Across the Ocean

There is one week of high school left—one week of Tests and assignments that mean nothing, not anymore, at least. Thomas shakes his head as he closes his locker door. His bag is pulled tight over his shoulder. He's got one week left—one week of walking from his last-period class to the club room that Matthew secured for them in their first year of high school. It helped that Matthews's mom was a very powerful woman, and he often got what he wanted. The Fairchild children often got special privileges, which Thomas knew he benefitted from. 

But well, Matthew wasn't exactly the perfect child, and he lived in the shadow of his elder brother, who had gone off to school two years or so; Charles was studying at some fancy US school, and Thomas couldn't be bothered to remember which one. He knows Charles will return for the summer; Matthew had been lamenting about it since he learned of his brother's fancy internship working for the London parliament. 

Charles hadnt lived in London for almost two years now, and he still seemed to hold power over Matthew's life, overshadowing him, but Matthew hadnt been coping well. He was having to do a 'victory lap' of high school due to poor grades, and he had spent too much time partying and drinking rather than doing his school work. The Fairchild had covered it up, saying that Matthew had just wanted to learn the most he could before going to college. 

They all knew otherwise, but no one said it; how Matthew had been letting his brother control his anger, that he let his anger for the 'perfect flawless' Charles keep him from being his person. 

"Hey, Thomas! Could you sign my yearbook?" Oliver Hayward offered a pen, which snapped Thomas out of his trance. Looking up, he nodded and took the pen and the book. 

"course, did you get any acceptances?" Thomas asked as he flipped open the page, looking for a clear spot. Oliver had asked literally everyone in his graduating class to sign it. They hadnt gotten close, but Thomas knew that his older sister was fond of him; Barbra was a year older than him. They got close in her final year, and hes heard her mention him once or twice, but they dont often speak about their love lives. 

"I did. I got into my top school." Oliver nodded as Thomas started to write in the yearbook.

"Congratulations, where are you going?" Thomas asked, 

"Oxford, a bit typical for this school, I know." Oliver shrugged; that's where Barbra was going. She was there for literary studies and wanted to be a teacher; maybe they still have a fighting chance. 

"Hey, still a good school," Thomas nods, then closes the book and returns it to him.

"what about you?" Oliver asks as he moves to put his yearbook in his bag, 

"still deciding. I've got a couple of offers. I'm just making a choice." Thomas lied, but he hadnt even told his friends yet, so he wasn't about to spill it like this. 

"I get that," Oliver nodded, "I have to catch the bus, but good luck, mate."

"thanks, see you around." Thomas nodded as he started back down the hall. He wandered very close to the club room when he let out a small sigh. He would miss these walls; he knew that, but he had to admit, he was growing tired of them. The cold and sterile halls of the 'best Private School in Britain' didn't have as much of the appeal it had years back, and even sadder, he was growing tired of his closet friends. 

Christopher was Thomas's cousin, and he was very sweet, but he grew on Thomas's nerves when he, for the millionth time, refused to think through one of his projects and nearly blew up the school; how Thomas would have to clean it up, how Kit would just do whatever he thought would give him the best results and fuck any conquests. No, Thomas had to deal with those. Prone to blowing up chemicals to see what would happen, 

but He wasn't even the worst of it. No, that went to James and Matthew's consent and endless fighting. It had only worsened as of late, making him want to leave as soon as possible. They had been fighting over everything lately, screaming at each other till they were red in the face, and their voices gave out. Sometimes, Thomas could intervene and shut it down, but he grew tired of putting out fires. 

Rounding the corner, Thomas saw the door to the club slightly open, and as he approached, he heard the voices of his friends, 

"And how is that my fault?" Thomas heard as he walked into the club room, wishing he was back in calc. Calc made sense. Whatever was going on between Matthew and James didn't. 

"You failed to stop it. That's how" James and Matthew were fighting so often these days, over what Thomas wasn't quite sure.

"Afternoon," Thomas mumbled, dropping his bag on the chair, before walking over to Christopher, who looked like he was building a bomb. "What's this one about?"

