“Tommy! What the FUCK was that?!” Dina would yell as she left Ellie in the kitchen, holding JJ. Ellie stared silently at the red circle on the map. Was Tommy right..?
Dina practically chased Tommy away with a broom and slowly walked back into the house, letting out a heavy sigh of relief.
“Man.. I can’t fucking believe he did that. Come on, put that silly map away.” Dina said with a small smile, taking JJ from Ellie’s lap. The taller one stayed still for a few moments that seemed like hours. Ellie slowly looked up at Dina from the kitchen table, her face giving away her emotions immediately. She was torn apart.
“Dina.. what if Tommy is right? She got off completely unharmed. It’s not fair..!” Ellie gritted her teeth, her eyebrows drawn together in contemplation and frustration.
“He’s not! And you know he isn’t.” Dina knew that last part was a lie, she honestly could never read Ellie’s emotions. She crumpled up the map and tossed it, heading up the stairs. “Can you please come help me put JJ to bed..? You know he likes when you play that song on the guitar.”
“Yeah..” Ellie mumbled, joining the two up the stairs a moment later. Once in their room, Dina sat on the edge of the bed, rocking JJ in her arms. Ellie grabbed her guitar, sitting on a tall stool and began to strum the strings.
“If I lost you.. I would surely lose myself.” Ellie sung slowly, her voice light and heavy with emotion all at the same time. It hurt to sing this song, but it was one of the only things that would connect her with Joel.
“Everything I have found here, I’ve not found by myself.. try and sometimes you’ll succeed, to make this man of me.” JJ yawned, smiling with pure glee as he stared at Ellie intently.
“All my stolen parts, I’ve no need for anymore..” Ellie glanced up from her guitar to see JJ quietly snoring in her girlfriend’s arms. She stood up slowly, putting the guitar back in it’s heavy, leather case. As if they could communicate silently to not make a noise, Dina stood up and carefully laid JJ in his crib, putting his favorite blanket over him. She stood and turned to Ellie, a reassuring smile on her face. “Hey, you made the right choice, okay?”
Ellie nodded slowly, as if she was unsure. Dina pulled her into a tight hug, wrapping her arms around the other’s neck. They stood for a few moments in silence, appreciating each other’s company before Dina pulled away. “C’mon, it’s late. We should head to bed too, ya big baby..!” She said with a laugh, punching Ellie’s arm gently.
Ellie rolled her eyes with a small laugh, nodding before punching Dina in the same place.
———————————————————
Ellie ran down the stairs, listening to Joel’s calls for help. She screamed his name, pushing into the locked door. The door suddenly opened and she was tackled to the ground, a heavy man pushing her face into the ground.
“Please! Stop! Let him go!” Ellie screamed desperately, staring at Joel laying pathetically on the ground. “I’m going to fucking kill you!” She threatened, her eyes wide with fear and anger. Tears streamed down her face. There was a loud thud as the tall woman swung the club one more time, Joel letting out a groan before finally laying still again. The young girl screamed profanities and threats, begging Joel to stand up again. “JOEL! Fucking stand up! open your goddamn eyes! Please..!”
Ellie bolted upright in bed, breathing heavily as tears streamed down her face.
“Joel..” She mumbled, climbing out of the bed silently to not wake up her girlfriend and their son. She closed every window in the house to stop the cold from coming in. Finally, she opened their closet, pulling out her old bag. Ellie took it with her into the kitchen, digging through the cabinets and throwing whatever gun she could find into her bag.
“Hey..” A voice said slowly from above her, causing Ellie to look up at the source. She stood up slowly, adjusting Joel’s old jacket on her small body.
“Hey.”
“Come back to bed.. we can talk about it in the morning, okay?” Dina said reassuringly, turning to head back up the stairs.
“I have to finish it.” Ellie mumbled under her breath, looking ashamed of herself. Dina stopped in her tracks immediately, frowning deeply as she turned to face the love of her life again.
“You don’t owe Tommy shit!” Dina put her hands on her hips, getting frustrated and desperate. She slowly approached her lover, wanting to convince her out of it.
“I don’t sleep. I don’t eat. I’m-.. I’m not able to just forget like you Dina.” Ellie glanced at her bag and then at Dina.
“What? You think this is easy? For you and for him, I deal with it..!”
“I love you—“
“Prove it!” The other raised her voice slightly, desperation covering her like a mask. “Stay.” She whispered, a tear running down her face. Ellie was silent, staring down at her feet like they would give her the guidance she desperately needed. She closed her eyes, when she opened them again she looked into Dina’s eyes.
