Chapter 2
Kara woke up with her head pounding but her whole body warm. Without opening her eyes she tried to stretch but found that she couldn't move. There was someone hugging her.
She was on top of someone.
She must've fallen asleep last night on Alex's couch. She recalls being drunk as hell but that doesn't explain the warm body beneath her.
Then, Kara takes a breath and she is assaulted by the most comforting scent on Earth.
Lena.
At that thought, Kara immediately blinks awake and tries to contain a gasp as her eyes open to the sight of Lena's sleeping face. Lena was still asleep; Kara on top of her whilst both of Lena's arms wrap securely around Kara's waist, as if to hold her there.
Kara's mind short-circuits at the sudden onslaught of mental images popping up in her mind. She remembers arriving at Alex's and panicking when she saw Lena. She remembers Nia pulling her aside and giving her a drink. She remembers drinking. She remembers getting drunk. She remembers almost falling to her face and-
"Hey! You look like my best friend."
Oh.
Oh, no.
Kara's brain was now scrambling to a panic.
"Ten seconds."
"Yeah. You're not selfish, Kara."
"Can you keep another secret?"
"It's her brother."
"Lex?"
"Yes."
Lena must've noticed a change in her breathing and Kara's tense, wiggly movements because in less than 5 seconds Lena also blinks awake. Kara stays quiet; unmoving and silently observing Lena as consciousness dawns on her. She was too scared to move. After all, this is the first time that they've seen in each other for months and here Kara was, already fucking it up by getting drunk and falling asleep on top of her best friend.
(Ex-best friend?)
She doesn't even remember how she fell asleep. How had Lena let Kara fall asleep on her? Why did she let her? How had the conversation ended? So does Lena know? About the threat? About Lex? Did Kara really blurt it all out in a drunken stupor?
Rao, what a shitshow.
"Mm, morning." Lena's sleep-laden voice made her freeze. Rao, how long has it been since they had a proper sleepover?
"Hi." Kara mutters quietly, still unmoving as she watches Lena remove one arm from her waist to rub sleepily at her eyes.
"Does your head hurt?" Kara still doesn't know what to do. She thinks she should probably answer Lena and tell her she needs one of those DEO alien hangover pills from Alex's medicine cabinet, but she's frozen and confused and is suffering a hangover.
A very, very, major hangover.
I'm going to kill Nia.
"Alex told me to give you some pills if you woke up with a headache." Lena says, stifling a yawn. "And if you're wondering where they all are, they left to get breakfast and-" Lena spoke calmly as if aware of how Kara is feeling; as if aware that Kara's mind was looking for Alex, for Sam, for anyone who can rescue her from this situation right now.
If Kara was being honest and real right now, she knows that Lena is very much aware of how Kara is feeling. She is her best friend after all, she knows how to read Kara, knows what she's feeling and knows exactly what to give.
Kara waits for Lena to continue talking, being brave and looking directly at her friend's eyes; pretending that the warmth seeping in from Lena's body to hers isn't affecting her.
"-to give us time to talk." Lena finishes and waits for Kara to reply.
Lena wonders if Kara remembers anything at all from last night. Does Kara remember how she told Lena everything; how she thought Lena was a stranger that looked like her best friend? Was Kara aware of how they ended up in this exact sleeping arrangement? Would she like to talk about what happened? Or would this finally be the breaking point for their friendship?
Lena has so many questions she needs answered. But Kara looks like she might cry right now, and oh, God, I really need caffeine before all of this.
"Talk, yeah-uhm talk. I-uh, I don't remember much from last night." Kara admits and she burrows her head in the space between Lena's neck and the couch pillow, which was a mistake because she can now smell Lena's scent stronger than before and it is messing with her brain.
"I uh-I remember getting drunk and mistaking you for erm-a person who resembles Lena, which is pretty funny," Kara lets out a nervous laugh, muffled by the cushions. Lena feels the vibrations course through her and tries to will her heart to calm down.
"Yeah, it was a bit funny." Lena agrees, "But you don't remember the rest?"
"Uhm, they're a little fuzzy. I remember telling you I missed you." At that, Kara raises her head and forces herself to look at Lena's eyes again to show her how genuinely she had truly missed her and that last night was real.
