Use Me
Rachel “Ray” Gardner is someone Bakugou never really imagined himself talking to. She’s known around campus as the nerdy brainiac who made it to college ahead of her time and never smiles for anything, not even at her boyfriend. Rumor also has it that she spent a few years locked in a psych ward and she’s actually way older than what she claims, but because she’s so small and youthful looking she passes for one of them, kind of like a ‘The Orphan’ situation but instead of orphan she would be ‘The Co-Ed’ or whatever.
Personally he doesn’t really give a shit about how old she really is, where she spent a few years of her life, how smart she supposedly is, none of that. He’s just bothering her now because he needs to confirm with her that she was out and about eating burgers and shit with Himiko. There’s a nagging feeling in the back of his head that tells him her story was bullshit, but he can’t prove it and despite how fucking early she woke him and how annoyed he was, he was already awake and no one has ever been so desperate to fuck him. Being desired like that is a turn on that’s fairly hard to ignore. But ignore it he will if his theory pans out!
So, back to the chick at hand. She’s quiet and she’s staring at him with these big blue eyes that look like a lake bearing the moon’s reflection. She’s probably the most uninterested and bored looking person he has ever met, as if the whole idea of living life is just really wack to her. He thought that maybe when she opened her room door and saw him she would be super bitchy and curse him out for causing problems with her and her friend, but she didn’t. She merely said, “oh, it’s you...come in I guess” and let him in.
He wasn’t expecting to see some strange man walking around the space of their dorm, but apparently that’s just ‘Zack’ , her homeless friend who’s temporarily staying with her while Himiko is out of the room. He doesn’t even waste his time commenting on that blatantly dangerous code violation.
“So you and Toga haven’t made up then?” He asks her.
The blonde shrugs, “Himi is like a child, she cries, she laughs, she’s angry, all within the span of five minutes. If I wasted all my time being angry with her all day every day for one of her various emotional episodes I would have grey hair.” True. “Why are you asking, did she say something about me?”
He’s certainly not going to tell her that Himiko claimed they hung out because she may cover for her and he’s not gonna catch her like that. So instead he just says… “I’m tired of hearing her bitch about her friends. If you two meet up and talk or whatever then she can move back in and be happy again...and I can have my room back.”
There’s something about the way that Rachel looks at him. It’s not a look that he’s seen before, unlike Himiko who always looks like she wants to eat him alive or maybe shitty hair who looks at him like he’s one of the best people he’s ever known. No, Rachel’s look is ...unnerving. It’s so blank, such a dead stare that he feels like he’s staring at a rigor mortis staged corpse someone left up for a Halloween decoration. If it weren’t for her talking and occasionally moving then he would be effectively creeped out. How is that purple haired extra dating this chick? She’s probably like a plank in bed.
“News flash, she’s always going to bitch about us because that’s just her. We’re very realistic with her and I don’t tolerate sugary sweet lies so I pretty much piss her off all the time. And as for her moving back in...I never told her to leave, actually have asked her to stop being weird and come back already, but for some reason she likes living with you.”
“For some reason?” He scoffs, frowning at her. The fuck is that supposed to mean? You don’t even know me.
“Actually, freshman year we had a class together, sat next to each other in the back, cross reviewed assignments for each other, did several group projects together, and I had the very unfortunate pleasure of speaking to you on multiple occasions. How do you think Himiko even knew you existed? We were in the cafe, I saw you at breakfast one day and said ‘oh look, it’s the shitty asshole I sit next to in Lit.’ Terrible idea really, she swore up and down she was in love the next minute and still hasn’t let it go.”
He looks and feels puzzled. Lit? Freshman year? Her? He sat next to and worked with her ? Jeez he knows he’s bad at remembering people’s faces, but if he works with someone as often as she claims to have worked with him he feels like he would have at least remembered one instance.
“So...it’s your fault she’s so crazy about me?”
