Chapter 1
Her Chocobo cawed nervously, halting it's run. It had spotted the pack of Gorgonopsids a ways ahead. Lightning urged the bird on and it picked up speed at its riders command, trampling through the pack quicker than their jaws could react. The soldier slipped from its back just as it was passing the last one, weapon at the ready as she hit the ground. She had counted five before charging and none had gone chasing after the Chocobo. All accounted for, she thought. Tch, nothing I can't handle. She pushed off, striking out at the closest one then spun on her heels, whipping her gunblade around to defensively hit another as it lunged at her from behind, smacking it right in it's enormous jaws. Another pounced at her and she rolled out of its path just in time. She outstretched her arm quickly and with some mental strain she willed her magic forward, casting a fire at the growling Gorgonopsids that were prowling up to her. The spell hit the centre one, dazing it as the others scattered. Lightning took her chance and dashed forward, bringing her weapon over her head and swinging down with all her might. The Gorgonopsid growled angrily at her before it's body turned black and it dissolved into the air.
"You're going down!" she snarled at its pack mates, slashing her way forward, dispatching another two on her way. One attacked her from behind, and she gasped in pain and surprise as it's claws raked along her forearm. She glared at the creature and ran at it, thrusting her weapon forward as she did. As the site of impact turned black she wasted no time in turning to face the last one. It roared in defiance and she quickly dodged the vicious swipe of its claws, parring quickly. As the last wisps of black dust vanished Lightning scanned her surroundings. All clear. She sighed, relaxing her stance and sheathed her weapon. She held a hand above her injured arm and as green light encompassed her limb she could feel her skin begin to tingle and the wounds heal. I don't know how it's possible, but this makes the job a lot easier sometimes, she smiled to herself. She activated her comm device,
"All clear."
"How was it?" Captain Amodar answered.
"Just another battle, Sir. Gorgonopsid pack."
"Well, good work out there. I'll send the construction teams over."
"Should I stay on patrol?"
"Nah, that should have been the last ones. I'll send a new guard patrol over to oversee"
"But, Sir" Lightning protested.
"You've been at it since dawn, Farron. Time to call it a day. Oh and say hi to Serah for me."
Lightning made an amused sound. Even the captain knows its get together night? I guess things really have changed.
"Sure thing." she said and switched off the comm.
Looking around, Lightning couldn't see the Chocobo anywhere and she cursed under her breath before letting out a long high pitched whistle. That's when the pain hit, sudden and unmerciful this time. That familiar brutal stab through her brain, that made her head feel like it was splitting in two. Her lungs refused to work as she tried to draw in air. And then the screaming started. She could pick out her friends' voices occasionally, but mostly it was just a sea of noise. That was, until Barthandelus spoke. His voice was clear and it drowned out the rest while he spoke, but only when he spoke.
"Save them Lightning, they need you...or are you too weak?" His words were different from time to time, but it was always the same theme, she always had to save them. Shit, she cursed, wiping the sweat from her brow as her breathing began to even out. She slowly regained herself as the episode withdrew and the Chocobo trotted up making a curious sound at its rider.
"Don't you start" Lightning said, stroking it's feathers a little before jumping on."Time to go home."
As the hot water rained down on her it felt blissful, comforting even. As if she could just forget everything and stay there all night. But I have to go, she urged herself. Do you? Of course she did. Serah expected her and it's not as if she asked much of her older sister. One night a week to get together. That's all. Just one night. If she was being honest with herself she liked it once she was actually there, being able to see everyone....mostly everyone, she corrected herself. She sighed in resignation before turning the water off and stepping out of the shower. As she sat on her bed towelling her hair dry her thoughts drifted to a certain Pulsian who'd probably be telling her to 'stop bein such a bore and get your arse out' right now. She smiled fondly at the thought, but was shortly interrupted by the buzz of her phone.
"Hey, Light."
"Hey."
"Just checking to see if you were still coming later?"