“I can’t.” She mumbled, shaking her head slowly. Her bright eyes now dull and confused with hurt.
Dina was frustrated. “So, what? I’m supposed to sit here and wait for you, for god knows how long, just thinking you’re fucking dead the entire time?”
“I don’t plan on dying.” Ellie interrupted.
“Yeah, well, neither did Jesse. Or Joel.”
She said firmly, moving to stand just a few inches in front of her broken lover. Ellie was fed up. She reached down and went to grab her bag, immediately being stopped. Dina placed her hands on either side of Ellie’s face, pushing her close against the wall.
“Hey, stop. Hey. Hey, come on.” Dina said with desperation, her eyes filled with hurt. She paused, staring at Ellie. “We’ve got a family. She doesn’t get to be more important than that.” She stroked Ellie’s cheek with her thumb gently, rocking them back and forth gently. Ellie slowly reached her hand up, holding Dina’s wrist. She slowly began to slide it off of her.
“No..!” Dina whimpered, pressing their foreheads together. She pulled away from Ellie, as if giving up and turned her back to the other. She held the bridge of her nose, eyebrows drawn together as she fought back the tears. “I’m not gonna do this again.” She mumbled firmly, almost as if to herself. Ellie stared at her back, hurt and confused.
“That’s up to you.” Ellie lifted her bag and walked out of the farm house that they dreamed of together, the door slamming behind her.
——————1 MONTH LATER—————
Dina headed into Jackson, her once bright eyes dulled with sadness as she gave up on Ellie’s return. She met Maria in her office, sitting down across from the older woman with JJ bouncing quietly in her lap.
“Dina- please. Just think about this. You dreamed of that house with Ellie.. don’t give up on her. Please.”
“I can’t. It’s too painful, and I’m not just going to sit and wait for someone who might be dead!” Dina said firmly, her eyes narrowing as she spat the last part out, almost immediately regretting her words.
Maria sighed, leaning back in her wooden chair. She sat still for a while, unsure of how to stop Dina.
“Even if Ellie wasn’t going to come back, there’s no open houses. I’m sorry. Please reconsider.” Mara tried to reassure her, sitting up and placing her arms on the table. “Look, just give her a few more months. I know it’s hard. But, please. Ellie needs you more than anyone.”
“If she needed me that much, then she wouldn’t have left me..!” She wiped her teary eyes, standing up from her seat, pushing it back into the table with her foot. “Fine. Three months. That’s it.” Dina stormed out of the building, heading back to her farm.
-SANTA BARBRA, AFTER ABBY LEFT WITH LEV-
Ellie sat in the water miserably, her knees up to her chest as she stared down at her mutilated hand. She sat there for a long time, and even though her head was far above the water, she felt like she was drowning.
“Joel.. I’m sorry.” She whispered to herself, standing up as water dripped off of her. She got in the only boat left and started it, miserably driving off. The broken girl felt as though she was worse than before. She sat with her head in her hands, thinking about her return.
————TWO MONTHS LATER————
Ellie had finally reached land, she knew where she was and she knew she was close to Jackson. She abandoned the boat and walked on foot, stumbling over herself. After the branch on that tree stabbed a hole in her stomach, the trip only made the infection worse. She stumbled, tripping over a branch and fell, breathing heavily. She slowly lifted her blood stained tank top and grimaced as she saw the makeshift stitches. It was badly infected, the surrounding skin was purple and bruised with discharge leaking from the wound. “Fuck.” She mumbled, slowly standing on her feet again.
She navigated the woods, using trees as leverage to help her stand upright. Ellie groaned in pain, the hole in her stomach starting to bleed again. She took a break, leaning her forehead against a tall tree.
“Dina.” She said, suddenly gaining all of her energy again when she glanced through the woods and glimpsed at their farm.
Although the farm was relatively close, it took close to an hour before she even reached the front door. Ellie was exhausted. She barely had energy to raise her fist to knock on the door before collapsing. She fainted, extremely unhealthy from the long trip and little to no food being around. She laid on the porch silently, her chest barely rising and falling before the door whipped open.
“Who the fuck is here at this time-... Ellie.” Dina hyperventilated, unsure if this was some kind of trick as she knelt down next to her. Ellie opened her eyes, smiling slightly as she looked up at her girlfriend.
“Hey.” She mumbled before closing her eyes again.