“No.” She denies, huffing. “It’s your fault. You’re the same as you were back then, egotistical. A narcissistic know-it-all even though you don’t know-it-all. What you do know is that this sweet naive girl who gets super ahead of herself has serious feelings for you and instead of finding a way to let her down gently you decided to play with her emotions. Have you slept with her yet? What are you using her for exactly?”
He barks out laughter at her. This little creepy bitch. “You call me an egotistical narcissist?” It’s not wrong. “Look at you, sitting all high and fucking mighty in your seat, trying to make me the bad guy when I haven’t done anything she hasn’t practically begged me to do.”
“So you’re a martyr for putting up with her now?” Her eyes roll and she waves an offensively dismissive hand at him.
“Don’t dismiss me bitch. She’s your friend, you know how much of a lunatic she is. I tried telling her several times that I didn’t want shit to do with her and it got me nowhere.”
“I mean, I recall a conversation I had with her where she was quite willing to be over you. She was upset and ‘heartbroken’ but she would’ve moved on. You’re not as great as she thinks you are, as great as you think you are.”
For a hot minute he considers just whacking her with his crutch and then kicking her while she’s down because dammit he really hates the way she’s talking to him. So rude and dismissive, but so calm and composed as if this conversation with him is the equivalent to a conversation about the weather; boring and meaningless. Never in his life has anyone been so fucking haughty with him and he doesn’t really know what to do with it. His anger clearly doesn’t bother her, he’ll be damned if he plays nice with her, how do you stir the dead?
“Do you even care about your friend? Cause she cares about your twisted ass a lot. Aren’t you supposed to be threatening to stay away from her if you’re so convinced I’m bad for her?”
“Do I look like her mommy?” She questions, raising a simple brow. “As her friend, I gave her warnings, I told her the truth, and I never lied to her about how I felt towards you and towards her desires for you. But , it’s not my responsibility to force her eyes open. She’s a grown woman and she’s intelligent enough to learn on her own. You’re going to burn her and when you do, like a good friend I will be there, but until then I’m not about to let completely avoidable drama rain on my parade.”
Well there it is. Rachel is an asshole and a fucking horrible person in his book. The irony? Would he react the same way if one of his friends was being an idiot, sure would. But his saving grace is that his friends aren’t clearly mentally unstable so he wouldn’t feel so compelled to do something the way he feels Rachel should be compelled to. If he says it like that then it sounds almost like he actually cares about Toga’s well-being..and he doesn’t. He’s just baffled but her response to the whole situation.
He stands her, gripping his crutches in his hands, “fuck you. You can think what you want about me, I don’t give a shit. I won’t even remember who you are after I leave here.” He will though, because she’s definitely managed to make a lasting impression on him this time. “Hope you’re ready to never see your friend again, she’s mine now, and she doesn’t fucking need you.”
“Okay?” She mutters. “Would you like me to get the door for you cripple?”
He pauses and inhales sharply through his nose and bites down hard on his lip. Stupid little smartass. “No.” He hisses, getting the door for himself thank you very much. “I’d like you to suck my dick and choke you fucking freak.”
He hears her snort behind him, cockily and it takes everything in him not to turn around and charge her. “Probably not much to choke on, but you have a fantastic day too.” Right behind him there’s the TV resting on the stand so innocently and completely out of the way of their argument. He doesn’t even hesitate to knock it over with his crutch and he grins when it crashes loudly to the floor, it’s what she deserves and then he slams the door on his way out.
When he gets back to his room, Toga’s in there, gathering her books for her next class, but he has other ideas in mind for her. He’s not about to let that little scrumpet be right, Toga isn’t going to leave him. He won’t let her, if anything, it will be him leaving her because that’s how this is supposed to work. He is a fucking catch, the greatest damn catch anyone could ever catch and Camie, shit... Rachel , is wrong. This..this insane, bat shit woman is the only one who understands that right now so he’ll make do with that. He’ll use her to demonstrate how amazing he is, he’ll use her to make everyone else feel stupid, envious. This is his pet, his project, his example.
