What is this feeling?
“Levi, the boy is asleep again, which is good considering he looks like he hasn't had a decent bout of sleep in a very long time. He was also able to hold down a little food an water which is good. I went to change his bandages but all his new wounds were healed already, so he is sleeping under a mound of blankets. For a kid who says he has a weirdly high body temperature he sure likes blankets.” Levi nodded listening to Perta's rambling. He didn't have to look at her to know there was something she wanted to talk about that she was trying to work up the courage for and Levi knew he was not going to like it. Instead of looking at her he kept looking through the window, hoping for once Hanji would save him from a situation, they should be here soon anyways. “Captain why did you accept him as your responsibility? First that is not like you and second you know he idolizes you and seems to have a school yard crush on you. False hope will crush him completely. You keep saying you don't want anyone in your life you could lose again, that is why you keep the rest of us at arms length and we have respected that, except for Hanji, but you can't do that to a kid where you are his only hope in happiness.”
“There is something about him I can't shake. There is something in his eyes. He went through hell, just like me, and yet he has a fire in his eyes that died in mine before I left the Underground. He calls himself a monster in hatred and fear I call myself a monster in a fact. I walk into the room with him and it feels like the air is stolen from mean then agitated. I empathize with him, I have actual emotions around him and I have no idea what is going on. I don't do emotions, I have never been good at them but after loosing so many people I just don't anymore. For some unknown reason I want to be responsible for him and this is very uncomfortable for me.” Levi spilled out to his female companion, Petra was one of the few people Levi trusted enough to talk to like this if he was actually having a problem he couldn't bury.
“Oh Levi, if I didn't know any better I would say you were falling in love. You both have lived through nightmares and consider yourselves monsters but are willing to throw your lives away for anyone you care about. This could be a good thing Levi, you can't deny you both deserve to be happy. Maybe you can save each other from your own nightmares that haunt you.” Petra smiled, she would never deny how happy she was at the idea of her Captain having someone take care of him and who he can take care of. “And hopefully he is clean.”
“Yeah no shit.” Levi smirked, he was glad the tension was broken. “Oh look I can see Glasses.” Levi said gesturing to the gleam of the last rays of the sun reflecting off the spectacles of the eccentric scientist. He could see the shadows of the rest of the reco team behind them, obviously not nearly as excited as the brunette.
“About time these two need some actual care.” Pertra sighed in relief, she was still worried about the two younger people they found and this way maybe able to finally get some real concrete information. “Now they will defiantly be able to survive now that Hanji is here. This means you have no choice but to actually accept responsibility for whoever that boy is in that room. That reminds me...” Petra got a devious look into those soft ember eyes.
“Don't you dare tell that crazy witch about this conversion.” Levi hissed coldly.
“Not a chance Captain, this is gold. Our baby is growing up .” With that Petra walked away with an obvious spring in her step. Levi ended up head butting the wall knowing that he screwed himself over by talking to someone about these kinds of thoughts. It was a small whimper that stopped Levi from further damaging the wall or his forehead. Levi knew instinctively where the whimper was coming from and walked back into the room where the boy was still sleeping, Levi couldn't wait until the kid's identity was confirmed so he would finally have a definite name. The kid was obviously having a nightmare; tears streaming down his face, eyes scrunched up, those ears flat against his head in distress, whimpers escaping his mouth, and the thrashing of trying to escape. Levi walked over to him and was overtaken by that suffocating force once again, a force that as soon as Levi noticed it was gone but still left Levi agitated at the boy's discomfort. As soon as Levi walked to the edge of the bed and sat down to stop the boy's thrashing the boy calmed until only the tears remained. Levi knew he had to wake the boy from his terror but the look of his large hand on the kid's too small and boney shoulder, he was obviously not a broad build like Levi but the kid was too small for his overall stature. It only took a few gentle shakes to wake the kid from sleep and only took a fluttering of those eyes to almost steal Levi's breath away. Those ocean eyes looked up at him in confusion and wonder.
“You are not a hallucination?” The kid asked with unfocused eyes and a quite voice.
“Nope I am alive and real contrary to the hopes of people like your father. Do you want to talk about the nightmare you were just having? I am not really good at this but you look like you need someone to talk to and I can at least listen. If not I can get Petra back in here, she is better at this kind of thing then me.”
“I would rather have you in here than someone else, I feel safe with you. And the dream was nothing, more of a memory. Father made all the hybrid experiments like me fight each other to weed out the weak and train us to kill our intended targets. There was about 50 of us originally in that particular 'program' if you can call it that. Only 5 of us made it to the last step. Me, the wolf and father's pride and joy regrettably, Ymir, the snake, Annie, the lioness, Reiner, the bear, and Bertold, who had the genes of a leopard seal. “ Levi knew this was good information to have, and if the kid was willing to share why these people were combined with the worlds deadliest animals then maybe the Scouts could prepare.
“You said you were being trained to kill your targets, I am assuming under Titan's command. Who were your targets?”
“Well that was the biggest problem. We were each trained to take out all of the members of your team including you. Only Annie and I were trained to fight against you because in theory our genes would give us the advantage. As I said I was Father's pride and joy and how well would it be for him if his top experiment let alone his son took out the leader of the biggest threat to Titan itself. “
“Eren, if you give me this information on recording and more information like this I can easily prove you and that girl out there need to be kept safe and with the Scouts. You need to give me a little more so I have leverage to use.” Levi pleaded. Eren nodded, secretly pleased Levi finally said his name, he was willing to expose every plan his father had to Levi. Levi pulled out a recorder he usually kept on him and gestured for Eren to start again from the beginning of his testimony.
“I was trained to fight not only your team and you though but the other hybrids in case something happened and they went rouge. I am so sorry Captain Levi.” With everything Eren said finally out he began to cry again, a weight was lifted that Levi knew the danger but another part of him sank knowing that he had no choice but to be a danger himself to the man sitting next of him. He had tried to resist it over the years and failed. “I didn't want to be trained like that, I don't want to hurt you or anyone. Father used one of his other experiments on me that rendered my basically a zombie while I was in training and now it is all instinct and muscle memory. It was completely against my will and yet here I am, being a danger to you even just sitting here. He wouldn't let me die no matter how much I tried.”
“Hey kid you are not a danger to me. You are sitting here telling me what is out there. We can learn from you and the girl out there how to fight against the others and hell you may even decide to fight with us instead of against us when the time comes. And to be honest, only once you are healthy, I would love a challenge in the sparing ring and you may be able to give me that.” The confident smirk on Levi's face made Eren's heart skip a beat. Levi was dangerous for Eren and Eren knew it. He would most likely fall in love with Levi, which wasn't a stretch he already was harboring a crush for the older man. Not only was he incredibly attractive with a low seductive voice but Levi was just Levi and held no pretenses or falsehood in front of Eren. Any image Eren's mom had put in his head about Levi was nothing compared to the real thing.
“I would like that. Getting healthy, living on base, sparring with you, fighting with you, that all sounds like a dream.” Eren gave his first real smile in over ten years and it was over something simple Levi thought nothing of.