"I remember telling you, you're my sun." Kara continues and Lena is trying so hard to contain her emotions inside right now, because Kara was piercing her soul with those blue eyes and she has nowhere to escape.
And then Kara's voice turn from sincere to shy, "But-uh, I don't remember falling asleep. Or how this-" Kara frees one of her hand to gesture, "happened."
Lena takes a deep breath to steel herself for the upcoming conversation. She has to tell Kara everything that happened last night, and she has to talk about the entire situation regarding Lex.
God, it was such a mess.
"Well, why don't we start light?" And then, Kara feels Lena shift as if she was planning to sit up so they can talk like proper adults. Kara feels herself panic. She doesn't want Lena to move. She wans to prolong this position as long as possible; knowing that by the end of this talk things will change. She might never get this chance to be this close to Lena again, so she decides to be brave.
"Wait, can we-uh just stay like this? I just-I missed you. And I know things aren't really the same. But can we at least have this?" Kara asks, voice small but sincere.
Lena takes one look at Kara and she knows she can't refuse.
There's a beat of silence.
"Yeah, okay. Sure." Lena says, and then adds, "And uhm I uh- I missed you too. Just so you know."
Kara can't help the tiny spark of hope that shouts that maybe, maybe they'll be okay.
"So, uh-how did we end up here? Asleep. On Alex's couch?" Kara asked, peering into Lena's eyes.
"Well, uh okay. Remember how drunk you were? Alex was forcing you to move to the bed. You didn't want to-" Lena paused as if unsure if she should continue. Kara tried not to show her anxiousness show.
"You said, you'd only sleep if I were next to you." Lena finished, Kara didn't know what to do with that.
Her heart was racing from what Kara had just said.
And now, Alex--with Sam and Kelly--had stridden in to the living room from wherever hiding place they came from. Lena wasn't stupid. She knew Alex had been listening in. She knows that all of them was left in the dark and was just as curious as Lena was. She couldn't fault them for eavesdropping. To be frank, right now? She was grateful that they had eavesdropped because she has no idea how she was going to break that news to Alex; or Sam it seems like, for that matter
Alex had a tight expression on her face. Sam was giving Lena this look that meant 'You and I have a lot to discuss,later.' That look was reserved for business meetings, where she and Sam need a secret language to gang up on treacherous investors. Kelly just gave her a sympathetic look.
But before any of them can address the elephant in the room, Kara speaks up again; loudly.
"Sam!! Have I told you how much I missed you?!" Kara then shoots up from the couch almost trips over the coffee table and then wraps herself around Sam.
"Yes. Yes you did. I missed you too." Sam's voice was tight, probably because the Kryptonian has her in death grip. Alex sees the situation, turns to Lena sighs—as if she wants to say more—but relents and helps Sam break free from Kara instead.
"Thanks." Sam mutters breathlessly, Kara turns to Alex then, "Heyyyy! Why'd you do that?! I was only hugging SAAaam." Kara's words were slurring more than before now.
"You were hugging her too tight, Kara. She's human remember? And humans are?"
"Fragile.” Kara answers, “Humans are fragile." She finishes like a child that has been chastised; like she's been asked this question way too many times before and she really doesn't like the answer.
"Yeah, that's right." Alex coos, "We better get you to bed, Sam needs to sleep and you do too. Come on," Alex starts to guide Kara. But Kara moves away from her, quick as lightning and then whines, "Noooo, I don't want to go to bed."
"Kara," Alex starts, "Nooo, I'm going to fly to L-Corp first."
At that Lena's head immediately shoots up from where she’s sat on the couch. Alex meets her eyes and there's a moment of understanding.
"Kara, you can't fly right now. You're drunk." Alex reasons but somehow ‘drunk Kara’ is more stubborn.
"Then you drive me there! Come on then, Alex. I gotta see Lena. We just have to be very, very, very quiet though. So she doesn't know we're there." Kara exclaims but then whispers the last part like some secret instruction.
"Kara, Lena probably isn't at L-Corp anymore. You can go tomorrow. For now we have to get you to bed." Alex tries to make her sister listen to reason.
"NooOoo! I know her, Alex. She's probably overworking herself. I just-please? I have to see her." Kara breathes out, and Lena isn't shocked that Kara still knows that if it were any normal night, she would still be at L-Corp, 'probably overworking herself.'
