting this thing with Zach. Each time Zach flinches away from him, it hurts. He doesn’t want to go back to being a secret. He doesn’t want to walk away from what he has with Zach, can’t keep from hoping for more. He’d liked the boy Zach had been. He can see himself loving the man he’d become.
329. SHELTER
It’s not just about the sex, though the sex is amazing. It’s about how Zach makes him laugh, how he listens when Shaun tells him about the relationship with Paul and how it imploded after five years. It’s early mornings spent surfing without saying a word, enjoying the water, the sun, and each other, late afternoons spent in bed talking about Shaun’s ideas for his second book.

It’s how Zach starts to let Shaun in, talks to him about his father, Cody and Jeanne, shows him his art voluntarily, and talks about his mom and how much he misses her.
330. SHELTER
Jeanne’s relied on Zach for a long time, knowing that he will always put Cody first, before Gabe, before Tori, before himself. There’s nothing more important to Zach than Cody. Until now.

She’d called him last night and he hadn’t answered. He’d never not answered her calls before. She’d been worried about Zach hanging out with Shaun before, but it had been a nebulous fear. Now she sees the look on his face. She sees the danger.

She needs him. He has to be able to be there for Cody. He can’t be with Shaun and be there for Cody.
331. SHELTER
Zach is confused when Shaun takes the wine glass from his hand. He doesn’t understand what Shaun wants when he pulls him to his feet. He stands up reluctantly, making a protest about checking on Cody.

Shaun pulls him into his arms. Zach lets himself lean into Shaun’s body, letting Shaun support his weight, holding Shaun in return. He settles more deeply into the embrace, tightening his arms around Shaun, laying his head on Shaun’s shoulder. As Shaun smooths his hands down Zach’s back, a warm feeling of security grows in Zach.

They stand in silence, holding each other close.
332. SHELTER
He’s afraid the panicked beating of his heart and the breathlessness from running around trying to get dressed before Gabe catches him with Zach will give him away as he jerks his brother into a hug. Shaun pounds his brother’s back in an attempt to distract him as he waves Zach out of the room.

The hot twist of want low in his belly as he sees Zach dressed in a shirt belonging to him shocks him. Shaun stares at the door where Zach just left, so caught up in the feeling it takes him a moment to remember Gabe.
333. SHELTER
The bottom falls out of the pit of her stomach when Jeanne hears the news. Zach had been accepted into CalArts. He’d applied again, though she’d repeatedly discouraged him from trying. The voice on the phone keeps droning on. Zach lied to them when he’d said he hadn’t gotten into CalArts when he’d applied before, had turned down a full scholarship.

Jeanne loves Cody, but she’s tired. She can’t do it any more. She doesn’t want to be tied down with the responsibility for him. She has to convince Zach not to bail on her. He has to take Cody.
334. SHELTER
Roy left when Cody was a baby. Cody needed a father so Zach had been there for Jeanne, more for Cody than for her, but she was his sister. They were each all they had. They were family. Their father had checked out long before their mother’s death.

Zach gave up his dream for her, for Cody. When she told him she was leaving Cody without even asking him if he would be willing to care for him, he’d finally had enough. He’d given all he would. He wouldn’t give up Shaun as well.

He had to talk to Shaun.
335. SHELTER
Holding Zach’s face in his hands, Shaun licked into his mouth, lingering on his lower lip. With a gentle nip, Shaun drew back.

Intent on convincing Zach of his sincerity, he implored, “I want you to come back to LA with me, Zack. Sleep in our bed at night. Get up every morning, have breakfast, go to class, come home, have dinner, do homework, paddle when we can. Then do it all again.

Zach rasped, “I want to. I do. But…”

Shaun shook his head. “No buts. Be with me. Let me show you how good life can be.”

“Yes.”
336. SHELTER
“There’s something I have to tell you.”

Easing back a little from their embrace, with some trepidation, Shaun asked, “What?”

“Did you mean it when you said anything?”

Pressing a kiss to Zach’s mouth, Shaun repeated, “Anything.”

“Jeanne is leaving. She’s going to Portland with Alan.”

Confused, Shaun waited for Zach to continue.

Taking a deep breath, Zach whispered, “She’s not taking Cody with her.”

Shaun answered, “You don’t have to ask. You know I love the little guy.”

“She said it would only be six months.”

Tightening his arms around Zach, kissing his temple, Shaun said, “It’ll be okay.”
337. SHELTER
The glimpses of the boy he used to be in the man he is now are disconcerting. The quirk of an eyebrow, the twist of a lip, the laughter in his eyes all bring to mind the boy Zach used to be. The scratch of his nails down Shaun’s back, the drugging kisses, the bites at the nape of his neck as Zach slowly fucks into him, all serve to remind him that Zach is no longer that young boy, but a man full grown.

The man he's made a home with, raises their son with, the man Shaun loves.
338. SHELTER
Zach stretches out his back, the ache in his shoulders painful. He groans as the crack of his spine echoes in the quiet room. Realizing it’s quieter than it should be, he stands up from the table he uses as a desk.

He walks towards the back bedroom, trying to keep from making any noise. He can hear the murmur of voices down the darkened hallway.

Zach stands in the doorway, watching as Shaun helps Cody into his pajamas then tucks in a worn teddy bear into the bed next to Cody.

Sitting down, Shawn began, “Once upon a time…”
339.SHELTER
Shaun’s scared half to death most of the time, though he’ll never admit it to anyone but himself. In the blink of an eye, he’s gone from being alone to becoming a husband and father. Or as close as he’s going to get. He starts shaking with fear each time he really thinks about his life.

So he doesn’t. He gets up in the morning, serves Cody his cereal, helps Zach find the art portfolio he’s always misplacing, gets Cody on the school bus, and Zach on his way to class.

He just lives his life. It’s a good life.
340. SHELTER
“I think you have to tell her.”

“Tell her what?”

“It’s been a year. I think it’s pretty obvious she’s not coming for him. I know you’ve had nightmares where she comes to take him away from us. Frankly, so have I. He’s ours now. We have to make it official.”

“I can’t take Cody away from his mother.”

“Sweetheart, I know she’s your sister. But she’s made it pretty clear she’s not a good parent. And you are. We are. We’re his parents. He deserves to not have to worry about losing his home, losing us.”

“I’ll call her.”
341. SHELTER
Zach’s been acting strangely for the last few days, since Shaun asked him to call his sister. Shaun doesn’t really understand his reluctance. Zach knows it’s a necessary step for them to take. Their situation has worked pretty well, notwithstanding a few glitches at the beginning with getting enough paperwork filed to get Cody enrolled in school and medical care. This will just make it so Jeanne can’t change her mind later and break apart their family.

He understands enough that he leaves Zach to work through his issues with asking for custody. Zach will call Jeanne when he’s ready.
342. SHELTER
Zach’s procrastinating. He does not want to call his sister, doesn’t want to ask for permanent custody of Cody. A part of him doesn’t want to know his sister is the kind of mother who would give away her child permanently, even if it’s already been a year, even if it’s to him, to them.

