Three Months Later
Kara was sitting on the couch, curled up with her favorite movie night blanket. It was faint, but it still smelled like Lena’s expensive perfume. Tears welled up in her already red, puffy eyes. Sobs overtook her body for the millionth time in the last few months. Since Lena’s death, Kara had completely shut down. No Catco, no Tower, no Supergirl. A knock on her door interrupted her thoughts, reminiscing of better times. Kara sighed. She didn’t need x-ray vision to know that it was probably Alex. Or Nia. They had both come over with pizza and potstickers multiple times trying to get her to live again. Or, at the very least get her to eat something. Alex had used her key several times to get into her sister’s apartment only to find her sister passed out on the floor from not eating anything for days.
“Kara, please just open up for a minute. I have to give you something.” The voice caught her off guard. It was Jess. She had heard from her right after it had happened, Jess offering her condolences. Then to help clean out Lena’s office, Sam coming into town to take over. Willing herself to get up, she dragged herself to the door, opening it to see her Lena’s assistant.
“I know you probably don’t want to see anyone right now,” Jess started, “But Ms. Luthor’s will was finally read after a small legal battle and she left this for you.” She held out an envelope. “It wasn’t opened, just scanned to make sure there was nothing dangerous, but the message is for you and your eyes only."
“Thanks,” Kara mumbled, taking the envelope and then shutting the door, retaking her spot on the couch. Opening the envelope, her breath hitched as she saw her name scrawled in Lena’s handwriting on a folded piece of paper. Unfolding it, she saw a handwritten letter.
Kara,
I know things have been rough between us lately, but if you have received this then it means I went against my brother, and paid the price for it. I overheard him and Lillian talking about keeping us apart, and I knew it was only a matter of time till he showed his true colors to the world.
When you first walked into my office almost four years ago, I knew there was something different about you. You looked at me like I was a real person, not a Luthor. During our whole friendship I kept thinking, if I could be Lena, just Lena, not a Luthor or the sister of a mass murderer, I could keep you close.
Tears splotched the sides of the paper as Kara read. That last line sounded so similar to what she told Lena nine months prior. She let a choked out sob as she read the next few lines.
When I found out about you, I immediately assumed what I had known my whole life. I knew I had feelings for you, but how could a Super ever love a Luthor like I love you? I have never felt this way about anybody before and the pain of what I perceived to be a con was too much. I should have talked to you, told you how I felt from the moment I met you. I always tended to push my feelings down, box them up till I forgot they existed. But with you, so many of those were opened and, to my surprise, I felt relieved and content with being able to share a few of those things with you. Until my feelings for you became so strong, right before he told me your truth. I experienced a feeling I had never felt before, and lashed out.
Your truth was always yours to share, I should’ve never expected you to share it with me. I heard what you said at the Pulitzer Party. I am happy you were able to open up like that to me, and angry that I was unable to do that myself. So, even though I was unable to tell you in person, I’m just going to come out and say it now:
Kara stopped reading, the tears becoming too much. She was so caught up in reading what Lena wrote for her, she didn’t hear the door open behind her, and Alex walked in. She saw her sister on the couch, and sat down next to her, noticing that she was reading something. Jess had called her to let her know about the letter, knowing the blonde would be needing someone tonight after reading it. Kara paid no notice to her sister, and just continued to read.
I love you, Kara Zor-El. You made me trust in people again, and opened me up to the prospect of happiness, one that I dismissed so many years prior. Being around you, it always made me feel like I had the world at my back, everyone supporting me. Like I could do anything. You were always there when I needed you the most, and I cannot even begin to thank you for that. I only ever hope that you may feel like I do. Like the world would completely come to a halt if I lost you. I can’t even begin to imagine what everyone went through who knew your secret when the Reign situation happened. Thinking about that now, about how you were beat into a coma, it makes me sick. Like I need to call you right after, need to hear your voice and hear that you are still here. I love you, for your dorky reporterness and you alien parts equally. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, the only truly good thing in my life. And I know that no matter what has happened or will happen, I will always love you with all of my heart.
Love, Now and Always,
Your Lena
Kara just sat there, tears streaming down her face. After ten minutes she looked up at Alex. Her sister just sighed, wrapping her arms around her.
“She felt the same.” Kara whispered into Alex’s shoulder, “She loved me the same way and I never even guessed it.”
“Lena always had a poker face,” Alex replied, her sister looking up at her again, “I for one never truly knew what she was thinking.”
“But you knew about this.” Kara said, brandishing the letter in her face.
“I had my suspicions, but then Lex happened and I thought it would be best not to say anything.” She said quietly, seeing her sister’s face turning from sadness to anger.
“You were wrong! I would never have given up on her, not if I knew that.” Kara shot up off the couch and turned to her sister. “I called her a villain, I roped her in with Lex and Lillian and I gave up on her.” Kara ended in a whisper, “I gave up on her.” She choked out, the tears overtaking her once again. Alex stood up and gave her sister another hug. Kara returned it and her shoulder became wet with tears.
“I miss her, I miss her so so much.” Kara said in between tears.
“I know, I miss her too.” Alex said, tears forming in her own eyes. They all did. And if any of them were going to get through this, they had to lean on each other. They were going to get through this.
Together.