Knight of the Cunt's Table
HE STOLE A GLANCE at his older sister. Pam is beautiful. With long, brown curls cascading down a snow white shoulder, and her wide, brown eyes, the color of melted honey, it is no wonder why she's called the most beautiful woman in the kingdom. And with her tragic story of being cursed when she was a mere baby, the whole kingdom falls further under her spell.
It’s not that Tine hated his big sister. He loved her, and his heart does ache at the thought that one day, his sister would prick her thumb on a spinning needle and fell into a hundred years old sleep. But he’s tired of everything being revolved around Pam. He knew Pam has a destiny hanging on her head. He also knew that he is a perfectly ordinary prince with no premonitions.
When he was born, a mere 2 years younger than Pam, there was no festival for him, for the country is still mourning. He was too young to throw a tantrum he guess. When he was nine, he was handed to his father’s knight to be made squire without any fanfare. Still fine with that. When he was sixteen, the age of adulthood, his father forgot all about him, and he only had a small party with his band of brotherhood while the rest of his family went gallivanting because Pam wanted to see the beach, and the pretty princess must have what she wants at all times. When he was hospitalized at the infantry, sick from the fever, his mother came once to visit him, but dare not do more for fear that she will contract something he’s carrying and give it to Pam, expediting her catastrophic curse.
It was probably during that time, when he was sniffling for his mother under the sterilized blanket that he started despising his sister. It opened his eyes to how much devotion was fixed on his sister while he had to grovel for a moment’s notice by his own parents. He received more attention from the castle’s help and his circle of friends, who he could confidently say pretty much raised him in isolation of his parents’ care.
“AND THERE’S A NEW RECORD!” Ohm announced loudly at the bar. Tine sat beside him, nursing his beer as he wallowed in self-pity. “18 birthdays ruined! I have to admit, even Phuak doesn’t seem to have a shot of beating you!”
“Fuck you, Ohm,” he downed the glass. He loved his best friend, but he is literally seconds away from throttling him.
“Lay off, Ohm.” Phuak, ever the sound of reason, said flatly. “Tine have had enough crap to deal with.” Ohm pouted but decided to not pursue it. Tine was grateful to Phuak, but he felt worse off. Fong looked at him supportively from the opposite of the table, and Tine knew that the younger man was trying to cheer him up.
18 birthdays ruined, though.
It is almost impressive, to be honest, how Pam had managed to hijack every single birthday parties that he have. It would always start normally enough. But there would always be somebody looking for the King and Queen’s favour, and the easiest path there is to always honor Pam, the favourite child.
“Anyway, apple of my eye, sun of my dawn,” Ohm grinned. “We have some plans for you, Tine dearie.”
“Why do my gut feeling says that I will not like whatever this is?” he retorted back.
“Because you are a pussy, and you never even have a toe out of the line.”
Young men of a certain gentry are expected to act in a manner that will reflect well upon their family. The heir of an aristocrat does not live a life that is their own. The eldest daughters of nobility are married off for money and land, they are expected to bear children, preferably sons, as soon as possible. Eldest sons are to be perfect imitations of their fathers and they are to marry noble girls that they may not like, who often do not like them in return. He will marry for her dowry, and she will marry for his nobility.
Then they have children and their children marry people they do not like, and they have children, and those children marry and so on and so forth. Each of them carry the burden of not only their own life but the legacy of their family as well. It is a blessing in disguise to be the heir to a fortune. When you are an heir you are treated to the best food, the best wine, the best clothes, yet expected to perform perfectly in every aspect of life. You must be well read, well spoken, cultured, poised, all while keeping your wits about you.
There are very few times in a young noble's life that they are able to cut loose from their parents watchful eye. More than anything the scrutiny of others is hardest to escape, because regardless of how sneaky you might think you've been, there will always be rumor that reaches back to your family. But while growing up, it is nearly as much a need to rebel as it is to breathe. Even if it is only in the smallest of ways. It's not all late nights and drunken stupors, at least, not for Tine. The ways in which he rebels are small and seemingly silly to his friends. Perhaps leaving the first few buttons of your shirt undone until someone tells you to do them up, sleeping in later than he should, or mucking about with the servants, and once in a blue moon traipsing off to a friend's house without telling anyone.
