“…And that’s why I’m in computers,” the boy whose name Gigi couldn’t remember said. Jack? Josh? It didn’t matter. She didn’t like him and definitely didn’t want to be on a date with him. The only reason she was is because she owed Jaida a favor, which was for Gigi to take Jaida’s boyfriend’s brother on a date.
The entire time they sat at the dive bar, that he had suggested, Gigi rested her face in her hand occasionally sipping the light beer he bought for her. Somehow Jim… Jonathan… Jordan! Jordan was his name, talked about himself for the entire date. Instead of focusing on Jordan droning on about computers being the future of the new millennium, she instead occupied her time by watching a girl play darts. The girl’s aim was impeccable, but even so it couldn’t completely drown out Jordan. If she had to listen to it any longer, she’d go ask the girl to go stab her eye out with one of the darts.
Standing up, Gigi announced, “I have to go to the bathroom.”
“Don’t leave through the window.” Jordan laughed awkwardly at his own joke.
“I’d never do that,” Gigi said, forcing a smile.
This was a lie. When Jordan started talking about golfing, she fantasized about how she could break the window with her heel and escape out of the bathroom window and leave the date.
After washing her hands, Gigi touched up her glittery lipgloss. Puckering her lips, she sighed, mentally preparing herself for the rest of the date.
When Gigi opened the door, she heard a voice scream, “What the fuck?”
To Gigi’s horror, when the door opened the rest of the way, a girl was standing there, covering her eye.
“Oh my God, I am so sorry,” Gigi squeaked, eyes wide.
The girl laughed as she held her eye. “No worries.”
When she removed her hand from her eye, Gigi realized it was Dart Girl, and saw just how beautiful she was. It wasn’t her striking eyes or her bright red hair that Gigi noticed first. It was her Smashing Pumpkins shirt.
“I love your shirt,” Gigi said awkwardly. Was it normal to compliment someone you almost took out with a door?
“You look like the last person to like Smashing Pumpkins.”
Gigi couldn’t argue with that. This girl looked as though she stepped out of a Pearl Jam music video. On the other hand, Gigi looked like she stepped out of a Delia’s catalogue.
“Are you kidding? I saw them last year with Rage Against the Machine.”
“No, shit,” the girl gasped. “I was there. Milwaukee, right?”
Gigi nodded excitedly. “What a great show.”
“Seriously, so good… I’m Crystal.”
“Gigi.”
“I haven’t seen you around before, Gigi.”
“Well, I’m only here on a date,” Gigi admitted.
“Who’s the lucky person?” Crystal asked.
“It’s… not going well. Blind date. He’s a real talker.”
“Oh, no. Do you want me to save you from it?”
“Excuse me?” Gigi asked, genuinely unsure of what Crystal was actually asking.
“Do you want the date to end?”
Gigi nodded. “But how…?”
“Just play along with everything I’m about to do. Go back to the guy.”
Gigi did as instructed once she returned to the bar.
“You didn’t escape through the window,” Jordan joked. “I took the liberty of getting you another beer.”
“Great…” Gigi trailed off. Light beer was disgusting, but he’d mentioned earlier in the night a girl like her was probably watching her figure.
“I feel like I’ve done all the talking,” Jordan admitted.
Yeah, no shit.
“Well I--”
Before Gigi could finish, Crystal stumbled to the bar. If Gigi hadn’t had a full conversation with her a few minutes ago, she would have been convinced she was drunk.
“Oh my God! Gigi!” Crystal slurred. “I haven’t seen you in ages!”
Gigi was taken aback, but remembered to play along. “Crystal! How are you?”
“ So good! Oh my God hi!” Crystal squealed acknowledging Jordan.
Jordan shifted on the barstool nervously. “Hi. Crystal was it?”
Crystal nodded excitedly. “It’s so good to meet you.”
“How did you know each other?”
Gigi jumped as Crystal grabbed her hand. “This is my ex!”
“You’re gay?” Jordan asked.
“What can I say? I swing both ways,” Gigi said, batting her eyelashes at Crystal. The entire time, Gigi had no idea what was happening. She was surprised at Crystal’s boldness, and Gigi ended up surprising herself by playing along so easily.
Jordan looked disgusted. “I think I’m going to go.”
The second he left, Gigi said, “Thank you so much.”
Crystal winked. “Anytime. Also, how the hell is that man so homophobic? It’s 1998. Get over it.”
“I feel like I have to get you a drink, considering you just saved my ass,” Gigi said attempting to wave down the bartender. “What’s your drink of choice?”
“Guinness,” Crystal replied as she sat in the barstool next to Gigi.
“Me, too!” Eventually, Gigi got the bartender’s attention. “Can I get two Guinnesses?”
“Bottle or draft?” the bartender asked.
Gigi looked at Crystal, who replied, “Drafts.”
Once they both had their beers, the women sat in a slightly awkward silence. Crystal tapped on the bar before saying, “I have to ask something.”
Gigi set down her glass. “Yeah?”
“When you said you swung both ways…” Crystal lit a cigarette and took a drag. “It’s not too often I meet other gay girls, especially not here, or anywhere that’s not the gay bar.”
Gigi’s sexuality was not something she was open about with most people, especially not with strangers, so she decided to keep her response ambiguous. “I don’t go to many bars, straight or not. I take it you go out to the bars often?”
Crystal tapped her cigarette on the ashtray. “It’s interesting to me.”
“Interesting?”
“As much as my passion lies with saving pretty girls from shitty first dates, I really come here to people watch… Like see that couple playing pool over there? How he’s got his hand around her waist, trying to show her how to take the shot? First of all, he thinks he’s gonna score tonight. Second, you can tell by the way she’s holding the cue that she already knows what she’s doing and is just playing along. More than likely, she’s just in it for the drinks or the attention, or both, and I’m assuming she’s not going to fuck him.”
“How do you know that?”
“See how she’s kind of pulling away?”
Gigi raised an eyebrow. “I’m impressed. How are you so good at that?”
“I just graduated with a master’s degree in psychology, and my dissertation was on body language. I focused a lot with the body language of people on their first dates. Like I said, I think it's interesting.”
"What specifically do you find interesting?" Gigi asked leaning on the bar.
Crystal took a drag before setting the cigarette butt in the ashtray. "It's interesting to see the parts we openly display ourselves on a first date but how some things you just can't hide no matter how hard you try. You can say one thing, but your voice and body can say something else entirely."
“What can you tell by my body language?” Gigi asked as she downed the rest of her beer.
“Well, you’ve been inching closer to me ever since you handed me my beer. You started scooting back a little when I started smoking, which means you probably don’t smoke. As soon as I finished, you inched closer. Your forearm is literally touching mine right now. If I had to guess, I’d guess that you want to kiss me right about now.”
Gigi flushed, without saying a word.
“Am I wrong?” Crystal raised an eyebrow.
“No,” Gigi mumbled.
“I rarely am,” Crystal said just before her lips met Gigi’s.
Gigi had kissed plenty of people, drunk, sober, and everything in between. But, this kiss wasn’t the run-of-the-mill sloppy drunk kiss. The way their lips moved in sync was unlike Gigi had ever experienced. Crystal had her hand on Gigi’s back and pulled her closer as Gigi ran her hand through Crystal’s fiery red hair.
Once Gigi broke the kiss she said, “What can you tell by my body language now?”
“That you want to go back to my apartment.”