Forbidden Arrangements
I didn't bother Louis for a fortnight, mostly keeping to myself and staying in my chambers. He never once came to check upon me, instead he was with the Duke probably frolicking in a field of daisies, or something of the sort. I barely ate, barely slept, and hardly bathed in those fourteen days. Margaret tried getting me to talk about it but I couldn't bring myself to. What if she would betray me and inform the people? I couldn't risk the shame that would bring if the Prince were to be exposed. It is time I pulled myself together and faced him. I am done being compliant.
"Margaret, do you know of the Prince's schedule?" I ask as she puts the finishing touches in my hair.
She looks at me through the mirror and purses her lips in thought, "Ah, the advisor did say the Prince would be practicing archery with the Duke."
"Thank you." I say, pulling away as she removes her hands from my hair, "I must see my husband now."
::
There they were, Louis practically all over the Duke. He is behind him, holding Harry's arms in the correct posture for shooting, "You can release the string now." Louis says, looking at the target, Harry's eyes linger on him before fixing his gaze on the target. He is looking at Louis with love in his eyes, something I have never seen before.
I shake my head, I approach them with determination, "Hello Your Highness, Duke." I say curtly.
Louis clears his throat and smiles, it's an irritated smile, something I'm familiar with when he wants me away, "Eleanor, what are you doing? Shouldn't you be with Margaret embroidering?"
I hold in a scoff, "I have no plans today," I look at Harry who is smiling genuinely, "Please allow me to go talk with my husband." I say to him, emphasizing 'husband'.
Harry nods, his smile faltering, "Of course." He bows before leaving.
"What would you like to discuss?" Louis sighs.
"We should take this in private, my Prince."
::
The silence is deafening in his office, I can't remember the last time we were alone. It's awkward but I am determined to get what I want. He is looking at me expectantly, piercing me with his icy blue eyes. Nothing like the look Harry gave him. I only feel malice and irritation from him. "What is it that you would like to discuss?" He says, looking down at his desk.
"I know about your forbidden relationship with the Duke."
He doesn't even flinch, "I do not know what you are talking about, Eleanor."
I scoff, letting out a laugh, "Do you take me for a fool? I see the way he looks at you....and the way you look at him. You both are awfully terrible at hiding it."
Louis squints at me, "You want something."
I nod, "I want to be with child."
He shakes his head, "I do not fancy the woman anatomy, let alone yours."
I roll my eyes, "I didn't say it had to be yours....I want a courtesan."
He looks at me, staring, analyzing me, "That isn't practical."
"You get a courtesan, I want one too!"
"Harry is not a courtesan!" He snaps, offended.
I stay quiet for some time, thinking, "You love him...don't you?"
"Fine, you get your courtesan as long as this stays between us. And do not tell the black haired girl."
"Margaret. Her name is Margaret."
"Whatever her name is, just-do not tell anyone about Harry."
"You have my word."
::
"The Prince tells me that you enjoy the arts?" Harry says. He's wearing an emerald suit. It's awful.
I tried to smile, "The Prince might be seduced by your charms, but I am immune. Sodomite." I sneer.
He frowns, "I am sorry, Princess, I-I did not intend to make you upset. But you have to understand the nature of mine and Louis' relationship."
"I do not have to understand anything."
"Well that isn't fair." Harry frowns.
Louis decided he wanted Harry and I to form a friendship and suggested we ride the horses around the estate. Terrible idea. "Life is not fair, Duke, do you think the women selling their bodies want old, slobbering men entering their bodies?"
He looks like a kicked puppy, "I suppose you are right." He looks at me with sincerity, "I would like to tell you the story of mine and Louis' relationship."
I stare into his eyes, he seems desperate for me to understand, I sigh, "Go on with it."
He grins, "Louis and I grew up together, you see, the other kids did not want to befriend me...but Louis was kind and took to me. We were very inseparable, attached at the hip. I knew...from a very young age that I was different. As we got older I began to see Louis in a different light. Everything he did endeared me even when he was being insufferable, and I would find myself staring at him for too long. On Louis' 15th birthday, I kissed him for the first time, under the stars. He kissed me back, we knew it wasn't right but to us it was, it is. We have been in a secret relationship for ten years, we are in love Eleanor." He looks at me, smiling sadly, "I wish it was different, that you didn't have to be put into this situation."
I nod, "Thank you." I look around our surroundings seeing a few butterflies fly away from the grass, "Can I ask you a question.
He nods, "Yes."
"Have you-have the both of you had sex?"
"Yes. We were each other's firsts."
I look away, hurt, "So I will never produce a true heir."
"I wish I could give you the answer you want."
"That's all I needed to know, thank you, Harry."
::
"Was the Duke pleasant company?" Margaret asks, sitting on my bed, my head on her lap. She's running her fingers through my hair.
"He was...interesting."
"Was he as charming as everyone says?" She giggles.
"I am married!" I laugh.
"What? That was an innocent question, Your Highness!" She pouts.
"Oh, hoddy doddy!"
"A laugh you are, Princess."
I look up at her, her eyes sparkling in the faded moonlight, "You are the only person I feel who actually cares about me."
She frowns, "The Prince loves you. Your parents-"
"I was a pawn in my parents game. Hunger for more power."
"What about your brothers?"
"They have not sent any replies to my letters."
"I'm unlovable."
"I don't believe that for one bit." She says sternly.
If only I had that much faith in myself as she does in me.