Vivid World (Emmakarin)
When she first heard the news, shock had stilled her mind. It left her in a daze, confused at where to begin processing the information given. Back then, one person was there to hold her hand and reassure her that there would be nothing she would deal with alone.
That moment, Karin was afraid of what it meant to lose something so important. Yet, each of her trembling hands was quelled by gentle touches, soothing words calming her mind, if not for a moment.
"It'll be okay, Karin-chan," she remembered Emma saying in a hospital room, the sterile environment a clear contrast to the radiance surrounding her. "We'll go through this together, okay?"
Karin didn't answer, the words lost in a concept unknown in her mind. A world without sight. Complete darkness. Since then, she looked around more, regardless how each passing day brought on the gravity of loss in her head.
One day, she had a light meal. Colorful fruits, accompanied by round, fluffy pancakes.
By then, her sight had gotten blurrier, the vibrant assortment a mess of color in front of her hands. That day, Karin had trouble enjoying her breakfast, her waning sight hindered further by tears.
Emma took the day off, Karin too vulnerable to be left alone that one morning.
"Do you want to go to the park, Karin-chan?" she remembered Emma asking her in their apartment. It was a slow, quiet Saturday, both free from their work. She had agreed, but only remembered how her hands fumbled through the closet, feeling through the melding colors of her wardrobe.
Karin relied on Emma to coordinate her outfit. It was a slow, gradual routine, and Karin never took the time to understand why it made her feel so bitter.
"The cherry blossoms are almost in full bloom!" The blur of pink, blue, and green were all she saw, but the enthusiasm in Emma's voice painted a vivid image. Of a world she was slowly losing day by day.
That day, Karin held her hand tighter, fingers anxious in their intertwined hold. Emma didn't seem to mind. She even heard her laugh.
These were the gentler days. Some were darker, and most had begun to blur not just through sight, but in the fog of her mind that never lifted since the day she found out she would go blind.
One evening, Karin sat alone in their bedroom, staring out into a window overlooking the city. A sea of lights behind a dark expanse beyond the window, far beyond their apartment.
It was two colors, white and black. Nothing else mattered, her eyes couldn't perceive much more.
Emma walked in at a bad time, Karin remembered. She had begun to realize the full weight of it all when, upon feeling warm hands cup her cheeks, she saw nothing but a blur of dark brown.
"Emma?" her voice trembled, a moment of uncertainty that pierced the dark bedroom. The hold on her tightened, but the words that answered her threatened to break.
"I'm here, Karin-chan," Emma hummed, Karin hearing the disjointed rhythm in her voice. "I'm here."
That instant, it finally made sense to Karin. All the fear, the frustration, and bitterness at each passing day that saw her vision degrade.
She reached forward and felt a fear much greater than her own. A body that trembled harsher, a chest that breathed shallower. Karin realized the quivering of Emma's lips when her own pressed closed. It was a moment, and only a moment when Karin saw clearly. Not through her eyes, but from everything else that flooded her senses in that moment.
"I'm glad you're here."
Karin whispered. It was a line she continued to whisper when they were together.
One morning, they lay in bed together. Karin felt sunlight touch her skin, the day starting without her. Emma was at her side, and she found her hand easily.
A slow, but firm grip. Karin felt herself smile as movement made the bed sway. She counted the seconds in her mind, then Emma spoke a soft, gentle greeting.
She heard Emma gasp. Karin hummed, holding her hand tighter.
"Karin-chan?" her voice was delicate, almost hesitant. For the first time, Karin was curious at how afraid Emma sounded. "Are you... can you-?"
"Not a thing," Karin finished with a tone of finality. Emma shook, feeling the twitch in her fingers. She reached further, finding the curve of her waist.
As she pulled her close, another question filled the air. "Are you all right, Karin-chan?"
That moment on, Karin would never see her smile or laugh again.
That was precisely why she smiled at that moment. She remembered Emma always smiling when she did it first. "It'll be okay, Emma."
Karin paused. Emma was a vivid image in her mind. “You’re here.”