Xue Yang/Wei Wuxian
In a good universe, they are mad scientist boyfriends that raise the dead together and sometimes their sexytimes are interrupted by someone freezing mid-thrust and going “you know what would be THE MOST INTERESTING IDEA???”
In a bad universe, the same as the above right up until WWX finds out XY has been supplementing their stock of corpses by adding to it
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nhs/wwx
They read SO MUCH porn. Sometimes they even try to mimic the positions and stuff, but half the time it’s honest-to-god appreciation for the skills, flexibility, and enterprising spirit of other people
also WWX is a notorious kept househusband and he LOVES it. rubs it in everyone else’s faces first chance he gets and every time again afterwards
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Madam Jin, Lan Qiren, and Wen Ruohan
One night, excessive amounts of alcohol and something mixed in with the incense that shouldn’t have been, and a solemn vow on every party involved to never speak of it again. ever.
it was Madame Jin’s wedding night and her husband had gone off to fuck some prostitutes so she went to go be a good hostess instead and it went off the rails
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Jiang Cheng/Wei Wuxian
Jiang Cheng likes to leave gifts in places that Wei Wuxian will invariably find them while maintaining plausible deniability (not very plausible, mind you) that the gift was something he spent time and effort and thought on finding and obtaining
Wei Wuxian will throw the presents he gets (and/or invents) into Jiang Cheng’s face with a “look at the awesome present I got you, loser” sort of attitude
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meng yao/jiang cheng
Post-Sunshot Campaign, Jin Guangyao really gets off on being the one with all the power in the relationship and keeps doing little things that rub Jiang Cheng’s face in it. Luckily, this feeds into Jiang Cheng’s secret humiliation kink so he’s mostly okay with it.
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Nie Mingjue/Wen Qing
Sometimes Nie Mingjue will comment that he suspects Wen Qing likes his arms more than she likes him. She assures him that he has many other body parts that she appreciates equally. It turns into a long-running in-joke between them, with increasingly less likely body parts getting named (“you only love me for my ossicles!”)
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Yu Ziyuan/Wen Qing
Wen Qing went to Lotus Pier as a promising young doctor already well known in her profession, with a chip on her shoulder in the event anyone tried to question her because of her gender or youth, and all her careful planning about maintaining a good reputation went straight out the window when she fell head-over-heels in lust for Madame Yu about 15 minutes into the proceedings.
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Jiang Chen/Wen Ning
Sometimes during summer, when things are quiet and a bit too hot, Jiang Cheng likes to lie with his head in Wen Ning’s lap because Wen Ning’s icy hands feel wonderful on his head. Wen Ning likes it too because it means Jiang Cheng trusts him with his neck.
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Wen Zhuliu/Wen Qing
They messed around a few times in a hall closet in the Nightless City before Wen Qing realized that he mostly liked her because she was a more legitimate Wen than he was and dumped his ass - but only after she got some more measurements about his core-melting ability for a future research paper.
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Wen Qing/Jiang Yanli
Wen Qing secretly likes it when Jiang Yanli does her hair up fancy for a dinner party where they will swan in and spend the entire time giggling to each other instead of socializing.
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lxc/jgy
Jin Guangyao uses his Watchtowers to keep an eye out for any rare books or artifacts or teas that he can gift to Lan Xichen because he wants to give him the best of everything. Lan Xichen spends months growing flowers to gift to Jin Guangyao because he wants him to know much he’s thinking about him all the time.
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Nie Mingjue/Wei Ying
Nie Mingjue likes Wei Wuxian’s ridiculous research jags where he’ll be up 24/7 with experiments and scribbling down ideas, because when he collapses for the invariable 3 day post-research crash Nie Mingjue will pick him up and take him to bed and take care of him. Wei Wuxian makes it his personal mission to try to see if how late he can keep Nie Mingjue in bed with him on those days.
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jin ling / oyzz
OYZZ loves the classic romantic tropes when it comes to setting up dates. JL’s idea of a good date is to go for a totally regular run-of-the-mill night hunt and, when asked why he considered it a good date, will blush and mutter something about spending any sort of time with him being the best sort of date, at which point OYZZ just melts into a giant pile of person and never lets JL live it down, ever.
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Jin Zixuan/Wei Wuxian
Jin Zixuan is the worst at flirting out of everyone Wei Wuxian has ever met - even Lan Wangji has more game than he does. Luckily for Jin Zixuan, Wei Wuxian finds every single attempt Jin Zixuan makes at flirting incredibly funny and also endearing and is constantly both A, laughing at him and B, nudging him to do more of it.
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Xue Yang/Jiang Cheng
Jiang Cheng spends a lot of time wondering how in the world, and why, he ended up harboring a murderous criminal demonic cultivator that he’s, like, 90% sure only likes him because of the things he can remember about Wei Wuxian.
Xue Yang spends a lot of time resisting the urge to pinch Jiang Cheng’s cheeks and call him an adorably gullible idiot that he now officially feels too bad to scam any more, because that is not their dynamic but it could be
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Wen Ruohan/Lan Qiren
It seemed like a good idea, once. Lan Qiren still thinks the relationship was worthwhile, if only because it gave birth to his lifelong passion for the study of ethics and moral behavior
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A-Qing, Lan Jingyi, Jin Ling
It is definitely against some sort of cultivator rule to be dating a ghost, but neither of them have ever quite had the time or interest to look it up. A-Qing sometimes compares living (not-living?) with them to living with Xiao Xingchen and Xue Yang and mostly concludes that they both share aspects of XXC’s too-good-for-this-world-to-the-point-of-being-a-little-dumb-ness and XY’s tendency to get into fights, and that it suits her very well, thank you.
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Wen Ning/Nie Huaisang
Wen Ning likes to watch Nie Huaisang sleep since he doesn’t need to, even though he knows, objectively, that it’s kind of creepy. It’s the best sleep Nie Huaisang has had in years because it’s the first time he’s felt safe since Nie Mingjue died.
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NMJ/JC
Nie Mingjue will sometimes hold Jiang Cheng down by physical force and tell him all the nice things he thinks about him, or that he did in a given week. Jiang Cheng struggles horribly each time, kicking and cursing and asking who the hell NMJ thinks he is, but he’s always coming back for more. If NMJ ever misses a week, he’ll starts sulking dramatically.
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suibian/wangji
Suibian is good at sharp, hard, uncomfortable truths, and one of them is that the sound of its blade sounds perfect against the background of Wangji’s gentle strumming and that it will probably never hear that sound again.
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Wen Xu/Nie Mingjue
Wen Xu thinks he’s better than everybody, or that he should be, and it drives him absolutely mad that he knows that Nie Mingjue exceeds him in several ways. That’s the only reason he spends so much time thinking about Nie Mingjue. Really. He swears.
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NMJ/JYL
Jiang Yanli legitimately likes how inflexible Nie Mingjue is about most things. He will always listen to her and take her views into account, but once he makes a decision he won’t budge from it absent new information, and it gives her a sense of security that she’s not going to turn around one day to find that all the rules of their relationship have suddenly changed.
