Jane Seymour
In her past life, Jane Seymour was bound to observe and serve.
That was just how it went. Henry was nice and caring at the beginning. Jane truly thought she was in love.
But as Boleyn was beheaded, and the pressure for an heir increased, so too did Henry’s temper. He never hit her. No, Henry was too desperate for a wife who could possibly provide an heir to do that.
Rather, he criticized every little mistake Jane made. Yelled and screamed.
If there were no mistakes, Henry was sweet to her. Lavishing her with gifts of jewelry and expensive trinkets. Promises of a wonderful life by his side.
But the rage always came back eventually.
It only stopped when Jane became pregnant. Then, Henry became the doting husband Jane originally thought she had gained.
But the damage had already been done.
Now, everything Jane did wrong was filled with anxiety that someone would scream at her. But no one in this new life did such a thing. Instead, they playfully scolded her for apologizing and helped her fix whatever mistake had been made.
And Jane started to get better. She apologized less. She became more outspoken, joking with and teasing the other queens.
None of the other queens asked questions as to why there were so many anxious apologies. They had their own secrets and they would let Jane keep hers hidden until she wanted to reveal them.
Jane thought she was getting better. But then one nightmare seemed to pull her back to where she started.
~~||~~||~~
Jane wasn’t sure what she had done this time. But she was crouched on the floor, a mess staining the carpeted flooring.
Henry was standing tall above her. He was ranting angrily.
“Can you ever do anything right?!”
“Henry please—!”
“Honestly! You are always doing something stupid, you idiot!”
This went on for several very long minutes. Countless words and curses flying out of the furious king’s mouth.
“I promise you it will not happen again.” Jane finally whispered as Henry paused his rants to take a breath.
“Make sure of it. I wouldn’t want you to end up like that Boleyn girl. Now clean this up!” Henry growled as he stalked off, leaving Jane behind, sobbing on the floor.
~~||~~||~~
Jane cried herself awake. Just like in the dream, tears were falling down her cheeks.
She took deep breaths, struggling to calm her racing heart.
Up until this point, Jane had only one other nightmare about Henry’s rage. That was back when they were first reincarnated. Every other nightmare she had until now was dreams of the future she could have had, should she had lived. Dreams of her baby boy growing up with his mother still there. It had been a while since she even thought about one of Henry’s rages.
But this dream, it seemed to overpower every rational thought Jane has as she fought to calm herself down.
Henry would appear and scream for a mistake any second. Perhaps one of the other queens would take his place.
Jane quickly shook her head trying to snap herself away from that train of thought. But still, the thought lingered.
Perhaps she simply needed to start her day. It wasn’t too early.
So she got out of bed and put on her day clothes before heading down the hall, setting straight to work.
Soon, she had all of her morning chores completed. She started the pot of coffee for everyone, wiped down the kitchen, dusted the living room, and even had time to organize the bookshelf in the living room’s corner.
But even after everything was completed, none of the other queens had awoken.
So Jane grabbed her favorite book from the bookshelf and settled into the couch.
As she flicked through pages, faintly registering the words, a sleepy haze seemed to overcome her. Soon enough, the book dropped to the side, and Jane fell into sleep.
~~||~~||~~
When Catherine came downstairs, she knew Jane would probably be awake. Almost every morning, the other queen was awake by the time Catherine awoke.
So she wasn’t surprised to see Jane on the couch.
But she was surprised to see her asleep. Asleep and crying.
Tears were falling down Jane’s cheeks, causing a flame of worry to spark in Catherine’s heart.
“Jane?” Catherine asked gently as she sat next to the woman, placing a hand on Jane’s shoulder.
Jane woke with a start, a sort of sobbing noise bubbling from her throat. She squinted through her tears at Catherine.
“Catherine?” She mumbled.
“That’s right, Paloma.” Catherine said. “What happened?”
Jane seemed to break down further. This was the first time someone had caught her in the middle of one of these dreams. No one had ever asked about the life she dreamed of.
Catherine froze slightly as Jane cried almost silently. She gently reached a hand over and placed it on Jane’s shoulder. The silver queen leaned into the touch.
“I dreamed of Edward.” Jane eventually sobbed out. “What life could have been.”
Oh.
Catherine took a deep breath. She has had that same dream before with her Mary.