"James and Matthew?" Kit looked over, getting a nod from Thomas, "No idea they were like this when I walked in," Kit shrugged off, moving the goggles from his eyes, whipping off the sweat that had collected in them. 

"Fun, what are you doing?" Thomas turned the conversation around to his cousin,

"I messed up an experiment in chem, so I'm retrying it to figure out what I did wrong. I swear I was keeping a close eye on it," Christopher huffed, all his attention focused on the table of (mostly stolen) lab supplies,

"Well, good luck," Thomas turned, pulling out his laptop; as he pulled out the beaten-up old machine, he couldn't help but grin at the New York City sticker he had gotten sent to him.

"Your American friend would likely still be in class," Kit mumbled, 

"It would be around ten, Kit, and I wasn't going to message him," Thomas deflected, 

Alastair_C was a bit of fresh air in his stale life. A boy who lived an ocean away offered something a school whole of students right next to him couldn't; his stories were more interesting than anything the rich posh kids he took classes with could come up with. 

"Sure," Christopher remarked. Thomas opened his laptop to see a new message in his Discord,

'Remind me never to retake an 8:30 lecturer.' Alastair's message was dated only two minutes back, and it was likely that he had gotten out of class and messaged him. Maybe he had just slid his phone out of his jeans pockets and shot a message as anyone would. 

'Would it make a difference?' Thomas typed quickly, opening up his English homework. He was still technically not texting Alastair if he had his English homework open, right?

'Maybe? But that teacher is awful anyway,' Alastair responds. Alastair was only a year older than Thomas and went to university in the States, but they had talked since Thomas entered ninth grade. He got his laptop. They had met over a Reddit forum, talking about US politics and why Thomas was on that page. He doesn't remember, but hes glad he was there.

Alastair was quick-witted and intelligent; he was different, something that Thomas grew to crave in the everyday still life he leads.

'So besides your 9 a.m. class, what have you been up to????' Thomas asks, finally opening his English homework, debating, and grabbing his headphones as James and Matthew bicker over something useless.

'You know, studying, caring for my mum, seeing the guy occasionally, and working the graveyard shift at my coffeeshop.' The guy had become the name for the man Alastair was sleeping with, whom he refused to tell Thomas about.

Thomas doesn't even know the man's name, but hes jealous of him. 

'Why are you working the graveyard shift?? You need to sleep!!' Thomas sighed, focusing on something other than the man who gets to be with Alastair.

Inevitably, his stupid crush on a man halfway around the world will fade away. It had to. 

'If I work the graveyard shift, then I don't have to leave my mother and sister alone with my father in the early evening, AND the cruel man doesn't find out that I am keeping us afloat since he refuses to let my mother or sister hold jobs,'

'... fair enough,' Thomas types in defeat when something explodes, and he snaps his laptop shut. Surprisingly, the 'explosion' isn't Christopher at the lab table. Matthew was throwing a glass.

"Matthew," Thomas pushes himself up from his seat. "Get the broom. We talked about you breaking glass," Thomas demands. Like that, the room gets colder. Once Matthew sweeps the glass into the dustpan, Thomas glares at Matthew and James, sitting on the couch. "Kit, take this to the dumpster to throw out." Thomas passes Kit the dustpan, and the boy hurries from the room.

"Look, Tommy.." Matthew tried before getting cut off

"Save it," Thomas gritted his teeth, "What the fuck are you, two morons, fighting about now?"

"Grace-" James started just to be cut off. Thomas hated it when his friends fought about a girl, mainly because it was always a dumb argument.

"Oh great, we're fighting about a girl." Thomas rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, that James is completely obsessed with for no reason," Matthew shot at James, who had to relate.

"There isn't no reason, and I saw you were hitting on my sister-" James slipped out.

"I did not hit on Lucie. You walked in to see us TALKING, like two people who have known each other for a long time." Matthew smacked the back of his hand on the palm of his other hand,

"Shut it," Thomas snapped, pulling them back to attention. "First off, James Matthew wasn't hitting on Lucie. Hes not that stupid."

"Hey-" Matthew let out; Thomas didn't care.