The pet is caught off guard when he comes in practically steaming from the ears, foaming at the mouth and orders her to bend over, but like a good pet she doesn’t ask questions or make any objections, just does exactly as her owner tells her.
Crutches abandoned on the floor and he kneels behind her, pushing her dress up and bunching the fabric of her red panties in his hand, pulling them teasingly against her cunt. She giggles and tries to ask him what’s gotten him so hot, but he merely tells her to be quiet. Good pets only speak when spoken to and the only things she’s allowed to do are give him answers to his questions and praises for him being the best thing she’s ever had.
He licks a stripe over the thin fabric of her panties and listens to the way she purrs softly. He palms the flesh of her round ass, massaging her cheeks in his hands as he mouths her wet panties, taunting her body with his not so direct contact. ‘You’re going to burn her.’ He will, he will burn his name, his face, his entire being all over her and what will she do? Nothing, but everything he wants her to. She asked for this, she chased him, she hounded him, begged for him, gave herself over willingly, she can’t ever just leave . There’s no need for Rachel to be there to pick her up because by the time he’s through with her, Rachel won’t be on her radar. She will have no one and he will be the only person she can think of, she’ll come back, again and again and beg him like she begged him before to be with her, to love her. The same way he begged Camie and then they’ll both be idiots.
He hooks his fingers in her panties and pulls them down, pushing a finger into her tight hole and then adding a second because he knows she can take a lot more than that, thank you very much. ‘Probably not much to choke on.’ Fuck her, stupid asshole. He would leave her gagging for air and crying, who does she think she is? “Katsuki.” Himiko whines. His cock stirs in his jeans as he ogles the sight of his fingers slipping in and out of her pussy, the noises she makes are like obscene music to his ears, so wet and messy, his good little gushing pet. His thumb works circles into her clit, her hips grind against him, greedy little thing.
“You were right, you’ve got such a pretty little pussy. Who does it belong to?”
She’s quick to tell him it belongs to him, but he wants more than just that. “What’s my name?”
“K-Katsuki. Bakugou..Katsuki.” And no one else. He dips his head down, dragging his tongue along her pucker and she gasps, her back arching more.
“And this ass, who does this ass belong to?”
“You, Katsuki!” And no one else. His fingers curl inside her, pressing against that soft spot at her core, dragging her orgasm to the frontlines while his thumb rubs her faster and his tongue laps at her hole. He’s going to claim every part of her body, every part of her mind, own her entirely. His free arm steadies her writhing body as she pants heavily, her hands clinging to his sheets desperately as her mounting orgasm starts to get the best of her. This is something he can genuinely enjoy about his little pet, she cums like no other bitch, so hard, so earnestly and that’s all because of him.
Her walls tighten around him and the only thing she cries out is his name as she cums all over his fingers, covering his digits in her cream. He works her through it, watching and listening to her come down from her high. He removes his fingers from her and takes them into his mouth, tasting her on him, she tastes so good. Compliments to the chef. Bakugou moves away from her for a moment just to grab something from his drawer, lube.
He squirts a generous glob on her asshole, using his fingers to massage it over her hole, working a finger inside her. “You need me, don’t you?”
“Yes.” She replies, confirming what he already knows. “I love you.” He knows this too.
“So you’d do anything for me, then?” He questions as he works her hole open with another finger and palms himself through his pants. “Whatever I say, you’ll do, like a good little pet.”
“Yes, Katsuki. I just want you to be happy.” He leans over and presses a kiss to her lower back. Good. She whimpers when he removes his fingers, but he shushes her gently, they’re games are far from over. He stands up behind her, rucking his bottoms off and plants himself behind her, propping his left knee on the bed. Her ass wags happily when she hears him spit into his hand, coating his impressive , for Rachel’s fucking information, length. He drags his head along her slick hole and presses into her slowly. They both hiss together at the feel, she’s so tight, he can’t wait to stretch her out.
