El’s heart felt like it was pounding out of her chest when they sat side to side on Max’s bed.
It had been one of their normal sleepovers. They painted each other’s nails, watched a few movies in the living room, danced to music, did make up, and read some comics. She thinks that’s what happened, at least. Truth be told, she was really distracted today. Every time Max had smiled or laughed she’s pretty sure her heart couldn’t race fast enough. Just the thought or very look of the other girl made her feel light headed with pure fondness.
Now they were just leaning on top of each other with no other thoughts in the world. At least Max was. El was too busy thinking. Thinking about confessing about how she was in love with the sweetest person in the world. Thinking about Mike’s advice, to just say it fast and get it done with. Thinking about how it could go terribly wrong so fast.
El thinks she’s been through a fair amount of stuff. From the lab and the constant fighting she had to do with monsters, she has seen it all. Felt it all. Scared, hopeless, helpless, overjoyed, flattered, and nervous. But this feeling was new. It was a pounding in her chest she couldn’t ignore. It was smiles that included teeth and eyes that had happy tears. It was terrifying. It wasn’t scary for your life or for the future, it was scary for the sole reason you couldn’t control it.
She felt soft hands go through her wavy hair and she looked up to see Max casually playing with it while peacefully laying there. The action made El want to squeal with delight because she’s playing with my hair!! It felt natural to have the red head’s hands there and she felt warm and safe knowing there is someone like Max beside her.
“You seem distracted. You okay?”, a concerned Max spoke softly. She didn’t look down on El like she was a lost puppy or a fussy baby, she stayed where she was and trusted El to respond on her own. Oh gosh, she has it bad for the girl. Really bad. El reached up and grabbed one of her hands for comfort, the other one however remained on her head. “Max, can I tell you a secret?”. She was going to tell her like Mike said too. Say it straight forward and give her a second to respond.
El didn’t understand why she was listening to Mike’s advice when he didn’t even ask Will out yet, but she only trusted him with the dark secrets of her mind. He was the one there for her since day one in the woods, and he will continue to be. It helps that they are both ‘whipped’ (his words) for their best friends, and he got it. Now; however, she wouldn't consider Will and Max their best friends more like their crushes (she learned that word recently). Which means that they are each other’s best friends and El likes that more.
Max sat up and kept hold of El’s hand while facing her. “Of course. Anything.”. The words were on El tongue, practically ready to spill out and tell her everything that she kept in for a long time. I am in love with you, Max. Something like that. The things that were held back were about to flood the room but as soon as she was going to speak, she made a mistake. El made eye contact.
Those bright blue crystal eyes poured into her own and her cheeks blazed a bright red from the continuous skin contact from their hands. Max was everywhere and nowhere all at once. Every painting and every piece of candy yelled out Max, yet when she closed her eyes and nothing was there, someone was. The girl across from her. The one that was making her heat up and want to giggle and throw up all at once.
Max scooted closer and grabbed onto El’s other hand, “If you don’t want to tell me, it’s okay.”. Her face read true patience and El wanted to freak out even more. Why was she so understanding and sweet? It did not help her case at all. “I-”, what was she supposed to say? The words left her brain and she didn’t know what to do. How do you express that you love someone without saying? El has never been good at words. Barely used to hear them from people, let alone speak ‘em. “I want to tell you, Max. Really bad but”, she shook her head, “I don’t know how.”. She sounded desperate because she was. How could El mess this up? Her and Mike even practiced before she came here.
“Well don’t say it then. Show it.”, Max said simply. Her face was much closer than before and El panicked. What do you do here? Normally you kiss but in the movies they never show two girls. Never ever. Is she supposed to hit her in the face? In the movies two girls fight, but her and Max don’t.
No!! Don’t hit Max.
In a scared moment El slapped her on the face. Not really hard, as light as she could, but it didn’t feel right. Max looked at her in complete disbelief and held her cheek. On no. The girl didn’t look angry or mad, just..upset? Hurt feelings. “What the hell, El?”, Max asked in the calmest voice ever and El felt more guilty. She did what the movies did and it’s not working. That how her and Mike’s relationship worked-
Oh yeah. They aren’t together anymore either. Not the best idea then to follow the movies.