Shaun is right. Cody needs to know that he will never have to leave them. He’s old enough now to understand better and to worry about things like this.

He can’t put it off any longer. He dials Jeanne. He listens as the phone rings.
343. SHELTER
“She said yes.”

Shaun swept Zach into his arms. “Really? That’s fantastic!”

Noting his silence, Shaun tilted Zach’s chin up with his hand.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong? This is great news.”

Zach answered with a shrug, looking away from Shaun.

Shaun gently turned Zach’s face towards him.

“Zach?”

“It’s just… I don’t understand her. How could she do that to Cody? He’s a great kid. He doesn’t deserve this from her!”

“I don’t know. Jeanne has always been…”

“Jeanne. Yeah, I know how she is. I thought…”

“Maybe she’s doing it for him. She knows he has a good life.”

“Maybe.”
344. SHELTER
After telling Cody, they’d filed all the paperwork with Family Court. It had taken a few months to jump through all the hoops, but finally he was their son. Officially, because, unofficially he’d been their son for a long time.

They’d celebrated with a weekend at the beach-house, though they couldn’t help but see that Cody had seemed happy, but sad at the same time.

“Does this mean Mom doesn’t love me any more?”

“No, Codes, no. It means she loves you so much she wanted you to be happy, so she left you with us. You’re happy, right?”

“Yes.”
345. SHELTER
“Zach, does this mean you’re my Daddy now?”

Surprised, Zach looked up from cutting a stencil.

“Yes, Codes, I guess it does.”

“Can I call you Daddy?”

Zach stepped away from the desk, towards Cody.

“Is that what you want, Cody?”

Zach heard a faint “yeah” in answer.

“Okay, if you want to, you can call me Daddy.”

“I told you you were my Daddy.”

Squeezing Cody into a hug, Zach said, “Yeah, buddy, you did.”

“Is Shaun my Daddy too?”

Momentarily speechless, Zach swallowed then said, “Yes, he’s your Daddy too.”

Cody said, “He’s not Daddy though. He’s Papa.”
346. SHELTER
Shaun had the breath knocked out of him the first time Cody called him Papa, the name highlighting how much Zach and Cody were his family now. He grabbed Cody into a hug, tickling him, their laughter ringing out into the rest of the house. Zach came into the living-room to see what was so funny, joining in on their play.

They collapsed onto the floor, all three still giggling, Cody chattering to his Papa and Daddy about his day at school. The expression of amazement and love on Shaun’s face as he looked at Cody catching at Zach’s heart.
347. SHELTER
“I think it’s time to get a dog.”

“What? A dog? Why?”

“Because every little boy deserves a dog of his own.”

“So this is for Cody?”

“Yeah, it’s time for him to have a dog.”

“Why now?”

“Before we couldn’t really get one for him because of…”

“Of Jeanne. We didn’t know if…”

“We couldn’t do that to Cody. Or to the dog.”

“Yeah.”

“He may not been able to keep it. Jeanne may not have wanted the responsibility of a dog as well.”

“And now he can. You’re right. It is time. We’ll go to the pound tomorrow.”
348. SUITS
Just looking at the rain coming down is making Mike shiver.

The thought of getting home to his soft bed and the down-filled comforter he’d recently gotten makes him button his coat and settle his helmet more firmly on his head.

Bracing himself to make a mad dash to his bike, Mike’s startled by a low voice behind him, “Come on. I’ll give you a ride home.”

With a bright smile over his shoulder to Harvey, he replied, “You mean, Ray will give us a ride home.”

A tiny grin hiding in the corner of his mouth, Harvey asked, “Coming?”
349. SONS OF ANARCHY
"You look tired."

"I’m not sleeping well."

"Is something going on?"

"No, Gemma."

"Tara."

"It’s Jax. He wakes up at the slightest noise. He startles awake all night. When he does sleep, he has me wrapped up so tight I can’t breathe."

"Oh, honey. John was the same way. As was Clay. They get so used to being on alert inside. When they come out, it’s hard for them to stop."

"I’m not used to sharing a bed any more so we don’t quite fit together the way we used to."

"It takes a while. But it does get better."
350. ONE LIFE TO LIVE
Reid Oliver doesn’t try to get Lily to like him, which drives her absolutely insane. All her children love him - more than they ever did Noah - because he treats them like adults, especially Luke.

Luke’s very different with Reid than with Noah. Luke had blossomed in this relationship. She hadn’t noticed how much Luke had deferred to Noah in everything, not really expressing himself. She’s beginning to understand that Luke’s relationship with Noah wasn’t as idyllic as she had thought. Not wanting to cause conflict, Luke had hidden a lot of his problems with Noah from his family.
351. B:TVS
His father never hit Xander. Sometimes he wished he would. It would hurt less than some of the things Tony Harris yelled at him in the middle of a drunken rage.

Tony hadn’t always been that way. Before the accident, he’d been a good dad. When Xander was 10, his father lost his job after he’d hurt his back and couldn’t return to work. Xander was sure Tony blamed him because he’d fallen trying to retrieve Xander’s kite from a tree in the backyard. If Xander hadn’t asked his dad to get it, he wouldn’t have fallen and gotten hurt.
352. SGA
“Colonel Sheppard, I know it’s not my place to say anything about how you run things. You’ve been doing it for a long time – you’ve been doing a great job, by the way – but I really think this is something that you want to be honest with your men about. It will help someone who wants to do it, as well as how they’re treated by the other men.”

“Mr. Woolsey, you’re right, it isn’t. We are going to say something. I don’t want to make Rodney hide any more. I don’t want to hide. Now we don’t have to.”
353. HAWAII FIVE 0
“Steven, do you know what she said to me? Good job! She told me I did a good job.”

“You did do a good job.”

“I know I did. I know she has credentials out the wazoo, but she’s only a rookie on this team. It was not for her to say that to me.”

“Wazoo?”

“Out of all that, you get wazoo? Really, babe, that’s what you’re going to go with?”

“Danny, I’m sorry, but the governor forced her on me. There’s not much I can do about it. I will talk to her. Make things clear to her.”
354. GLEE
“Why do you do that?”

“Do what, Puck?”

“Why do you let him talk to you like that?”

“Like what?”

“You let him talk like he knows what’s best for you. Blaine’s not older than you are. He doesn’t have all the answers, even though he likes to pretend he does. ”

“There is no one else that I can...”

“What? Love? Yes, there is. You just haven’t looked. If you’d just look, I know you’d find someone who already loves you.”

“Like who? Blaine is...”

“No, he's not. Look harder, Kurt. I know there is someone else.”

“You?”

“Yes.”
355. AMERICAN IDOL
“Sweetheart, have you talked to your family lately?”

