Summer break - Part 2
“What did they say?” Lando asked, sitting in the sun on the balcony, sipping on some juice.
“Sales exceeded our expectations by far. They are talking about upping the production even more and they are analysing the reviews, apparently people would be interested in a heartier snack as well.”
“A heartier snack?” Lando asked while Oscar sat down, taking off his shirt and starting to apply sunscreen.
“Well, something more filling. I already have a couple of things in mind, but I’m not sure.”
“What would you do?”
“Well, I’m not sure how we want to pull this, we can’t really make it a sandwich or something, maybe a shake? But it would have to be chilled then. Maybe a sandwich like thing with cracker? A lentil salad and things like that would also need to be chilled. If we maybe just sell the bread? But that would be something totally different, it most likely wouldn’t go with the rest.” Oscar thought loudly and Lando smiled at him “We also want to do a Christmas special, we’re not sure what either. Maybe cookies or something with cinnamon and aniseed. That’s very christmassy. Are you okay? You look like a puppy.”
“Yes, I am” Lando said “I love seeing and hearing you this happy.”
“Ugh. Don’t you have your own home?” Chloe asked, opening the door for Daniel.
“Hey Chloe, I thought we were good now?” Daniel laughed.
“We are … but you are here SO much.”
“You are here a lot, too.”
“I live here!” Chloe defended herself.
“Hey you guys! You’re all good?” Nicole asked when they came into the kitchen, giving Daniel a quick kiss.
“Daniel is back AGAIN.” Chloe said with a lot of sass, sitting down at the kitchen table.
“Yes, Chloe and that is okay, or are you mad at him for some reason?”
“No.”
“Good, then there is no reason for you to not eat your fruit.” Nicole said, sitting down at the table together with Daniel, taking a sip of coffee.
“Ugh” Chloe made, looking at the fruit salad “Can I just play dolls and eat fruit tomorrow?” she asked, playing sweet.
“No, you’ve got to eat fruit every day, Chloe.” Nicole said and Chloe looked at the fruit some more.
“How about a deal? You’ll eat your fruit and then I play dolls with you.” Daniel offered, holding an arm around Nicole.
“You want to play dolls with me?” Chloe asked suspiciously.
“Yes, I’m a very good doll player. You eat the fruit salad, I can play dolls with you and then I cut the tree for your mum, how does that sound?” Daniel stretched his hand forwards “Deal?”
“Deal” Chloe said, shaking his hand and then starting to eat the fruit. Nicole smiled into her coffee cup. She was working in her little nook when she saw Daniel and Chloe getting outside later. Daniel kept Chloe back from the tree at first, cutting off the bigger branches. He pulled them a little from the tree and then helped Chloe getting on some gardening gloves before handing her a gardening scissor, Chloe starting to cut off the smaller twigs while Daniel returned to the tree, cutting the other branches Nicole wanted off.
They were done with the tree for lunch time, Julia also getting back from school. Nicole made them some pasta with green pesto for lunch.
George and Alex spent the summer break in a very calm manner. They went to Thailand, Alex wanting to spend some time at a retreat in a convent. Alex spending a lot of time at the temple, working on his mind and soul and the loss of his pregnancy. By now he admitted, he wouldn’t have had an abortion. He would have had the baby. George accompanied and supported him, getting to know the Buddhist beliefs more. He never thought just being calm and staying silent, meditating, could be this helpful and freeing. It really let him take a breath, recharge, just free his mind from racing and all the pressure.
They got up pretty early, starting with meditation, followed by a little breakfast before Goerge helped some monks in the garden, Alex helping others weaving clothes and carpets, which the monks sold. They had lunch, followed by a little ceremony, then they worked again until dinner, followed by another meditation and some free time. Even though there was work and the work was hard, George learned to see the work in another way, taught by the monks. It always had an underlying calmness, not an underlying pressure. He had some talks with the monks itself, realizing that the loss of the pregnancy and the almost loss of Alex had affected him more than he thought. He had seen the miscarriage as painful, but he at the same time built a wall in front of him, concentrating on Alex so much he didn’t give himself real time to grieve. It happened one afternoon, all of the emotions breaking out, letting him sink to the floor crying and whimpering. The monks with him didn’t say anything, they sat around him in a circle, somehow making him feel protected and safe in their middle until his tears were over. All but one monk went back to their work.