“Fuck.” He curses under her breath, pushing into her more.
“Mmm, Baku, c-can you be gentle please?” She mewls, “I’m fragile.”
Ha! He’s got scratches and bite marks all over him that tell him she’s anything but. She’s a pain freak and they both know this, but he doesn’t want to actually physically hurt her and he’s a gentleman so of course he’ll give her time to adjust, but that doesn’t mean she won’t be walking around without a limp when he’s done with her.
When he’s buried inside her, he pauses, allowing her a gracious moment to get comfortable with him nestled so deeply in her ass and when he can’t hold off any longer he moves. Inching himself almost all the way out and slamming back into her. He does this until he feels he can move freely, faster, harder. Snapping his hips against her roughly and loving the way her ass bounces against him and the way she cries out her pleasure. He has her right where he needs her, in the throws of ecstasy and he uses this opportunity to remind her that he is all she needs, him and no one else, not Rachel, not Miki, shit not even her parents. He should be the only person she ever thinks about, the only person she feels comfortable ever going to, the person she has to rely on because no one else will ever care for her.
He leans down against her, grinding his hips into her and whispers hotly into her ear. “Do you know what she said?” He pants, huskily, “she doesn’t give a shit about you Himi. Your friends abandoned you. They don’t trust me, but they just threw you to the wolves. They’re not really your friends, baby.”
He thinks he can almost hear her sniffle, but he can’t be sure because her face is buried in the sheets. “You trust me, yeah?” When she doesn’t answer him immediately he pulls on her hair, yanking her head back so he can see and hear her clearly. “Oi, I asked you a question didn’t I?”
“Yes! Yes, I trust you!” She cries out. “Please..can I cum please?”
“I’m the only person you have now. She gave your room to some...homeless fuck. That’s how little you mean to her, you know that?”
She’s definitely crying, but of course she is. He just ripped her whole world apart. How long did she spend thinking that bitch was her real friend only to be told that she never mattered to her. “Please..” she begs quietly. He kisses her wet cheek, licking away some of her salty tears. She’s been a good pet, good pets get rewarded.
He releases her hair, letting her slump back down and moves his hand to her sensitive clit, strumming her to her second orgasm while his own creeps over him. He clenches his jaw, growling above her as his strokes turn rushed and sloppy, she’s a quivering mess, desperate and hopeful for release. He knows that when she cums she’s probably cumming to the idea of having everything she ever wanted, him. But when he cums, he’s cumming to the idea of winning. That walking bimbo Camie tried to play him, tried to make him feel like a loser, but he’s won. This crazy little loon is proof that he’s everything to at least someone. And Rachel? That bitch can wait forever and day, but she’s never getting Himiko back. Never.
Himiko sighs and groans tiredly, it’s starting to get late, she’s tired and so incredibly bored. She’s been sitting with Dabi for almost two hours just watching this house and doing absolutely nothing else. First of all, her butt hurts so sitting here in this lumpy ass old seat is killing her. Secondly, she has a lot on her mind and she would like to talk to him about it since he’s here, but every time she tries he shuts it down. He doesn’t want to hear her ‘whining’ and ‘complaining’ and he doesn’t care about her relationship drama.
It’s such a turn around from how he was last night, helpful and kind, friendly. Maybe he needs to be drinking again for her to get the good Dabi. She has tried to talk to herself about her newest feelings, but she can never have a straight conversation with herself. She gets too distracted, she’s biased, and she can never keep her thoughts straight.