Tine Teepakorn is not the type to rebel, he listens to his minders, and when he is asked to do something, he does it without question. It isn't that he never gets the fleeting fancy to run off with his friends and get drunk on commoner's wine. Though from time to time he allows himself to do just that if the risk of it is slim. But he has more to lose than they do. If they make a mistake there is someone else to take their place. But Tine is the lone heir to his family's legacy, the only legitimate heir at the very least. He never allows himself to go out and flirt, or dance, or make a scene and it irritates his friends to no end.
They would often bring him tales of wild nights and misadventures in an attempt to make him join in on their shenanigans. Ohm would speak of a girl he nearly bed, and Phuak would speak of the wine and dancing he'd missed, while Fong would weave a tale of some fantastical near miss with death or the law. In all honesty it was tempting, sometimes he wished they wouldn't tell him these stories if only to spare him the slow and agonizing passage of his youth. It felt like he was living vicariously through them, yet missing every opportunity to have adventures for himself.
As a group they would always gather at Teepakorn castle, as it was the largest of all of their homes and there were never any siblings around to pester them. There weren’t nearly as many listening ears and mouths willing to snitch on them and their exploits. Though there were servants, but they could always be bribed. It's not as if Tine had anything more than a handful of passing flings and drunken nights to be exploited as it is. But it is best to have any rumors contained, especially when his friends are often such scoundrels. They are aristocrats too after all, and it would be tragic to tarnish their reputations.
Phuak and Fong are both dukes with important family ties and money to spare. They're somehow loosely related to the Teepakorns though neither side could quite tell you how. They've got the same sharp nose on them and have got to be at least distant cousins. Ohm is a first born although not a sole heir, he has five siblings as well as six half siblings. His father has mistresses to spare and Ohm takes after him in this aspect. He could charm the clothes off of nearly anyone and he uses it to his advantage at every turn. It only makes it worse that he is ridiculously attractive. He has said time and time again that if he is ever cut off, which is very likely considering how shameless he is, that he will simply find someone willing to pay for his lavish lifestyle. It is hard to tell whether or not he is joking about this or not.
The lot of them lounge about a table which is scratched, dented, and beaten to hell. They hide it whenever the Teepakorn parents are about so they won't toss it out. It was a memento from the time they'd gotten wasted, this time Tine included, and stole the ugly thing from a pub. It is still sticky and horrendous to look at regardless of how many times it's been washed and buffed by the servants. It is an old pub table and it would stick out like a sore thumb among all of the grandeur of the Teepakorn mansion regardless of what they do to it. The juxtaposition of it makes them look like a band of misfits who only stumbled upon luxury perchance and they are rather fond of the idea.
The table is only brought out for the worst of offences. If there is a chance they might be disowned arrested or killed the plan was always hatched around the table which had been lovingly dubbed the cunt's counter. Tonight's suggestion is especially heinous, not just because it was worse than anything they'd done before, but this time they have refused to let Tine bow out.
"I would sooner be tried as a witch than let you miss this party." Ohm said crossing his arms over his chest and looking sternly at Tine.
"You would undoubtedly die a horrible death; you aren't much of a saint." Tine retorted, hoping he might shift the topic away from him, or at least away fro the party.
"I may be sinful, but I've obviously been blessed by god." He said gesturing to himself then settling his elbows on the table and his chin in his hands to frame his face. He stared wide eyed in faux innocence at Tine and he nearly laughed, as Ohm is the least innocent of any one of them.
"Aren't you full of yourself today." Said Tine cracking a smile and rolling his eyes as he leaned back in his chair.
"He's been buzzed since noon." Fong said with a small laugh as Ohm grabbed a coaster off the table and chucked it at him. It missed by half a foot without even a flinch from Fong. Ohm sunk back into his chair sulking.
"Well that explains it." Tine said as if the matter had been resolved. "You'll sober up and let me off the hook, I have no reason to go and we would surely be caught." He nodded to Phuak and Fong expecting them to back him up like they normally did when Ohm thought up something insane. But when he looked over neither of them were quite looking him in the eye.
Phuak sighed and when he finally looked at Tine his expression was steely. "We talked about it on the way over and he may be a drunkard, but he's right." This pushed Fong to speak up too.
"You haven't been caught once! What's the worst they could do to you?" Tine took a breath in, intending to list a dozen things that could potentially go wrong. But before he was able to Ohm slammed his fist on the table and it shook so violently, as if it might topple to pieces. "Be bold! For once in your life!"
Surprised by the outburst Tine stuttered looking shocked "I- well- you know I can't-" Tine said haltingly, but Phuak cut him off.
"We've already got a plan, so just listen." Phuak opened his leather-book planner. "This is gonna be the best night of our lives!!!"