“In Buddhism, we believe in reincarnation” the monk started calmly, sitting on his shins opposite to George, also on his shins “To be born as a human is a privilege, it’s an honour. You can only be born as a human if you have done enough good and shown your worth in your previous lives. Your child not being born as a human doesn’t mean it was not worthy, it just means it wasn’t meant for the world of humans right now. It does live, or is in the process to come to life in another world. Whatever world that might be. Our belief is, that you can always be reborn, even if you went through all of your lives, your samsaras, and you worked for all your good karma to get into the world of gods, where you can enjoy pure bliss and joy, there is a possibility to be … set back, to have to repeat your samsaras. The world of gods is a wonderful world, but if you’re getting entitled or belittle others, look down on them just because they didn’t achieve to be gods yet, you will be set back to the first samsara, the first world. Your child’s life is not lost forever. It will be reborn. A loss is always painful, but it is also the start of a new life, and every life is the chance to do good, to do better.”
“I think I start to understand that.” George said slowly “I just thought about it from one side. That our child is gone. I … didn’t really think about it as a new beginning as well.”
“And there is absolutely no fault in that. Every religion has their own believes, their own opinions. Not even every rebirth is the same in all religions. It is always a matter of perspective as well.” The monk smiled and George smiled back.
“I want to thank you very much for welcoming me here. When I came here, I thought it would be for me to support Alex. I didn’t think I’d learn this much here. That I’d … that it would help me this much.”
“Anyone who comes here for help, support, or to help or support their loved ones is welcome. I also want to thank you for being this open to us as well. You could have just stayed here and helped in the garden. You made the decision to participate, to attend meditation and our ceremonies. I think, you were looking for help without even knowing you did. You can also, at any point, if you decide this is not the right way of believe for you, leave. You are not bound to us in any way.”
“I understand. I never really had a religion I believed in. I was raised Christian, I celebrated Christmas, easter, thanksgiving … but it never felt like something I could … connect to, that I could believe in. It’s being said that God knows what to do, that he will make the right decisions. But there are so many things happening in this world … how can that be?”
“Our believe is, that it can not be. There is no one who always makes the right decisions. That is why we believe in karma. Most people in the world think that karma is something bad, but in reality, karma is all of your doings together. The good deeds, the sins, the mindset. You can do a lot of good things, but if your mind, your thoughts are hurtful, selfish and bring harm, your karma is not a good one. Every life is a chance to learn and to develop, that is the reason why we are reborn.”
“Isn’t the Dalai Lama free of sins, though?” George asked.
“No, not completely. The Dalai Lama is translated as ocean of wisdom, the word Dalai means ocean and Lama is something like master or teacher. You are not firstly born as a Dalai Lama. You were reborn before, you have lived, learned and developed in other samsaras, before you decided out of compassion for other life forms, to not be reborn again, but instead to exist one last time as the Dalai Lama, to help others learn and develop and to guide them through the samsaras. If the Dalai Lama dies, that is the end of life. There is no other possibility to end a life forever.”
“So … our child will be alive, somewhere, in some form … until it has the mindset to be a Dalai Lama, which is the last possible form of existence?”
“Pretty much, yes. It is possible it is already reborn in some form, or it might still be waiting to be reborn. When your child will be reborn can’t be said, sometimes it takes a while until we are ready for a rebirth.”
“Will I be able to … realize when it happens? The rebirth of our child?”
“That is something that is highly unlikely. It is possible for some of us to … find out … to feel, some of our previous lives, so in theory, someone could walk up to you one day, but that is an almost impossible thing to happen. It is my time for meditation now, would you like to accompany me?”
“Thank you, that would be wonderful.” George said and they bowed to each other before making their way to the temple.