So, So, So Stupid
“Son Hyejoo! Hyejoooo!” Yerim yelled loudly across the street, throwing her arms up in the air in an attempt to somehow stretch her vocal chords to try to reach the ears of the girl across the street, but to no avail.
Yerim huffed, before looking into the road for a second, and doggedly running across the empty road, almost flattening the black-clad girl who was too busy looking at her phone and listening to her loud lo fi music to see or hear the flurry of purple and neon dashing towards her.
“Jesus Christ Yerim! Look out next time you’re failing about!” Hyejoo basically yelled, barely catching Yerim as she fell face first towards the ground.
“Sorry Hyejoo! I didn’t want to get run over...” Yerim giggled, her cheeks flushing a light red as she realised she was being firmly held in her best friends arms. Hyejoo rolled her eyes good naturedly and as Yerim untangled herself from their embrace as the duo walked the rest of the journey to school, Yerim, face still flushed red, began animately talking about a recent kpop group she had gotten into, oh my girl, in an attempt to distract her mind.
Yerim decided to pretend to herself all the adrenaline that was currently running through her body was from running across the road, rather than practically falling into her best friend's arms.
Yerim practically bounced over to her and Hyejoo’s table. She placed her lunch try next to Hyejoo and swung her legs over the bench. Yerim could not stop smiling today. Well, to be fair, she was usually smiling, but today was different. Yerim let out a slightly shaky breath as she prepared herself to finally ask the question that she had wanted to ask Hyejoo since the week they met. Do you, maybe, want to go on a date?
“Hyejoo…” Yerim turned to her best friend and felt her smile slip off her face as she followed the direction that Hyejoo was looking at. Park Chaewon. Of course. Bloody perfect Park Chaewon. Yerim didn’t even know why she was surprised.
She had caught Hyejoo staring at the blonde on more than one occasion. She usually thought nothing of it but now it was blatantly obvious, staring her in the face. It was the way Hyejoo was looking at Chaewon. A look Yerim knew all too well. It was the way she looked at Hyejoo.
“Hm?” Hyejoo mumbled, not even turning her head to answer Yerim. Yerim felt her smile slip even more, a small, sad frown now on her face. She was so, so, so stupid. Why did she ever do this to herself?
“Oh.. uh, nothing! Nevermind!” Yerim said, a bright, fake smile coating her features like a veil.
This time Hyejoo took the time to actually tear her eyes away from her not so subtle crush to face her best friend of 5 years. “What? You sure?” She asked, oblivious concern lacing her voice.
“Yuh hu!” Yerim smiled even wider, her heart shattering even more as she looked over the face she loved so much. Hyejoo gave a small, slightly concerned nod before returning her gaze to Chaewon. Yerim’s smile dropped as she looked at her lunch. She was well and truly screwed.
Hyejoo and Yerim walked back home, Hyejoo seemingly lost in thought and Yerim staring decisively at the ground, teeth gritted and jaw clenched, trying to bury all her feelings for her best friend that she foolishly accumulated over the years of their friendship.
“Yerimmie?” Yerim looked up from her trained gaze on the pavement as her eyes met Hyejoos. Yerim let her heart flutter for a second before decisively shutting it down before answering with an impassive
“Yes?”
Hyejoo didn’t seem to notice Yerim’s stoic expression, as she took a deep breath before continuing.
“You- you know Park Chaewon?” Hyejoo whispered, her eyes dropping to the ground, cheeks flushed.
Yerim cleared her throat, plastered a smile on her face and answered “Yeah, I know her. We’re in the newspaper club together.”
Momentary surprise crossed her face, and an involuntary “oh yeah!” was blurted out. Yerim smiled at this. It was one of the many things she found absolutely adorable about Hyejoo. And Yerim found everything about Hyejoo adorable. So, for Hyejoo, she would bottle down her feelings.
“Well.. i kind of have a crush on her…” Hyejoo exhaled, her eyes meeting Yerim’s for a moment. Yerim smiled in response, and although the brunette didn’t pick up on it, it was laced with sadness. “You aren’t angry? Or disgusted?” Hyejoo asked, her eyes twitching in confusion.
Yerim’s eyes widened in surprise. “What? Why would you think that?” She sounded hurt.
“Oh god! I’m sorry, it’s just… you know… a lot of kids in this area aren’t exactly allies.” Hyejoo panicked, grabbing hold on Yerim’s hand, unknowing causing the older girl to want to melt into a puddle on the floor.
“Uh, it’s okay. But oh my god!! I’m so happy for you!” Yerim plastered another fake smile across her face. “How did you know?” Yerim decided she was going to be the most supportive, bestest best friend ever! Because that’s what friends do. And that’s all they would ever be.
“Oh. Uh, this is kind of embarrassing. Don’t tell anyone, okay? I, um, met her on minecraft. We- we’re minecraft girlfriends.”
Oh. They were already dating. Of course they were. God. Yerim felt even the tiniest bit of hope she had left float into thin air. “Oh my god! That’s so adorable!” Yerim yelled, pulling Hyejoo into a hug so she wouldn’t see her face of despair. “Tell me what happened!”
Why do you do this to yourself, Choi Yerim?
As Yerim dropped Hyejoo off, she mentally prepared herself for hanging out with Chaewon. It wasn’t that she disliked Chaewon. They were very similar actually, in their own way. They were both positive, happy, and generally nice people. But where Yerim was loud, Chaewon was quiet. Where Yerim was extroverted, Chaewon was most definitely introverted. While Yerim liked girls, Chaewon appeared to be one of the straightest girls yerim had ever met.
Apparently though, that wasn’t the case.