She sees Alex throw her a pleading look from across the room.
Lena stands from where she is, and walks to where Kara and Alex were.
"Hey, Kara," She starts and Kara's eyes flick up to hers and there's a brief flash of recognition.
"Lena?"
"Yeah."
"You're here?"
"Yeah, this is Sam's party remember?"
Kara's eyes go from hers to Alex's and then Sam's and then realization dawns on her.
"You're here. You're really here." Kara whispers as if in awe.
"I am." Lena answers; trying to keep the emotions off of her voice.
The next thing Kara does makes Lena's breathing stop. She moves forward and throws both arms around Lena. Lena is then enveloped by warmth and Kara's scent and for a moment everything is right with the world.
"You're here. You're here." Kara chants as she tightens her grip. Lena panics for a moment that Alex would realize that Kara's grip was tighter than normal and force them to break apart.
But no Alex comes between them and for a few short moments it was just she and Kara locked in a long overdue embrace.
Lena makes the mistake of opening her eyes and realizes that Sam and Kelly has now left the room—probably thought it was a good idea to leave them alone—it was only Alex now.
And so, Lena tries to be the bigger person. She pulls away slowly but not completely, just enough so she can cup Kara's face and make Kara listen to her.
"Hey, darling, as much as I like hugging, we need to get you to bed." She says, careful not to trigger Kara's already emotional state.
To both her and Alex's surprise, Kara just answers with an, "Okay. Yeah."
She starts to guide Kara back to the couch and then she hears Alex tell her that she was just going to get a couple of pillows and a blanket for Kara.
Once Alex was out of the room, she lets Kara lay back down on the couch. And then Alex was back all too soon and she's passing Kara a pillow and Lena knows that it's probably time for her to leave now.
There's a lot to think about tonight. Not to mention she most certainly needs to talk to Alex, the DEO and the rest of L-Corp's security team. It was going to be a fucking busy day tomorrow and Lena just wants to go home, now.
She looks at Alex and Kara from a moment. She was just a few steps away from them. Alex was tugging the blanket higher. Kara was whispering something.
She needs to say a few words to Alex before she leaves though. But then, Alex's head turn to her and she calls for her, "Lena."
"Yes?"
"Kara has something to say to you." Alex lets out and there's this look to her that Lena knows she should add to the already long list of thing she needs to talk to Alex about.
Lena moves forward and kneels by the couch's side so she can hear Kara clearly. Lena Luthor on her knees, what a sight.
"What is it, Kara?" She asks, slowly.
"Stay."
"Oh."
"Yeah. That's uh-that's what happened. You asked me to stay. We didn't want you to throw another fit. So Alex just lent me some sweats and then you fell asleep not long after."
Lena explains, and then looks to Kara who was still oh-so-conveniently draped on top of her. Lena would be lying if she says she's not enjoying this.
She knows she was being weak letting herself be with Kara like this. But she cannot help herself. Every night ever since their fallout Lena had lain in bed wondering when she can Kara have like this, if she can ever be this close to Kara again.
"Oh. Okay. Yeah, that makes sense."
Kara looks at her, unsure but eyes bright; as if to ask, what now?
“You promised me, that you weren’t going to lie to me again.” Lena lets the statement hang in the air.
“Don’t even try to say you did it to protect me, Kara.” At that, Kara bolts out from their position, sits up and then exclaims, “But I did! I did it for your protection, Lena.”
Lena closes her eyes, sits up as well and then lets out a sigh, “Kara, this is my life. I get to decide whether or not a decision will keep me safe or not. You don’t get to decide that for me. And you don’t get to lie to me again.” Lena stated, her voice sounding tired.
“I needed to keep you safe.” Kara begins, “If I had told you the truth you would have gone to drastic measures and Lex would’ve easily found a way to take you down. I didn’t want you making any movements. It was me he threatened and it was me who needed to deal with it.” Kara speaks methodically, making sure that Lena was listening to her. She needed Lena to know that she didn’t do this to hurt her.
“And you didn’t even think for a moment, that we’re a team? That maybe if you would have just told me the truth, told me your fears then maybe I wouldn’t do something as drastic as you’re implying? That maybe I might’ve actually listened to you and helped you to fight? To figure out a plan? God, Kara I thought we were better than this.” Lena exhales, rubbed at her temples and looks to Kara again; who was fiddling with the edges of the blanket.