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xxc/lwj
They spend a lot of time talking about classic texts, debating the meaning of each phrase and how it would apply in different situations. It bores the living daylights out of everyone except for Lan Qiren, and even he gets tired of how long they can go at it; almost nobody realizes that it’s their way of flirting with each other in public.
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Yu Ziyuan/Cangse Sanren
It was messy, complicated, probably unhealthy - even toxic - and absolutely wonderful for the very short time that it lasted. There was a lot of wrestling for dominance involved since both of them prefer to be the aggressor.
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mianmian and jiang cheng
He scooped her up when she left her sect in a huff, because the Jiang sect is literally always recruiting. They only started dating years later, after she’d moved from organizing his life as sect leader to organizing his personal life and, really, if she’s going to be doing that, she might as well get the perks of the position.
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Song Lan/ Lan Xichen
Post-canon, they meet next to a lake with a weeping willow and sit together for hours and hours on end, not saying a word and just appreciating the company of someone who has experienced loss the way they have. After literal months of this, Lan Xichen accidentally sneezes and Song Lan says something and suddenly the words are just pouring out of them, everything they’d been thinking and not-saying for years on end.
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wen zhuliu/madame yu
They cultivated together when they were younger, going on night-hunts and sparring against each other - often on the night-hunts when Jiang Fengmian had unexpected abandoned Yu Ziyuan to run off somewhere with Wei Changze and Cangse Sanren. They enjoyed honing their skills on each other, and for a while Yu Ziyuan wondered if Wen Zhuliu - although that wasn’t his surname back then - would offer her a courting gift, but he never did, too consumed by his insecurities and obsession with status to do so.
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JGY/WQ
They met in the Nightless City, with Wen Qing providing Meng Yao with medical help - first to him, and later to his victims. He liked how proud she was, her strength being held down only by Wen Ruohan’s ruthlessness, and the way she assumed he was surnamed Jin at first; someone had apparently told her that he was Jin Guangshan’s son and it never occurred to her that he might be an unrecognized bastard.
He once considered rescuing Wen Ning and the others of her kin from the work camp as a matter of beneficence, announcing it to be a wedding gift for the woman who’d helped him so much while he was undercover - a fairytale romance with a happy ending, the sort that moved the heart to hear it, and never mind that she’d never actually agreed to marry him since she obviously would if it was in exchange for her family - but in the end Qin Su, with her powerful father, was a more expedient choice to advance his ambitions in Lanling.
He had cause to regret his practicality, later.
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Lan Qiren, Cangse Sanren, Jiang Fengmian
Cangse Sanren left behind any number of disappointed suitors, of which Lan Qiren and Jiang Fengmian were only two, but they were the furthest extremes: Lan Qiren was driven mad by her, while Jiang Fengmian was mad about her. She sometimes wondered if there was a chance they could get together - she would have been far more interested in the combination of the two than either of them apart.
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3zun
When he schemed to turn their sworn brotherhood into something more, Jin Guangyao thought that Lan Xichen would be the romantic one of the three of them, but it turned out to be Nie Mingjue, who added planning out thoughtful gifts and enjoyable dates to his extremely short list of hobbies. Lan Xichen turned out to be the one with a gigantic list of sexual positions he wanted to try out and a list of kinks nearly as long; when Jin Guangyao expressed surprise at this to Nie Mingjue, the other man just rolled his eyes and told him that leaving Nie Huaisang with Lan Xichen for too long was how his little brother had developed such an appreciation for certain springtime artwork and also this was
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Madam Lan and Cssr
Cangse Sanren never asked the future Madame Lan to murder that teacher for his dishonorable suggestion to her, and never would have, and the fact that she thought that she would have, enough even to act on it, was the reason they could never have ended up together in the long run.
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NHS/LWJ
Living in a sect as inclined towards violence as the Nie sect long ago taught Nie Huaisang the beauty unique to something that has been broken and carefully, painstakingly put back together, the cracks of a porcelain vase now lined in gold. Putting Lan Wangji back together after the loss of Wei Wuxian will take a lifetime, but the results will be worth it - after all, he’s always liked pretty things, and Lan Wangji is the prettiest he’s ever seen.
(Wei Wuxian had taught Lan Wangji that love was a sudden spark of uncontrollable attraction, a tinder to a pile of kindling. The slow, leisurely way in which Nie Huaisang moved into his heart and made his home there took him entirely by surprise when he finally realized it years later.)
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Jiang Yanli/Wen Ning
Wen Ning followed Jiang Cheng off the mountain in Yiling because his sister was worried about post-operative complications and it was more convenient for him to go than her; Jiang Cheng got annoyed at him for following him around and stuck him in the same war camp as Jiang Yanli to make him stop.
He taught her everything he knew about medicine so that they could both help in the medic camps, telling her stories about his sister the doctor, and when Jin Zixuan accused her of trying to make it up to him, he stood up for her, stutter and all, and said that she couldn’t have been trying to court Jin Zixuan because she’d made him soup, too, and obviously there was no point in that.
After they married, he liked to brush her hair while she read novels out loud to him, and she liked to see if she could make him laugh. Their marriage is a quiet one, but happy, and their children will one day probably end up inheriting the Jiang sect if Jiang Cheng doesn’t get his act together already.
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Jiang Cheng/Nie Huaisang
Nie Huaisang thinks Jiang Cheng’s temper is the cutest thing ever and goes out of his way to provoke it. Jiang Cheng feels extremely helpless about this and is contemplating taking Nie Huaisang up on his offer to just put him over his knee and spank him when he does something too outrageous, but he suspects that will only make Nie Huaisang worse. (He’s right, too.)
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xue yang and mo xuanyu
It started with Xue Yang bullying the new kid that no one cared about because he was the new kid that no one cared about, Jin Guangyao’s little brother and by blood as far above him as you could get, but somewhere along the line the cute little kid that always called him gege and trailed after him like a lost little duckling got to be endearing, and Xue Yang doesn’t know what to do with that or what that means he should do about it. Possibly murder everyone that’s mean to him? He’s not sure, but he’s interested in finding out.
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Lan Qiren/ Jiang Fengman
It started at Wei Changze and Cangse Sanren’s wedding, and kept on going for longer than either of them had expected. Apart from the few times they meet - during a discussion conference or by chance - they never go looking for each other; the majority of it takes place via letter, and the medium suits them both very well.
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Xue Yang/Xiao Xingchen/Song Lan
Xue Yang’s jokes make Xiao Xingchen, who has a sense of humor, laugh, and Song Lan, who doesn’t, scowl, and he greatly enjoys both reactions - to think that he once thought that Song Lan was merely the price of admission to get Xiao Xingchen, when in fact having one of each flavor is far more decadent and enjoyable than he ever thought it would be.
Their school, when they finally get tired of travelling around enough to actually found it, has a branch dedicated to refining the mysteries of demonic cultivation, and means that they’re the only sect out there that accepts otherwise untalented people who have no hope of orthodox cultivation.
