Little Things
Chapter 13 – Little things
Your hand fits in mine like it's made just for me
But bear this mind, it was meant to be
And I'm joining up the dots with the freckles on your cheeks
And it all makes sense to me
Not even working late annoyed Nicole that day. She was positively happy. She was feeling stronger than she ever felt in a long time. She couldn’t even remember when was the last day her knee bothered her. It was like she was finally in charge of her life.
Walking around the campus, Nicole spotted a face she hasn’t seen in a while.
“Mercedes Gardner. Nice to see you around.”
“Hello, Nicole. You look good.”
“So do you.”
“I’m getting hotter every year that goes by, aren’t I?”
“Definitely,” Nicole replied chuckling. “What are you doing here at GRU?”
“I am an investor at the university, so I decided to come over to check if my money is being well spent,” Mercedes said. “But look at you, Haught. You seem strong and trim.”
“Well, yeah, I feel better than ever. I’m clean now,” Nicole felt full of pride.
“No way. That bitch was right, after all, you did pay off. I guess my money is being well spent in the end,” Mercedes huffed surprised.
“What do you mean?”
“Nothing. Nothing at all,” Mercedes sounded like she was caught doing something wrong. “I should go now. I still have too many things to do. Nice to see you, Haught.”
Nicole didn’t even have time to ask anything else and Mercedes was out of sight. That was when something clicked in Nicole. She was putting together the pieces of the puzzle. She didn’t want to bite off more than she could chew. She had to be sure. Walking back to the administration building, Nicole felt her heart beating hard on her chest.
“Excuse me, Ms. Lucado. Can I have a word?”
“Don’t tell there is some problem, Haught. I’m leaving for today, you should be leaving for today,” the woman complained.
“I just have a quick question.”
“What is it?”
“Some time ago, you told me that someone asked you to keep me here,” Nicole said. “What did you mean? Who asked you that?”
“I think you are smart enough to discover the answer to that by yourself.”
“It was Mercedes Gardner, wasn’t she? She is an investor of the GRU.”
“She is,” Lucado simply said.
“But why would she ask you to give me a job?”
“She never told me that. Your guess is as good as mine, but if I have to say something about it, I’d say she wasn’t the head behind the idea,” Lucado said. “You know what I mean, don’t you?”
“I do. And I’d like to apologize to you,” Nicole admitted. “I know that I gave you a hard time for so long, and you were always patient. I understand I was never the best employee here.”
“As you already know, I couldn’t fire you,” Lucado smirked at her.
“Still you keep up with me on my worst days. It means a lot to me that you gave me a chance.”
“You were not bad all the time, Haught. On the days you are clean, you are hardworking and I know you have this entire university in your hands.”
“I’m clean for good now, I don’t plan on getting back to the life that I used to have,” Nicole told her boss. “So thank you for making an effort for me.”
“You’re welcome. I hope everything goes well for you. Truly. You are a good person. Now, get out of here, Nicole. I just want to see you again on Monday.”
Nicole nodded and walked out of the office, knowing exactly where she had to be. PeaceMaker.
Going inside the center, she didn’t stop at the front desk and headed straight to Wynonna’s office. Nicole knocked on the door and waited for permission to get in.
“Hey, Nicole. What are you doing here?” Wynonna instantly worried when she saw the look on her friend's face. “What’s wrong? What happened?”
“It was you all along. And I never knew. I never suspected.”
“What are you talking about?”
“My job at the GRU. You asked Mercedes to intercede for me with Lucado, didn’t you?” Nicole's voice was husky and she clenched her jaw.
“Yes, I did. You needed money and a job, that was the only idea I could come up with,” Wynonna finally admitted. She almost took a step back because Nicole was going her way at a high speed, but she was surprised when long arms involved her in a tight hug.
“Thank you, Wynonna,” Nicole sniffed. “Thank you.”
“I didn’t do much. I just had a small talk with Mercedes,” Wynonna reciprocated the hug.
“Of course you did,” the redhead moved away from her friend a little. “I was one step away from losing myself completely, and for good. This job was the only thing that kept me grounded for a while. You saved my life.”
“I’m glad you are still around and kicking.”
“What else did you do? And please, tell me. I need to know the other things you did for me.”
“I… well, I used to take you home after you had a bad day,” Wynonna confessed.
“When I was high and passed out on the street?”
“Yeah. I didn’t want you to wake up alone like that. I knew you would feel embarrassed.”
“PeaceMaker?” Nicole moved her arms around to show the room.
“I always wanted to do something to help other people, but I didn’t know what. You just gave me the idea.”
“Fuck. There is no way I can thank you enough.”
“Just keep working like you have been doing,” Wynonna said.
