Realizations
FLASHBACK
You were bouncing with excitement as you made your way home. Looking down into the brown bag of pastries you had saved up for a while in order to buy. Today was special, it was your fathers birthday and the first one you'd both be spending without your mother.
You had to make sure everything would go as planned.
You saved to buy his favorite pastries and had even had enough left over to buy a few for Anthony.
You were torn up inside about your mother not being here but for now you needed to shove aside your feelings. You had your feelings shoved away for his sake ever since you received the news of her passing. It ate you up inside...but you needed to be strong. For your father.
Walking up the stone path you inhaled deeply and wore a wide smile. Pulling the key from your pocket you pushed it into the lock and let the door swing open.
"I'm home, dad!",you shouted into the house with a cheery and bright tone. Kicking off your shoes you glanced around the empty living room and kicked the door shut behind you.
"I've got a surprise for you! I bet you'll love it!",you shouted yet again with a small excited squeal. Walking into the kitchen you set the brown bag atop the counter. Thats when you noticed the family photo smashed on the ground.
With furrowed brows you knelt down and picked it up, careful to avoid the glass. With a small frown you looked around and placed the frame atop the counter.
"Dad?",you called out as you began to walk towards his room. Turning the knob and pushing you realized the door was blocked by something. You felt worry pool in your stomach.
"Dad? Dad! Are you okay!",you began to grow panicked and continued to push the door. The heavy object blocking it began to slide against the hardwood floor.
With one final hard push the dresser that had been blocking it fell over. The door swung open and you screamed in utter horror.
"Oh my god what did you do?!",you shouted as you ran forward and grabbed ahold of his slit wrists. The soft mint bedsheets were stained crimson, the suit he wore was recognizable...the same one from the wedding photos that hung in the hallway.
"H-Hey, papa...c'mon wake up...I'm here y—you can't leave me too...please you'll be fine...",you began to sob as you fruitlessly attempted to apply pressure to the deep cuts. Tears rolled down your cheeks and you flinched when you heard a shaky inhale.
"I...I'm sorry baby cakes..."
You gasped as your bloodied hands reached up and cupped his colorless cheeks, your head shook rapidly is disbelief and despair. His eyes were half-lidded and glossy, the life was draining from his guilty eyes.
"N-No...I thought you were getting better! I thought I was—",you cut yourself short when his eyes completely shut and his head goes limp against the pillow. You freeze, his warm blood seeping into your palms and hot tears streaking down your cheeks.
You leaned down against his chest and began to sob, choking on your own gasps for air and gripping his bloodied wrists.
"I thought I was saving you dad..."
END OF FLASHBACK
«»
Alastor stepped off of his car with a gentle sigh and a shit-eating grin.
Pushing up his cheaters he couldn't wait to spend the night annoying that dammed crossdresser.
He also wouldn't mind making you a bit uncomfortable as well.
Just as he was about to cross the street he stilled, watching a woman run from the apartment building. It didn't take him another second to realize it was you.
He let out a soft sigh at the sight of you. You looked absolutely stunning. But he felt a pang hit his heart when your hand fell from your face and bunched up in your hair.
Tears were staining your red cheeks, your shoulders shook and your lips were parted as you took deep and shallow breaths. Your hand was now over your chest and you glanced around.
With your eyes landing on Alastor you both stood still for a few moments.
Alastor felt his heart being ripped out of his chest at the look of completely heartbreak riddled across your beautiful face. He found himself running towards you without a second thought.
"(Y/N)...",he breathed out upon reaching your paralyzed self. You looked up at him through blurry vision and felt your heart aching and embarrassment riddle your conscience.
"Alastor...",you said shakily. Your vulnerability and hurt got the best of you. Wrapping your arms around his waist you pulled him close and buried your face into his chest.
Normally Alastor would take pleasure in such a sight and he would be in utter disgust at being touched. But as you held him close and sobbed against his chest he found his heart aching for you, and he let his long arms wrap around you.
His hand soothingly rubbed circles on your shaking back and he looked up to the building with a murderous feeling in his stomach.
What did that daisy do to you...
"I-I'm sorry...I just—",pulling away from his chest your puffy and red eyes looked up to him,"Something happened with Anthony and I don't want to be a burden b-but can we go s-some—" Your bottom lip quivers again and with every sentence your voice cracks and falters.
Alastor surprises himself by simply putting a hand on the back of your head and bringing it back to his chest. He gives a soft nod,"Of course my dear..." You sniffle and shake, his rhythmic heartbeat managed to quell your racing one.
"Thank you, Alastor...",you mumbled softly into his chest and despite your state you looked up at him with warm and sad eyes and a genuine smile. "You're always here to save the day, huh?"
As you said this with such sincerity and casualty Alastor realized something. The fear in your eyes when he was scary you, the fear in any of his victims eyes, the act of murdering alone...none of that compared to this feeling he had right now.
As you looked at him warmly and with a brightness behind those eyes he could also see the brokenness and utter aching behind them. He's known you for such a short time yet he could even realize now.
The fear he instilled in you, your reaction to his darker side, even the look of desire you gave him was nothing compared to this look in your eyes.
The look that signified you were glad to see him, you weren't...disgusting by him. From your first unconventional interaction you never looked at him with disgust or judgement.
Despite knowing these dark and horrifying aspects of him he still received your warm smiles and kind eyes. And they were genuine.
He also noticed the way you were with people. Rosie, a woman who took a disliking to nearly every other woman had grown to like you, Husk who was indifferent and mean with every managed to give you a smile. And don't think he didn't notice the way the usually snarky and sarcastic Cheryl was sweet and endearing with you.
You were a bright light that he knew must've been put out so many times before. Yet you remained bright. Now you were sobbing in his arms yet managed to give him a smile and those damn kind eyes.
Those...eyes...
“𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝘁 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝘄, 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁.“
Alastor grew more overwhelmed the longer he looked down into your glossy and teary eyes. Those eyes. He felt chills run up his spine and he felt his eye twitch. So many overwhelming emotions at once he felt that murderous coping mechanism prod at him.
"Let's get going...(Y/N)..."