The facts about her personal life. She’s sad. She lost her two closest friends and she’ll never be able to go back to them. They gave her chance after chance and she blew it for a crush. She’s hurt. She feels like they shouldn’t have given her such an ultimatum. They were supposed to be her friends and what has Bakugou ever really done to her to warrant so much dislike from them? He’s shifty. His moods change at the drop of a dime and she never knows which Bakugou she’s going to encounter. Sometimes his words are nasty and make her feel insecure and lower her self esteem. But he’s apologetic, he doesn’t do it on purpose, he just...is bad with social etiquette.
He cares about her. He worries when she’s out late with no word, he’s protective of her in his own way. He could’ve broke the news about Ray to her and just let her cry and feel shitty, but he held her in his strong arms and helped her overcome her pain by blessing her with orgasm after orgasm. That’s good right? It felt helpful for her. So why does she still feel off about it?
It has to be because of what she’s doing now. Initially she was gung-ho for this side hobby as a gangster, but now that she’s got her more rational head on she’s having second thoughts about it. She’s having waking nightmares about what could happen to her if she continues down this path. Shiggy has been to prison which means they make mistakes and they get caught, he does at least. Which means she could get caught and she could go to prison too. She’s already lost her friends, she doesn’t want to lose everything else too.
“So you wanna quit?” Dabi drawls, rolling his eyes. “You are probably the most annoyingly indecisive person I’ve ever met.” She can’t help that, it’s just how she is.
“You said all I have to do is finish paying off my debt. I’m just asking how much longer that will be.”
Dabi licks his lips and points out her window towards the house they’re supposed to be watching. “See that man?” He asks as he slinks down in his seat. She follows his lead, also slinking out of sight but keeping an eye on the man he pointed to. There’s a lot of them actually, but she assumes he’s obviously talking about the one being guarded and escorted into the fancy ass car out front. “His name is Chisaki Kai.” He tells her. This is the man who dropped a dime on Shigaraki and had him locked up. He did it because he views Shigaraki as a gutter trash. His drugs are destroying Chisaki’s market, turning his clientele into degenerates. Their haul is cheaper and elicits a better high than Chisaki’s drugs. Chisaki’s drugs are enhancers, they make people feel almost invincible, keep you up and going for days on end without sleep. He also has what he refers to as ‘suicide pills’ which he sells to people who have vendettas to settle. They destroy people from the inside out causing an incredibly painful death.
Their products are on two completely different spectrums and both of them are trying to own Whitefall, she can see where their problems stem from. “So what? Shiggy wants to kill him?”
“No shit, but I don’t really feel like crossing hairs with the Yakuza, too much work and too much shit on the line.”
“So what are you planning?” She questions with narrowed eyes. “I know you didn’t bring me out here for no reason.”
Dabi smirks at her and pets her head, “smart cookie. I’ve known Shigaraki for years now so I know how impossible it is to change his mind about something. Since I know he’s going to go to war with this guy I plan on padding my escape which is why I brought you along.”
“We go to a school with thousands of snobby rich kids, like you. They need good grades, they’re obsessed with studying, they’ll do anything to be the best. Heroin, weed, and hallucinogens aren’t going to help them do that...but enhancement pills will. We steal Chisaki’s drugs, sell them on campus and make a fuck ton. While we’re getting rich Chisaki will be thinking Shigaraki took his stash and he’ll go after him. That scaly idiot will retaliate and they’ll all end up either killing each other or getting arrested and thrown back in prison...I’m hoping for the former. That way there’s no loose ends.”
Honestly she’s surprised that Dabi is so willing to put his friends' lives at risk like that, without a single care except for what would happen to him if he screws up. She could clearly see that he, Shigaraki, and Spinner weren’t the closest, but Compress too? “They’ll look for you.” She tells him. “Chisaki’s crew.
“They have no idea who I am. I made sure to steer absolutely clear of those fuckers. And they don’t know you either. Which is why you have to find a way to get in there and find out where the drugs are so the next time they leave, I can go in and steal it.”
Oh. Oh she sees what this is. He wants to make sure he stays completely out of sight so he doesn’t get the blowback, but he’s totally fine throwing her into the flames? “You dick! I’m not getting killed over you!” She exclaims, punching him in his arm. “Fuck you Dab! I’m not a pawn, you bastard!!”
