Voices in my Head
Adrien wakes up in a hospital bed. Next to him is Alix, asleep and wearing an arm and leg cast
Adrien: Hello?
He tries to get up
Adrien: Ow! Ow ow ow ow ow!
Alix wakes up and speaks with a lisp
Alix: Feels like you're missing a part of yourself, doesn't it?
Adrien: ...Rachel?... You have a lisp?
Alix: Yep. And when my Squip shut off? It hurt like a mother-fucker! Be honest: what are they saying about me at school?
Adrien says nothing. She cringes
Alix: That bad?
Adrien: Sorry...
Alix: Sorry? I should be thanking you! I'm finally free of that shiny happy hive mind! When I get outta here, the guys are gonna learn to love the real Rachel Goranski!... And the ladies… Oh my God, I'm totally Bi!
Adrien: Your squip's gone? But how?
Alix: Ask your buddy. Anti-social headphones kid? He's been by like, a ton, by the way. What is he, your boyfriend? No judgment. Just curious. Totally Bi. Remember?
Nino enters. He looks to Alix and smiles
Nino: I'm sure some special someone will be lucky to have you, Rachel.
Alix: Aw, you think?
Nino pulls the hospital curtain shut on Alix
Alix: Heeeey!
Adrien: What happened? All I remember is that noise, and...
Nino: Oh man, it was genius! We were communicating with each other – we were linked! Which means... when you consider the kind of high-frequency sonic disturbance needed to wipe a system that powerful...
Adrien: Michael. My head still hurts.
Nino: Right, ah... Turns out you didn't have to destroy every Squip. Just one. And the rest... (He mimes explosions) Boom!...
Adrien: … I don't get it... After everything I did... You were still there for me. Why?
Nino: I can't take all the credit. Your dad can be shockingly persuasive.
Adrien: My dad?
Ivan enters. For the first time in the play, he is wearing real pants
Ivan: Jeremy, are you okay?
Adrien: Actually, I'm great—
Ivan: I'm glad. Because you're grounded. You're going to see some serious changes, young man, starting...
Adrien grins
Adrien: Dad... You're...wearing...
Ivan: Don't look so surprised. I'm your father. And I wear the pants around here! Now let's get down to business: who's this Christine person, and why did I have to hear about her from him?
Adrien: It doesn't matter. After what I did, I'm lucky if she wants to go to the same school as me.
Nino and Ivan exchange a look
Adrien: What?
Nino: It's reassuring. He still doesn't know anything about girls.
Alix draws back the curtain and grins, revealing that she has been eavesdropping
Alix: Need some advice?
Ivan:
YOU GOTTA BUY HER A ROSE!
COMPLIMENT HER ON HER CLOTHES!
Nino:
SAY YOU APPRECIATE THAT'S SHE'S SMART!
Alix:
NAH, MAN, YOU TELL HER THAT SHE
EXCITES YOU SEXUALLY!
Ivan/Nino/Alix:
AND THAT'S THE WAY YOU GET TO HER HEART!
TRUST ME, I KNOW
HOW IT'S GONNA GO
LISTEN AND, OH—
Adrien:
AND THERE ARE VOICES IN MY EAR
I GUESS THESE NEVER DISAPPEAR
I'LL LET 'EM SQUEAL
AND I WILL DEAL
THEN MAKE UP MY OWN MIND
MIGHT STILL HAVE VOICES IN MY HEAD
BUT NOW THEY'RE JUST THE NORMAL KIND
VOICES IN MY HEAD
BUT NOW THEY'RE THE NORMAL KIND
Adrien gets out of the hospital bed and the scene changes to the school. Adrien stops by his locker and is cornered by Alya, Aurore, Myléne and Kim. They surround him, menacingly
Adrien: Heyyy guys... About what happened—
Kim: We've been looking for you, punk!... To say, good luck asking out Christine!
Adrien: Seriously, how does everyone know about that?
Aurore: It's crazy, but ever since we all did ecstasy at the school play, I've felt really connected to you guys.You tell him, Jenna.
Alya:
JUST SUMMON STRENGTH FROM WITHIN!
Myléne:
DON'T GET HUNG UP ON YOUR SKIN!
Aurore:
SHE PROBABLY THINKS THAT ACNE IS HOT!