“I understand.” Catherine said slowly. “I have had that exact dream.”
“Does it hurt you too?” Jane asked, looking up to meet Catherine’s eyes.
Catherine’s gaze softened as she fully took in the tear streaked face. “My heart aches are not just phantom pains, Paloma.”
“There was so much I dreamed of.” Jane confessed. Catherine grabbed a tissue from the box on the table and handed it to Jane, who began wiping her tears.
“So much that there could’ve been.” Catherine finished. She looked to the side as she continued. “But we can't go back. We can only move forward.”
“That won’t stop memories.” Jane objected, shaking her head.
“No. It won’t.” Catherine agreed with a hum. “But we can make ourselves new dreams. New families.”
“I have the five of you as a family.” Jane said, but her smile didn’t fully meet her eyes as she continued. “But you never forget your child.”
“You can never forget your child.” Catherine repeated solemnly, nodding in agreement with her eyes holding a wistful gaze.
Jane hummed her agreement before speaking again.
“Thank you, Catalina.”
Catherine paused for a moment before chuckling fondly. The moment Anne began calling her by her real name, she knew the others wouldn’t be far behind. She was honestly surprised it took this long for another queen to start using that name.
“Of course, Paloma.”
~~||~~||~~
Later in the morning, after Jane’s tears had fully dried and both women found their composure, Anna had come down the stairs, bidding the two queens farewell as she set out for her morning run.
Minutes after that, Anne came racing down the stairs. She halted behind the couch, beaming at the two staring queens.
“Who wants to help me make pancakes?!” Anne said excitedly, bypassing any greetings.
“I’ll pass.” Catherine said, but her smile betrayed her dry tone.
“I can.” Jane agreed as she stood, her own smile on her face. Anne beamed right back and she trotted to the kitchen, Jane following in her steps.
“Usually Kat and Cathy are up before you are.” Jane started a conversation as she pulled down the pancake mix.
“Chaton had a bad night last night. She’s with Cathy right now. I wanted to let them sleep longer.” Anne explained, a sad smile on her face as she grabbed the eggs and milk. “That’s also why I wanted to make pancakes for them!”
“Wonderful idea.” Jane said happily. “I’m sure they’ll enjoy the pancakes.”
Anne grinned at Jane and shrugged. “That’s what I’m hoping for! We’ll have pancakes and everyone will be cheered up, Chaton especially!”
“And you’ll take your medicine at breakfast too?” Jane asked gently. These small reminders were normal for the silver queen, and they weren’t purely directed at Anne. Every queen was asked small questions by Jane almost daily.
“I always do, Mère!” Anne said with a smirk, striding over to the cabinets and pulling the bottle down. She placed it on the kitchen table before making her way back to Jane and hopping to sit up on the counter, next to the oven.
Jane gave her an unimpressed, yet amused, look and Anne simply grinned right back, swinging her legs slightly.
Several seconds passed before Jane noticed something was wrong with the batter.
It was far more puffy than it should have been. She frowned and after it cooked and cooled, she took a bite. It tasted almost chalky.
Anne also took a bite and began looking over the ingredients list and measuring cups. “Merde… Too much baking powder.”
Then, Anne heard footsteps. She glanced behind her and saw that Jane was the source.
She had begun pacing and glancing at the door, almost as if waiting for someone to burst in.
Unknown to Anne, she was doing exactly that. She was waiting for Henry to come in and howl at her mistake. Just like in her nightmare. She had made a mistake and Henry would come barging in again. If not him someone else would. Perhaps Anne would turn around and begin scolding her—
But a body blocked her from her pacing and took a gentle hold of her hands, which had been entwining together rapidly from anxiety.
Jane’s mind focused and she found Anne standing in front of her.
“Hey, Jane, it’s okay. It’s just a little extra baking powder. We can make another batch and try again.”
“What?” Jane was clearly confused. Where was the screaming?
“We can make another batch.” Anne stated, tilting her head slightly.
There was several seconds of silence.
“Why aren’t you angry?” Jane practically whispered.
There was silence for several seconds as Anne regarded Jane.
“Remember that time Lina and I baked everyone a cake?” Anne eventually asked.
“Yes?”
“Well, I originally tried to make it on my own. I got distracted by something and it got completely burnt! Smoke and everything!” Anne explained with a laugh. It wasn’t funny at the time but now she looked back and thought it was kinda funny. “Lina came down and had to help me clean up everything and also bake a new one.”