Oops
“I- I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to! It- just- the movies, Max. I don’t know how else to show that I like you!”, once that came out, the floodgates opened. “When I’m around you my heart beats funny. It beats extra hard and fast, but it's not bad. I like it. I like being around you a lot, Max. My heart knows it and I know it, and even Mike knows it! I was scared because the movies don't show it and the movies are what I really know. I don’t know how to tell someone I love them with me meaning it. You make me happy and excited to see you every single day. I’m scared you don’t feel that way and me and Mike should’ve practiced more!”.
El let out a big breath and looked at Max who was completely still and silent. She didn’t make any faces, no noises, and let her hand down on the blanket. The room was quiet but El could hear her heartbeat pounding harder and harder. She hates me, was all she could think in her brain. I did something bad. Something really bad. Girls can’t like each other. Max hates me.
Then in just a second Max seized forward and planted a kiss on her lips. It was a small kiss but it made El light headed because of the sweetness of it. Her lips were soft and had cherry chapstick on them. They weren’t like Mike’s which were chapped and had no sweetness to them. They were different and better. They were sweet. Max pulled away immediately and looked at her, with a cautious face. El didn’t like when Max was nervous because it made her nervous, too. But! Max! Just! Kissed! Her!
“Was that”, Max breathed out, “okay?”. She nodded eagerly and couldn’t contain her excitement to the point where her hand was even wiggling around. “Very okay”, she pushed forward to kiss the girl again. When her lips were on the other’s, it was instantly returned with the motion. Instead of it being a loveless kiss, she felt something there. She felt something real and genuine. She felt the happiness and sweetness of candy, fireworks, and ice cream on hot summer days.
Max pulled away to smile at El, who was blushing profoundly. The redhead grabbed her hand and put El’s hand on her heart. “That’s how you can show what you feel.”. Max’s heart was going fast and she nodded. Max got it. Max felt what she did. She wasn’t alone. “So, you like me too?”, she asked, needing reassurance. The other girl let out a small laugh, “Yes. So much. You have no clue.”
El couldn't hold back her happiness and tackled her in a hug. Max fell back and began laughing as she held on tight to El’s waist. The brunette joined in laughing and she felt so loved and full of giggles she couldn't stop it. Max likes her back! Their laughter filled the room and El couldn't remember the last time she felt this much joy.
They stopped after a few minutes and she gently laid her head on the other girl's chest. She heard the heart beats and continued to listen to them, as she calmed her breathing down from the laughing. Listening to them was like a lullaby she never heard. It was perfect.
~
The next morning as they laid side to side holding hands, El yawned but couldn’t stop looking at Max’s face. “Why are you looking at me?”, the other girl said, her face almost the same shade as his hair. El leaned forward and gave her a soft kiss on the nose. “Because I can.”. Max rolled her eyes but El could tell her face was now definitely the same shade as her head.
“Are you hungry?”, she asked El. She shook her head no, she is but she doesn't want to get up yet. She wants to stay here with her girlfriend. Girlfriend? Yes, girlfriend. Max explained they can’t say it around other people, only each other. They had to be super careful because people get angry about it. She doesn’t know why, but they do.
“I don’t know why Mike doesn’t just tell Will he likes him. Then they can cuddle and kiss and stuff.”, El says, nonchalantly. Max widened her eyes in surprise. “What?”. Confused, El kept talking. “Yeah. He likes Will how I like you.”. She laid there confused then it hit her. “Oh no! I wasn’t supposed to tell you that was I? Mike is going to be mad. Pretend like you didn’t hear it.”. Max still looked surprised, “Holy shit. Wheeler likes Will? As in Will Byers? Used to have a bowl cut?”
“My step-brother, Will. But you can’t tell Mike I told you!”
“I won’t, but we have to do something about it.”
“We do?”
Max sat up and looked at El. “Yes! We could like set them up on a date without either knowing! El, we could totally get them to be boyfriends!”
“But what if Will doesn’t like him back.”
“Pft- El. Darling, Will literally stares heart eyes at him all day. If he didn’t like him, that would be the biggest surprise yet.”
“Darling?”, El asked, her face heating up at the name.
“I- uh. Did I say Darling?”
El sat up and giggled, “Mhm.”
“I can stop that if you want. I mean i-if you mind or something.”
El got off the bed and went around to give Max a soft kiss. “I don’t mind.”
Max got up and kissed her on the head, “Okay, darling.” She grinned and El had to mirror it. “We can set them up later?”
“Of course.”