The Glow

Anne still can't believe that she had told her life story to the queen. She can't believe that the queen was now officially her friend. She can't believe that somehow, in their sleep, the two started to snuggle against each other and were now embracing each other.

What Anne remembers is that she was cold, and after a bit of shuffling, she was warm. Actually, she's surprised that she woke up before the queen and is noticing all of this. She knows she should start getting ready, but she doesn't want to wake the older, as her arms are wrapped protectively around her. Well, actually.... 

"I'm not a child, Catherine. You don't have to protect me like I am one." At this remark, the Spaniard starts to stir, slowly waking up and realizing their current situation. Catherine quickly takes her arms back, allowing Anne to slip out of bed, who is laughing at how flustered the other is.

"Well I wouldn't have to if you didn't snuggle into me last night." The gold woman says, quickly regaining her normal composure. "Now be quiet, I'm going to pray."

"Alright."

With that, their mornings were rather normal, that is, without the added tension. Anne felt strangely lighter after having spilled all her feelings last night. She had no idea why she had started talking about what Henry did to her, about her life. What she did say about the queen was true, however. She didn't want Catherine to back down just because of some absurd vision. The brunette brought a challenge--something the French woman liked.

Thankfully, Henry wasn't at breakfast. The green woman doesn't think that she could handle seeing him just hours after being raped by the man. She doesn't see him as she does her tasks (under Jane's supervision). She doesn't see him at lunch. The lady in waiting does see him as she walks past his room. She hides behind the corner and watches as he walks inside. Soon followed by a certain queen.

It's now that Catherine's words last night fully sink in. And Anne can't help but feel sorry for the Spaniard. Not only has she been raped once before, Anne has no doubt that she's about to be right now. And that's not even considering the number of years they've been married. The number of years he could've hurt her...

Anne can't tell why she feels such a connection with this woman. They had been enemies from the start, and have only become friends for less than a day. Yet Anne had been compelled to share her history with the other. She felt like she didn't have a choice, but in a way it didn't feel forced. It wasn't like all those times she had been pushed by her father or other monarchs. It felt...safe.

She never felt completely safe around anyone like that before.

Ultimately, Anne decides to wait for the queen inside her chambers. She takes one of the few books in the room and reads it on their bed. She doesn't take in anything that's happening in the novel however, her mind awaiting the sound of the creaking door.

"Mary, I'm fine. I would just like to spend some time in my chambers. Alright?" Anne's eyes perk up at the familiar voice. From outside the door, she hears the mutters of a young child, and the sounds of footsteps, before finally hearing the scraping of the wooden door. "Anne. Didn't expect to see you here."

"How long has he been doing this to you?" The green woman's face holds no emotion, much like her tone. When a few seconds go by with no reply, Anne repeats herself. "How long has he been fucking you without your permission?" The other takes a sigh, hunching over.

"I don't even remember at this point. I suppose since we've been married." The younger scoffs.

"How? How have you handled years of abuse and not told anyone?" Anne feels anger rising to her face. If Henry is this abusive, and he ends up being Anne's soulmate, then she'd rather spent the rest of her days alone. Not to mention that Catherine is the first and most mistreated victim of his actions. It makes the French woman sick.

"What happens between the king and queen isn't anyone's business. Plus, I didn't want to bother anyone--"

"That doesn't give you an excuse to bottle up your emotions like that! Even when I was in France, I vented to the others there." In the back of her mind, the darker voices in her head want to remind Anne of their annoyance and dismissal. Though, the newest addition to the English court does her best to ignore them. Catherine is who she needs to focus on. "And when I talked to you last night, I felt....safer. I felt like you really understood, and....cared." She glances at the queen, who still standing in front of the bed. "Unless I'm reading it wrong."

"No, no. I did care. Do! I just, don't talk about myself."

"Is that really the best you could come up with? I told you my life story before we officially became friends. Sit."

The gold woman is reluctant, but slowly makes her way to the bed, not rolling back her shoulders to her normal, more confident, position. She takes a seat in front of Anne. Catherine didn't expect to see a different side to the other, much less a strict but caring one.

"Good. Didn't expect the queen to comply to a mere servant." Anne can tell the smirk on Catherine's face is forced. She isn't dense (like someone). "Start from the beginning, just like I did."