Jane seemed to understand why she was being told this story, but she didn’t speak up, prompting Anne to continue.
“Point is, everyone makes mistakes.” Anne elaborated, giving Jane a smile as she pulled the pan off the burner. “I’m not gonna get angry over something I easily could have done myself!”
“I… really?” Jane blinked almost owlishly.
“Yep! Help me make a new batch?” Anne asked simply as she pulled out the extra mix they had.
Jane didn’t respond, instead making her way over and pulling out another bowl from the cabinet. She gave Anne a small smile as she sat it down.
So they made a new batch of batter. Jane slowly calming down as they did so. Although, there was still a small spike of anxiety piercing her chest. And as Jane placed some batter into the frying pan, Anne spoke up.
“Hey Jane?” Anne asked. This earned her a small hum, showing that Jane was listening.
“Do you know what Mère means?”
Jane looked very curious. “No, no I don’t. But I’ve heard you call me that before.”
Anne’s cheeks were flushed. “Well, it means mother.”
Jane froze, staring wide eyed at Anne. “Mother—?”
Anne grinned shyly, rubbing her scar. “I can stop calling you that if it makes you uncomfortable.”
Jane did think about it for a second. Perhaps she was one of the more motherly queens. And if a nickname gave Anne and the others comfort, she wouldn’t protest. Well, maybe she would protest playfully. She also couldn’t deny the swell of happiness. She never got to be a mother and she had heard of people being the ‘mom friend,’ to use modern terms.
“Well, I can certainly say I’m caught off guard.” Jane said slowly before smiling. “But I can’t say I’m against it, I suppose.”
“Even if I’m older than you?” Anne said teasingly.
Jane let out a laugh before teasing right back. “Only physically. Even then you are still shorter.”
“Wh—! Hey!” Anne said as she burst into laughter. But she couldn’t deny how happy she was that Jane had returned to her normal self.
After their laughter ended, Anne hummed before quickly pulling Jane into a hug. “Thank you for being there for us, Mère. You should let us be there for you too.”
Jane paused before wrapping her arms around Anne in return. “I’ll try.”
“All I can ask. And Jane? Whoever yelled at you in the past life? None of us are like them.”
“I… I know.”
“Good, good, now help me get this pancake off the pan before it burns!”
~~||~~||~~
After breakfast, everyone separated to do their own things. Jane remained behind, washing the dishes. Cathy also stayed in the kitchen, sitting at the counter with her notebook, where she was bathed in a patch of sunlight.
There were small stretches of silence between peaceful chatter as Cathy wrote ideas in one of the many notebooks she was seen with.
Jane couldn’t stop thinking about what Anne said. Jane knew none of the queens were like Henry. Truly she did. But memories overpowered that knowing. She was back in the darkness of uncertainty.
Jane glanced over to the counter. She saw Cathy frowning at an empty thermos. Jane chuckled and took the thermos from her before proceeding to the coffee pot.
“I don’t think this much caffeine is healthy.”
“Yet, you are getting me more.” Cathy teased gently.
“Hmm, I suppose I am.” Jane said with a small laugh as she made her way back to the counter.
Jane placed the refilled thermos in front of Cathy, but as she turned, her elbow managed to hit it.
The thermos tilted and fell. Coffee poured over the counter, quickly soaking Cathy’s notebook in the process.
Cathy stared wide eyed at the notebook, and Jane immediately thought the girl would blow up at her. She remembered the time Anna accidentally tore a page out before breakfast. Cathy had freaked out at Anna and didn’t come out of her room until well after dinner.
But Cathy closed her eyes, took a deep inhale and then exhaled. She repeated this several times before opening her eyes and looking at Jane again.
“I’m not angry.” Cathy said slowly. Unknown to Jane, Cathy was reassuring herself too. “I only started using this notebook this morning. I can get a new one and rewrite what I have so far.”
“I’m so sorry, Cathy!” Jane said, hurriedly grabbing paper towels and patting the counter down.
God, this was the second mistake she had made today.
Jane remembered the time she had spilt ink on Henry’s pages in the study. That was one of the worst rages Jane had ever seen him in. And now, Cathy would blow up at her too, just like she had at Anna and just like Henry had raged at Jane.