“Chill out, chill out!” He hisses swatting at her. “Just listen, if you do what I say and nothing less or more you’ll be fine. If you’re so worried about it then do that little makeup shit you do, the normal kind though.”
“That ‘little makeup shit?’” She scowls. “You want me to pack on makeup just to go lie to someone?”
“I mean you already do it for free, do it for a paycheck.” He snorts, shrugging at her. “Throw in some contacts, wear a wig, make yourself look different. You’ll be fine.”
That’s so easy for him to say, he’s not the one throwing himself in the wolves den. She has to think about this for a hot minute. What are the pros? She successfully steals the drugs, sells them with Dabi and gets money. The cons are that they get caught and she gets shot. “Yeah I don’t think so. I’m too pretty to die.”
“He won’t hurt you, you’re a lady…closest thing to one. He has a daughter, treats her like a princess, he’s preferential to females. Look, if I thought you were in danger I wouldn’t have involved you. You’re spastic and crazy, but I know you can handle yourself. Just trust me, yeah?” She stares at him with wary eyes. Lesson learned, never play gangsters again. If she says no and stays with the League there’s no telling how long she’ll have to play puppet, but this shouldn’t take too long. If he’s a clean freak then she could try to go in as a maid, that would gain her full access to the house.
He probably has cameras all through the house though so she would have to figure a way around those. And there’d be a lot of eyes on her. Honestly it’s just not looking like a good idea. “I can’t. I’m a chicken.” She admits.
Dabi sucks his teeth, “I thought you would say that, which is why I have a backup plan to ensure I get my way.” He leans over her, opening the glove compartment and pulling out a folder, dropping it on her lap. “Look at those, think about what I’m gonna do with them, and then tell me what your answer is.” He instructs.
Inside the folder is a bunch of pictures of Toga in some rather compromising positions. She recognizes these as the photos she so generously sent him back when they were fooling around. Photos that he swore he deleted, but clearly didn’t. Oh she’s so embarrassed right now. “Dabi!!” She whines, throwing an absolute tantrum in her seat. “This is revenge porn! It’s illegal!”
“So call the police...then you can explain to your precious father how I got those pictures in the first place. Oh and Bakugou? Whew, can’t wait to see how he reacts to seeing his girlfriend's pussy spread all over campus. His ego is gonna be torched, he’ll be so pissed.”
“Oh shut up I get it! You’re such an ass! Fine! I’ll sacrifice myself for your selfish cause! But I want fifty percent of the cut!”
“Twenty.”
“Fifty! I’m doing all the work!”
“Fifteen because you’re complaining.” She fixes her mouth to object, but holds back. If he wants to play dirty then she can play dirty too. She’ll get her fair share one way or the other, but fuck him for doing this to her. On today of all days when she’s already hurting and confused he decides to drop this on top of her. It’s becoming abruptly clear to her that all her friends are just using her. Using her for laughs and games. She means nothing to them, nothing but a joke.
It’s been three days since Dabi unveiled his big plan to her and she’s been stewing ever since. Katsuki is always doing something, either with his friends or studying for class, at soccer practice -not like he can actually do anything there. So why can’t he use that time to spend time with her? She feels so lonely, so isolated and she just wants to be around him because being around him is what makes her feel happy. That’s when she feels the safest.
He has been doing so much for her lately while everyone else has just been letting her down. She decides that he deserves something special so she pulls herself up and sets off to do what she does best. Shop. She wants to get him something that lets him know how much she really does love and appreciate him for everything he’s done. She also wants to get Rachel and Miki something because she has a hard time letting go. She just doesn’t want to believe that they’re really gone and she would be regretful if she didn’t at least try.