“You and Waverly have been helping me to make my inventory, but I didn’t put some names there on purpose,” Nicole said.
“Who?”
“You, Wynonna. You are the person I hurt the most all these years.”
“Nicole…”
“Don’t. I know what you’ll say, that it’s alright, that it’s behind us, that there’s no need for any of that. Bullshit. I have been horrible to you not only with my actions but also with my words. I said things to you that are unforgivable. I put your family at risk and I’m glad that my behavior didn’t cause permanent damage to your life, but I can’t imagine how much I must have hurt you. I want you to know that I am really sorry about all the hurt that I put you through.”
“I know, Nicole.”
“I don’t know if I deserve it, but I want to ask for your forgiveness. Can you forgive me for being the worst friend you could have? Can you forgive me for insulting you the way I did? If I made a list of the times I failed you, it would be longer than the road to the Homestead. Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?” Nicole bagged.
“Of course I forgive you, Nicole. Those days are gone.”
“Do you think we could try and be friends again? I’d really like to be close to you again, for you to like me again.”
“Come here, you big idiot,” this time it was Wynonna who hugged the redhead. “I never stopped thinking about you as my friend. I never stopped liking you, Nicole. And I am sorry, too. I probably didn’t make it easier for you either.”
“No, you were great. You were trying to help me. It took me so long, but I can see it now, I can see that you were always there for me. I’m thankful for that,” Nicole tried to dry her tears with the back of her hand.
“We are good, Nicole. You and I. And we can be as friends as we always were. Nothing changed. So please, stop crying. It’s ruining your pretty face.”
“Oh, you think my face is pretty? Sorry, Nonna, but you are not my type,” the redhead teased.
“Not your type? Really? I remember you used to say my ass was top-shelf,” Wynonna replied.
“I was drunk when I said that,” Nicole waved off.
“Waverly still hates when I talk to her about it,” Wynonna chuckled. “She always had eyes just for you. You both did, I guess.”
“She is the best person in this world.”
“That she is,” Wynonna agreed. “She deserves to hear that from you.”
“Do you think I’m worthy of her?”
“You have got to stop doubting yourself, Nicole. You were always the one she loved. You will always be. She still daydreams about you, just like she did when we were in high school.”
“Is she at home now?” Nicole asked.
“Yeah, she’s watching Alice for me,” Wynonna told her.
“Is it alright if I go there to talk to her?”
“Of course, Nicole. You are always welcome to my home, even when I’m not there,” Wynonna squeezed her friend’s hand.
“I’ll stop by then,” Nicole said. “There are some things that I have to say to Waverly.”
“Say… right, that’s how the kids talk about it these days, eh? Well, you do you.”
“Wynonna!”
“I’m messing with you, don’t worry. Go to the homestead and surprise my baby sister."
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Earp,” Nicole said.
“I’ll see you first, Haught-trot.”
(2005)
Nicole balanced her backpack over her shoulder and she was completely worn-out. It had been half an hour since the end of the game and the redhead was proud of herself. Their team had won the game, thanks to the two goals she scored. They were now going to the final game in a few weeks, which was going to be huge. The redhead walked all around school until she finally found who she was looking for. Waverly. She was alone, sitting at the steps in front of the building.
“Waves! I was looking for you.”
“Hi, Nicole. Congratulations on the win today! You were great.”
“Thanks. What are you doing here? Where is Wynonna?”
“Pete invited her to go somewhere and she left me behind, can you believe it?” Waverly was outraged. “What about you?”
“I wanted to know if you’d like to go out for a milkshake with fries,” Nicole sat next to the brunette.
“Shouldn’t you be celebrating with the team?”
“I don’t want to be with them. I want to celebrate with you.”
“Me? Why?”
“Because you are my favorite person in this world, pretty girl,” Nicole said.
“I think that would be Wynonna,” Waverly nervously chuckled.
“Nah, I just let Wynonna think that,” Nicole joked. “And I’ll be off to college in a few months, so I’d like to hang out with you as much as possible. Unless you’re too tired of me.”
“That will never, ever happen. I will always want to be around you,” Waverly rushed to say.
“So… milkshake and fries?”
“Yeah, let’s go.”
Nicole shook off the memory as soon as she arrived at the Homestead. She smiled when she saw Waverly sitting at the steps on the front porch. She had a book in her hands and next to her, a cup of what Nicole guessed was tea.
“Nicole! Hey.”
“Hi, pretty girl.”
“Is everything alright?”
“Yes, all good,” Nicole sighed and sat next to her. “I had a really good day and I wanted to share it with you.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I realized that I want to share all my good days with you, Waves. I know that I have been kind of a weigh on you lately,” Nicole said. “I am sorry that I lied to you before and it took me so long to tell you the truth about my baggage, but I promise it will never happen again. I won’t be a burden for you anymore.”