"Two, Matthew, have you considered that James is just a little excited that the girl he liked in grade school is back in school with us," Thomas suggested,

"Why couldn't the girl be Cordelia?" Matthew huffed. Thomas had never met Cordelia. Still, she was a myth from the summer she and Lucie had 'bonded for life' when they had gone to a two-week overnight camp. Then Lucie convinced her parents to let Cordelia stay with them for another two weeks.

"Cordelia wasn't ever in school with us. She was in a summer camp with Lucie," James looked down at his shoes,

"Still, she was nice and gorgeous," Matthew shrugged, both getting quiet.

"If you two start fighting about a girl you haven't seen in the better part of a decade, I swear to god." Thomas broke their silence, trying to stop a fight about Cordelia.

"We weren't, relax," Matthew shook his head,

"Is there something else wrong, or a reason why you two are fighting more often," Thomas asked as Chrisphoer slipped back in the room,

"Maybe we're just stressed, yknow with finals and everything," James suggested as they heard the door fling open,

"Daisy is coming to visit this summer," Lucie yelled, a letter in hand, "I will see her for the first time since we were eight," she flung her arms around Thomas's neck,

"That's great, Luce," Thomas grinned, ruffling her already messy rugby practice hair.

"Mum said she would prep a room, and I want to show her everything. She last visited England when she was here with me. Her brother got some internship for the summer, and their parents agreed to let Daisy come with him," Lucie talked a mile a minute as she moved to jump on Kit's back; her boundless energy had come in full force.

"Why would she need to stay with us then?" James raised an eyebrow.

"Well, she won't spend every night but some nights," Lucie shook her head, "Tom, can you drive me to the airport? I think you would like her brother,"

"Why not us?" Matthew and James demanded because it would be both of them

"Because you'll freak Daisy out; you're too forward; she's rather quiet and reserved, you know," Lucie shook her head.

"And she's friends with you," James remarked.

"James!" Lucie stomped her foot, looking ready to attack her brother before Thomas spoke up

"I'll drive you, Lucie." He shrugged,

"Why couldn't you be my brother? Barbra and Eugenia are so lucky," Luice grinned,

"They are off a Uni, but I would bet they disagree," Thomas laughed. The number of times he had been called an annoying brat by his sisters was astounding. The three of them had gotten closer, but when they were young, they fought like no tomorrow. However, he missed his sisters and was excited for them to come home for the summer. 

"Alright, boys, I need someone to drive me to pick up these things for Mum," Lucie held out a small written list. James and Lucie's mom was the only one in the Herondale/Fairchild/Lightwood family who didn't hold a political office job, likely due to her American origins. She was a librarian and did more charity work than anyone thought was possible. 

However, because her family was not wealthy and didn't hold office seats, she made her kids work and gave them chores and tasks instead of hiring them. 

This meant that Matthew, Thomas, and Christopher also had chores to do with them. Thomas never minded. He enjoyed it. Both to spend time with Luice because he rarely got to do it, and the chores broke up his regular schedule. 

"We can split it in half," Thomas took the list. It was rather long, likely due to the lack of chores over their studying periods. "who wants to go with whom?" 

"you're coming with me, James and Matthew, but I would rather not get stuck with you fighting in a Tesco again," Lucie wrapped her arm around Thomas's arm, grinning up at him. 

Neither saw the glare that James gave to Thomas as they shared a smile. 

"Alright, that is all of the food. Does your mom do a charity food drive every week?" Thomas asked as he closed the trunk of his car, 

"I think she would if she could," Lucie laughed, "so, how's your internet friend?"  

"still only a friend, Luce. Nothing is going to happen," Thomas rolled his eyes. 

For some reason, Lucie was the only person Thomas had officially come out to. Both were slightly drunk at some party, so Matthew whined and complained until Thomas, James, and Christopher came. Then James thought a slight fit when Lucie was there, and to calm him down, Thomas said he would hang out with Lucie to watch out for her. And they both decided hanging out at a party with someone you only knew due to convincing wasn't fun. Hence, they got drinks, and Thomas started to whine about the boy who lived across the sea, a boy he had been slowly falling for since he was fourteen—outing himself in the process. 