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jiang fengmian/madam yu
They love each other madly but are each convinced that the other one is only tolerating them, and barely at that. This is both because they have different ways of expressing affection - Yu Ziyuan by worrying over him and scolding him to demonstrate it, which he thinks means she’s angry at him, him through thoughtful gifts that she thinks are an attempt to buy her off - and because of the timing of when they fell for each other - Yu Ziyuan fell for him, hard, at a very early stage and was disappointed by his indifference and affection for other less suitable matches, while Jiang Fengmian had an abrupt realization somewhere along the line that he was in love with his wife and had been for years and also that he’d more than likely fucked up any chance he had of making it work.
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Nie Mingjue/Nie Huaisang
Nie Huaisang starts it, always, because Nie Mingjue is still worried (somehow, after all these years) that he’s pressuring him into it. Once they start, though, he’s more than willing to toss Nie Huaisang around as much as Nie Huaisang likes - and Nie Huaisang likes a great deal. He also enjoys being spoiled rotten, which coincidentally Nie Mingjue is also very good at…really, he has no idea why his big brother ever thought (or still secretly thinks) that he’s going to eventually go off and find someone better. and anyway when it comes to children they can always find a woman who’s willing to share, and spend the rest of their lives guessing who’s the father and who’s the uncle
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Lan Xichen/Jiang Cheng
The first ten years of their relationship was Lan Xichen trying to take care of Jiang Cheng, to help and heal him from the unbearable tragedies that he had suffered, while quietly growing to love him. The second ten years is the exact opposite, with Jiang Cheng making a habit of bursting into the hanshi where Lan Xichen is in seclusion damnit to bring him soup and yell at him for stupid things like not adequately laundering his forehead ribbon until Lan Xichen can think of something, anything, other than what he’d done.
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Jin Zixuan / Jiang Cheng
Even after Jiang Yanli is happily married to someone else, Jiang Cheng still can’t quite shake the feeling that he stole Jin Zixuan away from her, and he feels a little guilty about the thrill that gives him. Jin Zixuan, for his part, has no idea how he spent all those years missing the fact that this awkward graceless idiot was so fucking cute (and a truly terrifying cultivator worthy of marrying - nobody loves the phrase “if you’re going to anger someone, don’t anger Jiang Cheng” more than he does, because for once everyone looks at him like he’s done something amazing that is totally unrelated to his birth).
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Su She/Jin Zixun
Su She was okay with the secrecy and the lies and the sinking suspicion that Jin Zixun only wanted to see him when it was convenient for him and never mind what was convenient for Su She, but being treated like nothing in public - like worse than nothing, like a whore that’d gotten ideas above their station and needed to be put back in their place - was why he decided it was worth risking his life to curse him. That Jin Zixun never once guessed that it might be him just confirmed to him that he’d made the right choice.
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JZX/WWX/LWJ
In the event his father ever asks, Jin Zixuan has a list of reasons why him getting together with Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji is a good thing: it adds two fearsome cultivators to the power of the Jin sect, it demonstrates their influence to others because he was able to land them, it reinforces their wealth since obviously he’s able to keep them in the lifestyles to which they are accustomed (endless inventing materials for Wei Wuxian, enough sets of white clothing for Lan Wangji). It’s a good list, but he still has no idea why they’re actually with him.
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Lan Yi/Madam Lan
Being a soul remnant, Lan Yi can go anywhere she likes in the Lan sect, even if she usually doesn’t, but the sad little girl who’s brave enough to tease someone she literally saw walk through a door is one of her favorite people to visit.
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Wen Ruohan and Jin Guangshan
Wen Ruohan thought it’d be funny to get Jin Guangshan, a notorious womanizer, drunk and take advantage of him the way he took advantage of all those young ladies that weren’t able to resist him. He wasn’t expecting Jin Guangshan to like it, or to keep coming around hinting that he’d be up for more of that which - no. That was not the point.
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Nie Huaisang/Qin Su
Nobody asked Nie Huaisang to marry Qin Su to cover up the unfortunate accident of her too-close relationship with her intended husband - both Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen were still processing what Jin Guangyao told them in a panic (Lan Xichen offered emotional support, Nie Mingjue offered to cut off Jin Guangshan’s head, it was very nice), and Nie Huaisang, ever superfluous to the conversation, decided to go make himself useful for once by offering some comfort to the lady in question.
He was not aware that the lady in question had not yet been informed of the issue, though in retrospect he should have, and somehow it ended up with him proposing to marry if she’d only stop crying - but after it worked, well, why not? They could always say that Jin Guangyao had been covering for them.
(Jin Guangyao took him aside to warn him that the child might end up stupid, but Nie Huaisang pointed out that it wouldn’t surprise anyone with him as the presumed parent.)
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Jiang Yanli, Lan Xichen, Mo Xunayu
Jiang Yanli didn’t have the face to go the Jin sect camp after the disastrous end of her engagement, so she went to the Lan sect, instead. She and Lan Xichen bonded immediately over the frankly hilarious interactions that happened every time Wei Wuxian came over from the Jiang sect front line to visit her and bumped into Lan Wangji.
They were still going back and forth internally over whether they were dating or not dating and whether they should just get married already - they’re both very nice and very accommodating of other people, and that makes it hard for either of them to just come out and say things about their feelings and what they want - when Lan Xichen went to visit Jin Guangyao and came back with a barnacle in the shape of Mo Xuanyu who desperately needed a small break from Lanling. At that point, every single one of Jiang Yanli’s older sister instincts were activated at once.
They ended up with Jiang Yanli as Lan Xichen’s first wife and Mo Xuanyu as his concubine - a bit of a shocker, for a Lan - but it works really well for all of them.
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Mianmian / Wen Ning
Wen Ning tries, on a semi-regular basis, to convince Mianmian that she can do better than a fierce corpse with a boatload of trauma, but she has exactly zero time for any of that. When she’s not looking at him, he stares at her with hearts in his eyes.
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NHS/LXC
Nie Huaisang likes to paint Lan Xichen, and the hanshi is full of the sketches he sent over or left behind, lovingly preserved and cataloged by date. Later, when Lan Xichen is in seclusion, he looks over them and thinks he can see in them the exact moment when Nie Huaisang gave up on him.
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LXC/WWX
It turned out that LWJ’s interest in WWX was only passing, but in trying to get them together, LXC spent a lot of time around WWX, and found that he made him laugh - a lot. He likes laughing. WWX, for his part, is unbelievably proud that he managed to land the #1 most eligible bachelor, even if he wasn’t aware that they were dating until LXC casually mentioned that it would be the anniversary of their first date soon - not that he’ll ever admit he didn’t know.
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wei wuxian with /both/ the twin jades of lan
Wei Wuxian yo-yos between being incredibly smug about it and also extremely tired because wow, the Lan sect is just…inexhaustible. No one ever sympathizes with his pain, though. Never.
(Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji like sharing things. It’s nice, familiar, comforting - and luckily they both like Wei Wuxian. Having Lan Xichen’s ability to tell people things directly made the entire process of courting him much smoother; if it was just Lan Wangji, he might never have said anything, and then where would they all be?)