“I talked to Mama a couple of days ago. She said they’re all doing good. She tried to talk to Dad about me last week. He wouldn’t let her even say my name.”

Cook pulled Archie into his arms.

Barely audible, “he said he didn’t have a son by that name.”

Cook whispered into Archie’s neck, “Baby, are you sure?”

Drawing back, Archie cradled Cook’s face tenderly. “Sure that I love you? Yes. Always yes.”

Pressing a sweet kiss to Cook’s mouth, “Nothing else matters as much as you, as us.
356. THE MAGNIFICENT 7
Chris finds it hard to spill his secrets. Sarah would gently ask him until he was able to express himself to her, but it was a drawn-out process. Vin doesn’t do that. He finds it just as difficult to talk about the important things as Chris does.

It took a while but they were able to figure out how to talk to each other. Vin’s head on his shoulder, their hands clasped between them, darkness cocooning them, they’ll lay in bed or on a bedroll and quietly talk. They talk about their families, the War, their past, and their future.
357. SG-1
It had taken some talking on Daniel’s part to convince Cam not to walk out. He loved Daniel and the thought of Daniel only being with him through some misguided sense of obligation had gutted him. The desperate emotion on Daniel’s face had made him stay and listen.

Daniel’s ability to detail all the time they’d spent together before he’d gotten the letter had helped Cam to see how Daniel’s feelings for him had gradually changed. In turn, Cam had told Daniel of how he’d fallen in love with him, how much he’d struggled not to say anything to Daniel.
358. WITHOUT A TRACE
“Nothing I can say is going to change your mind about why I’m here, Danny. I’m not here marking time until something better comes along. ”

“Martin, I didn’t say...”

“No, but I can see you thinking it. I asked for this assignment because I can make a difference in someone’s life. I can help them get their loved ones back, the way someone helped me.”

“What do you mean?”

“When I was a kid, my best friend went missing. It didn’t matter that he was the housekeeper’s son or that, supposedly, he wasn’t someone important. They brought him home.”
359. CRIMINAL MINDS
“So why is Reid mad at you and not me even though it was my decision? He is mad at me. He just doesn’t want to deal with that yet so he’s taking it out on you, JJ. Once he does, he’ll get over being mad at you. We’ll have a few heated discussions. When he calms down, he’ll remember we really couldn’t say anything. Then it will be ok. It will take a while, but he’ll get there. Till then…”

“We have to get through it.”

“Yes.”

“But Hotch, I…”

“Want to help. This is the way to help.”
360. HAVEN
Nathan can not make himself go into the Grey Gull and pretend to be fine. It had been so hard holding Duke’s daughter in his arms, a living embodiment of all the promises they’d made to each other.

He’d been frantic with worry and hadn’t really paid attention to how Duke looked as he’d gotten older, but now, he sees Duke standing in the doorway, gray at his temples and in his beard, and he just can’t do it. Seeing Duke, getting another glimpse into the future they were supposed to have together, breaks him. He has to walk away.
361. EUREKA
“Are you sure there’s still nothing we can do?”

“Do about what?”

“It’s been a while and there’s always something new in Eureka. Has anything changed enough we can try something else?

“Still don’t know what you’re talking about, Jack.”

“Nathan. Seeing him the last few days has made it clear to me how much I miss him. I thought I could with Allison, but she’s not…”

“Nathan.”

“I didn’t understand before, Henry. I didn’t get it. I thought I did but I didn’t. I understand about Kim now. I need Nate back. Please.”

“I’ll see what I can do.”
362. GENERATION KILL
It was a hazard to wear a ring on deployment so Brad didn’t. Since he still wanted tangible evidence he could carry of Nate, something to symbolize them, he’d decided on a tattoo but he hadn’t been able to choose a design.

A broken ink pen led to fingerprints on Brad’s shoulder and a thumbprint in the hollow of his hip, Nate’s marks on him finally visible. He’d worn the proof of Nate’s touch till it had worn away. They both had stroked the fading marks, realizing this is what they wanted.

They’d inked each other’s fingerprints onto their skin.
363. BAND OF BROTHERS
When they’d asked him to participate in the show, Dick said no, memories still fresh after so many years. He’d said yes when the actors came to talk to him. The actor playing Nix only looks somewhat like him but he definitely moves like him. Sometimes the tilt of his head will catch at Dick’s heart because it reminds him so much of his lost lover.

Watching the actors play out their story on the screen, he wonders if he’s been as circumspect as he’d thought. He hopes that he and Nix weren’t quite so easy to read as that.
364. NEW AMSTERDAM
Each time John falls in love, he can’t help hoping this is the one, the ‘true love’ who’ll free him and he can grow old with. He’ll stare into the mirror, looking for that first gray hair. Each time he doesn’t find it, the hope dies a little. It dies completely when he sees the wrinkles on his lover’s face and none on his own.

This time, he knows he found them. It wasn’t Sara like he’d thought. Maybe it’s the man in the long, black coat. Or the girl with the green bag.

He rewinds the tape, still searching.
365. MOONLIGHT
Josef feels sorry for Mick; he’s setting himself up for heartbreak. He will eventually lose Beth to old age. He’s tried to convince Mick not to put himself through the emotional pain that Josef had gone through, was still going through, even now.

No matter what Josef says, Mick will do what he wants. It’s one of the reasons Josef loves him. Because he does love him, Josef will help Mick put himself back together when Beth is gone. For now, he’ll try to make things easier for them, by letting Mick pretend to be more human than he is.
366. AMERICAN IDOL
“I don’t know how you do it.”

“Do what?”

“Let Kris cheat on you like he does.”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“With that man. That Adam.”

“He’s not cheating. He loves Adam and Adam loves him.”

“And that’s cheating.”

“No, it’s not. Kris’ heart is big enough for both of us. Just because he loves Adam doesn’t mean he’s stopped loving me.”

“He’s married to you, Katie. That means he doesn’t get to love someone else. It’s only supposed to be you.”

“That’s not the way it is with us. Adam is different. Momma, I love him too.”
367. NUMB3RS
Once he’d joined the FBI, David had a plan for his life. He knew where he wanted to be and how to get there. He’d worked toward his goal for years. Moving to Washington had been the next step. He’d allowed himself to get sidetracked and stayed in Los Angeles much longer than he’d intended. He’d told himself he was learning from Don and had put off leaving.

When he’d gotten to DC, he kept thinking about what he’d left behind. About who he’d left behind. He didn’t want to be without him any more.

David knocked on Colby’s door.
368. TEEN WOLF
They were all staring at Jackson, waiting for him to hand the sulfuric acid to Lydia for the Molotov cocktail. He went to pass her the glass bottle, but he paused, a faint memory trying to catch his attention. A brief look at Scott solidified the memory. Both Scott and Stiles said that Derek was the one who was out in the dark hall of the school, attempting to kill them.