Hands calmly caught her wrists. Jane’s head jolted up to stare at Cathy. The girl had stood up from her seat and was reaching over the counter. She wasn’t meeting Jane’s eyes, instead looking at the paper towels in her grip.
“It’s okay. I promise.”
Jane felt disbelief. “I… Are you sure?”
Cathy let out a small laugh, quickly taking back her hands. “I’m sure. I haven’t even finished one page in that notebook. I’ll just get another.”
“But what about that time with Anna?”
Cathy noticabley tensed at the reminder. “That notebook was almost completely filled. Also I’ve been looking online at ways to keep myself from blowing up. I’m not mad, Jane. I promise.”
“I… okay.” Jane was still dumbstruck.
“Here, let me help clean it up. Then I’ll go get another notebook.” Cathy said, rounding the counter to take more paper towels.
After that, there was silence as both women cleaned up the spilled drink and soaked notebook, both caught in different thoughts.
Jane was still pulling herself from the past, still anxious that there would inevitably be yelling. Cathy was wondering what had made Jane so panicked over her notebook. Perhaps Cathy’s shouting match with Anna?
But both kept their thoughts silent to the other.
~~||~~||~~
Jane couldn’t keep herself still. She had to be doing something to distract her mind. So she began tidying up her own room.
But still, even with the distraction, there was a constant anxiety in the back of her mind. Anne and Cathy had calmed her down. They didn’t scream at her. But still, Jane’s mind told her that eventually someone would. Be it another queen, Henry, or simply a stranger.
She needed to find a way to calm herself back down.
Maybe a cup of water? Yes, perhaps a cup of water would help.
So Jane made her way from her room into the kitchen, pulling down a glass from the cupboards. But as she pulled back from the cupboard, a voice startled her.
“Hey, Jane—!”
Jane yelped in surprise and the glass toppled out of her hand. Jane fumbled for it but the glass hit the floor and shattered.
Jane felt like an icy pressure had taken hold of her chest. Somehow, this was worse than when she ruined Cathy’s notebook. Worse because she didn’t know who was present. She just knew that the person may yell and scream and for all she knew, it could be Henry.
In fact, Henry’s screams came rushing back to her mind. They sounded so real that Jane was very convinced the man was present.
She needed to clean the glass up before anyone else showed up. But there was no broom. She didn’t have to time to go get one—
“Jane! Stop!” A voice cried and Jane felt her vision clear.
Jane froze as she stared at her hands. At some point, she had begun picking up the shards with her bare hands, cutting her hands and fingers. Her hands were shaking as some of the shards slid from her hands, dripping blood with them.
Kat was the one who spoke, crouched next to Jane with wide eyes.
“I—!”
Kat’s eyes softened. “Stay right there, okay? I’ll get cleaning supplies and the first aid.”
After making sure Jane wouldn’t try to pick up the glass anymore, Kat quickly darted off. Jane simply sat there staring at her bloodied hands, trying to take deep breaths and quash the anxiety.
It didn’t take long for Kat to return, needed items in hand. The first thing she did was quickly sweep the glass into one big pile off to the side before quickly crouching back in front of Jane.
Kat tensed slightly at the blood and inhaled through her teeth upon seeing the shards of glass still stuck in Jane’s hands. Luckily, they were big enough that Kat soon managed to pull them out.
Jane let herself fade out, struggling to control her breathing and bite back pained cries. The screams of rage still pricked at the back of her mind.
Kat’s voice snapped Jane back to reality.
In the time she had been out of it, Kat had managed to clean her hands and bandage them.
“Jane?” Kat asked gently, moving to meet Jane’s eyes. “Are you okay now?”
Jane bit her lip before settling on; “I will be.”
Kat seemed unsure but nodded her head, moving to her next question. “What happened?”
“I’m…” Jane paused. “I’m not sure.”
Jane was only half sure of what happened. She knew she dropped the glass, and she swear she heard Henry’s voice yelling. But besides that, it was mostly a blur.
“Well, I think you had a panic attack.” Kat stated gently.
Jane paused. She recalled what she had learned about panic attacks and realized that Kat was exactly right.
“I… I think so.” She agreed slowly. Her mind was still shifting back to the present. Her eyes trailed over to the pile of glass and winced before turning back to Kat. “I’m sorry about the glass.”