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jin ling/lan jingyi
Jin Ling sometimes complains that he wishes he could have fallen for the smart Lan, the nice Lan, the polite Lan, not - this dumbass. Every time he does, Lan Jingyi just grins and says “so I’m irresistible is what you’re saying” and they get into a fight about it. Luckily, they both like fighting with each other - all that close quarters and grappling! - so it works out quite well.
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wn/wwx/lwj
The amount of time it takes both Wei Wuxian and Wen Ning to realize they’re in a three person relationship is truly stunning. Lan Wangji knew months before, but didn’t mention it because he assumed it was a given.
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nhs/jyl
It took a long time before Jiang Yanli stopped seeing Nie Huaisang as little brother material and started thinking of him as possible date material, even though he’s not much younger than Jin Zixuan. It was, and may yet be, the only endeavor to which Nie Huaisang truly devoted his heart and soul.
(Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian are not 100% sure how they feel about this development, but at least it’s better than that fucking peacock that broke her heart)
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qin su / mianmian
the Qin sect and the Jin sect are allies, so the two of them meet often, and bond over being actually nice instead of fake-nice the way so many Jin sect female cultivators are. It’s not until Mianmian, who agreed to stay in the Jin sect only for Qin Su’s sake, overhears the truth being revealed and tells Qin Su so that they can run away together that they realize that they actually like each other.
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lan sizhui/jin ling
Every single person who has ever met the two of them has asked, very politely, what in the world Lan Sizhui is thinking and is he aware that he can do better. Jin Ling included.
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Jiang Cheng/wen Zhuliu
Wen Zhuliu looks at Jiang Cheng and thinks of the Violet Spider in her prime. Jiang Cheng, captured by the Wens, does not appreciate his interest at all.
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Wen Zhuliu/Lan Xichen
He was promising, once, and admirably loyal to the sect master that raised him from nothing; he was flattering and intelligent, with interesting insights into the nature of cultivation given his own unique talents - Lan Xichen pitied him a little, and was warm to him, and there were a few kisses shared in a garden with a little thrill of excitement that came from being next to someone who was legitimately dangerous but chose not to be.
And then the Cloud Recesses burned, and Wen Zhuliu turned his face away, loyal to his master above even morality, and Lan Xichen felt lucky that he had never truly fallen in love with him.
Next time, he’ll pick a better type of person to trust.
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jin ling / ouyang zizhen / lan jingyi
This isn’t three people, one braincell - the braincell belongs to Lan Sizhui, and he is noping right out of this disaster. Also, they totally convince themselves that everything they do is just typical bros hanging out, right up to and including sharing a bed on a regular basis, until finally Lan Sizhui is begged by all the adults in the vicinity to put everyone out of their misery by just telling them that they’re dating already.
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Wen Ruohan/Wei Ying
Wei Wuxian is talented and brilliant, especially once he shows up with his new cultivation style, and Wen Ruohan believes all things that are special ought to be his own. Especially now that Wen Zhuliu is gone, how can he not be interested in possessing the newest thing available? (and yes, he did mean ‘thing’)
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wen ning/nie mingjue
Wen Ning develops a terrible crush, which he fully intends to do nothing about because obviously Nie Mingjue only sees him as a young brother at best and a charity case at worse, and also he should never have told NHS because now NHS is plotting to get them together. Send help, waiting online for an answer!
(NMJ is going to be oblivious right up until he’s not, as he usually is with these things)
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Xue Yang/Lan Wanji
Xue Yang just likes the tall, white-clad, virtuous righteous cultivator type, okay? And Lan Wangji isn’t the type of person who executes someone willy-nilly, so now he’s a prisoner of the Lan sect (boring!) but Lan Wangji is curious about how demonic cultivation works (not boring!) and - yeah, okay, maybe he’ll pretend to give this redemption thing a shot.
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Lan Wangji/Nie Mingjue
Lan Wangji has been quietly in love with Nie Mingjue since he was six, and he’s never changed his mind about anything important in his life. Now it’s just a matter of showing Nie Mingjue that he’s not just Lan Xichen’s little brother, but a man in his own right - and also a good match.
(Nie Mingjue spends the majority of Lan Wangji’s courting campaign having a minor breakdown over ‘oh no! my friend’s little brother turned hot! help! what do I do? no one can ever know!’ that turned out to be totally useless)
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Nie HuaiSang / Wei WuXian / Lan WangJi
Untamed verse
Nie Huaisang realizes pretty early on that he’s the lightbulb here, third-wheeling away on Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji’s adventure time date, but any time he tries to raise the subject to either of them they deny it. Which means they somehow don’t know that they’re meant to be together.
Clearly, it’s time for some matchmaking.
(It’s not his fault that Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are won over by the sheer cuteness of their very earnest and well-meaning matchmaker. At least this way he can live a life of leisure without worrying about being bullied?)
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Mo Xuanyu/ Nie Huaisang
Nie Huaisang wasn’t intended on getting involved with anyone, but Mo Xuanyu asked. It was meant to be just a favor - Mo Xuanyu was going to die, he wanted to die, he needed to die, and Nie Huaisang wasn’t going to stop him because he needed it too, but at least he could make sure the boy didn’t go off to his next life a virgin. He wasn’t expecting to get attached.
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Wei wuxian/wang lingjiao
Wang Lingjiao might be from a good family, but they’re not good people, and that meant she didn’t have any food to share with the hungry boys on the street, but at the very least she can teach them a few tricks - especially that new kid, the one whose parents were rogue cultivators that died unexpectedly - to help them last a little longer.
Years later, after her parents sold her to be a maid to a woman that hated her for being more attractive and after she sold herself to get away from her, they meet again. She barely even recognizes him.
After a while, though, she realizes that it’s not him that she can’t recognize. She’s the one that’s changed.
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Wen ZhuLiu x NIe Huaisang
Wen Zhuliu spends all his time around Wen Chao, who is coarse and crude and nothing at all the way he thought people from a grand old sect should be like. They should be more like the Lans, who are noble and refined, or the Jin, wealthy and arrogant, or even the Jiangs, spirited and chivalrous - and each and every one of those so far above him that he couldn’t even dream of touching the hem of their robes, even in the indoctrination camp where they’re technically prisoners.
Nie Huaisang isn’t like that, though. He’s small and gentle and easily frightened, like a little rabbit, and it makes him seem human. Makes him seem touchable, the way the other sect heirs aren’t.
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Qin Su/Jiang Yanli
It’s not that they were intending on having an affair (though is it really an affair when both of your husbands are aware, encouraging, and really into it?), but they are the only two young ladies in the Jin sect that have married in anytime recently, so they bond over that, and then Qin Su explained that for some reason Jin Guangyao isn’t coming to her bed anymore and, well…one thing led to another.
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LQR/WWX
Wei Wuxian goes back to Gusu to seek help with the problems demonic cultivation has caused him - and for that, he needs the help of an expert in cultivation-related research, which turns out to be (unexpectedly) Lan Qiren. And, listen, Wei Wuxian is weak to the combination of older man, mentor, and really cool research abilities, but that’s totally not his fault.