Jackson wasn’t sure what to believe. There was someone in the hall. His reluctant fascination with Derek made him question who it was. He reached for the other bottle.
369. SUPERNATURAL RPF
Jared can’t help cataloguing the differences. His arms feel half-empty when he’s holding her; he’s used to holding someone with a much heavier build. Her skin is too smooth against his because he doesn’t also feel the rough rasp of stubble. Her kisses are too gentle.

Jensen had asked Jared to marry him but he hadn’t been able to do it. All he’d been able to think was how his family, his friends, the world would react. He loved Jensen but he’d been too afraid. Now it was too late. Jensen had moved on. Now Jared had to as well.
370. SHELTER
Cody is going to graduate from high school that Saturday. Jeanne has promised to bring his little sister and her husband to the ceremony. Shawn’s family – Cody's family – will all be there.

Cody’s already been accepted to Dartmouth for early admission and is going to move in a couple of weeks. He’s sad because he’s going to be leaving everything he knows, but he is beyond excited about starting a new life on his own. He can’t wait to go; Shawn and Zack have been helping him pack for his move, giving him advice about college life the entire time.
371. X-MEN
Erik does not understand how there is someone in the world who still believes in the good of humanity as much as Charles does, not after everything they’ve seen their fellow mutants suffer at the hands of men. He is undecided on whether Charles truly believes or if Charles is in denial about the cruelty of humans.

Erik is also undecided on whether he thinks this makes Charles an idiot or someone to be admired for having the conviction of his beliefs. All he knows for sure is that he hopes that Charles never has his heart broken for believing.
372. NCIS
Gibbs has been feeling a low level anxiety for a while now. He doesn’t know what has been causing the feeling, just knows his gut is trying to tell him something. He’s been trying to identify the reason, but hasn’t been successful.

He’s verified that everyone is ok. Tony, Abby, and Ducky are fine. He’s even checked on Blackadder at the FBI. It took him a while, but he finally realized that it’s been almost two years since Tony left Baltimore and joined NCIS. Tony has always left a job after two years.

Gibbs has to convince him to stay.
373. WHITE COLLAR
Peter cradled the slight weight in his arms, taking care to hold their daughter’s head. He marveled at her tiny fingernails, her pink mouth, and her bright blue eyes. He gently ran a finger down her smooth cheek.

“El, she’s perfect.”

Looking to their son resting in Neal’s arms, he said, “They both are.”

He stood to give his exhausted wife a soft kiss. “Hon, you did good.”

With a tired smile, Elizabeth replied, “We did good, babe. This was definitely a team effort.”

Neal turned to face her. “Sweetheart, it was mostly you. We just loved you through it.”
374. INCEPTION
Eames jerked himself awake, turning to see Arthur prone beside him. After fumbling the needle out of his arm, Eames reached to help Arthur get upright. Arthur struggled to sit on the edge of the bed. Scrubbing his hands across his face, Arthur leaned forward, trying to catch his breath while Eames rubbed his back.

A stuttered whisper from Arthur, “You came for me.”

Pulling Arthur closer to him, Eames kissed his temple. “How could you think I wouldn’t come for you? Darling, I will always come for you, no matter where you are, even limbo.”

“I know that now.”
375. LEVERAGE
“I’m thinking of telling my Nana.”

The rhythmic thunk of a knife into a cutting board stopped then started again.

“Are you sure you want to do that, Alec?”

Reaching across to snag a piece of fruit arranged onto a tray, “I think it’s time. Owww, that hurt.”

Elliot returned to chopping. “That’s for dinner.”

“It’s been over a year. I talk to her about you and Parker all the time. I’m pretty sure she knows something is going on. She just doesn’t know with whom.”

“How is she going to react when she finds out it’s both of us?”
376. NSYNC
“I’m tired of hiding.”

“I know, J. Me too. You ready for what not hiding will mean? Even if we say we recently fell in love, they’ll find out we’ve actually been together since you were 17.”

“And that Britney and Jessica were about publicity, along with the others.”

“You know what will happen then. No matter what you’ve done, what you will do, all they’ll remember is the Britney/Jessica thing.”

“They’ll only remember the lies.”

“Yes. I’m OK with waiting. As long as we can be together, we don’t have to say anything.”

“Than not yet, C. But soon.”
377. THE PROFESSIONALS
“What are we going to do?”

“You know there’s only one choice.”

“Sunshine, no, there isn’t. We both would do a good job. Either one of us would.”

“Bodie, I agree, we both could do a good job. I also think that together we could do a great job.”

“That isn’t an option. If it was, it would be ideal. Which one of us is going to do it?”

“It has to be you. You have to head CI5 now. You can’t return to what you did and I can. I’ll return to the Met. They’ve got something for me.”
378. BONES
“You going to tell her you still love her?”

“Hodgins, she’s married to you. You’re about to have a baby. Just leave me out of it. It’s hard enough…”

“Hard enough to see her with someone else? Why did you tell her you didn’t love her? You clearly still do.”

“I knew she loved you. Every so often, she’d say your name when we…”

“So you decided to let her go?”

“I wanted her to be happy. Is she?”

“Happy? I think so. I hope so. If you hadn’t let her go, she’d still be with you. Wendell, thank you.”
379. GLEE
Noah pulled off his glasses and threw them onto his desk. With a groan of exasperation, he pinched the bridge of his nose. Scrubbing his hands across his face, he sighed. Noah raked his hands through his hair, scratching his nails across his scalp. He pulled slightly at his curls in frustration, trying to alleviate the stress he was feeling.

Noah had been working on the report for hours and his brain was fried. Sighing again, he put his glasses back on and turned to his computer. He had to finish his paperwork so he could get home to Kurt.
380. GLEE
Pointing at a different blouse in the closet, Kurt said, “No, Momma, wear this one.”

“Are you sure? They look the same to me. They’re both blue.”

Kurt giggled, “They are not the same.”

Pulling Kurt close to her and blowing a raspberry into his neck, Grace laughed. “Well, if you say, sweet boy, than it must be so.”

Curling into her and giggling, Kurt squealed, “Momma, stop, it tickles.”

Smoothing a hand over his cheek, Grace pressed a soft kiss to her son’s forehead, “Ok, baby, I’ll wear the one you think looks best. You know I always do.”
381. GLEE
Kurt loved sitting with his mother in the window seat in the late afternoon sun while Grace read to him. She read fairy tales, science fiction, poetry, novels, and fantasy to him, among many others.

She knew he didn’t understand all of it, but he loved to hear her read so she shared her favorites with him. Kurt would fall asleep and burrow into her side while she continued reading. They spent many afternoons this way.

As Kurt got older, he started reading to her. He read her books about bears, red dogs, curious monkeys, and green eggs and ham.
382. GLEE
Grace was silent, pale with shock. She’d dreamed about a little girl, with her brown hair and Burt’s hazel eyes, a little sister for Kurt. She’d been sure she was pregnant; she’d had the same symptoms of her pregnancy with Kurt. She hadn’t known the symptoms of a pregnancy were the same as the ones for ovarian cancer.