Lightning huffed in amusement. Serah always rang to check or encourage, just like an external conscience. She paused to think, unsure of her decision.
"Aww come on sis" Serah whined, sensing her sisters doubts.
"Fine...I just," she chewed on her lower lip for a moment. "I'll be a little late. I...want to go see them on my own this time. I just..."
"It's okay, Claire" Serah answered softly. She was grateful Lightning had been honest and wanted to avoid pushing her too much, but she had to make sure. "Whatever you need, but...your okay, right?"
"Yea. I just had one of those headaches again. That's all"
"Why not go see a doctor again, maybe-"
"No, Serah" Lightning bit at her suddenly. She was through seeing people, of medication and of people wanting her to talk. She was fine, more sociable than she’d ever been. It was just stress from living a normal life after everything. A shock to her system, that all. The headaches and dreams would vanish eventually. or so she told herself.
"But Lightning" Serah pressed, her voice full of worry.
Lightning rubbed her temple with her free hand, "I'm fine okay...I'll see you later" she tried to keep her tone even this time.
"...okay, see you then" Serah said hesitantly.
Lightning could still hear the worry in the younger woman's voice but with a sting of guilt chose to ignore it, "Bye."
Lightning stood looking at the floor for a long time, as if admiring how it gleamed in the light. But truthfully it was just to avoid looking at the reason she was here.
"Hey Fang, Vanille." she started, "how about you come with me tonight to see everyone?" silence answered her as always. She clenched her fists tightly until her knuckles turned white. "We...I miss you" she said, looking up at the women."So please...wake up" she closed her eyes tightly and willed it to be true, "just wake up!" but nothing changed and although she hadn't expected it to, it still felt just as disappointing as always. "I'm sorry" she whispered, "It's just a short one today...I'll see you again soon." She lingered a few moments longer and then took her leave.
As she walked into the bar it looked like everyone was in the midst of a good time, playing games or chatting.
"Hey, you!" Lebreau came up suddenly in front of her while she was giving the place a once over. The soldier's hand unintentionally twitched towards her weapon, that she knew she hadn't brought. Although shed managed to catch herself quickly Lebreau frowned at her, noticing the action."You look tense. Have a drink with me and relax, okay?" The brunette linked her arm and steered her forward before she could protest, sitting her down at a nearby table."What do you want?" Lebreau asked, cocking her head towards the bar.
"Shots, maybe?"
"That bad huh?" Lebreau asked, raising her eyebrows in mock emphasis. The gesture made the soldiers lips pull upwards slightly.
"Not really, just a long day".
"Shots it is" Lebreau winked at her.
Lightning felt arms wrap around her and someone hug her from behind. "Serah," She said as she placed a hand on her sisters arm and squeezed tightly,"about earlier,"
"It's okay, Light. I'm just happy you’re here" Serah said, resting her head on Lightnings contently.
"Aren't you two just adorable" Lebreau grinned as she placed the tray full of shots on the table. Lightning couldn't suppress her eye-roll as Serah nodded in agreement. "Wanna join us?" the brunette offered.The three sat talking, laughing at memories and saying hello to whoever would come over from time to time until the shot glasses turned to empties.
"Same again girls?" Lebreau stood.
Lightning nodded and watched as Serah stood up too. "Not for me" she giggled, "I'm going to go mingle."
"Light weight," Lebreau laughed.
"Look after her" Serah smiled back at woman, gesturing towards her sister.
Lightning tutted at her, "from what? The evil Lobos?" she said sarcastically.
"I will" Lebreau shushed her. "Especially from the Lobos" She added for the soldiers benefit.
Drinking with Lebreau wasn't a strange occurrence and the two easily went another round before Lightning was hit with the effects of the alcohol. The room didn't feel quite as still as it should have and her body tingled, or was it the vibrations from the music? She didn't really care. And as the world around her blurred more, she found she laughed more freely at her friends jokes, much to Lebreau’s enjoyment. As a third tray came and went she failed to notice Lebreau’s lingering stares, the subtle touches or the way she had moved closer. By the fourth tray she had forgot herself and was laughing uncontrollably at the woman’s impression of Snow. Her sides ached as she wiped the tears away from her eyes,
"it's been such a good night" she managed finally, taking another shot.