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Wen Ning / Qin Su
She finds him down in the basement, and it doesn’t matter what he’s done or why he’s there - what they’re doing to him is inhumane. She’s not entirely sure how they get from that to running away together, but at least it’s better than the farce of a marriage she’s been during for the past decade.
(Later, when Jin Guangyao tells her why, she understands - but that doesn’t mean she forgives him.)
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Jiang Yanli/Jin Guangyao
He likes taking her to parties where they can both be seen - where everyone can see that the bastard son of Lanling won the hand of the young lady of the Jiang sect, stealing away what ought to have been his legitimate brother’s.
Jiang Yanli doesn’t mind. Smug and satisfied is a good look on her little schemer.
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Madame Lan/Madame Yu/Madame Jin
Madame Yu and Madame Jin are tired of being the only two wives at the Discussion Conferences - the Wen sect doesn’t allow its women to go outside (creepy), the Nie sect hasn’t had a woman in the house in ages (the concubine that gave birth to the second young master was nice but died young), and damnit, they don’t care if Madame Lan is “sick”, they are going to march over there to visit.
She’s not sick, but she doesn’t come out, either - but that’s okay. They can introduce her to all the fun things they’ve been doing to fill the time while their husbands are busy with politics.
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Madam Jin/2nd Lady Mo
It’s not very complicated: Madame Jin takes a distinct pleasure in finding anyone who is stupid enough to bear a child for her husband and fucking them over.
sometimes, if they’re young and arrogant in a charming sort of way, she’ll fuck them first
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Mo Xuanyu/Jiang Cheng
Of the cultivators that visit Lanling during Mo Xuanyu’s time there, he thinks Jiang Cheng is the most attractive - yes, even above the supposedly higher-ranked Lan Xichen, who is way too close to Jin Guangyao for Mo Xuanyu to even dare look at him. He wonders, sometimes, what would happen if he just showed up to Jiang Cheng’s room late at night - just to see what it was like.
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Wen Qing/Jiang Cheng
He likes how headstrong she is - it means he never has to worry about scaring her with his wreck of a personality. She likes that he thinks he can take care of himself - he can’t, and she knows it, and it’s nice to be needed.
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Yu Ziyuan/Madam Lan & Jiang Fengmian/Lan Qiren
There is a very organized game of room-swapping going on during the Discussion Conferences set in Gusu, and everyone is trying very hard not to be noticed by everyone else. The younger generation mostly wants to die rather than think too much about it.
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Qin Su/Jiang Cheng
Jiang Cheng has always been the sort of person to envy what other people had, just because someone else wanting it was a good way to confirm it was something worth wanting. So when he gets offered the chance to marry Qin Su - pretty, submissive Qin Su, whose cultivation is decent but not great, who is a decent cook and an excellent hostess and comes from a good family - he’s up for it. So what if she rolled around in the sheets with Lianfeng-zun a few times? If anything, that’s a plus: she won’t be shocked and he won’t have to walk her through it.
(She says he’s better in bed, which makes him so very happy. What she means is that he’s easier to train, which makes her happy, and really, isn’t that what’s important?)
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Wen Xu/NHS
For many people, their first crush is someone unattainable - far enough away to be safe. For others, their first crush is the bad boy type that they’d never actually want to be with in real life, for much the same reasons.
What Nie Huaisang is saying, okay, is that he’s totally normal. Just because Wen Xu is a fucking psychopath that he wants to die a horrible death doesn’t mean he’s not going to do a little bit of fantasizing; the guy’s a really snappy dresser and his face isn’t bad either, though the personality is a total loss.
Might even flirt a bit over dinner, since obviously it’s not like Wen Xu would ever be interested in -
shit.
Da-ge, help! I wasn’t serious!
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XXC/SL/JYL
Jiang Yanli liked them the moment she met them. The idea of a school based on affection, not blood - it’s pretty tempting, and man, would she ever love to get out of Lanling. But obviously they’re far too young for her - teenagers, when she’s already in her mid-twenties, a widow, and raising a baby alone. It’s not a huge age difference, barely a handful of years, but it feels like a lifetime. But she can definitely go teach at their school!
Xiao Xingchen grew up on a celestial mountain, so he has to check with Song Lan about whether all volunteer teachers are this pretty and nice and sweet and gentle and - no, you just have a crush, so do I, what do we do about it?!
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JGY/WWX
Jin Guangyao is greedy for power. Wei Wuxian’s power is seductive, not just for Jin Guangshan, but for Jin Guangyao, too - and he’s so good at smiling at him, at being kind to him in a cultivation world that has left him behind. Surely it wouldn’t be that hard to obtain him?
(Wei Wuxian misses people, but he’s not dumb. There’s something up with this guy.)
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Jiang Fengmian and Wen Ruohan
Wen Ruohan is arrogant and vain, and hates anyone who puts themselves above him - not that that’s a problem with Jiang Fengmian, who’s so calm and peaceful and stupid. He almost wants to break the man just to see what would look like to see an actual reaction out of him.
Wen Ruohan isn’t good at resisting his impulses. How hard can it be, once the Lotus Pier has fallen, to see what it’d be like?
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wen ning/jin zixuan
Wen Ning isn’t sure how he ended up on the arm of Jin Zixuan - possibly black magic, but not his own, because last he remembers he was in a work camp - but Jin Zixuan is making a point to his father and he’s going all in on it.
(Wen Ning is nice, and sweet, and cooks well, and - Jin Zixuan wonders guiltily if it’s wrong that the only thing that was the matter with Jiang Yanli was her gender?)
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mo xuanyu/wen ning
After they ran away from Lanlig together, they live in a little town that they found, just the two of them. Wen Ning still remembers how to grow radishes, and Mo Xuanyu can mend clothing, and every once in a blue moon they’ll go on a night hunt because Wen Ning can do that. They’re happy as long as no one finds them.
Pity it can’t last.
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jgy/su she
Su She adores Jin Guangyao without reservation, because he feels like he sees him, like he values him, the way no one has valued him before.
Jin Guangyao likes Su She. He’s useful.
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nhs/jzx
Nie Huaisang likes being spoiled, especially with gifts - he grew up never doubting his brother’s love, but damnit sometimes a man wants presents, okay? The only way Jin Zixuan ever learned to express affection was through spending money. Between the two of them, they’ll work it out - and single-handedly revitalize the entire local economy.
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madam jin/madam yu
They tell everyone they were friends as girls. They don’t mention the sleepovers or the drinks they shared, the kisses under moonlight or the “practice” for their future husbands - there’s no point in thinking about that anymore.
Sometimes you have to grow up.
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nie mingjue/jin zixuan
Nie Mingjue pretended not to know who the new “rogue cultivator” that joined his forces is - he understands the desire to see if you’d make something of yourself without your birth. So he treats Jin Zixuan just the way he would any other promising young cultivator.
How this led to Jin Zixuan having a deep infatuation with him, he has no idea.