She had to go home. She had to tell Burt he was going to lose his wife. She had to find the words to tell Kurt he was going to lose his mother.

Grace took a deep breath. “You said six months?”
383. GLEE
Grace continued reading after Kurt fell asleep, his body leaning into hers, his weight gradually getting heavier against her. She finished her book and went to get up. A sharp pain in her side caused her to gasp. After a moment, she was able to stand.

Grace wanted to pick Kurt up, cradle him close, to take him to his room for his nap, but she couldn’t. From one day to the next, she’d been unable to carry him, her body not strong enough to hold his.

Shaking him gently, “Come on, sweet boy. It’s time to go to bed.”
384. GLEE
“Son, be careful with your mother. You’re getting big and you have to be...”

“Honey, leave him be. Kurt is helping me choose a dress for church.”

“I just don’t want him to accidentally hurt you.”

“Burt, I’m all right, a little tired, but other than that...”

“Are you sure, sweetheart? You’re feeling ok?”

“I’m feeling good. I get to spend the entire day with my sweet boys, so I’m feeling really good.”

“And you’ll tell me when you’re not, right, Gracie?”

“We won’t have as much time together as I’d like to, darling, but I will tell you. Promise.”
385. GLEE
They’ve known each other since pre-school. Their mothers were friends who scheduled play-dates for them. They’d been best friends through third grade, until Kurt’s mother died and Noah’s father had left his family. They hadn’t been able to maintain a friendship with both of them angry at the world. Noah had become Puck and Kurt the strange kid that everyone else talked about.

Being in glee has made them be together for the first time in years without Kurt ending up in a dumpster. They’ve started talking to each other again.

“You wanna come over to play a video game?”
386. GLEE
“Noah, I can not believe you’re making me help you shop for a present for your boyfriend!”

“Sarah, shut up and I’ll take you for some ice cream afterwards.”

“You do know I’m not ten years old any more, right?”

The faint tinge of red across his cheeks made Sarah pause.

“Wait a minute. Where exactly are we going?”

She didn’t understand Noah’s response to her question.

“Noah, why are you being so mysterious? What’s going on?”

“We’re going to Von’s.”

“We’re going to a jewelry store! Oh my god, Noah, are you going to ask Kurt to marry you?”
387. GLEE
“Sarah, you promised you wouldn’t say anything.”

“Not even to Ma?”

“Especially not to Ma. You know she still does lunch on Wednesdays with Carol. She won’t be able to help herself. She won’t mean to but she’ll say something. Carol tells Burt everything. Burt won’t say anything to Kurt, but he can’t keep a secret to save his life. He’ll give it away.”

“Noah, I have to tell someone!”

“Pipsqueak, you can’t say anything to anybody. There are no secrets in this town. Someone will tell Kurt. I want it to be a surprise.”

“Ok. I won’t say anything.”
388. GLEE
“Kurt, have dinner with me on Saturday?”

“Weren’t you doing something with your family on Saturday?”

“I’d rather be with you.”

“We going to Breadstix?”

“We’re going to the Brick House.”

“We’re going all the way to Ft. Wayne?”

“Yeah, I figured we’d make a day of it.”

“I thought we came back to visit our families for the holidays?”

“We have. I want to spend the day with you, just us.”

“Need a break, Noah?”

“I do. I love them, but I need a day with you, babe.”

“Ok, we’ll go. It’ll be nice to see my boyfriend again.”
389. GLEE
Noah loves to watch Kurt unwind as he does his nightly routine. Noah washes his face while he showers so he doesn’t go through the same process that Kurt does. He’s not complaining about the results; he loves Kurt’s soft skin.

Kurt tells him about his day while Noah lies in bed, pretending to read, but paying more attention to Kurt smoothing lotion along the sharp line of his jaw and across the pale roundness of his cheek.
Noah sees the sly smile on Kurt’s soft lips and looks up to Kurt’s amused eyes.
“Are you listening, Noah?”
“Always, babe.”
390. GLEE
“Finn told me you were thinking about joining the Marines.”

“Finn shouldn’t have told you.”

“You’re right. You should have. I thought we were friends.”

“Kurt, we are friends, but you all have plans. You and Rachel are going to New York. San and Brit are going to LA. Everyone's leaving. I don’t want to stay here alone. And school’s not for me.”

“It is. You’ve done a lot better since we’ve been studying together. Come with me to New York, Puck. Don’t give up on your dreams yet. You can go to school with me. There’s still time.”

“Ok.”
391. GLEE
Grace and Burt were going to grow old together; now she won’t see the end of the year. They’d made so many plans. There are so many things she’s going to miss. She’ll miss everything in Kurt’s life. She’s going to miss his graduation, from high school and college. She won’t see him fall in love, get married, have children.

Grace had wanted siblings for Kurt, but he’ll have only his father. She won’t be there for him when he’ll need his mother. So she will do what she can to have him know her.

She turned the camera on.
392. GLEE
Stretching up to his toes, Noah reached to the back of the closet shelf. He felt the sharp corners of a box under his fingertips. After a brief struggle, he was able to get it down. It was an intricately carved wooden box.

Placing it gently on the bed, he pulled it open. Inside were stacks of letters tied together with silk ribbon, a faint scent of roses drifting into the air.

“Kurt, what’s this?”

“What? Oh, the letters. They’re from my Momma. I have some tapes too. Come here, babe. Let me show you how awesome my Momma was.”
393. GLEE
“You going to Rachel’s party, Puck?”

“Nah, I don’t think so. It’s not exactly my scene. I think I’m going to hang out for a while at the bowling alley.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. Her dads have a good liquor cabinet, but not really in the mood to hang out in the Berry Oscar room tonight.”

“Everyone else from glee will be there.”

“Everyone?”

“He’ll be there.”

“I don’t know what you mean, Finn.”

“You don’t, huh? You really going to front? I know.”

“You know?”

“How you feel about Kurt? Yeah.”

“He’s going to be there? Then yeah, I’ll come.”
394. GLEE
Pounding on the door, Puck yelled, “Kurt, let me in. Please.”

When there was no response, he pounded the door again. “I only kissed her. That’s all.”

Quieter, “I’m sorry. I was drunk. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

Leaning against the door, “That’s a lie. I do know what I was thinking.”

He continued, “It was stupid! I panicked, ok? We’ve only been dating for six months. We’re still so young; today’s your 21st birthday. And I was thinking that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you.”

The door slowly opened.
395. GLEE
"Pass me the onions, please."

"Do you want the tomatoes too, Kurt?"

"Yeah."

"What you making?"

"I've been craving Mexican all day."

"You want me to make the tacos while you make the rice and beans?"

"Sounds good, babe."

"Chicken or beef?"

"Chicken, I think. We have to start thinking about your cholesterol level, Noah."