"You know, Light..." Lebreau said as she casually placed a hand on top of Lightnings, her voice low but still audible. "We could always make it better." Lebreau leaned in close.
And everything was swirling, the music buzzed in Lightning’s ears. Her heart thumped hard in her chest as her breathing quickened and she closed her eyes to help fight the wave of queasiness that hit her. "Whaddaya say?" Lebreau whispered in her ear.
"Huh?" Lightning quirked an eyebrow."Ah jeez, Light. Where you even listenin?" Fang shook her head. She grinned and looked the soldier straight in the eyes, "I was thinkin about bunking with you tonight, whaddaya say?" the grin intensified.The Pinkette scoffed at her comrade, "that's not what you said, Fang.""Well a girls gotta try n’ take her chances" she joked. Lightning threw her a sideways glance before looking out into the darkened forest, staying silent. Fang looked the woman up and down, watching as the flame light danced on her back. What are the chances I’d meet someone like you in all of this, huh?Lightning could feel the Pulsian’s eyes on her, but she kept her arms folded, refusing to show any signs of discomfort. Etro, why does she find it so amusing to wind me up? Lightning inwardly sighed."I can tell you’re thinkin ‘bout me" Fang breathed next to her ear.Fuck, when had she gotten so close? Lightning spun round instinctively at the shock, fist flying in the woman's direction. Tanned fingers wrapped around her wrist before she managed to hit her target.
"I-I wasn't, I," Lightning stammered.Fang hummed in response.
"Sure you weren't, Sunshine." she teased, stepping in close to the soldier. Lightning unintentionally stepped back at the proximity, flinching as her back collided with a tree. Fang grinned closing the gap once more, by the Fal’Cie how it thrilled her to torture the woman like this."Bet your not thinking of me at all," she mocked with a grin. Enjoying the pink appearing on the shorter woman's cheeks. Slowly she leaned down, watching as Lightnings gaze fixed on her lips, stopping as they almost touched the soldiers.She felt so warm, the heat over powering the queasy sensation in her stomach. As their lips kept crashing together, she felt like everything beyond was blurred from her perception.
"...Fang." she muttered. The music gradually grew louder in her ears. No, she thought, this isn't right….She knew Fang had not kissed her then. She'd smirked arrogantly and pulled away, sauntered away and called back, ‘Have fun not thinkin’ about that now’ and winked. So then...what? She opened her eyes slowly as she pulled away from the warm lips pressed against her own. The soldier wore a confused expression that soon turned into one of fear as the reality of the situation hit and tears stung her eyes. Lebreau froze, unable to react to the sight before her. Never had she seen the woman so fragile.
"I…I'm sorry" Lightning rasped as she fought to control her emotions.
All irritation fell from Lebreau's face as she reached out and placed a hand cautiously on Lightning's shoulder, squeezing gently.
"Hey...hey, its alright" she soothed. Feeling the Pinkette’s body trembling. The shock had sobered Lebreau up fast and she was thankful to have her senses back to help deal with the mess that was unfolding in front of her.
Lightning gritted her teeth and inwardly raged. She was mad. Mad at making a fool of herself, mad she'd let herself get into this situation, and mad she had probably hurt her friend. Lightning, you complete idiot! She berated herself.
Lebreau shuffled closer and pulled her into a soft hug.
"So Fang, huh?" she asked with a smile after a few moments. The sympathetic tone lost on Lightning as she promptly shrugged away the embrace.
"I have to go" She said, standing up a little too quickly and stumbling a few steps. A large gloved hand grabbed her arm to help steady her.
"Hey Sis, Where's the fire?" Snow joked. Receiving a harsh shove as the soldier headed for the door.
Lebreau shook her head, "I should go talk to her."