He didn't quite know why he wasn't out to his friends. Matthew was bisexual, and they had no problems, but it felt different. Thomas was Thomas the consent; he rarely changed; he was the rock the center, announcing that he was gay felt as if he would break that. 

"you're so boring. Something could happen," Lucie huffed out, looking over at him with a slight grin, "have you tried?" 

"hes Involved with someone," Thomas confessed, puffing out his cheeks before they moved to get in the car. As he flopped down in the driver's seat, Lucie turned to ask.

"like dating?" 

"No, he doesn't get into it." Thomas felt his neck heat up. He wasn't about to tell Lucie James," innocent sister, " that the guy he liked had a relationship with another man just so they could sleep together.

"so they sleep together," Lucie causally let slip, almost causing Thomas to crash his car as he started to pull out of his parking spot.

"Lucie!" Thomas shouted, slamming on the break. 

"am I wrong?" Lucie laughed.  

"no, I just didn't want you to say it," Thomas confessed, 

"Well, if it's causal, then maybe they won't last," Lucie suggested, a thought that had run through Thomas's head many times. One that some days helped him feel better. 

"It's been a good ten months." Thomas shrugged. Didn't these agreements always end with feelings? 

"You're counting?" Lucie side-eyed him, earning a huff from Thomas. 

"Luce" 

"anyways... Cordelia's brother is gay," Lucie had pulled out her phone just as Thomas pulled onto the street,

"So?" Thomas asked, raising his eyebrow. Why did he care if Cordelia's brother was gay? 

"Look, I don't want Cordelia to have any reason not to return to London or avoid London, and she and her brother are close? So I was thinking if he had friends in London, maybe he would take a job with the place he is interning at, then Cordelia could come to visit more often," Lucie pushed out, dropping her phone onto her lap,

"And you think setting him up with me is the best way to do that? I've had no experience with any gender, and I'm hard-crushing on a boy I've never met." Thomas sighed, 

"I don't need you two to date, but you know it's a good ground to talk on and maybe become friends," Lucie shrugged. " Just think about it, okay?" 

"Alright," 

It was nearly 9 p.m. when Thomas read the last message from Alastair,

'I know my logic is flawless.' Then, only an hour later, 'I broke it off with the guy,'

'WHAT!!!!' Thomas nearly screamed as he re-read the message to check as if he had read it wrong, but it was in black and white. Alastair was no longer seeing the man he was sleeping with. 

'I know you didn't like him,' Alastair responded after a moment,

'Still, you did,' Thomas sighed; Alastair was hiding his emotions from things. Sometimes, Thomas let him, but he wouldn't make it slide this time.

'It just….' Thomas watches the 'alastair_c is typing' go off and on, then off again before a message pops up in the chat history. 'It just wasn't working; he wants to keep the gay thing on the side, and I don't anymore. It's going to be awkward all summer,' Alastair confessed after long moments of deliberation,

'Why?' Thomas was starting to feel lousy pushing, but, at the same time, Alastair would just shut him down if he went to fair.

'We have the same summer internship. He bought his way in with his mom's money and name. My professor fought for me to get the spot, so I'm not giving it up,' Alastair's messages were quicker now, now that they were back to just facts, not emotions,

'You shouldn't have to. You work so hard,' Thomas felt he needed to tell Alastair that. He needed to say to the boy who worked the graveyard shift, who helped take care of his mother, who hid his father's illness' who protected his sister from everything that Alastair didn't need to bend to someone else whim, not this time.

'You're sweet, but he refuses to give it up either. I told him we could work together and pretend nothing happened, but he kept citing that hes from London, and I'm not.'

'What does that have to do with anything??'

'The internship is in London,'

'Where you not gonna tell me you were in my home terf????' Thomas pushes himself up from his bed; Alastair would be in reach for once.

'I didn't want you to feel as if you needed to invite me to hang out,'

'But I want to.' Thomas's heart started to race. This was Alastair; he would be close, and the man thought Thomas wouldn't want to meet him. Sure, they had all learned as kids to avoid meeting people you talk to online, but Thomas had video-chatted with Alastair. Some days, Thomas thought Alastair might know him better than his friends. 

' I'm sure we can figure something out.' Alastair went offline, leaving Thomas to debate his near future.