"You didn't start from the beginning, but I suppose it's to make up for keeping my mouth shut all these years?" Anne nods. "You're impossible."

"How can I not be?" Both girls chuckle slightly at this. "Now stop stalling."

"Alright, alright. Okay.....I was still a teenager when I was shipped over from Spain to marry prince Arthur. Henry's brother. Arthur had been...nicer, to say the least. Kinder. But then he died, and because people treat women terribly these days, I was imprisoned. I couldn't contact any of my family members, and I hadn't made any friends yet. No one tried to reach out to me. I just felt...alone.....and unwanted. And then Henry was to be king, and he went through all this trouble to be able to marry me and suddenly I felt wanted again."

"Catherine, breathe." The brunette shakily inhales and exhales, with the black-haired woman's guidance. "Okay. Can you continue?" After a nod, Anne listens intently to Catherine's words. Just like the latter did to her.

"So, I felt wanted. We got married. I was hoping our Glow would happen right then, but like most cases, it didn't. So I waited. I didn't want to lose that feeling after it had been taken away from me. When he first made love to me without permission, I was still new to the palace. Jane and I had started to become closer, but I didn't want to seem weak. I don't want to be weak. I'm the queen after all. I need to maintain that image."

"It's okay for your walls to fall down. If they fall and you give up, that's what makes you weak. If they fall and you get back up, that makes you strong." Catherine's eyes widen in shock. She didn't think this girl was capable of saying anything so wise. "My brother told me that a long time ago. He's still alive, but I haven't seen him in a while."

"That's actually, really smart."

"I'm not an airhead, you know. I read." When the Spaniard smirks, the French can tell that it's real this time. See? Working already. 

"I never said you were. Okay. When it had gotten to about three years of marriage, he started to grow distant. Mary had just been born, and our Glow still hadn't shown up. So, from then until your arrival, he's had three mistresses. And each time, I wouldn't say anything, because I thought that deep down he still cared. That he still wanted me."

Anne remembers the letter her sister wrote to her when she was one of those mistresses. She remembers reading how the king didn't care for his wife. How he only payed attention to her when she made herself seen.

It's all disgusting.

"Clearly that's not the case if he's this ecstatic about you."

"He's just getting his hopes up too high. At this point, I'm not sure I want Henry to be my soulmate."

"You and me both, Anne. But, it's not like we have a choice." There's a moment of somewhat comfortable silence. Silence that doesn't hurt. Silence that's safe. Safe with each other. A feeling that doesn't come often in these times.

"I hope you feel better, Catalina." Catherine's breath hitches. "I'm sorry, did I say something?" Anne starts panicking. She doesn't want to lose this person who actually cares about her. And that's a lot coming from a friend of one day.

"It's just...my mother used to call me that. Could you not call me that? For right now, at least." The green woman nods quickly, glad her little slip up didn't completely destroy their new friendship. "And to answer your question, yes. Surprisingly, I do feel better. Is it just me, or does it feel....safe..here?"

"No, it's quite strange. It feels comfortable. Is this true friendship?"

"Perhaps it is, Anne Boleyn. Perhaps it is."

~     ~     ~

Mary feels really bad that she's spying on both her mother and Miss Boleyn so much. But curiosity is what drives her. And what happened today fuels her to do more research on Glows.

Something about what the two had said triggered something in her mind. Comfort. Friendship. Safety. It just feels like something is missing. Mary has this feeling that they all add up to the Glow. A common topic, she noticed, between Catherine and Anne. She also sensed some type of reluctance whenever they mentioned her father.

"Ah. Here it is. Your soulmate is the one who will treat you the best. Make you feel loved, wanted, seen, etc. It is possible that these feelings may occur even before your Glowing. The most common pre-Glow feeling is the sensation of feeling comfortable and safe with this specific person....."

Now that didn't make sense. Nowhere does it say that two people of the same gender could be soulmates. Though, it doesn't say that is couldn't happen. This makes Mary a bit relieved. That is, before she's reminded of the world she lives in. Men couldn't be with men. Women couldn't be with women.

But why should one be punished for who they love? And why should one be punished if their soulmate was of the same sex? None of it makes sense. But now, Mary's mission is complete. She figured the two out. Well, she had a pretty solid theory.

Catherine of Aragon and Anne Boleyn are soulmates.