i hate you but

It was her first time back on the field. It’d only been two weeks since her last time on the field. She had no idea why, but she felt as though she was that rookie being assigned to Maria Hill’s STRIKE team. Once again, she felt as though she were new to the team; that her guns were way too big for her hands and the knives strapped to her boots and thighs would fall out and she wouldn’t make it back to the kids.

God, is this what it felt like to be a parent? To have to worry about not being able to come back to your family? It was an awful feeling; worrying about anything, really. y/n l/n was not a worrier. She knew the risks of her job, and she’d gladly come to terms with them.

But now, everything was off. Everything was different. Sure, she didn’t go on missions with a death wish, but at that moment, she was more cautious than she’d ever been on the job. She’d meticulously planned out how she stored her weapons on herself, and how she was going to use all of them. Hell, she’d even planned on how to get out from impossible situations like if the ground opened up and suddenly swallowed her whole.

She didn’t care how crazy she looked or sounded. Nor did she care about whether or not Bucky’s arm accidentally got stuck to a giant magnet on the quinjet—it all happened while she was spaced out, unfortunately—because she found herself still worrying about what would happen if she didn’t make it back to the kids.

“Hey, I know it’s hard being away from the kids for the first time, but trust me, you’re a good agent and you’ll make it back to them,” Clint, who noticed the distressed look on y/n’s face, gave her a pat on the back, “just be happy you don’t have a wife to scold you if you get injured.” y/n chuckled at his remark, of course.

“It’s just, with everything that’s happened, I don’t know if the kids are going to be fine without me there, y’know? It all just makes me so nervous,” y/n chuckled awkwardly.

“Well, you have Bucky to help you out with that. He seems to be pretty hands-on when it comes to that kind of stuff,” Sam chuckled, motioning to Bucky who was still stuck to the electromagnet they somehow managed to keep on the quinjet. He’d given up on the arm and stood there, leaning against the magnet as he mindlessly used the applications on the phone.

“He’s stuck to the fucking magnet? How did I not notice that?” y/n broke out in a fit of laughter.

“You noticed. Congratulations. Can you please help me out here?” Bucky pleaded, earning a chuckle from Sam.

“If we wanted you to not be attached to a magnet, we would’ve done it earlier,” Sam snickered, earning a scowl from Bucky.

“Am I the only one who finds it weird that we’re in a flying hunk of metal and that stupid magnet hasn’t done shit to bring the quinjet down? Seriously, isn’t it some kind of a hazard to fly with that thing on the jet?” Rhodey chuckled nervously, eyeing the magnet.

“We had Bruce make some adjustments to it. It’s perfectly safe to be flying around with…unless you have a metal arm and teammates who made Wanda bug to the magnet to attach itself to said arm,” Sam chuckled. Wanda, a sly smirk on her face, nodded along proudly, watching as Bucky tried pulling away from the magnet.

“Alright, that’s enough. We can’t have him exhausted before the mission,” y/n sighed, getting up from her seat and trying to pull Bucky away from the magnet.

“Damn it, I forgot you guys were all lovey-dovey now,” Sam huffed, watching the pair attempting to pull Bucky’s arm off the incredibly powerful magnet.

“Wanda, come on, undo this, please?” y/n pleaded, earning a proud look from Bucky. Wanda, along with the others, frowned before y/n spoke again, “You guys can sic the magnet on him after the mission.”

Bucky’s face fell as the words left her mouth. Of course, she was still going to fuck with him; she was y/n l/n, a thorn in his side. A welcome one, but still, a thorn in his side.

“That’s more like it!” Wanda chuckled at y/n’s remark before letting Bucky’s arm free from the magnet.

“Finally!” Bucky exclaimed, massaging his shoulder where flesh and metal met, the weight of his arm once again making itself known to him.

“Wow, not even a ‘thanks, y/n, you’re the best person on this quinjet’, Barnes?” y/n chuckled, making her way closer to him.

“Thank you for rescheduling my demise, I really appreciate it,” Bucky smiled sarcastically, earning a “no problemo” from y/n.

“We’re about to land so if I were you guys, I’d take a seat,” Bruce spoke from the front, earning nods of agreement from the Avengers before they settled into seats. Unknowingly, Bucky took the seat right next to y/n’s.

“Damn, Barnes, why are you so obsessed with me?” y/n chuckled, her e/c eyes meeting Bucky’s blue eyes.

“I can’t help it. Someone’s got to look after the dead weight of the group,” Bucky grinned proudly.

“Well, if I’m such a dead weight,” y/n paused, a frown on her face, “Can you please have my back out there? It’s just I—” y/n requested, only to be interrupted by Bucky.

“Relax, I’ll always have your back. You’re my girlfriend now, remember?” Bucky chuckled awkwardly, his thumb grazing over her hand reassuringly.

“Right. That,” y/n smiled, letting out a breath she didn’t know she was holding.

“Seriously, you’ll do great and you’ll get back home to them. You don’t have to worry about these types of missions after you’ve fought a giant grape and his army,” Bucky quipped, smiling down at y/n.

“You’re right. I’ve done this thousands of times since I became an agent. A few enhanced aren’t a problem for me,” y/n smiled proudly, resting her head against Bucky’s shoulder.

“That’s the spirit,” Bucky chuckled, still running his thumb over y/n’s hand.

The mission, as expected, was difficult, but everything flew by smoothly. y/n, besides a few cuts and bruises, made it back to the quinjet nearly unscathed as did everyone with another jet trailing behind them, keeping the enhanced contained in special cells.

“I told you ‘twas gonna be fine,” Bucky chuckled, once again settling in the seat next to y/n’s.

“Yeah, sure, whatever,” y/n smiled before mouthing to Wanda, “do it now.”