“You were never a burden, Nicole. Never,” Waverly stated firmly. “Please, don’t think about yourself like this.”
“Can you forgive me Waves? For hurting you and making you worry so much.”
“Of course, Nicole. I understand why you did it, and I trust you completely. Don’t doubt it.”
“I don’t know if I tell you this as much as I should, but you are extraordinary. For years, I have been looking for ways that would make me feel numb because it was all too much. But whenever I am with you, that’s not what I want, it’s not how I feel. And that doesn’t mean I just want to rely on you, but you inspire me so much. You are so important to me. When I lay eyes on you, it’s like I’m flying, like I am exploding with happiness and love. You are a ray of sun, Waverly. You are all I can think about and I don’t want to get you out of my mind, I just…”
Nicole couldn’t continue because there were some lips over hers. Waverly's lips. Soft, sweet, warm lips. She surrendered the second she felt small hands holding her red hair. Their mouths were not moving much, but Nicole was sure that whatever she thought happiness felt like, it couldn’t compare to Waverly Earp kissing her. She doubted anything in the world could overcome that. When the brunette broke the kiss, moving her head away, Nicole went forward, wishing she could still have those lips on her, she wasn’t ready to let go yet.
She opened her eyes and notice that Waverly was staring at her with so much hope. Nicole's lips turned into a smile and the brunette joined her with a giggle, touching the dimples on her cheeks.
“Nicole… Are you…”
“I never allowed myself to think about it, about you, because I know I’m not enough, no one will ever be good enough for you, Waverly Earp, but screw it,” Nicole was out of breath. “I was never selfish when it came to you, but I’ll be now. I want you, Waverly. I want us, and if there is a chance that you still want me even a tiny bit I’ll fight for it. I’ll be better and stronger than ever. I’ll be anything you want me to be if…”
Once again, Waverly's lips were on hers, shutting her. This time, though, they were hungry and messy. They were fast and claiming for her. Waverly made a delicious noise when Nicole threw an arm around her, joining their bodies closer. The redhead was not able to think about anything that wasn’t the heat inside of her, it was almost like her brain was short-circuiting.
They were breathless when they parted again, but this time, Nicole didn’t want to open her eyes. If it was all a dream, she wanted to live in it forever.
“I just want you,” Waverly whispered when she joined their foreheads. “Exactly the way you are.”
“Will you go on a date with me?” Nicole talked so fast that her lungs almost burned inside of her.
“A date?” Waverly said amazed like she couldn’t believe it was happening. She started giving lots of small kisses all over Nicole's face. “Yes, yes, I’d love to.”
“When is a good day?”
“Sunday?”
“Perfect,” Nicole moved closer to one more kiss. “Your lips are so soft and sweet.”
“So don’t ever stop kissing them,” Waverly teased.
“Oh, I don’t plan on making such a mistake, Miss Earp.”
“Is it Miss Earp now? I think I like it,” Waverly giggled.
“I aim to please,” Nicole smirked.
“Auntie Waverly, where are you?” Alice screamed from inside.
“Over here on the porch, pumpkin.”
“She really is Wynonna’s daughter,” the redhead said and it earned her a pinch from Waverly.
“Hi, Nicole.”
“Hello, Alice. How are you today?”
“I am nuts. I need help with my history homework, Aunt Waverly.”
“Go inside and I’ll be there in a second to help you, sweetheart.”
“Alright,” the little girl sounded defeated. “Bye, Nicole.”
“Bye, Alice. Good luck,” the redhead said when the girl crossed the door. “I guess I should leave you to go there and save her life.”
“I don’t want you to go,” Waverly threw herself over Nicole in a tight hug.
“Don’t worry, we’ll see each other again in no time. Besides, I have to prepare everything for our date, I want it to be perfect,” Nicole kissed the woman in her head.
“It will be perfect no matter what we do,” Waverly pecked the redhead on the lips. “Call me later? I want to hear your voice before I go to sleep.”
“Of course,” Nicole leaned for one more kiss. She was sure she was already addicted to those lips. “I’ll talk to you later, pretty girl.”
When she approached her car, she couldn’t help but look back and smile at the woman on the porch. Waverly hadn’t moved yet and Nicole felt like she was flying above the clouds. She had to plan the perfect date.
You never love yourself half as much as I love you
And you'll never treat yourself right, darling, but I want you to
If I let you know, I'm here for you
Maybe you'll love yourself like I love you
And I've just let these little things slip out of my mouth
'Cause it's you, oh, it's you, it's you they add up to
And I'm in love with you and all these little things