“There’s nothing to apologize for.” Kat said as she shook her head, refusing to let Jane fall into that mind space. “Come on, why don’t we get you some painkillers? Then I’ll clean up the mess.”
Kat helped Jane stand and make it to the counter before quickly finding painkillers and a new glass of water.
There was a very long stretch of silence as Jane took the painkillers.
Finally, Kat spoke up, but she seemed very wary of her own question. “Jane? Can I ask what caused your attack?”
Jane’s mouth felt dry at the question, despite the water she just drank. “I would rather forget about it, Katherine…”
Kat winced at her full name. “Alright… but I'll be here if you need me.”
“I think I’ll head back to my room.” Jane managed to say as she stood and practically stumbled to the door. “Thank you for the assistance, Kat.”
Kat watched her go with full concern, but didn’t try to stop her. “Okay… But if you need anything please come to one of us.”
Jane numbly felt herself nodding as she made it out the kitchen door.
~~||~~||~~
After closing her door, Jane began pacing. She stared down at her shaking hands.
The bandages and dull, throbbing pain were a mark. A mark of one of the many mistakes she had made in just one day.
She told Kat she would rather forget, but her mind refused to do so.
Soon Henry would slam through the door, roaring and bellowing his rage, just as he should have done hours before.
The rational part of Jane’s mind knew that would never happen. Henry was dead and buried (right beside your own body, a traitorous voice whispered. Jane ignored it.) and he had been that way for hundreds of years.
But the years of anxiety, pressure, and mistreatment came flooding back due to one nightmare and Jane couldn’t stop her mind from racing with the possibility of Henry’s return.
So she paced and paced in her room. Her mind filled with everything that could go wrong. Everything that could turn this life, the life where she was finally happy, into a nightmare.
Jane was going to be sick.
She raced out of the room and to the bathroom. If she hadn’t been as frantic, she would have noticed someone in red watching her before swiftly following.
As soon as she had her face over the toilet, Jane began vomiting. Bile, breakfast, and her lunch exited her throat. After that, Jane continued to dry heave.
As she sat hunched over the toilet, she felt gentle hands pull her hair back.
“Let it out, Liebling.” A voice murmured. Jane continued coughing and gagging as the voice held her hair back and ran their other hand up and down her back.
Eventually, the heaving subsided and Jane could only sit there, breathing heavily.
“Why don’t we head back to your room?” The voice, that Jane now recognized as Anna, asked. Jane managed a nod and allowed Anna to help her to her feet as the red queen flushed the toilet.
Miraculously, they ran into no one else and Anna had Jane back in her room in seconds.
“Let me go get you a cup of water and a cloth. I’ll be right back.” Anna said as Jane took a seat on the bed. She was out of the room as quickly as she came in. She soon returned with a glass of water and a damp rag.
“Thank you.” Jane rasped politely as she took the water.
After taking small sips of water and wiping down her face, Jane looked pleadingly at Anna, who took a seat next to her.
“Please don’t tell the others…”
Anna paused for a second before letting out a sigh as she gave Jane a smile. “I’ll only tell them if you want me too.” Then her face twisted to concern. “But… are you sick? I can run to the store.”
“No! I—!” Jane froze. She looked to the ground, refusing to meet Anna’s eyes. “Cathy has mentioned that anxiety can make you sick.”
Anna’s brows furrowed before her smile became a sad one. “Then, would you like to talk about what made you that anxious, Liebling?”
“I don’t know…”
“You don’t have to tell me. But if you ever do want to, then I’m right here.”
Jane paused for a moment. This was normally something she never really told anyone about. In her past life, everyone brushed her off so she eventually stopped trying.
But Anna… Anna was always patient, and listened when someone came to her. She listened to every single queen, including Jane. She was the confident pillar everyone went to. Although, Jane sometimes wished the red queen would talk to them in return.
Jane knows that Anna is someone she can trust. So she opened her mouth to speak and everything seemed to flood out.
“I’ve been making so many mistakes today! And it feels like Henry will be here, screaming, any second now! And I can’t—!” Jane broke off into a sob.
Anna immediately pulled Jane into her side, her grip slowly pulling Jane back to the present. Jane managed to hear Anna mutter a German curse or two, directed at Henry before she spoke clearly again.