"Yes, dear."

"I talked to Finn earlier."

"How they doing? Her morning sickness get better?"

"Yeah, they tried something or other that Carol told them about and it helped."

"I’m glad. Aretha was having a hard time with that."

"She was, but she’s doing better."
396. GLEE
“It’s time to go to bed, Miss Audrey.”

“Daddy, you’re so silly. I’m a princess.”

“Oh, so sorry. Princess Audrey, it’s time for bed.”

“Don’t wanna go to bed. I’m not tired.”

“Tell you what, sweet girl. Poppa will read you a story once you’re in bed.”

“Three.”

“Two.”

“Ok, but he has to do all the voices.”

“I’ll make sure to tell him.”

“Come on, get in the bed. After I tuck you in, I’ll get Poppa.”

~~~

“Noah, Audrey wants you to read her a story. And she says you have to do the voices.”

“I’m coming, babe.”
397. GLEE
Kurt watches as Noah dresses. Adjusting his pants till they hang just so, the sliding of cufflinks into the sleeves of his dress shirt, the slow buttoning of his waistcoat, the deft movements of his hands tying his tie into a half-Windsor, the smoothing down of his coat, the careful taming of the curls at his nape, the very image of a successful man ready for the day.

Kurt likes seeing him like this, watching him don his armor to do battle against the world. The severe image changes when Noah notices him watching, the smile on his face radiant.
398. GLEE
“I’m your husband. If I don’t tell you than who will.”

Noah stopped walking, realizing Kurt wasn’t beside him. Turning, he saw Kurt standing still, an arrested expression on his face. Walking back, he placed a hand on Kurt’s chest, “What’s wrong, babe?”

“You called me your husband.”

“Yeah, and?”

“That’s the first time I’ve ever heard you say that.”

“And that’s why you’re looking all gobsmacked? You realize we’ve been married for almost a year?”

“It’s just… It’s the first time you’ve said that.”

Laughing softly, “Babe, it’s funny, what catches your attention sometimes. Come on. We’ll be late.”
399. GLEE
Noah’s hand rested on the back of Kurt’s neck, rubbing in small circles, pressing into the bunched muscles. “It will be all right, babe. You know you’re perfect for this. They’ll see it too.”

Moaning in relief, Kurt tilted his head so Noah could reach the other side of his neck. The painful press of fingers into the knotted muscles felt amazing. “Yeah, but, there are so many others…”

“You’ve been practicing for this for weeks. You’ve worked really hard and you got this.”

With a swift kiss to Kurt’s mouth, Noah whispered, “Break a leg.”

Kurt walked out onstage.
400. GLEE
“Mercedes, it’s beautiful! Finn did good.”

“So you didn’t help him choose it, Kurt?”

“Hey, I picked it by myself!”

“And you did great, Finn. You’ll have to tell me how he proposed, Mercedes.”

“Only if you’ll tell me how Puck proposed, Boo.”

“I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because he never actually asked me. He just started talking about what we’d do when we got married. He put the ring on my hand when I was asleep that night.”

“Dude, you never asked him? You told me you were going to!”

“If I had asked him, he could have said no!”
401. GLEE
“Poppa, hurry up. Daddy has the music ready.”

“Princess, I’m coming. I just had to finish that report and I’m done now.”

“Hurry, Poppa! We have to practice!”

“I’m here. Are you ready?”

“Yes!”

“Ok. Kurt, turn on the music, please.”

Pulling her arms into position, Noah said, “Honey, put your arms up like this. Now put your feet on mine. I won’t let you fall, alright?”

“Alright.”

“You and Daddy get a dress today?”

“It was the prettiest one!”

“You are going to be the prettiest flower girl for Finn’s wedding.”

Noah slowly waltzed his daughter around the room.
402. GLEE
“Going to the prom with the hobbit again this year?”

“Not that it’s any of your business, Puck, but no, I’m not. We won’t be going anywhere together any more. We broke up.”

“Why did you two break up? Did you finally realize how much of a douche he is?”

“Again, not your business.”

“Kurt, you have to tell me what happened.”

“Why in the world would I do something like that?”

“You have to tell me what he did so I won’t make the same mistakes he did.”

“What do you mean?”

“Will you go to prom with me?”
403. GLEE
“Puck, can I talk to you for a minute, please?”

“What’s up, Hummel?”

“You took Calculus last year with Mr. Harris, right?”

“Yeah.”

“I have him this year. His class is killing my GPA. No matter how hard I study, I just don’t get it. He’s always a jerk if you ask a question he thinks is stupid, so I don’t ask. Because I don’t understand something, it makes it harder to understand the next thing.”

“He’s a total douche like that. He’s a horrible teacher. You need some help?”

“Yes, please.”

“I’ll come to your house tonight. We’ll study.”
404. GLEE
Noah squeezed the bridge of his nose, trying to stave off the impending headache.

“You know you’re going to have to give in and get glasses.”

“I don’t need glasses, Kurt.”

“You do.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Just because you have to wear reading glasses doesn’t mean you’re getting old, Noah.”

“Only old people need reading glasses.”

“That’s not true.”

Sitting down on Noah’s lap, Kurt leaned down to kiss him. “Will it help if I tell you that I think boys in glasses are sexy?”

Pulling away with a nip at Kurt’s lower lip, “I'll set up a doctor’s appointment.”
405. GLEE
“Decided on your classes yet, Kurt?”

“Not yet. Still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up.”

“I’ve been thinking about the same thing myself.”

“I have figured something out. I’ve been talking about going to Academy of Dramatic Arts in New York. I finally realized that that’s not where I want to go to school.”

“You and Rachel have been talking about going there for forever! Are you sure?”

“Yeah, Puck, I am.”

“So what are you going to do?”

“I want to go to the Culinary Institute. I want to be a chef.”
406. GLEE
“Kurt, you’ve gotten me thinking.”

“Yeah? What about? I hope it didn’t hurt.”

“Shut up, you. I’m serious. I’ve been thinking about what you said, about being a chef. Got me thinking about what I wanted to be doing for the rest of my life. I don’t want to do something that I’ll hate.”

“You decided what you want to be when you grow up?”

“I really think I have.”

“Going to tell me?”

“I’m good with numbers and I want to help small businesses get out of the economic mess we’re in. I just have to figure out how.”
407. GLEE
“Kurt, we have to talk about this. We can’t keep having the same fight over and over.”

“If you wouldn’t…”

“I’m not actually doing anything.”

“Noah…”

“You know I’m not.”

“I know.”

“You’re just afraid that I will.”

“Yeah.”

“You look when a tight pair of jeans walk by. It’s the same thing.”

“No, it isn’t.”

“Yes, it is. I’m just looking. Just because it’s a girl doesn’t mean it’s more.”

“But…”

“I know when you look it doesn’t mean anything more than appreciation. For me, it’s the same. I’m it for you, right?”

“Yes.”

“You’re it for me too.”
408. GLEE
“Noah, you know she can’t come home. She’s only been gone a couple of months; her first semester isn’t even over.”

“You don’t want Audrey to come home?”

“That’s not fair! She’s my kid too. Of course, I want her here, safe and happy! But I know being away is what she needs. She’s just lonely and homesick right now.”