Kim:
I'LL THROW YOU A ROPE, HOME SLICE!
IF YOU NEED SOME DOPE ADVICE!
Alya/Myléne/Aurore/Kim:
NOW MARCH ON OVER AND GIVE HER A SHOT!
BUDDY, YOU'LL SEE
IT'LL GO PERFECTLY
IF YOU LISTEN TO ME ME ME!
Adrien:
AND THERE ARE VOICES ALL AROUND
AND YOU CAN NEVER MUTE THE SOUND
THEY SCREAM AND SHOUT
I TUNE THEM OUT
THEN MAKE UP MY OWN MIND
MIGHT STILL HAVE VOICES IN MY HEAD
BUT NOW THEY'RE JUST THE NORMAL KIND
VOICES IN MY HEAD
BUT NOW THEY'RE THE NORMAL KIND
Adrien walks over to Marinette, standing on the other side of the stage, deep in thought
Adrien: Hey… So—
Marinette: I still remember how it felt.
Adrien: What?
Marinette: It was like you said. Like I'd never have to...not know...anything again. Who did yours look like?
Adrien: Calum Worthy and Rain Dove. Yours?
Marinette: Joan of Arc. It's embarrassing...
Adrien: Actually, that one's pretty good.
Marinette: ...to find out, deep down, I just want things to be easy.
Adrien: Yeah, but...who wants things to be hard? Look, I ruined the play. I almost destroyed the school, maybe all human civilization. I know the last thing I deserve is another shot. But I... Uh...
Marinette: Just say what's on your mind, Jeremy.
Adrien: … Lunch? Just the two of us.
Marinette:
AND ANY VOICES IN OUR HEADS?
Adrien:
THERE MIGHT BE VOICES IN OUR HEADS
BUT I SWEAR
THE VOICES THERE
WILL BE THE REGULAR KIND
Marinette:
ME AND THE VOICES IN MY HEAD HAVE MADE UP OUR COLLECTIVE MIND
Adrien:
WHAT DO THEY SAY WE SHOULD DO?
Marinette:
...I THINK THAT ALL OF US WANT TO GO OUT WITH YOU...
Adrien: Woohoo!
Adrien lifts Marinette up and spins her around as she laughs. The rest of the cast make their way over to them
Everybody:
AND THERE ARE VOICES IN MY HEAD!
SO MANY VOICES IN MY HEAD AND THEY CAN YELL
AND HURT LIKE HELL
BUT I KNOW I'LL BE FINE
Adrien:
I STILL HAVE VOICES IN MY HEAD
THERE'S VOICES IN MY HEAD
OF THE VOICES IN MY HEAD
THE LOUDEST ONE IS MINE
Suddenly, Marc and Nathaniel appear with red circuits painted on their faces and clothes. Shuffling towards them, weak, but still alive
Nathaniel: Jeremy...
Adrien:
THE LOUDEST ONE IS MINE!
Marc: You can't get rid of us that easy...
Adrien confronts them and crosses his arms. As if banishing them
Adrien:
THE LOUDEST ONE IS MINE!
Nathaniel/Marc: Jerrrrrreeeemmmyyyyy!…
The spotlight on them dims
Everybody:
NA NA NA NA NA NA
NA NA NA NA NA NA
NA NA NA NA NA NA...
Marinette: Ya ready?
Adrien: LET'S GO!
Marinette:
C-C-C-C'MON
C-C-C-C'MON
LET'S GO!
Adrien:
C-C-C-C'MON
C-C-C-C'MON
LET'S GO!
Adrien/Marinette:
C-C-C-C'MON
C-C-C-C'MON
LET'S GO
Adrien and Marinette walk past everyone. For now, at least, the only people that matter are each other
Adrien/Marinette/Aurore/Myléne/Alya/Alix/Kim/Nino:
C-C-C-C'MON
C-C-C-C'MON
LET'S GO
C-C-C-C'MON
C-C-C-C'MON
LET'S GO
C-C-C-C'MON
C-C-C-C'MON
LET'S
Marinette and Adrien embrace each other, and finally kiss, making the audience and the cast go into a frenzy
GO...!
OOOOOHHH! OOOOOHHH!
The curtains close, and the audience continues cheering