She winds up filling her basket with more craft supplies than is probably necessary but these are some very big projects she’s working on so she needs every last bit of it. She can’t risk doing it in the dorm and having one of them catch her so instead she goes to Gemini and takes a booth to herself. They’re all going to get vouchers with coupons inside of them, redeemable at any time. Ray and Miki’s are full of friendly coupons with things she knows they love doing or want to do with her but never got around to. Katsuki’s are full of cuter and sexier coupons. She also made him a love poem full of forever promises expressing her unyielding love for him.
For someone who’s talented enough to do face paint she can’t draw on paper worth a shit so the little pictures of them on their wedding day and surrounded by their babies looks like chicken scratch, but it’s the thought that counts...she needs more thought. Considering that she has now agreed to get herself involved with the Yakuza, she definitely needs to put more thought into this. She should bake him something sweet, cupcakes.
She’s never been all that good at baking or cooking, but she can do a little something something if she really tries. The ingredients she gets for the cupcakes are all over the place but she’ll find a way to make it work. He didn’t tell her what time he would be back, never does, but she’s been keeping track of his rotating schedule so she can know when to expect him and if he’s on time today she has roughly an hour to make her masterpiece.
Luckily she didn’t burn anything and the icing is a little wonky but she thinks she can consider this another job well done for her. “Good job Himi.” She mumbles patting herself on the back. She made brownie cupcakes with sprinkles inside and orange icing with his name spelled out in black lettering on each cupcake. Will they even eat 14 cupcakes? He can probably share them with some of his teammates if they don’t eat all of them.
She lays the cupcakes out on the coffee table along with his poems and vouchers and then changes into a cute white crochet pattern dress with strappy white sandals that come up to her calves. She can always hear them coming back before she sees them, they’re so loud and ugh there’s so many of them. One, two, three, four, five, six of them come walking in the door. The usual five suspects and Kirishima’s girlfriend and they all seem to think these cupcakes are for them even though there’s someone’s name clearly already spelled out on them.
“You can’t have them before Katsuki does, Kaminari!” She exclaims smacking his dirty hand away. “If he wants to share he can share tomorrow, but I would greatly appreciate it if you all would... leave .”
“What is this?” Bakugou asks, looking over everything on the table.
“Man I miss being able to come to my dorm and just stay here.” Kirishima laughs.
“I’ll explain it all just as soon as we’re alone.” She smiles at the blonde.
Bakugou raises an eyebrow at her, frowning lightly. She quietly pleads to him with her eyes, begging him to get rid of everyone so they can have a moment alone for their little celebration. She wants them to have a nice and quiet night together without all the others in here.
He sighs, turning to the others and shoos them all away, all except Kirishima and Mina. Kirishima lives here and he’s not just gonna kick him out and since Mina is his girlfriend if Kiri wants her here then she gets to stay too. Fine, they’ll be in his room and out of the way.
“Can I shower first?” He asks her.
“We can shower together later.” She smiles. She motions towards the couch and he begrudgingly sits down, leaning his crutches against the couch next to him. Toga picks up a cupcake, offering it to him with a wide smile before sitting down next to him.
He makes a face at the taste of the icing which she can understand because she didn’t like it either when she sampled it, but it’s more so just for the aesthetic. At least he approves of the actual cupcake itself. Fudgy chocolate packed into a nice little mini cake, full of sprinkles and love.
“I wrote this for you and made this for you. That was supposed to be a simple card with one poem but then I got excited and it turned into a little book of love poems. And that one is a voucher full of coupons to be used at any time.”
Her heart races as he looks over her gifts, slowly thumbing through her handcrafted pages, his eyes quickly skimming over some pages and lingering more on others. Her cheeks are dusty with blush when his eyes glide over the lines of her poem and they turn an even brighter shade of red when she notices his own cheeks slightly tinged in rouge as well. Oh heavens he likes the poems. She knows she’s good with words, she writes fan fiction for craps sake, has tons of readers, but these love poems are different.