“Henry is dead, liebling. He will never come back.” Anna soothed, her voice strong with certainty. “And I hope you know by now that none of us in this house would ever scream at you over a simple mistake.”
Jane moved so her face was buried in Anna’s shoulder. “I thought I was getting better. I really thought I was. But last night I just… I had a nightmare… I made another mistake, Henry wouldn’t stop yelling. And then I woke up, and I’ve been making mistakes all day… I’m back where I started, Anna.”
“First, thank you for trusting me with this, Liebling.” Anna said gently, her hand rubbing up and down Jane’s arm in a soothing gesture. “Second, I think you should tell the others.”
“What?” Jane asked immediately, pulling back slightly to look Anna in the eyes.
“I’m not forcing you to tell them. That is your call.” Anna reassured calmly. “I’m just telling you that they dealt with Henry too. They will listen and they will understand.” Then, she reiterated; “None of us would ever hurt you, Liebling. Physically or mentally.”
Jane thought about it and knew Anna was right. Henry was probably just as horrible, if not even more so, to all the other queens in the household. They had been understanding and patient throughout the entire day and also through the past months. She wanted to get her anxieties off her chest. And there was no one better to talk to than the women who had been through their own scary situations with the same man. Not to mention, these five women were more like family than anyone had ever been to her. She could say with certainty that she trusted them with her life.
“Okay.”
“You’re certain that this is your choice?” Anna questioned seriously. “I don't want to force you…”
“Yes, I’m certain. But… Can we stay here for a while?” Jane asked quietly, tucking her head back into Anna’s shoulder.
“Whatever you want to do, Liebling.” Anna agreed with a small laugh. “Now, am I allowed to ask why you have bandages on your hands?”
~~||~~||~~
Eventually, the two separated and made their way down the hall to the living room. It was after dinner by this point and the queens were all seated around the living room. Kat stole one end of the couch, Catherine and Cathy taking claim of the armchairs, with Anne splayed out on the floor.
Everyone glanced up upon seeing the two final queens enter the room. They were about to give greetings when they seemed to notice the anxiety on Jane’s face, and Anna’s arm wrapped securely around the third queen. Their eyes also trailed to Jane’s bandaged hands. But Kat had noticeably warned them about it.
“Are you guys okay?” Anne was the one who spoke as she sat up.
“I want to talk to you all about my anxieties.” Jane went straight to the point, nervously folding her hands together.
Everyone straightened almost unconsciously. They had a very good idea of what caused the anxiety, but they never had proof. Of course, the idea revolves around a certain ex.
“Are you sure, Paloma?” Catherine asked gently, closing her book. “We don’t want you to feel forced.”
“I’m sure… I want to get this off my chest.” Jane admitted. Jane made her way over to the couch and took a seat, Anna sticking by her side.
There was silence for several seconds. The queens did not want to push Jane. Anna gently laid a hand on the center of Jane’s back. This seemed to encourage the silver queen into speaking up as she leaned back into the touch. Her eyes were glued to the floor.
“Henry… there was always something I was doing wrong.” Jane said, refusing to look anyone in the eye. “It didn’t matter what it was or no matter how many times I did it. It was always wrong.”
The queens all winced. Their suspicions were right.
“He would yell and scream. He always did it when no one important was around.” Jane continued, shrinking in on herself slightly.
“Did he… ever do anything physical?” It was Kat who asked.
“No… but there were always… threats.”
“What kind of threats?” Anna asked in a low tone, her eyes narrowing.
“The most common one?” Then in a shaky voice, Jane quoted; “You don’t want to end up like that Boleyn girl, do you?”
There was an immediate shift in the air as every single queen gained a scowl on their face. Jane was also half sure she heard Anne letting out a low growl.
“Of fucking course he did.” Anne spat. “Tête de noeud.”
“I for one, am not surprised.” Cathy huffed, Kat quickly nodding her agreement.
“Beheading always was one of his favorite threats.” The pink queen noted.
“It wasn’t just Henry. There was also a constant pressure to be perfect. Henry. The court. The people. They all pressured me to be perfect.” Jane confessed, clenching her fists so tight that her knuckles turned white. “There was no making mistakes. God forbid I couldn’t give Henry his heir.”