“She wants to come home.”

“She is a grown woman and wants to be treated like one. To us, she’s our little girl and we’ll treat her like that. No one would be happy if she came home.”

“I guess.”
409. GLEE
Puck keeps surprising him. When Puck had asked him to the prom, it had shocked him silent long enough that Puck’s face had started to blank. He’d finally been able to whisper his answer.

They’d gone to the prom. Kurt had been expecting this prom to be the same as the one before, where they both went, but hadn’t really been together. Puck held his hand, danced with him, and kissed him at the end of the night.

Puck surprised him again when he kissed Kurt at school and walked him to his classes with his arm around his shoulders.
410. GLEE
“You have everything, son?”

“Yes, Dad. The Nav is completely packed.”

“Puckerman has all his stuff?”

“Yes, he does. Sam is all packed up. Finn too.”

“So tell me the plan again?”

“We’re driving to New York. Puck and I will move into our apartment. Since their semester starts a week later, Sam and Finn are going to stay for a few days, then they’re going to drive down to Atlanta.”

“And you’re sure you’re ok with Finn keeping your Nav?”

“Sam and Finn will get more use out of it at Georgia Tech than we will in New York.”
411. GLEE
Puck watches the couples around him. He finds them all fascinating, likes seeing how they interact with each other, likes seeing if he can guess how they’re doing just by watching them. He watches one couple more sometimes, trying to figure them out. He admits he finds them confusing. On the surface, Kurt and Blaine seem to have a lot in common, but in reality, they are so very different.

Puck’s watching them so closely, he’s the first to see the cracks. He notices the silences, the stiff body language, the eye avoidance. He’s not surprised when they break up.
412. GLEE
“What are we going to do now, Kurt?”

“I don’t know, Finn. I was so sure I was going to get into NYADA. I still can’t believe I didn’t make it. I thought she liked me. Dad making us apply to New York Conservatory for Dramatic Arts turned out to be a good thing, I guess. Is that what you want to do now? Still want to act? Go to California with Puck? Something else? What do you want?”

“Go to New York with you and to California with Puck.”

“Can’t do both.”

“Take Puck with us to New York.”
413. GLEE
Kurt feels like he’s always running, to his classes, to his job at the bookstore, to meet the other kids in his study groups, to work on his projects, to hang out with his friends. He doesn’t have a free moment, can never quite catch his breath.

New York is even more exciting than he ever dreamed. There is always something going on, something new to discover, someone new to meet. Being able to share it all with Finn and Puck makes it even better. He loves it. He keeps meaning to call Blaine, but there’s always something going on.
414. GLEE
“I love you with all my heart, Noah, but if you don’t stop touching me right this second, I swear I’m going to hang you up by your toenails!”

“Babe, what the hell?”

“Sorry,” pressing quick kisses to Noah’s shoulder, “it’s just so damn hot. It’s making me cranky.”

“I see that. You call the super to ask how much longer the AC is going to be out? I know summers in New York are supposed to be hot, but this is completely ridiculous.”

“Yeah, he promised by tomorrow.”

“So, in the meantime, come take a cold shower with me.”
415. GLEE
“You talk to him yet?”

“Kurt won’t talk to me about it. I tried talking to him but he kept changing the subject. When I still tried to talk to him about it, he walked out of the room.”

“He talk to anyone about it?”

“Burt tried, but Kurt said there’s nothing to talk about. Mom tried to talk to him too.”

“I can’t believe the hobbit broke up with him via e-mail.”

“He said he couldn’t ever get Kurt on the phone.”

“Kurt call him?”

“No, he said if that’s what Blaine wanted, that’s what he would get.”
416. GLEE
“Dude, why haven’t you talked to anyone about what a shitty thing the hobbit did to you?”

“Maybe because I didn’t want to talk to anyone about Blaine?”

“Why not? Did he do such a number on you that you can’t handle even talking about it?”

“Not that it’s any of your business, but he didn’t.”

“He didn’t break your heart, huh? Then why all the drama queen routine lately?”

“He didn’t break my heart. That’s why I haven’t wanted to talk about it. It was over a while ago. I just didn’t want to face it.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”
417. GLEE
“You say that you’re over him, that it’s over. How can you be so sure?”

“Can we not talk about this any more, Puck? I really don’t feel like talking about this.”

“Too bad because I do. I want to know why you’re so sure.”

“Because I realized I like someone else.”

“What? You like someone other than the hobbit? When the hell did you meet someone? You’re always running around saying you don’t have time for anything!”

“My math tutor.”

“Wait a minute. I’m your math tutor.”

“Now do you see why I don’t want to talk about this?”
418. GLEE
“I don’t know what you want me to say to that.”

“Puck, that’s the point! I don’t want you to say anything! I didn’t want you to know at all. I would have told you before if I had wanted you to know!”

“Why not?”

“How are you feeling right now? After what I just told you?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Angry? Disgusted? Feel like running away?”

“From you? Not even.”

“No?”

“No. The truth is I don’t even know what I’m feeling. You’re my boy, though. I’m not going to go running off like some wuss. I won’t do that.”
419.GLEE
“You want me to what?”

“I want you to help me shave my head.”

“You’re going to cut your mohawk? Why?”

“We’re going to New York in a week. I think it’s time for a change. I want something new.”

“Okay. But why are you asking for my help?”

“I figured it’s either you or Finn and, no offense to your brother, I think you can actually help more than he can. Last time he tried to help, it was a disaster.”

“Are you sure, Puck? I don’t want you having a fit because your hair is ruined.”

“I won’t.”
420. GLEE
“I would not be stupid enough to fall for such bullshit!”

“Puck, what are you going on about? Keep it down! I’m trying to study for my Econ exam tomorrow.”

“Some guy tried to pick me up today, by telling me I should be a model. He had a business card and everything. He must have really thought I was an idiot!”

“Let me see it.”

“It was just some asshole, Kurt.”

“This card is from James Roddey!”

“Yeah, and?”

“You don’t know who that is? He’s a director at Wilhelmina International!”

“Who?”
421. GLEE
“You going to call that guy?”

“What guy?”

“Don’t even try it. Kurt told me all about it. He also said you weren’t going to call him.”

“Why would I call some random guy who gave me his business card?”

“To find out what he wants.”

“That’s exactly why I don’t need to call him. I know what he wants.”

“How do you know what he wants if you haven’t talked to him yet?”

“Finn, you know exactly what some guy giving out his card wants.”

“You don’t know that. What’s it going to hurt to just call the guy?”
422.GLEE