They have to convey a deep kind of meaning and they have to express every bit of affection and love she has for him. For being the only person who’s honest with her and the only one who accepts her as she is. It depicts two years worth of longing and desire, all her hopes and dreams for them and everything she wants to do for him.
“You wrote this shit by yourself?” He grunts, setting the poems back down on the table and leaning back against the couch. She nods, chewing on her lip.
“Did you...did you like the poems?” She whispers.
“I mean... I don’t do all that cheesy shit, but... it was fine. They were fine.” He can’t even look her in her eyes right now and his cheeks are getting darker. He’s such a cutie pie. “Is there an occasion?” He wonders aloud.
“Not really? I mean.. with everything going on I felt like you deserved it. But isn’t just loving you occasion enough?”
“You and that l word.” He mumbles. Katsuki leans over, resting his elbows on his knees and running a hand through wild hair. “You claim that you’re so in love with me...you had two years before now to say something. Why now? Do you realize how difficult it makes it for me to believe that you love me? Out of nowhere you come at me with all these insanely strong emotions and springing affection on me every time I turn around. I’m not a nice guy, you realize that, right?! I’m an asshole Toga, I tried turning you down and pushing you away and you just never backed down. What is wrong with you?”
….what? Himiko groans softly, looking at the table. The cupcakes are still there, the poems and voucher are still there, and her dress is still cute. It’s still the same afternoon that she decided to do all this. He enjoyed her cupcake, he liked her poem, he thought the voucher was nice...so why on earth is he so upset now? He’s starting to sound like Ray.
She tries to suppress the urge to cry. There’s no need for her to cry, she just needs to explain herself clearly to him. Of course the poems were supposed to do that, but everyone always needs to hear things from her more than once apparently.
Himiko exhales through her lips and brushes loose hair behind her ears, lowering herself to the floor between his knees. “If I had talked to you two years ago, would you have even looked twice at me?” She asks him. She already knows the answer before he tells her; no. Exactly. She needed time, first to see if her crush would even stick because yes okay, she is fickle with love. She has a big heart and a lot of emotions, she has light years worth of affection to give to people and Bakugou didn’t seem like the kind of person to trifle with if she was just going to get over him in a week.
“When I found out that we were going to live in the same building this year and that we had classes together I took that as the cosmos telling me that it was time. Time to...grow on you. I just wanted you to notice me. I get it, I’m clingy and I’m obsessive, I do a lot of weird and annoying things, but that’s just how I love..I love hard.”
Himiko slinks her hands into his and rests her head on his thigh. “I’ve been so sad these last few days and I feel like even though I’m finally getting what I wanted most...I’m losing everything else I loved too. My heart hurts Katsuki, I just...I just wanted to do something nice for you so you know how much I appreciate you for keeping me sane right now. Everyone else has just been using me for their own amusement. Laughing at me behind my back, treating me like I’m expendable...but you, I feel like you really love me back.”
She smiles softly, nestling against his thigh. “You’re so honest with me and that’s why I’m so dedicated to you. You could take whatever you need from me and I would give it to you. I would be whatever you need me to be and you could use me all you needed because at least I know you’d never change up on me.”
His hand feels heavy when it comes to rest on her head, lightly scraping his nails against her scalp. His other hand comes to rest on her upper back, rubbing gently and she feels good. “It’s you Bakugou Katsuki. Even if you mess up, it’ll always be you. And I hope that for you it’s me, regardless of what I do, how bad I may mess up, I hope it’ll always be me for you.” She smiles harder when he leans over and kisses the top of her head. His finger comes down to lift her chin up so he can lock eyes with her.
This is probably the warmest look he’s ever given ever and she would’ve never noticed had she never done this. Hours ago she thought she had already seen his warm side, gentle and sweet, but the way he cradles her in his lap and murmurs against her neck tells her that she had only seen lukewarm before. “As long as it’s me for you, it’s you for me.”