“It all only changed when I got pregnant.” Jane finished. “Henry became the husband I originally thought he would be. The only mistake I could make then was either having a girl, or a miscarriage.”
The queens had been silent during the rest of Jane’s tale.
“Even the ‘most loved’ was put through Hell.” Anne spoke as she shook her head sadly, making quotes with her fingers as she said ‘most loved.’
“All that is over, Liebling.” Anna said. “Thank god, Henry isn’t walking on the Earth.”
“And we will never yell at you for a mistake.” Kat said, determination tracing her features. “That was Henry, not us.”
“I know… I know that.” Jane said with a sad smile. “I just had a nightmare last night. Of Henry.”
Understanding dawned on four of the six queens. Why she had been so anxious whenever there was a mistake. She kept remembering Henry.
“If you have a nightmare like that, come to any of us.” Cathy stated quickly. “We have each other now.”
This earned her a grateful smile and nod from the silver queen. “I will.”
“Let us help with the chores more too.” Catherine spoke up next, watching Jane carefully. “I know that we have our weekly thing and that it’s something for you to do. I understand that. But we don’t want you to overwork yourself.”
“I think I can do that.” Jane agreed with a nod. She wasn’t sure how easy it would be to actually do it. But she could try.
After that confirmation, everyone switched gears, offering anxiety techniques that they themselves used or found online. Cathy’s idea especially stuck out for Jane.
“What do you like to do to pass the time, Jane?” Cathy spoke up, watching the silver queen.
Jane seemed caught off guard by the question. “My interests? Well… I do like baking. And knitting was something I loved to do in the past life. Although I haven’t gotten much of a chance to do it recently…”
“Well, you can use those things to calm yourself down.” Cathy explained, giving Jane a small smile. “Something you love to do can help calm you.”
“A way to get your mind off things?” It was Catherine who asked.
“That’s a way to look at it, yes.” Cathy agreed with a small laugh.
“Ah… then is it alright if we do some sewing now?” Jane asked, almost sheepishly. While the talk helped greatly, there was still a small surge of anxiety in her chest.
“Are you sure you can do that with your hands?” Kat spoke up, a worried frown on her face.
“I still would like to try.”
The others chuckled and Catherine and Cathy were both out of their seats and out of the room.
As they left, Anna pressed herself a little closer to Jane and whispered in her ear. “I’m proud of you Liebling. And I’m sorry you’re going through all of this.”
“Thank you, Anna.” Jane replied, her smile the happiest it had been all day. “I have all of you now… and thank you for convincing me to tell them.”
“I convinced you to do nothing.” Anna said with a small chuckle. “Telling everyone was your decision.”
“A good one?”
“Well, that’s also up to you.”
Jane glanced at Anne and Kat, who were talking about their past sewing experiences, and at Catherine and Cathy, who had returned with the needed materials.
“I think it was.”
“Then it was a good decision.” Anna said simply, earning a laugh from the silver queen.
Everyone began chatting happily as they grabbed needles and thread. Jane being very cautious of the bandages around her hands. She fumbled slightly, but soon had a steady hand.
“Are you not going to sew, Cathy?” Catherine asked her goddaughter.
Sure enough, Cathy had grabbed her notebook and a cup of hot chocolate (at Jane’s insistence to not drink coffee after dinner) and was perched back in her armchair.
“Ah. I’ve never really liked sewing, sorry.” Cathy apologized.
“That’s alright!” Jane said happily, most of her anxieties slowly fading as she grabbed some thread. “What is your new story about?”
Cathy’s eyes lit up and as the girl began ranting about the new story, Jane glanced around the room.
Looking around at the women who had become so much like family, Jane knew exactly what her new project would be.
Over the course of many days, everyone would smile when they saw their own faces and colors appear on a sewn tapestry, one by one.
~~||~~||~~
Jane Seymour has dealt with years of abuse. She knew it would be hard to get better.
But the other queens understood better than they did before. They helped Jane whenever something broke, or a minor mistake was made. Gentle reassurances fought back against the anxiety.
She used Cathy’s anxiety techniques as well. Focused on her baking, sewing, and caretaking. Breathing exercises helped calm both her mind and heartbeat.
And as Jane watched the faces appear on the tapestry, and heard the laughter of whom the faces belonged to, she knew that everything was okay.
Jane Seymour was no longer bound to observe and serve.