Serah waved her hand to silence the brunette, "She’s crashing at ours tonight. She'll be halfway there by now the way she walks." she said, pulling on her jacket. "We were heading home anyway, why don't you come?" Lebreau hesitated,her thoughts conflicted. Maybe it would make things worse, but she also felt guilty and wanted to apologise and make sure things were okay. Serah sensed her reluctance and smiled. "Come on, you can fill us in on the way anyway."
Lightning hissed as the cold air hit her. Should of brought a damn jacket she thought, wrapping her arms around herself. She walked at a fast pace towards Serah’s house, replaying the scene over in her mind. Anger clouded her vision once more and in one swift motion she punched the wall of a nearby building with a growl. She stopped to compose herself and felt her gaze drawn towards the form of Cocoon hanging in the sky and the crystal pillar that suspended it there. It looked beautiful but she found it hard to look at. The structure brought mixed emotions, anger, betrayal, sadness, and if she was honest with herself, regret. She missed her friends sealed within but there was nothing she could do except keep going. They had managed to carve out several caverns and pathways through the crystal and she often visited when she was alone. But it was never enough. She sighed as Fang’s arrogant smile flashed through her head and shook the memory away.
"Light!" she heard her name in the distance. Tch. she rolled her eyes and continued on her way, slower this time so that Serah and Snow could catch up. As she reached Serah's street she could hear the hurried footsteps just behind her and quirked an eyebrow without looking back, three? Lebreau? Her stomach hurt with embarrassment.
"How...fast...do you have to...walk, Light!?" Serah panted as they reached her door. Serah grabbed the handle and stood in front of her sister before Lightning could step forward, a scowl firmly painted on her face. "Don’t pretend you didn't hear me calling either, Claire" she said taking a step closer, coming face to face with her sister.
The soldier winced and looked away at the sound of her real name and the proximity.
"Sorry" she murmured.
Serah huffed and turned away making her way into the house and to the kitchen. Lightning walked slowly down the hall towards her make shift room for the night without so much as a glance at the others, her patients wearing thin.
Serah caught Lebreau's awkward expression and nodded in Lightnings direction.
"Second door on the right."
Lebreau nodded and walked slowly to her destination.
Lightning closed the door silently behind her and dropped onto the bed face first, inhaling deeply the scents of the newly washed covers. A gentle knocking broke the silence.
"It's open" She said pushing herself up, blushing slightly as the brunette stepped into the room closing the door behind her.
"I-er, I wanted to say sorry for earlier" Lebreau said, "I didn't mean to upset you, or take advantage or anything".
Lightning sighed and patted the bed next to her. Turning to her side as Lebreau sat down next to her. She placed a firm hand on Lebreau’s shoulder, mirroring the woman’s gesture from earlier.
"You don't have anything to be sorry for," She shook her head slowly. "You didn't upset me. And you didn't take advantage." she said, staring directly into the dark eyes before her. "We were both pretty drunk. It's on me. All of it."
"I just thought we were having a good time. I got a bit carried away, you know?" Lebreau half smiled.
"We were" Lightning assured her. "I just wasn't ready and..."
"Your still hung up on her" Lebreau squeezed the soldier’s hand affectionately.
"It's not like that" Lightning denied and then fell silent, unable to say anything else.
"At least I was right about you swinging that way!" Lebreau chimed, erupting with a giggle. Lightning joined in too, knowing there was no need to deny it. Once they had settled down Lebreau squeezed her hand again before standing.
“Lebreau” Lightning blurted “…we’re still friends, right?”
“Of course” Lebreau smiled down at her warmly, "but Lightning, I'm here if you ever wanna talk...or more." she said with a hushed voice, leaning down and kissing the pinkette on the forehead. “Goodnight.” She left the room quietly and swiftly without waiting for any kind of reply.
Lightning sat, unmoving with a deadpan expression, as the residual warmth on her forehead disappeared. She groaned and lay her head on the pillow, running her fingers through her hair. Lightning, you dumbass.