Chapter 5
About 3 days ago, Donna Troy had realized --and accepted-- that she would always love Dawn Granger. There had never been, and never would be another person like her in Donna’s eyes.
That didn’t make it any easier for her.
There still hadn’t been any missions for a while now… just training and downtime for the team.
Now, the team was gathered around the fireplace in the living room, with cans of soda in their hands, engaged in one of their night time conversations.
Dawn always had the most to say during these conversations, and Donna loved that-- just the sound of Dawn’s voice, soft and gentle, gave her that feeling of exhilaration, that incredible feeling in her heart.
And then, as Dawn leaned over and gave Hank a casual kiss, Donna felt that feeling slip away as quickly as it had come, replaced by anger and jealousy, making her chest burn.
She stood up suddenly with a forced smile, excusing herself from the conversations, saying she was tired and wanted to turn in early before walking away hurriedly.
Once she was in the hallway and out of sight, she took a deep, shuddering breath as she put her back against the wall and slid to the floor, pulling a small tube out of her pocket.
Its contents? Blue pills, each one barely bigger than a jelly bean.
Donna screwed off the cap and took a pill in her fingers before popping it in her mouth. Almost immediately, she felt a strange cooling sensation come over her body.
Fuck, she thought bitterly as her vision blurred a little. This doesn’t feel right.
Having picked up these pills at the nearby drug store, the doctor who prescribed them to her reminded her that she was only to take one a day at most, and only when absolutely necessary. That’s how strong the pills were.
Donna trudged into her room and sat down on the bed, holding the tube of pills in her hand. If one pill could do more to her mind and body than 9 bottles of beer could… what would the whole tube do? She was pretty sure she knew.
She kept her eyes fixed on the tube, as she thought about Dawn. So kind, so beautiful… and so much better than what Donna deserved. The way she smiled, laughed-- hell, the way she did ANYTHING made Donna fall in love with her more and more. Her eyes filled up with tears, and she quickly wiped them away with the sleeve of her sweater.
It was too much. She couldn’t take the pain any longer.
I’m so sorry, everyone.
She raised the tube above her lips and tipped it over, letting every last pill slide down her throat.
Moments after swallowing the pills, Donna felt dizzy. Her vision began to blur so much that she couldn’t even see anything anymore. Feeling herself slowly drift away, she used what was left of her willpower to picture Dawn in her mind… with her perfect smile and beautiful face.
She gave a soft laugh at the thought.
Then, she felt the back of her head hit the mattress, and everything went black.
Dawn Granger knew that Donna Troy was different from the start.
But she never figured out what it was about her that made her different. She was an enigma to Dawn. On one hand, she was the coolest, most badass woman she’d ever known.
But Dawn had also noticed the more emotional side of her, hidden behind her tough exterior. The way Donna smiled at her during their night time conversations was one thing, but the way she had found her drinking and crying out of heartbreak was another.
There was so much pain in her, and it was hurting Dawn so badly, not knowing what the cause of her pain was.
Wait. Maybe she did know. It was because of someone, right? Whoever had broken her heart, that person was one of the reasons.
Dawn felt her stomach twist with anger at the thought. If she ever found out who this person was, she’d kick their ass for making Donna cry like that. Maybe that would cheer Donna up.
Having said goodnight to Dick, she told Hank she’d come to their room soon, before walking to Donna’s room. If she could spend a little time talking with her one-on-one, maybe she could figure out how to make her feel better.
She stopped in front of the door, and took a deep breath before knocking twice.
“Donna, it’s me. Can I come in?”
No response.
She raised her hand to knock again, and remembered Donna saying she was tired. Maybe she was asleep.
So Dawn slowly opened the door, quietly poking her head in. The first thing she noticed was the lights were still on.
The second thing she noticed was that Donna was only lying halfway on the bed...her feet were still limply scraping the surface of the floor, as if she’d fallen asleep sitting on the edge of her bed.
Unsure, Dawn walked over to Donna. Her eyes were closed, and she wasn’t moving. “Donna?” Dawn asked with uncertainty, as she dropped down next to her on the bed.
“Donna.” She shook her by the shoulders gently. No response.
Then, she noticed the empty pill bottle on the floor, less than a foot away from the bed. And then it hit her.
Feeling her panic rise, Dawn shook the unresponsive brunette harder. “Donna. Donna...come on...”
No response. Donna’s eyes remained closed.
Lips trembling, Dawn put her ear to her chest. No heartbeat. “Fuck, fuck...come on, Donna, please don’t do this to me...”
She shook her with every ounce of desperation she had, cupping Donna’s face in her hands, brushing her fingers across her cheeks, trying to get her to respond. “Please, Donna, just stay with me, open your eyes, open your fucking eyes...”
Dawn touched foreheads with Donna, trying to feel her breath on her face. Nothing.
Tears glistened in Dawn’s eyes as she put her arms around Donna’s waist and pulled, only managing to lift her body less than an inch off the bed, her neck arched back. Keeping one arm supporting her waist, Dawn reached out with a hand and lifted Donna's head to face her as she began to cry.
“Help! Please! Somebody help!”