Finn and Kurt had been pestering him all week to call the guy from the modeling agency. He’d had enough and agreed to call, but he’d been putting it off. He knew what the douche wanted and didn’t get why they were determined he call him.

For hours, Puck had been dialing the hand-written number on the back of the card, but not pressing send. The thought of the look on Kurt’s face when Puck admitted he hadn’t called finally made him call.

“This is Noah Puckerman. You gave me your business card last week and told me to call.”
423. GLEE
“I called that guy.”

“What did he say?”

“He wants to meet to talk about a contract. He also asked me if I had any pictures. When I said no, he set up a session with a photographer.”

“With a professional photographer?”

“Yeah, for late next week. He said not to dress up or anything, that they would have something for me to wear. That sounds totally sketchy, doesn’t it?”

“No, Puck, it just means they’ll have something other than your usual for you to wear.”

“I still don’t want to go, Kurt.”

“You want me to go with you?”
424. GLEE
Puck is still not sure what the hell happens. He has some photos taken, signs a contract, and then forgets all about it. Until the first call.

Puck has some more photos taken. Then a few more. Until he spends more time doing that than he spends waiting tables. He quits his job at the restaurant and starts traveling all over the East Coast. Then the trips to the West Coast begin.

The day he gets the call about the trip to Paris he realizes this is his life now. This is not how he thought his life would be.
425. GLEE
“Your spring break starts next week, right? And you’re off for a week?”

“Two weeks, actually. Starting on Monday. Why?”

“You don’t have plans?”

“Not yet. Finn was talking about maybe going back to Lima to see Dad and Carole, but I don’t think I want to do that.”

“You hiding from the hobbit?”

“No, there’s just not anything for me there, other than Dad and Carole. I’ll see them when they come up for the holidays.”

“You wanna go with me to Paris?”

“Ha. You’re so funny.”

“I have a job there for next week.”

“Seriously?”

“I’m serious.”

“Yes!”
426. GLEE
Kurt had been seeing Puck in a different light since the trip to Paris. Puck had been so unlike what Kurt was used to. They traveled all over the city and Puck had been comfortable no matter where they’d gone. It wasn’t the usual badass attitude he’d had growing up. There was an ease of being in his own skin which infused all his actions.

Everyone’s manner toward him reflected this. He’d been Noah Puckerman, professional model, to everyone around him which in turn had affected his behavior in response. Kurt had seen him as Noah, not Puck.

“Noah?”

“Yeah?”
427. GLEE
“Kurt, have you finished your chemistry homework yet?”

“I’m just about done. What’s up?”

“Can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Sure. What’s on your mind?”

“You know how Mom and Burt have been married almost a year?”

“Yeah.”

“Tomorrow is Father’s Day. It’s the first since they got married and I was wondering…”

“If you should do something for Dad?”

“Yeah.”

“I guess it depends on whether or not you want to do something for him, Finn. Dad won’t be expecting you to, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“I think I kind of do.”

“Then do it.”
428. GLEE
“What are you doing tomorrow, Kurt?”

“I’m on the afternoon shift at the bookstore, so I’m sleeping in, going out to eat, then to the movies.”

“What you watching? There’s nothing new out this week.”

“I know, Noah. I’ve already seen Men in Black, Snow White, Battleship, Prometheus, The Avengers; I even saw Madagascar. I think I’m going to watch Avengers.”

“Didn’t you just say you watched that already?”

“Yep, twice.”

“Twice? You’re going to watch it again?”

“I liked it. Each time I noticed something new.”

“Can I come with?”

“Sure. You can help watch for the background stuff.”
429. GLEE
“Anything else, sweetheart?”

“No, thanks.”

Seeing the faint grimace on Kurt’s face at the waitress’ question, Noah stopped stirring.

“What’s the matter?”

“Nothing.”

Squeezing lemon into the tea and stirring, Noah hummed quietly.

“It’s nothing.”

“Try this.”

“It’s tea, Noah, I’ve had tea before.”

“Not like this. It’s different here. Try it.”

“It’s good.”

Kurt took another sip.

“Will you tell me what’s the matter?”

“Everyone keeps calling me sugar, honey, sweetheart, baby. I’m not a baby.”

“They don’t mean it like that. It’s a southern thing. They do that to everyone.”

“They don’t think I’m just a kid?”

“No.”
430. GLEE
“What’s going on with you and Puck, Kurt?”

“What do you mean? There’s nothing going on with me and Noah.”

“Right there is exactly what I mean! Since when is Puck Noah? He’s Puck!”

“I’ve gotten used to calling him that because everyone else calls him that.”

“Which everyone? Everyone I know still calls him Puck.”

“Everyone he works with.”

“That’s another thing. You know everyone he works with. You’ve gone to Paris, to LA, you even went to North Carolina when he did that bit part on Iron Man. You can’t say nothing is going on. What is it?”
431. GLEE
“Kurt said there wasn’t anything going on with you two when I asked him.”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t do that, man! That’s exactly what Kurt said. You know what I mean! There is something going on with you and Kurt. You take him with you on your trips whenever you can. You go out and eat all the time. You’re practically attached at the hip, dude!”

“Finn, there is nothing going on with Kurt. Everything is the same as it’s always been.”

“Why does it sound like you want there to be?”

“Maybe because I do. But he doesn’t.”
432. TEEN WOLF
“Show me how, I don’t know, I want…”

Derek stopped Stiles’ babble with a gentle nip to his lower lip. “What do you want?”

Taking a deep breath, Stiles started speaking again, “I’ve never done this before. I want to do it right.”

With a press of his lips against the corner of Stiles’ mouth, Derek whispered, “there isn’t a right or a wrong way. It’s about what feels good. Does this feel good?”

Derek licked his way into Stiles’ mouth, catching Stiles’ moans on his tongue.

Letting his head fall back, trying to catch his breath, Stiles gasped, “Yes.”
433. SUITS
Donna can’t help feeling guilty. She and Rachel have been friends for years. She knows Mike’s secret and why he won’t tell Rachel. The possibility of Rachel telling is real, either by accident or in a fit of rage after Mike breaks her heart. Because he will. The way that he looks at Harvey when he thinks nobody is watching gives him away. When Harvey finally decides to stop pretending he’s not looking back just as much will be the end of MikeandRachel.

The only thing that she can do is be there for Rachel. “Wanna go get a drink?”
434. TEEN WOLF
“There’s a second line. My God, Jackson, there’s a second line. I’m pregnant.”

“Take a breath, Lydia. It will be ok.”

“What am I going to do?”

“What we are going to do is get married. The wedding’s already scheduled for next month. We’ll still move to Cambridge.”

“It’s not what we planned.”

“It’s not going to be exactly what we planned, but it’s going to be all right.”

“But how will it work?”

“It won’t be easy, but we’ll make it work. Together. We’ll be a family. We’re going to get our happy ending.”

“Are we?”

“Yes, we are.”