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song lan/wen ning
Eternity is a long time to spend by yourself as a fierce corpse that’s still conscious. Wen Ning apologizes for fighting Song Lan, Song Lan apologizes for fighting back, and at some point it just becomes easier to travel together than apart - they’re mostly just night-hunting, after all.
A lot of things are easier, when you’re together.
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LSZ/LJY/OYZZ/JL
It is totally normal for friends who have gone through life and death together to be super close. Totally normal.
(also, having three boyfriends is super convenient from a planning perspective. if one person is too busy, there’s still someone else to go with you to fancy parties and have dinner and share a bed - so no one ends up lonely!)
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Jin Guangyao/Xue Yang
Jin Guangyao is nice, Jin Guangyao is gentle; he is caring, friendly, even indulgent - he’ll give Xue Yang everything he could ever want. And yet at the same time, Xue Yang is painfully aware that Jin Guangyao can change his mind at any time, and he’ll have nothing again - Jin Guangyao makes sure he knows that.
The sex is good, but is anything really worth your freedom?
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Jiang Cheng and Lan Qiren
Lan Qiren has explicitly banned school-era roleplay from their bedroom. Jiang Cheng spends a lot of time fantasizing about it anyway.
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XYxWWXxMY
Xue Yang is the first one to get a reputation as a delinquent, but they’re all like that, really - Xue Yang, the baby who liked the world until it crushed him under foot; Wei Wuxian, whose parents left on a night hunt and never came back and who never got rescued by anyone; and the oldest of the group, Meng Yao, a prostitute’s son who wanted something better out of his life but never managed to make it all the way to Lanling, getting stuck in Kuizhou instead.
Wei Wuxian is the one who invents demonic cultivation for the three of them because they’re “too old” to cultivate the orthodox way, and they go from being some random street kids with an issue to being big shots almost overnight. They go to the Yiling Burial Mounds to fish up some more people for their growing army of fierce corpses and get tagged as the Yiling Demonic Sect, led by the Yiling Patriarch.
It’s a role Meng Yao takes on with relish.
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LWJ/JC/WWX
Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng built their friendship on sharing resources, whether material or emotional, with each other. And they do mean sharing everything. So obviously, once they make up with each other, there’s a whole world of brand new experiences to share with each other.
Lan Wangji still kind of hates Jiang Cheng’s guts, but the sex is - you know what, on second thought, he’s fine with it. Watching Jiang Cheng limp for a day after getting tossed around all night is its own sweet type of catharsis.
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wen xu crushing on lwj
Untamed verse
Wen Xu was always going to take Lan Wangji back to the Nightless City as a hostage, even though his father would have preferred Lan Xichen. There was no way he was giving up this opportunity to have the cold young man all to himself.
It’s a long trip.
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Wen Xu/Wen Qing
They fought a lot when they were kids, and fought even more when they were young adults because of the sinking suspicion that someone, somewhere, was going to make them marry each other to keep the bloodline in the family - they were distant enough that it wouldn’t have been taboo, but also, they hate each other for childhood sins they don’t even remember committing.
(at some point Wen Xu stops being afraid and starts anticipating - and that’s when Wen Qing learns how to throw needles)
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Nie Huaisang/Xue Yang
Untamed verse
Xue Yang is Meng Yao’s prisoner, and Nie Huaisang is only along for the ride. But he’s never met such an unapologetic murderer before, so he sneaks over to him late one night on the trip back to Qinghe. “Tell me,” he says, leaning in with a conspiratorial smile on this face. “What did they do to deserve it?”
Xue Yang falls in love.
(This is a problem for everyone.)
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JGY/NHS/LXC
NHS’s plan had always been to be the useless younger brother, beneath notice; he never expected them to be interested in him like that - like an adult, like the adult he is. But there’s more than one way to be beneath notice, and this way he gets to have some fun before everything else.
(JGY and LXC find it charming the way NHS laughs until he almost cries whenever he comes. It’s almost as if he knows a joke that he won’t tell them.)
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3zun/NHS
NHS has been daydreaming about LXC since childhood, and NMJ as soon as he learned what “taboo” was, and Meng Yao - he always did like Meng Yao. Best of all, Meng Yao has that wonderful lack of morality that will make him an excellent partner in convincing the others to participate as well…through dirty tricks, if necessary.
(most 3zun/NHS fics are the three of them on him, but in fact it's NHS & MY vs LXC and NMJ, and Team Sneak is winning hands down)
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Wen Zhuliu/Jiāng Cheng taking place in the past of the LWJ/JC/WWX. How would either of they react too JC having a panic attack in the middle of it when one gets a little too handsy with the scar on his chest
LWJ holds onto him, letting him take comfort in the steadiness of his arms and the calm he exudes, while WWX would prattle on and on about nothing in particular, knowing that success will be JC rolling his eyes at him - nothing can be that bad if WWX is spouting bullshit.
Neither of them comment on the matter exactly, not to JC - it was war, after all, and many people suffered. Many people still suffer. But later, when JC is asleep, WWX wonders aloud if it was really too long a time to still dig up some old souls to torture some more, and LWJ notably doesn’t stop the line of thought, even though they both know it is, and afterwards they’re especially nice to JC while pretending as hard as they can that they’re not doing any such thing.
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Yanli/Qin Su/ NMJ
Nie Mingjue fully intended to live his life and die young without every getting married, so you’ll have to excuse his bemusement at the fact that he’s now married to not one, but two wives - pretty, sweet wives of excellent breeding and a talent for cooking or hostessing or whatever it is that women do in their spare time. He’s not 100% sure he was ever consulted on any of this.
(They tell him not to complain, and he’s not, he’s just - confused.)
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lwj/lxc
They’re a few years apart, which sets them into the roles of older brother and younger brother, but people still call them twins because sometimes it feels like they’re one soul between two bodies - what is given to one is given to the other, what one likes the other tries, and while their temperament differs it is only the have many facets - LWJ is soft and smiling in private, cold in public, while LXC, who smiled outside, tended to lapse into seriousness in private.
One soul, two bodies - even the Lan sect doesn’t restrict its disciples from touching themselves, as long as they don’t go overboard with it, and it is on that basis that the twin jades have shared a bed from the moment they figured out how much fun it could be. Neither is ashamed, or worried, or guilty; after all, it’s the most natural thing in the world to them.
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Jiang Cheng/Lan Jingyi
Jiang Cheng might be blacklisted by the matchmakers, but he can do better than this. Surely. The kid is Jin Ling’s age. He will absolutely not allow himself to be trampled all over by some brat. It’s beneath his dignity!
(Spoiler: he is 100% wrapped around Lan Jingyi’s little finger.)
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lqr/jyl
Lan Qiren goes into the marriage reluctantly, and with every intention of remaining a gentleman so that Jiang Yanli can divorce him free and clear when the crisis causing them to have to marry passes.
Jiang Yanli has - other plans.
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jgs/jgy
Jin Guangshan is not very discriminating when he’s drunk, and he’s often drunk. He prefers girls, as a general rule, but, well, all cats are grey in the dark.