“I thought we were past being martyrs and self-sacrificing idiocy. I can’t comprehend how you even reached that decision. How easily you just cut me off like that; Kara how could you do that?” Okay, that statement stung. Kara feels her throat get tight with repressed emotions.
“It wasn’t easy. Rao, it was so hard, you have no idea, Lena. I didn’t want to cut you off. I—“
Lena cuts her off, “Save it. Tell me, did you even at least get a lead? That you are now close to capturing Lex? Tell me that those fucking months weren’t for nothing.” Lena demands. Lena was fuming now, she was fuming and hurt and God, there are unshed tears shining in her eyes right now.
“I’ve tracked down all of Lex’s underground operation. I was going to tell Alex this week. So the DEO can help.“ Kara voices out; blue eyes avoiding Lena.
“Were you ever going to tell me? Were you even going to call for my help? Were you even going to let me know that my brother is once again involved?”
“I was going to go to you after.” Kara mutters, “After we had caught Lex. I was planning to confess everything to you.” She clarifies and her eyes bore through Lena’s that Lena can’t help staring straight back.
“So, what? You were just going to tell me when everything was already over? You were just going to pretend that nothing happened; that you had played hero and saved me once again. Was that it? Was that the plan?” Lena spat, she can’t help it. She’s so angry and so scared at the implication of what Kara had said. Kara would be heading into danger—danger that her brother had caused—without Lena knowing; without Lena knowing that Kara was going to be hurt. How can Kara just treat this so lightly? How did she think it was okay to head into danger at Lena’s expense and think that Lena would be fine with it?
Lena would never be fine at the thought of something harmful coming Kara’s way.
“No, Lena. That wasn’t—no. I—“ Rao, how had all this go so wrong? “I wanted to tell you after, because I wanted to make sure that Lex was gone for good before contacting you again. I needed to make sure you were totally, completely safe before being with me again.” Kara says it so desperately, like her voice was pleading to make Lena listen to her side of the story.
But Lena was hurt; months and months of no contact, of letting her blame herself for the fallout. For three months she had thought she had done something wrong again that made Kara turn away. How was she supposed to be just okay with it?
“Still! That isn’t enough reason to cut me off! I know you were scared but I thought you trusted me enough to know everything.” Lena raises her voice, “Because, Kara if someone had threatened me, my first instinct would be to tell you, to fight for you, to show you ‘El Mayarah’ for fuck’s sake. It’s your goddamn family motto, Kara! You taught me that.” Kara flinches and in that moment she wishes she could take it all back.
“You made me believe I did something wrong, Kara. You made me believe that I wasn’t ever going to see you again. Do you know how much that hurts?” Lena croaks out and she hates how weak her voice sounds.
Kara’s tears finally fall and her voice finally breaks, “Lena, I’m so, so sorry. I-I didn’t want to hurt you. I swear I- I was just trying to keep you safe.”
“Maybe you did keep me safe from Lex. But you did hurt me. You made it hurt like hell.” It hadn’t occurred to Kara that the one thing she needs to keep Lena safe from was Kara, herself.
The words hang in between them and Lena is waiting for Kara to say something but all she hears are soft sniffles and Lena cannot take this anymore. So, she steels herself, breathes in deep, she knows this drill; she had done this in the conference room so many times before.
Deep breaths, neutral voice and a sharp cutthroat statement, “I’ll be going into the DEO today, we’ll proceed with the operations with me on board, whether you like it or not. Lex needs to be stopped and I don’t fucking care if it costs me my life.” She sees Kara’s eyes widen at Lena's words and she looks like she was about to protest but Lena remains undeterred, “Call Alex, tell her I want a briefing as early as possible.” Lena then stands and leaves a stunned Kara on the couch.
She gets her things and her clothes from last night and she hears Kara’s panicked shuffling from behind her.
“Wait, Lena wait no—just wait come on, that’s it?”
“Yes, Kara, that’s it. We take Lex down, you play hero, the world is saved once again. That’s it.”
“But what about—what about us?”
“You should’ve made those ten seconds, fifteen.” Lena knows it was cruel.
But she was a Luthor, she had no time to lose, no tears to shed and a brother to defeat.