Before Bucky could do anything again, he felt a familiar tug against his arm, and once again, he was dragged back to the magnet.

“Seriously? You’re doing this again?” he groaned, settling against the magnet knowing damn well he was going to be standing there for a while.

“Yes,” Wanda smiled before turning away, and messing with random apps ads made her download onto her phone. Bucky sighed, there was no getting his arm away from the magnet until the jet landed.

Midflight, y/n’s phone began vibrating in her pocket—she’s surprised it didn’t fall out or break after one of the big falls she took during a mission. She pulled it out of her pocket and checked the number; it was Mike Jonas’ number.

“Hey, Mike,” y/n spoke nervously, awaiting the news she’d been expecting for days.

“So, Mr. and Mrs. Langdon want to take you to court for custody of the kids,” Mike explained cautiously.

“I know. I was there when they threatened to do so,” y/n chuckled nervously.

“But before going at it in court, they want to have a talk. Of course, the lawyers are going to have some sort of involvement in the talk, but still, they want to talk,” Mike continued, earning a nod from y/n.

“A talk? The last time I had a talk with them, this happened. Do they really expect me to show up wherever they want me to show up? I’m not their lackey. I only ever tolerated them for the kids,” y/n scoffed. Everyone’s heads turned to her direction, confused at y/n’s outburst at her phone.

“y/n, they could use this behavior as an example not to keep you as their legal guardian. You have to be civilized with them. And it’s not just you. They want to meet your boyfriend too to see if he’s fit to be around the kids,” Mike explained, earning a groan from y/n.

“How do we know they won’t take us to court either way? What if they find something to use against me?” y/n panicked. She didn’t know, Bucky was motioning to Wanda to let him free, knowing that y/n needed him to be there.

Wanda, immediately noticing Bucky’s death glare and pleading eyes, stopped the magnet from tugging on Bucky’s arm, and in an instant, he was right by y/n’s side, reaching for her free hand. She let out a sigh of relief at the sudden warmth that engulfed her hand.

“We don’t. But you need to be there to convince them not to take this case to court. You need to convince them that you’ll win the case if they even try taking it to court,” Mike explained, trying to convince y/n not to not show up.

“So, Bucky and I have to meet up with the Langdons again?” y/n clarified.

“Why am I involved?” Bucky questioned, only to be hushed by y/n.

“Yes, you’ll just meet with the Langdons and talk,” Mike explained, earning a hum of acknowledgment from y/n. Bucky noticed the way her hand ever so slightly tightened against his as her jaw clenched in frustration. If he wasn’t curious to know who he was

“Will you be there? You said there would be lawyers present?” y/n questioned.

“Yes, I’ll be there as will the Langdons’ lawyer,” Mike confirmed.

“Okay. And it’s not like a courtroom where I have to present evidence and shit, right?” y/n questioned.

“Well, I think it would be smart if you played it off as though it were a courtroom. While talking, you state the evidence you have against them while defending yourself from any of their other attacks,” Mike advised her, earning another hum of acknowledgment from y/n.

“Alright. I can do this. Thanks for helping me out, Mike. I really appreciate it. When are they planning on meeting up with us?” y/ questioned.

“Actually, seeing as the Langdons are very impatient people, you guys are meeting at the fancy restaurant downtown. Le Plateau de Diamants, I believe it was called,” Mike responded, filling y/n with a sense of dread. After a mission, she, who was bound to be a little sore from the mission, had to suck everything up and rub elbows with the rich in a fancy restaurant where she’d inevitably face the kids’ grandparents? God, she was in for a hell of a ride.

“Thanks, Mike. Bucky and I will see you there at noon?” y/n questioned.

“Yes. Please, dress appropriately,” Mike remarked, pulling a chuckle from y/n. The last time he’d seen her, she was in a tank top, and sweatpants—looking like a hot mess. Of course, he doubted her ability to dress for the occasion.

“Got it, thank you, Mike. We’ll see you there,” y/n dropped the call before releasing a huge breath she was holding through the duration of her conversation with Mike. She sighed, letting her head rest on his shoulder before he spoke.

“Who was that and why was my name thrown around?” Bucky questioned, raising a brow at y/n—she didn’t quite see his expression, though.

“So, since you’re my boyfriend, the old pri—I mean the Langdons want to meet both of us with lawyers to see if we’re fit to be taking care of the kids. If they don’t think so, they’re taking us to court,” y/n huffed, her face still buried in Bucky’s shoulder.

“For the custody of the kids? I think I’m pretty fit to take care of the kids,” Bucky quipped, flexing his arm before y/n slammed her palm against it to bring it down.

“That was funny, but there’s no time for jokes. We need to sort this shit out before tomorrow,” y/n smiled tiredly.

“The meeting’s tomorrow? Wait, what do I wear?” Bucky questioned, his expression morphing from one of calmness to that of panic.

“Formalwear. The rich snobs are taking us out for brunch at this fancy French place,” y/n scowled.

“Okay, I can have Wanda help me while you make your way back to the kids. I can handle it, y/n. As a matter of fact, c’mere,” Bucky requested, guiding y/n back to the seats.

“Okay, what the fuck are you planning?” y/n raised a brow at Bucky.

“Relax and take a nap. I promise I won’t pull some sort of prank on you while you’re sleeping,” Bucky chuckled, guiding y/n’s head to his lap where he’d crumpled up his jacket to create a makeshift pillow.

“And you’re sure you won’t draw on my face?” y/n raised a brow at him in suspicion.

“I promise, I won’t give those old bats something to call you out on,” Bucky chuckled reassuringly before y/n’s head hit his lap.

“Thanks, Bucky,” y/n smiled before drifting off.