Jin Guangyao wonders why his mother ever let him be born.
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song lan and jiang cheng
Listen, celestial mountains are all well and good, yeah? It’s very Wei Wuxian, all heaven-blessed talent, but Song Lan - Song Lan is a nobody. An orphan picked up by a minor temple, and look at him now; everyone in the cultivation world knows his name, and all because of his own hard work.
Jiang Cheng is a fan.
(Song Lan doesn’t know what to do with this.)
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WRH/NHS
Nie Mingjue doesn’t know what the relationship between Wen Ruohan and his father was, that led Wen Ruohan to look so closely at him when he was young, to comment on how much he resembled his father in certain ways, that led him to - well, suffice to say, now that Nie Mingjue is sect leader (now that Wen Ruohan has killed his father), he’s not going to let Wen Ruohan look at Nie Huaisang the same way, not even if it kills him.
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wei wuxian/jiang fengmian
Jiang Fengmian thinks of himself as a good man, so he would never let on that he sometimes sees his old lovers in Wei Wuxian’s face - he will never let Wei Wuxian know, he promises himself, not now, not ever, no matter what.
He’ll just be kind to him, smile at him, lift him into his arms or take him into his embrace - that’s reasonable enough, right?
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MXY/WWX
The Yiling Patriarch isn’t anything like Mo Xuanyu expected, but in his defense, even in his wildest dreams it never occurred to him to imagine being rescued from his awful life at Koi Tower and swept away to the Yiling Burial Mounds, because even being poor and hungry was better than being rich and abused.
He has stars in his eyes whenever he looks at his savior, and while WWX may pretend not to notice, MXY has plans to change that.
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jfm/yzy/wcz/cssr
Jiang Fengmian was sure that his wife would kick him out over bringing his old lovers back to the Lotus Pier along with their son after the night hunt that nearly killed them.
He wasn’t expecting her to invite them into their bed, instead, but you know what? he’s just not going to question his amazingly good luck for fear that he’ll suddenly wake up and the world will be different
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madam yu/wei wuxian
there’s a universe, somewhere, where Cangse Sanren came down the mountain and met her man, and then went straight back up the mountain once again; in that universe, it’s Wei Wuxian who comes down with a horsetail whisk in his hand and a smile, his little martial uncle Xiao Xingchen, who’s young enough to be his shidi, right at his side. Jiang Fengmian welcomes the man who might have been his nephew, if things had gone differently (might have been his, if things had gone differently), but Wei Wuxian’s eyes are already focused instead on the fiercely beautiful lady behind him. He heard about her from his mother, who pitied her for her indifferent husband and felt guilty for the chaos she had unwittingly caused; it seems only fair, as his mother’s good son, to pay a little of that debt back - fair, and rather a lot of fun, too.
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How do the 3zun dynamics work in YL Patriarch MY one, because MY is coming into this as a sect leader and not a disgraced basted child. What are the politics in general?
The Yiling Patriarch hid himself as a common soldier and became a spy, murdering Wen Ruohan by his own hand; Nie Mingjue had reason to be grateful to him, and even Lan Xichen liked him - such a pleasant, smiling man, nothing at all like his fearsome legend. It’s easy to swear sworn brotherhood with such a man.
After all, the newly formed sect in Yiling is already a powerhouse - and it’s far better to be allies than enemies.
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xy/xxc
XXC never laughed more in his life than he did with XY - he just legitimately found him absolutely hysterical. It made XY feel like he made XXC just as happy as XXC made him…as long as nothing ever changed.
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Wen Ruohan/Jiang Cheng
It’s Wen Chao that initially gets Wen Ruohan’s interest up and running - even though Wen Chao is mostly angry at Wei Wuxian, he still obediently describes everything he did in the Lotus Pier. Wen Ruohan is a connoisseur of torture, and he salivates at the description of how his son brought Jiang Cheng to kneel before the seat of power that should be his, in the hall where his parents died, how the discipline whip was brought down upon him, how his golden core was destroyed - it was enough to utterly break any man.
How, then, to explain the fact that Jiang Cheng still stood tall against him, sword at his side and a newly raised army at his back? If even that wasn’t enough to break him, what were his limits - how much could he take before it was too much?
Wen Ruohan wanted to find out.
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xue yang/song lan
Xue Yang hates serious-minded, humorless Song Lan. He doesn’t laugh, he barely smiles, he takes everything so seriously - no wonder Xue Yang spends all his time trying to think of ways to drive him up the wall, now that he’d joined them in their little house in Yi City after nearly ruining everything.
Flirting seems to be working really well at getting under Song Lan’s skin. And that’s just little winks and a bit of innuendo - he can’t wait to see Song Lan’s reaction when he gets down on his knees and sucks him off.
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Wen Ruohan/Yu Ziyuan
The only fault Wen Ruohan will admit to having is that he always wants what other people have - and the beautiful but supposedly abandoned Madame Yu caught his eye long ago. When the Lotus Pier falls, he thinks he’ll have both her and her husband brought to the Nightless City: see how Jiang Fengmian likes being the one who’s jealous of the man with the lovely Yi Ziyuan.
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Sizhui/A-Qing
He’s a bit like Xiao Xingcheng, she thinks. She would have liked him, if they’d met when she’d still lived.
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Jiang Chen x Xingchen
XXC initially came to ask JC about his martial nephew, curiosity seizing ahold of him from all the strange rumors, and somehow he finds himself coming back again and again. Yes, he and Song Land have promised to travel the world together - but it’s almost like having a home again.
(JC likes the company, that’s all. Nothing more. Really!)
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Wen Chao / Wei Wuxian
The word, Wang Lingjiao thinks, is fixated. Her man is fixated on Wei Wuxian, unable to stop talking about him and thinking about him, and he doesn’t even realize it, not even when she brought him up when they were in bed together and he was suddenly more enthusiastic than he’d been in weeks.
Definitely time to think about an exit route.
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Wen Chao/Jiang Cheng
In some ways, Wen Chao and Jiang Cheng are the same: younger sons, and not really favored by their fathers. They got compared a lot as children.
Maybe that’s why Wen Chao spends so long glorying in the sight of Jiang Cheng covered in blood and his own disgrace.
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madam jin/meng shi
Madame Jin still doesn’t know why her husband lost his mind enough to actually bring home one of his other women as a concubine - and a prostitute, no less! (If she didn’t know better, she’d think that the woman’s bastard was somehow blackmailing him…but that was surely impossible, given his young age)
She will absolutely not stand for this, and she’s going to go straight to the bitch’s room to tell her that.
She’s still not sure how they ended up in bed together.
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NHS/JGY
One of the first things Meng Yao learned to do for NMJ once they became friends rather than merely superior and subordinate was the braids in his hair, the ones that signified not merely a Nie, but the Nie sect leader.
He took great pride in doing them for Nie Huaisang.
Wasn’t he such a good brother?
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qin su/wwx/lwj
It happens once, in a dream - literally. Wei Wuxian wanted to bring her out of the cursed knife and somehow their spirits got stuck inside of it and…no, he has no idea how or why sex turned out to be the answer, but it was interesting.
She was basically mortified at the start, but got increasingly into it as time went on - after all, she is already dead. Might as well, you know?
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LXC/Wen Xu
When they were younger, Wen Xu liked to be near to LXC, and LXC never seemed comfortable with, or to appreciate it much.
He was looking forward to seeing him when the Cloud Recesses burned. That’s why he was so furious when he wasn’t there, and didn’t come out - not even when he broke his precious little brother’s leg.
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Xue Yang/Wen Ning
Xue Yang just couldn’t figure out how get control, but he eventually figured out how to talk to it. That’s when he figured out that it wasn’t, in fact, an it. It was a man: a sad, lonely man.
Fascinating.
He can work with this.
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Wei Wuxian/The Lan sect rabbits
It’s a matter of irresistible attraction. Wei Wuxian so much as walks into the field - BAM. sudden rabbit mob, all loving up on him.
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wen xu/wen zhuliu
Sometimes, when Wen Xu is bored, he’ll order one of the Wen sect retainers into his bed. He rarely does repeats, but he makes an exception for the retainer assigned to his younger brother just because the man so evidently hates it.
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Jiang Cheng/Lan Xichen/Nie Mingjue
Jiang Cheng never really thought about what the ideal man would be like. Lucky for him, he doesn’t have to pick - he has both. How did this happen?!
(Lan Xichen and Nie Mingjue have little brother complexes that are being displaced on the only actually available target - and it’s going even better than they thought it would. They’re keeping this one.)
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wen ruohan/wen xu
Wen Chao is jealous of how much his father loves his older brother, how special he is in his heart, but any time he says that, his brother frowns and tells him to be quiet. It’s not always easy to be the heir - to be the one Wen Ruohan sees as his legacy.
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Lan Sizhui/Ouyang Zizhen
OYZZ is so naturally romantic that it took literally months of romantic gestures for Lan Sizhui to realize he was actually serious about asking him out.
-
sect leader yao/sect leader Ouyang
Old men like to gossip together. Sometimes the gossip can get a little lurid - and, well, they’re all men here, aren’t they? No shame in it, no shame at all.
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NHS/Wen Chao
It started in the indoctrination camp, when NHS realized that being pathetic in Wen Chao’s general direction was (somehow?) a successful route to being let out of the worst of the chores. It’s no burden at all to flutter his eyes and smile a bit and look weak and sad.
It’s not until Wang Lingjiao tells him to stay away from her man that he realizes that Wen Chao’s friendliness - isn’t.
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LWJ/LSZ
Lan Wangji would never touch a hair on Lan Sizhui’s head. But sometimes, when they’re all alone and it’s just the two of them, Lan Sizhui will bring back liquor, which he can drink and Lan Wangji can’t, and let Lan Wangji fall asleep on his shoulder, dreaming of his long-lost Wei Wuxian. They never go any further than a few kisses (Lan Sizhui would feel bad for taking advantage in that way), but he likes the closeness of it.
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WZL/WX/WC/WRH
Wen Ruohan hates being bound by anything, even social norms. Someone is foolish enough to make a comment about how even he wouldn’t defy the heavens or the laws of men, and he’s determined to do it. So what if his sons have to suffer a bit? It’s not as if they’re anything but an extension of himself.
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Song Lan, Lan Xichen, & Xiao Xingchen
Out of all the sect leaders that try to recruit them, Lan Xichen is the nicest: he’s not really expecting a yes, definitely never pressures them, and seems more inclined to talk about philosophy with them over tea than anything else.
“You remember when we said we’d find someone to experiment with?” Xiao Xingchen asks Song Lan in an undertone while Lan Xichen is off to get them more tea. “Do you think -”
“Yes.”
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3zun&wwx
Wei Wuxian is young and full of energy, but all three of the Venerated Triad is a bit much, even for him. Aren’t they supposed to be older than he is? How do they just keep going on and on?
(no one he complains to has any sympathy)
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song lan/jin zixuan
Untamed verse
Song Lan is still looking for Xiao Xingchen with eyes that aren’t quite his own. Jin Zixuan has instructions from his father to do his best to get Song Lan on board with him, and resources to spare. It’s a perfectly reasonable business arrangement.
Why they end up in bed - well, they’re both lonely and sad, and sometimes that’s all it takes.
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NMJ/JC/WWX
Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian like to fight over who gets to go first. Nie Mingjue is not consulted in these fights, which is good because he doesn’t care - these two brats are already a handful and a half, he’s not going to get in the middle of their weird competition issues even if you paid him.
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jgs/wwx
It was only a passing glance, a hand that lingered a little too long on his shoulder, but Wei Wuxian had already decided he wouldn’t be returning to Koi Tower in this lifetime.
(He was right, too.)
-
Meng Shi/Sisi
They’re friends and they’re lovers, even outside the times when they take jobs together. They trust each other, sharing secrets and gossip equally, and during the cold winters when they have no clients they’ll let Meng Yao climb into bed with them to keep warm. It’s not a good life, but it’s what they have.
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BaoShan SanRen/Nie Mingjue
Nie Mingjue doesn’t know who the woman on the mountain is, only that she asked him if he’d like to come with her; he said no, sorry, he has Duties that he can’t leave behind but that she was very pretty and he’d like to marry her one day if she’d be willing to come to him. She thought he was funny.
It’s not until years later, when he meets Xiao Xingchen, that he finds out exactly who his childhood self had propositioned.
(apparently he’s something of a legend on the celestial mountain)
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wen xu/jzx
The Jin sect think they’re above it all. Time for them to learn that money isn’t power - power is power, and only the sun in the sky is above them all.
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chenqing x suibian
It’s not that they love each other - it’s that they love the same master, and want what’s best for him. Maybe one day, in another life, he’ll be able to use them both.
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NMJ/WX/NHS. Maybe in the same universe as WRH/WX
Wen Xu grew up learning things at his father’s knee. It’s no surprise that when he has a chance to lord it over those people in Qinghe, he does it just the way his father taught him.
(Nie Mingjue hisses in his ear that he’ll have his head for this, and Wen Xu is almost looking forward to it.)
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NMJ/WWX/LXC
Wei Wuxian does not - does not - have an older brother kink.
…he maybe has an older brother kink.
(there’s no other way to explain the dreams he has sometimes)
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3zun/JC
After Jin Guangshan is deposed and Jin Guangyao takes his place, Jiang Cheng knows that the next Discussion Conference is going to be a hard one - after all, the three sect leaders he’ll be cloistered in a small room with for hours and hours on end are all sworn brothers with each other, leaving only him on the outside.
Turns out that he ends up being on the inside, instead.
(he was right about it being hard, though)
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NMJ/NHS/WWX
Wei Wuxian was looking for something (someone) to jerk off about that wasn’t Lan Wangji again, and he finally settled on Nie Huaisang. Except that didn’t quite fit, so he went with Nie Mingjue about halfway through, and suddenly it was both of them and -
wow, yeah, that one’s being added to the permanent fantasy collection